CorporetteMoms

Updated: Nov 1, 2018 100 Comments · by

Maternity Monday: Wrap Midi Dress

Maternity· Recent Recs

This post may contain affiliate links and CorporetteMoms may earn commissions for purchases made through links in this post. As an Amazon Associate, I earn from qualifying purchases.

Machine Wash Maternity Dress: Topshop Wrap Maternity Midi DressHappy Monday! This dress also comes in a bright, happy green, but I prefer the more sedate, sophisticated black — love the shape of it, and it feels architectural and flattering for lots of stages in your pregnancy. It’s $90 and available in sizes 4-12 (which it notes is like 0-14) at Nordstrom. Topshop Wrap Maternity Midi Dress Here’s a plus-size option. (L-3)

Sales of note for 9.10.24

(See all of the latest workwear sales at Corporette!)

Kid/Family Sales

  • Carter’s – Birthday sale, 40-50% off & extra 20% off select styles
  • Hanna Andersson – Up to 50% off all baby; up to 40% off all Halloween
  • J.Crew Crewcuts – Extra 30% off sale styles
  • Old Navy – 40% off everything
  • Target – BOGO 25% off select haircare, up to 25% off floor care items; up to 30% off indoor furniture up to 20% off TVs

See some of our latest articles on CorporetteMoms:

Click here to see our top posts!

And — here are some of our latest threadjacks of interest – working mom questions asked by the commenters!

Comments

  1. Anonymous says

    Did any of you use a girdle post partum? It’s been three weeks since my (second) c section – I only have ten to fifteen pounds to lose – but I keep having people assume I am still pregnant and it is awkward… Was considering the bellefit to hold things in and start reshaping?

    Also when did you start exercising? Lifting weights?

    • CPA Lady says

      I started wearing the bellefit (the one with the hooks on the front, if it matters) about 10 days after my c-section. I generally hate shape-wear but really loved the bellefit. It helped me feel more contained, and like my stretched out midsection wasn’t just flopping around. I wore it for a few weeks and it really helped get things back into place, I think.

    • Em says

      I also wore the bellefit (not a C-section) and really liked it and thought it was worth the money. I started wearing it about a week after giving birth. I thought it made a big difference in the size of my stomach, up to a point. I started light lifting at 6 weeks pp and got more serious at 12 weeks pp.

    • anon says

      I wore the one they gave me at the hospital (no a c-section but the ones for c-sections) for almost three weeks straight. I only took it off to wash. It at least gave me a solid placebo effect.

    • Pogo says

      I think Kat wrote a whole post on this. She wore it like, asap after giving birth. I can’t remember if she said it helped or not though…

    • Onlyworkingmomintulsa says

      I wore the bellfit with the hooks up the front for 6 weeks starting about a week after giving birth. It certainly helped me feel more supportive and helped my clothes fit better, but sure didn’t affect the size of my stomach/loose skin.

  2. CLMom says

    What does a reasonable social life look like after kids? Between working full time and wanting to spend my non-work time enjoying the family, my friendships are starting to wane (most do not have kids or live far away). I want to model a healthy balance for my daughter by going out and being social (not just phone calls/texts), but I feel like I don’t have enough time as it is.

    • anne-on says

      Honestly if we didn’t have neighbors with young kids I wouldn’t have a social life. I do try to call/email/text friends as much as I can, but we moved to a different town with no local friends/family so in-person visits are rare. Between working full time, kid activities, and family obligations we don’t have much free time. My son sees both my husband and I take ‘me’ time (gym, manicures, massages, reading, etc.) but I don’t really have the time or the desire to have lots of nights out with friends.
      Someone here mentioned that friendships are often shaped like barbells – intense when you’re younger, thinner in the middle, and more intense as you are older and have more free time. It’s been helpful to think about it that way.

    • GCA says

      Following! As kid gets older, we have more playdates with friends who have children, or who have become friends because of our children. Sometimes breakfast with our more obliging childless/ childfree friends. I work largely from home and any adult time is welcome!

    • NewMomAnon says

      So, one of the beautiful parts of being divorced is that I have every other weekend to do anything I want without a child. Yes, there are errands and cleaning, but I make it a point to see friends at least a couple times each of those weekends. I think if I were ever to remarry and have another child, I would push very hard for a similar arrangement; each parent gets a weekend day every other weekend without parenting responsibilities, with complete flexibility to schedule a night out or a morning brunch or whatever on that day. The flip side is that, when it isn’t your week, you have to schedule around the kids.

      I don’t make plans on weeknights. I try to do a few lunches a week, and that can veer personal or professional.

    • Pogo says

      One of my friends has a 4 and 6 year old. We generally catch up over coffee or lunch during the workday when her kids are at school/daycare, since we work near each other. The other time I see her with any frequency is at yoga – we chat beforehand for a bit and walking out of class together. Her husband watches the kids and she kills two birds – socializing and working out.

      She’s my model for work/life balance and I think her easygoing husband and wfh + fulltime childcare are the reasons it all works. She’s also super proactive about making plans and putting it out there to everybody (usually on facebook).

      She also brings her daughters sometimes to Saturday morning stuff – brunch or mani/pedis – and they actually love to be around all the “ladies” and feeling grown up. None of us mind kids at all, even those of us who don’t have them yet, so it works.

      • dc mom anon says

        I bring my 2 year old daughter out with me frequently. Not always ideal, but sometimes that’s all I can swing. As a result, I think she is really accustomed to dining out and being around adults. I worry that if we decide to have another, things won’t be as easy. Also, it can be cute/funny to see a toddler at happy hour (at a kid-friendly place), but not so with two kids.

    • hoola hoopa says

      Since you mentioned wanting to be a role model for your daughter, keep in mind that she won’t be paying any attention at all to your social life until she’s older – when it’s also easier for you to get out and about. It gets so much easier to have a social life as your kids get older. You have more time/energy – but older kids also push you to meet and see people related to their activities.

      Most of my friends are out of state, so we keep in touch electronically and visit once or twice a year (they don’t have kids, so it’s usually them coming to me – although I go to them when my most recent baby weans). We alternate between one-one-one and family visits, except for one friend who truly doesn’t like kids so I only do one-on-ones. One friend in particular likes to just hang out with us for a weekend doing all our normal routine, so I know my social life would look a lot different if she lived locally.

      My local friends also have small children (how we met!) so we meet for playdates. As my kids have gotten older, those ‘playdates’ convert to seeing each other routinely for scouts, sports practice, school pickup/drop-off, etc. They are also super busy with their lives, so it’s not very often that we set up explicit gatherings outside of that, but we do have each other over for dinner, go camping together, etc.

      Much of my social life happens at work. My kids do hear about those folks and meet them at the family picnic, so they are aware that I have a social life even if they don’t see it.

  3. Amelia Bedelia says

    I need to enlarge some pics to hang and was thinking of doing it onto canvas. does someone have a favorite company for this? I’d like good quality.

    • sfg says

      MPIX.com does canvas – they are the consumer arm of a pro photo lab (Miller’s). They have sales semi-regularly.

    • JayJay says

      Mpix is great. I’ve also had good luck with Canvas to Go (they always have sales) and Pixel2Canvas, who also has sales but is more focused towards professional photographers. The quality is by far the best with Pixel2Canvas for me.

    • Anon in NYC says

      I used Canvas on Demand, and I thought the quality was pretty good (they also always have sales). But be forewarned that they will spam you.

  4. Closet Redux says

    Should I insist on my toddler treating her baby dolls gently?

    My 2.5 year old goes to daycare and is pretty well socialized to know that we don’t push our friends and we have to be gentle with the babies. She’s pretty good about this, though does sometimes push or hit the other kids (so far as I can tell, developmentally appropriate as compared with the other children). We are expecting a baby sibling in a few months and talk a lot about how we have to be careful with the new baby. Thing is, she has taken to throwing or hitting her baby dolls, which she hasn’t really done in the past. My inclination is to correct her and insist she treat the dolls gently, but I also feel like maybe it’s fine to get her aggression out on a doll rather than the other children. But I certainly don’t want her thinking that throwing the baby doll down the stairs is an ok thing to do with a real baby. Thoughts?

    • Faye says

      YMMV, but I insist we treat our things with respect. Any toys that are thrown, any books that are stood on, any dolls that are hit – I take them away while talking about being nice to our things. I also insist on putting things away before you play with a new toy, and putting it in the right spot with all the pieces accounted for. I just don’t want a house full of broken toys or puzzles with lost pieces or dolls with haphazard hair.

      My DH calls it neurotic, but I call it my sanity-saver. It’s so much easier to color when you know the box has all the correct colors and the coloring books are all in one spot, rather than running around for 20 minutes trying to find the damn blue crayon. And then I don’t have a ton of cleaning at night, it’s more tidying than tornado-level-cleanup.

      • Anons says

        I agree with this attitude. My husband’s family raised him wonderfully, but one of my peeves is that he does not treat things with respect. He will carelessly break things and lose things. I probably care a but too much about *things* so I am hoping we can strike a happy balance with my daughter so that she takes care of her stuff but isn’t inordinately obsessed with things. One of those parenting issues that I never thought about and now have to deal with!

        • POSITA says

          Our rule is that purposeful play is okay, but you can’t intentionally or carelessly destroy things. It’s not acceptable to dump all the toy baskets out for entertainment, but it’s okay to have a dozen toys out as long as they are all part of the game (e.g., use blocks to bury Lego treasure for a treasure hunt in costumes with a medical kit for injuries and babies in tow). I would also not have a problem with her peeling off crayon wrappers to use the side of a crayon yo shade a drawing, but not to scatter wrappers all over the house. It’s a fine distinction.

      • Closet Redux says

        This is interesting and I think useful in terms of taking care of our things. My concern really is whether my child’s behavior toward her dolls should mirror what I expect of her behavior toward other children/babies. I’m not worried about her destroying her dolls (at least not in this question), more about behavior that I don’t want to see replicated when its another child.

    • NewMomAnon says

      I have taken the position that my daughter’s dolls are hers to abuse as she wishes. When she abuses the dolls, I sometimes ask her, “Can we do that to babies at school?” and she always shouts “NO!” I’d rather she have some outlet to express her bad feelings.

      • MomAnon4This says

        This. You’d be surprised at the grasp kids have on the distinction between reality and imagination.
        One theory against PokemonGo I’ve heard is that it blurs the line between reality and fiction, but They said the same thing about Sesame Street when it started showing real people and Muppets together in the same scene. Two entire generations have grown up since then and no one sober thinks Muppets are real.

        If you want your daughter to value and take care of things, that’s fine, but don’t blame reality/imagination.

  5. Momata says

    I also do what Faye describes. My response to this situation would be to require better behavior with regard to the toys, regardless of any extension that behavior might have to a baby sibling. Mostly because of the chaos and aggression that behavior introduces. I would also work on better ways to handle anger than throwing things . . . deep breathing, talking about the feelings, etc. I think that’s important in general, and with a baby sibling around, even without the specific potential link between a doll baby and a real baby.

    • mascot says

      I think some kids do better with a physical outlet for their anger/feelings so we allow some alternate controlled destruction. You can kick a ball, hit your bed pillows, jump on a trampoline, run laps, swing as hard as you can on the swing, smash playdough, etc. I’ll even put up with some kicking the floor of your room during a tantrum as long as you can’t break anything and it is limited to your room.

      • Closet Redux says

        I think so, too, and so don’t want to shut down a healthy outlet for aggression or other “big feelings.” I don’t want her to think that her actions or feeling are bad– she is entitled to them– but I do want her to channel them appropriately. I like your ideas about kicking and hitting balls, pillows, etc. Would you allow your child to kick/ hit stuffed animals or dolls? Or is that too close to the real thing? Wondering if I should steer this behavior or allow it as a healthy and appropriate outlet.

        • mascot says

          My son only had a few dolls and he didn’t play with them much so most of my experience has been with his stuffed animal menagerie. We don’t really interfere with how he plays with them as they go sailing across the room, get dragged by their ears, sat on, force fed his pretend cooking, or smothered in hugs. Every now and then we might comment on aww, poor turtle, you hurt his head. Maybe it’s easier to separate in our minds what he does with his floppy toy dog from how he treats our real dogs with the floppy ears? He’s mostly seemed to understand the difference. And until we could really trust him on that, he wasn’t left alone with the dogs for example. Same with how you won’t leave a toddler alone with a new sibling.
          Another thing that we do use the dolls/animals for is to play-act different scenes, allowing him to play the parent and us play the child. She’s probably a little young for that, but its another tool to allow them to explore feelings and solve problems in a less confrontational way.

  6. NewMomAnon says

    Any preschool transition advice? My daughter started transitioning to the preschool classroom – same daycare center, just a different room. When she moved to toddlers, she had a week of being somewhat sad, but could be distracted from the sad. But with the preschool transition, last week saw her spending big chunks of time sobbing hysterically, asking for her toddler teachers, asking to go home, and trying to escape. This week seems to be headed in a similar direction.

    I spent quite a bit of time with her in the new classroom at pickup time last week, and will continue to do so until she takes to it. We sent pictures of family. Is there anything else I can do to help her?

    She is otherwise so ready for preschool – very independent, speaking in complete sentences (and sometimes paragraphs), potty trained, physically as tall and strong as her preschool classmates. But she is missing the cuddly, warm toddler teachers. I know that once she settles in, she is going to love the preschool classroom and she’ll thrive on the boundaries set by the preschool teachers. It’s just painful to watch her going through this transition.

    • mascot says

      Transitions are just hard so I think you just have to wait it out. Have her naps and snack schedules changed in the new class? Does she need a bigger breakfast or supplemental snack? More sleep?

      • hoola hoopa says

        +1 Transitions are hard. Age can be a huge factor, rather than differences between the classroom. (As in, the same transition can be harder at one age than at another). Give it a month. Know that it will be hard and be patient.

        When one of my kids was really struggling with a room transition, they’d move him to his previous room at the end of the day as the ratio dropped (the learning aspect of preschool is only in the morning, so he wasn’t missing anything). For him, splitting the day was helpful. For other, I suppose it could be harder.

        • Spirograph says

          Agree that transitions are just hard. My son recently moved up to preschool from the cuddlier toddler class, and we just try to have extra cuddle time at home to make up for it (he’s a very snuggly kid). It might also help to talk up how much fun your daughter will have with her same friends, if they’ve moved up to the preschool class, too.

          One thing I love about our daycare center is that they try to do the transitions gradually — the kids do half-day visits to the new room a few days a week for weeks before the final move, and I think it really helps the kids and teachers get used to the new personalities and environment. Depending on the size/staff of your center, maybe something you could suggest?

      • NewMomAnon says

        I don’t think her schedule has changed much, which is good – it’s the teachers and cognitive demands that have changed (and I think the increased challenge will be great for her). A follow up question about drop offs; I know the wisdom is “short and sweet,” but I’ve never had to deal with a sad child who doesn’t have a trusted teacher in the classroom yet. I’ve now had to leave her crying twice; each time I’ve gotten the attention of a teacher, pried my kiddo’s fingers from my skirt, and left her wailing in the arms of a stranger. Should I be doing more to ease that transition?

        I now realize how lucky I’ve been to have consistently easy daycare drop offs. This is heart breaking.

        • mascot says

          Keep drop-offs short and sweet. The longer you stay, the worse it is. These aren’t strangers; they just aren’t her preferred comfort person yet.

  7. octagon says

    Hit me with your best $30-and-under gifts for a girl turning 1, please. Bonus if they are available on amazon or another site with quick delivery. Thank you!

    • PinkKeyboard says

      Melissa and Doug wooden puzzles, any push toys (we have some Hape one that is wooden with whirling butterflies), busy band (set of little instruments), plastic dinosaurs, trucks (ours are those green toys plastic ones), shape sorter, balls.

    • NewMomAnon says

      Books, especially box sets or ones that make noise. My daughter was especially fond of this one:

      https://www.amazon.com/Baby-Einstein-Board-Book-Block/dp/1450830935

      The Sandra Boynton box sets and If You Give a Mouse a Cookie box sets were also favorites. Other favorite books at that age or shortly after: Pete the Cat (the original three are the best), Brown Bear Brown Bear, and board books of baby sign language.

      Other ideas: bubble machine, art supplies (big rolls of paper, stickers, finger paint, washable crayons), and sneakers.

    • Faye says

      Fisher Price Little People (any of the sets, but some good ones are the airplane, fire truck, school bus, or barn/farm) I think those sets are all around $20, and then you can add a character set for ~$8 – search tessa or mia to get the girl characters with a little animal friend.

      Learning Resources play food or sets – the Farmers Market Color Sorting Set is amazing, but all the dinner/lunch/waffles/sandwich sets are really good and high quality.

      Any of the Roger Priddy “First 100” board books – we have several and they’re perfect for 1 year olds who are building their vocabulary

    • PhilanthropyGirl says

      I just ordered my nephew the duplo counting train for his 1st birthday.

      Eric Carle has three wonderful books on colors, numbers and shapes – essentially matching shapes or colors. Beautiful art and interactive.

      Tobbles are very popular in my area – great stacking toy.

      I love all the Grimm wooden toys – the rainbow stacker and the nesting bowls are very popular with my kiddo, as are the peg people.

      The VanFleet boxed book sets are great – I think we have Lick! Sniff! Munch! – and pretty durable with little hands. The Busy Bear books have also proved durable.

      Learning Resources has great play food (we like the color sorting fruits and vegetables), as well as large animal figures (similar to Toobs, but more appropriately sized for a child under 3).

    • Anon says

      Duplos or books are my go to for either gender 1 year olds. Both on Amazon.

    • H says

      megabloks, books, puzzles, bubbles, clothes, something she could push, growth chart.. Also, maybe call mom and ask? Maybe there is something they’ve thought about getting her but haven’t yet.

  9. Anon for Potty says

    How do you know when your kiddo is ready to potty train?

    My 2.5 year old son really has no interest. Dirty (No. 2) diapers don’t bother him. He doesn’t wake up dry. But I feel like we should at least start trying at 2.5.

    • anon says

      My son was not really ready until 3.5. I think he was interested before, but he had constant accidents until he was closer to 3.5. Poop accidents are no joke. You don’t have to start early – it can just drag the process out if your kid isn’t ready. And you can’t force a kid to go on the potty. If he isn’t willing to try, just wait. If he is, you could give it a go, but don’t feel like you have to start now. Boys tend to be ready later than girls I think.

      • anon says

        School told us our son was ready at 2.5 and had him pee trained pretty quickly but by god we had poop accidents for almost a year (can you really call them accidents if that’s all that happens? no, no you can’t). anyway I was mad that we listened to them when my gut said he wasn’t ready and, actually, he ended up learning to poop lying down so he could do it at nap time, so we had to totally retrain him how to poop when he was finally ready. Which is a long way of saying our younger son can live in diapers/pull ups until he is 5 for all I care. That was awful for all of us.

        • anon says

          I’m the anon above, and I just have to say we had almost the same experience with daycare pushing the training earlier! I finally figured out–after several months of constant accidents at home–that they were just taking him to the potty frequently and having him check; he wasn’t initiating going to the potty. That is when I said, forget it, we’re backing off until he can actually tell us he needs to go. Thankfully we didn’t have the waiting until diapers for pooping problem (my kid would poop anywhere – tub, on the floor, in underwear – and he didn’t usually need to go except when at home) but I know a lot of others who did.

    • Anon says

      We set up a potty learning environment for my 2.5 year old, but aren’t pushing training because, like your son, he doesn’t seem very interested. I nannied alot of 2 year olds when I was a nanny in college and have no interest cleaning pee and poop out of everything (car seats, rugs, couches, etc.). From what I saw, those that were ready trained easily, those that weren’t had accidents everywhere and it became a power struggle.

      We have the books, the potty chair, little seat for the big toilet, and we ask him when it is obvious that he is going if he want to sit on the potty. 99% of the time he says no. He’s had one success, for the nanny of course :)

    • NewMomAnon says

      I vote in favor of “spare yourself the pain.” My kiddo demanded to wear undies at 2, even though I knew she wasn’t *quite* ready. In essence, we got trained to take her to the potty every hour, and if we forgot, she had an accident. It made it hard to leave her with a babysitter, and daycare pickup frequently meant we had a little baggy (or three!) of gross clothes to clean out when we got home. I’ve dealt with this for about 6 months now.

      Starting a few weeks ago, she began asking to go before she has an accident, and can stretch out the time between potty stops to 2-4 hours, and it’s so much easier. It’s a biological readiness thing that just can’t be hurried or forced. I know you’ll get some snappy remarks from old-timers and childless people that he “should” be potty trained by now, but it’s really not worth it.

    • Anon for Potty says

      Thank goodness for your replies. My gut is that he isn’t ready but I am getting the side eye from others. He loves sitting on the potty before bath time (or whenever) and then using one piece of toilet paper and flushing, so no fear of the potty, but no desire to use it.

      Thanks for the reassurance!

    • Anons says

      I’m going to play devil’s advocate here. I think 2.5 is a great time to give it a go. We used Oh Crap potty training and she firmly believes that things get a lot harder after 30 months. (Granted, her book can be a bit Judgy McJudgerson for my tastes, but I otherwise found the potty tips helpful.) Like any skill, it doesn’t all come together magically in one day. It is pretty normal to have to prompt a potty-trained child to go to the potty until age 3 or 4 (so they aren’t just going to get themselves to the potty all the time) and bladder size will dictate how long they can hold it (with as low as 60 minutes during the day being totally normal).

      That said, like all things, you just gotta do what works for your family. If you really feel that he is not ready to do this, then it may be best to wait. The only other thing I would add is maybe pick a date that you will at least try to potty train if he hasn’t shown signs of readiness. Because I am sure there are kids that just might not show readiness on their own until like age 10, so with those kids you just have to take the lead. You know your kid best.

  10. Homesick Au Pair says

    Paging any other au pair host parents: Our first au pair arrived Friday. She has spent hours each day in her room crying because she is homesick. I have tried getting her to go for a walk around our farm, making tea and talking about her family, getting her out for a hike and trip to the beach. Today she cried as we were driving around town right after a trip to the playground. My kids so desperately want to connect, and she tried for the first day but has spent her time since in her room or texting on her phone. I’m heading back to work tomorrow. Any advice?

    • Anonymous says

      No advice. When I was about 10 years old, my parents had an au pair who acted like this and she went home after a few weeks. I never really got to know her.

    • blue says

      Can the agency that you got her through put you/ her in touch with any other area au pairs from her home country so you can set up either a group play date or let her hang out with someone else in her shoes?

      • Homesick Au Pair says

        She visited with one of her roommates from training school who is also from the same country for three hours yesterday. After, she walked into our house, went upstairs and texted me to come up two hours later as she was crying.

        Honestly, I think this may be more than homesickness. I am worried about a lack of basic coping skills or potential depression.

    • Homesickness says

      Has she ever been away from home before? I was in the military and I remember being absolutely shocked how many people were crying themselves to sleep the first few nights of basic training. They all adjusted eventually, but it took a week+ for some. I can only imagine what a wreck those girls would have been with culture shock, new family, potential language barrier, and caretaker responsibility thrown in the mix.

      What I’m trying to say is that this isn’t necessarily abnormal. Coping skills need to be learned, and if this is the first time she’s had to face a homesickness situation, there’s a learning curve. But as a parent, you’re not describing someone I’d want to leave my kids alone with. I’ve never had an au pair, but I’m sure your agency’s dealt with this situation before. Maybe ask them for suggestions or a timeline to get a different au pair if this doesn’t resolve soon? I’m sorry you’re going through this, it must be incredibly stressful!

    • Anons says

      How stressful. I think she may adapt with time, as others have said, but I would be very stressed if I was in your shoes. I second contacting the agency. Other things to think about: can you work from home to help ease the adjustment period, can you frequently check in by phone (not just checks), any friends in the area that can drop by or meet her to check in, would backup care with another person around for the first week make sense? Just from what you say here, this does not sound like a situation where I would be comfortable leaving the kids. I am really hoping the agency can be a good resource for you, as I am sure she is not the only a pair that has had a rough time adjusting.

  11. Solid food? says

    I can’t seem to find a straight answer (from my pediatrician or Baby 411 or the internet) about when to introduce solid foods. My daughter is 4.5 months right now and exclusively breast fed. She is large for her age (80% for height and weight). Should I start solids now or wait until she is 6 months? At her 4-month appt, the pediatrician said that the 4-6 month window is when most people start solid foods, but noted that some experts (including the AAP, I think?) recommend waiting until 6 months.

    I’m not really in a hurry to start — I guess I just want someone to tell me what to feed her and when!

    In case this matters, at 6 months I will go back to work and I am planning on switching her over to formula during the day and nursing her in the morning and at night. The pediatrician was really judgmental about this plan when I mentioned it at her 4-month appointment, which I found surprising…and really obnoxious. I just cannot see making the pumping thing work with my biglaw schedule. I would rather use that time to get home to my daughter 30 minutes earlier (she goes to bed at 7 pm!!) instead of sitting in my cold office pumping. So, if you have any advice about that transition too, I would love to hear it!

    • Anonymous says

      Our ped recommended waiting to 6, as did AAP so that is what we did. We also did BLW, though, and kiddo definitely wouldn’t have been ready for finger foods before 6 months. As it was, he didn’t really start eating solids until 6.5-7 months.

      And ugh to your ped re pumping. Do what works best for your family. I have a medium-paced 9-6 and find pumping to be annoying and time-consuming. I can’t fathom doing it on big law hours, even if I had my own office where I could do it (which I don’t now). I think nursing at night and morning sounds like a great plan. It’s been said here many times, but worth repeating: it’s the presence of B-milk that is good, not the absence of formula.

      • Katala says

        +1 to all this. We also did BLW and kiddo started eating solids around 6.5-7 months (we gave him spoonfuls of mashed sweet potato and banana once a couple times before that). He was grabbing food off our plates, sat up well on his own and was clearly interested, so we started giving him finger foods. It went great and he’s a really really good eater at 15 months. I think they let you know when they’re ready.

    • Anon says

      We waited until about 5.5 months with both of my boys. I think they are recommending the latter end of the 4-6 month range now with the requirements that they are sitting up on their own. So I waited for that. First try with my second and he was completely uninterested/spitting it all out, so we waited 2 more weeks and tried again (he loved it). My first was chowing down at the first go.

      So I would wait until she is sitting unassisted and then try. If she swallows and seems to enjoy it, then she’s ready. If not, wait a couple of weeks and try again.

      No advice on the formula switch, but I’m sorry your pediatrician was a downer. Sounds like perfectly good reasoning to me, and even if it wasn’t, the shaming is obnoxious. I’m pretty sure your daughter would rather spend time with you than your BM

    • Anon in NYC says

      We waited until 6 months for a few reasons: 1) there’s no real need to introduce solids earlier, per our pediatrician, and 2) my daughter wasn’t interested. There are some general guidelines as to when your baby is physically ready to eat solids (http://kellymom.com/nutrition/starting-solids/solids-when/), although we didn’t wait for the pincer grasp since we started with purees.

    • hoola hoopa says

      We’ve started anywhere between 4 and 6 months, based entirely on child interest and ability and whatever was happening in our lives (ie, travel). Outside of child interest/ability, I really don’t think it matters for typical purees, but you need to be further towards 6 mo for finger foods.

      Lame response from your doc re: formula. I did the same for my third, and have no regrets. It was expensive but it was a huge relief to not have the pressure. The transition from breast milk to formula was actually really smooth! We used the orange similar sensitive (the one sold at Costco), which the internet told me tasted the best, and based on family history of lactose intolerance, we wanted a ‘sensitive’ option. I don’t think we even needed to half-half; I remember him accepting right away.

      • Anonymous says

        +1 to all of this. We intended to wait till 6 months with both of my kids, but they just really seemed to want to try out real food, so we did it around 4.5 months or so.

    • Lyssa says

      My ped recommended starting around 4 months, and I liked doing it that way. I really liked feeding solids, and I like starting earlier because, to my mind, it’s low stress – the kid tastes it and tries it, but if s/he doesn’t actually eat it (or if we just don’t have time some days), it’s not a big deal because nutrition is really about the milk/formula.

      But I think that it’s really not something that matters much – just do whatever works well for you. I’m fairly certain that the APA’s recommendation was more about trying to increase breastfeeding than any particular downside to feeding solids before 6 months. If I were going back to work at 6 months, though, I would start several weeks before that, just so you’re not introducing something new around the same time that you’re dealing with that.

    • anon says

      I think part of the reason for the confusion is that this is an area where the recommendations have been changing recently, from starting at 4 months to waiting until 6 months. Also, this is like baby sleep – everyone has a strong opinion, but none of them agree. I would say plan to start at 6 months and then if you find you have a reason to start earlier you can. We started just before 6 months because daycare told us my son would get really upset when he saw other babies eating solids! So infant jealousy drove our decision. Keep in mind that your child won’t be getting much of her nutrition from solids until much closer to a year, so you don’t need to worry about that. The only consideration related to the formula transition I can think of is just putting some space between starting solids and starting formula in case you need to diagnose any allergies or reactions to something. And if you want to be the one to introduce solids rather than a childcare provider, give your self that chance before you go back. We started on thanksgiving, just for fun.

      • Anons says

        +1. Her book has a whole chapter on feeding that I wish I had read when my baby was 3-4 months old.

    • PhilanthropyGirl says

      We waited until 6 months as well. Our Ped also gave us the 4-6 mo window, with the AAP suggestion of 6 months. She was also a pretty big proponent of “food before 1 is just for fun” – even with our skinny baby. He enjoyed eating back then (before he became a toddler and started throwing stuff on the floor and putting his fork in his hair). I just made sure he drank his milk first and then let him eat as much as he wanted after that. Some kids won’t be interested, and that’s fine too.

      Boo on your ped. Feed the baby, however it works for you. I know the AAP pushes b/milk until 12 months (and WHO is now pushing until 2) – but at the end of the day all that matters is a nourished child with a full belly. I needed the pumping time at work. My transition back into the office after FMLA was really rough, compounded with unwanted job changes and all manner of other things, so I desperately needed that break twice a day to reset. But you do you; as long as the baby’s fed, just do your thing.

    • NewMomAnon says

      I started my kiddo on purees at the young end of the 4-6 month range because she was stealing food from the older babies at daycare – I came to pick her up one day and found her parked under a friend’s high chair, eating puffs off the ground. She LOVED food, and it was fun to feed her. Otherwise, we were going to wait until closer to the 6 month mark, per some of the recommendations I saw from the AAP.

    • Frozen Peach says

      I love Moms on Call because their advice is succinct, clear-cut, and non-judgmental. Highly recommend their series of books for questions like these.

      Also, you are wiser than I was. Pumping nearly did me in with a big firm schedule, and I ended up switching to formula during the day, nursing when with kiddo. We’re still going strong with that (now cow’s milk and food) at 15 mos. Don’t let anyone’s judgmental anything stand in your way of what you know is right for YOU and YOUR kid. I bet that pediatrician would have backtracked if you’d asked, “From your evidence, science-based perspective, can you explain to me which will be worse for my kid’s development: being fed a mix of formula and b**milk or not seeing her mother during the work week because I spent the morning and evening time we would have had together pumping in my office?”

      Sorry, clearly a pain point for me…

      • AwayEmily says

        My daughter is also exactly 4.5 months olds! I read the relevant chapters in the Science of Mom and in The Informed Parent and it seems like the evidence is pretty clearly in the “it doesn’t matter” camp. We are starting now-ish because we are excited (she had her first meal last night — egg yolk). The only evidence-backed takeaways were (1) make sure they get enough iron, either through cereal or through things like egg yolk and liver (ew) and (2) introduce allergens early (in the 6-8 month range).

      • Solid food? says

        Just want to say that I love your comeback to the pediatrician. I hate that I can never think of the right thing to say in these types of situations…instead I spent the whole drive home thinking of the smart and sensible things I should have said in response.

    • Anon says

      We started at 4.5 months because she was having trouble gaining weight (99% height 80% dropped to 50-60% weight…), was sitting totally unassisted etc. we started with avocados mixed with breastmilk and she ate that for a week. Then we thickened with baby oatmeal. It wasn’t until about 5 months that we moved “up” to other foods, but she was ravenous for the solids!

      • Leslie Knope says

        Ugh, I am so sorry about your ped being judgmental about breastfeeding. I am a few months ahead of you. I went back to work full time when my baby was 11 weeks (too early and I couldn’t of done it without my mom being the one who was watching him). I pumped for 3 months and my supply dwindled pretty significantly. At 6 months I called it quits and switched to formula. And it was fine. And I started to lose the last lbs that were clinging on for dear life. So that was awesome!

        We started solids in earnest at 6 months. Before that he wasn’t interested. And continuing my quest to not be Type A about parenting, I do not make my own baby food and I just buy the best food I can that is packaged. Its all about what works for you and your family.

    • Katarina says

      I want to add that the AAP is actually mixed on their recommendation. The committee on breastfeeding says 6 months, but the committee on feeding recommends 4-6 months. There is some evidence that starting food earlier prevents allergies. From what I can tell there is no evidence that starting food earlier in the 4-6 month range is harmful. My pediatrician recommends 4 months for this reason.

  12. Pacifier Nightmare says

    My 2.5 yo started chewing off the end of his pacifier, so we had to discontinue use for fear of him choking on it. We had him throw them away, as they were broken, but it was still a pretty stark transition with no books or pacifier fairies, etc. I found him chewing on the part you suck on and it freaked me out that he could have choked on it, so I said no more.

    But last night was HORRIBLE. He was up 3-4X wanting it or “something for his mouth”. He’s been pacifier free at daycare for a while, so I was hoping it wouldn’t be this horrible. He also has blankets and stuffed animals and a noise machine, so I’m not sure if we can offer something else??

    Anyone have any experience on how long the transition will last? I know every kid is different, but hoping there is a light at the end of this tunnel.

    • hoola hoopa says

      My child who was a hardcore binky user was older, but the second night was much better. I think it was fine after day three.

      But she hasn’t outgrown the need for something in her mouth (she’s 7), so I started getting “sensory necklaces” (ie, chewbeads for smaller necks) to save her fingernails and water bottles. There are tons of options if you internet search (or amazon search).

      • Pacifier Nightmare says

        I have one of those necklaces! I think he will forever have a mouth sensory need as well. Thanks for the idea.

    • pockets says

      My 2.5 yo daughter, who never used a pacifier and exclusively sucked on her thumb (and still does), found an old zoli stick (available on amazon) and declared that it was her pacifier, and now sucks/chews on that. After a few weeks of aggressive chewing/sucking, no parts have fallen off. Could you try to give him a zoli stick to see if that soothes him?

      • NewMomAnon says

        Second the zoli stick. My kiddo gnaws on that thing with the full force of her 2.5 year old jaws, and nothing has broken off yet.

        You could also look up “fidget toys” on Amazon; they make chewable toys for kids and adults with sensory issues. They are meant to withstand even adult chewing.

      • Pacifier Nightmare says

        Thanks for the idea, I’m going to stop by the baby boutique on the way home to see if I can find one!

  13. Sorry for the gross question says

    Since we’re talking about potty training… I have a 23 month old girl. She’s always had constipation problems. I imagine it’s genetic, and sometimes want to change the title of the book to “Everybody Poops… Except You and Mama”. The pediatrician suggested I put her on miralax and she’s been on a low dose of it for a really long time. She will still go several days without pooping fairly frequently. Well, lately she keeps saying “poop poop” and trying to pull off her diaper and getting really agitated. But nothing happens. She used to say “poop” when she actually had pooped, but now she’s not even trying to poop when she’s saying it. I don’t know what’s happening. Why are toddlers so confusing? Has anyone had something like this happen? Should I take her to the doctor?

    • hoola hoopa says

      Sound like constipation. She may have a blockage.

      Bad news is that the best way to get it out is heavy doses of miralax and lots of potty time (get instructions from your doctor).

      Good new is that her BMs should be better once the blockage is gone.

    • Anons says

      I would talk to her doctor. I have also noticed that probiotics can help get things moving (for adults and kids), so you could try that as a low-intervention approach. Ask your doctor, but I think adding mineral oil to foods can also be helpful for constipation.

    • NewMomAnon says

      My kiddo did that when she got constipated – we did a heavy rotation of pears, pear juice, prunes, massage, warm water on the belly, and lots of walking. I felt so bad for her. I would call your ped, especially if this is happening regularly.

  14. Meg Murry says

    I apparently have developed a stomach bug that reminds me way too much of (all day) morning sickness. I know I’m not pregnant (IUD + negative just in case test + no recent action), but I need to figure out how to get through this without:
    -vomiting at work
    -spending the whole day feeling like I’m going to vomit
    -having to convince my co-workers that despite the vomiting and diet of ginger ale and saltines, no, really, I’m not pregnant
    -using sick days I don’t have anymore (I’m pretty much out, and while I could dip into my vacation time, that will get me side eye at best)

    I’m working on the “just keep eating bland foods so your stomach is never really full but never totally empty” strategy, as well as slowly sipping water, ginger ale and lemonade, etc.

    Any other strategies I should be employing? I’m hoping to do some “I don’t want to spread this bug so I’m going to work from home”, but I don’t know how long I can make that work.

    Hopefully me asking this question will make it all miraculously better by morning, but I’m not holding out hope.

    • hoola hoopa says

      Do you mean this has been happening for multiple days? If so, see a doctor.

      I’ve had times in my life when I felt like that for one or two days right before my period. It’s a lovely PMS symptom. I do think it can be resolved or reduced with birth control pills.

    • Anonymous says

      How long has it been going on? I know nothing about Zofran outside of pregnancy, but maybe your PCP could prescribe it (or suggest something else) if it’s been longer than a few days?

    • Maddie Ross says

      Multiple days of this is likely too long to be a normal stomach bug. I would definitely go to a doctor. And yes, Zofran and other anti-nausea meds are totally a thing outside of pregnancy, so you can suggest/request something like that.

ABOUT

WORK WITH US

SERIOUS STUFF