CorporetteMoms

Updated: Jul 2, 2020 160 Comments · by

Maternity Monday: ‘Everyday’ Bella Band

CorporetteMoms Hall of Fame· Maternity· Recent Recs

This post may contain affiliate links and CorporetteMoms may earn commissions for purchases made through links in this post. As an Amazon Associate, I earn from qualifying purchases.

A woman wearing an \'Everyday\' Bella BandFor me, the hardest time to dress while pregnant was during the first trimester. I still mostly fit into my clothes, but some of my pre-pregnancy wear gave the impression that I just might be bloated and/or wearing something unflattering. I also found that maternity clothes were made for the late second to third trimesters (obviously depending on how you carry, or whether or not it’s your first pregnancy). To stretch my wardrobe, I bought a Bella Band from Ingrid and Isabel, and I found it very useful. Not only did it help me wear my pre-pregnancy jeans and work pants for longer, it let me wear some pre-pregnancy tops longer, as well — it just looks like a layering tank when peeking out from the bottom of the shirt. If I were to do it again, I probably would order a smaller size, as the material was very stretchy and I found myself having to adjust it on occasion. (Here’s the size guide.) It’s machine washable, tumble dry low, and available at Nordstrom and Amazon in both black and white for $28. ‘Everyday’ Bella Band Building a maternity wardrobe for work? Check out our page with more suggestions along both classic and trendy/seasonal lines. This post contains affiliate links and CorporetteMoms may earn commissions for purchases made through links in this post. For more details see here. Thank you so much for your support!

✨✨✨Sales of note for Cyber Monday 2023✨✨✨

(See all of the latest workwear sales at Corporette!)

Kid/Family Sales

  • Amazon – Up to 25% off car seats, strollers and more from Britax & BOB Gear
  • BabyJogger – 25% off everything
  • Bloomingdale’s – 20% off on select UppaBaby, Maxi-Cosi, Stokke, Bugaboo, Thule, and more
  • Carter’s – 50-60% off entire site; extra 20% off cyber deals with code
  • Crate & Kids – Up to 50% off everything plus free shipping sitewide; save 10% off full price items
  • J.Crew Crewcuts – 50% off everything + free shipping
  • Hanna Andersson – 50% off everything + extra 20% off clearance
  • ErgoBaby – 40% off Omni Breeze Carrier, 25% off Evolve 3-in-1 bouncer, $100 off Metro+Stroller
  • Graco – Up to 30% off car seats
  • Nordstrom – Big deals on CRANE BABY, Joolz, Baby Jogger Summit, Petunia Pickle Bottom, TWELVElittle and Posh Peanut
  • Old Navy – 50% off everything, ends today
  • SNOO / Happiest Baby – 35% off SNOO, up to 60% sitewide (ends today)
  • Target – Up to 40% off nursery furniture, plus sales on HALO Innovations, Graco, activity gyms, and Safety 1st strollers and cribs
  • Pottery Barn Baby – Up to 70% off toys, gifts, plyaroom furniture and more
  • Strolleria – Save 20% on select UPPABaby strollers, up to 25% off Bugaboo, up to 50% off Joolz, and additional deals on Silver Cross, Veer, Doona, Wonderfold, dadada, Clek, and Thule
  • Walmart – Savings on Maxi-Cosi car seats, adventure wagons, rocker recliners, security cameras and more!

See some of our latest articles on CorporetteMoms:

Click here to see our top posts!

And — here are some of our latest threadjacks of interest – working mom questions asked by the commenters!

About April

April is a working mom, a longtime reader of CorporetteMoms, and wrote our morning fashion advice for working moms from April 2018 to October 2020. She has one child (born 2/17!) and she’s a public interest lawyer in NYC.

Comments

  1. Pregnant with Third says

    Internet friends, just found out I’m pregnant with a third kid and I’m reeling a bit. We were planning to try in just a couple months, which makes this feel a bit like a kick in the pants because the timing is so close to being perfect. Instead, I’m going to be going to a big three day event with a ton of people I haven’t seen in a long time while eight weeks pregnant and just looking bloaty (or pregnant, bc I already show early and with this one I definitely will!) but unable to admit it!

    Also give me reassurance please. Second child will be 34 monthish – good age gap?

    And both other kids have fall birthdays and this little bean will be youngest in his or her class, which also makes me nervous. I feel like I’m already not doing right by number three! But third kids tend to be ahead of the curve on school stuff, right?

    Ahhhhh!

    • Anonymous says

      It’s unfortunate that you can’t do shots in pregnancy because I think you need to just chill. People thinking you’re fat isn’t a crisis. 34 months is fine. School will work out. All will be well. Congrats!

      • OP says

        Agh, it’s not the looking fat! It’s the not being able to tell people when clearly I am pregnant and it’ll be weird and also I already had to purchase two dresses which are totally not going to fit anymore so… shopping. Ugh. It’s the whole thing really.

        I’d been planning to wait until after this event to try, but best laid plans and all that!

    • Anonymous says

      I’m just barely on the other side. My 3rd is 2 months old. We got pregnant thefirst month of trying but assumed it would take 6 months or longer like the others! #1 (fall birthday, oldest in class) And #2 (July birthday, near youngest in class) are 33 months apart and it’s perfect. #2 and #3 (also summer birthday) are 22.5 months apart and that’s 6 weeks ofnoregnancy and first 6 weeks post parting were probably the toughest I’ve had as a parent. My toddler was out of control. But we’ve rounded a corner. #3 is an easy baby. She’s sleeping through the night. #2 is finally sleeping through the night (she’d been getting up at 4am screaming…).

      Mine are all girls so I’m not as concerned about the summe r birthdays- though almost all summer boys in our town are red shirted, my toddler is going on time. She already thinks she’s 4.

      • OP says

        This makes me feel better! I’m kind of hoping this is a girl! Really, thank you!

        • Anonymous says

          I’m the poster above. Best advice I have is try like heck to get your kids potty trained well before #3. My first was pretty good at 2, then we got rid of night diapers at 2.5. By the time baby came we’d been solid with potty training for a good 6 months. We definately had to be more hands-on training at 2, but it was so much better than 2 in diapers. Not to mention it’ll be impossible to train with a newborn and before you know it you’ll have a 3.5 y/o still in diapers.

          • Anon says

            And I will say that I liked having two in diapers because finding toilets in public was one fewer thing I had to deal with while having a newborn! Mine are 25 months apart and #1 (a boy) trained super easily at 2.5, when #2 was five months. It was such a non-issue compared to everything else, so do not stress about it.

      • June says

        My birthday is late September and I was always one of the youngest in my class. Sucked for driving age and turning 21, but was glad when all my friends turned 30 first. I also felt like I had an extra year after college to hit life milestones before the dreaded 3-0.

        One of my younger brothers was an august baby and my mom held him back because he’s a boy and because our family is short anyway, but he was so advanced for his age he ended up having to skip into the next grade anyway and be one of the youngest and shortest in the class.

    • Betty says

      Congrats!!! My youngest will be the youngest in her class, as I was (both September birthdays). We are fine with her being “young” in her class. My husband always reminds me that she will either be “young” or “old” for her class. Being young may be challenging, but being the oldest in her class (one of the first to get her driver’s license, hit 18, etc.) isn’t necessarily a better game plan.

      • avocado says

        Yes, someone is always going to be the youngest and someone is always the oldest. Unless there are specific issues that truly warrant redshirting, I think it’s generally better to be on the younger end than the older end, especially with the way schools (at least in our area) have watered down the curriculum. It is better to be challenged than bored.

    • Boston Legal Eagle says

      Congratulations! Sounds like you wanted a third, they just came a little earlier than expected. Just a question on the youngest in the class – if my quick calcs are correct, wouldn’t this put #3 with an April birthday? I know redshirting is a thing, but to me that is nowhere near the youngest in the class (not that there’s anything wrong with that)! Please tell me people aren’t now holding back their spring babies…

      • OP says

        Haha, I was off on my due date, clearly this is new. He or she won’t be youngest, but in Texas people do start red shirting in June/July. June 1st and you might get held back – especially boys. Our date cut-offs are weird.

        It’s so nice you did that math for me! It took me way longer than you! I think I’m also disappointed in the grade because I know several friends who’ll be having or trying to have kids in the grade after and it would have been fun to line up (like my first kids godparents will be trying for their first – really good friends), but we can’t pick our kids friends anyways…

        And I am excited about a third! It’s just… a lot!

        • Anonymous says

          You can’t. And you have no idea when or if any of these people will have a baby.

        • Anonymous says

          It’s not normal to try to time your kids to your friends’ kids. It’s take people wildly varying amounts of time to conceive – from one month to many years, so this is just not practical.

      • Anonymous says

        Yes am also very confused by this. An April Birthday isn’t youngest in the class territory.

        • SC says

          My son has a (late) April birthday, and last year he was the youngest in his class (2-3 year olds). Our daycare’s director talked about holding him back but decided not to. I’m sure it will be discussed again this year before he goes (or doesn’t go) to pre-K. I’m not opposed to holding him back because he is behind on social skills, which are important for pre-K and kindergarten.

          The cut-off for our school is July. I’m not sure where the May and June babies were last year–maybe just a different classroom.

      • Anonymous says

        The amount of focus people have on trying to make sure their boys are big enough for sports horrifies me. Absolutely if your child of either gender isn’t developmentally ready for a grade, hold them back. But red shirting is an athletic term not by coincidence!

        • OP says

          Oh our kids will be bad at sports. I’ve just seen social maturity be an issue with kids who are at the young – or old! – end of the spectrum. That’s more what I worry about. They will definitely not be excelling athletically!

          • Anonymous says

            I was a May birthday with an Aug. 1 cutoff. I was socially immature (not disruptive, just shy and clingy to my parents) and my preschool teachers highly recommended “redshirting” me. I ended up having to skip second grade because I was so bored academically, and by senior year I”d run out of honors/AP classes at my high school and was taking college classes. Don’t stress about this. You might have an academically advanced kid, or you can hold him/her back. Either is fine.

    • Anonymous says

      The earliest I’ve ever heard of a school cutoff is in August…this baby will be born in May, right? So that’s nowhere near youngest in the class.
      It seems like you have a lot of anxiety. I hope you’re getting some help for it.

      • OP says

        No, it’s just very new. At private schools in my Texas city, boys born in June/July are almost always held back. Girls it goes either way. June 1 is the cut-off. Again, I’m sure it will be fine, but my brother was the youngest and he was just so socially immature that I think it was harder for him. Definitely no athletes in this family.

        really interesting to hear how far off the cut-off dates are for the rest of the country!

        • Anonymous says

          Send them to public school with the commoners then. 9/1 cut off in Texas.

          • OP says

            Oh our school we are zoned to is not great, so that’s what we are thinking right now. We could move, that’s definitely an option, and then the cut-off becomes normal! But just in the current world, I do think we’d go private. That’s a whole other convo!

      • Anonymous says

        In my (Massachusetts!) own, cutoff is 9/31 but according to the district 25% of birthdays May-Sept are redshirted. If you dig closer almost all of those are boys do over half of summer bdays are held back. I’m a June birthday and was young-ish for my class but I literally never noticed. I did great.

    • Years please says

      Maybe I’m not deep enough in the parenting game but can we please speak in years not months?

      • Years Please says

        Note – I understand before the age of 2 why months are relevant. But after that…? Let me know if I’m missing something.

      • Anonymous says

        I am fairly deep into parenting and yes, beyond age 2, kids ages are in years. The kids will be almost 3 years apart.

        • OP says

          Oh i’m sorry, I’m just doing a lot of math this morning. Mostly badly. Thanks for those with the advice and the reassurance on the young end. I’d like to tell people in real life I’m pregnant but I also want to wait until a doctor’s appointment, even for the closer ones. It’s just… surprising.

          • Anonymous says

            Again, I really do think everything is going to be fine!!! I Under it’s not exactly what you planned but it can’t be that surprising? You’ve been banging your husband?

    • PregLawyer says

      First – congratulations!!!! Second – you’re taking a fair amount of heat, which I think it a bit undeserved. I remember crazy pregnant lady brain and also getting preoccupied with timing. I originally wanted my kids to be closer to two years apart, but it took a while to get pregnant with my second, and now they’re three years apart. I also have some of the same stresses as you about school – my first was born at the end of June and the second was born mid-March. We’ll figure it out!

      Anyway, congrats on #3!

      • M says

        Congratulations! Also fascinated about the cut-offs coming from New York public schools where the cut-offs are December. It’s crazy to think that other states are a full six plus months ahead!
        It’s your third, so I’m sure you will roll with it as you have been this comments thread – the tone definitely seems off this morning!

        • OP says

          Aw thanks all! I appreciate it! Yeah, I have crazy pregnant lady brain already. It’ll wear off, maybe even in a few days time.

          I was “banging my husband” but I was also tracking my fertility and we were a bit careless but the timing of this should not have worked out according to my calculator! I’m not allowed to take hormonal birth control for health reasons, so there was clearly more risk involved, but this was some really early ovulation! Cautionary tale, except I’m sure we are going to be super excited about this in a month…

          but really thanks for the congrats all! It’s nice to hear. As I plan to dig out my maternity clothes box again ughhhh!

          • Walnut says

            Was there some weird blip in the universe this past summer because I also should definitely not have gotten pregnant the week I conceived. It doesn’t line up and I’ve been successfully pregnant/not pregnant for more than a decade with NFP.

            The only reassuring part is that we were planning this child eventually and now my husband can take care of things rather than accidentally ending up with a fourth.

        • Anonymous says

          No public schools have a June cutoff. OP’s talking about private schools. Aug/Sept cutoffs are common in the Midwest though. I had a late July birthday and was very young in my Midwestern public school. It was a shock when I got to college in New England and about half the kids in my class were younger than me.

    • Walnut says

      I’m also expecting my third earlier than I had initially planned – I’ll barely miss an entrance into the three under three club.

      My thought processes have been so weird with the third. I’m spiraling over having a “winter baby” when my other two were summer/fall. I’m thinking about friends kids who will be just slightly older. I’m definitely questioning my sanity in having three kids so soon, even though it’s ultimately what I wanted and I’m spiraling that to having three kids in high school/college/etc.

      With my second it was like, “Cool, I know what I’m doing.” and with the third I’m just a hot mess for no good reason.

      • OP says

        Haha, I’m glad I’m not the only one. I feel the same already. And I hope this isn’t a precursor!

    • Anonymous says

      My second is 35 months older than my third. The baby is now 8 months, and the entire time, he has been SO. SWEET. with the baby. It is a wonderful thing to witness. And I don’t know about the age gap between your oldest ones, but this is much easier than a gap of 2 years, which is what I had between my first two. We got pregnant before we really committed to trying, so I was a bit shell-shocked like you (even though we did want a third!)

    • BigLaw Sr Assoc says

      To give you perspective, I was unexpectedly pregnant with twins in my late 40s. They were born in early August. I already had a teenager and a tween. You’ll be fine. Just relax!

  2. Anonymous says

    Can we talk about the arsenic/lead in baby food story? From the article, it sounds like heavy metals occur in a lot of foods naturally, so making your own baby food isn’t a solution. It seems like the best strategy is to vary what your kid gets and make sure they’re not getting any one food more than about once or twice a week, but that seems so hard, especially for working parents with picky kids. Anyone changing what they feed their kids based on this?
    https://www.consumerreports.org/food-safety/heavy-metals-in-baby-food/

    • Anon says

      This freaked me out too. Especially since they say home cooking doesn’t really fix the problem completely, part of the problem however is the packaging method. That does raise the levels. In general I am sad for our earth because its pretty bad when we can’t eat things because of absorbing toxic stuff in our soil.

      I guess my focus will be on variety of foods and cooking things myself as much as possible so you don’t have the packaging concerns.

    • Anonymous says

      I scrolled through and I’ve definitely given my kid a couple of the “more concern” ones. Specifically the mum-mums. He loves those things.

      The ped does test for lead, so at least you know your baby isn’t actually getting toxic levels if their test results come back ok.

      It does seem that avoiding rice-based products is key. I wonder how much they’ve looked into people who’ve gone gluten-free and started eating a ton of rice-based products (rather than wheat) and what their blood levels are.

      • Betty says

        My son and husband have Celiac’s, which means we are firmly in the no-gluten territory. Rice is the alternative used in many products, and a similar study was released by Consumer Reports several years ago. I raised this concern with both our pediatric gastroenterologist and our registered dietitian. I don’t remember the specifics of the conversation, but my general take away was that this was a Consumer Reports study, not a peer-reviewed medical study. The general advice is that simply subbing gluten-free versions of your favorite foods is not a great approach, and we try and eat more naturally gluten free foods anyway. That being said, we do eat a fair amount of rice-based products. With all of the health issues in my family (Celiac’s, Crohn’s, ASD, T1D…) I simply cannot freak over every CR study. I don’t have the bandwidth. We do our best to eat a healthy, balanced diet, and that is the best that we can do.

    • Anonymous says

      It’s been pretty well known for a while that rice and rice flour have enough arsenic to be problematic even for adults if eaten regularly, especially in gluten-free people who replace all wheat-based products with rice-based ones. I don’t serve my kids rice or products made with rice flour at home – it’s a rare treat when we’re at an Asian restaurant. I don’t worry about oat or wheat cereal or veggies, and nothing in the Consumer Report really changed my mind. I’m sure with veggies the benefits outweigh the downsides, and cereal is really an essential for most parents because kids love it and it’s easy. For veggies, we try to mix it up and serve at least 3-4 different veggies each week. Frozen vegetables help with this.

  3. Anon says

    Whine: 14 weeks pregnant. Docs took me off of my autoimmune meds last week because they didn’t want me on them my whole pregnancy. Woke up this morning unable to move without tons of pain. I also have a have a really really really bad cold that I got last week because previously mentioned autoimmune drugs also lower your immunity so you pick up everything. So I have a head cold: congestion, runny nose, cough, sneezing, sore throat, etc. and I am immobile and every time I sneeze I scream because my back hurts so bad. The kicker: My husband left for a work trip yesterday on the other side of the country. And now probably has to fly back early to care for me because I can’t really move and the meds they would give me to fix this I can’t take while pregnant. Did I mention I still have morning sickness? It gets better right? I just keep telling myself how grateful I am that I don’t have kids yet and this is the first pregnancy and I can just worry about myself and that we have good health insurance and that I usually have mobility!

    • lsw says

      Ugh, I am so sorry. Pregnancy was the worst. The day you have your kid so many health things will improve. That sounds really tough and I’m so sorry!

    • Anonymous says

      That sounds horrible. I’m sorry you’re going through that. It is temporary, but I know it doesn’t feel that way in the moment.

    • Anonanonanon says

      It will get better. And by get better I mean the baby will be born and you can go back on your meds. I have an autoimmune disease as well and had to stop my infusions while pregnant (but got to go on steroids for the last two months of pregnancy which helped) and my condition flared. It was so miserable at the time but all you can do is power through one day at a time and it’ll be over eventually. Hang in there mama.

  4. lsw says

    Help! My toddler is painting with his poop.

    For the third time in a week or so, we came into our 2yo’s room to find that he has used his finger and his poop to “draw” on his sheets. This morning I tried to talk to him in the tub and explain why he shouldn’t play with his poop, but I doubt he really took much from that. His receptive language is decent but he is not super verbal.

    We have only one pair of pajamas that are like a onesie. He’s really tall, so two-piece pajamas have been our lifesaver. We tried the pair of onesie pajamas we have but of course he didn’t poop that night. He has tons of pajamas and I hate to just buy more but is the best solution to just put him in onesies so he can’t reach in there?

      • lsw says

        Oh duh, why didn’t I think of that? We’ve gotten out of the habit of using them in the summer but that makes sense.

        • Pigpen's Mama says

          And try them backwards if you can. My LO was able to unzip the footie zippered PJs and strip down at that age. Luckily we were able to catch her before she went into full Jackson Pollack mode with her poop and it stopped after a few weeks.

          • lsw says

            Yes! He can somehow take down the zipper of the sleepsack occasionally so we need to try the backwards thing. Thank you for the tips!

            In related news, recently our daycare daily report sheet said “[Toddler] loves painting and big messy projects and takes great pride in his work.” My husband and I have been cracking up about that in the wake of the great poop painting of 2018.

    • Anonymous says

      I think you need to deal with this firmer. Don’t explain why. When you come in
      “No! This is BAD! We do not play with poop.”

      • Ella says

        +1. I think this warrants a very stern admonition and then if done a second time a couple of minutes of time out.

        • Anon says

          I completely disagree that a time out is appropriate.

          No 2 year old has the emotional capacity to put a time out and behavior like this together. Its not like at 5:30 am when he wakes up he will think “oh no I shouldn’t play with my poo because then I might have a time out in 30 minutes.” That type of thinking is not developed yet.

          Timeouts work if they are being removed from an activity that they enjoy – ie friends are over, the kid hits a friend and they are removed when the friends are there are they can’t participate socially for a few minutes. Time outs work if they follow the behavior you want to decrease immediately. However, in this case you have no idea how long it is from him painting with poo and the parents finding him. The consequence would not be immediate enough. Also this isn’t a behavior that has a good time out.
          What are they going to do- leave him in his poo filled diaper in the middle of the morning routine to reflect on what he did?

    • Betty says

      You can try cutting the feet out of the footie pajamas and zip them backwards. My darling daughter enjoyed stripping in her crib in the mornings.

      • Clementine says

        +1 This is the one piece of advice about kids my BIL gave me. If/when they start taking off their diaper and poo-cassoing it, cut the feet off of PJ’s and zip them in backwards.

      • Anonymous says

        We also found that putting a regular t-shirt over the footie pajamas (backward or forward) foiled the attempts to disrobe. Son wasn’t adept enough to get a shirt off at that age.

    • Hi there says

      Over the Rhine has a really funny song about how “Poop goes in the Potty. (“Not on the walls, not in your hair, …”

    • Edna Mazur says

      I know people that have had luck putting the outside snapping part of a cloth diaper over the disposable really tightly. The snaps were harder for kiddo than the diaper tabs.

    • BabyBoom says

      My very tall 2 year old also discovered the joy of playing with her poop. Carter’s makes footless zip-up sleepers. Also you can get sleeveless onsies on amazon up to 6T. that snap between the legs. We got her some 4t oncises from CBO baby. She has not figured out the snaps yet. They aren’t the best thing to look at, but they are better than cleaning up poop. There were two poop playing instances at first. It has been a month or so without any further incidents.

  5. Contractor vs. employee says

    I’m thinking about asking to take on a contractor type role within my company. I think it allow me to control my workload, not have to worry about bunch of internal office politics, and be able to work fomr home / have more control over time.

    I understand I will have not benefits and less job security, but what are the other things I should be considering? Has anyone successfully gone from an employee to a contractor with a firm? What should I be considering?

    Thanks in advance!

    • Anonymous says

      IME your taxes will be much higher. With that on top of less job security and no benefits, you should ask for a very significant pay raise.

    • Anonymous says

      How will this allow you to control your workload more? If you don’t do the amount of work they want, couldn’t they just hire someone else? I would be very cautious about this type of arrangement unless you are in a very high demand field. If they let you go as a contractor they would not owe you any severance. Did they suggest this or you?

      • Contractor vs. employee says

        I was thinking about asking, but doing more research on it this morning, I think a better plan of action would be to limit the number of transactions I do in a given month(i work in a deal type environment, which move quickly) and stay on as an employee and negotiate an appropriate pay. For all the reasons you guys mentioned, it seems becoming a contractor wouldn’t be very wise.

  6. Aly says

    Fibre rich recipes? I’m in the first trimester, but the dreaded preggo constipation has hit me again… Anything with tons of ground flax would be appreciated. Also, I have wicked nausea, so bland foods are extra appreciated.

    • Anon says

      Smoothies you can add flax to and other things and it gets hidden. I also found them easy to eat because they were cold so no smells and not a lot of taste

      I also made myself breakfast power cookies that had lots of good ingredients in them like flax seed and then put them in my freezer and would eat them cold in the morning when my stomach couldn’t handle anything else.

      • Anonymous says

        +1 to smoothies. Also, my OB had me add Miralax at some point (I think when I got put on iron?). She said it was totally fine for pregnancy, and blending it into the smoothie I couldn’t even taste it.

        I also like Fiber One bars.

    • Anonymous says

      Just take a Metamucil pill. Much easier than trying to choke down a food that nauseates you.

    • Anonymous says

      Dry fiber rich cereal? I also did well with fruit during pregnancy. Most have a respectable amount of fiber. Steel cut oats. The Better Oats brand is a staple in my house – microwave instant and includes flax right in the packet.

    • Anonymous says

      I ate Autumn Wheat cereal as a bland snack in the first trimester that helped with this problem.

      • Anonymous says

        But be careful. I learned the hard way (not when pregnant) that if not prepared properly, chia seeds absorb water in the digestive system and cause constipation.

    • Anonymous says

      Ugh, I’ve had this problem for both pregnancies too. If it’s not going to trigger nausea, lentils pack a ton of fiber. I make a cold salad with lentil, carrots, tomatoes, red onions, parsley, oil/redwine vinegar, and feta. Also: avocados are surprisingly high in fiber. I smash half of one over two slices of a high fiber (5g per slice) from trader joes for breakfast. I also need a daily coffee and sometimes a colace.

    • BC says

      If your pre-natal has added iron, you might want to talk with your OB about whether it is necessary because eliminating it might be a quick fix.

  7. Yogurt says

    Talk to me about yogurt. My 1 year old and a generally good eater will not touch, and has never, the plain whole milk variety (greek, non-greek, organic, non-organic, every brand my store carries, fruit mixed in, puree mixed in, just nope). My husband gave her one of the “baby” whole milk yogurts that was blueberry flavored and she kept asking for more. I personally detest every yogurt I’ve ever tried (but wish I could get it down without gagging, because it seems so good and easy and just ugh). So, am I a terrible mom for giving my kid what I suspect is sugar covered yogurt (implication from my online mom’s group when another mom asked about yogurt where 90%+ are SAHMs with time to try endless pureed fruit combos in whole milk plain greek yogurt and convince their toddlers to eat it by whispering sweet nothings in their ears)? I am working off the some yogurt + sugar is better than no yogurt theory. Any brands or recommendations your picky toddlers like?

    • Anonymous says

      I’m not a doctor but I think no yogurt might be better than the extra sugary yougurt? Does she eat cheese and/or drunk milk? If so she’s probably getting enough dairy. I’ve never eaten yogurt and I’ve always been really tall for my age. Plain yougurt is definitely healthy but not all healthy food are essential to grow well.

      • Ella says

        +1. If she’s getting enough dairy, and has other paths to gain microbiota (e.g. plays in dirt, has a pet etc.), I don’t see why you need yogurt.

      • Anon in NYC says

        Yes, agreed. My daughter also hates yogurt, so I just don’t give it to her. She drinks milk and eats cheese, so I just don’t worry about it.

        I personally am not so anti-sugar that I think it’s *bad* to give your kid sweetened yogurt, but also, I just don’t think it’s necessary to give her yogurt if she has other sources of fat and calcium.

      • Anonymous says

        Totally not required, but if you’re trying to get her to eat plain yogurt, we also spread it on toast, waffles or banana/zucchini bread. Those food items contain sugar, too, so not sure where you fall on those.

        Have you tried letting her feed herself? Sometimes my 1yo refuses a food unless I let him hold the spoon. Caveat: he sometimes ends up covered in yogurt. So not sure how much actually gets in his stomach…

    • Anonymous says

      You could also try mixing with some fruit from a pouch. We did that with kiddo’s oatmeal sometimes. Can’t remember if we did it with yogurt. It is possible.

      You can always ask your pediatrician. Ours have always done a great job of providing advice on balancing stuff like this. They’ve almost all been working parents, too, and can totally relate to the struggle.

    • Anon. says

      My 14-mo-old LOVES vanilla greek yogurt and despises plain yogurt. I do not blame him – I feel the exact same way. Yes it has sugar but he’s pretty terrible about drinking milk so he gets yogurt every day for breakfast (and sometimes a snack too). I have decided not to stress about it.

    • Anonymous says

      Kid yogurt has as much sugar as many desserts. Not judging if you want to give it as a treat, but I would not consider it a healthy food that kiddo can have in unlimited quantities.

    • Anonymous says

      We give the sugary, berry-flavored (or sometimes – gasp! – vanilla) whole-milk yogurt. No guilt.

    • Aly says

      I have a mix in my house. Sometimes we get the sugary kind and she can have one a day (whenever I hit up costco and buy the 9% fat liberte yogurt – swoon). The rest of the time we have plain yogurt and she can have that if she wants. She goes for the the sugar laden kind more, but whatever. So do I.

    • avocado says

      There is really not much sugar in baby yogurt. YoBaby fruit flavors have 4g more sugar per serving than the plain. Plain yogurt is icky. I don’t know a single adult who eats plain yogurt without something tasty mixed in–fruit, granola, etc.

      In my experience, the idea that you can set a child’s future taste preferences through what you feed her as a baby is a load of bunk. Until she was about 2.5, my kid was basically a human garbage disposal. She would eat just about anything (except, of course, homemade baby food). Then at 2.5 she suddenly decided she hated all food. I know many other parents who had the same experience. So I wouldn’t stress too much about yogurt flavors. The type of yogurt she likes as an infant has zero bearing on the type of yogurt she will agree to eat as an older kid.

      • Anon says

        Just FYI – pretty common in many other cultures to eat yogurt plain :) I’m Indian, and have been eating plain yogurt as a part of traditional meals since I was a kid. Used as a “dip” to quell heat in things, or dolloped on top of rice/lentils, or just spooned plain between bites. For this reason, never got a taste for the flavored stuff. But, definitely have a taste for PLENTY of other less-than-desirable foods…Dor!tos, anyone?

    • Anonymous says

      It’s not about sugary yoghurt vs. no yoghurt. Plain unsweetened yoghurt (most plain varieties are sweetened) is healthy. Sugary kid yoghurt is a treat food. So it just changes whether it’s a main meal food vs a treat.

      We do plain unsweetened yoghurt and add jam/honey/pistachios/oatmeal/etc depending on kid’s tastes. Allows us to control the amount/type of sugar. Also means I don’t have to have a bunch of different types of yoghurt in my fridge.

      • Anonymous says

        Plain yogurt does not have added sugar – that’s what plain means, there’s absolutely nothing added to it. You may be confusing it with vanilla yogurt, which has added sugar.

        • Anonymous says

          Many brands have both a plain sweetened that has added sugar and a plain unsweetened with no added sugar. Activia is just one brand like that. Some brands have only plain unsweetened or only plain sweetened.

          Vanilla yoghurt is something entirely different. It’s a flavor of yoghurt.

          • Anonymous says

            This is off topic at this point, but judging by your spelling, I’m guessing you’re not in the US. I’ve never seen plain, sweetened yogurt in any store in the US. All the plain yogurts are unsweetened while the sweetened yogurt has flavoring.

          • Anonymous says

            When we vacationed in Mexico earlier this year, sweetened, plain yogurt was totally a thing. I’ve never seen it in the US, but also never looked for it.

          • Anonymous says

            Plain yogurt naturally has some sweetness, but plain yogurt with sugar added is really hard to find, at least in the US.

    • Anonymous says

      We do plain whole milk yogurt with a dash of cinnamon. And often mixed in with oatmeal.

    • Anonymous says

      Can I thread jack this to ask another yogurt question? My 7 month old currently loves plain yogurt, but we can only buy it in GIANT tubs and she’s not eating much. How long does it keep in the fridge once opened? It’s organic, if it matters. For adults, I wouldn’t hesitate to keep it a week or even two, but I know babies have more sensitive immune systems (although she chews on anything and everything she can get her hands on, and we have a dog, so it’s not like she’s not being exposed to germs). DH and I hate yogurt so whatever she doesn’t eat gets thrown out.

      • BC says

        Yogurt is fine until it starts to grow mold or other yucky stuff. You can also portion it out and freeze it if you’re concerned.

      • Anonymous says

        I get the Fage 5% tub. It’s large, but smaller than most other brands.

        • Anonymous says

          Or you could get the Fage ones where they separate the yogurt from the flavor and just not use the flavor side.

    • Knope says

      I also think it’s not at at all necessary for your kid to get yogurt, but if you insist, we mix a serving of yogurt with a 1/2 tablespoon of apple butter. It makes the yogurt taste somewhat sweet, but that doesn’t add nearly as much sugar as the flavored pre-packaged yogurts.

      • Anonymous says

        Oh yum!!! That sounds divine. The Stonybrook baby ones have an apple flavor that my entire family totally loves, but we don’t buy those anymore. We get the Stonybrook pouches because they’re so much less mess. I would love to do that for myself, too. I’ve mixed PB in before. It doesn’t mix the best, so results are that fantastic.

    • Anonymous says

      We have Gogurt in our freezer. Your kid will be fine with the baby yogurt!

    • AIMS says

      Stonyfield mango baby yogurt has no added sugar, just mango puree. I buy low sugar, full fat yogurt for my kids and don’t worry about it. What’s funny is my daughter now likes yogurt to the point where she is happy to eat it plain as well. We add berries and she calls it “grown up yogurt.”

  8. Weaning says

    Guys, talk to me about weaning. LO is about to turn 13 mos. He drinks whole cow’s milk like a champ (10oz while at daycare) and we nurse morning and night.

    I just got back from a trip, and while I tried to keep up my pumping, I have a feeling my supply really tanked. He has to work pretty hard to get my milk to let down and the last day or so he has given up a couple times. I feel like I have to really cajole him into nursing, he’s too busy looking around for the cat or his books or whatever.

    This is the end right? I’m just so much more torn than I thought I’d be. I’ve read “don’t offer, don’t refuse” and if I’m being honest, he has never “asked” to nurse in his life. I think because I travel so much he’s gotten over nursing as a comfort mechanism. He’s just as happy to have his lovey.

    Has anyone been there, where you were more into nursing that your LO? Did you just let it end? I cannot believe after all the trouble I had b-feeding I’m agonizing over this! I should consider myself really lucky.

    • Anonymous says

      This is 100% me with all three kids. I was off for a year with each (Canadian). I went back to work full time at 12 months and just nursed morning and night with no pumping. All weaned about 16 months on their own. I offered at each feed (but didn’t push it) for about 5 days – week so I could be sure they were done and it wasn’t just a nursing strike.

      It’s okay to feel sad about it ending. Nursing is a relationship and just because it has really hard moments sometimes, you can still miss it when it ends before you’re ready.

      Try making a list of all the pluses about nursing anymore – cutes bras, cozy crewneck sweaters and not having to figure out how to nurse when doing outdoor winter activities like skiing or snowshoeing where big ones for me.

    • Knope says

      I don’t have any studies to back this up, but I am convinced that this is a hormonal response. While breastfeeding your body is telling you YOU MUST FEED BABY! and the thought of stopping makes you feel sad/guilty/etc. This happened to me every time I dropped a pump or feeding. But I always felt no regret afterwards. It’s ok to feel sad, but I think you know it’s time. Rip off the bandaid, and I think you will feel just fine after.

      • OP says

        That sounds like an excellent point. I like Anon above suggesting giving it a week where I don’t really force it and see if we’re really done.

        As great as it is not to be in the “my kid is stuck to my b00b camp”, it also made me feel a little weird that at 13mo he seems totally over it. Trying not to take it personally!

        • Anon in NYC says

          My daughter was never really into nursing, even as a baby. She nursed but also wasn’t all about it. She stopped at 15 months and didn’t seem phased at all. I didn’t have a deep attachment to nursing, but I felt the teeniest bit rejected. I got over it when I realized that my body was now fully my own!

  9. Anonymous says

    What kinds of toys do you get 6-9 month olds who are not quite mobile? My 7 month old isn’t crawling yet, but she’s scooting a little and rolling, and seems to have outgrown her activity mat because whenever she rolls, she hits one of the overhead bars and cries (from frustration, not pain, I’m pretty sure). I was thinking about getting some of those foam tiles for the floor, but thought people here might have better suggestions.

    • Anon says

      At that age, my DD loved the kick n play piano (either in kicking position or sitting up and banging, if she is a good sitter). Stacking cups while sitting, chasing after the original oball, the fisherprice puppy singing remote toy (still a favorite at 13 months), and the shape-sorter like toys (mostly for chewing purposes, but occasionally she liked putting things in buckets). Also any and all kitchen implements specifically not designed to be a baby toy – metal bowls and wooden spoons make excellent drum sets, hats, swords, etc.

    • PregLawyer says

      I have a box that I fill full of things – oball, stacking cups, little stuffed animals, blocks, teethers, plastic keys, small board books, cloth books, other baby appropriate toys, etc. Sit them in front of the box and let them pull things out and sift through.

      I also have the Baby Einstein activity center that provides endless entertainment.

  10. Anonymous says

    My 13 month old who formerly ate *anything* like a champ has suddenly developed some very strong opinions on food. And of course he is rejecting the healthiest things—specifically any and all veggies. I used to mix them in with whole wheat pasta and he would devour it. Now he is rejecting the veggies and the pasta. And he will not eat them outright anymore either—even with light seasoning. My daughter loved and still loves veggies.

    How do I get this kid to eat?? He is too young for Sater of course. So any thoughts?

    • Anonymous says

      My ped’s attitude was just give up and try again in a month or two. Kids change fast at this age and forcing them to eat (even a healthy food) is asking for lifelong food issues. Plenty of kids survive on mac and cheese and spaghetti for many years. Of course you want your kid to eat veggies, but it’s really not the end of the world if he doesn’t.

    • Pogo says

      I’m in a BLW facebook group and every time someone asks they respond “toddler pickiness is a normal phase. keep offering a variety of foods”. So, that’s what I’ve been doing. I have a 13mo and we have the exact same issue.

      It does work, sorta. Like I offer green beans and 1/5 times he’ll actually eat them. I try to limit the amount of one thing I put on his tray in case he decides he doesn’t want that, because he has gotten in the habit of chucking the things he doesn’t want OR feeding them to the cat if he knows the cat likes that item.

      Then again, he devoured lobster the other night. You never know what they’ll be into that day, so I think for the 1/5 times he eats the green beans it’s important I keep offering them.

    • Puddlejumper says

      I have a couple documents I wrote out for parents in my classroom who had picky eaters. If you post your email I can send them to you. They are long and not all things will work with a 13 month old but some will.

    • Anonymous says

      Try mashing them instead? Is he teething and they make his gums sore? Offer bites from your plate as well but don’t stress as it’s likely just a phase.

    • Anon says

      My child rejected plain roasted sweet potato, but devoured it when covered in chili powder. Maybe try some stronger seasonings? I’ve also had friends who have luck with a little vinegar splashed over veggies. Does caramelizing the sweeter veggies work (i.e., roasting at high temps)? My personal default trick is to cover them with cheese (to this day, the only way my husband eats broccoli). Smoothies with pureed greens?

      Also, the only vegetables I ate as kid were corn, potatoes and ice berg lettuce (covered in ranch dressing, naturally). As an adult, I very much enjoy vegetables, other than green beans. So it may be a phase, but I certainly think I turned out okay. My advice would just be to keep offering and don’t turn it into a war.

    • Anonymous says

      I wrote a comment but have no idea what happened to it. Anyway, solidarity: my once “ate everything” 13mo also rejects most veggies. I continue to offer because sometimes he surprises me and eats them.

    • Anonymous says

      OP here—thanks all for the suggestions and solidarity! I will try some different seasonings. Smothered in spaghetti sauce used to work, so maybe something new will now!

      Now to help my poor three year old understand that sometimes baby brother is going to get special meals when she is expected to eat what I give her….

  11. Anon says

    Talk to me about fertility monitors, please! Did anyone use one / have one they recommend? Trying for our first and I’m 36, so I figure it couldn’t hurt. The Clear Blue Fertility Monitor looks like it does what I would want a fertility monitor to do, anyone use that one in particular. Or is this all a waste of anxiety/money? Is there a good place to read people’s experiences with these?

    • blueridge29 says

      I used the Clear Blue Fertility Monitor. I liked it because it identified when I was ovulating and isolated like 3-4 HOT days that were the best to try to conceive. Temping did not work for me …apparently I am a vampire and run cold. We used the monitor to get pregnant twice and it worked within 3 to 4 months each time. We had tried to conceive without the monitor for over 6 months without success. Mentally it made me feel like we were focusing our efforts and allowed me to mentally relax most of the month. Our first pregnancy ended in an early miscarriage so anything I could do to feel like I had some control after that helped. Best of luck!

    • Anon says

      So I use the ClearBlue monitor off-label to avoid pregnancy right now (NFP), but based on how it works and how sensitive it is to even slight changes in hormone levels, I bet it would be very helpful in TTC (unless you have PCOS or another hormonal imbalance). It’s fascinating to me to track my cycle…really, THAT is what should be taught in health class.

    • Anonymous says

      I used the Clear Blue Advanced Digital Ovulation Test. Mostly because I’m cheap and didn’t want to shell out for the Fertility Monitor. I was still breastfeeding when trying to conceive our second, so this helped confirm when I was ovulating.

    • oil in houston says

      you absolutely want an ovulation kit if you’re not temping and are keen not to waste time. I was using the clearblue digital and loved it. the cheaper sticks are a pain to read

      • AwayEmily says

        I’ve used both the OPK sticks and the ClearBlue Digital Advanced Ovulation test and agree that if you’re okay spending the money, the ClearBlue is easier. Also a lot more expensive, though.

    • Anonymous says

      I used Clear Blue but quit after a month. It was stressing me out too much.

      I didn’t temp or anything, DH and I just did the ‘every other day’ method from What to Expect When You’re Expecting. Not sure if it was just luck but we got pregnant the first month on my first pregnancy and the second month on my second pregnancy. The first month of my second pregnancy was the only month I used Clear Blue.

      This obviously doesn’t work too well if your DH travels more than a few days a month.

      • Anonymous says

        argh. Didn’t use Clear Blue on the first month of my second pregnancy as that makes no sense. Used Clear Blue the first month of trying to get pregnant with my second kid

    • Anon says

      Money isn’t a concern within reason, ease of use is! We have travel schedules to work around and just plain exhaustion (both in biglaw), so I don’t think the every other day method is the best for us. Also, I think I’ll do better with the waiting and general uncertainty of TTC if I can get a sense of if/when I’m ovulating. It seems like even if it takes 6 months (at which point we’d be headed to the doctor and at least I would have data to show them) it would still be less than $500 ($110 for the monitor and about $40-50) a month for the refills?

      • Anonymous says

        Yea it sounds like a good choice for you. Also, if you start this right away you will be able to detect if you have some issues causing you not to ovulate. My friend just sadly discovered this, but was glad to find it out early and have data so her doctor didn’t make her wait for a year of trying (she’s 32) before seeing an RE.

      • Pogo says

        As an FYI, don’t expect ClearBlue to diagnose non-ovulating issues. I have PCOS, do not ovulate, and got plenty of smiley faces on the ClearBlue. It detects an LH surge, but my issues were caused by an LH/FSH imbalance.

        However, I’m still glad I used it (to no success) because it did help me feel like I was doing something. And temping was a pain.

        • Anonymous says

          Ah, good point. I suppose my friend had an issue causing LH not to surge, so she was able to tell on the fertility monitor.

  12. RNMP says

    Any tips on how to dress my string bean toddler? She just turned 2, 91st percentile for height and 11th for weight. Her 2T pants are starting to be short but 3T is way too loose and dresses fit more like tunics. Any good brands for tall kids?

    • BC says

      I have a boy like that, but have had good experience with the Jumping Beans brand from Kohls, Children’s Place, and sometimes Gymboree.

    • Anonymous says

      Same problem here!!

      Cat and Jack leggings and Tea leggings have been great for my daughter.

      Also Gap jeans with the adjustable tabs inside the waits NOT the elastic waist (those fall down immediately!).

    • CCLA says

      Another vote for Cat and Jack. My little is similarly proportioned, and we buy her clothes almost exclusively from that brand. The Carters clothes we get as gifts are laughably wide on her. Some C&J are still too wide, but mostly the leggings and anything with drawstrings work well. She does like some of the stuff from the boys’ section which is, infuriatingly, sized totally differently, so we end up buying her a size down in some of the boys’ stuff.

    • AwayEmily says

      As the parent of a 2-year-old with the opposite body shape (she is still rocking the toddler belly), this is also a useful guide to what brands to avoid.

      I’ve also found that Primary runs pretty slim.

      Oh, and Uniqlo toddler leggings run long (and are very good quality for the money)

    • Anonymous says

      H&M leggings or H&M pants with the adjustable waist band. Some Old Navy pants and shorts have adjustable waist bands too. Carters is cut super wide so avoid there.

  13. Facepalm says

    My MIL just saw a photo of my (very pale) Caucasian baby playing with an African-American baby boy and thought he was my daughter. This is a sign we need to visit the grandparents more isn’t it….

  14. Turtle says

    Does going back to work after mat leave get better? First 2.5 weeks I think I was equal parts overwhelmed, excited to see people and use my brain again. Now, at the start of my third full week I am so freaking over it. Every little thing I didn’t love about my job pre-baby is on blast. I feel like I’m so emotional and in my head (which is atypical of me) and I don’t even know what emotions or thoughts of mine to trust and which to dismiss as being a mere function of this nutty point in time in my life.

    I don’t even long to be on mat leave again. I miss DD, yes. But, changing diapers and doing that whole song and dance all day isn’t even what I wish to be doing. I just want to be anywhere but in my office, in this job.

    • Anonymous says

      I feel ya. My daughter is 7 months and I’ve been back for 3 months and I feel like it’s gotten harder not easier. She’s home with her dad so I know she’s well-cared for and I do miss her but it’s not like I’m sitting in my office crying about it. And I didn’t especially enjoy mat leave. But I just feel so emotionally and mentally checked out. I’m having a hard time doing any work and what little I’m doing isn’t up to my pre-baby quality. I liked my job before baby but now I’m just really struggling and living weekend to weekend. I’m thinking seriously about leaving to stay home when my husbands paternity leave is up.

    • CPA Lady says

      I think your priorities can change after having kids. And what level of bull$h*% you’re willing to put up with. I switched jobs for a variety of reasons when my kid was about 15 months old. I came back from maternity leave when she was 12 weeks old. I was happy to be working, and I loved many things about that job, but it was not a sustainable situation.

      I’d say give it a solid 6 months-year, but if you’re not feeling it, then find something else.

    • Knope says

      Are you still waking up at night to feed the baby? I was really not myself – super emotional, on edge, forgetful, etc. – until I started getting 6 hrs of consecutive sleep again.

      • ifiknew says

        +1. I went back to work after my first DD at 16 weeks of leave and I was such a mess. I held it together at work, but just in such a fog and it was so so hard (especially as I was pumping 2x at work, and getting up at night 2-3x to nurse). I ended up switching jobs with a pretty regular 35-40 hour schedule when baby was 9 months old and it’s been much better and after the baby turned 1 and I quit nursing / pumping, life is so much easier.

        I still have moments where I want to quit and stay home, but when I started tracking it daily, it was a month of no’s, with a few days where I found work stressful and annoying and wanted to stay home. The older the bay gets, the more I think okay, maybe I don’t need to quit completely..

        I still have dreams of part-time though.. just not common in my field.

  15. Anonymous says

    It has been A Day. My 6 month old is normally a great sleeper, but has had a huge developmental leap this past week and decided to stay up until 1 am last night practicing all her new skills – and of course she still woke up at 7 am as normal. My supply has dropped a lot in the last few weeks and she mostly gets formula while I’m at work now, which I know isn’t a big deal, but I’m still sad about it. Today I had my worst pumping session yet – barely 3 oz from both sides. And then when I was done I noticed what I’m pretty sure is mold on one of the connectors so I guess I need to toss what little milk I pumped today. She’s supposed to start daycare this fall but we still don’t know if one of the handful of licensed daycares in our area will have a spot for her, so I’ve been emailing and interviewing what feels like a zillion potential nannies. I need a weekend and it’s only Monday.

    • AIMS says

      That sounds like a lot! I hope your week gets better. I had one of these recently too. It started with a bird pooping on my head on my way to work and then at some point my pump bottle literally fell off the pump and just landed on the floor with a thud. I try to think of this sort of thing as all the bad luck just getting out at once. Hang in there! You’re doing great!!!

ABOUT

WORK WITH US

SERIOUS STUFF