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I’ve always been a fan of pressed flower stickers — but a necklace is a much better idea. I saw some fancier versions at Anthropologie recently and really liked them; Etsy of course has a similar option for about a fourth of the price. (For some reason a lot of the pressed flower pendants are very bulbous, which seems like they wouldn’t lay properly as a pendant — seller Iskra Creations seems to have good ratings and a wide variety of flat, pretty pressed flower necklaces and pendants. The pictured necklace, Queen Anne’s lace, is $32. (L-all)Sales of note for 4.18.24
(See all of the latest workwear sales at Corporette!)
- Ann Taylor – 50% off full-price dresses, jackets & shoes; $30 off pants & skirts; extra 50% off sale styles
- Banana Republic Factory – Up to 50% off everything; extra 20% off purchase
- Eloquii – 50% off select styles; 60% off swim; up to 40% off everything else
- J.Crew – Mid-Season Sale: Extra 60% off sale styles; up to 50% off spring-to-summer styles
- Lands’ End – 30% off full-price styles
- Loft – Spring Mid-Season Sale: Up to 50% off 100s of styles
- Nordstrom: Free 2-day shipping for a limited time (eligible items)
- Talbots – Spring Sale: 40% off + extra 15% off all markdowns; 30% off new T by Talbots
- Zappos – 29,000+ women’s sale items! (check out these reader-favorite workwear brands on sale, and some of our favorite kids’ shoe brands on sale)
Kid/Family Sales
- Carter’s – Up to 70% off baby items; 50% off toddler & kid deals & 40% off everything else
- Hanna Andersson – Up to 50% off spring faves; 25% off new arrivals; up to 30% off spring
- J.Crew Crewcuts – Up to 60% off sale styles; up to 50% off kids’ spring-to-summer styles
- Old Navy – 30% off your purchase; up to 75% off clearance
- Target – Car Seat Trade-In Event (ends 4/27); BOGO 25% off select skincare products; up to 40% off indoor furniture; up to 20% off laptops & printers
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And — here are some of our latest threadjacks of interest – working mom questions asked by the commenters!
- If you’re a working parent of an infant with low sleep needs, how do you function at work when you’re in the throes of baby’s sleep regression?
- Should I cut my childcare down to 12 hours a month if I work from home?
- Will my baby have speech delays if we raise her bilingual?
- Has anyone given birth in a teaching hospital?
- My child eats everything, and my friends’ kids do not – how should I handle? In general, what is the best way to handle when your child has some skill/ability and your friend’s child doesn’t have that skill/ability?
- ADHD moms, give me your tips to help with things like behavior in the classroom, attention to detail, etc?
- I think I suffer from mom rage…
- My husband and kids are gone this weekend – how should I enjoy my free time?
- I’m struggling to be compassionate with a SAHM friend who complains she doesn’t have enough hours of childcare.
- If you exclusively formula fed, what tips do you have for in the hospital and coming home?
- Could I take my 4-yo and 8-yo on a 7-8 day trip to Paris, Lyon, and Madrid?
Anon Mom says
Did you change your regular cleaning products to toxic free ones once you had a baby? We use the Babyganics laundry detergent but other than that I just try not to have the baby around when I clean. Any decent priced products you can recommend? I am starting to feel guilty that our baby does not have an organic mattress, organic sheets etc…How diligent are you about not exposing baby to “chemicals”?
CPA Lady says
I do basically nothing differently. The only change I made was to get some of that 7th generation all purpose cleaner. I use regular non-organic free and clear detergent. Nothing special or specifically for babies. I tried to use those felt ball things in the dryer instead of dryer sheets but they sucked, so I went back to dryer sheets. I did do organic milk for the first couple of years, but now we’re back to regular milk.
Cb says
The baby is still cooking but in general, we try to use ‘less’ toxic products around the house (with the exception of my husband’s obsession with mold and mildew spray). I use soap nuts to do laundry, ecover dish soap etc. I think I’ll spring for the natural mattress but there isn’t a huge difference between the two from the company I’m ordering from.
EBMom says
I do have a bit of fear of the “chemicals.” I use bleach products in the bathroom, but mostly vinegar and baking soda elsewhere. (Do not mix vinegar and bleach, BTW, it creates a toxic gas). Vinegar and water and elbow grease will clean just about anything and are cheap. I bought an organic mattress and sheets because baby spends a lot of time on those. I don’t buy all organic clothes, but I do wash clothes until they no longer have that “new” smell and then we wear them (it usually takes more than 1 wash). For normal household products, I don’t buy things, or I return things, that have a strong chemical odor that doesn’t offgas within a day or two. I’m trying to replace all of our furniture to things without flame retardants (other than natural retardants, like wool). We do a splash of vinegar in the final rinse for the laundry and use the wool dryer balls.
You could go crazy on this stuff if you let yourself get too into it. Pick what works for you and your family’s budget and don’t worry about the rest. For me, the sleeping surfaces were hugely important and where I really spent a lot of money for the organic options. Food is my next biggest thing. We always get organic/local options for any fruit or vegetable where you eat the skin or that does not have a skin (like berries and broccoli, but not organic for avocados or banana) and we try to eat fresh foods, not processed stuff. You can’t entirely prevent exposure to everything, and stressing yourself out about it is unhealthy.
Anonymous says
We have our house cleaned professionally once a month (while we are not at home), and the cleaners use their own products which I’m sure are not organic. We use regular Tide laundry detergent. Baby is not eating solids yet but we drink organic milk and I will make an effort to buy organic produce for making baby food. I did buy an organic mattress and sheets, because I could do it easily. Basically if there’s an easy alternative I know of that’s organic, I buy it but if not I don’t worry about it. I wouldn’t know what brand of toxic-free cleaning products to buy (I thought of Honest, but didn’t they have a big controversy about their ingredients?) and I think the benefits of not keeping any cleaning products around for baby (+dog) to get into probably outweighs the slight risk of having our house cleaned with harsher chemicals once a month.
Anon says
I made two changes: Tide Free and Clear, and Meat/Milk with no growth hormones. (And I know they don’t get that meat/milk at daycare, so it’s a half-@ssed change.)
Chemicals are literally everywhere. “Toxic” chemicals will be used in daycares, schools, friend’s homes, etc. You can try to limit their exposure at home, but really, at this point, our society is already down the path.
Pigpen's Mama says
This is pretty much what we’re doing – dye/fragrance free laundry stuff and organic milk (there isn’t much meat eating at home).
I try not to use any cleaning products near her stuff/when she’s around, athough that has more to do with my general laziness and having cleaners every two weeks. Since she eats directly off the tray sometimes, I don’t wipe her highchair down with anything other than water or some organic baby-friendly spray (Babyganics, maybe?).
Betty says
Agreed. We do organic dairy and meat and some fruits and veggies (and wash all fruits and veggies that are not peeled), but that’s about it. We also have a small farm and are becoming increasingly part of our farming community. What I was told by a fellow farmer (whose wife is a very close friend and attorney) really stuck with me: He said that he absolutely could use all organic pesticides, fertilizers, etc., but that some of those are nastier and more toxic than what he can use as a “non-organic” farmer. So we don’t stress that much about organic but instead try to buy from farmers that we know and trust. I realize that was a tangent.
Betty says
Oh and as for cleaning, we have the organic stuff, but with a second stomach virus in a month, I have brought out all the bleach and heavy duty cleaners that I have.
In House Lobbyist says
Check out stop the stomach flu dot com. She’s a scientist and has done tons of experiments. So far we haven’t had any stomach virus spread since I’ve started using her methods. Good luck – stomach flus are the worst!
Betty says
Oh thank you!!
Bottle Help says
Wait, there’s someone else on this board who also has a farm? Also, this sounds exactly like what my farmer husband would say, and which is true. And I’m his attorney-wife. I don’t think we really know each other, but that was something to read!
Betty says
We do!! The farm-attorney combination is shockingly common in my small part of the country (New England). Its a small farm at this point (3 Cattle; somewhere between 15-20 chickens, board 2 horses, pigs coming in the spring), but it is fun, keeps us busy and for me, is a great balance to being an in house attorney.
Bottle Help says
Love it! We’re in the South and have about 70 head of cattle, a dozen sheep, a dozenish chickens, and pigs too. It absolutely provides me the mental and physical balance I need – but I have never actually met another attorney-farmer in real life.
Pogo says
+1 to chemicals are everywhere, and everything is made of chemicals.
That said, we’re pretty crunchy just as a way of life and already use the Trader Joe’s free/clear laundry detergent, seventh generation dish detergent & dish soap, method cleaners, etc.
I’m really only picky on organic food when it comes to the “dirty dozen”. Otherwise I try to get organic when I can but don’t stress. We also try to grow as many veggies & fruits as we can in our garden. Niece & nephew love to pick the strawberries right off the plants and eat them, so hoping little baby Pogo will enjoy that as well!
Betty says
My kids will eat anything that they get to pick off of the vine or out of the ground. Sugar snap peas to carrots to radishes, they will happily eat them standing in the garden, but sauteed with a bit of olive oil and garlic apparently ruins the flavor/experience.
Pogo says
Nephew will eat raw kale and arugula right out of the garden. Which doesn’t even sound appetizing to me and I love my greens! It’s the novelty of it, I think.
Anon in NYC says
I use a free and clear detergent (Tide), but did so pre-baby. I tried switching to all natural and organic cleaning products, but have found that some work better than others and so far I’ve preferred the effectiveness of our chemical-laden toilet bowl cleaner and soft scrub for the tub. In terms of product recommendations, I really like Puracy’s multi-surface cleaner.
Also, my kid doesn’t have organic sheets.
Kim says
Not non-toxics, but we do try to clean more with soap and water instead of simply reaching for a bottle of product; we save that for deep cleaning. I have, however, focused on food. We focus on preparing our own food from scratch instead of eating processed food, buying organic kids’ snacks and milk (e.g., applesauce pouches) , and now began a garden in which we do not use fertilizer. I figure that goes into their systems more frequently than cleaners.
avocado says
I was always a little crunchy even before we had our child, but stepped it up a level once the kid was on the way. I am not willing to go bankrupt over this, drive myself crazy, or alienate my husband with restrictions, so I prioritize my efforts. My top priority is avoiding endocrine disruptors, partly because I did a term paper on endocrine disruption in my “environmental science for lawyers” class when the kid was a toddler. I also try to do what’s best for the environment within reason, but I can’t afford to shop 100% organic.
I buy as much as possible of our dairy organic, but not all the products we use are available in an organic version. I buy antibiotic-free, vegetarian-fed meats and wild-caught seafood. I buy “dirty dozen” produce organic, but sometimes if my extremely picky kid is begging for a particular fruit and organic isn’t available I will buy the conventional version. I figure that it’s better for her to eat conventional fruit than none at all. Unnecessary artificial ingredients, like colors and sweeteners, are entirely banned from my pantry, with the exception of a few pieces of Halloween candy each year and the frosting for the elaborate birthday cakes I make. I try to avoid preservatives as much as possible, but again when it’s a choice between the kid eating a Thomas’s bagel and refusing to eat at all I will let her have the preservative-laden bagel. About two-thirds of our lunches and one-third to one-half of our dinners are vegetarian. Many of our non-vegetarian dishes use meat as an accent rather than the main ingredient. We eat no beef and very little pork.
I could not afford an “organic” mattress for the kid when we made the purchase (see above re. law school), so I did some research and chose a mainstream brand that used boric acid as a fire retardant instead of more toxic chemicals. We use mostly “natural” cleaning products, but only those that are actually effective at cleaning. I make a big effort to avoid artificial fragrances partly because of the phthalates and partly because I have a sensitive nose. We have some glass food storage containers and some “safe” plastic ones because a lunch box full of glass containers is just too heavy and I worry about sending my kid to school with glass. We don’t microwave in plastic. I almost never use plastic wrap. We have stainless steel water bottles. We have a houseplant in every room to help filter toxins out of the air, and I try to air the house regularly when the weather permits.
I don’t know whether organic fabrics are much safer for people in terms of direct skin contact; I suspect they’re mainly better for the environment. I buy them when they’re available and not too much more expensive. I think we have organic sheets and towels.
Ennui says
What are the worst offenders in terms of household products that include endocrine disruptors?
avocado says
Phthalates are a huge category. They are in a lot of plastics, especially flexible ones such as some shower curtains, and also in glass cleaners and artificial fragrances and cheap nail polish. There are a lot of other endocrine disruptors or potential endocrine disruptors in certain plastics. These are released when the plastic is heated, which is why I never microwave or cook in plastic. F i r e r e t a r d a n t s (trying to avoid moderation) are another big category.
EBMom says
Thanks for following up on this, I was also curious.
Cate says
Ah, I just ordered my toddler a new bed and went non-organic (mattress). Bed was one thing I thought I’d definitely go organic on but the reviews of the organic options all said they were so uncomfortable! I was going to go naturpedic for a twin, btw. Anyways, I ended up going for a pretty standard twin that is hopefully not bad. I ordered it from Land of Nod. I could have put more time into finding an organic option that’s not just online, but I give up.
And now I am questioning that decision!
avocado says
Moderation ate my longer reply. We bought our kid a conventional mattress that used boric acid as a flame retardant instead of the really horrible chemicals. That seemed like the safest option we could afford at the time.
avocado says
Okay, seriously, I cannot figure out what triggers moderation. Look for a ma t t r e s s with b o r i c a c i d as a f l a m e r e t a r d a n t. Cheaper than o r g a n i c .
NewMomAnon says
FWIW, I ordered a Naturepedic twin for my kiddo on Amazon and got free shipping through Prime (saved $150 in shipping!). The one I ordered has a waterproof side and a quilted side. The waterproof side is a bit harder than I like, and I will probably get a cushy mattress pad for it, but the mattress isn’t uncomfortable. It’s just not the pillow top we’ve all gotten used to having now (which is basically a way for mattress manufacturers to prevent people from rotating their mattresses so they have to replace them more often, grr).
Naturepedic also makes a waterproof mattress cover and several of the super crunchy sites I read when selecting a mattress suggested using a mattress cover to reduce the offgassing. But…super crunchy, and I took them with a grain of salt. I just worry about the flame retardants, since my family has a history of thyroid issues.
jlg says
we got this same 2-sided mattress for 4-yr-old and he has never slept better. what is too firm for us is appropriate to support their growing bodies.
S says
We use mostly 7th Generation brand cleaning products and dish soap and have been overall happy with them
Anon in NOVA says
I second basically everything everyone else said.
When he was old enough to be a crawler, I switched to cleaning with a vinegar solution on the floors he crawled on most (in case he dropped a puff cereal and ate it, put his slobbery hands in his mouth after rubbing the floor, etc.) but that was my only major change. I cleaned the high chair tray with some sort of food-safe cleaning wipe as well.
I used a free and clear detergent, but that was more because I was concerned about him getting a mystery rash, not because I had chemical concerns (if that makes sense)
Edna Mazur says
I’m really not one that is concerned about “chemicals”, but I am quite frugal so am probably inadvertently being a little crunchy. For laundry soap I make my own with one bar of soap, one cup of borax and one cup of washing soda. Slice the soap thin an mix it all together in a food processor. 1 Tbsp for most loads.
For a multipurpose cleaner, I haven’t found anything that works better than dish soap (I swear by the blue Dawn) mixed with hot vinegar. For a soap scum remover type situation use more soap, for multipurpose cleaner less soap.
In House Lobbyist says
I switched mostly to peroxide for bathroom and kitchens. I started following Dr Annie who writes stop the stomach flu dot com. She has done tons of experiments on cleaning products – and I basically follow her cleaning routine. Basically, I keep a few Clorox wipes around for quick cleanup but now that my 3 year old wants to help wii everything – we mostly use water and vinegar for kitchen and then I do a peroxide spray down at the end of the day.
Frozen Peach says
We are big fans of the Mrs. Meyers’ cleaning and laundry products. Expensive but one of the few things I am willing to splurge on. Tide gives me hives, always has.
That said, I think this is one of those areas where you have to pick your battles or you’d go nuts (ask me how I know– I lived in vegetarian coop houses at my crunchy liberal arts college!!). We avoid the dirty dozen if not organic, buy organic dairy and some meat, try to eat a relatively small amount of meat, no beef. But if we’re out to eat? I will not be asking whether the milk they serve my toddler is organic. Pick the changes that are most comfortable for YOUR family and don’t stress about the rest of them.
anon says
Frozen Peach, did you go to Oberlin? I swear I have PTSD from sweetener policy discussions.
Frozen Peach says
HA! Remind me to tell you about the Diet Coke Controversy of 2005.
I went to Carleton, right up the road. Very similar vibe…
TBK says
I do not buy one single organic thing. And I feel zero guilt. I haven’t seen any study that shows any safety issues. (Also, what are “chemicals”? — I don’t get it. We’re all made up of chemicals.)
HSAL says
Yep. If I buy something organic, it was probably an accident. It’s something I’d like to be more informed about and maybe I’d change my mind on certain things, but until I have time for that? Nope.
Bunny says
Very few safety issues. Environmental concerns, yes. Also much easier to find natural (I know, I know, “natural” is so nebulous too) ingredients and unscented. Lots of traditional products are free of added fragrance but aren’t unscented. And, much less likely to be tested on animals. So, some other things to think about, but “safety” is not a concern.
And, as to “chemicals,” I think you might be a bit pedantic here (respectfully). In the colloquial, non-scientific context, people are almost always referring to toxic / abrasive chemicals (bleach, ammonia, sulfates, whatever).
TBK says
I guess that’s the thing. The term “chemicals” or “toxins” doesn’t really have a definition, at least in the way people use them. And people get freaked out about them, but don’t know what they’re getting freaked out by.
Anonymous says
Me too. Nothing organic at our place unless it is from my husband’s garden or it is the same price in the organic version as the non-organic.
Anononymous says
Please rephrase “chemicals” to “toxins, carcinogens, and poisons.” FOR. THE. LOVE. OF. GOD.
Also, are you experiencing post-partum anxiety? Most people panic at the beginning, then realize they are being nuts and relax. You sound like you are going the other way.
I use water to clean most things, a few bleach wipes (for poop/vomit accidents), Lysol spray in the diaper garbage can, magic erasers, dish soap for everything else.
anon says
I switched to Tide Free and Clear for maybe the first year, more due to sensitive skin concerns than anything else. But it was hard to find and we gave that up fast. My son does seem to have somewhat sensitive skin – at least he gets eczema and when he was younger would randomly break out in hives from time to time – but his symptoms are generally mild and I haven’t noticed any correlation to our detergent. When he was crawling I did try to mop the floors more and used vinegar and water or murphy’s oil soap (the latter is what I use anyway) for that, but that’s about it. Now that he is 4 and peeing all over the bathroom at all times lysol wipes make feel like it is slightly less pee-soaked, so I’ve embraced them.
Anon academic says
Ok so I am fairly passionate about this topic and it is tangential to my professional life (in academia). My personal approach is like many posters – do what I can within the economic and mental health resources I can. I have almost completely banned plastic for foods in my house (we keep a set that never goes in dishwasher or microwave for outside picnics for kids, but plan to replace that with stainless steel). Mattress and new upholstered furniture is something I am willing to splurge on knowing the damage from chemical fire retardants (mattress: latex and wool are naturally fire resistant).
But all of the things we can do as individuals are tiny relative to the potential harms we are faced with daily. No one had the resources or time to figure it out on our own. This is an area we really depend on a higher level to protect us – I think it should be the government role to enact and ENFORCE laws to do so. The science is there on many things but there is no regulation. For example – pvc is a known carcinogen and is also associated with breathing issues. Guess what lots of cheap kids toys are made of? Yep, zero regulation. Now individuals have some power to educate themselves and make choices to avoid certain products but that here is some implicit belief that if a product is on the shelves it should be safe – especially for babies and kids. That belief is in error.
Two Kids Two Years Apart says
What do you wish you had known previously about raising two kids two years apart?
My husband and I just found out that we’re expecting our second child and he or she will arrive just before the second birthday of our first child. We are very excited but I have no frame of reference for how this family dynamic looks. I’m an only child and my husband has a significant age gap between him and his sibling. How does one parent juggle two young children when the other parent is at work? How do you help baby #1 adjust?
Insight and/or book recommendations appreciated!
Betty says
My biggest recommendation is that if there is any way that you can continue your oldest in his/her current care setting (nanny, daycare, whatever) after baby no. 2 comes, I would highly recommend it. Mine are 2.5 years apart, and after our youngest arrived, we continued to send the oldest to daycare full-time while I was on maternity leave. It allowed him to continue to have his own special world that did not involve the baby, and it gave me time to heal and attend to our youngest.
When one parent has both, a baby carrier was a lifesaver. I would put the youngest in the moby or ergo and be able to chase after the toddler. Also, our pediatrician recommended that we set aside 15 minutes each day, at a predictable time, for the oldest to have one-on-one mommy time. It was easier for him to know that after dinner, every day, he would have my undivided attention for a little while.
As for book recommendations, Siblings Without Rivalry is really great.
Kim says
+1. One-on-one mommy time also ensures Daddy gets some one-on-one time with baby.
Two Kids Two Years Apart says
Great suggestions. I like the idea of having a special 15 minutes every day with the oldest. Unfortunately, my husband and I typically work opposite schedules so he is home in the morning alone with the kid(s) and I have evenings. Maybe we can emphasize the special time on days when we’re both home.
My oldest is fortunately taken care of by Grandma in the afternoons. I should have that conversation now with her to ask to continue our normal routine even when I’m on maternity leave. I hadn’t considered that but it makes a lot of sense that even a few hours for my oldest to get away and for me to be alone with the baby would be important.
Cate says
We have two under two right now and this might sound crazy, but I love it. It’s just a lot of fun.
If you are worried about one on one time, some things naturally (at least to start off) will be one on one. We don’t have an official set aside time but my husband does oldest’s bath time and I do her bedtime. That’s a lot of time that each of us spends just focused on her.
Involve the toddler as much as possible – they love to help. Baby will love it too.
I recommend Siblings Without Rivalry but with the caveat that it’s got a lot of worst case scenarios. We really haven’t dealt with jealousy (yet). My older one is enamored with the younger. So be prepared for problems, but don’t create them if you don’t have to!
Momata says
Mine are 20 months apart. I love it. In the very early weeks, I loved that it didn’t take long for Older to adjust because, well, her memory didn’t go back very far. In just a few weeks it was as if Baby had always been there. Now (at 3 and 17 mos), I love that they play together, with the same toys, nearly at the same level. I love that they can both ride in the same side-by-side double stroller (City Mini GT used off Craigslist, I love it). I also love that I can see the end of the baby stage.
Downsides/Recommendations: I nursed, so that meant that Baby was nearly always with me and Older was nearly always with Dad. I had to purposefully build in time to “swap,” and unfortunately this made me feel like I was always “on” because my time with Older was usually when Baby was asleep, which the first time around would have been my time to rest. We have just in the past month gotten to where we don’t really struggle if one parent is in charge of both. (Maybe we are just wimps.) When Baby was taking a morning and a late afternoon nap, and Older was taking an early afternoon nap, we pretty much were never able to go anywhere. (My kids do not sleep in strollers.)
anon says
My older two kids are two years and 1 month apart. It has been great in so many ways. I worked part time when the kids were little so was home with both kids a lot, with some help from the grandparents. For the early days, my advice would be:
(1) if you are going to change anything in your older one’s routine because of the baby, start before the baby is born. For example, I used to give the older one’s bath, but during the last few months of the pregnancy my husband started giving her baths so that my daughter was used to the change.
(2) If both kids are crying/need something, tend to the older one first. Baby won’t remember, but older one will!
(3) If you have help, have them help with the baby as much as possible so that you can spend time with the older one. I felt like I missed a little on baby snuggle time, but I found that the baby was happy as long as someone was holding and loving on him, it didn’t have to be me. But my older one could tell if someone was “taking her away” from mom and baby.
(4) Baby wearing was super helpful – we walked to the park almost every day and baby was happy in the baby carrier and older one could run around and play like usual.
It’s not easy, but totally doable. In some respects I found it easier to have such a close age range. We really didn’t have any jealousy issues and my older one took the addition of the new baby in stride. It was like she never knew any different. Over the years there have been different struggles, but over all I still think its been great. Good luck!
Ifiknew says
Looking at breast pumps – any preferences between renting a hospital grade, spectra, and Medela?
Thanks in advance for any help!
avocado says
This was a decade ago, but I had zero success with the Pump in Style and had to rent a hospital grade pump. It was theoretically portable, but cumbersome in practice.
Anonymous says
Agree on the hospital grade pump. My office has one, and it worked a billion times better than my personal pump (Lansinoh, which I thought was great until I used the hospital grade). However, I’d still want a more portable one for traveling, etc., as the hospital grade is big and heavy.
SC says
I think it really depends on your body and your particular needs. My son was born premature and had a difficult time nursing at the beginning. I rented a hospital grade pump for the first few months because it’s better at stimulating production than the PIS.
I switched to the PIS, provided by my insurance, when I went back to work. Obviously, it’s much easier to carry back and forth if you have to do that (I often nursed then pumped). Since by then my supply was pretty established and my son was nursing well, it worked fine.
Em says
My son is 11 months and I have used the PIS to pump 3 times a day at work since he was 10 weeks and also brought it to pump on a 4-day vacation. I have nothing to compare it to, but I have no complaints with it.
Anon says
I have the spectra and love it. nothing to compare it to but compared to how much my friends complain about pumping (who used the medela) I think it’s better? It’s very comfortable and efficient, takes me 10 minutes and doesn’t hurt. Only downside is that my insurance only covered the one that plugs in, so I’ve had to resort to a manual pump from time to time when I am places without outlets.
SBJ says
The Symphony is really nice-I had one because my son was early and I used it to establish my supply. I loved it and then when I went back to work (which wasn’t until 11 months), my company had one in their Lactation rooms. I also have the PISA and it’s fine, but it’s louder and less comfortable than the Symphony. I didn’t notice a difference in production between the two, though I didn’t start with the PISA until 4 months. I know Medela is releasing a home version of the Symphony-Sonata, maybe?-that could be worth a look. It can be really helpful to have easy access to spare parts, and Medela parts are everywhere, so if you, say, travel and wake up and realize you forgot your flanges, you know you can run to the nearest Target and get them… Not that I speak from personal experience… That said, I hear great things about the Spectra and if I have a second, I’d be tempted to try. And there are hacks so that you can use Medela parts with the Spectra pump. Hope that helps!
Jdubs says
So after having nursed/pumped three kids and tried almost every pump out there, here is my opinion. Medela PIS/Hospital grade got about the same output for me. Medela was far superior to the Ameda pump, the Ameda was awful. Also tried a Hygeia – didn’t love it. I recently for baby #3 tried a Spectra. Output was about the same as the Medela but the actual pumping was more comfortable/less painful. Also loved that I got the Spectra with a rechargeable battery – that has come in really handy.
blueberries says
I strongly prefer Freemie cups so I don’t have to get undressed to pump. Slight preference for the PISA with Freemie cups rather than the Freemie pump.
Closet Redux says
Any tips to help a toddler with a skin-picking habit? My kiddo takes any tiny nick of a wound and turns it into a massive open gash with her distracted picking. The worst is when they’re on her face, she looks so wrecked! We keep her nails clipped very short, put neosporin and bandaids on where we can, but the face ones are almost always impossible to cover because of their location. We remind her that we have to take care of our skin and we don’t want to get an infection, but she picks without thinking so I don’t think that reasoning with her is going to work. Ideas?
Relatedly, recommendations for a great moisturizer for a toddler’s face for these brutal winter months? An ounce of prevention will be worth a pound of cure in this case, I know, and keeping her skin from chapping in the winter is a top priority.
anne-on says
The heavy duty cerave or eucerin creams (in a jar, not a pump) are the only things that worked on my son’s super duper dry eczema prone skin in winter. Have you tried the small hydrocolloidal bandages for the face? They’re labelled as acne patches (nexcare and cosrx) but they don’t have any active medicine, they’re just small bandages for the face that help promote healing (and suck gross gunk out of pimples). Very gentle and not super sticky, so won’t hurt to take off (though will stay on, and may help prevent additional picking).
Msj says
Vanicream is great as a moisturizer and safe for sensitive skin
For itchy spots, I have to use a specialty bandage on my son – duo derm. It comes in large squares that can be cut up. It’s gentle on the skin and he does a pretty good job of not picking them off. Can stay up to 3 days between changing. Downside is that you have to order from medical specialty store. But far more effective than bandaids at staying and covering.
Good luck!
JTX says
We really like the Mustela hydra stick to treat dry or irritated skin on my kids’ faces.
anon says
Aquaphor
Double Stroller says
Any fans of the Chicco Cortina double stroller? Or something similar? I will have a two year old and a newborn and like that I can use the Chicco car seat with it. I would like the stroller to be on the smaller side / able to easily go through store and restaurant doors without issue (so probably not looking at a side by side). Any comments appreciated!
Anon says
lots of side by sides are designed to go through doors without issues. I had and loved a Stroll Air Duo (universal car seat adapter) – other great options are the Mountain Buggy Duet or the Bugaboo Donkey.
Anonymous says
Late to the party, but at least in Canada doorways have to be big enough to fit a wheelchair, which I believe is the same width as most double side by side strollers. I’m sure you can run into issues with private buildings or historic areas but generally speaking, from what I understand, it’s not an issue. Chico has car seat adapters for a lot of strollers (ie City select, city mini double, uppa baby…. I read a lot about strollers) check out the Strollerqueen Strollerswap group on Facebook. Lots of advice and reviews.
Alternatives to Ferber/ CIO says
DS is 6 months old and a jolly fellow. Always content, nurses well, hits all milestones. But: The only way we can get him to nap during the day is by babywearing or pushing him around in his stroller. At night, he will only fall asleep while BF. He´ll then sleep for 4-6 hours. After that, he´s awake and fusses every 1 ½ hours, but will fall asleep within 5 minutes of nursing.
He does not take a paci or bottle, has no lovey anymore (after he almost suffocated because he stuffed it into his mouth), and is disinterested in music. So his soothing method is apparently either physical contact/ movement or comfort nursing.
A sleep trainer has strongly advised us to Ferber him asap. She considers falling asleep as a battle that we as parents need to win at 6 months at the latest.
I just don´t buy it…
If we put him in his crib after a bedtime routine while he´s tired but still awake, he´ll just grin at us and play with his feet/ PJs/ crib bars for hours. If we leave the bedroom, he starts fussing and escalates screaming literally for hours until he´s purple. He is inconsolable until we give in after 2-3 hours and either carry him around or I bf him.
Any ideas on how to help DS fall asleep other than Ferber/CIO?
Anon says
Try the No Cry Sleep Solution by Pantley. Worked for us. Nothing wrong with falling asleep while nursing.
If he’s having a growth spurt or teething, he may want to nurse more at night but every 1 1/2 hours is tough. You can nurse and then DH can settle him.
Anon says
adding that there is zero science that indicates that babies must CIO by 6 months.
anne-on says
Have you seen this about tension increasers/decreasers? Might be some interesting thoughts in the comment thread.
http://askmoxie.org/blog/2011/01/tension-increasers.html
Alternatives to Ferber/ CIO says
Thanks! The comment “I didn’t see how having a cranky, awake baby and a bunch of vomit was an improvement over having a happy, awake baby” pretty much sums up my thoughts on the sleep trainer´s recommendation.
EBMom says
Get a new sleep consultant. There are lots of ways to approach this and it can help to have someone who is on the same page as you to coach you through this in person. The 6 month comment is ridiculous, but **personal opinion incoming that you may or may not agree with** I do think there is an advantage to getting good sleep habits in place by 16 to 18 months because it becomes so much harder if the child is not contained in a crib. Before 16 months it is pretty rare that they can climb out of the crib. Dealing with sleep problems after they are out of the crib is a whole new ballgame, and I know 2 moms who wish they could go back and sleeptrain a little earlier (but not necessarily by 6 months!) after going on 3 years of broken sleep.
For the night nursing, the Precious Little Sleep blog has some great tips for breaking the connection between nursing and sleeping. It can be a big roadblock for independent sleep when baby relies on nursing to sleep. That website has tons of other great info too.
You’ve got plenty of time to try lots of other things before resorting to CIO.
Anonymous says
+1 to the preciouslittlesleep blog. Very useful stuff here.
Anonymous says
Agree with EBMom. Get a new sleep consultant. There’s a wide range of options here. And a wide range of things that fall under “CIO” and somewhere in there is something that you’ll probably be comfortable with, especially if the alternative starts looking like years of too little sleep for your whole family. I’ve seen friends go down the too little sleep for far too many years rabbit hole and it’s not pretty.
Personal opinions based on having 3 kids of my own and having close friends with kids are as follows: the 6 months at the latest part is bs. A lot of pro-sleep training people I know say 6 months at the earliest! I’d say 6-9 months. However, I think EBMom’s suggestion of getting good sleep habits in place by 16-18 months is a little late. I’d say 12 to 14ish month is better. After that it’s going to be a rough ride.
Anon says
I’m not sure this is the sort of advice you are looking for but our experience is not all CIO is the same. We did it at 8 months with our first expecting heartbreak and no sleep. She cried for 7 min the first night, 3 min the second and never again. We kicked ourselves for not doing it earlier.
With #2, we had a good sleeper until … We didn’t. It got bad fast- at 5 months she would only nurse or bottle to sleep, and even then would wake up upon transfer. 20 minute naps were a success, when they happened, which was not frequent. She wouldn’t settle for DH- it was me or scream. Baby was miserable and we were miserable. After a week, we took her to the doc. She had an ear infection and we treated it but the sleeping didn’t improve. A week later I was desparate, esp since I was going in my first overnight (3 day) business trip two weeks later.
DH finally said (after trying for 30 minutes to calm baby while I was trying to get 3 interrupted hours of sleep) that being with him was essentially CIO. He was right. So we started the more official CIO that night and within 3 days I had a champ sleeper. She took almost 35 min the first night, then 20 min the next night, then <5 min the third night and it was just grumbly fussing vs real crying. We tackled naps at the same time and it was like OH, I guess I should just be quiet and take a nap eh? Cool.
She now goes to bed without crying at 7pm, and sleeps either straight through til 8 or gets up once for a big huge poop and quick snack around 5, then right back to bed. Nap at 10/10:30 and 2/2:30 for about 3 hours of Naptime sleep (usually one 2+ hour nap and one 45 min nap). Some naps are no-cry, some are fuss for <10 min but otherwise no cry.
Anon says
We are going through a similar situation with our 4 month old baby. I am thinking to get him a crib soother. Anybody used one of these?
https://www.amazon.com/Baby-Einstein-Sea-Dreams-Soother/dp/B006YBHE6M/ref=cm_cr_arp_d_product_top?ie=UTF8
anon says
Just be aware that 4 months is premier sleep regression time, so it may get better even if you do absolutely nothing different.
We have a crib soother but got it much later.
Anonymous says
Most sleep consultants don’t recommend these. Very stimulating which is the opposite of what you want when trying to get kiddo to sleep.
Anon says
I had no idea. Thanks for letting me know.
Anononymous says
We’re at 14 months and nursing to sleep. I am terrified. I don’t know how she will ever get to sleep normally and I am sure that my life will be a living hell in the very near future. I am so, so over nursing. I wish I had been more insistent with my husband about this when she was younger. But he kept insisting that she was sleeping well (she was — sleeping through the night at 2 months) and not to mess with it. I wish we had just done CIO when she was little. I am so going to pay for it in the next few months.
Anon says
Before bed is the hardest feed to drop. Drop all the other feeds first, that will reduce your milk supply significantly. Nurse for a set period of time (ten minutes), then hand her over to DH for him to read a book while she has milk from a sippy. He can sing/rock her to sleep.
EBMom says
You can still do CIO! But also try more gradual methods first. Like Anon said, just separate the nursing from bedtime. You can do it gradually or cold turkey, whatever works best for you. So the new bedtime routine might have nursing first, then bath, books, songs, and bedtime. Or whatever. But your child should be fully awake at the end of the nursing session.
Anonymous says
I’m the anon who just agreed with EBMom above. You are on the cusp of where sh!t is going to go down and your life will s*ck for a long time but it’s not too late. DO IT NOW. If you can do gradual, great. If no, get yourself (and only you) a hotel room for the weekend and don’t look back. Get your husband a sleep consultant to provide a sleep plan if you think he needs someone to hold his hand (nothing wrong with needing this).
layered bob says
I think it is expecting too much to make a person who has been alive for fewer than 180 days fend for themselves in the dark – I recall from reading “Health Sleep Habits Happy Child” that Weissbluth says that “the goal of sleep training is to convince the baby that no one is ever coming for him no matter what he does so he might as well lie still.” Uhhh. I know some kids take to sleep training that young but I don’t think it’s fair to expect every kid to, so don’t let your sleep consultant pressure you.
We nursed to sleep until 13 months, at which point we explained one day that “before, we nursed to sleep, but tonight, mama would nurse her right after her bath and then daddy would sit by her until she fell asleep”, and that was that. We talked through it a couple times and she was a little grumpy but has not nursed to sleep since (now 18 months, still nursing morning and night and overnight when I feel like it). So I don’t think that continuing to nurse to sleep for a while longer is going to mean nursing to sleep forever, if you don’t want to.
EBMom says
For a contrasting view, Weissbluth’s book made a lot of sense to me and gave me a wonderful sleeper. I did not take the above message from his book at all, although I understand that not everyone supports CIO (although to me, his book is so much more than that–I learned so much about sleep cycles and baby sleep development from his book that it inspired me to go and research about 20 scientific articles on baby sleep on my own, as well as to submit my baby’s sleep data to an ongoing NYU sleep study on infant sleep). But this is definitely an area where there are lots of “good for you, not for me” opinions on sleep training, so I’m supportive of whatever works for any particular family. Just wanted to add a different viewpoint on Weissbluth’s book for any moms that may not have read it.
Anonymous says
Not what you want to hear, but I have never ever heard anyone say they regret doing Ferber. Just rip the bandaid off. 6 months is definitely not too late but it definitely gets harder as they get older.
EBMom says
Along the same lines . . . no one is thrilled, happy and excited to do CIO. The vast majority of parents end up there as a last resort when everything else has failed and they just can’t go on waking up every 45 minutes, 90 minutes or whatever, with the baby. Everybody should do what works for them. If you are nursing to sleep and don’t mind waking up for night feedings, then absolutely don’t do CIO. But if you can’t drive safely because you are so sleep deprived that it is torture, then you have to start looking at options. And CIO is always an option, even if it isn’t the right one for you right now.
NewMomAnon says
6 months is not a magic age. I couldn’t do full extinction now because my kiddo (age 3) is way too smart and destructive to be left alone while screaming her head off, but I think it would have worked until at least age 2 (when I’m certain she would have thrown herself out of her crib in protest).
And I’m going to give you this bit of cheerleading – if you are worrying about this, chances are you have already established a loving, trusting relationship with your baby. You will make millions of decisions about your child’s health and well being over the next decades. Whatever decision you make about sleep training is going to be fine; it will be a few days/weeks out of your multi-month relationship to date, and an insignificant drop in the bucket with regard to your future relationship. I agonized over this way too much.
Pogo says
Thanks to everyone who responded about placenta previa the other day. I’ve made it 3 days without bleeding now (yay) and the OB is going to scan me again at 15w to see if it has moved.
If it moves by then I’ll be allowed to travel, if not, she doesn’t want me to fly. If I can’t attend my upcoming meetings, it will be good practice for me setting boundaries as a working mom! And that’s what webex is for, right?
Anon in NOVA says
I’m glad to hear you’ve had a calm 3 days in the bleeding department. I can’t imagine how scary that is every time it happens, even if the “rational” part of your brain knows things are OK.
And you’re right- it’s good practice. It will all be fine :)
bluefield says
I didn’t see your post about placenta previa but my mom had it with my brother (her last child). She says she bled every day but my brother in now 19, so it turned out fine. She had a planned C and she also said that had she known about it, all of us would have come out that way.
Pogo says
every day?! I would have gone insane.
I also feel cheated because this was supposed to be the nine months I didn’t need to worry about being surprised by bleeding. Moral of the story: always carry pads.
Anon says
I didn’t see your post either. But I had SCH and bled from weeks 4-20 straight with my son, who is now 2 years old and completely healthy. I had just come off of 2 miscarriages, so I had complete distrust of my own body and I found it impossible to believe that everything would turn out okay. But it did. And yes, learning to follow modified bed rest for 16 weeks with a toddler and a new promotion was a very tough lesson in setting boundaries and knowing my own limits.
Good luck, I’m thinking of you.
shortperson says
LO is going regularly enough on the little potty that we are sick of cleaning it out and ready to move up. LO has fallen into toilets before and won’t sit on a big one without having someone hold her hands but i’m not sure how long i can expect that to last.
i can’t decide whether to get new toilet seats with a fold down seat for kids, or just to get a separate “ring.” any thoughts? any recs of products?
mascot says
We went with the seat that has the kid-sized insert built in. The ring just seemed like another thing for my kid to play with/ carry off.
EBMom says
We started off with the separate ring and quickly upgraded to a fold down seat for both bathrooms in the house. It is so much easier than the ring and they weren’t that hard to install.
anon says
We got one with the built in fold-down kid seat and really liked it. They really aren’t very expensive – what’s the downside? You can also remove it very easily when your kid outgrows it.
Betty says
A third vote for the fold down seat. It is so much easier for all involved. Plus the ring things are tough to clean (the part where the hard plastic meets the softer seat) and get really gross quickly.
shortperson says
Thanks. The downside of the ones to install is that I can’t figure out which one to get and they all seem to have mixed reviews on Amazon. I wasnt sure how long we’d need it for. But sounds like that’s the way to go.
EBMom says
Just get the right shape for your toilet (I think that round or elongated are the only options). We have one that is Bemis and I forget the company for the other one (it has the “whisper close” feature, which doesn’t really work but I don’t care). Both work just fine and both were ordered off Amazon.
mascot says
+1 for the Bemis. We got ours at home depot.
Crib Soother says
Reposting from above: Anyone used a crib soother? If yes, did your baby like it and did it help with falling asleep?
https://www.amazon.com/Baby-Einstein-Sea-Dreams-Soother/dp/B006YBHE6M/ref=cm_cr_arp_d_product_top?ie=UTF8
mascot says
We used the FP version and it was fine. It played music for a while (that wasn’t super annoying) and then made bubble noises. We also used a ceiling fan and sound machine in the room so I don’t know how much it helped falling asleep. But he did like it when he got a little older and could kick/bat it to turn it on if he woke up and wanted something to look at.
NewMomAnon says
I used the Cloud B Tranquil Turtle for my kiddo, and she loved playing with it, but refused to sleep if it was on. Well, she actually just refused to sleep period, so maybe it wasn’t the turtle, but the turtle didn’t help. It is very soothing though….
Anon for this gripe says
MLM Rant:
I’m getting very frustrated with the number of people on my newsfeed who have been sucked in to the MLM game. Smart, educated women with decent careers! I know some of them are struggling for money due to divorces etc. and I think that’s why it’s frustrating me so much. I looked into it and all your friends selling leggings had to spend FIVE THOUSAND DOLLARS to get started. That’s insane.
Sorry/end rant
Anon academic says
Seriously. The pitches on newsfeeds are easy enough to just ignore but I just got my first personal message via FB to buy makeup…I thought I could just ignore it but she followed up. I really resent being made to feel guilty for not wanting to connect when all you want to do is sell me something.
Onlyworkingmomintulsa says
Ughhh, I am so annoyed by this too. You are not alone! I do not want overpriced skincare/leggings/stick-on nails/ugly bags/lipsick/shakes.
Am I missing something?
Anon as well for this says
Ha, oh man. I am so with you. I’m seeing a friend this weekend who I haven’t seen since she started on her recent MLM conversion. I’m really worried she’s going to go on and on about it and I’ll feel pressured to buy stuff from her.
I find MLMs very predatory and borderline cult-like. It’s not a legitimate business! It is an actual pyramid scheme! How do smart women not get this??
NewMomAnon says
A few of my friends and acquaintances have dabbled in MLM, and it’s always been short lived – they realize how much work it is to make even a small amount of money, and then get out. It’s such a seductive pitch though; “Earn extra money in your free time, completely on your own schedule, with no boss or sales targets! “Own” your own business with no new skills and minimal up front investment!” I totally understand how people get into MLM. I don’t understand how anyone stays in MLM; if you have the hustle to make money doing MLM, you’d make so much more money doing some other sales-related task.
Anon for this gripe says
Right? I cringe when I see friends who took out a loan for a couple of thousand dollars to “get started” in a MLM. would have been better off getting a weekend retail job!
Anon says
My friends seem to follow a slightly different pattern. They really do love the products at first and spend way too much money on them, usually several hundred dollars in just a few months. Then they do the “I’m just becoming a consultant for the discount” dance, where they pretend like it totally makes sense to spend $5000, because obviously they would have bought most of that anyway. Then they start selling, just because there were so many good deals they couldn’t pass up (in truth it’s all the crap that they didn’t want to keep from the starter pack, and they’re realizing they don’t love it as much as they did). They fake the love to all their friends for a couple months trying to just make back that initial $5K. If they make back the $5K, then they see the $100 profit and think, oh that wasn’t too bad, let’s try again. Repeat a few cycles until they finally give up and never talk about the company or buy its products again.