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Updated: Nov 1, 2018 77 Comments · by

Teething Tuesday: Organic Silicone Teething Necklace

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A woman wearing a Organic Silicone Teething Necklace.If you have an easily distracted baby who keeps pulling away from you while you’re nursing — or you have a baby who likes to pull and gnaw at your jewelry while you’re carrying him or her — or (perhaps) you just enjoy large, chewable jewelry — then do consider a teething necklace. I had two with H — a longer one like this that I wore when he was nursing and fascinated by his older brother’s antics, and a shorter one that I wore when I wore him in our Boba baby carrier. I like the muted colors of this one, and the fact that it’s only $18 and eligible for Prime. Organic Silicone Teething Necklace (L-all)

Sales of note for 9.10.24

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Kid/Family Sales

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  • Old Navy – 40% off everything
  • Target – BOGO 25% off select haircare, up to 25% off floor care items; up to 30% off indoor furniture up to 20% off TVs

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Comments

  1. dc mom anon says

    Clif’s notes on the 2 year old sleep regression, please? I am sleep-deprived, bleary-eyed, and cannot find my Weissbluth book. DD has woken up 1-3 times every night for the last week. She has been an excellent and consistent sleeper for the past year after some CIO. Now she wakes up and is afraid of monsters, asks for food, asks for books, and last night she was so stressed out she couldn’t even speak she just cried and flapped her arms. After giving in to her demands, mainly just to get her to calm down, we ultimately let her CIO and she fell asleep.

    • POSITA says

      Is she getting her 2 year molars? We had to use ibuprofen for a week or two.

      • Anonymous says

        +1

        Teeth are so not fun. Does she have a sleep sheep? We had good luck with just turning on the sleep sheep, telling her to close her eyes and wait for sleepies to come.

    • Anons says

      Try the bedtime pass? http://www.npr.org/sections/health-shots/2015/09/18/441492810/the-bedtime-pass-helps-parents-and-kids-skip-the-sleep-struggles

      Is the door being closed bothering her? Consider a monkey lock or baby gate.

      Also, I recall that Ferber’s book was better on this topic than Weissbluth. I think you are supposed to calm any real fears, but refuse to give in to other stalling tactics (food, books, etc.). If necessary, you can resort to CIO or Ferber checks if the child is unafraid but is trying to otherwise stall going to sleep.

      Also, we love the Tranquil Turtle or the Twilight Turtle. It seems like such a gimmick, but it really seems to help my daughter. Every once in awhile, I hear the music start up on the Tranquil Turtle at 2am and I know she woke up and wanted the light on and to hear some music. She doesn’t bother us (unless she is scared or sick), so that is a win! Link: http://cloudb.com/US/sight/tranquil-turtle-ocean-blue

    • Anons says

      I have a comment stuck in moderation, probably for links, but suggested trying out the bedtime pass (Google it), the Twilight or Tranquil Turtle by cloudB, which my daughter loves and uses at night when she wakes up sometimes, leaving the door open with a monkey lock or baby gate, and not giving in to stalling tactics but comfort her if she is having real fears. I thought Ferber addressed this topic better than Weissbluth. I hope this phase is over for you soon!

      • Anonymous says

        +1 to this. My son now sleeps with a nightlight and we turn that same Turtle on before bed. Helped with him waking up scared at night.

    • Closet Redux says

      We went through a terrible regression at 2.5 yrs seemingly out of nowhere– no teeth, no transitions, no explanation for why our normally peaceful sleeper wouldn’t go to sleep and stay sleeping. For us, it was a rough couple weeks of grinning and bearing it, with no real strategy appearing to help. We would usually go into her room once when she called and respond to whatever request she made– a hug, water, lovey– but only once, and told her we wouldn’t come in again because it was nighttime and we were all sleeping. It seemed like an eternity, but lasted only about 2 weeks and she (and we) are sleeping fine again now.

      If you don’t already use a nightlight, now might be a good time to introduce one. I am also a big fan of the ok to wake clock, though in our circumstance it was clearly separation anxiety and not that she thought it was time to wake up.

  2. jlg says

    FWIW, I had a very similar grey silicone necklace strung on knotted ribbon. Baby wasn’t that interested, but I felt safe wearing it and I’ve never gotten more compliments on a necklace. Like from strangers on the street. No matter what shmata I was wearing it with.

  3. Daycare dilemma says

    If you had to choose between an infant spot in two equally high-quality daycares–one that was literally on your way to work but you have to bring all lunch/snacks once they start eating solids, and one that was a little bit out of the way (potentially adding 10-15 minutes to AM commute) but that provided all food, which would you pick? I recognize that there’s some individual preference here, but as our kid isn’t born yet, I am not yet sure whether getting out the door a few minutes early or getting out the door later but with lunch packed is going to be a bigger hurdle. The prices are the same–more than our monthly mortgage payment, but the same. Thanks!

    • mascot says

      Option 1 for now. IME, we didn’t start eating daycare provided lunches/snacks until age 2+ per the school policy and even then I didn’t love the menu they served.

    • Legally Brunette says

      Option 1. Proximity and ease of going to the daycare is pretty priceless. And although I lamented the fact that the daycare didn’t provide any food, I changed my mind after I visited another daycare and saw the food that they were serving. Very institutional and unappetizing. I would much rather control what my child eats, especially at a young age, even if it is admittedly a hassle packing a lunch every day.

      • CHJ says

        +1 to finding out what food they provide. Our old daycare was a Mandarin immersion daycare, and they contracted with an organic/local catering company that delivered an amazing range of food (everything from fajitas to Cajun to Italian) and then they supplemented that with Chinese food on Chinese holidays. It was unbelievably great. But I think that was a very special exception and not all menus are going to be that good.

          • CHJ says

            Seriously better than my lunches! I would go pick him up after having a sad soggy deli sandwich for lunch, and he would have had blackened chicken with Cajun rice, followed by fresh gingerbread for snack. It was amazing.

      • Wow says

        + This. Visit the daycare and check out the kind of food served before you decide. I went to one that served all organic meals, with most all ingredients bought from Whole Foods. Those kids certanly ate better than me! But I also went to another daycare where the food looked like mush.

        With that said, I’ve always gone for proximity and convenience, which to me trumps everything.

      • Em says

        I would agree with this. My son is 7 months and I actually really enjoy making his food, but I also really enjoy cooking. I’m sure I will enjoy it less when he becomes a picky toddler, but we are moving him to a different daycare at 18 months (because it is much closer so +1 to proximity and convenience) so it’s a moot point.

      • Meg Murry says

        Another +1 to checking out what the provided food actually is. Our daycare does an amazing job of providing good, healthy food options, and I give them tons of credit for my kids being great eaters. However, one year they tried contracting out the food service to the local school system, and the food was mediocre at best (school cafeteria food that had been trucked around town and then re-heated, blech).

        While I love, love, love that our school provides food, I’d probably go for the closer option now, since as others say you won’t really care for at least a year, and things could always change over the course of that year or two and they could stop providing food, whereas the closer one probably isn’t going to pack up and move further away. You could always put yourself on the waiting list for the other and consider switching at 18 months.

        The other factor here for me would be how much your partner would be willing/able to help out. Would they be more likely to be able to help out with the extra 15 minute commute for drop-off, or the extra grocery shopping/food prep/dishes? My husband hates driving more than dishes and cooking, I hate dishes more than driving :-)

        Do both daycares even have spots available for an infant when you need it? This might turn into “put your name on both wait lists and go with whichever has a spot come available”.

      • Two Cents says

        Another issue to consider is whether your (unborn) child will have any allergies. If so, daycare provided food may not be the best. Or in our case, we are vegetarians and I wasn’t satisfied with the veggie option the daycare gave.

        15 minutes of driving can turn into 45 in traffic. I’d definitely do the daycare on your way to work.

    • TK says

      Food is provided at little TK’s daycare. 1 day a month is ‘bring your own lunch’ day, and I dread it like the plague. Preparing toddler size portions and divvying it out into 4 or 5 tiny Tupperware containers that all have to be washed … massive pain.

      Initially this won’t be a big issue for you, obviously, but down the road there is an enormous benefit to school-provided meals. They started giving him food (with our approval, of course) around 8 months. He gets breakfast there, too, on the mornings we’re in a rush.

    • CHJ says

      I love love LOVE daycares that provide all the food, so normally I would say go for that one, but 10-15 minutes per day will add up (especially if that also means 10-15 minutes at the end of the day?). My son is now in a daycare that doesn’t provide food, and it’s fine. It takes me less than 10 minutes to prep his food in the morning.

    • CPA Lady says

      I guess I’m in the minority here, but I would totally pick the one that provides food. That’s probably because I’m not a very creative or inventive person when it comes to food, I hate cooking, and I eat the same mediocre food for lunch every day because of it.

      My kid will eat anything and I chalk that up to daycare almost entirely. My daycare serves a wide variety of healthy, different, and interesting foods. It’s not like they’re eating chicken nuggets or pb&js every day. I agree to check and see what kind of foods they provide and really think about whether or not you would or could do better. I definitely could not do better and I dread the day I have to start packing lunches for my kid. I hope she likes uncrustables.

      • Shayla says

        I am with you–I’d go with the one that provides food. This won’t be an issue really until you’re comfortable giving solids, so before the one year mark but not at three months. You could go to the one where you have to bring food initially, as you’ll be packing bottles (br*astmilk or formula, you’ll have to bring) no matter what. So that may give you a taste for the time it takes cleaning the bottles and prepping them. And you would be able to extrapolate that into a pro/con list of whether you’d rather drive for an extra 20-30 min a day or spend that time prepping food and clean up. Having done both, I’d choose driving.

      • H says

        Has your kid always eaten everything? My LO’s teachers say he eats lunch very well there but he barely touches dinner (and I refuse to short order cook for him aside from maybe offering some fruit which I know he’ll eat). I sometimes wonder if he’s just not very hungry for dinner because, as they say, he eats so well at lunch?

        • Pigpen's Mama says

          My kid is like that – her teachers say she’s VERY enthusiastic about eating and really only refuses salad (which really, you’re giving toddlers salad?), but at home she’s a lot pickier and sticks to a pasta/cheese/fruit diet. I think some of it is not being very hungry, but a good portion of it is peer pressure/the social aspect of eating with other kids.

          Or maybe the school’s caterer is just a better cook! :-D

        • CHJ says

          My son also routinely eats big lunches and small dinners, even on weekends. I think it’s just his hunger cycle.

      • (was) due in june says

        The food my daycare provides is fine. Is it the most interesting, the most varied, totally organic? No, almost certainly, but it’s made on site daily with whole ingredients, with love and is nutritious. I also greatly value the peer pressure of all kids getting the same food and eating it together. I still have to pack her dairy (milk, yogurt) and fruit/veg snacks and that’s already a pain. When I was pregnant, a working mom colleague said that her one piece of totally unsolicited advice was *find a daycare that provides food* and she was SO right. Maybe I’d feel differently if I was working fewer hours, but with my job, I need a daycare that provides food.

        • Anonymous says

          Agree. My oldest just started kindergarten this week and I now have to make her lunch and recess everyday. 100% food providing daycare. It’s not just the time to prepare the food it’s the emotional labor of figuring out what to pack for lunch and snacks each day. I already have to feed them at breakfast and dinner so I enjoy not having to do lunch and snacks as well.

          • RDC says

            Me too. It’s not just the daily packing (and washing), the idea of keeping the house stocked with passably heathy food, providing options, making shopping lists etc is overwhelming to me. I get our groceries delivered every week and can barely manage to scrape together meals to get us through (most) evenings.

      • RR says

        Agreed. Food all the way. It takes way more than 10-15 minutes a day of thought/planning/preparing/washing to send food.

      • MDMom says

        Agree. I love that my daycare provides food! Saves so much mental energy and washing. Our daycare provides decent food, not super healthy organic stuff or frozen reheated mush. It’s made on site and is basic pasta, meatballs, turkey wrap, pizza Fridays. Nothing fancy. But it’s fine by me. You also have the option of sending different /additional food if you want.

    • Momata says

      Option 1. You can’t time-shift the commuting – it has to happen at rush hour regardless of how your day is going, what kind of mood baby is in, etc. You can make food whenever you can squeeze it in, and plus then you are feeding your baby what you feel comfortable with.

    • Momata says

      An alternative to these necklaces: my kids both had the ubiquitous Angel Dear lovies. When they were old enough to have them in the crib with them, I stuck the lovey’s head on one side of my bra strap and let the kid fidget with the blanket part. I think it helped transmit a soothing quality to the lovey which in turn facilitated self-soothing.

  4. Famouscait says

    I walked into my son’s room this morning, and he handed me something from his crib… it was his diaper, and he had peed all over the mattress, stuffed animals, blankets, etc. What is a good resource for figuring out how to potty train? As in, the logistics of when/how/etc.?

    • Another R says

      Not your question but unless access to his diaper was available due to a zipper failure (or other clothing failure), I’d consider using tape. I know dozens of kids who were taped into their diapers but only one who went from sleeping in a crib wearing a diaper to being overnight potty trained in a brief amount of time.

      • Shayla says

        Agreed. My two year old son will do this when I put him in his crib with no bottoms (lazy parenting/hot room). So, I always put bottoms on him because he shows no other signs of wanting to potty train. When my daughter was potty trained I just read a bunch of articles on line and decided on the general 3 day boot camp thing. It worked for her, but I’ve heard boys are harder so I am not looking to rush him into it.

        • Shayla says

          Also, sorry for such a terrible and icky start to the day! It’s the worst!

    • mascot says

      How old is he and what does he do for childcare? We followed daycare’s lead in potty training which started in the 2 year old room but our son didn’t really get it until 2.75 years. Once he was ready though, he trained pretty quickly. Overnight training happens later than daytime training.

  5. CHJ says

    Sad working mom guilt – yesterday at pick-up, my son’s daycare teacher told me that lately, during outdoor play time in the afternoon, he has been sitting on a little hill that overlooks the parking lot crying, asking for me, and asking his teachers when I am going to come pick him up. She said this starts around 3 p.m. And yesterday, two of his little friends sat with him to comfort him. She said this has been going on for a couple of weeks now.

    I feel so, so sad about this! It’s getting close to 3 p.m. now and the thought of him sitting there crying and waiting for me just breaks my heart. The teachers try to comfort him but they said he just cries and cries and won’t play. Any wisdom/advice/been-there stories?

    • CPA Lady says

      How old is he? I’m guessing it’s a phase. Or that’s what I tell myself to make myself feel better. I’m kind of in the same boat. My daughter just turned 2 and she’s been having some rough afternoons and clingy weepy daycare pickups.

      Yesterday after I picked her up and we got home, she asked to go outside. Then she wanted to sit on the front porch with her clinging to me crying while repeatedly requesting I sing “you are my sunshine” to her. It was like she missed me and wanted to cling to me like a barnacle and just had to cry out all her feelings. Once she was done crying, she was totally fine for the rest of the evening, and in a great mood. It was SO sad though. Its hard to sing “you are my sunshine” when you’re choking back your own tears.

      Just like so many other things in parenting, I’m trying to tell myself “this too shall pass”.

      • Edna Mazur says

        What a song to pick. I hold back tears whenever I sing that song. No way could I get through it if I was already emotional. What is it with that song!?!?

      • mascot says

        Holding them while they cry it all out is so hard. My six year had a rough afternoon last week- he’d been good at school, but got in trouble for being jerky to his friends during sports practice. Poor kid just wanted to snuggle up in my lap and cry because he was tired and felt so bad about the whole thing. Within a few minutes though, he worked through his feelings and felt better.
        OP- if this is a pattern, can the teachers come up with a distraction around that time so he doesn’t see the other parents coming in for pick-up. I also think that an additional small snack and something to drink helps them get through the long afternoon.

    • Closet Redux says

      I hate it when daycare tells me this stuff. I mean, YES OBVIOUSLY, I want to know, but also I so don’t want to know.

      My kid often wakes up from her nap crying for me and asks for me all afternoon. Her teacher recommended that we send in a photograph that she can look at whenever she needs to see me. I also sometimes give her a kiss in the palm of her hand to stick in her pocket for when she needs it later (a suggestion I got from this board, which I think comes from a children’s book). The teacher will remind her that she has mama’s kisses in her pocket.

      It makes me so unbelievably sad, but I try to focus on all the wonderful things I am teaching her about women: that we are strong and independent, hard-working, important, capable, and reliable and will always always come back for her. But yes, tears!

      • Jen says

        Oh, I do this with hugs and a stuffed animal at night and it works like a charm. Might work at daycare if stuffed animals are allowed in cubbies?

      • Meg Murry says

        Oh, I feel you on the heart melting/sigh aspect of this. How old is kiddo? Do some of his classmates get picked up at that time? Or did you pick him up then once and now he’s hopeful it will happen again?

        Around 2 my kids started to really get the rhythm of their day/week, especially once they went to classrooms that had “circle time” where they went over days of the week, and had their daily schedule posted. They were comforted to know what to expect, even if they didn’t like it.

        If you usually pick up at the same time (or if you pretty much never pick up before X:00, at least) you could start prepping him for that, and his teachers could use the same language. So, for instance, if there is a schedule posted in the classroom, you (and the teacher) could show him “after nap, you’ll have outdoor play. Then story time in the classroom, and then mommy will pick you up during free choice time.” If he knows not to expect you during outdoor play, maybe he’ll get over it faster and get back to playing?

        But yes, totally feel you – the sooner they learn to express themselves, the sooner they learn to say things that break your heart. But try to remember the opposite too – I know I’ve tried to pick my kids up early more than once as a surprise, only to have them tell me they didn’t want to leave yet because they wanted to keep playing.

        And I’m with Closet Redux that maybe I don’t want to know this stuff – although I suspect my daycare is like yours and would wait until it became a repeating occurrence, and not tell me when it’s just a one-time thing. And I’m way better off not knowing about every single time my kid has cried for me.

    • Famouscait says

      My son is in a separation anxiety phase. There are two good “Llama Llama” books for this – Red Pajamas (the original) and Misses Mama – which is specifically about Llama getting anxious at school. Last night we re-read the pages where “MAMA LLAMA COMES BACK!!!” Hope this helps. =)

      • EB0220 says

        There is a good Daniel Tiger episode on this, too. I am always singing the little ditty “Grownups come back!”.

    • ChiLaw says

      A thing I appreciate about daycare is that they make a point of telling my kiddo that mama is *working* (I know this because kiddo taught me the sign language for “work”)! It sort of deflects away from the abandonment feeling — mama hasn’t just ditched you, she’s doing something. I’ve also taken her to my office, and she sort of knows the people I work with, which makes it maybe less weird for her? Sometimes at drop off she’ll tell me “mama work, office” and name the people I’m going to see there.

      IDK right now I just want to drive over there and hug her, so what do I know.

    • Anonymous says

      How old is your LO? At a certain age it was really helpful to my oldest to talk through what was going to happen. If you can give a short order of things that will happen so he knows when to expect you? Example: First Play, Next Lunch, Then Nap, Then Play Outside, Then Go Play Inside, Then Mommy comes. Five things before you come would be ideal because he can count them on his fingers.

      I do something similar with my 2 year old when I’m rocking him to sleep and he loves it. So it might help him in the evenings know that you know what his life is like. Example “Mommy woke you up in the morning, then we ate breakfast. Mommy and X put our clothes on. Daddy drove you to daycare. X played with his friends at daycare. X ate a yummy lunch. X had a nap. X played outside with his friends but felt sad and missed Mommy. X had a snack. Mommy came to pick up X. Mommy and X drove home. Mommy, Daddy and X ate FOOD for supper. Mommy gave X a bath. Mommy is helping X go to sleep.” Repeat a few times. He nods along enthusiastically at his favourite parts. I always stretch out and emphasize the parts of the day where we spend time together.

    • CHJ says

      Thank you all – this community is the best! He just turned 3, so hopefully talking him through the parts of the day and sending him with photos/loveys/mementos should help. I just feel so bad for the little guy. He is getting so many cuddles this evening, for sure.

    • Anonymous says

      I’m sorry you and your son were both sad, but it sounds lovely that his friends sat with him and consoled him.

  6. Jen says

    How many blowouts is too many blowouts? Trying to decide if I need to buy another pack of size 1s or a pack of size 2s on the wha home today. Baby had a major blow out on Sunday and another today, but has also had a bit of a stomach bug. Not sure if it’s the nature of the poop or the size of the diaper.

    • Edna Mazur says

      My experience it depends on the kid. With my first, we probably had only a half dozen and I wondered what was wrong with all these people whose kids constantly blew out diapers. Then with number two no matter how many size ups and ruffle fluffing I did, we had one at least every other day. I usually buy up when I can but I hate having left-over diapers.

    • RR says

      My rule was always that I sized up as soon as I thought randomly that maybe there was some reason to size up. When in doubt, size up.

    • Another R says

      Whenever I thought I might need to size up, I needed to size up. Regarding leftover diapers though, you can always donate them to a diaper bank or food pantry, and the ones near me accept open packages.

      • SC says

        The Junior League in our area collects diapers at several different locations (their hq, health centers, community centers, and baby stores and indoor playgrounds). They accept open packages, organize, and distribute to the community through various nonprofits. It always makes me feel better about sizing up and having leftover diapers.

    • Anon in NYC says

      I agree that it probably depends on the kid. My kiddo has had a handful of blowouts, and I don’t think any of them were related to the fit of her diaper. But if your kid is close to the weight limit on the size 1s or the size 1s are starting to feel a little tight, just get the size 2s.

    • anon says

      Um, we had wardrobe malfunctions almost daily with my son. He had problems with meconium aspiration at birth and has just been pooping copiously ever since.

    • Jen says

      Thanks! My ODD was in size 1s until she was like 14lbs bc she was long and lean. This one is too, so I think the 1s are just a little too short now vs too tight.

  7. Mom visit says

    Mom: Who cuts this grass?
    Me: the HOA hires someone
    Mom: It’s really long.
    Me: They’ll do it soon.
    Mom: Well when it gets long like this it can mess up the lawnmower. (okay? what am I supposed to do?)

    Mom: It’s too bad you can’t keep your living room cleaner.
    Me: The kids (both under 3) just scatter the toys. Ana (au pair) tries but they just go and dump them out as soon as she puts them away.
    Mom: Well it’s too bad. It looks terrible like this. (uh, thanks)

    Mom: When are you going to walk the dog?
    Me: After the kids are in bed.
    Mom: He needs a walk.
    Me: I know. I’m going to take him, but after the kids are in bed.
    Mom: He’s in this house all day.
    Me: Well, we can only take him when we’re at home. He’s a good boy.
    Mom: He’s not good. He’s bored! (good, so dog guilt on top of mom guilt. awesome.)

    Mom: More cheese? Didn’t the kids eat cheese for breakfast?

    Mom: Are you going to clean that rug some time? It’s so dirty.

    Am I the only one or are all mom visits like this? My husband can’t figure out why they stress me out so much.

    • Anonymous says

      That is awful! “Mom, that’s rude. We’re not rude to each other in this house.” Every. Single. Time.

    • Jen says

      Better yet, my MIL visits my SIL (DH’s sister), then complains to US. “she gave the kids cheese for breakfast and lunch!” “Her rug was so dirty, I wish she’d clean it.” It’s awful. I finally said “what do you say after leaving. Our place?!” And she looked confused, because DH is a saint that can do no wrong.

      • Mom visit says

        Ironically (?) my MIL is amazing and not only never criticizes anything I do, if I say “ugh, sorry the kitchen’s a disaster” she looks at me like I’m crazy and says “you have two small children and work full time — when did you have any time at all today to do dishes?” Then asks if she can watch the kids on Saturday so I can go get a pedicure.

        • Anonymous says

          OMG – so jealous! Can she write a book about how to be an awesome MIL so I can passive aggressively gift it to my MIL?

    • Lurker says

      I don’t have kids yet but my dad frequently comments about other kids in our family or friends kids who do things like you mention above with dumping out the toys. He will say “well, I just MADE my kids do it.” I always think “hmm, I don’t remember being beat or yelled at so how exactly did you MAKE me do it?” I also remember living in a pretty messy house but in my dad’s rose colored glasses, he could make us do anything he wanted.

      • anon says

        They totally forget! I was once complaining to my mother about how my son kept pooping in the tub (that’s me above with the son that is full of you know what), and my mother said, “you NEVER did that.” And I REMEMBER doing it, which means not only did I do it, but I did it when I was way too old for it to be kind of excusable.

    • ChiLaw says

      OH MY GOD. That sounds so stressful. My MIL is like this, but not explicitly negative, just … lots and lots of “observations.”

      “Kiddo is really upset.” [remains seated on sofa]
      “Aw, kiddo wants more water.” [remains seated on sofa]
      “Oh, we’re having lentils for dinner?” [suppresses horrified cringe]

      Thanks for the input. If you have a problem with how I’m doing this, PLESE don’t let me stop you from doing it yourself.

    • ER says

      I’m sure you are not the only one, but I can assure you that not all mom visits are like this. Address it head on, maybe being more direct each time. “That’s pretty critical. We’re doing the best we can here.” “That’s not helpful.” “It would make your visits easier if you could keep your criticism to yourself, mom.”

    • anon says

      No, you’re mother is being rude. My mother drives me nuts, but in different ways. I would follow-up with, you’re right Mom, we really could use an extra pair of hands. I would love your help — feel free to clean up the toys/walk the dog/make something non-cheese for the kids to eat/mow the grass (so the lawnmower someone else owns doesn’t get messedup?!) (And in fairness, I say that I would do this but probably would not have the guts, so my sympathies to you!)

    • CPA Lady says

      Are you my sister?

      A recent visit from my mom:

      Mom: Honey, I like your new bath mat.
      Me: *incredulous at the compliment* Thank you!
      Mom: Because that old one you had looked absolutely awful.

      That about sums it up. Even when there’s a compliment it’s back handed. But I know that she honestly does not understand how she comes across. She is just SHOCKED when I get upset and doesn’t understand why I’m so sensitive when she’s just “trying to help”. Sigh. Good times.

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