Maternity Monday: ‘Kate’ Cowl Neck Ruched Body-Con Dress
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Sales of note for 2/7:
(See all of the latest workwear sales at Corporette!)
- Nordstrom – Winter Sale, up to 60% off! 7850 new markdowns for women
- Ann Taylor – Extra 25% off your $175+ purchase — and $30 of full-price pants and denim
- Banana Republic Factory – Up to 50% off everything + extra 15% off
- Boden – 15% off new season styles
- Eloquii – 60% off 100s of styles
- J.Crew – Extra 50% off all sale styles
- J.Crew Factory – 40% off everything including new arrivals + extra 20% off $125+
- Rothy’s – Final Few: Up to 40% off last-chance styles
- Spanx – Lots of workwear on sale, some up to 70% off
- Talbots – 40% off one item + free shipping on $150+
And — here are some of our latest threadjacks of interest – working mom questions asked by the commenters!
- The concept of “backup care” is so stupid…
- I need tips on managing employees in BigLaw who have to leave for daycare pickup…
- I’m thinking of leaning out to spend more time with my family – how can I find the perfect job for that?
- I’m now a SAHM and my husband needs to step up…
- How can I change my thinking to better recognize some of my husband’s contributions as important, like organizing the shed?
- What are your tips to having a good weekend with kids, especially with little kids? Do you have a set routine or plan?
OP here. Thank you all so much. Seriously, your words and stories and thoughts are balm to my soul.
Hearing that I’m not the only one whose husband doesn’t speak gift helps tremendously. I forgot to mention that I worked in a specialty high-end gift store for five years, so I literally spent my days helping hapless husbands plan elaborate gifts for their wives. My husband is amazing, and does lots of things for me. In fact, he is king of the spontaneous nice gift– usually on a random tuesday. Which is part of why this is so baffling to me– like, SAVE that for a week and give it to me ON THE DAY… He’s a fantastic partner and dad, and is very giving to me overall.
I have sent him links to things before, and he has always bought it and wrapped it, and it has made both of us extremely happy. There is this horrible, Hallmark part of me that says I shouldn’t have to do that and he doesn’t really love me if I do. So I’m raising my afternoon coffee cup to the peanut butter and dog leashes and mosquito lanterns. Because hearing that there are other women who have happy relationships with great guys who just cannot figure out what seems to be a basic life skill makes me feel like the world will be okay again.
TBK, I love the idea of several things to choose from so it’s still a surprise. And yep, I’ve gotten the “your present’s over there, in that box…”
His love language is definitely acts of service. And I can never understand why he gets so emotional about the dishwasher, but I’m always happy to unload it when he asks. So yup, this is so so much easier to understand now, especially because I’ll know I’m not the only one going “buy me this. here’s some wrapping paper. yes i could buy it myself but i need you to give it to me in the paper.” And covering for him by saying, oh, my husband got me this awesome thing!
And Meg, +1 million on this: “I don’t care about gifts. I don’t care about cards (and in fact, hate pre-printed cheesy Hallmark cards that his mother and grandmother love). But it is his job to teach my sons that on Mother’s Day is the day that you take time to do something nice for your mother (and grandmothers).”
Thanks to all who commented on my post about breast ultrasound when nursing about 2 weeks ago.
Everything was OK, the lump I had felt turned out to be a galactocele (a sort of milk blister/clogged duct inside the tissue, clearly visible on the ultrasound). So relieved!
The doctor said that I did a really good job of detecting something abnormal during a time when there is a lot of change in the tissue anyways because of nursing, and said I shouldn’t hesitate to get checked again if I’m in doubt.
So ladies, remember to do breast self exams regularly, even when breastfeeding – it’s the only way to tell “this lump is always there” vs. “that’s something new”.
So I am blue today, because yesterday was my first Mothers’ Day, and my husband didn’t do anything, not even wish me a Happy Mothers’ Day. Technically he did, as we were turning out the lights to go to bed. And bought me a cheapo generic card while the baby and I waited in the car.
This stings because I didn’t even get a card on my 30th birthday a few months ago, let alone a gift.
Gifts are my love language, and I tend to plan and go all out for all of my husband’s major life events. I really am not a tit for tat person, but at a certain point (I have reached it) I start to feel embarrassed. Embarrassed that I care so much and am so hurt, embarrassed by the cavernous difference between what I do for him and vice versa.
Yes, we have talked about it. Over and over, though in the last few years I’ve given up and just resigned myself to the hurt the day of my event and buying myself a gift after the fact.
So here’s my question: should I scale back my observance of my husband’s events (birthday, fathers’ day) to match his lack thereof? He will obviously notice, since he’s used to a gift and the white glove treatment all day, and a card. Does that mean I’m stooping to his level? Does it mean I’m making his special days about me? I love doing nice things for the people I love, and I really don’t want this to ruin his days too (though it always ruins mine, albeit secretly). If I don’t do that, what should I do? Eventually give up expectations of cards or gifts on special days? Keep swallowing the hurt until I’ve got enough scar tissue?
I really like cowl-neck blouse/shirts anyway, and would love to be able to find more of them for my maternity stage.
Seems like I can’t wear them nursing or around kids all day, but they’re great for work/going out – very flattering to me and dressy.
Thanks.
My 7 month sometimes sleeps through the night and sometimes he doesn’t. We’ve done CIO a couple of times now. I can’t really figure out what triggers his nights with wakeups. Frequently when he does have night wakings we end up feeding him around 3-4am because otherwise he is just crying out every hour, and we don’t have the resolve to sleep train him on every random weeknight that he doesn’t make it through the night. I don’t really know what to do at this point. Is it just like this? I feel like every other week is supposed to be some big developmental milestone or regression that will disrupt their mood/sleep. Haven’t really been able to pin down too many cause/effects with my baby generally.. If it is being caused by something like teething, how do you help them sleep through it?
My 26 month old is going through a hitting phase. He doesn’t seem to do it in anger – it’s most directly at me and at Mr. TK, boy will hit us in the face then run away, or hit us with a toy. He giggles. I’ve tried holding both of his hands together, looking him in the eye, and saying “don’t hit Mommy, hitting hurts” but he just thinks its hilarious. Per his teachers, this isn’t a big problem at school.
Until this new behavior, I’d kind of bought into the “No Bad Kids” philosophy that time outs are confusing and counter productive to toddlers, but now I’m wondering if that’s exactly the sort of thing that might be effective here. Thoughts?
Potty training question to kick off the week: has anyone’s toddler been very stressed by peeing in a diaper but refusing to sit on the potty/potty seat?
My 2.5 yr old has started telling us when she’s peeing (yay!) but refuses to try the potty and becomes very upset when she then pees in her diaper. This can lead to 10-15 minutes of crying, even when I try to be very low-key about the whole thing, i.e., no pressure to sit on potty, telling her it’s ok to use her diapers. Her teachers at daycare say she does not exhibit this stress at school. I’d love to progress with potty training since she’s obviously aware of her biological functions now, but her refusal to sit on a potty/potty seat has me thinking we need to back off (yet again). Ideas or advice?