Are You Still Paying For Childcare like Daycare or a Nanny? (Are You Seeing Babysitters, Nannies, Grandparents?)
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One of the biggest questions right now for working parents is CHILDCARE — when the regular system can resume, whether you’ll lose your spot/caregiver if you don’t keep paying, etc, etc. So let’s discuss! Here are a few questions to kickstart the discussion, but obviously each situation will be different…
If your kids’ daycare has closed, are you still paying for daycare? How has your daycare dealt with the #stayathome orders, if your state has one — has there been a way to pause services? If you have decided to end your payments, are you worried about getting a spot when things open up again? (There was just a great thread on this on Corporette, and another one here…)
If you still have the option for daycare (or school!) (for example, you’re an “essential employee” and childcare is provided through your work) — are you sending your kids? (Some states have closed all childcare centers except for those serving essential workers; some states only have “recommended school closures.”) Are you nervous about your kids contracting COVID-19 from someone there and/or passing it to others?
If you have a nanny or babysitter, are you still paying them even if they are social distncing and not coming to your home? How long do you plan to do that? If you your nanny/babysitter HAS been coming to your home, have you taken extra steps to insure that it’s a “closed loop,” or that you’ve socially distanced long enough to ensure that none of you have been exposed to the virus?
If you have grandparents watching your kids as a large part of your childcare, are they still doing so, or are you social distancing from them? (We talked about granny as nanny a few years ago!) If they have been coming to your home (if they don’t live with you regularly, have you taken extra steps to insure that it’s a “closed loop”? If you did social distance for a while, when did you decide (or when will you decide) that you’ve socially distanced long enough?
Are you enlisting older siblings to watch your younger child(ren)? How is that going? Is it something new you are trying, or have they watched their siblings before?
Have you tried virtual babysitting, by asking either a relative, friend, or an existing babysitter? Or would it not work well for your child(ren)? (Or is screentime in general your new babysitter?)
When do you think it will be safe to send kids to daycare or school again? In the federal government’s plan to reopen segments of the country, the first steps include “reopen[ing] community settings where children are cared for, including K-12 schools, daycares, and locally attended summer camps, to allow the workforce to return to work.”
There are no easy answers right now!
Here’s one brilliant idea I read about somewhere: If you need to go to the grocery store, for example, but can’t leave the kid(s) home alone, see if you can get a friend, family member, or care provider with a car to “babysit” your kids while you go into the store. Everyone stays in their own cars, but you park right next to each other so the babysitter can see the kids. When the weather is warmer, in theory, people could do the same and “watch” kids from a distance…
Stock photo via Pexels / Gustavo Fring.
In a state with stay at home orders; daycare has been closed since mid-March. We paid April tuition to hold our spots, but will be able to credit that money to a future month of care once they’re able to re-open.
My parents watch my kids normally, and they’re both 65+ and my mom has some preexisting conditions — so we’re social distancing and it’s killing my husband’s and my productivity. But when can we stop? Every time we get a grocery delivery or walk past someone on the sidewalk I feel like the clock resets — and they’re going out and doing more walks/drives than we are.
I am a corporate lawyer and was WFH before all of this started. We have a nanny that comes to the house two days a week. She is social distancing and has elderly parents so she’s being extra careful. We are also isolating and being extra careful. So we figure that’s as closed as the loop will get for us. Don’t get me wrong, I do still have moments of panic and paranoia about it.
Our 4 year old attends a private preschool that is currently closed due to a “safer at home” order. The school suspended tuition for April but asked for donations in lieu of tuition. We paid our tuition as usual because we’re fortunate to have not had a change in our income and had already budgeted for the year’s tuition with our dependent care FSA. We’ll continue to pay May’s tuition even if it is suspended again. We love the school and they are really hurting financially due to this situation.
When this all went down my husband was just returning from paternity leave after birth of our 2nd daughter. We’ve hired our nanny and starting paying her, but still distancing for now since we have the little one and our community is still on the upswing for quite a while. So right now our nanny helps me plan out the days for our oldest and will FaceTime her a bit. I want to get to a spot where we have better testing and significant reduction in cases before we ease up on the distancing but my husband and I are already working around the clock to balance childcare and work. So we’ll see…
School is closed. The 5 year old does two Zoom classes (15 minutes each) a day. Her teacher has put up a thoughtful, optional curriculum online. We barely follow it (screentime is working mom’s friend), but it is nice to have. Full private-school tuition applies. We will keep paying through the end of the year, but Fall 2020 is a big question in my mind. I do not think it will be safe to send my child back to school even if they re-open. I’m fine with paying out tuition this year, but I can’t imagine paying full private tuition next year if the school is closed or we choose not to send our child. My child goes to a very small school and I am worried that it will completely shut down because of this crisis. I honestly don’t think it will be safe for children to go back to school until we have a vaccine or enough herd immunity has built up. Neither of those will realistically happen by the fall. It could be a very long time. 18 months is not an absurd projection. But I’m not sure the social fabric holds together that long if Congress won’t provide basic income for the unemployed and start tackling some systemic issues, so I really don’t know what happens.
We have two kids in daycare. Tuition was suspending for April but we have to start paying in May to keep our spots. We are grateful for the suspension, and both remain employed so we will begin paying again in May. I have no idea when my kids will go back but we are years away from K, so I assume we will need the spot eventually.
We have been very strictly following social distancing, beyond what is required in our state. But after a month at home pregnant with a toddler and two parents trying to work from home, we are throwing in the towel and hiring part-time help. I know there is a risk but I am out of ideas. I have to bill my time and simply haven’t been getting enough hours, so the only other option I see is to quit my job.
We are still paying 50%. We love our provider and want her to still be around when this is over!
We have a two year old that is usually cared for by a nanny, who we pay on the books. In NYC where there is “PAUSE”/stay at home order, although childcare providers, which may technically include nannies, are considered essential workers. However, our nanny is in her mid-60s — she would have been willing to keep coming in, and in fact I suspect she’s bored at home alone. But we didn’t feel comfortable asking her to take public transportation each day. So we’re still paying her the full salary and juggling childcare between me and my husband, while both WFH full time. Luckily we’ve been able to balance hours on and off. I’ve been a lot busier than my husband due to work (legal work for a bank), but now that the stock market is less hectic, it’s just normal busy which is manageable instead of Hair on Fire like the first two weeks. We’re also continuing to pay our housekeeper who usually comes every other week, even though she’s not cleaning. I feel pretty strongly that because we are continuing to get paid and are not subject to economic insecurity ourselves, it is the right thing to do.
Our two kids (4 and 1.5) are normally in full time daycare. Once they closed, they stopped charging tuition so we haven’t been paying since mid-March. It’s a large center so hopefully they ‘ll be ok financially and all the teachers can come back, assuming it’s within the next few months.
We don’t have other help during the week when we work but my parents (<65, no major health issues, were already retired/WFH and basically living the socially distant life) have come over occasionally on the weekends to take the kids outside and to give us a break. It's a risk we're all willing to take. I think the risk of one of us getting it and passing it on to them will be higher when I return to commuting on public transit/kids are back in daycare vs. now when literally all we do is sit at home, go on walks or go to the grocery store 1x week so I'm not sure how long we can realistically not see each other.
We have to keep paying our closed DC daycare for 3yo and 1yo to keep our spots. In mid-March, we moved out of DC to my retired parents’ house in a rural area. We couldn’t get our hours in without their help. They are going to burn out soon so we’re taking whatever leave we can accumulate to lessen the burden on them. It would be impossible for those of us with very young kids to telework during regular work hours without help – and our jobs require us to be available during core hours. As Feds, we are not eligible for the explanded FMLA program.
My state has a stay at home order, but daycare is expressly exempt as “essential business” and a lot of daycares in my area are open. However my university-run daycare voluntarily shut in mid-March, about a week before our state’s SAH order. They are not charging tuition currently. The university president has guaranteed all university employees will remain in paid status through June 30. I am desperately hoping, but not that optimistic, that daycare can reopen by July 1. If it doesn’t and assuming I still have a job (not a sure thing), I would be happy to contribute partial tuition (at least 50%, possibly more) to help support teachers and staff. We love this daycare and the staff and will be devastated if it shuts permanently as a result of this.
We currently have no childcare and are fortunate that we’re managing pretty well without any. My biggest concern is my preschooler’s social development (especially since she’s an only child) and unfortunately bringing in a babysitter or nanny doesn’t fix that problem. As much as we love our daycare, if they don’t reopen by fall, I think we’re going to be looking into other daycares and preschools in the area. I’m really scared my child won’t develop normally if she goes a year or more without interacting with another child. In theory I like the idea of finding another quarantine family and being “quarantine buddies” (especially once the SAH order is lifted) but we don’t have anyone we know well enough to do that (ie., we wouldn’t be any other family’s first choice) which makes me feel guilty and like I’m failing my kid by not having more of a village here.
Our kindergartener is out of school for the rest of the academic year, and her after care program stopped charging tuition (which was pretty low to begin with). Daycare for our toddler closed a few weeks ago and also stopped charging tuition. We both still have our jobs and are setting the extra money aside in the event we lose income or need to figure out extra childcare this summer (if we need to hire a nanny, for example, so that we can go back to work). We do have an after-school sitter who we’ve continued to pay, even though we’re not currently using her. I’m hopeful once the stay at home order lifts (maybe) at the end of the month that we can get some relief, or at least let my kids spend a couple of hours with their grandparents. We have been socially distancing to the extreme and are managing to both get some work done, but we’re exhausted.
I have one kid in daycare. It’s closed now, but we started keeping her home about 2 weeks before the official closing because we didn’t feel comfortable sending her. Daycare says it will reevaluate on May 6, but I don’t have high hopes that it’ll reopen that soon. We are currently paying 25% tuition to keep our spot. It would’ve been 75% but the daycare applied for, and got, some money through the CARES Act to keep paying the teachers.
I have no clue what we’ll do if daycare is closed through the summer. Our older child enough to fend for himself at home right now, but the younger kiddo still needs a lot from us. What we’re doing now isn’t sustainable; productivity has tanked. Older kid watching younger kid usually results in fighting because younger kid totally resists being “bossed” by her big brother.
In the current environment, I’m not sure how we’d even find a sitter.