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The house my family moved into late last year has two cabinets with lazy susans inside. At first, I wasn’t crazy about them, but now I am totally converted. They help make the most of the corner space of the kitchen that would otherwise be unusable. I have also seen them used in many organizing projects, both in the kitchen and office/craft rooms. This is a small version that you can use within a regular cabinet or even on your countertop. It seems like an affordable way to maximize your organization and space. It’s $12.99 at Amazon. Two-Tier Lazy Susan
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Sales of note for 9.10.24
(See all of the latest workwear sales at Corporette!)
- Ann Taylor – 30% off your purchase
- Banana Republic Factory – Up to 50% off everything + extra 20% off
- Boden – 15% off new styles
- Eloquii – $29 and up select styles; up to 50% off everything else
- J.Crew – Up to 50% off wear-to-work styles; extra 30% off sale styles
- J.Crew Factory – 40-60% off everything; extra 60% off clearance
- Lands’ End – 30% off full-price styles
- Loft – Extra 40% off sale styles
- Talbots – BOGO 50% everything, includes markdowns
- Zappos – 26,000+ women’s sale items! (check out these reader-favorite workwear brands on sale, and some of our favorite kids’ shoe brands on sale)
Kid/Family Sales
- Carter’s – Birthday sale, 40-50% off & extra 20% off select styles
- Hanna Andersson – Up to 50% off all baby; up to 40% off all Halloween
- J.Crew Crewcuts – Extra 30% off sale styles
- Old Navy – 40% off everything
- Target – BOGO 25% off select haircare, up to 25% off floor care items; up to 30% off indoor furniture up to 20% off TVs
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And — here are some of our latest threadjacks of interest – working mom questions asked by the commenters!
- The concept of “backup care” is so stupid…
- I need tips on managing employees in BigLaw who have to leave for daycare pickup…
- I’m thinking of leaning out to spend more time with my family – how can I find the perfect job for that?
- I’m now a SAHM and my husband needs to step up…
- How can I change my thinking to better recognize some of my husband’s contributions as important, like organizing the shed?
- What are your tips to having a good weekend with kids, especially with little kids? Do you have a set routine or plan?
Worried says
Trying to crowdsource some ideas for my 5yo son to cope with social distancing. He’s much more of an extrovert than I am, is pretty bright and typically very happy, but yesterday was so tough and I’m becoming worried about him. We’ve had several high-level conversations over the past few weeks about why we can’t have play dates or go to school, so it’s not like we’re hiding anything age-appropriate from him.
Yesterday, he asked me to pull up a social distancing video story on YouTube his teacher assigned earlier in the week (I think it’s called “Time to Come In, Bear”). When it got to the part about no playdates for now, he paused the video and said “mom, this is why I’m sad,” and started sobbing. He has never cried like this before. I held it together the best I could but I lost it, too. I think his feeling sad was triggered by seeing one of his classmates on a walk we took the day before — we ended up chatting with their family for about 30 minutes while standing 15 feet apart and it was obvious my son relished that interaction.
Anyone have any ideas or resources to help my son cope? We had a decent conversation right then to acknowledge feeling sad. FaceTiming and zoom chats with friends seem to make him more upset than happy.
I know in my heart that kids are resilient and he will be okay coming out on the other side of this, but in this moment I am absolutely crushed with how difficult this entire episode is for him, especially with the expectation that it’s going to be announced soon that schools will be closed for the rest of this academic year.
AIMS says
I think you’re probably doing more to help than you realize! Just acknowledging his feelings is so huge! If you’re not already try to make a schedule for him – routine is very helpful for managing stress. It’s not the same but I remember being in the hospital after both my deliveries and really looking forward to anything structured, even the bad hospital food.
I also think it’s a good time to introduce new things to make the experience more fun. I gave my 4 year old some more ‘jobs’ because we are all home now so she needs to help and she loves it. So now I ask her to help me cook by stirring things and she has to hand out napkins at mealtime, i addition to feeding the dog (her old job).
We also started trying to do family movie time on Disney and we have ice cream after dinner because I’m trying to make her see some perks to all this stuff.
This article has some more ideas: https://www.lancastergeneralhealth.org/health-hub-home/2020/march/how-to-help-kids-with-social-distancing
You can probably find more online if you google the subject.
Anon says
I’m dealing with the same with my 4yo and 7yo. They’re both struggling mightily without seeing their friends (and one had her first slumber party birthday party cancel for this weekend, which she’d planned for a YEAR). Some days it comes out in sobs, other days it comes out in bad behavior and poor choices. A couple things I’m trying, although with varied success
– Acknowledge their feelings and talk openly about how everyone is “freaking out” right now because this is hard for everyone
– Talk about the times when I’m sad about missing my friends or events
– Focus on the helpers, and the good stories about people making good choices even in hard times
– Sign them both up for FB Messenger for Kids, and have two half hour slots each day where they can call whichever friends are around to chat. No more than 3 total kids to keep it manageable, and sometimes they just sit there and use the filters on each other, but who cares.
– Mailing pictures back and forth to school friends, cousins, grandparents, etc. We literally have several letters going out the door every single day. (Getting a picture in the mail has been a huge highlight.)
– Going by friends’ houses on our morning walks and chalking hello messages. Some have returned the favor which is a huge grin and surprise.
– Organizing reading messenger sessions, where a friend (or friend’s parent) will read a book to the others on the call and then the kids get to talk about it for a few minutes. They love hearing books their friends have picked out.
– Painting found rocks, and then putting them along the sidewalk in the yards of their friends. No touching other rocks. They like to go out to our “rock” section of the yard and seeing the new designs and speculating who it’s from. (And then talking about it to friends on messenger.) A few more have popped up so I think it’s catching on with random people in our neighborhood too.
Nothing is great, but added all together it’s helping a bit. Some days are hard though, even for me. I just keep repeating that somehow we’ll all get through this together!
daycare for May says
I’ve been reading with interest the ongoing discussions about paying for daycare as this stretches on. Ours have asked us to continue paying, as they are still thankfully able to pay teachers. As this seems like it will stretch until the end of May at the earliest, are you all paying for May as well?
Thanks
Cb says
We got an email saying that we wouldn’t be charged from 20 March (closure date) until they reopened. But it’s a council nursery and I think the staff is being furloughed and thus eligible for unemployment. Some will be redeployed to other sites to provide childcare for essential workers.
Anonymous says
Nope. I’ve said this before but I cannot provide a social safety net to my daycare. They are going to have to lay-off workers and they’ll have to apply for unemployment. I’m not paying April.
Anon says
are you guaranteed a spot for when they reopen? i know daycares have really small margins, but i think that if they are clsoed and are asking people to pay, they should at least be asking them to pay a bit less
Anonymous says
We pay, but our daycare in open. We’re in a state where it is “essential”. Our kiddo hasn’t gone in a few weeks and probably won’t go for another month. We’re okay with it because we’re both still working and making our typical salaries, we’re in a small town so the cost isn’t as high as many places, and they’re really good to their staff. At least partially because we’re in a small town, the staff doesn’t have turnover, are nearly all mothers providing for their families, and everyone really cares and tries so hard (owners and staff included). If it was closed, I’d feel differently.
anonomo. says
I really appreciate all of these responses. I’m so torn and continue to pay.
Anon says
Our daycare isn’t asking for May tuition, which I’m grateful for, because we can’t really afford it right now. Our daycare is church-affiliated, though, which means the teachers are doomed because they can’t apply for unemployment.
Redux says
Why can’t they apply for unemployment? (revealing my ignorance about this law)
Anon says
Apparently religious organizations can choose to be exempt from paying unemployment taxes, which means their employees can’t collect unemployment. So basically the teachers are screwed over because of a decision the diocese made (and since I had never heard of this law, I’m sure it didn’t occur to any of them to check things like this before taking the job).
Redux says
ah, yes, that makes sense. ugh, so unfair to those employees.
Coach Laura says
But “gig” workers like Uber/lyft drivers and people like that are allowed to get unemployment during this pandemic, so I don’t know why daycare workers wouldn’t similarly be allowed to apply. It does vary by state but someone should check for those workers.
Anonymous says
Oh you mean the church isn’t going to provide? Shocking.
Anon says
tangentially related – is anyone a bit nervous about sending their kid back to daycare/preschool when they reopen until we have a vaccine? i’m usually not such an anxious person and try to trust authorities about these things, but given how long certain cities/states/federal government has taken to respond to this pandemic, i feel like they might open things back up somewhat prematurely and daycares are an excellent plays for germ transmission. yesterday an infant in CT died from Covid and it just makes me kind of nervous
Anon says
No. The infant death is tragic but children are still extremely low risk for this. A vaccine is at a minimum 1.5 years away and possibly MUCH more than that. It is wildly unrealistic to keep children home from school and daycare until we have a vaccine.
Boston Legal Eagle says
Same here. I would be more inclined to keep WFH myself while sending my kids to daycare. First off, we can’t do this work/parent thing simultaneously for 18 months. Just can’t. Not to mention those workers who truly can’t do both because of no WFH option. Second, there are more germs at daycare, but they do their best to sanitize daily, and if the kids get Covid, statistically they are less likely to get the worst symptoms. I hope tests become more readily available so that we’ll know if the kids catch it and can then quarantine them for 2 weeks.
Anon says
+1
anon says
I am on the fence. A six week old baby just died in my area so it’s not like the young are immune. I also would not want my kiddo to spread it to grandparents after getting it from school.
I would love more testing for antibodies. Some of us could have already had it without realizing it.
Anon says
No. Honestly, I kind of want my family to get it while we are low risk so we will have immunity for the next waves of this. I don’t want to get it right now while the hospitals are floundering, but I live near NYC and assume most of us will probably end up getting it. I also don’t think I would get a vaccine that has barely any long-term safety data (and I am very pro-vaccine, get the flu shot every year, and am glad that one will hopefully be available for those at high risk).
Anon says
Adding, I don’t mean to sound cavalier – I realize this is a serious illness. But this is a rock and a hard place situation. Hopefully new treatment methods crop up soon, too.
Anonymous says
Omg omg you’re out of your mind bananas. Not get a vaccine when it comes out? I will camp on the streets for it. When they came out with a polio vaccine people were not waiting for long term data they got it the second they could and were grateful. People in their 30s and 40s with no health issues ARE DYING. No you don’t hope you get it now you absolute idiot.
Anon says
Polio was around for decades and the vaccine was tested for more than 18 months before going on the market…honestly it’s probably a moot point, this is going to come and go and I’ll bet most of us will be exposed before a vaccine comes on the market. But thanks for the name calling! And yes I have close relatives who have had this in the last couple weeks. I’m not saying it’s not serious; I’m saying there are risk benefit analyses to everything, especially things that are rushed to market without appropriate safety data.
Anon says
People in their 30s with no health issues also die of the flu. The risk of death (regardless of health conditions) for a 30-something is almost identical for COVID-19 and flu. It’s over age 50 and especially over 70 where the Covid and flu death rates diverge significantly.
avocado says
I am as pro-vaccine as they come, and even I am concerned about a rush to administer a vaccine without adequate testing, especially since at least some of the vaccines under consideration here use entirely new technology. The issue is that some vaccines can actually worsen the illness rather than preventing it. This happened with a SARS vaccine candidate, on which one of the current COVID vaccine candidates is based.
Anon says
Yes, exactly what avocado said. There’s increasing evidence the vaccine will be rushed through and may not be fully safe. Normally you need to follow test subjects for at least a year to prove vaccine safety. With the 18 month timeline, they won’t have time to do that. I am super pro vaccine and we always get flu shots, but I will probably not get this one right away. My nuclear family is low risk and I will need to wait and see but at this point I’m thinking the vaccine risks outweigh the benefits unless we have plans to spend time with older grandparents.
It isn’t crazy to vaccinate only older/high risk people in the beginning. It’s been done with other illnesses including swine flu.
Anon says
my kid has asthma so i am nervous. we also don’t yet know how/if the virus might mutate and whether if you had it already you will definitely be immune
Anon says
Not to be pedantic, but we don’t know that an infant died “from Covid.” An infant died and subsequently tested positive for Covid. Those are very different statements. Experts estimate that more than a million people in the US may have probably Covid now, which means some small percent of the babies dying of SIDS and other causes will test positive. You need an autopsy to prove Covid caused the death.
Anon says
This is a good point, though isn’t SIDS just an infant death without a known cause? So maybe we won’t ever be able to know.
Anon says
Fair enough. I think they might know from a lung autopsy because, at least in adults, Covid causes a pretty distinctive kind of lung damage. But perhaps it kills younger people differently. I’m not a medical doctor.
Anon says
Oh, that sounds right to me actually. (Not a doctor either.)
Anonymous says
I am not sure. I am in Virginia. If a daycare follows certain guidelines, it may remain open. My daycare has chose to remain open and expects families to continue to pay. I know the facility is at nowhere near the reduced capacity that is permitted by the Governor’s order.
My child starts kindergarten in the fall (hopefully). With a stay at home order until June 10, we have no intent to use daycare until at least then. We have considered providing notice to the daycare. If we return to work after the stay at home order is lifted, we probably could cobble together babysitters or camps until school starts.
Redux says
Yeah, I wouldn’t bank on camps.
anne-on says
Sadly (for my sanity) I think you’re right that camps aren’t going to happen this year.
anon says
This is not my situation, but I will add my two cents anyway. I would not continue to pay the daycare and would be willing to lose the spot. I work for a small firm and I could get laid off. If I’m laid off (just like millions of other people) I have no idea how long it would take me to get another job where childcare would be necessary. Again, just my two cents.
Anonymous says
Exactly
AnotherAnon says
This is an interesting perspective. I am basically taking the opposite position: I am paying because if I don’t my day care will close (they politely emailed the 16 families who attend to inform them of this fact). If I don’t have child care, I cannot work. If I get laid off (which seems likely), I will inform day care of my situation and stay home with my kid. I realize that I am in a very privileged position to have this option. I totally don’t think your perspective is wrong, just wanted to offer my two cents as well.
Anonymous says
I’m in agreement here. I am in a lucky situation where both me and my husband are unlikely to get laid off. I want daycare to resume as normal when possible so I will keep paying.
I also am ok with providing a social net of sorts for the staff if we can.
Anon says
Our daycare stopped charging tuition when they closed in mid-March. I’m anticipating a layoff so definitely can’t afford to be paying full tuition, but I’d be happy to contribute something (maybe up to 1/2 tuition?) if they told us that was the only way to pay teachers or stay in business. They are run by a university, and I’m hoping the university is basically bailing them out. The university president has guaranteed all staff jobs (including childcare workers) until the end of the fiscal year (June 30) so I’m hoping that if things get back to normal by July-ish they’ll be ok.
AnotherAnon says
I think I might get my kid a camera. Any ones you love? He’s three but not wild or destructive, just obsessed with taking photos with my phone.
Anonymous says
Kiddo got a fairly inexpensive one ($35ish) from Grandma and Grandpa off of Amazon for Christmas and loves it. It plugs in like a phone to recharge. Sometimes it feels like the battery doesn’t last long, but I think she leaves it on a bunch when she isn’t using it and it actually lasts a reasonable time. In any event, I’m glad we’re not putting real batteries in it!
Anon says
No personal experience, but I’ve heard good things about the VTech KidiZoom one.
anne-on says
We have an old Vtech one and my 8-yr old loves it. Just an FYI if you monitor screen time – a few of them have simple ‘games’ on them (think 8-bit pong style). I heard a lot of beeping and booping one day and came in to find him playing a game on the camera after he exhausted his allocated screen time for the day so we had to have a chat about that.
JTM says
We got our 3yo the Instamax camera for Christmas and she loves it. Buying film is a pain tho.
cheese says
After much research: nikon coolpix w100, used on ebay
This was for a 5 year old rather than 3 year old, but seemed far more useful and durable vs a kids camera.
Anon says
I have an anti-rec…RegeMoudal Kids Camera. It had great reviews on A-zon, but I hate it. The battery lasts for about 15 minutes, it has a million small buttons that are hard for a toddler to push, and the interface is not intuitive at all (I still can’t figure out how to display the recent photos on the screen). Some of the buttons that kids inevitably push by accident add weird filters or effects on the photos, which annoys my kid (and me). It’s a garbage camera.
anon says
We just gave my 6 year old one of our old phones. No data plan or anything – he just take pictures and we can save the few (very few) good ones onto a computer.
Patricia Gardiner says
How early could you feel kicks with #2 (or more)? With #1 I first felt movement at 16 weeks, but I’m now 12 weeks and I swear I’m feeling little kicks. It seems way too early! But it is a bright spot now so I’ll pretend it’s real.
Anon says
I felt movement with my first around 13 weeks!
Nelly Yuki says
Ideas to engage a 5-year old over video chat? He’s my nephew and I miss him but calls with him, his 2.5 yo brother, and my sister are basically 3 minutes of mayhem.
Anon says
Can you pick a story to read to them? Something funny like Mo Willems?
Anon says
can you chat with the 5 year old separately from the 2.5 year old?
Anonymous says
Read to him – try one on one with each kid. At 5 he’s old enough to hold the phone or iPad while you read to him. Also try using messenger for kids so you can interact by sending each other funny stickers
Realist says
Marco Polo app. Sister can catch them at good moments. Conversations won’t happen in real time, though.
AnotherAnon says
I found out about MP two days ago and honestly it is helping me get through this tough time. My friends made a group chat and we each weigh in with the workout we are doing and what we’re cooking for dinner. It makes me feel less alone and more normal.
anon says
My nephew loves silly jokes. The ones he makes up are largely unintelligible, but he is so thrilled when I laugh. Favorites are the interrupting cow/chicken/pig/pirate knock-knock jokes; what do you call cheese that doesn’t belong to you? nacho cheese!; how do you get a squirrel to like you? act like a nut; and the boo who, don’t cry it’s only a joke knock-knock joke.
Couples Therapy says
I’m new to therapy. DH and I need counseling. I’ve pinged three people on psychology today since last night but no luck with accepting new patients. Any other ideas or do I just keep at it? Do I need to see my own therapist separate and apart from the couples? DH has his own, and has for a long time for unrelated things but it’s been productive all around.
Anon says
I don’t think you also need therapy on your own. My husband and I had success with couples therapy and I did not do additional therapist sessions on my own. It might be dependent on what your issues are though.
OP says
He’s lying to me about a sort of (?) innocuous habit. The habit is sort of controversial but also legal – think like legal gun use or legal marijuana use or legal gambling, none in excess/personally harmful ways as far as I’m aware. Sorry for being vague but I need to be for now.
It’s a habit I hated early but knew it was a price of admission early on (been together almost 15 years). I’ve evolved on the topic and we agreed he’d be transparent about said habit, I’d accept him with this habit but I just want honesty around it. That said, he’s a terrible liar (which he knows) and I’m catching him lying and sneaking around in order to practice said habit. We’ll go 9-12 months with honesty, and then I start to notice things, then I ask directly if he’s been engaging in said habit, he says no, and then eventually says yes, and then we have a big fight (my issue is the dishonesty, not the habit), it passes and then we’re good for another 6-12 months. And then it cycles again… which is becoming a damaging and exhausting cycle.
Married 8 years. We’re very in love, amazing relationship otherwise. We have a toddler. Need to figure out communication and figure out why the lying is happening (maybe I’m not presenting as actually being open to discussion about it? he doesn’t trust me when I say I’m ok with the habit?) or maybe there’s something else on his end I can’t see. It’s literally the only thing we legitimately fight about.
Does that change your response?
Anon says
So, I am in no way an expert at all, but if your issues were along the lines of him being verbally or physically abusive, him cheating, or anything along those lines where your own self esteem or self worth is subsequently on shaky ground, that is when I would say you should probably definitely also go to therapy on your own. Or if he was reluctant/refusing to go with you, or gaslighting you in the sessions, individual therapy would probably also be important.
It sounds like you two have a mutually acknowledged source of contention and communication on both ends is really the issue (him lying; and how you can relay to him that it’s fine if he tells you so that he believes you) in which case that kind of sounds like couples should be good enough to me, at least at first.
While I don’t disagree with the poster below that individual therapy would probably also in theory be great, I also want to acknowledge that we don’t all have unlimited time and resources as we need and you do need to prioritize. I personally also have just struggled finding individual therapy successful at all whereas I did find our couples therapy very helpful, so maybe I’m showing some personal bias here.
Not to make light of this, but I’m dying to know what this hobby is now! (No, I’m not trying to get you to say, I wouldn’t either).
AnotherAnon says
When we moved I looked for therapists using PT’s web site. I think I pinged five people before I got one response. So my advice is to keep trying. Good luck!
Anonymous says
Can he ask his therapist for a recommendation?
DLC says
It is frustrating, but when my husband was seeking therapy, he made many many many phone calls before he found someone who took our insurance and had openings. Most people didn’t even call him back. But when he found a therapist he liked it was so helpful.
I do suggest going alone as well as together. Even if you don’t think you have anything you need addressed; it’s helpful to have an objective view on your take of things and how you are reacting, independent of how you work on those issues with your spouse.
anne-on says
This was on the main page but wanted to share it here – NASA has a site up with proper curriculum up for 10-week lesson plans on earth science. Full lesson plans for languages and science (with slides/activities/quizzes) are like GOLD among my parent group as our teachers are still in the send a link to watch a video and do a worksheet phase. Hope this is helpful for some of you as well!
https://gpm.nasa.gov/education/lesson-plans/survivor-earth
If anyone has lesson plans for Spanish please share! I’m now the 2nd grade Spanish teacher and we’re working on vocab words/greetings/common phrases/conjugations, but grammar is beyond my ability to teach…
Cb says
Oh that’s so good! I’ve sent it to my friends with older kids.
Anonymous says
Can anyone recommend a baby monitor with great range? We have a monitor (Arlo) but I’m not happy with it as it’s failed a couple times. I was thinking maybe an old-fashioned one is the way to go but we live in a concrete house and sometimes have signal troubles inside.
Anonymous says
I live in a three story brick townhouse. I can see our child (on the top floor) while sitting on my patio using my Infant Optics DX-R 8.
Anon says
+1 for the Infant Optics. Ours worked well in a 3,000 sq. foot one story house with living/bedrooms on complete ends of the house and in our 2,500 square foot two-story as well. Plus, I like that it’s not wifi-enabled.
Anon says
We have the Arlo too, and I used a $20 vtech old school audio only one as the one I slept with. I will say the Arlo has gotten much more reliable once we upgraded our routers, so I think it was an internet issue rather than an Arlo issue.
Pay cut says
My company just announced 30-50% pay cuts across the board. The company hopes to make these pay cuts short-term, but they don’t know how long the crisis will last. I have yet to learn what my pay cut will be. They want everyone to keep working full hours for less pay, but it sounds like you can talk to your manager to ask to be furloughed, work fewer hours, and apply for unemployment to make up some of the difference. I don’t know what to do and what the repercussions may be. Thoughts?
Pay cut says
I’ll add that my husband also has reduced hours, and I don’t know how long his job will be intact. It’s amazing how fast things can change.
Anon says
what industry are you in? I’m assuming a company talked to an employment lawyer before announcing this, but i did not realize it was legal
Anonymous says
Yes it is legal. Your employer can cut your pay as long as it doesn’t fall below minimum wage if you are an at will employee.
Anon says
Why would it not be legal? If they can lay you off (pay you nothing) why couldn’t they pay you less? If you have an employment contract for a set period of time, then of course it’s different. But the vast majority of people in the US are at will employees.
Anonymous says
The repercussions of taking a furlough will be unemployment. You will be the first to get fired. Keep your job. Give it the bare minimum. Hold on.
Pay cut says
Have you seen this pattern before? Just wondering what assumptions you are working from. I appreciate your point of view and anyone else who can share.
Anonymous says
I’m an employment lawyer and this is what I see clients doing and it’s also common sense. The economy is collapsing. A furlough is just prolonging the end. They are going to fire people who have been working so they can bring back people who haven’t.
Anonymous says
*arent.
Pay cut says
Thank you!
Anon says
This happened to my sister this week – pay cut from 80K to 45K in a HCOL area. She took the pay cut because it was better to have a job than not (but also started brushing up on her resume – given the industry this is a gross overreaction by her (admittedly reactionary) management, and there has been no discernible slowdown in business so she will be doing the jobs of three people (since they furloughed everyone else with her skill set) for close to half pay). Tough spot to be in, but it’s a small company. Also worth checking the unemployment laws for your state with the new federal law – I thought I read somewhere that you can file for salary reduction, but it’s state to state dependent.
Anonymous says
I am thisclose to quitting my job. My job and my family both need/expect more out of me than I can give, and my job is winning and I hate it. That is all, I just need to vent.
For all the exec platitudes about understanding that this sucks for everyone and no one can be fully productive, there is zero adjustment in expectations, and I am so !@#($*& done.
Yes, I realize I’m extremely fortunate in the grand scheme of things, but knowing that is not changing the fact that I am at the end of my rope.
Anonymous says
Threading fail, because of course today.
FVNC says
+1. I’m not contemplating quitting but I am so SICK of the platitudes about how we’re coming together as a team to continue to produce great work for our clients, without ANY top-down acknowledgement that optimal productivity is just not possible for a huge percentage of employees right now. I love working for my company and am proud of their response but FFS, an adjustment in expectations would be far more helpful than another “rah rah” video of our exec team.
Boston Legal Eagle says
+1000. Just some acknowledgement that a large portion of us are now also doing childcare on top of work would be nice.
Anon says
Help – what can I do for a raw nipple? I had what I assume was a milk blister at the base of my nipple. It was painful when nursing yesterday. Now it seems to have popped and the skin is red and raw. It hurts like heck to nurse or pump. FWIW, baby is 8 months and a good nurser so this is out of the blue.
Knope says
Ouch, sorry. Call a lactation consultant or OB and get a prescription for APNO cream.
Pogo says
+1 I’d try to talk to someone. When my milk blisters burst, it felt AMAZING. It did not really hurt after – even when I had to lance one stubborn one with a sterilized needle. I’d want to be sure you don’t have thrush on top of it or some other complication. Otherwise, b-milk itself has antibacterial properties and keeping it generally clean and dry w/ a little lanolin maybe should help in a day or so. I’d say I felt a little discomfort when LO nursed – like, I could feel more of a “pull” which was at the spot of the blister – but I usually had some clogs behind mine too and I think it was the baby sucking the clog out. Not painful. Hugs, what an awful time to have this!
anon says
let it get as much air as possible, if it’s not convenient to just be topless, Medela sells a product called softshells that are like covers to keep clothing from touching them. Maybe see if a larger flange would make pumping less painful?
anne-on says
If you have any blister bandaids they also work really well on sensitive skin/open sores on other parts of the body – that might help – plus they’re waterproof so they stay on very well despite friction/sweat/water.
Anonymous says
Ouch!
Air as much as possible. I assume you have some lanolin? If you have / can get some polysporin (NOT neosporin), put a teensy tiny bit on right after nursing, then slather with lanolin. By the time you need to nurse again, the polysporin is gone although if you’ve really slathered on the lanolin you may need to wipe a bit off. This really helped me get through months of sore/cracked nipples.
Patent pending says
Two questions for the wise ladies here: I’m due in mid July with twins, my firsts.
1. Any recs for online birth/baby care classes? Everything in person is cancelled and I need to learn!
2. When would you start acquiring baby gear? So far I’ve ordered car seats and they are taking 6 weeks to arrive from amazon. Should I start ordering diapers and wipes etc in May?
Thank you!
Anon says
Congrats!
1. I wouldn’t worry about classes. I didn’t get anything out of the classes I attended. I would read a book or two (I liked Heading Home with Your Newborn) but assuming you’re delivering in a hospital or birth center, they will teach you everything you need to know.
2. Yeah, I would start ordering ASAP. We’re having a very hard time finding toddler diapers (I think infant is easier) in our area/online and I expect Amazon and other stores to continue delaying the shipment of “non-essential” items (and I’m not sure baby gear is essential). Other than carseats and diapers, the biggest thing you need to have before they come home is a safe sleep surface (crib, bassinet, pack-n-play).
SC says
+1 to Heading Home With Your Newborn.
I would go ahead and order baby gear, diapers, wipes, etc that you may need for the first 2 months or so. In addition to Anon’s list, I would have on hand a couple different bottles, some ready-to-feed formula, a pump (look into your options for renting a hospital-grade pump), and milk storage bags. Even if you intend to exclusively breastfeed, there may be bumps in the road. I had a few weeks of nursing attempt + pumping/bottle feeding, with a little bit of formula to supplement while we were ramping up.
Also, I found it helpful to have some personal care items–the Tuck’s witch hazel pads, a peri squirt bottle (some hospitals provide these, but mine didn’t), lanolin, cool packs.
Anon says
FWIW I delivered at 40+4 and DD used infant size diapers for one week. If you deliver early with twins that might not come in to play as much, but size is something to consider when you begin stocking up.
Anon says
fellow twin mom.
1) have some of these things that are canceled switched to online options? in my area, i’ve seen that the typical motherhood/maternity type of places are offering remote classes. There is a place called The Motherhood Center based in Houston that is offering online classes, and still offering breast pump rental if needed. You do not need to live in Houston to take the classes
2) For baby gear like carseats the reason they are taking so long is that Amazon has said they are taking longer to ship non essential items. again, look to your local stores. the one near me is hosting virtual consultations for car seats, cribs, strollers, etc. and then will ship you the items. The store local to me is Baby’s & Kids 1st, but you do not have to actually live in Houston to use them (look at their facebook page) You will be able to steal some diapers from the hospital, but since twins do sometimes come early there is no harm in ordering some diapers/wipes to have on hand. There was a thread about diapers yesterday or the day before, I generally use Target diapers for daytime and Huggies for nighttime, but right now cannot get the Target ones without going into the store.
anonn says
BirthBootCamp has an online option. I did the live and loved it, but a lot of it was videos so I think the online would be great too. It looks like you can buy just the new born and bf class separately, and there’s a 7 day refund policy. the bootcamp/military theme is a super cheesy, but the content was awesome.
Anonymous says
Hypnobabies is also a complete course online if you’re into that sort of prep.
CHL says
I asked my midwife about hypnobabies and she referred me to Rachel Yellin who has audio hypnosis things. I did it for a couple months before birth and I had a 10 lb baby with no drugs… causation, correlation?
Anonymous says
I liked this birth class: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j7YucfJuziU
anon says
I have July twins! The baby care classes aren’t essential. We didn’t do any. The nurse at the hospital made sure my husband and I each knew how to feed, change, and bathe the babies before we left. Closer to delivery, read “The Happiest Baby on the Block” and forget everything else you read that isn’t about twins. Single-baby parents think they know, but they don’t, and it’s easier if you just tune it all out IMHO.
+1 on the bottles of formula even if you plan to exclusively BF–we ended up running to a drug store for formula after our twins started losing weight too quick after 2 days home from the hospital. There’s no harm in getting some diapers and wipes, you will need them eventually. You will need approximately nine million burp cloths, so stock up on those–the most efficient are the plain unfolded cloth diapers because they’re very absorbent. Starting day 1, you also will need some kind of “baby repository” for each floor of your home because you will need somewhere to put Twin B down when Twin A is feeding or getting changed or whatever. That can be a crib/pack n play or bouncer or dock a tot or, you know, a mat on the floor.
Take care of yourself!
Anon says
I have 3 year old twin girls – +1 to everything above. Especially ignore advice not geared directly to caring for infant twins. It’s nothing like caring for singletons. If you haven’t found a twin parent online community I would seek one out – they were especially helpful when I was trying to figure out feeding/sleeping schedules early on and a great resource for figuring out the logistics of managing two infants at the same time. Good luck!
Anon Lawyer says
Day 2 “back” from maternity leave and it’s already kind of awful. Despite six weeks of exclusive pumping before I could get her to latch and periodic bottles after that my 4.5 month old now refuses to take any bottle and screams when anyone tries. And she must be going through a growth spurt because she is eating for a significant length of time every two hours. So though my mom is helping with child care, getting into work mode is basically impossible.
Anonymous says
I had exactly the same fact pattern re. feeding: 6 weeks of EP before baby would latch, then returned to work at 4.5 months and baby refused the bottle. What worked for us at that point was the Nuby sippy cup with the soft silicone spout. Maybe it worked because the shape was different enough from the real thing that baby didn’t think someone was trying to dupe her. Who knows.
Anon Lawyer says
Thanks! I have a box of hand me down sipping cups I’ll pull out to try.
anon says
Sorry to hear this! My younger two refused to drink from a bottle unless desperate (like I was gone for 3 days). They basically ate cereal mixed with milk at school (I started solids early because of this, around 5 months) and then reverse-cycled. It was really annoying, but they both switched to sippies early!
Boston Legal Eagle says
This is a frivolous question in these times but with spring coming, what brand rain boots do you like for your kids? We got some Bogs for winter boots, but they seem too big for warm rainy days.
CHL says
We actually like our Crocs boots -I didn’t know it was a thing but they’re really lightweight
Anonymous says
Lone Cone have been both affordable and held up really well.
AnotherAnon says
+1 I love my kid’s Lone Cones, plus they’re a small business.
Beth @ Parent Lightly says
I have never heard of this brand but I love the name.
Anon says
Totes Cirrus Brand (at target). We’re on our third pair (sizing up, not wear related). So much lighter.
Beth @ Parent Lightly says
We have Kamik and Duck Boots and they are both good.
Zoombinis says
Does anyone remember the Logical Journey of Zoombinis? I loved it as a 2nd-4th grader in the 90s. It was the only game that my mom would let me play on our family computer, and it looks like the same version is on the Google Play mobile appstore now!
I downloaded it on my phone and it’s a tad too small since I’m squinting to look at the patterns, hairstyle, etc., but would be a great game to download on the PC or even an iPad.
Zoombinis says
Does anyone remember the Logical Journey of Zoombinis? I loved it as a 2nd-4th grader in the 90s. It was the only game that my mom would let me play on our family computer, and it looks like the same version is on the Google Play mobile appstore now!
I downloaded it on my phone and it’s a tad too small since I’m squinting to look at the patterns, hairstyle, etc., but would be a great game to download on the PC or even an iPad.