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Updated: Nov 1, 2018 74 Comments · by

Maternity Monday: Ivybridge Maternity Dress

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maternity workwear red dressHappy Monday! This red dress looks like the perfect maternity dress for work — nice high neckline, a work-appropriate length, flattering pleats for the bump, and three-quarter sleeves. Gorgeous! The dress is $149 at Nordstrom, available in dark gray and red. Isabella Oliver ‘Ivybridge’ Jersey Maternity Dress

Sales of note for 9.10.24

(See all of the latest workwear sales at Corporette!)

Kid/Family Sales

  • Carter’s – Birthday sale, 40-50% off & extra 20% off select styles
  • Hanna Andersson – Up to 50% off all baby; up to 40% off all Halloween
  • J.Crew Crewcuts – Extra 30% off sale styles
  • Old Navy – 40% off everything
  • Target – BOGO 25% off select haircare, up to 25% off floor care items; up to 30% off indoor furniture up to 20% off TVs

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Comments

  1. twin mom says

    My six month olds have started solids and are adjusting to getting some formula (we do two bottles of milk and two bottles half milk / half formula per day.. they have taken a while to get used to formula). For several reasons, including wanting the ability to take migraine medication, I’d like to start a long, slow weaning process.

    I currently pump 4 times a day (I do not nurse anymore), and am trying to move down to three times. I’ve done it for two days and it’s not comfortable, but not terrible. I know it varies person to person, but any idea how long it’ll take for my body to get accustomed to losing a pumping session? I typically get 10 ounces/pumping session (but much more first thing in the morning). I’m trying to do 6am, 1 pm, 8:30pm.

    Thanks!

    • Anonymous says

      How long do you pump each time? You may have better luck cutting down your supply by first doing 4 shorter sessions (don’t pump yourself empty) for a week or so and then going to three sessions. So if you were pumping 4 times a day at 20 minutes each, switch to 4 times a day at 15 minutes each and then a week later switch to 3 times a day at 20 minutes each.

      Also, if formula adjust isn’t going well maybe try a different one. My half BF-half FF twins preferred Nestle Good Start Concentrate (was same cost as powder but they hated the powder).

      • Anon at 11:01 says

        Also, you are my hero for pumping and working and handling twins. I could barely get myself and the twins dressed and out the door everyday at that age.

    • MSJ says

      I exclusively bf/pumped for my twins for nine months and i gave myself a week to drop each session before completely weaning at twelve months.
      I had a strong/oversupply and got mastitis when the twins started solids and started demanding less milk so I was very cautious to go slowly
      I shortened sessions before dropping them but it’s difficult to coordinate with work schedules and not a perfect science
      Good luck! It’s so freeing to drop pumps and i wish I started at 6 mos rather than 9/10.

    • OP says

      Thank you for the responses so far. I really appreciate it, especially since my hormones are all over the place, and between that and the news in recent days I have an overwhelming feeling that I am cutting back on the only thing I can do to keep my babies safe in this world…

      Welcome any other ideas!

      • goldy says

        When my EP/formula-fed twins were 6 mos, I cut back from 4 pumping sessions (producing 50 oz) to morning and night pretty quickly — maybe over 2 weeks. As a consequence, my production at my morning and night sessions dropped pretty quickly, so I really was only able to produce 1 daily bottle for each kid until they were 8/9 months.

        FYI — knock on wood, but my husband was just saying how in 3 years, our twins have collectively had only 1 ear infection. At the time, I was kinda stressed about cutting back on breast milk because I wanted to give them all the health benefits of going to 1 year, but my work schedule shifted and it would have meant less time with them if I stayed at work to pump. Now, with the benefit of hindsight, it seems like it was such a no brainer to cut the work pump sessions, but I struggled with it then. And 6 mos was plenty for us!

        • OP says

          Thank you, goldy! So good to hear. It’s incredible how disruptive it is to pump twice during the work day, and the worst part is that it can keep you from goign home asap to see the kids you are pumping for!

      • Meg Murry says

        The key with cutting pumping sessions is to not pump to empty – so if milk stops flowing that 15/20 minute session, turn off the pump then, note how long that was, and shoot for that time or a little shorter tomorrow at that session.

        My only tips are to wear nursing pads (and keep spares around) in case your schedule shift means leaking, and if you start to feel uncomfortably engorged (especially in the middle of the night) to hand pump or hand express just until you aren’t in pain anymore – but again, not all the way to empty.

        And another “good for you! – pumping is a pain, and I struggled doing it for 1 kid, let alone 2. Don’t feel guilt for wanting to stop, especially if you need migraine medication – what your kids need most is a healthy, calm mother.

        Have you talked to the Infant Risk center about your migraine medication? They have done studies on some of the most common medications and some transfer a lot into your milk while others have much lower levels transferred. It’s probably worth a call to see if there is a medication that has a low transfer to milk rate that works for you. Here is an old thread from there about migraine medication, but calling to get the most current information would be better: http://www.infantrisk.com/forum/forum/medications-and-breastfeeding-mothers/other-uncategorized-medications/152-migraine-medications

        • OP says

          good tips!

          Luckily I don’t need the meds yet, but I can feel that I’m experiencing a hormonal shift and starting to feel pressure in my head, which means that I will probably start getting migraines soon. When that happens, I want to be able to take whatever is effective (which for me has included Botox, which almost nobody will give a nursing/pregnant woman).

          I think this timing is right for me and I’m not in a big pinch – just trying to avoid being in one!

    • grey falcon says

      Everyone has already offered good advice, so mostly commiseration. But it might help to think about dropping one of the day sessions by “stretching” your time between. E.g.: at work until the Bub was about seven months old, I was pumping at 10, 1, and 4 (I think). So when I wanted to drop a session, I started by moving the 10 am later and the 4pm earlier. It was then easy to drop that middle session pretty quickly. I did the same when I wanted to bump down to 1 day pumping session, and the finally was able to just move to morning and night feeding, where we’ve been steady for several months.

      • Meg Murry says

        Yes, or along the same lines, once you’ve adjusted to going from 4 to 3, when you want to go down to just 2 it might be easiest to just start pushing back that 1 pm session until it becomes an after work session, at which point it would meld into the 8:30 session.

        • Anonymous says

          Makes sense.

          Thanks again, everyone!

          I just can’t believe this will eventually go down to nothing. The body is crazy.

    • anon says

      I did not have twins, but was briefly exclusively pumping and it took me a full month to go from 6 pumping sessions per day to 0. I did the drop one pump every few days to a week method rather than shortening sessions, because that gave me clogged ducts.

    • octagon says

      also if you are not already, take lecithin capsules a few times a day which will reduce the risk of clogged ducts.

  2. CPA Lady says

    I love that dress. Anyone know of a non-maternity version of a dress very similar to that, including the color? If I ever got pregnant again, I think I’d just buy 4 more Isabella Oliver dresses and rotate through them every single week. The one Isabella Oliver dress I got was my favorite maternity outfit, the one maternity item I kept, and I still wear it almost weekly.

    • anne-on says

      If you find one please let me know, I’d buy it in a heartbeat. I’m 4+ years post partum and my tummy area still refuses to return to its previous dimensions.

    • Legally Brunette says

      I would check out Baukjen, the non-maternity sister line to Isabella Oliver. I have some store credit at IO and I can use it at Baukjen (given that I’m no longer pregnant and have no more use for maternity clothes!).

    • FTMinFL says

      No suggestion for a non-maternity dress, but the buy-5-dresses-rotate-each-week routine is exactly what I did. It was boring, but I felt like I looked good and it was one less thing to think about!

  3. Fathers' day! says

    What is everyone doing? This is the first year we don’t have a tiny baby and I’d love to do something fun and meaningful.

    • Spirograph says

      Not ON fathers day, but “in honor of fathers day” later that week taking the day off to go to a local theme park with the kids. My husband loves roller coasters and I can’t ride with him this summer because I’m pregnant, but we can do all the tame stuff with the kids and he can go fast pass his way on to some good ones, too.

      Also making his favorite cake and letting him sleep in. That’s about as good as it gets right now.

  4. (was) due in June says

    I had this dress in black. I wore it probably once a week for months, including to court. Absolutely worth it.

  5. worried. says

    If you wise women can help me – I’m somewhat panicked. My husband recently had a battery of tests as part of his physical – elevated levels of something in his liver prompted more tests. One was for hepatitis b. We received two letters on this. One said that the Hep B antibody “titer” was under 10, and so he might have hep b. A second letter, timestamped from about 20 minutes later, described blood results and said, “there is no indication that you have ever had hep B or hep C.”
    In light of the second letter, I can’t make sense of the first. I am really freaked out.

    • Meg Murry says

      He needs to call the doctor’s office and tell them he got these letters, then ask them to explain what it means. If it was really a problem, they probably would have called him in, not just sent him a letter, unless there was a major snafu along the way.

      I believe the antibody titer level refers to whether he ever received the HepB vaccine and if it was effective – but I’m not a doctor and could be mistaken. A phone call to the doctor’s office is going to be the fastest and clearest way to get an answer to this.

      • worried. says

        Thank you so much. In addition to the health concern, I’m very worried that this could mean he is cheating.

    • FTMinFL says

      I work with serology results daily, and I find the way the first letter is worded to be strange. I would see someone with an antibody titer < 10 and think that they need a booster vaccine, not that they may have been exposed. Definitely follow up with the doctor, but it doesn't sound like you have anything to worry about.

      • worried. says

        I appreciate this a lot. Thank you. I may be paraphrasing the first (and second) letter incorrectly. It did say something about ‘if you wish to get another vaccine it’s up to you.’

        • FTMinFL says

          That sounds more like it. Many HCPs auto-generate letters when serology results indicate a booster is needed since most adults do not work in professions that require proof of recommended vaccines. FWIW, “10” is typically the lower limit of detection for most serology tests, so a test result of “<10" is generally treated as "negative" for practical purposes. The doctor should be able to explain all of this to you and put you at ease.

  6. RDC says

    Question about raising shy kids. Sorry in advance for the novel.

    Growing up, my mom always referred to me as shy and to herself as being “painfully shy” as a kid. I feel like this was a self-fulfilling prophesy that I’ve really struggled with – I’m an introvert and have had to work hard at chitchat and networking / social skills. Growing up, I felt like I was “doomed” to struggling with social situations because my parents did, and so would I.

    My son is now 18 months and is starting to show signs of shyness / stranger danger. (Which could just be age-specific.) But I’ve already found myself explaining – generally to other adults, when he’s hiding behind my legs – that he’s shy or slow to warm up to new people. Which is true, but I also don’t want him to absorb from me that he’s “shy”. This all goes to a deeper nature / nurture discussion, but what do you say in that situation? How much do you worry that your comments about your kids shape the way they view themselves?

    • Closet Redux says

      I have a not-at-all-shy 2 and a half year old and I can confirm that the stranger danger might just be age-appropriate and something he’ll grow out of, as mine did.

      In any event, you are so wonderful to take into consideration how labeling his behavior as a personality trait might affect him in the future. I feel like the most person-affirming thing to do is to do nothing at all– you do not have to explain to anyone why he is hiding behind your legs or refusing to say hello. Say nothing! Barring that (and I know there are certainly situations in which you feel you must say something), try labeling the behavior rather than the boy, i.e. he’s “feeling” shy, rather than he “is” shy. It’s a small shift, and the nuance is probably lost on everyone in the moment, but in the long run it will give him the tools to talk about his feelings, and the knowledge that feelings can be fleeting and that he is welcome to change them.

        • Meg Murry says

          In addition to saying he’s “feeling shy” it might also help to talk to him instead of about him. So after telling the adult he might be feeling shy, you could say to him “Kiddo, NewPerson would like to meet you when you feel ready” or “Ok, you can stay here on my lap for a minute, let me know if you want me to go over with you to meet the kids in the sandbox”

          Also for when he gets older, as an introvert raising an introvert – I role play things like “meeting new people on the first day of summer camp” with my oldest. It helps him a little bit, to have practiced a response to “what’s your name?” and “what do you like to do?” etc.

    • Another BigLaw Parent says

      It sounds like your concern is giving your son a label that becomes a self-fulfilling prophesy. You could replace “shy” with “biter” or “mean” or any other label and have the same concern. I think you can still respectfully explain things to the other adult without giving him a label as a *character* trait. So instead of saying “he’s shy” you could say “he’s not ready to talk/play/etc. yet” or “give him a few minutes to warm up. How was your weekend?” etc. We do this with our daughter. We suspect she’s introverted because she’s slow to warm, but once she’s in her element she’s happy, social, etc. (And we as her parents are both introverts, though I’m a much more social introvert than my husband.) At daycare drop off, Daughter’s BFF is super outgoing, loud, extroverted and comes running to us “HI!!” My daughter clings tightly to my shirt with her hands and legs and I just look down at BFF and say “BFF, Daughter isn’t ready yet. She’ll come play soon.” Sure enough, 5-10 minutes later the grip relaxes and off she goes running to play with BFF. We have been doing this since around 18 months and my daughter is now 2. I also make sure that I as a parent don’t spend lots of time/effort cajoling her into being social when she’s not ready. Every few minutes as we go about the drop off routine I say things like, “Can I set you down now? Are you ready? Mommy needs to put your lunch bag away – can you help me?” etc. But that’s also a know-your-kid thing. My kid WILL warm up in a few minutes. Some of her friends just have to be handed to the teacher, however, because they won’t stop being upset until their parents leave. With adults, I try to be more protective of her space because some adults want a hug or interaction right away. I just hold her as long as she needs and say “She’s not ready yet. Just wait a few minutes.” I also let them know what’s normal for Daughter to steer them towards requests that are comfortable for her. Daughter doesn’t like hugs, but she’ll give high fives — so if you get a hug you know you’re special, etc. Adults should be able to exercise patience ;) Hope that helps!

    • EB0220 says

      I totally relate to this! I’m introverted and pretty reserved, as is my older daughter. When my kids don’t want to greet someone, I do try to say that they’re *feeling* shy, although I’m probably not perfect about that. I agree with Closet that it’s probably better to say nothing. For what it’s worth, my reserved older daughter and my totally not reserved younger daughter both have moments where they hide and don’t want to greet people. No great answers, but I completely understand where you’re coming from.

    • Samantha says

      I think you can word it as “he’s feeling a little shy right now” just like “he’s feeling excited/being so responsible/being polite” etc. which labels it as something you DO not something you ARE.

      • Samantha says

        Annd…. it looks like everybody had the same thought! Great minds.

    • October says

      I also recommend checking out the book “Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can’t Stop Talking” by Susan Cain. I recently read it, and it helped shift my perception of “shy” being a bad quality – it may give you some ideas of how to approach the issue both for your child and yourself.

  7. another phrase says

    My mom used to say, “She has The Bashfuls” which I knew about because there was Bashful Smurf.
    The bashfuls would pass and I could be friendly and outgoing, too. Sometimes I’d have The Talkies.

    Label the feelings, or behaviors, not the kid, as you know.

  8. octagon says

    I’m going back to work in 3 weeks, at which point I will be 4 months PP. Nothing fits. I can make a few of my stretchy wrap dresses work, but I just feel miserable in all my clothes. And I’m right at the top of regular sizes (14-16) which sometimes fit, but the few things I tried on in womens sizes didn’t work at all. The scale hasn’t budged in a month, but I’m in the process of weaning so I hope that after that I can get back to an effective workout routine. I’m about 10 pounds over my pre-preg weight.

    Suggestions for a few key pieces to help me get through the next month or two without breaking the bank? I’m willing to spend maybe $250-300 total, but I need to focus on health and getting back to the clothes I already have.

    • Anon in NYC says

      Lands End sheath dresses were very helpful for me when returning to work (and still are, since I am still carrying extra weight). The material is a little thicker so I feel like they aren’t as body con while also still being stretchy.

      • Anonymous says

        My problem was that their sheath dresses were too tight in the bust when I was nursing. That and I won’t buy them anymore thanks to their Gloria Steinem cluster f…

        • Anon in NYC says

          I also think more slim cut pants and flowy tops. Have you considered Pleione tops? Check out Nordstrom Rack. They have a bunch on there (although the cap sleeve ones are not for everyone), and I like their tanks layered a cardigan or blazer.

        • Anon in NYC says

          Also, if you like ankle pants, I own the J Crew Matte Crepe Trousers (style # E1756) and looove them. They have an elastic waistband but are completely work appropriate.

    • Meg Murry says

      Would a new pair of Spanx or similar help, or would you be miserable in them? After my first son was born I found wearing Spanx under my work clothes made me feel a little more smoothed out and less lumpy-bumpy ick. However, after my second son was born the idea of wearing constricting Spanx made me want to cry, and I decided I’d rather have a tummy than be squeezed. So, YMMV, but consider trying on some gentle smoothing undergarments when trying out new clothes.

      Also, not to be Debbie Downer, but even if you get back to the same number on the scale, your shape may have changed (carrying more weight in the tummy, or have a rounder or flatter behind or wider hips, etc) and your old clothes may not fit as well as you liked. Or if they weren’t all that new before you got pregnant, you may manage to get them on and then decide they look out of date compared to current styles.

      What was your go-to work outfit pre-pregnancy? What brand did you try on in women’s sizes? Are you near a major department store where you could throw yourself on the mercy of a personal shopper (or even just a helpful salesperson?) In my area, there is a Macy’s that has a decent women’s department where I can at least get basics (or try on something to see the size and then see if it comes in different colors online), and I also hit Land’s End at Sears pretty regularly, since their regular sizes up to 18 and their plus sizes start at 16W.

      But *hugs*. I also a “oh crap, absolutely zero of my work clothes fit” moment a week or two before I went back to work. I shopped around until I found a pair of pants and shirt that I didn’t hate, then I bought the pants in 3 colors and the shirt in 5. It wasn’t ideal, but it got me through.

    • lsw says

      What about something like a wardrobe subscription program to hold you over for a few months?

    • Anonymous says

      I think that the flowy top with tailored bottom is the easiest post-partum outfit. It has taken a long time for my body to “settle” post partum and while I now have more of the pear shape I always had pre-kids, I was a definite apple for a few years immediately after having kids. I think some flowing shirts combined with slim-cut ankle pants or a knee-length black skirt is a really helpful way to get through that stage.

    • POSITA says

      I found that none of my pre-pregnancy stuff ever fit well again. My body was just a different shape. I also found that my old standby silhouettes just didn’t work. I had to come up with a whole new formula for dressing for work. It was a challenge and required a very un-fun shopping trip where I tried on TONS of ill fitting stuff before I found a few things that worked.

      I know many swear by loose tops and slim pants post-partum (I wear this as casual wear), but I found that I really liked dresses postpartum. They fit better for longer than pants, which made them more comfortable as my shape continued to change.

      Good luck. It sucks.

    • anon says

      Boden Ravello top – will handle the fluctuating bosom, camouflage the belly, and is drapey enough to look okay if you are able to loose the weight. (I own one in 2 different sizes, and they both look good on me. Not that I lost weight – sigh – I just ordered the wrong size). Tip: the prints hide wrinkles better, if you want to machine wash gentle and hang dry instead of dry cleaning.

    • Frozen Peach says

      This was so me, and now I’m fitting into stuff I couldn’t pre-pregnancy. I didn’t start really dropping weight until the end of weaning, so take heart– your hormones may work the same way.

      This may make you want to cry, but I actually saved a few smaller maternity items for after baby going back to work. I had a few maternity LBDs that fit me in the early second trimester but were laughable by the end, but after baby they fit my boobs and gave me lots of extra space to feel comfortable without screaming maternity. Maybe hit up a high-end maternity consignment store or two for a few things that you feel good in?

      Otherwise, A-lines were the only way I could get dressed, because my boobs and hips were so huge in comparison to the rest of me.

  10. halfway there says

    I am halfway through my 24-week maternity leave (biglaw) and I am starting to panic about going back to work. I really enjoyed my job pre-pregnancy and did not expect to feel this sense of dread so far in advance. I realize that a lot can change over the next 12 weeks, and maybe I will be ready to go back at that point, but it feels impossible right now. I just love being home with my daughter so much and I suddenly cannot imagine pulling the kind of hours I used to do fairly easily pre-baby. Is this normal or is it a sign I should be looking for a new job or considering staying at home? Any tips for dealing with this feeling of dread so that it doesn’t poison the next few months?

    • puffs? says

      I think universally the advice given to new moms (from other moms) at my firm has been to not make any changes for at least 6 months back at work. And, among the newer mom set, it’s apparently pretty common to be billing closer to 80% hours while working full-time. (though I am actually a little nervous that this implicit approval from the powers that be go out the window if we ever decide to match the Cravath scale.)

      I hated my biglaw job before baby, and still hate it now that I’m back and am actively looking for something new. I am leaning way out, knowing and accepting I won’t make my hours this year. But, I think even if I wanted to stay in this job, I would not try to put pressure on myself to bill crazy hours for the first year back. Of course, I work for fairly understanding partners who will likely not fire me at the end of the year. And strategy may change drastically if my group gets super slammed, which hasn’t happened yet.

    • Carrie M says

      I was nervous before I started back, and I think it’s totally normal to feel like you are. I agree with puffs re going back and giving it 6 months because it really does take a while to feel like you’re “with it” again, to get into a good routine at home and at work, etc. I had always billed above 2000 hrs pre baby. After I went back, I met my hours but not any “extra,” in part because I prioritized being home by 6pm on nearly every night. It meant doing work from home and on the weekends, and being okay with the nights I missed bedtime for filings or other deadlines where it just made more sense for me to be at the office. But for the most part, I’ve just become more efficient during the day so that I make as much of my in-office time billable as possible.

      So that’s all to say: it’s doable, but it takes time to feel like you’re not totally drowning (and there are still days when I feel that way). My two cents would be to stick with your original plan of going back and try to give it at least 6 months, unless you really, really feel confident that it’s not what’s best for you/your family. Good luck!!

    • Katala says

      I felt this way too. Starting maybe a bit sooner than 12 weeks. I ended up moving cities and firms at the end of leave but I really missed my old firm. Sometimes I think I should have gone back just to have that comparison. I’ve since moved again. And while I loved being home with a newborn, once he was older and I was back into work mode, I became much less interested in being a SAHM. He’s so much work! I like our relationship as it is for now, I really value our time together and do more fun stuff with him than day to day.
      Sorry for the novel, but know that those feelings may not last and situations change and you can always make a different decision if you really don’t like being back at work. Hugs!

      • RDC says

        Yes – I loved my maternity leave, but I think it would be totally different to be a SAHM indefinitely. My son is 18 months now and I am so relieved every Monday when we drop him at daycare. He is exhausting – physically, the kid never slows down – and the idea of coming up with organized, enriching activities seems totally unfun and overwhelming. So we outsource all that to daycare and just do fun stuff on the weekend. As a bonus, it’s also so. quiet. at work compared to the constant whirlwind of a toddler.

  11. Anon for this. says

    Listen to your gut. You can start quietly looking around to assess your options so that if you go back and hate it, you can already have next steps in place. Only you know your specific situation and whether it’s sustainable. But either way, it will be okay. I strongly encourage you to go back, even if only for a month or two, for the sake of all women who come after you, and to at least suss out the enormous investment you put in pre-baby. But it’s okay to say F it. I did, and now I’m in-house and happy as a panda with a bamboo tree.

  12. Paging Kat Tech Issue says

    Kat – autoplay Glidden paint ad above the comment section. Started after I had been on the page and reading for 2-3 minutes.

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