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While I was browsing the Macy’s sale online, I came across this pretty cashmere wrap. This seems like a wrap that I would keep in my office to beat the frigid temps that my office is kept at. When I think about cost-per-wear, the sweaters I keep at my office definitely get the most wear and bang for my buck. This wrap is cashmere, and to me seems like an easy way to be warm but still look nice while sitting at your desk. I also like that it comes in two color options — I’d choose the black and gray to match basically all of my work clothes. Originally, the price of this wrap was $189, but it’s currently on sale for $99.99. Striped Cashmere Wrap This post contains affiliate links and CorporetteMoms may earn commissions for purchases made through links in this post. For more details see here. Thank you so much for your support!Sales of note for 8.30.24
(See all of the latest workwear sales at Corporette!)
- Ann Taylor – 30% off full-price purchase; $99 jackets, dresses & shoes; extra 50% off sale
- Banana Republic Factory – 50-70% off everything + extra 20% off
- Boden – 20% off
- Eloquii – Up to 60% off everything; extra 60% off all sale
- J.Crew – 40% off sitewide; extra 60% off sale styles
- J.Crew Factory – Extra 20% off orders $125+; extra 60% off clearance; 60%-70% off 100s of styles
- Lands’ End – 40% off sitewide; 50% off backpacks, 40% off kids’ apparel
- Loft – Summer sale, 30% off new arrivals; up to 50% off much more
- Talbots – 25% off regular-price purchase; 70% off clearance
- Zappos – 28,000+ women’s sale items! (check out these reader-favorite workwear brands on sale, and some of our favorite kids’ shoe brands on sale)
Kid/Family Sales
- Carter’s – 50% off everything
- Hanna Andersson – Up to 40% off everything
- J.Crew Crewcuts – 40% off sitewide; extra 50% off sale styles
- Old Navy – 50-60% off; 50% off pants for the family
- Target – 20% off select clothing for all; up to 50% off home; up to 30% off select nursery furniture; up to 30% off kitchen & dining
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And — here are some of our latest threadjacks of interest – working mom questions asked by the commenters!
- The concept of “backup care” is so stupid…
- I need tips on managing employees in BigLaw who have to leave for daycare pickup…
- I’m thinking of leaning out to spend more time with my family – how can I find the perfect job for that?
- I’m now a SAHM and my husband needs to step up…
- How can I change my thinking to better recognize some of my husband’s contributions as important, like organizing the shed?
- What are your tips to having a good weekend with kids, especially with little kids? Do you have a set routine or plan?
Anon says
My son is going through a nursing strike in the evenings. It started after I returned from a work trip last week. My supply is lower in the evenings and I think he’s frustrated by the slow flow (and probably overtired too). He just cries and pulls off. After about 20 minutes, DH then gives him a bottle. He still nurses well in the morning. Any tips on how to get through this? Is this normal? My first was bottle fed so I have no idea what’s typical.
Anonymous says
How old is he?
anon OP says
4 months
Spirograph says
I don’t remember whether any of my kids did this specifically, but it doesn’t strike me as odd. I get that it’s probably frustrating, but I would just pump in the evening and let your husband give the baby a bottle for a week, then try again.
Anonymous says
Once I went back to work we quickly ended up giving bottles in the evening because of this issue. I’d pump after DD went to bef
Anonymous says
Around that age, I think we had some similar struggles, but it was inconsistent for us. I remember doing things like walking around bouncing my son on the My Breast Friend while singing and trying to get him to latch, which was rather acrobatic for me but did seem to calm him down enough to make a difference. Could you or your husband give your son a small bottle before you try nursing (even before you get home) to take the edge off, and then you can nurse him when he’s less starving? I think we did that a few times. But if bottles only works for you, that’s fine too of course.
TheElms says
I think this is pretty common based on friends with kids. I’ve also been in the same boat, starting around 2 months when I will still on maternity leave. Late afternoon and evening nursing was a real struggle and I was already exhausted from the day of looking after kiddo. So we started a bedtime bottle (which dad did – so awesome that I got a break). Now I’m back at work and sort of miss nursing in the evenings (because it means I nurse once a day and pump 4 or 5 times a day), but I don’t miss all the fussing. So we still do a bedtime bottle. Dad usually does bedtime, but now sometimes I do it because dad is travelling or just because I want to. The upside of a bedtime bottle is that you know how much your kiddo ate. Also if I have a bad pumping day (most days really), we do formula in the bedtime bottle, which I find helpful decreasing the stress on me related to pumping enough. I also found it helped reduce night wakings and also gave me more confidence to let kiddo fuss a bit longer before I intervened because I was more confident that kiddo is not fussing out of hunger. (I knew they ate 4 oz rather than wondering if my supply had been really low and perhaps they only got 2 or 3 oz and were in fact hungry.)
Anon says
Anyone in NYC taken their kid to the thanksgiving parade in recent years? I went as a kid but not since then. I’d like to take my 4 year old this year, and would love some tips. We live in NYC but in an outer borough.
FVNC says
I’ll give you my outdated input, in case it’s helpful. When we lived on the UWS very pre-kids, we loved watching the beginning of the parade along Central Park West, north of the Natural History Museum. We’d go about an hour before the parade was scheduled to begin and always got a front row view of the floats. Over the past decade+ I imagine it’s gotten more crowded but would still probably be way more manageable than anywhere close to midtown. We also would go the night before and see them assembling the floats which was pretty cool and might be interesting for a 4 yr old.
Anon says
I posted yesterday about lice advice — turns out my daughter and I both had lice. I threw money at the problem, three hours a Lice Clinics of America to get everything killed (I HOPE) and removed, along with liberal use of our dryer on high heat. And my H is out of town, so that adds to the fun!
On the plus side — the 2 hours of treatment was the most relaxing time for me this week. This may be a sign I need a kid-free vacation!
FVNC says
Fingers crossed they got them all! As an aside, based on my friends’ experiences, lice outbreaks seem to ONLY occur when husbands are out of town! Good luck :)
Anonymous says
Ha, I reposted on yesterday’s thread, but this is holding true. My husband is leaving on a guy trip for the weekend, and sure enough, one kid’s stuff came home from daycare yesterday because his classmate has lice. My older son was thrilled when I pulled out the lice comb again and asked for a turn as soon as I was done with the little one. Now I know how I’ll be spending my evenings this weekend.
Good luck, Anon! (and yes, plan a kid-free vacation!)
Pogo says
hahaha I feel like everything always hits the fan when husbands are out of town. I think all of my son’s GI bugs have hit when I was solo. I’ve also had flooding, security system issues, and snowstorms happen almost exclusively when husband is out of town.
Anonymous says
yup! At various times, sprained my ankle at 8 months pregnant, totaled a car (fortunately with no serious injuries), and got the flu. DH came home early for the flu, actually. I love him for that.
Anon says
My husband doesn’t travel much for work but is going away for a couple days next month and you guys are scaring me!
ElisaR says
oh man I’m sorry to hear that! It is really sad that that the treatment was a treat but I totally get that…..
Buble says
I just saw this spray recommended on the Young House Love website, and the Amazon reviews were great, so I picked some up on the thought that if a $10 investment prevents lice, awesome and besides I always need conditioning spray anyway. Plus my girls like the way it smells:
Fairy Tales Rosemary Repel Daily Kid Conditioning Spray for Lice Prevention
Anon says
If you have a fabric desk chair at work you may need to do something about that too. Not sure what. Depends on how high your chair is and how long your hair is. Sorry you are dealing with that!
Spirograph says
Since it’s Friday, you probably don’t. If I’m remembering right, lice can’t survive more than 24 or 48 hours off of a head, so they’ll all be dead by Monday.
Anon says
48 hours, but yeah I agree it will be fine by Monday.
Anonymous says
Hanna Andersson sale 50% off on basics!
Buble says
*repeats to self* My kids don’t need more clothes, my kids don’t need more clothes…
*clicks over anyway* :)
Anon says
Due in January… my son needs that bear hoodie.
Anon says
You mean the Marshmallow one? My toddler has that and it’s SOO WARM and cozy. We love it, even though I definitely didn’t get it 50% off.
AnonLaywer says
December for me. There’s a hooded winnie the pooh cardigan I’ve been eying for months . . .
Buble says
Annnnd I ended up getting 4 tops. But beautiful yellow girls shirts are honestly surprisingly hard to find, and it’s my daughter’s favorite color! And I determined that my kids would look adorable in turtlenecks, and we don’t have any, so obviously had to get two of those as well…
2 Cents says
Same. DS has a better wardrobe than me or DH!
Pogo says
I justify it by the fact that my kid only wears shirts with something he likes on them (cats, dogs, trucks, trains, monkeys, etc) and Hanna tends to have good gender neutral options for that stuff. It saves me time and stress in the morning when he has more fun options!
AwayEmily says
out of curiosity, when did these preferences form? I’m DREADING the day when my daughter realizes she can have a say in what she wears (she is currently 3.5 and lets me dress her in pretty much whatever I want, which is mostly plaid flannel shirts and cords these days).
Anon says
My toddler has VERY strong opinions about her clothing and she started expressing them around 18 months so I think it really varies. She’s an easy kid in general but she takes her clothing Very Seriously for some reason.
Pogo says
Same, mine had serious preferences by 18-20 months. It’s totally kid dependent tho.
Emily S. says
My DD didn’t develop this awareness or desire to choose her outfits until she was about 3 or 3.5, and she’s 4.5 now. I’ve imposed my own quality standards by buying mostly Primary dresses and leggings that she can mix and match, which is what she gravitates toward, anyway. That way we are both happy: she can wear a purple dress and teal leggings and I’m happy she’s confident and looks well cared for and not in a t-shirt with flippable sequins that proclaims she’s a mermaid.
Anon says
It’s fine to dress your kid however you like, but it’s kind of gross to imply that kids in cheap sequin mermaid shirts don’t look confident or well-cared for…
anon says
Around 3.5, my daughter formed very strong preferences about what she would wear. Her basic uniform for the past year, at least, has been leggings + dress for spring/fall/winter and dress + cartwheel shorts for summer. T-shirts, the most basic piece of clothing ever, get a HARD NOPE from her so I don’t buy them anymore. Regular shorts also are a hard nope.
SC says
My kid has never developed strong preferences about his clothing. Sure, he has favorite shirts that he’ll choose when they’re clean or get excited about when they come up to the top of the pile. Occasionally, he’ll choose a goofy combination and be proud of himself for it. But he’s never been particular about his clothes or upset that a certain shirt is in the laundry hamper. 95% of the time, he just grabs whatever is on top of the pile.
So, like so many other things, it’s kid-dependent/ luck of the draw.
Emily S. says
Anon at 2:01, after reading your comment, I can see how I was not careful with my word choice. That’s not what I meant; I meant that my preference would be not to have embellished shirts or shirts with slogans, which is a personal style choice. I definitely did not mean that I would read a child dressed in a mermaid sequin shirt as uncared for or confident, but I see how it could be read that way.
Boston Legal Eagle says
Thank you for this! Ended up with that bear sweatshirt (I can’t resist bear hoodies…) and a few other items. Aak, sorry wallet.
Cb says
Thanks everyone for the advice yesterday on toddler rejection. I took my son to Pret for a snack before nursery (this kid will bankrupt me with his exotic fruit salad habits) and we had some lovely quality time watching the traffic and pedestrians out the window. Nursery drop-off was easier today and we’re planning for a kid-heavy weekend.
ElisaR says
oh man I love Pret…. we have a few in NYC but none near me. Reminds me of my study abroad…. as a poor college kid Pret was a TREAT.
Anon says
Anyone have recommendations for packing & moving services for an upcoming move from DC to Philly? Thanks so much!
Anon says
we used Flat Rate. They did not pack for us, but I used them to move from DC to NYC, from NYC to DC and then from DC to Philly. They were great all three times and I’m jealous – i love Philly!
Anonymous says
I’m on mat leave and the partner I work for just sent me a posting for a job in- house at a client. I shouldn’t take this as a sign they don’t want me back, right?
Anonymous says
Hmmm.. no, I would interpret that as IF you want to jump ship and get something more lifestyle friendly, they’d help facilitate getting you in that position with the client. (But yeah, weird.)
Artemis says
Maybe it’s a compliment, they really want a stronger and better relationship with this client and think you’re the one to go forth and do that? I think you could absolutely take it that way if your firm is generally supportive and business savvy, but I agree it’s still a little weird.
Anon says
I think they’re trying to do a nice thing and offer you an opportunity they think you might want. But I agree the timing is more than a little cringy, like they assume all women with kids want to lean out.
Anon says
That’s bizarre. Lawyers are so weird.
Need to Be Anon This Time says
I just need to vent, and am doing this here because it’s wrapped up in me being a mother. I feel terrible about myself a good chunk of every day and am stressed about money a good chunk of every day and it mostly stems from the fact that I’ve been trying to find a new job with higher pay for the last two years, albeit way more focused/intentioned/serious for the last year. And nothing is happening. And I don’t know what else I can do. You know how often, people here say “this time next year things will be better” when people are going through tough stuff (admittedly tougher stuff than this)? It is “this time next year” for me and it’s not better. Networking, applying, getting help with my resume–I am doing all of it, and so far it’s been either nothing or situations that seem like great chances and then just go up in flames. I feel like an utter failure. I leaned out to a law-adjacent job in local government after my last kid was born and now I’m afraid I’ll never be able to get out of my job and the horrible pay scale.
Meanwhile, I know moms who totally stepped out of the workforce for a few years and are getting back in with better jobs than mine. I know moms who work part-time and make more money than I do. I have the same education and basic qualifications they do. Look, our HHI is fine, we are financially fine, but I worry about money because my job pays crap and has no raises and no bonuses and I just do not feel I am contributing enough to our family pot. I cut my personal spending to almost nothing–I spend on my kids, and my husband spends money, albeit not crazy, but I am just in a vicious cycle where since I am not making more money, I have to/want to spend nothing in an attempt to be less stressed. I am capable of earning more, I just can’t seem to figure out how. Why have I kept working full time this whole time if I’m now stuck? What has been the point? The point was to be more present for my kids when my husband was still in biglaw. He’s not anymore. It’s time for me to relaunch my career, and I’m stuck on the pad.
I feel so bad about all of this a significant portion of the time and I hide it from everyone. Many people know I’m looking for a new job. But no one knows how often I cry about it, or scream alone in the car, or the hamster wheel constantly running inside my head. It feels like my inner mental and emotional life is worlds away from my external presentation. For some reason I’m tearing up at work today so I figured typing this out here would help me get myself together. Good lord I hope I get an interview or something soon. I’m like a dam, and the dam is still strong, but I don’t know how much longer I can go without a crack.
Thanks for listening.
Anon says
I’m so sorry. If your household income is sufficient for your family, consider giving yourself some grace! You are contributing and you are worth more than just your financial contributions. The fact that your salary is lower than your husband does not mean in any way that you are not entitled to spend money.
Could this be a deeper issue than just the salary? To me, the level of anxiety you’re experiencing from this seems like it’s both interfering with your life and is out of proportion to the actual problem – which is (completely legitimate) frustration with your difficulty finding a better paying job.
Anon says
agree that this might be deeper than just the salary – while i don’t know of anyone who would object to earning more $, does your household need more? is your current earnings level preventing you from doing something you want to do OR is this more of a psychological thing that you feel like your own self worth is tied to your salary? if it is the former, it sounds like you are doing the best you can to budget for your family, but if $ is an issue, DH should also be reigning in his spending. If it is the later and this is more of a self worth issue, I strongly encourage you to try to reframe this and see a therapist if necessary. i leaned way out and earn very very little and am able to live a decent life bc of DH’s income and because i was not straddled with student loans. i like what i do and i have a good schedule. sometimes i feel tremendous guilt about this and very very spoiled and like i don’t deserve this. in some ways my income is preventing us from buying a house in a certain neighborhood, but a higher paying job, would likely involve higher stress, longer hours and the need for much more childcare, and would make DH doing his job harder, etc. . i sometimes have to consciously remind myself that i am more than my salary. and while i know people often jump to this, but if you can make room in your budget i do think therapy could help with this.
Anon says
I’m so sorry. I’m in a similar-ish situation, in that I took a way leaned-out job with much lower pay than I could be earning, but I can only imagine how frustrating it can be when you want to ramp up at work and are not finding those opportunities. I think you’re being way too hard on yourself though. You leaned out to be a more present parent while your husband was in Big Law. That IS contributing to the family pot. If your family is financially fine, you really shouldn’t feel like you have to stress about money just because your partner is earning a lot more of it.
ElisaR says
I’m sorry, I totally get what you’re saying. “What has been the point?” has been a refrain of mine in times of transition too. I hope the tide turns for you soon. It will turn it just seems hard to imagine now. But it will. Good luck and hang in there.
ElisaR says
and remember that salary is by no means an indicator of your value as a person.
Pogo says
This. I think this has come up on this board before but we are all high achievers and to me sometimes salary feels like my GPA. I hear about other people with a 4.0 and I feel like a failure, even though in the grand scheme of things, I have more money than the vast majority of people in the world many, many times over.
I agree with others that you have broader anxiety issues tied up w/ self-worth/identity. I’d definitely work on this in therapy. Your mindset is what’s hurting you more, not your actual situation (your feelings are still totally valid – but I don’t think you need to be so stressed).
Boston Legal Eagle says
Hi anon. I’m so sorry you’re feeling this way. I don’t know if this will help as our situations were different, but I felt a lot of this after being laid off after having my first child, and then having to look for a new job while dealing with a new baby. There were often weeks when I cried everyday and felt like a failure. We are brought up here to value work and earning potential above all else, and if you are an overachiever who is used to doing well in school and getting the “good” jobs, it becomes really tied to your sense of self worth. But you are not just your earning potential. You are not just your job title. You are a great mom who is there for your kids and who provides for them, both financially and emotionally. You worked full time and were there for those kids while your spouse was working/away, which is incredibly hard.
Therapy helped me examine a lot of this, so if you are in a position to do so, I would highly recommend it. And you do deserve to spend money on yourself.
Nan says
+1000 to all of this.
Anonymous says
Ugh, I’m sorry this is so hard. I can’t address everything you said regarding your feelings about your earning potential, although I would say, would you judge your husband (or a friend) the same way you judge yourself if the roles were reversed? It took me three, long, painful years to get out of my last job and find my current one, but the new one is great. You never know when this will end but it will end.
OP says
You are all so very, very kind. I really badly needed some anonymous support today and wow did I pick the right place to get it. Thank you. I take everything to heart, and for consideration.
I think the big factors influencing how I feel are 1) we are financially absolutely fine but not “great”–we want to move to a slightly bigger house in the same neighborhood or, less likely, make some improvements to our current home to give us a little more space. We’re not really comfortable doing that unless we have a higher HHI. My husband is at his perfect earning level/family time balance right now and does get raises and bonuses, so that will help, but unless I get something new, it will take many instead of few years to reach this goal comfortably, I believe; 2) I no longer like my job and am tremendously bored; 3) It took me two years to find a job the last time I switched, and yet I have friends who seem to job hop and ascend the ladder so easily (comparison is the thief of joy, etc. etc.).
Again, thank you so much. I’m bookmarking this page. I’m going to need the reminders.
Anon says
Please take the sense of shame out of the picture, if you can. Your salary is just one part of your identity. Anyway, it sounds like your family is doing fine money wise. I’m sure every family would like to make home improvements and could use more $$. I know that’s true for my family. But that isn’t urgent, like wow we have zero emergency funds or could go bankrupt. That’s just a typical money pinch most responsible people experience. Also, please don’t punish yourself and restrict spending just because you contribute less money to the pot. Have a family budget and use it for your needs too. You are worthy! You count! Remember that life is long and there are ups and downs in careers. Try to think about the good in your life. With your determination, you can find a better job eventually. Many of my job searches took way longer than I wanted. I’m sure that’s true for a lot of people – it’s just not something people broadcast to the world.
Anon says
Oh and if it makes you feel better, I also have a boring job and could probably earn a lot more somewhere else. I get the frustration. But I think often in life we have an area of struggle. Rarely do all the stars align and we are rocking it in each area of life. We have to offer ourselves a little acceptance and grace, even while we aim higher.
H13 says
Gift ideas for almost-three-year-old boys? All set on Duplos, trucks, magnatiles, etc. thanks to big brother. Don’t want to add something huge to the house and he doesn’t have a current singular interest to build on.
AwayEmily says
Outside stuff — scooters, balls, kites, sleds, t-ball set.
H13 says
Sled is a great idea. Covered on scooter, balanced bike, t-ball, balls. It is so hard!
AwayEmily says
Another idea: baby doll with accessories (bottle, baby carrier, etc). I feel like playing “baby and parent” peaks at around 3.
Anonymous says
This is what we did for my twin boys when they were three. Mostly so they would stop stealing their older sister’s stuff. We went with a baby doll, bed, change of clothes and bottle. Around 3 they start getting the concept of routines more so they got into putting the dolls to bed before they went to bed. I think we also did an active toy like a slide or scooter in addition in case the dolls weren’t a hit.
H13 says
He really loves his stuffed animals and has one Haba doll. This is a great idea.
Pogo says
Other pretend play stuff that’s a hit for mine: kid-sized garden/outdoor tools (rake, wheelbarrow if you have room for it, shovel). The kid-sized rake I got mine was $5.99 and he won’t stop talking about it. “Mine own rake. I’m helping, mommy!” (jumps in pile of leaves and flings rake in the air)
But yeah, doll stuff is huge. Shoes and hats and stuff that kiddo can put on the doll. If it’s a baby doll, get one w/ its own paci & blankey – kiddo loves finding baby her paci every morning. “Baby lost her paci! Oh no! It felled off, mommy!” Constant source of entertainment.
rosie says
Costco had an elaborate doll crib, stroller, and lots of accessories set that looked awesome last time I was there. Tempted to buy it for my toddler but didn’t want to commit to the footprint in our condo right away.
Emily S. says
The Green Toys wagon has been very popular with both our girls. It can be used inside and outside; it’s a workhorse transporting blocks, dolls, mulch, you name it.
Anonymous says
Does he have a balance bike?
Anon says
So, due to a recent reorganization, I learned I’m getting a promotion and being given leadership responsibilities for my team (as opposed to being the second in command). I’m also expecting our 2nd child next spring and haven’t announced my pregnancy at work yet.
I’d usually have no concerns about announcing to my usual boss, but now reporting lines have changed and I think I have to tell our CEO, just a few weeks after they’ve handed me these new responsibilities. Any advice? I’ll likely be out 4.5 months for maternity leave.
Candidly, if I had known all of this would happen at work, I likely would have postponed TTC for another year to give me a chance to get my bearings in this new role, but it was only communicated after I was already in the throes of first tri misery.
CHL says
Congratulations!! That’s huge! I had a similar thing happen 7 years ago when I was pregnant with my first. Don’t worry about telling them – it may be awkward but they wanted you! 4.5 months is nothing in the grand scheme of things. I would focus on looking at resources on how to transition into managing a team that was formerly peers and setting up a good management cadence (whatever that looks like for you – goals, 1:1 discussions, team meetings, etc.) and then have a good conversation with CEO or your boss about who will cover for you during your leave. There’s a lot of time between now and next spring and you can get on a good path with your team. But most importantly — GO YOU!
Pogo says
Roll with it!! You got this!!
Anonymous says
I had a similar thing happen (I got told about the opportunity right when we decided to try for our second and it started when I was like 6 weeks pregnant). I almost turned it down! But two years in, I love my job and my kids and it’s been amazing. Definitely harder and I make more mistakes. But I got not even minor annoyance from my boss or the CEO when I told them.
I do think it helped that it was my second pregnancy there so they knew I would come back and knew how things would be handled in my absence.
Anon says
Gift help please!
Recommendations for a dollhouse for my 4 year old that will last until whenever it is that kids grow out of liking dollhouses? Would prefer something wood, etc, not plastic. Budget is up to $150 I guess? But cheaper would be great.
Anonymous says
I got a (gently) used one for free. It’s the melissa and Doug one and we love it. Think new it’s ~$100-150 depending on sales.
I bought new people for it and stick a bow on it for my 3 y/o’s Bday and she LOVED it. I put $100 in her college account ;).
Strong recommendation to scour craigslist/facebook for a deal on a used one.
Emily S. says
We bought the Hape All Seasons wooden dollhouse for our daughter’s 4th birthday. Assembly was easy, it’s aesthetically pleasing (important to me since it lives in our family room), came furnished, and you can buy add-ons to keep it fresh. We paid $135. Sometimes the zon has warehouse deals on it, where the box is damaged, and you can get it a bit cheaper.
Seafinch says
The Hape is gorgeous. I gave ours away today, unused after four years (plus $200 worth of accessories)…..my kids just don’t play with toys but it was lovely.
Anonymous says
My 1 year old is in a phase of climbing on the living room furniture and jumping — not allowed because of danger (he has no sense of it) and to prevent damage. Any ideas for managing this besides time-outs for jumping? (We only use time out at this age for dangerous things like hitting and standing on furniture.) My older child, also a boy, just … didn’t do this, ever, so I have no tools in my arsenal. At the moment the level of supervision required at all times is overwhelming and not what I remember from older kid. Is the only solution one of those play yards? I imagine that would just lead to screaming to get out…
Anonymous says
Lean in and get a trampoline? My second had and had way way more energy than my first and third (all girls). She would just go nuts on the trampoline at that age. Still does.
Pogo says
So I have a climber. At over 2yo, I still have gates set up. We did have it constructed as a playard until around age 1 when he got just too mobile and didn’t like being contained in a 2ft x 6 ft space. We deconstructed the yard and used it to gate off our den area from the rest of our open concept kitchen/dining.
This provides some peace of mind for me to cook without fear that he’s going to climb up a bookcase for example (though anything hes attempted to climb we’ve bolted to the wall). But even in the gated, carpeted room without bookcases I still have to watch him now because he can climb up the couch and over the other part of the gate which keeps him from getting at the TV (again, bolted to wall w/ child safety thingy… but still).
I take away anything he uses as a “ladder” and put it in toy time-out; combined with the gates and bolting everything to the wall, that’s really all you can do. And lots of redirection when he climbs something he shouldn’t.
Boston Legal Eagle says
My older one was very into jumping on our sofa when he was 1-2. When we couldn’t go outside or to an indoor playspace to get his energy out, we put the couch cushions down next to the couch so that he could jump off and at least have a semi-soft landing. And yes, baby-proof as much as you can, especially by strapping the heavy furniture. But also, just constant, exhausting supervision. I think someone here once said that having a 1 year old is a mission in suicide prevention (not to make light of true suicide attempts).
Anon says
I have no real solutions, just commiseration. I have girl who is a climber and generally what we would call “spirited” per the discussion the other day. The playyard was our solution until she climbed out of it at 16 months… She is over 2 now, and we still have gates everywhere (mostly as a reminder, not actually effective, because she has learned how to open them, but at least they slow her down?). For us it’s just a mixture of constant vigilance, time out, etc. Just the other day we found her dragging her little chairs to the kitchen as a stool to climb up to try and get in an upper cabinet (she wanted a glass glass, not the plastic glasses we keep at her level) – last week she had done the same thing to investigate the knife block at the back of the counter (which has since been moved). Last night she upended her toy bin, took it to the bathroom and balanced on it like an acrobat (slides are sloped so not stable upside down) to reach all of the confiscated things located behind the faucet on the vanity. So yes to Boston Legal Eagle’s description of constant, exhausting supervision. And lots of locked cabinets and drawers – I recommend slide locks where you can because some 2 year olds (ahem) get strong enough to rip open drawers even with the magnetic locks (2YO vs. 3M tape goes to the 2YO).
Anon says
Toddlers (especially boy toddlers) need to move and climb. Time outs probably won’t work, because he is young and isn’t making a choice to disobey you, he likely can’t help himself. So, you need to provide a safe and acceptable alternative – trampoline, pikler triangle, swing set, etc. (and honestly I just let my boys play in the couch…) Look up “heavy work” and try to incorporate more activities that work his muscles.
Anonymous says
Yep. Three little boys in, I think the answer is to try to keep the house as safe as reasonably possible, keep reiterating safety messages, and not forget to keep an eye out when he’s heading for the kitchen table…. It will pass eventually.
Also, my boys jump around and off the couch a lot too. Lesser of many evils, I guess.
Anonymous says
OP here! Thank you! We have two rooms with couches that are allowed for jumping, but just not the nicer living room furniture. Older boy has always been very active — we do a ton of heavy work and spend a ton of time outside — but his activity was always more purposeful/measured and he’s innately cautious and a rule follower. For him, time outs worked really well for learning not to mess with the blinds, etc, even at this age. This child….. not so much!! I’m now wondering if we just move the offending furniture out of the living room for a while. Who needs chairs??
HSAL says
I have twin 17 month old climbers. For the couch, I agree with putting cushions on the floor. We also swung one couch to face (and touch) the other and let them go to town. Our house is not easily gatable and they’ll take a play yard down, so we basically spend a third of our time at home pulling them off tables.
HSAL says
Oh, and I think a year is too young for a trampoline. They’ll be well over two before I let them use ours.
anon says
Unfortunately, some kids really do need constant supervision. I will say that having a part of the house where gross motor activities could happen, did help. Like scooting around in a Cozy Coupe, flailing on a gymnastics mat, any toys that scoot …
It is hard and exhausting to be a parent of a kid who needs constant motion and activity. Ask me how I know. :)
anon says
First-world problem, here … I need Santa gift ideas for my 5-year-old girl. Ideally $100 or less. We bought a lot of gender-neutral toys for the older kiddo, so we’re good to go on the classics. Bikes/scooters/wheeled things also covered. If she played with dolls more, I’d go full-on American Girl but she is only moderately interested in them. Seems to be more into her princesses and all things Disney. Last year we ended up getting her sleds and snow toys because they needed to be replaced anyway.
Christmas makes me feel like a gross consumer sometimes because my kids want for nothing. We don’t buy tons of extravagant stuff but between birthdays and what they receive from relatives … it feels like enough already. I feel simultaneously guilty for having so much and Scrooge-like for not really wanting to bring more into our house. I dunno, it’s a hard balance.
Anonymous says
Dress up box? We did a wooden box filled with costumes one year. It was a hit, pretty reasonably priced as I got some costumes second hand (Santa gifts have zero packaging). Everything from Doc McStuffins costumes at the disney store to animal hats from the dollar store.
Bit of a side note but on the Santa front, we only let the kids ask for three reasonable sized things. We do let them combine into one larger ask (e.g. all three kids are putting new play kitchen on their list and then two smaller personal items). We also give a gift from us. Older kid has questioned the three things limit but I point out there is only so much room for stuff on the sleigh and she is lucky to have parents who can also buy her stuff and if Santa has room for more than 3 gifts per kid, they should go to other kids who don’t have as much as she does.
SC says
What about consumable items–art supplies, craft kits, science kits, bath paint/crayons, etc?
Pigpen's Mama says
+1 to the dress up box — we have one that developed organically for our 5 year old and it’s well used on playdates.
Chemistry/science kit? Craft or art stuff?
Anonymous says
At that age, can you just ask her what she wants? Sorry if this is obvious.
Anonymous says
My kids are writing letters to Santa (drawing pictures for Santa, only the 6 year old can write more than his name, and spelling is still very questionable). I am totally going to steal gift ideas from them.
AnonATL says
I may be a little late to the comment party for the weekend, but does anyone have suggestions for a baby congratulations gift? I already got them a gift for the shower, but now the little one is actually here. They live in a fairly rural area, so my usual food and grocery delivery is not an option and I’d like to do something other than flowers.
Budget around $50
Anonymous says
Engraved silver frame or a similar keepsake
Anonymous says
Taggies blanket with name and DOB, or stuffie from Jellycat.
Anonymous says
You can send food gifts via amazon – search “gift basket”. As a new first-time mom, my favorite gift would have been either food or a Hanna Anderssen footed sleeper (maybe 3-month size), which I loved but was too poor/cheap to buy myself.