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71 Comments · by Kat

Everyone Thursday: Custom Stretch Trouser Leg Pants

Everyone· Machine-Washable Work Clothes· Maternity· Recent Recs

Burgundy Pants for Work: Loft Custom Stretch Trouser Leg PantsI always like a good burgundy pant for work — it’s dark enough not to show stains and dirt easily, and even though it’s a “fun” color it reads as muted and serious. In addition to neutrals, try it with light blues (chambray, even if you’re in a more casual office) and even brighter reds. Today’s 40%-off sale (no code needed) brings the $65 price down to $47; they’re available in regular, petite, and tall sizes. Loft Custom Stretch Trouser Leg Pants, Julie Fit The same pants in the Marisa fit are also marked down to $47. Also, here’s the maternity version (Julie fit) in regular and petite — they’re also 40% off, which brings the price down to $53. P.S. Tons of stuff on sale at Lands’ End right now! Their Great Winter Sale gives you up to 60% off men’s, women’s, and kids’ items, plus you can get 20% off regularly priced items and an additional 30% off sale and clearance with code DEAL and PIN 1261. Nice! (L-all)

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Sales of Note…

(See all of the latest workwear sales at Corporette!)

  • Ann Taylor – 30% off full-price tops and sweaters; up to 40% off all sale styles
  • Banana Republic Factory – 50% off everything; extra 15% off purchase
  • Eloquii – 50% off select styles; up to 40% off everything else
  • J.Crew – 40% off your purchase
  • J.Crew Factory – Up to 50% off everything; up to 50% off clearance; extra 15% off orders $100+; extra 20% off orders $125+
  • Lands’ End – 30% off full-price styles
  • Talbots – 30% off entire purchase
  • Zappos – 24,000+ sale items (for women)! Check out these reader-favorite workwear brands on sale, and some of our favorite kid shoe brands on sale.

Kid/Family Sales

  • J.Crew – 40% off your purchase
  • Lands’ End – 30% off full-price styles
  • Hanna Andersson – 100s of new markdowns; up to 30% off Easter
  • Carter’s – Swim 50% off; up to 50% off sandals; up to 50% off spring break deals
  • buybuyBaby – Major clearance markdowns

See some of our latest articles on CorporetteMoms:

  • Week in the Life of a Working Mom: In-House Counsel in Texas
  • How to Fit Date Nights In
  • How Do You Fit Exercise In as a Working Mom?
  • Do You Encourage Your Kids To Make Resolutions?
  • Almond Mom: How Do You Talk To Your Kids about Dieting?

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And — here are some of our latest threadjacks of interest – working mom questions asked by the commenters!

  • If you’re a working parent of an infant with low sleep needs, how do you function at work when you’re in the throes of baby’s sleep regression?
  • Should I cut my childcare down to 12 hours a month if I work from home?
  • Will my baby have speech delays if we raise her bilingual?
  • Has anyone given birth in a teaching hospital?
  • My child eats everything, and my friends’ kids do not – how should I handle? In general, what is the best way to handle when your child has some skill/ability and your friend’s child doesn’t have that skill/ability?
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  • I think I suffer from mom rage…
  • My husband and kids are gone this weekend – how should I enjoy my free time?
  • I’m struggling to be compassionate with a SAHM friend who complains she doesn’t have enough hours of childcare.
  • If you exclusively formula fed, what tips do you have for in the hospital and coming home?
  • Could I take my 4-yo and 8-yo on a 7-8 day trip to Paris, Lyon, and Madrid?
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Comments

  1. TBK says

    01/28/2016 at 10:23 am

    I’ve been posting recently about how my husband and I are worried that our 22 mo old son might be showing signs of …autism? something else?…I finally reached the pediatrician yesterday (the snow storm here in DC halted everything for several days) and he gave me several names of developmental pediatricians to try. He warned that it can take awhile to get an appointment. I called the dr at the hospital nearest us and the earliest appointment is in December! Almost a year away! I called another hospital and I can’t even talk to a real person until I receive, complete, and return a packet of paperwork. I called the hospital at UVA in Charlottesville (2 hrs away) and their earliest was in October. Our son won’t even be 3 by December, and he’s already getting speech therapy, but I cannot believe that in a major metropolitan area I need to wait almost a year for an appointment! He and his twin brother will have their 2 yo well visit in March so the regular ped can evaluate him again then, and he’ll also have his early intervention evaluation with the therapists through the county in May (where they check for neurological and social development) but I’m still just completely aghast at the fact that we might have to wait until fall just to get a diagnosis. Of course, we’re still not sure there’s anything going on, and he might just be his own quiet little person. Best case would be that we get a few months further on and it becomes clear there’s nothing to worry about and I go cancel his appointments, but if there is something, I just don’t know how to wait that long just to get started on figuring it all out. Is this normal in other parts of the country? Has anyone else had to wait that long for an appointment?

    • MDMom says

      01/28/2016 at 10:37 am

      That is crazy. I have no personal experience but live in same area. Have you tried the Baltimore area, Kennedy krieger etc?

    • Philanthropy Girl says

      01/28/2016 at 10:37 am

      In my small town/rural midwest community I waited for nearly 5 months to get in with a new family doctor for postpartum depression and hormone imbalance. It was nearly a 12 month wait to get in with the dentist I wanted to see. I haven’t had that issue with a general ped, but also haven’t gone looking for a specialist for my kiddo. I think there is a shortage of medical personnel around the country. The healthcare facility where I work has been facing a nursing shortage for months, and the other facilities in our region have the same issues.

      Is it a shorter wait time if your doctor schedules the appointment rather than you? I’d call the office back and see if the doctor will make a referral and get an appointment scheduled for you; you can always cancel if your 2 year well visit or early intervention eval go well. You could also call the offices and ask to be put on their cancellation list – they can call you if they have something come open earlier. That seems like a terribly long time to wait for something that should have early intervention.

    • Anonymous says

      01/28/2016 at 10:37 am

      A couple of things you can try- do any of these folks have a wait list for cancellations? It might be worth getting on it if you know you can swing an appointment on short notice. Also, can your doctor’s office make a call for you? Sometimes they get faster responses- although this may be the case where there aren’t enough specialists so everyone has a big wait.
      You can also try asking on the local parent boards for strategy/experience, but I’m guessing you will probably hear that there isn’t much to do about it.

      • TBK says

        01/28/2016 at 10:43 am

        The ped offered to call on our behalf if after the 2 yr well visit he thought there was an issue, but he said there’s often nothing he can do to speed these things up. MDMom, Krieger’s on my list to try today but I have very little hope that Johns Hopkins will be easier to get into than INOVA Fairfax. The hospital with the whole “we’ll mail you a packet first” protocol is DC Children’s. Not sure if there’s anything at GW or VHC, but I’m guessing the ped would have sent me to those before Krieger if there was anyone there. Some googling turned up other parents who are similarly amazed at the wait time (there are threads on DC Urban Moms about it). It looks like you could make a fortune if you were a specialist and wanted to move to this area!

        • AIMS says

          01/28/2016 at 10:52 am

          Do you know anyone who may know someone who works in one of these places? I know people who got to see specialists sooner that way. Might be worth asking around.

        • MDMom says

          01/28/2016 at 11:51 am

          Baltimore also has the University of Maryland Medical Center, maybe they have something? Suburban Hospital in Bethesda is part of JHU, so maybe they see some patients there (no idea, just speculating).

      • WAitlist says

        01/28/2016 at 11:30 am

        I’m also in the NoVa area and I had luck getting into a well-known and similarly overbooked pediatric allergist off the waitlist. I “babysat” the waitlist though, and typically called Mondays and Wednesdays mid-morning to check in with the receptionist on duty to see whether anyone had canceled. I was polite and courteous when I spoke with them – did not belabor the issue, just asked about cancellations, and eventually either a receptionist took pity on me, or I just timed it right, and got into a cancelled spot.

        • TBK says

          01/28/2016 at 11:32 am

          I’ll try this — thank you! I’m willing to travel to wherever if necessary, but it would obviously be better to get in at the hospital nearest us.

    • NewMomAnon says

      01/28/2016 at 10:48 am

      Oh, that is so hard. I’m sorry. Do you know whether the ped evaluation will give you access to early intervention programs that are specific to ASD? The diagnosis isn’t as important as the support and services, ultimately.

      I am sure DC has some parents groups who might be able to help you navigate (but watch out for Autism Speaks, they are more of a controversial lobbying group and not really a support network). Also; it surprises me not at all that DC has a shortage of these types of services. I don’t know whether you would be willing to take a trip with your son, but my experience has been that the Midwest has a higher doctor/patient ratio than the East Coast. I’ve also heard Boston has some amazing autism resources. Have you looked at Baltimore?

      • TBK says

        01/28/2016 at 10:57 am

        The regular ped assured me that at this age what’s most important is the speech therapy and he’s already getting that. The next step he said was therapy that would help him learn how to develop socially appropriate responses but that that’s really for older kids — he’s too young to understand any of it now. My husband and I keep repeating to each other that we’re doing everything we can, that we’ve taken all the right steps, but it’s just terrible not to know.

    • Anon says

      01/28/2016 at 11:40 am

      In my state this organization has a great reputation. They are only local, however, they may have access to similar networks in you area:

      http://www.fraser.org/

    • Meg Murry says

      01/28/2016 at 11:48 am

      I don’t have time to troll through all the resources there, but I know the blogger Amalah (amalah dot com) has a son who is 10-ish now who was first diagnosed with speech delays, then sensory processing disorder and ADHD, and now that the umbrella for the diagnosis was widened is considered on the ASD spectrum.

      She is in the DC area (or was, she moved closer to Baltimore this year) and I feel like she posted a list of places that were helpful in getting Noah’s early diagnosis and the preschool he attended that was great for him (after trying one that was a terrible fit), so maybe searching back through her posts there. There was the Something Something Center where I think Noah had therapy and camp? Sorry I can’t be more specific, it didn’t stick since I’m not in DC.

      I’m sorry you are going through this, and unfortunately I think you really aren’t going to get a clear cut “yes, this is the diagnosis” – it will probably be a lot more of “it could be A, but we’ll need to wait until he’s older to see that”. We are in that loop with my youngest’s hearing – my oldest has major hearing loss, and it is totally clear to me that the youngest has some kind of loss, but it’s not severe enough to be total loss, and until he’s old enough to cooperate for a more thorough “press this button when you hear the beep” evaluation it is impossible to tell just how severe it is.

      Can you go back to whoever you originally got in touch with for EI and see if they can set you on the path to further evaluations, or any kind of further therapy/interventions?

    • anon a mouse says

      01/28/2016 at 12:46 pm

      Does your insurance have a patient advocate benefit? You might contact them and see if they can identify any places that might be able to get you in earlier for a screening or initial consult.

    • FVNC says

      01/28/2016 at 12:56 pm

      I haven’t read all the replies yet, but yes, I think that is crazy. When we went through the eval process, we waited approximately 2 months to see a dev ped, and then were extremely fortunate to get an expedited appt at Kennedy Krieger for a second opinion (after a really bad experience with the local doctor). We got the KKI appt through a family friend who is a doctor at Hopkins (although we were told the standard wait is only (!!) 4 months, so 12 months sounds crazy). Now is the time to leverage any connections to hospitals/providers. What about your state’s infant-toddler program? Can they help expedite it? Also, remember: the fact that your son is receiving services (even without any sort of diagnosis) is so great; it’s likely that at his age, you are doing everything you can for him.

    • Betty says

      01/28/2016 at 1:15 pm

      I’m so sorry!! I know this is crazy frustrating. My sister, who also lives in the DC area, came up against this exact same thing. We were all incredulous that she had to wait so long to have my nephew seen. I believe she ended up leveraging a connection or two, but it was still a long wait. Again, so sorry that you have to wait to get the process started to see if there are answers.

    • Anonymous says

      01/28/2016 at 1:34 pm

      Virginia Institute of Autism in Cville would be very helpful. In general, doctors are very hesitant to diagnose – you’d be better off to get services than wait for a 100% medical opinion. Sounds like you are already doing a lot right now.

    • CrimLaw Mom says

      01/29/2016 at 11:21 am

      I’m originally from Falls Church and live in the Tidewater area now. It may be worth checking out CHKD in Norfolk as well: http://www.chkd.org/Our-Doctors/Medical-Specialists/Developmental-Pediatrics/

      We have had wonderful experiences with their ER and surgery group, though not development pediatrics.

      It looks like the wait time for an appt varies but averages 6 weeks! It looks like they also do urgent consultations: http://www.chkd.org/uploadedFiles/Documents/Medical_Professionals/Referral%20Info_Developmental%20Pediatrics.pdf

      That could definitely be worth the drive. From Falls Church it takes about 3 hours with minimal traffic, and check traffic around Richmond and the bridge tunnels.

    • CrimLaw Mom says

      01/29/2016 at 11:23 am

      Not sure if this went through due to links, but you should definitely check with CHKD Developmental Pediatrics in Norfolk. From their website, it looks like a 6 week wait time for appointments. Worth the drive! Around 3 hours if timed to avoid traffic.

  2. MomAnon4This says

    01/28/2016 at 11:00 am

    Are there public agencies or nonprofits that value early intervention that can help?
    Here in Atlanta there’s the Marcus Institute, and I know there’s a group that focuses on ages 0-3 and identifying autism. I’m sorry I can’t help more, only commiserate.

    • MomAnon4This says

      01/28/2016 at 11:14 am

      This group: zero to three (all one word) dot org
      Also join your local Facebook group for parents of autism. Ask your county (esp. if you’re in Montgomery County MD) ask your insurance, church, synagogue, daycare provider. Someone will know someone who can help.

    • Lurker says

      01/28/2016 at 11:52 am

      Are you near any community health centers? They might not have that particular name but basically you want to find your local FQHC (federally qualified health care center). These are typically the places that people with no insurance go. However, little known fact, they take EVERYONE and you are not taking a slot away from someone that needs it by going there. They need patients with insurance to keep up their revenue so they can stay in business to help the uninsured. I’m on the board of one. We have amazing early intervention services because sadly, the lower income population tends to need it the most for babies that did not proper pre-natal nutrition or were exposed to drugs and alcohol. They might be able to help you out.

      • Lurker says

        01/28/2016 at 11:52 am

        One note though. Not all FQHCs have the early intervention. My FQHC merged with a children’s facility which is how we acquired the early intervention program which is actually run by the state.

  3. Anxiety says

    01/28/2016 at 11:22 am

    Has anyone gone on a short dose of Ativan or anything else to get through a rough patch? I’ve been struggling with anxiety, and my husband just left for a three week work trip overseas. Between winter weather and knowing I have a significant stretch of solo parenting in front of me, I put a call into my doctor to see if there is something that can take the edge off. I don’t want to take something for a long time – I just need a little help to lengthen my fuse for a month. I’m in a bad cycle of losing my patience with the kids, then feeling anxious/terrible that I yelled, repeat, repeat, repeat.

    Is that what Ativan is designed to do, or am I looking at taking something for an extended period? I’ve never gone on medication before for something like this, and I”m afraid (anxious!) about the horror stories I’ve heard coming off.

    • anonforthis says

      01/28/2016 at 11:49 am

      I’ve been prescribed ativan for panic attacks resulting from PTSD. For me, it makes me feel slightly drunk: groggy and detached. I didn’t drive and I didn’t go to work when taking it. Personally, I wouldn’t have felt comfortable watching young children on it (reaction time dulled, somewhat listless). Obviously, everyone reacts differently and maybe at really low doses that’s not what it feels like.

      I don’t want to minimize what you’re going through but I’m not sure ativan is the answer, unless you’re also having other anxiety symptoms (unable to sleep, hyperaware, unable to focus, racing heart, crying jags, etc).

      Definitely see a doctor, though! I don’t think they’ll prescribe something you don’t need.

      • NewMomAnon says

        01/28/2016 at 12:21 pm

        As a single mom, I can say that routines, realistic expectations, and relief providers (sitters, family members, friends) are the best ways to combat the parenting anxiety. My kiddo is 2, and I would sit down with her and have a talk about the plan for each day and each weekend (which I would have prepared in advance) and my expectations for her behavior. I would be honest and say that I’m anxious about going it alone, and that I may lose my temper and I am sorry about that, but I still love her so much and if I lose my temper, it’s because I’m scared and not because she is bad. I have no idea if she understands any of that, but it helps me to get it out in the open in a calm environment.

        I would also set up a relief care provider on a regular basis, and simplify as much as possible. Hot dogs, take out, spaghetti, grilled cheese, frozen meatballs are all just fine. Now is the time to cut back on work responsibilities, if possible; tell your boss and co-workers that you may be in later than usual and plan to leave a few minutes earlier than usual.

        It’ll be ok. You may not live up to your image of ideal parenting, but it will be a blip in your kids’ lives.

    • Anonymous4 says

      01/28/2016 at 12:03 pm

      I didn’t do Ativan, I did Lexapro for depression/anxiety a number of years ago. My treatment plan was to be short term, and short term on Lexapro turned out to be about a year. By the time they got me on it and got my dosage sorted out (took forever, battling nausea and sleeplessness in particular) it was about 4 months, then on it long enough to get things running smoothly again, and then it was two or three months to come off (basically a slow weaning so you don’t crash and burn).

      I wasn’t happy on Lexapro – I didn’t feel like myself, and was so glad to be off of it. I’m facing some PPD issues along with some complicated grief issues and I’m looking for some other solutions, including counseling and vitamin D supplements.

    • NewMomAnon says

      01/28/2016 at 12:06 pm

      I think Ativan is the brand name for Lorezapam, right? My ex used Lorezapam during a few wicked stretches of anxiety as a “rescue med.” Meaning, he didn’t take it on a regular schedule, just when things got overwhelming. As an outsider watching someone function on Ativan, these are my observations (and note that I have no idea whether the effects were caused by the medication or by the debilitating anxiety he was facing when he took the medication):

      Within a half hour after taking the meds, he would “zone out” and become uncommunicative. I interpreted this as him being angry with me the first few times; it was scary and confusing. He was advised not to drink while taking the meds, and often needed to immediately go to bed because he was so zonked out. He often felt like he couldn’t drive after taking Ativan.

      Again, he took these meds when he was really, really struggling already, so what I saw may have been the side effects of awful anxiety and not Ativan. He may have also been on a very high dose. I would discuss with your doctor and try them the first time when you have another adult present or when the kids are not around. I don’t think he struggled to come off of the meds, because he wasn’t on them consistently.

      Also, get yourself a regular babysitter for the next three weeks! Pick some regular times so you have a night (or three) off each week to go hang out with friends or go to yoga or just sit and read a book at the library. Maybe have the sitter come a few mornings a week to help you get the kids out the door. Three weeks of solo parenting is hard.

      • Meg Murry says

        01/28/2016 at 12:15 pm

        +1 to looking into extra adults over medication (or in addition to medication)

        I haven’t used the drug you mention, but in my experience I’ve never hit on the right drug to help me with any kind of mental or emotional issue on the first try.

        I think that medication is definitely worth pursuing, but in the short term I would recommend calling in the cavalry even more so. Can you call in babysitters/friends/family? Fly in Grandma for a long weekend? Or ship the kids off for a sleepover at Grandmas for a weekend day? Take a vacation day or two in that 3 week stretch to just be at home by yourself and maybe do some laundry or grocery shopping but mostly just decompress?

    • Anon says

      01/28/2016 at 12:08 pm

      I can’t comment on taking something for a short period, but I took Lexapro (10 mg a day) for 9 months (my doctor prescribed it with the intent of taking me off after 9 months, as she said a lot of people’s brains “reset” in that time period). I went off after 9 months, primarily because we were TTC. I weaned off over the course of 6 weeks and, with the exception of the week I actually went cold turkey during which I had a couple days where I was super anxious and emotional, I had pretty much no side effects (I did experience brain “zaps,” during the 6 weeks, which were weird, but not painful). I have been off it for a year and I am now pregnant and my anxiety is 80-90% better, depending on the day (side note, I take a vitamin D supplement and 500 mg a day of DHA and feel both have also helped my mood).

      I also had a very short fuse, and would unfairly lash out at my husband and my mother (I was kind of a horrible person to be around, which was why I agreed to try Lexapro). I am SO MUCH better now, and I am very glad that I got it under control before I had a child, as I cannot imagine the type of parent I would have been before. My mother (who is almost 60) had similar personality traits (lashing out) that we dealt with growing up, and recently went on Lexapro and has also been a lot better. Obviously it isn’t for everyone, but don’t rule out trying something longer term.

    • Anxiety says

      01/28/2016 at 12:29 pm

      Thanks so much for all your helpful responses. Sounds like Ativan is not what I’m looking for! I just spoke to my doctor, and she advised starting Lexapro. She said it’s common, etc. etc. I somehow feel more overwhelmed knowing that the prescription was called in – it feels ridiculous that I can’t handle this for a few weeks, and yet I just feel overwhelmed and sad.

      • MDMom says

        01/28/2016 at 12:45 pm

        I think you should be proud of yourself for recognizing you need help. It can be really really hard to admit you need help, especially in the form of psychotropics. Takes a lot of self-awareness. I hope the Lexapro helps. Just get through one day at a time.

        • Meg Murry says

          01/28/2016 at 1:40 pm

          +1 Good for you for getting help, and I hope you can continue to find something that works for you beyond these trying 3 weeks.

          And don’t beat yourself up over it, solo parenting is hard for anyone who isn’t used to it (and hard for those that are but at least they’ve developed routines and coping mechanisms).

          If your children are past the point of constantly trying to kill themselves (i.e. older than 1 or 2) the phrase “Mommy is frustrated and needs a time out” is also useful and something kids “get”

      • Anon says

        01/28/2016 at 1:35 pm

        I’m the Anon at 12:08, and I may have something for you to look forward to – my first day on Lexapro felt like the greatest day of my life. I was SO FREAKING HAPPY and focused, and felt a little high (but a good high). It tapered off over the next couple days, but my mom said it lasted for her for almost a week. So maybe you will have that to look forward to :)

      • Anon for this says

        01/28/2016 at 5:45 pm

        Alternative opinion: for me, Ativan is a life-saver. I have had a few bouts of bad anxiety, and Ativan is super effective as a “rescue med.” It totally stopped the anxiety in its tracks. It only lasts for a few hours, so it’s for actual anxiety attacks. When I get anxiety attacks I literally feel like my skin is crawling and my head sort of buzzes and flips into overdrive. I also start worrying about everything and every problem has big, overwhelming consequences. The Ativan just stops that – calms me down, relaxes me, slows everything. If you have anxiety like that, Ativan may be helpful. Other options: Prozac, Zoloft, Lexapro for long term. Hydroxyzine (sort of same effect as Ativan, but much milder) as a short-term option. Talk to your doc.

  4. Pogo says

    01/28/2016 at 11:39 am

    PSA to whoever was looking into video baby monitors you can access via the cloud –

    I can’t remember if anyone brought up iSmartAlarm, but someone suggested it to me (for alarm purposes) and it seems like it would be useful as a nannycam type video monitor, and I don’t *think* it has a monthly fee?

    • NYCpg says

      01/28/2016 at 1:42 pm

      Thank you!! That was me – I’ll look into it.

  5. NYC says

    01/28/2016 at 12:17 pm

    Has anyone used a co-sleeper for a newborn? DH and I are expecting our first in April and are thinking of getting one of the arm’s reach co-sleepers (attaches to parents’ bed, but is not baby actually sleeping in parents’ bed). Any thoughts on these? TIA!

    • kc esq says

      01/28/2016 at 12:30 pm

      I used the arm’s reach co-sleeper in its detached configuration — so it was basically just a pack n play, but I can speak to its quality. It held up very well.

      • Byrd says

        01/28/2016 at 12:34 pm

        I used a pack and play bassinet right next to the bed, and the configuration was great (loved being able to touch baby while in bed) but quality poor (mattress didn’t hold up). If we have a second child I’ll either get the co sleeper or just put the crib in our bedroom next to the bed, which is what we are doing now (at 3 months)

    • MDMom says

      01/28/2016 at 12:50 pm

      We used the arms reach cosleeper and it was fantastic for the first 2 months or so when I was breastfeeding every 2-3 hr even at night. I actually bought it when I was tired of getting in and out of bed because the other bassinet I had was too short. Seems crazy to spend $100 for 2 months use but it was awesome and I’d do it again. We stopped using it when baby started getting more mobile and I’d wake up to him sleeping perpendicular in the cosleeper with his legs up on the side rail. Went to rock n play for a few months, then crib in own room.

    • layered bob says

      01/28/2016 at 1:36 pm

      We use the arms reach cosleeper and really, really like it. My daughter went through a phase when she was a few weeks old where she only wanted to sleep ON me (and I thought, oh great I spent all this money on a useless, ugly thing), but otherwise she’s slept great there. We got the organic mattress because I didn’t like the feel of the standard mattress. She’s really too big for it now, and she would probably happily sleep somewhere else at this point, but we keep using it because I like having her right next to me (but not touching me.)

    • CapHillAnon says

      01/28/2016 at 1:37 pm

      Yes, we borrowed one and used it for our second child. Loved it. I’m expecting my third in June, and am planning to buy one.

    • Anon says

      01/28/2016 at 1:38 pm

      We got this one, but we have a king sized bed so fitting it in the bed wasn’t an issue.

      http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B00UQGW7CM/ref=pd_lpo_sbs_dp_ss_1?pf_rd_p=1944687582&pf_rd_s=lpo-top-stripe-1&pf_rd_t=201&pf_rd_i=B005ASKQ42&pf_rd_m=ATVPDKIKX0DER&pf_rd_r=0K9MMJV46JZY71VA4N8Z

    • Lkl says

      01/28/2016 at 2:27 pm

      We borrowed one from a friend, assuming we’d use it a lot, but in fact did not. (A), at the beginning it was really hard to nurse in bed – a chair was much easier; (B) I always had to get up to pee and to change the baby’s diaper at every feeding anyway, so there wasn’t really a benefit to staying in bed, (C) baby was both a very noisy sleeper and a very light sleeper, so we all woke each other up all the time. I assumed we would be in the same room for six months but in fact it was just a very short time. Based on all that, I’d say borrow one until you know which baby you get and whether it’s going to work for you.

    • SC says

      01/28/2016 at 2:59 pm

      We also used the arms reach co-sleeper in its detached configuration. Our baby didn’t sleep in it very long – he preferred the rock n’ play for his first 2 months, and then we moved him to his crib in his room around 4 months. But we’ve taken the co-sleeper on short vacations and to in-laws’ and friends’ houses when we’ll be staying past his bedtime, and he’s slept just fine. Once you get the hang of it, it’s pretty easy to set up and take down, and the quality has been very good. My son is 9 mo. now, and we probably need to find a regular pack n play because he’s starting to pull up on the side of the crib now.

    • Anon says

      01/28/2016 at 8:14 pm

      I bought the Arm’s Reach Mini used off of Craigslist for about $70. (Just set up a Craigslist alert, it took a couple months , but it was easy to come by in NYC.) We used it until our daughter started sleeping through the night at 10 weeks, then moved her to her own room. She’s a pretty noisy sleeper, so once she didn’t need to eat in the middle of the night we were glad to give her some space.

      As for nursing / changing her in bed: I have a contoured tempurpedic pillow that I just turned upright and leaned against while nursing. To change her we had several cloth changing pads, diapers and wipes in the cosleeper pockets. I just sat crosslegged in bed and changed her on the bed (after I could sit crosslegged!) Then I was only getting out of bed once a night to pee / refill my water bottle instead of two or three times.

      But make sure you buy an extra sheet or two!

  6. Betty says

    01/28/2016 at 1:19 pm

    Anyone dealt with an underweight child? My son has always been at the bottom of the growth curve. He was a peanut when born and continues to be a peanut at 5, but he has begun to falter from his curve (which is below 5%). We tend to be low intervention-type parents (as is our pediatrician) but we are starting to do some other testing. We are already gluten-free as my husband has Celiac’s and we suspect that our son does as well.

    Oh and for extra fun: We are firing our nanny tonight. Caught her asleep on the job. So no time like the present to add medical tests to finding a new caregiver. But we have found an au pair to start this summer! Woo hoo! One positive.

    • hoola hoopa says

      01/28/2016 at 3:28 pm

      My kids have been low weight and so long as they are still moving up on their own curve (aka, not loosing weight without an illness to explain it) and developing normally, I haven’t worried about it. One particularly slow growing child did have cluster of blood tests at one point for various issues (ie, growth hormone, thyroid) and was a-ok. My husband and I were always small, too, so it’s not a big shocker.

      Celiac’s runs in our family as well, and with a parent with it, I think it is wise to test. Assuming that’s normal, I would wait it out. As one friend (who has giant kids well OVER the growth curve) pointed out, SOMEONE has to be on the tail! :)

      Such a bummer about the nanny!

    • Anonymous says

      01/28/2016 at 3:32 pm

      Not exactly the same situation but my son has always been lower on the growth curve (sub 9th). We focus on nutritious high caloric foods – this way he doesn’t have to eat more but gets more calories. Guacamole as dip for his chicken fingers; making muffins with pea protein powder, avocado slices in his sandwiches with full fat mayo instead of tomato and mustard; cheese and high fat yoghurt (you can get a brand called Liberte that has a 10% fat version). If you google high caloric nutritious food you should get some more ideas. We’ve also allowed protein shakes on occassion as getting him to eat enough protein has been a challenge.

  7. dc mom anon says

    01/28/2016 at 1:25 pm

    Is anyone afraid of the zika breakout? TTC this spring and while there have not been any cases in the US, it feels like its just a matter of time. DC is full of mosquitoes.

    • ECR says

      01/28/2016 at 1:37 pm

      Following this. I am TTC for #2, and we’ve planned a trip to Florida in two months. The yellow fever mosquito, which spreads Zika, is common in Florida. Any thoughts? It totally scares the heck out of me, particularly since they don’t even have an accurate way to diagnose this yet.

      • Lurker says

        01/28/2016 at 1:47 pm

        TTC #1. Going to Florida late March for a wedding I am in. My husband isn’t freaked out at all. I don’t think our plans involve things that will have us around mosquitoes much. However, the whole thing is very scary and I think it will eventually get to the U.S. too. I don’t know how it wouldn’t. Maybe it will be a justification for a massive mosquito kill though by the govt. They haven’t done one of those in decades where I live because it hurt some birds too.

    • FVNC says

      01/28/2016 at 1:40 pm

      Considering TTC #2 and am also in an area where the carrier mosquitoes live. It makes me a bit nervous, but my normally very level-headed husband is really freaked out by it. Not sure how I’ll handle it if I do become pregnant this summer — I love to be outside, and it’s not really realistic to stay cooped up all the time with a high-energy toddler…wear bug spray all the time? I guess? I think my husband would prefer to wait to TTC till late summer/early fall so that 1st and 2nd trimesters are during winter but I don’t like that idea, either…

    • Anon for this says

      01/28/2016 at 2:00 pm

      I’ll admit, I’m not normally a freaker-out-er, but I am a bit concerned about it, esp. given how quickly the recommendations and warnings are changing. Also considering #2, and it’s making me re-think the timing a bit. I’d like a little more clarity as to what’s going on, the risk, and ideally more steps towards containment and/or a cure. I understand that not everyone has the benefit of time or timing, but since I do (at least I assume), I think I’m taking advantage at least for now.

    • anonymama says

      01/28/2016 at 2:44 pm

      Currently pregnant and terrified. Already an older mom, with an older husband, pregnancy was a surprise so I wasn’t taking prenatals…so I was already on edge about potential issues. Every time I turn on the radio there is more information about it. Doesn’t help that I work in public health and get actual scientific updates. The information is changing rapidly and hearing about potential new transmission modes and how quickly it is spreading is really scaring the heck out of me. The next 6 months are going to be tough. Definitely would put off TTC if I were in a high-risk zone.

      • ELL says

        01/28/2016 at 3:36 pm

        What are the potential new transmission modes? I looked at the cdc website and thought it was just transmitted through mosquito bites.

        • anonymama says

          01/29/2016 at 12:08 am

          known/suspected transmission modes:
          – mosquito bites
          – mother to fetus
          – at least one report of se**al transmission (husband infected by bite, returned home, infected wife through s* x)

          Other modes – e.g., person to person contact, air – not known but given how quickly this is happening it is possible. And it’s not yet mosquito season outside of the tropics so as the weather warms up the mosquitoes may make it farther north.

  8. Also in DC says

    01/28/2016 at 2:13 pm

    My husband and I had a conversation about Zika conversation last night. You are not alone on being freaked out…and I am normally a rational and level-headed person. We recently started TTC (after delaying for a year due to some lingering health issues) and I’m heading to Florida for work in a few weeks. Seriously universe? That being said, I’m going with bug spray, longer clothing, and mostly AC/Indoor time. You can only prepare so much.

  9. Meg Murry says

    01/28/2016 at 2:40 pm

    Given the situation in Flint with the water supply, has anyone had the water in their home tested? We have always lived in older houses, so my pediatrician had our kids lead levels checked when they were pretty young (1 or 2) and they came back ok, but we’re in a new-to-us but very old house with ancient plumbing in a city with very old pipes plus I’m sure there is lead paint on at least some of the plaster walls and I’m a little nervous.

    I don’t really want one of the home test kits because they just don’t seem that accurate, but I don’t want to have my water tested by someone trying to sell me a water filtration system. Anyone ever sent out water from your house to be tested and do you have a recommendation? I know I can contact my city utility and they might be able to do it, but I’d really like to do it myself to make sure I get the results back directly, not filtered through a city employee (and I’d also like to sample my kid’s school and daycare if the directors are willing to cooperate).

    Any suggestions or resources?

    • layered bob says

      01/28/2016 at 2:49 pm

      +1. I really want to get our house + water tested but I have no idea how to go about doing it.

    • NewMomAnon says

      01/28/2016 at 2:52 pm

      Can you ask your home insurance carrier for recommendations? They might also cover some or all of the costs of treatment, if you do test.

      For the lead paint – Young House Love swore by a certain brand of lead paint testers, which is the only one endorsed by the EPA. You might google to see if you can find the brand name in their archives.

    • CHJ says

      01/28/2016 at 2:52 pm

      We did this as part of our inspection when we bought our house. We used a private lab that specializes in residential water testing. If you’re in the Boston area, the lab we used is called ETR Laboratories. If you search for well-water testing, those labs should be able to test your tap water.

    • mascot says

      01/28/2016 at 2:53 pm

      I’m guessing that this is a very big industry topic right now. I’d see if your pediatrician has any local resources. https://www.healthychildren.org/English/safety-prevention/all-around/Pages/Lead-Screening-for-Children.aspx

    • lsw says

      01/28/2016 at 3:27 pm

      Unless you have a well, can your water provider do it? I know ours does (small city).

    • hoola hoopa says

      01/28/2016 at 3:35 pm

      Our city (not in MI) offered free tests about a year ago and are offering them now (I assume due to heightened interest with the Flint disaster). Worth asking your water provider.

      The ‘good’ news about really old pipes is that the lead has maybe already run off and you’re left with high iron. That’s what we’ve got. And my husband, who knows more about this than I do, says that homes built around 1970 are actually risker than much older homes because of the lead solder use… or something… not my area.

      FYI, if you go down this path. We replumbed our previous house, and it wasn’t too bad. We did a lot of work on that house and replumbing was actually one of the highest quality of life returns on investment, and pretty painless in time and money relatively.

      We are now looking into testing our soil for lead, since it was formerly an apple orchard for many decades. Woohoo.

  10. Anonymous says

    01/28/2016 at 6:10 pm

    A friend’s kid is 4 years old and interested in mail. Can anyone suggest what to send him? Was looking for something i could easily buy on amazon. Like sticker packs or temporary tatoos or a book suggestion. Basically a fun gift for a kid who just got a younger sister and is feeling a bit underappreciated. Think of it as like the coolest pack of stuff for under $20 bucks you could send a little kid.

    • Anonymous says

      01/28/2016 at 7:03 pm

      Sticker packs sound perfect. The “getting mail” is going to be the most exciting thing… What the mail is is totally incidental.

    • Meg Murry says

      01/28/2016 at 7:21 pm

      Or some postcards. Just buy a few postcards from your city and drop one in the mail every few weeks.

      It’s the idea of mail that’s more exciting than the actual item in the mail, so no need to spend much money.

    • Anon says

      01/28/2016 at 10:03 pm

      I think post cards are probably perfect.

      But if you wanted something that was a little more, set it and forget it, try a magazine subscription! National Geographic for Little Kids, ZooBooks, Highlights High Five, Ladybug. There’s even a Thomas and Friends magazine, Disney Jr. and Disney Princess if he’s allowed branded stuff.

      You can also sign him up for a subscription box. (Maybe have mom register for it and then pay for a month or two, then maybe mom could get grandma or aunts and uncles involved.) Kiwicrate is about 20/month and so is Kidstir. There are a bunch of them now.

    • anonymama says

      01/29/2016 at 12:15 am

      Have 4 year old. Loves getting:
      – Highlights High 5 magazine every month
      – Postcards with animals or something cool
      – Letters with confetti (though parents might not love)

      Also – we got a really cool book of Where’s Waldo postcards from Amazon – each one has a Where’s Waldo page – you could send one a week and I bet he would just love that.

      Depends on the family but we get so many amazon deliveries for the household that the boxes no longer hold as much interest as they once did…my kids figure it’s just more soap or whatever, but they LOVE random, non-corporate-looking packages and envelopes that are hand addressed. So if you have a bit of time to gather some stuff (random office supplies would be great- post-it notes, post-it flags, colored paper clips) and put them in your own package that would be an awesome surprise.

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