Weekend & Family Friday: Friendship Bracelets Craft Activity Set

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Oh, Melissa and Doug — I’d kiss you both if I could. My son loves the paint with water books, the puzzles, the pretend food, the art easel, etc., etc., etc. I came across this kit and thought it would be a good idea for kids in the recommended age range. I loved making friendship bracelets when I was younger with this embroidery thread. I also love how this kit comes with embellishments to jazz up the bracelets. What this really made me think of was maybe your child could mail a friendship bracelet to one of their friends that they are missing as a way of connecting from afar. How low-tech — using the USPS! The set is $6.99 at Amazon. Friendship Bracelets Craft Activity Set 

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Im four weeks back from my second maternity leave, and already discouraged. (Went back the day of my state’s stay home order.) Boss is frustrated with my work and billables, rude opposing counsel, etc. And I’m already on a reduced schedule. I know everyone is stressed but it’s hard not to take personally. What’s the pep talk or mantras you use to keep yourself motivated? Advice?

Because having your child go back and forth between homes during a pandemic isn’t stressful enough already…

My ex-husband’s grandmother died in a faraway state. He is traveling home to be with family. I assume this means he will be flying. I can also almost guarantee they do not follow any social distancing recommendations in his family of origin and that they will have more than 10 people gathering, and way more than that coming in and out of their home. The area he is traveling to is one of the hot spots in the national news.

I know I don’t have any standing to ask him to not see his kid for 14 days after returning, but I hate this.

Anyone want to make me feel better about excessive pregnancy weight gain? I’m barely 26 weeks pregnant and I’ve already gained nearly 27 pounds, including 10 in the first trimester. With my first pregnancy (less than two years ago) I was also over the recommended weight gain the entire time; it tapered off somewhat in the third trimester but I still gained 40 pounds total. I lost all but 5 pounds without much effort, though I imagine that may be harder this time with both a toddler and a newborn at home.

I’ve been exercising almost every day and eating like I normally do for the most part (quarantine has thrown that off a bit, admittedly). My doctor hasn’t expressed any concerns and I’m not worried from a medical standpoint; I’m just feeling huge and demoralized.

Today just seems hard. I work up feeling that way and reading the comments it seems like lots of people here did too. I was trying to think of something to be grateful about and it was hard. What I’ve landed on is that as broken as the US is right now, with so much hatred towards one another, towards our leaders, still so many people, so many more people than I thought would, are taking social distancing seriously. And it seems to be working (albeit really really slowly). That is enormously comforting. Despite our many many many problems, we can do hard things to make things better.

You guys. This work-from-home situation is not working for me. The constant interruptions from my kids (especially the preschooler) are too much to handle. I cannot get into anything resembling flow and it is draining me mentally. DH seems to do fine (?) with multitasking childcare and work, but I lack the mental capacity to do it. It is so disruptive. How are you trading off duties with your spouse? Do you set aside your hours vs. his hours? DH wants to make these decisions in the moment or day by day, and that is not working for me. I also may need to move my office location to a room with a locked door, though I have no idea where. The only reasonable option would be our bedroom, which is literally my only sanctuary at the moment.

And oh my G*d, DH has GOT to stop talking to me while I’m trying to work.

I’m over it today. I need my alone time in the mornings for reading, yoga, etc. Kiddo woke up early. I got up and had breakfast with him. Then I woke DH up at their normal wake up time and told them I was going outside to do my yoga video. Kiddo followed me outside and played with chalk paint while I did my yoga video (no idea what DH was doing during this time). When I was finished, Kiddo tried to follow me inside but, of course, was covered in blue chalk paint. I called for DH to get Kiddo’s hands clean and went inside to take a shower. DH grabbed a towel and whisked Kiddo inside… to give Kiddo a bath in the master bathroom.

So, no time to myself this morning. Yoga with Kiddo running around me playing. No shower. I’m grumpy. And I smell. . . not great.

As if the current childcare issues aren’t bad enough, I just found out that the convenient, affordable daycare center that DD1 attended, and where we’ve been on the waitlist since I was 3 months pregnant with DD2 (now 4 weeks old) is not going to be reopening even after our local shutdown order is lifted. They lease space from a school, and the school is not renewing the lease so it can expand into the space. Because we had zero trouble getting off the waitlist last time (and in fact got offered a spot early), we weren’t on any other lists. The center is part of a local chain but the other locations are inconveniently located, and have separate waitlists, so it’s unlikely we’d get a spot by August/September, when I plan to go back to work. We got on another couple of waitlists at other (more expensive, inconveniently located) daycares, but I’m not confident we’ll get a spot – I’m hearing spring 2021.

Given all this, and the fact that we’re planning to move DD2 to the same amazing preschool as DD1 as soon as they’ll take her (fall 2021), I think our best option is hiring a nanny. I’m hoping we could even find someone whose living situation/risk tolerance would allow them to keep coming in the event of further covid-related shutdowns this fall/winter.

So how do I go about doing this? (childcare research is on my side of our very equal division of household labor). When should I start looking for someone? How do I find out what the standard pay/benefits are in my area? Any recommended payroll websites? Is there any way to offer healthcare benefits, and how would that work? Also, would proposing a schedule of 4 10-hour days (8 am – 6 pm 4 days/week) be a selling point, or would it turn off good nanny candidates? (We could cover the 5th day by both working a half day from home, and get the coverage we need for office days without paying a nanny overtime). Any advice is appreciated.

Melissa & Doug toys (and Green Toys) are also available on bookshop.org where you can help out indie bookstores and your stuff will ship in less than a month since you’re not competing with “essential” orders