Isabella Oliver Ruched Dress ($79) / Gap Demi Panel Perfect Trouser Pants, $59.95 (take another 35% off today with code CLOCK)/ Gabriella Rocha Ginger 1.75″ Heel ($65) / Adia Kibur Stone Bib Necklace ($72) (or click on the images above)Above, some of our first weekly recommendations for maternity style! As explained in our eBook, A Guide to Dressing Professionally While Pregnant, statement necklaces and comfortable, supportive shoes are a must. Get the book for free by signing up for our newsletter!
Recent NewsSome of the articles of interest to working mothers that we’ve seen around the web recently…
- The NY Post prints one working mother’s response to Gwyneth Paltrow’s recent comments about how easy it is to have an office job and be a working parent.
- Working Mother looks at the real cost of child care (and the career costs of staying home).
- Hellobee looks at pumping essentials for WOHMs.
- Jennifer Senior, author of All Joy and No Fun, recently gave an 18-minute speech for TED about how for parents, happiness is a very high bar.
- Should you delay clamping the umbilical cord? The NYT reports on a new study. They also report on an alarming surge in prescribing opioid painkillers for pregnant women.
- Business Insider tells you nine things you probably didn’t know about 529 plans.
- On the very casual side of things, Ain’t No Mom Jeans suggests three spring transition outfits for nursing/postpartum mamas.
On Corporette Recently…
- We were THRILLED to announce the launch of CorporetteMoms (and, uh, the minor news that Kat’s expecting again).
- We drooled over the Saks Fifth Avenue Friends & Family sale (on through 4/28).
- We pondered the best practices for corporate headshots.
- Mirrors in the office: functional or too vain/girly?
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First comment on CorporetteMoms! I’m so excited about this new extension of Corporette. Thanks, Kat!
Great timing! I’m heading back to work next week and my 12 week old will be starting daycare. Emotionally I feel ok with being away from him and I’m excited about getting back to work, but I’m worried about how he’ll react to a new set of caregivers. Any advise on what I should expect and/or how to make the transition easier for him? He’s breastfed but thus far has no difficulties taking breastmilk from a bottle when dad or grandparents are watching him. I’ve heard that during the first week of daycare babies might refuse to eat during the day and need to constantly nurse at night – anyone had experience with this? Would appreciate any advise from corporettes who’ve been there already. Thanks.
Congrats on the baby! When I went back to work and my baby started daycare, he didn’t refuse to eat (but he has always been a big eater). A couple of tips:
1. Prepare to be sad. I was so excited to go back to work that I only took half of my four month maternity leave, so I was shocked when I started bawling the first time I dropped him off.
2. Make sure your daycare knows how to warm breast milk if you plan to pump. A friend was horrified to see her milk being microwaved.
3. The biggest problem I had was that my daycare center would overfeed my son (seriously, like 3 times as much milk as he would drink at home). I had big time supply problems and after they went through the frozen stash I sent in and the formula I included in my son’s emergency kit in a week, I told them they had to make do with the fresh milk they got daily. It was very frustrating, and I wish I had been more assertive about it sooner. You know your baby better than they do.
4. My life also got more streamlined when I started bringing in all his gear for the week on Monday, saving me the trouble of packing a bag every night.
Hope this helps!
Hugs mama! Even if you’re excited to go back, this can be a hard transition.
With both of my kids, the first few weeks were bumpy as we figured out routines, etc. but I came to realize (both times) that children thrive on routine. So even if your kiddo is nervous or uncomfortable with your care provider at first, it’ll become second nature for him/her eventually.
I breastfed both of my babies and I second the advice about making sure your daycare really knows how to handle/manage a breastfed baby. This means: slow (paced) feeding, slow-flow nipples, frequent burping, etc. I know first-hand that there’s nothing more stressful to a pumping mama than feeding that isn’t going as planned! Feel free to post here again with more questions, too. And GOOD LUCK!
Hi Dhl – not sure if you’re still reading, but the transition to daycare CAN go very smoothly. I had heard about babies refusing to eat or nap, so I was also worried how my 3.5 mo old would do. Turns out, she did much better than me on the first day! My daycare allowed me to spend time in the infant room before my daughter officially started — is that an option for you? Spending a couple hours observing the caretakers’ interactions with the infants made me confident that they would be able to handle tricky feedings or other issues if they arose. Even if your son doesn’t love daycare right away, it seems most babies do adjust quickly (a couple days to a week).
Also, I was excited to go back to work, too, but still cried when I left her the first morning. Caught me completely off-guard.
Good luck! The first couple of weeks were pretty hard emotionally and physically – just adjusting to the schedule.
The biggest issue I had with school/daycare was overfeeding. My daughter was exclusively breastfed and she LOVES to eat. If allowed, she’d take a 9 oz bottle (somehow that happened one time). She was getting overfed – part of it was my fault for not asking the school to limit her consumption. For breastfeeding, pumping, and day care advice, I highly recommend the Kelly Mom website. Here’s an article from the site that discusses bottle feeding the breastfed baby: http://kellymom.com/bf/pumpingmoms/feeding-tools/bottle-feeding/
I had to do my research to learn how much she was supposed to be eating – and its only about 1-1.5 oz per hour of separation. I worked with the school to limit her intake and get her back to that amount. During growth spurts, she would definitely nurse more at night – which was a bit of a pain. However, we had her sleeping in our room and whenever she woke up, I brought her to our bed to nurse and would fall back to sleep.
If you don’t have a pumping room or are pumping in your own office, I highly recommend getting a small refrigerator. This will save you much time – you won’t need to disassemble the pump after each session and its easier for storing the milk.
I also bought the car adaptor and kept batteries in the pack. There have been many times I was pumping in a restroom stall or in the car. Be assertive and let people know when you need a break. Good luck!
Philanthropy Girl says
Does anyone have any advice on good shoes for work while pregnant? I work in a pretty business casual environment (I typically wear slacks & a blouse with flats). My flats aren’t giving my feet enough support now that I’m getting so heavy. I’m open to a new pair of shoes, if the price is right, but wondering if Dr. Sholl’s might be a better option.
Check out Zappos and search OrthoHeel.
Philanthropy Girl says
Try a flat with a hidden wedge. Ecco makes one that is great. Good luck!
Ciao, pues says
So glad for this new forum, Kat!
Pumping moms: any recommendations for pump-friendly office wear? I normally wear dresses and blazers to work, but my dresses seem like the least pump-friendly option as I’d have to unzip to the waist. Doable, but not ideal. The nursing dresses I’ve seen in-store and online look so casual. Any office appropriate pumping dresses you love? Or should I transition to wearing slacks and button-front tops?
Ahhh pumping wear! I just hung up the horns [on my Medela] so I have a lot of ideas here. You’re right in that a skirt or pants are more doable than a dress, though I had a lot of pump-friendly dresses. I never bought nursing-specific clothing — instead, I went for a cowl or v-neck that could be easily pulled down so I could shove the girls up, out, and into my pumping apparatus (how’s that for a mental image?). I’ll post some links separately to avoid moderation.
And a third: the knit matte jersey dress at Landsend (ID# 262714)
I realize all of these assume your office is NOT business dress in terms of dress code. Still, this is pretty much the kind of stuff I always wore while pumping. Even when I wore a skirt and top (or pants and a top), I preferred stuff you could pull down vs. pulling up/off.
Here’s another: http://www.landsend.com/products/womens-pattern-knit-shirred-surplice-dress/id_265425?sku_0=::93H
Ciao, pues says
Thanks, ANP! I love that third one.
I found that nursing clothing didn’t work well for pumping. I generally just wore loose shirts that I could pull up. I avoided buttons or dresses – didn’t want to undress to pump.
I pumped for a year after my son was born….I found that wrap dresses with nursing camisoles (or anything with a nursing camisole underneath) where the easiest to wear when pumping. I pumped in my office, either sitting at my desk or sitting on my couch, so you might have different needs if you are pumping in some sort of shared space — but I found that I could just loosen my dress a bit, unhook the straps of my nursing camisole, and go to town. I also liked the fact that my wrap dresses had room in them on the days were my breasts were engorged (typically when I was in the middle of a meeting out of the office that ran much longer than it should have). Cardigans with button down shirts underneath were also useful (and anything with an open front. I did have a few specialized “nursing” dresses that I would wear to work but I didn’t find that I absolutely needed them. I never managed to find too many that fit my style. One time I wore a fitted sleeveless dress with a long sleeved top underneath. You should have seen the acrobatics I went through to gain access. Never made that mistake again.
Meg Murry says
I’m really happy this site exists now! My only concern is the layout is terrible on my phone, which is my typical way of reading the main site – there is a ton of white space on each side of the words and very few words in the center of the screen. Although I know there have been complaints about being able to follow threads on the main site – the current layout of the moms site is really not good at all for my phone.
Also, any thoughts on whether there will be an RSS feed, at least to let us know when there is a new post?
Looking forward to posting and reading posts here. I have often felt just slightly off-topic posting parenting and TTC and infertility topics at Corporette, since it’s not all moms, but at the same time I really value the insights from this reader group. I’m glad I can post these topics here and not feel like I’m turning off any commenters!
I just found out we are expecting (after quite a long road of trying with lots of ups and downs!). I’m thrilled (and terrified). One complication — I am in that period in my career, and my current job specifically, where I am looking to take the next step because I have grown out of my current role. I’ve gotten quite a bit of traction internally (offers from other groups, etc). But, now I am pregnant (personally, yay! professionally, yikes!), and I would expect that the position move would firm up around this summer (I expect right around the time I will be showing!). Any advice on whether or not to share the news that I am expecting as I am looking for the right next step? How have you ladies broached this topic — even if not re: new positions, perhaps re: coveted projects, etc? I’m so grateful for any insight or advice you have!
Ciao, pues says
Congratulations! What wonderful news!
Your work speaks for itself, and you have obviously impressed people! I think it’s a really generous impulse to want to share your news before taking a next step, but I would advise against it until you have an offer in-hand. Unfortunately, news of this sort will likely send a hiring group’s mind to their bottom line, and they could start thinking of you as a liability in terms of maternity leave and returning to work. My opinion is that if you want to make a move, then you should proceed in that direction, pregnancy notwithstanding. The fact that you’re having a baby is a reality of working women and does not change the fact that you are awesome at your job. I think the more women who are both awesome at their jobs AND moms/moms-to-be, rather than being awesome at their jobs BUT moms/moms-to-be, the better off we all are.
Sheryl Sandberg says “Don’t leave before you leave,” about women who decline opportunities to advance because they are thinking of starting families (link to follow). You are already pregnant, so it’s not exactly on point, but I think the message is the same. If you want to make a move, make one! There is no reason to take a step back unless you want to.
Ciao, pues says
“Don’t leave before you leave.” http://postcards.blogs.fortune.cnn.com/2009/10/05/facebook-coo-sheryl-sandberg-unedited/
Man, I am all over this thread. Apologies.
So — congrats on the baby AND on the career move! Good for you. I think this is when you thank your lucky stars that you’ve been a great worker in your career up until now, because my feeling is that any good boss isn’t going to pass over giving an awesome person a promotion/job advancement just b/c she’s currently pregnant.
I would say: announce the pregnancy when it’s good for you. I’d also suggest you make it clear (as much as you can) that you’re very interested in this new position, here’s what you can bring to the table, etc., preferably before you announce.
Another suggestion: know your office culture. Is there someone — a supervisor or mentor — who can be your champion and help guide you in this? Either someone who’s been down the road before, or whom you can take into your confidence about the pregnancy SLIGHTLY earlier than you might broadcast the news to the rest of the office? Then s/he might be able to give you some tips on navigating these waters.
I agree with Ciao’s advice to go for the new position without disclosing your pregnancy. I was in a somewhat similar situation during my pregnancy: two months before my due date, I received a promotion and learned I would be moving to a new group within my company. I immediately disclosed my pregnancy to my future manager, and we decided together that I would officially move to the new position after I returned from maternity leave. Yes, that meant the position would be vacant for another 5 months, but as Ciao notes, that the reality of working women who decide to have children and companies are (or should be) used to it. The whole process was completely matter-of-fact; I didn’t apologize for the pregnancy or shorten my planned leave. I hope it works out for you!
Ciao, ANP and FVNA – THANK YOU! It’s funny, I was just reading the weekend post about how some commenters felt that the site was getting “less intelligent” (I am paraphrasing, and not offering an opinion here), and then I came here and found thoughtful, intelligent, kind responses to my questions. I am so grateful that Kat put this site up (selfishly, because it is so timely for me as a first time, terrified, mom AND someone who is on the upswing at work right now (thanks, Ciao, for reminding me to use “and” instead of “but”). I hope to contribute as much as I receive, and I’m glad we are all here!
We’re starting the preschool search (not in NYC so it’s not hyper-intensive).
I’m thinking about putting together a spreadsheet to keep track of each school as we visit. Something that includes name, location, price, notes/impressions, pros/cons, etc. Have any of you already created something like this and be willing to share?
Here’s the list I used — hope it helps! I put this list together based on the criteria required for my state’s top accreditation.
1. Holiday schedule
3. License and accreditation. Is the certification posted at facility? Any violations posted?
4. Caregiver to child ratio? How are caregivers assigned to children? What is the turnover?
5. Staff training requirements? Background checks?
6. Screen time policy for infants?
7. Kitchen: clean, labeled milk, food allergies noted?
8. How does staff engage with children (e.g., active engagement v. cell phone convo)?
9. Overall impressions of facility
10. How are sick children handled? Is there a doctor or nurse on staff or available?
11. Immunizations required?
12. Emergency/evac procedures?
13. Who can pick up children?
14. How often are toys washed and cleaned? Bedding?
15. Do caregivers wear gloves when changing diapers?
16. One child per crib?
17. Monthly fee? Late pickup fee?
18. Drop ins allowed?
19. Written copy of daycare policies?
20. Smaller groups with caregiver (e.g., 4:1 versus 8:2)?
Has anybody here had an experience with gender disappointment? I am having my 2nd (and final) baby, and I was desperately hoping for a girl, as I have a boy already. I found out that it’s another boy. I feel terrible (TERRIBLE) for not being anything other than completely thrilled with another healthy baby, but I can’t help but feel an incredible sense of loss for the daughter I will never have. And I’ve always felt that the bond between a mother and daughter is so much stronger than a mother and son. Am I nuts?!