Have You Ever Taken a Vacation Without Your Kids?
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Here’s a question: Have you ever taken a vacation without your kids, leaving them in the loving arms of some other caregiver? Do you and your partner make a habit of this (for example, three weeks every year!), or is it a rare, quick getaway — or would you never, ever take a vacation without your kids?
For my $.02, my parents have never taken a vacation without me, at least as far as I can remember. So my husband and I were really reluctant to leave the kids for more than a night, at least in the beginning. But it is a truth universally acknowledged that a new destination with kids is a trip, not a vacation, so we started to ponder whether vacationing by ourselves was a possibility. By the time my older son got to be around 5, we tried it for a few nights, driving a few hours to a fancyish bed and breakfast place. Not only did the kids survive just fine with the grandparents (even my youngest son!), it was amazingly restorative to both me and my husband, as well as to our relationship. (Always good to remember that you actually like each other, too!) So now, once a year, we try to go away for just a few days — we’ve found the Veterans Day holiday a prime time because the kids usually have school but my husband usually has the day off. That way, we can go for a Sunday–Tuesday kind of thing so the kids still have their regular school schedule on Monday and Tuesday and the grandparents don’t have to fill a long weekend day without additional support. (Last November we went to New Orleans for a few days… we have Auntie M’s wedding to attend in Lake Tahoe this August, though, so that may be our getaway for this year.)
How about you, readers — have you ever taken a vacation without your kids, or would you ever? Where have you gone; what did you do?
Stock photo via Stencil.
We just got back from a 2 night vacation without the kids actually – first time away from our second! We’re planning another trip for just the two of us for a little longer later this summer. We’ve also done vacations for about a week each year when it was just DS1. It definitely helps to have my parents available and willing to watch the kids for multiple days and nights – I am aware of how privileged and lucky we are to do this. I don’t think either of our parents vacationed without us when we were younger, for various reasons. I found it really restorative and it does help us connect again in a way that we haven’t been able to since the kids were born.
I think we’re going to try to do a one-week vacation each year while the kids are little (and my parents are willing!) and then see how everyone feels when everyone’s older and hopefully a little easier to travel with.
We did a weekend away for a wedding when my kid was about 1 year (she stayed with my parents). But in prime toddler stage currently at 2, she’s a lot for my parents to handle for more than a couple of hours, and my inlaws are not physically capable of keeping her at this age at all. We don’t have a good line-up of non-family babysitters either. I think once she’s older we might try to do 1-2 long weekends a year with my parents watching her, and then as she gets older, and maybe gets another sibling, we might pay for one of my sisters to come stay (they are young, fun, childfree and single, i.e., the cool aunts).
Only for weddings when our daughter was very young. She loves to travel, and it doesn’t seem fair to leave her behind. We get our alone time by sending her off on her own adventures–camp, sleepovers, school trips, solo visits to out-of-town family.
Yes, absolutely. We just got back from an 8 day international trip without our 2 year old. She stays with my parents in another state (4 hours away) when we travel. My mom is a teacher who adores my daughter, so she strongly encourages us to go on couples’ vacations a couple of times a year. These vacations have been so good for our entire family, including my daughter. We come back recharged and happy, and my daughter gets to develop a good relationship with her grandparents.
nope. not sure how i could do it.
My husband and I have both done it separately, and we’re planning our first trip together without the kids for next year. I think it’s so healthy to get some alone time and to reconnect. I’m so excited!
Yes, we’ve done a 2 week trip within the US when our eldest was 2.5, and are about to embark on a 2 week international trip without our now 5 year old and younger 2.5 year old. We are very lucky to have grandparents who want to spend time with and care for the children, and this enables us to take these trips. It doesn’t mean we don’t miss our children like crazy – in fact, we prefer taking these trips as a family. But parent only time is important for relationships and so we know this is time we’re investing in each other that will further strengthen our relationship with our children.
Never. My parents never did either. I just feel like I get so little time with my kids, and I want to spend my vacation days with them
So far, we’ve just gone away for the weekend to attend a couple of weddings. Next year, Kiddo will be 5. DH and I are planning a longer (9 day) trip to Hawaii for our 10th anniversary. My parents are planning to fly to where we live and take care of Kiddo at our house. Their condo isn’t really set up for kids (their preference is to travel to or with kid rather than host often), and we can get help from in-laws and paid babysitters so my parents can have a break.
I’m looking forward to some time with just DH. Most of our vacations are with his parents or my parents or visiting other family or friends or attending weddings–all of which are great, but DH and I haven’t done a whole trip just the two of us since our honeymoon, and this will be our 10th anniversary.
I would love to, but I think this is only possible if you have family who are willing and able to keep your kids. I’m really envious of people who can pull this off but I have no idea how we would even go about it.
My husband and I did this for the first time when our first was almost 2, and since then we’ve taken I think 3 trips without the kids (they are now 4 and 2). The longest one was 5 days, and the other 2 trips were 2 days each. Our family got a little tired after the 5 day trip, but it was amazing for our relationship. We plan to keep taking these short trips once or twice a year for the foreseeable future. My parents never took vacations without us, but they also had an awful relationship and eventually got divorced. I believe a happy marriage is among the very best gifts you can give to your children, so if a few days a year away from them helps with that (and I think it does!), that’s well worth it to me.
My parents spent one night away from us when I was about 12 and my sister was 15. I’ve been really reluctant to have an adults-only vacation (tho, curiously, our upbringing seems to have a different influence on my sister bc she spent a week away from her 6 month old). DH and I recently celebrated our 10 wedding anniversary with a concert and a night in a fancy hotel here in town, and it went so well, I’m convinced we can do a longer trip. No concrete plans yet, though.
Nope and – unpopular opinion – I don’t want to.
One week trip when oldest kid was 2. And a one week trip when twins were 2.5. Unfortunately now my parents can’t really handle the kids on their own for more than a night or two. We’re still going to try to take a night or two every year. Also hoping to have twins do sleepovers at grandparents house if older kid starts having a sleepover with friends. Partially influence by marijuana legalization. Legal here now but don’t want to try with kids in the house.
We did a two week European trip this spring while my parents and in-laws watched our 3 year old. So fortunate that our parents were able to travel to us and stay at our house so kiddo’s regular schedule wasn’t interrupted. Loved having an adults-only vacation (Stay up late! No need to plan around naps! Days of long walks/hikes!) BUT by the middle of the second week we were really missing our kiddo and wished he was there with us