Maternity Monday: Jersey Maternity/Nursing Dress
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All right, ladies, let’s discuss: yea or nay for maxi dresses as workwear when you’re pregnant? Here are the pros, as I see them: All pregnant women look amazing in maxi dresses, and they can be a very easy solution to other things that may bother you while pregnant, such as feeling sensitive about leg veins or giving a great big NOPE to wearing heels while pregnant. The cons: Well, they’re maxi dresses, which make many people think of the beach. Like so many things, I think this comes down to your office — I wore a long maxi dress similar to this to my business-casual nonprofit-law job back in my first pregnancy, but I tried to layer it with a cardigan, shrunken blazer, and professional jewelry. Even then it was only for casual days in my casual office. I like that this one has a modesty panel for easy nursing, as well — and it’s only $98, available in black and navy. (Try it with a shrug like this one if proportions feel off when you try to layer.) Nom Maternity Jersey Maternity/Nursing Dress
Psst: Today is the start of Nordstrom’s “Personal 10 Points Day” offer. From now through 6/19, you can choose one day to earn 10 points per dollar (instead of 2 per dollar) with your Nordstrom card at Nordstrom and Nordstrom Rack — in stores or online. (To use at Nordstrom.com, just select your preferred date in Checkout.) Some suggestions on what to check out from the Workwear Hall of Fame: this $150 blazer, this dress marked to $65, these $98 pumps, these $99 pumps, these $85 wedges, and this $150 tote bag.
Building a maternity wardrobe for work? Check out our page with more suggestions along both classic and trendy/seasonal lines.
(L-all)
Sales of note for 1/16:
(See all of the latest workwear sales at Corporette!)
- Nordstrom – Cashmere on sale; AllSaints, Free People, Nike, Tory Burch, and Vince up to 60%; beauty deals up to 25% off
- AllSaints – now up to 60% off (some of the best leather jackets!)
- Ann Taylor – Up to 40% off your full-price purchase; extra 50% off sale
- Banana Republic Factory – 50% off everything + extra 20% off
- Boden – 15% off new styles with code — readers love this blazer, these dresses, and their double-layer line of tees
- DeMellier – Sale now on, free shipping and returns — includes select options like Montreal, Vancouver, and Venice
- Eloquii – $29 and up select styles; extra 50% off all clearance, plus ELOQUII X kate spade new york collab just dropped
- Everlane – Sale of the year, up to 70% off — reader favorites include their scoop tee, Dream Pant, ReNew Transit backpack, silk blouses and oversized blazers! New markdowns just added
- Hannah Andersson – Up to 30% off all pajamas;
- J.Crew – Up to 40% off select styles; up to 50% off cashmere
- J.Crew Factory – 40-70% off everything
- L.K. Bennett – Archive sale, almost everything 70% off
- M.M.LaFleur – Tag sale for a limited time — jardigans and dresses $200, pants $150, tops $95, T-shirts $50
- Spanx – Lots of workwear on sale, some up to 70% off
- Talbots – Semi-Annual Red Door Sale – 50% off + extra 20% off, sale on sale, plus free shipping on $150+
And — here are some of our latest threadjacks of interest – working mom questions asked by the commenters!
- The concept of “backup care” is so stupid…
- I need tips on managing employees in BigLaw who have to leave for daycare pickup…
- I’m thinking of leaning out to spend more time with my family – how can I find the perfect job for that?
- I’m now a SAHM and my husband needs to step up…
- How can I change my thinking to better recognize some of my husband’s contributions as important, like organizing the shed?
- What are your tips to having a good weekend with kids, especially with little kids? Do you have a set routine or plan?
I am 38 weeks pregnant, and I have been surviving on leggings and maxi skirts for most of the 3rd trimester, with some more dressy-business casual items thrown in here and there. (I am short, so I have had a hard time finding maxi dresses that didn’t need to be hemmed, but I can pull up a skirt.) I wear dressy pants and dresses (like nice ones) occasionally, but at this point, I am down to wearing sandals every day because of puffy feet.
My office is business casual during the week (although no specific dress code guidelines), and casual on Friday. I am definitely casual every day at this point; I would normally NEVER wear sandals to office, but I am not buying new pregnancy shoes with less than 2 weeks to my due date. I am holed up in my office drafting a huge brief all day right now, so no clients really see me, and if they did, I still look cute, even if not formal. I still wear makeup, fix my hair, have a nice pedicure, etc. Maybe I am just really lucky (or delusional), but I feel like people are grateful that this far along in my pregnancy I am here working hard and accomplishing things. I feel great and I am getting stuff done, so no one has said anything.
I posted late last week about a rough daycare transition. Although it will definitely be a process, there were NO TEARS this morning, and oh my, it just feels so much better that I don’t leave on that note and have that rough good-bye hanging on mood all day! Thanks for the tips, ladies.
Bizarre question that makes me wonder if I am missing a taste bud– what is the difference between sour and bitter? Like, how does it FEEL different? What foods are sour and what foods are bitter? I described something to my toddler recently as sour and my friend was like, no, that’s bitter (I think it was about an orange peel) and I realized I have no idea what the difference is.
Adding to the big life questions here today, especially about “having it all,” what do you do when you are stuck in the slog of little kids, a marriage and a job? My kids are not babies any more, but still need hands on attention (2 and 4). There are likely no more babies in our future, so no more counting down trimesters, marking life by months, and anxiously waiting to hit the next stage – while knowing it’s all going so fast.
Now, it’s negotiating the same temper tantrums from my 2 year old, and sibling fights, and who has to do the dishes, and endless cooking dinners and lunches for little picky eaters (not just procuring baby food). We aren’t worrying about CIO, now it’s waking up for bad dreams, or wetting the bed. I have a steady, low hour job, so that’s not the issue. Husband could probably work a little less, but has flexibility and great prospects. But I feel stuck – still exhausted (see above re nightmares) and worn down, with little personal time.
Maybe I should put this on the other site and get more responses from people who are on the other side of little kids, but any thoughts here?
I have often heard that being a working mom means feeling like you aren’t doing a good job at anything.
But I am overwhelmed by that feeling right now, and I don’t even work a particularly demanding job (40 hrs a week) and only one kid. How do you make peace with the idea that you are never going to be able to do all the very worthy things that you would like to do? It doesn’t seem unreasonable to want to succeed at work, spend time with my kid, spend alone time with my husband, do some exercise, take care of my house and yard, cook healthy meals, try not to destroy the environment completely with disposable/packaged items, be there for my friends and family, do some sort of good in the community, and engage in a leisure activity now and then. Yet, it is proving to be totally impossible do all these things at the level at which I would like to do them. I realize that’s a pretty obvious “no one can have it all at the same time” conclusion that has been analyzed to death, but the question is how to be OK with that as it plays out in your own life. How do you decide what to compromise? How do you move forward and not hate yourself when you eff something up at work or forget a close friend’s birthday or end up buying takeout for dinner every night for a week?
It has been a bad morning, in case you can’t tell.
I know it’s been discussed before here and on the main site, but any current recommendations for podcasts, sites, blogs, etc for moms, working moms, working women, or just generally? I’m on maternity leave and I’ve been spending WAY too much time on another blog for moms that’s WAY too negative, and I need a find a few more positive sources (in addition to this one, which i love, so thank you!).
Posting here because I really don’t have anyone to talk to about this in real life.
Things are tough right now in my marriage. We have an almost two year old, busy work schedules, and live in a high-stress, HCOL area. I’m on reduced schedule, but it’s in Big Law, so that means I’m working every weekday, just not nights and weekends, usually. Husband works longer hours, but we make about the same amount of money. He’s reasonably good about hands-on toddler duty when he’s around, but I do the vast majority of planning and grunt work and am the default parent. I suck at balancing my work and home life — the house is always in slight to major disarray, and that’s only because we have a house cleaner every two weeks. I’m barely working out three days a week, and we do take out for dinner far to frequently.
But we keep having the same fight — namely my husband complaining about how ‘we’ aren’t making physical fitness a priority and ‘we’ keep the house too messy. I hear this as him blaming ME for all this, but then he says he’s not saying that when I call him on it. He keeps saying he needs me to be pushing him to work out and eat better, and when he asks if I’ve worked out that day and I haven’t, he starts in on how working out used to be a priority to me, but it’s not anymore and that I ‘sold him a bill of goods’. Same fight last night, this time over the phone since he’s out of town (again) for several days. Hung up on bad terms, but he’s since texted/emailed acting as if everything is okay. Sometime we fight about money, mostly when I point out we’ve got more going out than coming in, and he makes comments about how I chose to reduce my hours. But then also complains about how I work too much now and that his job is more important/harder than mine (it’s not, btw).
Then other times he’s as sweet as can be, says how this is the hardest time, etc.etc. And there are good times.
I finally said we need to see a counselor, but he sees this as a sign that things are just over. I am doubtful that he’ll actually go into the sessions with an open mind.
I also realized last night that it really doesn’t matter if he’s right or not — I’ve been arguing that the messy home, lack of working out, and not spending our weekends hiking and biking and such are par for the course when you have a toddler and two working parents. But that’s not the point — I’m so sick of what feels like constant criticism. I think if it wasn’t working out and the messy house, it would be something else and it would be my fault. And it’s not healthy to be in a relationship like that.
I don’t know if counseling will even help. I’m starting to think that maybe divorce is the least-worst option. I’m scared of how that would impact our daughter, and it would gut me to not see her everyday, and I’d feel like a total failure and my parents would be disappointed. But I also can’t continue like this and I certainly can’t let my daughter think this is a normal dynamic.
So, right now I can’t talk to anyone about this — I’m embarrassed, I don’t want people to think poorly of my husband, I don’t want to seem like I’m a pushover, I don’t have any friends who have divorced with kids. But I had to just get it out, even anonymously, although I’m terrified someone will recognize me. So I’m posting before I can change my mind and delete this.
Am the only person who hates maxi dresses/skirts? If it’s warm enough to want to wear one (bare arms, etc.), then I feel like I’m sporting a sauna on the bottom half. Invariably, I end up with the skirt hiked up, or even tied in a knot to allow air flow. I simply don’t get it.
Question: my son will be 4.5 in August. His school has a two week break between end of summer and beginning of fall. We used to live about 2 hours driving from my parents, and had no problem sending him down there for 3-4 days while we were gone (back when he was 3.5). Now we live an airplane ride away. He’s GREAT on planes, and great in general, and loves spending time at his grandparents, but for some reason we feel nervous about having them fly with him from our town back to where they live and then back to us for 4 days away. Probably because if he did get homesick, we couldn’t just be there in a few hours. Should be get over it and let them take him?
I was in IT when pregnant and the only time my bosses saw me in a maxi dress was during a business trip to Vegas in July…and even then it was only after the “work” portion of the day was done.
Nay in my book.
I posted a while ago about my mother in law visiting on a work day with limited notice and telling me I was a bad mom as dishes were not done and vacuuming was not done. (Husband did not get yelled at in case anyone was wondering).
We were between maids at the time and the dishwasher had just broken. Landscaping was late and had been a no show for ten days. I will freely admit house wasn’t that great looking but it wasn’t unsafe or disgusting (had been professionally cleaned two weeks earlier). Like, I wouldn’t have been ashamed about the state of the house if someone had stopped by until I got yelled at.
Though I totally get that just not doing dishes for three days when the dishwasher breaks is not responsible. Haha…
We had been invited to visit the in laws that weekend for a important family event and I asked advice about going (not go, send husband and baby, send husband alone, no one go etc). Appreciated the advice.
Anyway, we all went (one family member was quite ill and it’s good that person got to see baby for the first and probably last time). Baby does not sleep without me so we are kind of a package deal so I had to go. Mother in law apologized twice.
It’s been a while and honestly I am still on edge about the whole thing. It’s very stressful having anyone visit now and we’ve spent a lot on improving stuff in our house and on increased help. And there is immediate stress about things… Like if my husband leaves a plate on the table instead of putting it in the dishwasher I get mad as apparently people judge me about the plate and not him. He likes to cook and that is a constant source of anger because I would rather he not cook because I just don’t want to deal with the mess on any level. (Food has never been something I’ve cared about). So we are eating out more and ordering delivery stuff which makes him unhappy because apparently cooking was one of his “joys in life”.
And there is a lot of rage as why are the dishes my problem- the husband should deal with them with the fifteen hours less a week that he works. Same goes for laundry and vacuuming and arranging people to help with housework and yard work and buying a dishwasher. Why can’t he do/arrange any of it?
Just a lot of stress, tension and anxiety about stupid things.
I feel at times like I didn’t marry an equal. Like- he is not contributing as much financially, he is not working as many hours, at best he spends as much time with the baby as me (though I arrange all babies classes, play dates, daycare and packed lunch and get up with him at night), and he does really nothing else for housework other than cook. And I feel like that is becoming a source of major resentment. Thoughts?
My office dress code is very fluid – technically we’re business casual, but women dress much more casually than that. I did wear maxi dresses a few times (after seeing more senior women do the same), but we do have a no sleeveless/tank policy, so I layered with a light cardigan. I still felt underdressed, although I really wasn’t – it was more of the casual mindset for me. Being 9 months pregnant in August, however, I just went with the maxi dress and didn’t care too much.
I didn’t wear them, probably could have on Fridays, but I’d say if you’re going to do it, better to pair with a long blazer and maybe a long necklace for a more intentional, fashionable look than a shrug which just says “I’m wearing a maxi dress but I either hate my arms or am cold” (at least to me).
I wore maxi dresses to work all the time while I was pregnant (and before I got pregnant), but my office has a casual dress code. Not sure I would wear them in a business casual office. To me, maxi dresses are the definition of casual.
I think you can “get away” with a lot of things when you are pregnant, but for what it’s worth, maxi dresses were among several specific clothing items banned entirely on casual Friday at the public accounting firm I worked at. This was a business casual firm where the only time people (other than partners) wore suits was when seeing clients.