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Save or Splurge Thursday: Dramatically Different Moisturizer

Recent Recs

Is this a save or a splurge? Sure you can get moisturizer for far less, and moisturizer for far more. For me, this was my first splurge — when I was in high school, I bought this on my first trip to a department store makeup counter with money from my after-school job. It felt so indulgent to walk away with my very own bottle in a crisp shopping bag.

To this day, I’ve tried lots of different moisturizers, but I always return to Clinique’s. My skin is pretty “normal”: drier in the winter, a little oilier in the summer. I change my facewash and other skincare with the seasons, but I can pretty much use this moisturizer year-round.

It is $29.50 at Nordstrom and Sephora (which has additional sizes). For those with oil-prone skin, there is also a gel version. Dramatically Different Moisturizer

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Sales of Note…

(See all of the latest workwear sales at Corporette!)

Kid/Family Sales

  • J.Crew – Up to 50% off kids’ camp styles; extra 50% off select sale
  • Lands’ End – 30% off full-price styles
  • Hanna Andersson – Up to 50% off summer pajamas; up to 50% off all baby styles (semi-annual baby event!)
  • Carter’s – Summer deals from $5; up to 60% off swim
  • Old Navy – 30% off your order; kid/toddler/baby tees $4
  • Target – Kids’ swim from $8; summer accessories from $10

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About Ann

Ann is a working mom, a longtime reader of Corporette and CorporetteMoms, and has been writing our morning fashion advice for working moms since November 2020! She has a daughter (born winter 2014) and a son (born fall 2019) and is a public interest lawyer in Washington, D.C.

Comments

  1. Bellyaches says

    My ten-month-old wakes up regularly at night, sometimes in two-hour windows and sometimes a little longer, with what seems to be gas pains. She cries and sits up in the crib until I pick her up and nurse; then she fusses until she passes gas a time or two, then goes back to sleep. There’s sometimes more gas when she lies back down in the crib. We’ve started giving her a dose of gas drops before bed, but that doesn’t seem to be doing much, and it doesn’t seem to be tied to any particular food. She’s a good eater and has yogurt almost every day, FWIW. And I don’t see this any more on the days when she has gassy foods (beans, broccoli) than when she doesn’t.

    Any advice? More gas drops during the day? Ask the pediatrician for a probiotic (or should I just order one)? I really feel like we could make some progress on sleep if we got this figured out. TIA, truly.

    • Anon says

      You can try a probiotic but my gut says (because of the regularity and timing of wake ups) this is a sleep issue, not a gas issue. I would work on sleep issues now with whatever plan you want to use, and see if the gas issues dissapear.

    • Anonymous says

      I would try keeping a careful food diary for two weeks – note everything she eats and how she was at night (even if a good night as that will help know what is okay. One of my twins LOVED green peas but they gave him horrible gas pains. He was fine with basically all other veggies. For my oldest, it was quinoa that triggered gas. When they eat a food can matter as well. It took me a while to figure out the green peas because he was okay if he ate them at lunch – I think all the running around after lunch helped them move through without as much bother, it was only if he had them at dinner time that it was triggering.

    • Anonymous says

      I would def talk to the doctor. For mine this was a dairy sensitivity.

    • anon says

      Try Gerber Soothe drops if you want to go that route. But IME, unfortunately, if the baby is mysteriously gassy and you can’t figure out why, nothing but time will fix it (for me, it was around the one-year mark, sorry).

    • strollerstrike says

      Not sure if they also work for older children but we had occasianal success with the windy from the people that make the noise frida. We only used it on my son when he was younger though. Maybe try it before you first put her down?

    • Anon says

      I always thought my daughter had gas pains and then she would pop a new tooth or master a new developmental skill. 10 months is prime age for both teething and working on skills like crawling, standing up and walking that are disruptive to sleep. Farting after nursing is pretty common, it doesn’t really suggest gas pain to me, and nursing can be the solution to a multitude of problems (hunger, thirst, teeth pain, just wanting comfort from mom, etc.) If you were seeing this linked to a specific food, I would agree it might be digestive problems, but the fact that this is an every day problem suggests to me the cause is not food.
      That said, I’m a huge fan of probiotics for kids (for everyone really) and I think that’s definitely worth a try. Personally I would also try Tylenol before bed in case it’s teething, but I know other people are more cautious about using Tylenol prophylactically.

  2. anonamama says

    Lotion recs for baby/toddler (13 mos) with seasonal dry skin? I’ve tried Tubby Todd & CeraVe Baby and still no luck.

    • Anon says

      Could it be mild eczema? Both of mine get rough patches in the colder months (and one gets rough, red cheeks) and we’ve been told it’s eczema. We cover them in Aquaphor at night

      • Anon says

        Yes check for eczema. Mine both had rough patches in the dry months so we would use the Aveeno Baby Eczema lotion from Nov til Mar almost until preschool. It wouldn’t completely eliminate the patches but would keep them from getting red and itchy.

        • poiu says

          +1 We use Aveeno Baby Eczema. When we initially talked to the pediatrician she suggested using hydrocortisone on bad areas (our kid was over 2, though, so I don’t know if it’s advised 13 month olds). Dr. also prescribed something stronger but we didn’t end up needing to use it.

      • katy says

        +10 to Aquaphor on the really patchy bits, including face.

        Other things we have tried:
        – As a baby we also sometimes used a very mild cortisone cream on eczema.
        – for hands i sometime slather on Vaseline at storytime and then cover his hands with socks. 30 mins later can take off socks.

    • AnotherAnon says

      What worked best for my kiddo at that age was bathing very infrequently (like once per week). I also like Honest Face & Body lotion in Truly Calming (it’s lavender; they also have unscented).

    • Anonymous says

      Aveeno Eczema works really well as a body lotion. Aquaphor on the hands and other problem patches.

      • blueridge29 says

        plus 1 for Aquaphor on problem patches. I reapply on hands when kiddo is asleep b/c he is a heavy sleeper.

      • NYCer says

        My daughter doesn’t have particularly dry skin, but this is what we use too.

    • Anon says

      My nephew has terrible excema and they turned us on to Vanicream, which I love.

    • Anon says

      We use vanicream. Put hydrocortisone one any eczema flare ups (if applicable) and then vanicream all over.

    • So Anon says

      Agree that this may be eczema. My kids and I all have eczema. I highly recommend aquaphor. We avoid lotion because even the mildest lotion tends to have alcohol in it to help it dry, and that can irritate sensitive skin.

    • Anonymous says

      We use Aveeno Baby but not a specific formula for eczema. My DD has eczema and cold, dry weather is a trigger. When she actually has a flare-up, the only thing that makes it go away is time or a steroid cream that our doctor prescribed. But using a moisturizing lotion every seems to prevent flare-ups for the most part. It does have alcohol in it, but doesn’t seem to bother her skin (or mine, which is also sensitive). We also run a humidifier in her room at night so she’s only around the super dry air at school.

  3. Toddler Crib Conversion says

    Are the toddler crib conversion kits really necessary? We have the Larkin crib from PB and were thinking of ordering the toddler rail before they stop making the crib, but do we need it? The back of the crib can be used as a headboard which we would ideally use it as his full size big kid bed one day. Is it too much to jump from crib to full at once?

    • Cb says

      We went from a crib to a single bed (IKEA Hemnes, so quite high off the ground). We put the generic bed guard on it and while it’s not the prettiest thing, it’s fine. I wouldn’t want to sacrifice the floor space for a full size bed for a toddler though? Like, you could build a much bigger train layout in that space.

    • Anon says

      I think it’s fine to jump from crib to full bed, but if you want to use the back of the crib as the headboard you still need a conversion kit. You can toss the crib completely and buy a full size bed if you don’t want to use the conversion kit.

        • Anon says

          Yes it’s different than the toddler bed kit, but you still need to order a conversion kit.

      • OP says

        With this particular crib, you can use that back piece as a headboard to one of those basic metal frames you can buy anywhere. If we chose to get the footboard and wooden side rails, we would need the full size conversion as well.

    • Anonymous says

      A toddler bed is not necessary unless you are in a limited-space situation and don’t have room for a real bed. We went straight from the crib to a twin and it was fine. A full-sized bed would be even easier, as the likelihood of falling out would be less. You can also put the full-sized mattress on the floor for a while.

    • Anne says

      I think it’s easier to go from crib to full with a bumper in place. Why do a middle step?

      • Anon says

        I like a toddler bed because it’s much smaller and leaves a lot more of the room available for play. I’m sure a regular bed would be fine, but I don’t think the transition will be difficult when we eventually do it, and I see no reason to rush into it while my kid is still happy in the toddler bed.

        • Spirograph says

          ^ This. We kept the toddler bed conversion for a long time, and even bought a second (cheap) toddler bed because our kids are pretty close in age and we needed the crib to be a crib again. It fit much better in the shared bedroom while still leaving space to store toys and play.

          None of my kids had any problem transitioning from crib to toddler bed to bigger bed, though. The older ones stayed in a toddler bed probably til 4.5 — they were too big, but they liked being cozy. The youngest was in a twin bed before 3, once we bought a bunk bed.

    • anon says

      We went crib -> crib with a side removed (aka toddler bed w/out a rail) -> twin bed.

      If your crib is stable with 3 sides, I see no reason to buy the toddler bed kit, and it was also nice to have the kids learn not to fall out of bed at a young age since then we could have them sleep wherever when traveling. We also liked having the floor space saved by keeping the crib footprint until our kids got too tall (around 4).

      • Anonymous says

        +1 to checking to see if it is stable without the side – I think the conversion rail may play a structural role. Another very cheap option would be just to put the mattress on the floor. IKEA toddler beds are also super cheap new and widely available used if you decide you want one and can’t convert your crib. My son slept in his converted crib until he was um, 6, because we are cheap and lazy and he still fit and we don’t have a lot of room. Then one day we returned from vacation and he asked, why is my bed so hard?? (He still had the board-like infant mattress).

    • Anon says

      Our crib came with a conversion rail thankfully, so when DD climbed out at 17 months, we were able to convert it the next night rather than encourage our aspiring cirque de solei performer. That being said, we went from the toddler bed to a queen (what we had) at 2.5 and she was totally fine, so I think it likely depends on how old your kid is when you make the jump.

    • Anonymous says

      Maybe it depends how old baby is when you move to a bed. At 3 we moved straight to a regular bed with no rail, just shoved a pillow under the sheet at the edge of the bed for a couple months.

  4. Cb says

    Toddler board game rec – someone bought us Shopping List by Orchard Toys and my 3.5 year old really seems to get/like it. We don’t count the money properly, just tell him how many coins, but he gets the principle of the game.

  5. anon says

    I use the gel version of this moisturizer; the + doesn’t agree with my skin. I don’t know whether it’s a save or splurge, but I have tried others and always come back to this one for my daytime regime. Recently I upgraded to one of the Dramatically Different moisturizers plus the cartridge for specialized treatment, and I like that version even better. I use the green one for irritation. I was skeptical, but it has made a difference! It’s $39 instead of $29, though.

    I’m not sure why Clinique doesn’t get more love in beauty circles. I guess it’s not trendy enough? I have super sensitive, reactive skin, and Clinique is one of those brands that just works and doesn’t make my skin hate me more than it already does. I skip their foundation — have never found one that I love — but I like many of their eye and lip products.

  6. Anon says

    for those of you who’ve switched your kids or considered switching your kid from more of a daycare setting to more of a preschool setting – what made you decide to switch your kid or if you thought about it and decided not to – why?

    • Anonymous says

      We switched from a play-based day care/preschool to a chain “preschool” when it came time for Pre-K. The play-based center transitioned to a worksheet-based format in pre-K and it was just so boring for a kid who’d already been reading for over a year to spend all her time tracing the letter of the day. The chain was even more drill-and-kill, but we were able to put her in private K instead of pre-K and punch her ticket for first grade. It was the lesser of two evils.

    • Anon says

      We moved our kids from daycare to preschool with before/after care (aka some kids just came from 9-noon for preschool, but most where there the full 7:30-6:00) the September they were 2 for two reasons. The first was just purely logistics: we’re a single car family and preschool was a 15 minute walk from home whereas daycare was 30 minutes. Preschool was also cheaper. The second was that our daycare had one room for kids 18 months and up and while this seemed great for ages 1.5-3.5ish, we were worried about them getting bored when they got older. Given the way preschool enrollment works in my area, it was much easier to move our kids into a 2yo preschool class (and then have them stay there until kindergarten) than try to find spaces in a 4yo class when they actually aged out of their old daycare.

    • Anon says

      I’ll be honest, I don’t understand what the difference is or why a preschool would be inherently superior, unless you’re seeking out something very specific like language immersion or a school with intense academics that gets kids reading at a very young age. I’ve heard a few explanations thrown out for what the distinction is (like preschool is part-time vs daycare is full or preschool teachers have more education than daycare teachers) but those “rules” don’t seem universal or even terribly important (I don’t think someone needs a master’s degree to teach a 3 year old letters and social skills). In my area, the best early childhood education programs are all daycares, and we will use our beloved daycare until our kids go to kindergarten.

      • Anon says

        I agree. My daycare has a curriculum and great learning activities. I don’t see why a preschool would be any better. I think the stereotype of preschools being superior may be linked to the same cliches about it being better for kids to be raised by a stay at home mom and only put into part-time programs purely for the education and not for childcare reasons, and daycares being viewed as overly institutional options for people who have to work.

        • Anon says

          YES!!! I 1000% think the stereotypes are wrapped up in negative perceptions of “daycare” as chaotic places that evil working moms abandon their poor innocent babies, whereas “preschool” is a wonderful place for the adored children of loving SAHMs to have a little fun with their peers before returning home to Mommy for an organic, veggie-filled lunch and a long nap in a perfectly quiet, dark room.

      • Anne says

        This. We actually moved from preschool to daycare due to COVID and I LOVE how much more time for play there is at daycare.

      • Anon says

        Adding that I don’t even really think official “preschool” would be an option for us even if we wanted to switch. I didn’t know of any secular preschools in our area off the top of my head and I just googled and confirmed that all the preschools that aren’t daycares in our city are run by churches, which is a non-starter for us as Jewish atheists. So I guess it’s a good thing we’re very happy with our play-based daycare/preschool!

        • anonn says

          our daughter goes to a church preschool and I’m pretty disappointed at how secular it is (we are Christian). Though, I guess I don’t have to worry about them teaching bad theology. Some teachers have them sing a blessing before lunch, but that’s the extent of it. We have athiest friends who send their kids there. They also do Christmas activities, but those are all secular too, IMO. So, you might look beyond just who is running it. It’s a money-maker for the church that had the space.

          • Anon says

            Speaking as a culturally Jewish person, it’s impossible for Christmas to be secular. I understand that there might be more of a focus on trees and Santa than Jesus, but it’s still a Christian holiday that is not part of any other organized religion. Secular means no religion, not watered down religion.

            Anyway, I’m not looking to switch, we completely adore our daycare. Just pointing out that in some places, secular preschools (separate from daycares) don’t even exist. I’m also skeptical that church preschools would have a more academic focus or a more educated staff than large daycare centers, which seem to be common justifications for doing the daycare to preschool switch (to be clear, I don’t think these things are necessary or important, but some people seem to).

          • rosie says

            I get that the preschool isn’t as religious as you would like, but saying a blessing & doing Christian holidays — which Christmas most definitely is — are not secular activities.

          • Anonymous says

            Yes, these schools are frequently just a money-maker for the church. I’m sure they wouldn’t lease space to an avowed satanist, but otherwise they’re not really involved in curriculum in my experience. Of course, even if the preschool itself is secular, you still would see Christian imagery around the building, and I totally understand why that might bother people of a different religion.

            Our kids went to a nonprofit preschool in a church and aside from them not being able to have Halloween celebrations or decorations because the preschool rooms were used for Sunday School and the church wouldn’t allow that heathen nonsense in their space, it had zero to do with theology. They recognized a whole bunch of winter holidays – Christmas, Hanukkah, Kwanzaa, & Diwali. The church we attend (which is not the one where the preschool was located) hosts a private school during the week that is not affiliated with the church, either, other than using their space.

            Interestingly, a few of my Christian church friends send their kids to a Jewish preschool.

          • Anonymous says

            Santa Claus and other Christmas traditions that some people call “secular” are culturally Christian, but not religious. My mother was a member of a weird fundamentalist church that considered it a sin to celebrate Christmas as a religious holiday because you are supposed to celebrate Christ’s death and resurrection, not his birth. We still had Santa Claus and a Christmas tree at home, but we didn’t sing religious carols or have a nativity set or an angel on top of the tree or read the Christmas story from the Bible.

        • Anonanonanon says

          I’m Quaker so theoretically we should not celebrate christmas (the idea boils down to every day should be holy not just one random day in December) but we do Christmas and Easter as the culturally-christian seasonal holidays they are. However, I would never day they’re secular.

          Also, an argument against church preschool… they are usually exempt from a lot of licensing regulations. I learned that after US marshalls arrested the director of one my son was in :)

          • Anonymous says

            My cousin is not Quaker but sent her kids to a Quaker school (Pre-K to 12) and raved it about it!

      • CCLA says

        Agree with this for daycare centers – most centers in our area seem to basically be full day preschools starting around age 3. Our kids are in one such center and will be there until they go to kindergarten; we adore it. However, earlier our oldest spent a year from about age 1.5-2.5 at a larger in-home daycare (a dozen kids, with 3 caregivers) and I would not have kept her there past age 3 or so even if we hadn’t moved away. She was lovingly cared for, but it was primarily infants and toddlers even though technically open through age 5 and she would have been bored out of her mind hanging with the babies all day. She didn’t need a curriculum but I did think she would benefit from spending her days with more kids her age.

      • Anonymous says

        This will really vary by daycare. Large chains like Bright Horizons typically have a traditional preschool “curriculum.” I’ve been to home daycare that are really just childcare from ages infant–>5. So I bet your daycare and a preschool are entirely interchangeable.

        Around here, “preschool” means “the school your 3-4 year old goes to” which can be a stand-alone program that serves kids of a preschool age or it can be part of a larger program.

        • Anon says

          Very true, I was thinking only of daycare centers when I said I didn’t understand the daycare vs preschool distinction but I should have been more specific because not all daycares are daycare centers. I agree that most in-home daycares are very different than preschool, even if the caregivers are wonderful.

    • Anonymous says

      We switched for two reasons, in order of importance: (1) kiddo is an October birthday. Her daycare always put her a grade up, but they combine 4s and 5s. So she would have gone through their 4/5 year old program twice. We felt she’d already gotten out of it what she was going to get, and nearly all of her friends were old enough to move to kindergarten. We didn’t want her to feel left behind. (2) is is public pre-K, so there is no cost. And with the pandemic, we’re not doing aftercare. The hours aren’t as good as daycare, but with the no-cost tradeoff, it works out.

      The quality of the education is superior, but our town has a truly exceptional pre-K program. Which I am realizing more and more as she is in it this year, so it wasn’t a big part of the initial decision.

    • Anonymous says

      Due in part to the advent of universal pre-K (we’re in NYC), older kids stopped going to our daycare, so there were very few other 3 year olds there. Families that knew they were going to leave for UPK at 4 would go ahead and switch at 3. Our daycare was a small, in-home-like place, so kids weren’t really segregated by age. Thus the staff were limited in what they could do with the older kids, whereas preschool took field trips, had more interesting toys, etc. My son was doing a mix of both at 3 and definitely preferred his preschool. If you have a daycare that has age segregation I think there is probably minimal difference. Our preschool also had teachers that had early childhood degrees, while our daycare did not.

    • Anon says

      I think public Pre-K is quite different, I don’t live in an area that has that but I can see the value in it, particularly if the same pool of classmates will be in the child’s kindergarten class and the curriculum is specifically designed to prepare the kids for public K. Plus of course it can be a huge financial savings, even if you have to pay for aftercare.

      But for private centers, the only people I knew who left daycare and put their kids in preschool were people who are incredibly intense about academics and wanted a preschool that was going to be drilling letters and numbers all day and getting their kids reading by age 3 or 4. Our daycare is completely play-based, no worksheets even in the pre-K room, which I’m a huge fan of. They do some academic stuff of course, moreso as the kids get older, but it’s integrated into play. For example, in my daughter’s 2s and 3s room, they are learning letters because they will call them to do various things by showing them the letter their name starts with. But there’s no “let’s sit down and memorize letters” at all. I happen to think that’s a good thing, but I have friends who are horrified my almost 3 year old doesn’t know all her letters, so I think it really just depends on your family’s priorities and what you’re hoping to get out of school at this age. We have some family members who are child development experts and they all stress that kids should be in a play-based environment as long as possible and there’s no need to rush reading or other academic skills. The parents I’ve talked to at our daycare say the kids are overprepared for public K, so I’m not worried about the lack of academic focus at all and I think it’s much more important for 3 and 4 year olds to be learning social and developmental skills than academic skills (especially for our family, where academics tend to come naturally and social skills don’t).

      • Anonymous says

        I am the commenter above who put her kid in private K and agree with all of this. Academic preschool is completely unnecessary if you’re reading to them at home and they are working on fine motor and social skills in day care.

        • Anon says

          Maybe it’s more like drilling skills that are necessary for reading, like letter sounds. It’s still pretty crazy to me.

    • Anonymous says

      The only differences between “preschool” and day care are usually the potty training requirement (preschools not licensed as day care centers won’t change diapers) and the length of the school day. I have never heard of a day care that did not schedule its day like a preschool with extended care in the mornings and afternoons. I think “preschool” without extended care is often a status symbol–look, we are rich enough to afford expensive tuition plus a full-time nanny or SAHM! And we are rich and cool enough to pass the admissions interview!

      • Anonymous says

        This. It’s a status symbol to not need full-time group childcare. Anecdotally, I’ve heard really bad things about preschool aftercare from a number of people, so if you need full-time care, a daycare center that’s designed to provide full-time care may be a better choice. A lot of preschools seem to have the attitude that the official school day is what’s supposed to be educational and developmentally optimal, and the aftercare doesn’t matter (I think there’s definitely more than a touch of judgment there to working moms and families that can’t afford nannies). Of course at daycare, it’s all one “day” so there’s no distinction between teachers who send their kids 9-3 and lawyers who send their kids 6-6.

    • Anonymous says

      A copy and paste from my response late yesterday.

      1. The daycare our kids go/went to is technically infant-PK but the younger years are definitely where they shine. It’s not like kids that go to the PK are done a disservice-it’s totally fine.
      2. Our daycare is small and the PK age kids are often combined. So you have groups of 3/4/5 y/os and it’s the same kids since they were infants vs a more “classroom” environment where kids arrive at the same time and stay with the same group all day.
      3. I work from home and live very close to both daycare and preschool- multiple dropoffs is annoying but really only adds 10 min.
      4. Our preschool had a 2.9 program and my oldest was a fall birthday who missed the cutoff but was ready for PK. She did 3 full years in preschool
      5. The preschool we chose is very large and we were able to meet lots of kids/families from town. Our daycare was 25 families to total and about half were people that worked but did not live in town.

      There are TONS of schools that do daycare and preschool well. We just weren’t at one. There is a bright horizons in our town and I would say the mechanics are great there- kids come out well prepared for kindergarten. However the class that just “graduated” into K this year had a total of 9 kids and they all went to different elem schools. In contrast, my K-er has about 10 kids go to her school that were in PK with her (either in her class or the aftercare). So meeting other families prior to K was a big focus of ours, and moving schools achieved that in a way staying at daycare would not.

      • OP says

        thank you! sorry i missed your reply yesterday. that makes total sense. was also hoping to meet other families prior to K, but since parents won’t be allowed inside classrooms anytime soon, that probably won’t be happening

  7. anon says

    Arg, I am so frustrated with myself. Somehow, I have managed to misplace all the teachers’ gifts and stocking stuffers that I’ve already purchased. They are somewhere in my house, but I have checked my top 4 hiding spots and they aren’t there! Does anyone else do this to themselves? (This seems to happen whenever I shop early. We also have a bunch of November/December birthdays to buy for, which makes it even easier to lose track of things!)

    • Anon says

      ME! I’m missing at least one gift for my husband and a present I got my sister in September. Oops. I feel your pain right now! This is the one time of year I wish we had a bigger house so I could have a dedicated gifts spot!

    • Spirograph says

      Hahaha, me! I definitely found things that were supposed to be Christmas gifts this past February, I’d totally forgotten that I bought them early. I also hide other things too well, like the TV remote and video game controllers.

      My house looks like an Amazon shipping center right now because I haven’t had time to open anything that’s been delivered this week. I think the gifts are probably safest that way; the kids are strictly forbidden to open delivery boxes until January after they ripped open what were supposed to be stocking stuffers on Sunday, and they are getting less scared of the back of the basement where we used to be able to hide things.

      • Anonymous says

        I have most definitely found xmas gifts well into the new year…. ooops. Usually things like ornaments or stocking stuffers that i picked up at a market / craft fair etc. months in advance.

  8. Upper West Side says

    Need some help – my sister lives in upper west side in NYC – she broke her wrist last weekend. Was looking to send her something from a local shop to her home. Any recommendations? Thinking some comfort food etc.

  9. Ear Piercing says

    To yesterday’s thread about ear piercing. Just saw a blogger post about a company that sells earrings + piercing services in select areas for in-home and at Target. Hey Rowan dot com.

  10. Anon says

    sort of related to the above post about daycare/preschool – how important do you think it is for a kid to be in a program where the day is about as long as the day in kindergarten before starting kindergarten? like if my kid does an 8:30-12:30 program for pre-k, but then K is 7:30-2:50, will my kid be unprepared? we have a nanny who we LOVE and has been a lifesaver, but if we do a pre-k program from 9-2, it is harder for me to justify keeping our beloved nanny.

    • Anonymous says

      Keep the nanny. The extra hour in the 9-2 program vs the 8:30-12:30 program will not make a difference. Nanny is key if kid gets sick etc. If they haven’t been in formal childcare/education before then you’re likely to see about a cold a month for the first winter.

    • anonn says

      no experience here, but I’d guess like all transitions with kids there would be a few day/week adjustment period and then they’d be fine. I think K wears out even full time day care kids at first. That’s what I’ve heard from parents at my daycare with older kids.

    • Spirograph says

      Not important.
      My kids were in full time daycare/preschool 8:30-5:30ish, and my son was still completely spent after a day of kindergarten + aftercare for the exact same amount of time. My daughter didn’t have as rough of a transition coming out of pandemic summer into a Montessori K, which is either pandemic difference (eg so excited just to be back in a classroom with other kids!), personality difference, public K vs Montessori difference, or the fact that there’s no after care at Montessori so the day isn’t as long as she’d previously spent in preschool.

      In any case, I don’t think you can build up tolerance in a meaningful way, and wouldn’t make this part of your decision-making.

    • Anon says

      I live in an area with a lot of SAHMs, but here it’s very common to do morning-only preschool and the kids seem to have no problem with the transition to public K. If you’re willing to keep the nanny another year, half day kindergarten could also be an option. Either way, at some point there will be a half day to full day transition and your kid will adjust.

    • anon says

      I wouldn’t worry about it.

      My kid was in daycare/preschool that covered standard working hours from 6 months old and was totally exhausted at the end of the day his first months of kindergarten. I heard the same from similar families.

      Kindergarten is really different from preschool and that’s tiring for many children.

    • Anon says

      Not important. Kids mature so much in a year that they will be much more capable of handling a longer day without “preparation”.

      My kid went from doing nothing (home with me) to going to full-time public preK at age 4 (five days a week, 8:30-4 with the bus time). It was admittedly a lot and he was tired at the end of the days/week, but he handled it great and enjoyed school.

      And now here we are in remote K, where he’s been in the classroom a whole 10 days all semester… but the days he’s been there full-time I can tell he’s less exhausted than he was at 4.

    • Lyssa says

      Both of mine went to half day pre-K (and then home to a stay at home dad) and took to Kindergarten just fine. I don’t think it makes a bit of difference. They don’t have a really great sense of time differences at this age.

  11. Anon for this says

    Any thoughts on ways to support someone whose entire household is very sick with covid? No one hospitalized so far thankfully, but the situation is concerning to say the least. They aren’t local which makes it harder.

    • Redux says

      Food. Meals that are ready to eat, either take out or grocery delivery. People I know who have had it say they can barely get off the couch to make themselves a bowl of pasta or cereal a couple times a day and not much else. Depending on how old the kids are, healthy snacks that require no prep, and microwaveable meals or meal delivery would be helpful. Plus lots of screentime– give them your tv/movie subscription logins if you have something they don’t.

      I also sent my friend new sweatpants because she had been wearing the same pair for days and had no energy to do laundry.

    • Anon says

      Ask them how you can help! If you don’t want to/can’t do that, order them some meal delivery from a local restaurant. The delivery service should be able to just leave the food on the porch and text them to let them know it’s there.

  12. anon says

    My 5 year old is kinda obsessed with a friend in her class. They are in PreK4 together and were also in PreK3 last year together. She talks about this other girl all the time at home, plays with her every day in school, and seems to think about her a lot–what she likes, what she does, what she wears, etc. My daughter is pretty good in social situations, she is very verbal and seems to get along well with other children, her teachers love her, and she can be very charming, but for some reason she seems fixated on this other girl. For example, we did an outdoor playdate with a few kids from her class and my daughter was very distracted and almost distraught until the other girl showed up. She repeatedly asked where she was and why she wasn’t there yet, even though the other kids were playing with her. I don’t think I’m worried about this, but I’m not sure. It does seem kind of weird, but I don’t want to borrow trouble. Have others seen this happen with their kids? Do they eventually grow out of it? I’m mostly worried about next year when they will likely go to different kindergartens. Also, the other girl is totally fine and normal, and seems to like my kid, too, but not to the degree that my daughter likes her.

    • ElisaR says

      sounds fairly typical. my niece had the same experience. i think it’s nice…. the object of her affection can just bask in it for now and they will move on when in different kindergartens.

    • Anon says

      I remember being fixated on another girl in kindergarten – I thought she was pretty and wanted to look like her. It wasn’t to the point of getting distraught, but I wanted to be friends with her and always tried to invite her over even though she barely paid any attention to me. As it happened, my family moved away and I forgot all about her except when I hear about similar behavior.

    • Anon says

      My son was like this in preK 4. He kept talking about his “best friend”, but I think came on kind of strong – the other kid was not so nice to him. He was happily oblivious, though, so I let it go and now they are in different classes and buses and my son never talks about him anymore.

      I think it’s part of growing in independence and the thrill of making their own friends away from their parents. I wouldn’t worry, but maybe try to facilitate play dates or conversations not involving this girl, too.

    • Anonymous says

      I think it’s pretty normal, but I definitely think it’s good be proactive about encouraging your children to seek out other friends and explaining why focusing too much on one friend can harm the friendship. I would probably even be open with your kid that this child likely won’t be in her kindergarten class and explain that it’s important to broaden her social circle a little so she knows some of the other kids when she starts kindergarten. I’m an only child and I was very intense about friendships as a kid (still am as an adult, truthfully) and definitely had some heartbreaking friendship break-ups in early elementary when my feelings were too strong for the other kid. I blame my parents though, they were great parents in general but they kind of took the “you’re so amazing, there must be something wrong with that other kid if she doesn’t want to play with you every day” approach, which I now see as an adult didn’t do me any favors (and ultimately didn’t even protect my feelings when the other kid ultimately ended the friendship). But it doesn’t sound like you’re doing that at all, so I wouldn’t worry too much about it.

    • Redux says

      Uh oh. Sounds like a real Jennifer Jason Leigh situation.

      Just kidding! As the commenters above, I think this is normal, too. My kid had a Very Best Friend in preK whom she preferred over all the other kids. She was pretty sad to leave her in Kindergarten and we worked through her emotions around that, including planning weekend play dates. She made friends easily in K despite missing prek Very Best Friend. This year, preK Very Best Friend moved out of state. It’s been a year and a half since they were last in prek together and when asked, my kid still says prek Very Best Friend is her best friend. They FaceTime very occasionally and now that they are learning to write, they write letters. It’s pretty cute. I wouldn’t worry about this unless it is legitimately interfering with her life. Being distressed while waiting for her to show up for a playdate is normal, I’d say, especially for a 4-year old.

  13. Anon says

    Any tips for a really long (~13 hours) road trip with an almost 3 year old? We’re hoping to only stop twice for fast food, gas and bathroom breaks for adults (kiddo is still in diapers). We purchased her a tablet and generally she does pretty well on long car rides but we’ve never done anything anywhere near this long.

    • Anonymous says

      Twice seems unrealistic. That’s 6.5 hours between bathroom breaks which seems like a lot even for adults. If she pees in her diaper, she won’t want to be in it for like 4 hours. The only way I can see that working is if you leave in the evening and she sleeps in her carseat. Mine didn’t sleep long stretches in their carseats at that age because it was too upright. 3 stops might be doable but I wouldn’t be surprised if you need 4.

      • Anon says

        I think you’re doing the math wrong. Two stops on a 13 hour drive translates to ~4-4.5 hours between stops. That’s completely doable for me and DH, and for better or worse, kiddo is not bothered by pee diapers especially if we put her in an overnight diaper, which we will. We did a six hour drive this summer and actually did not stop at all, but I agree that trying to do two six+ hour stretches back to back (i.e., one stop) would likely be too much.

    • Anonymous says

      I would find a park you can stop at to run around when you have one of your meals, and plan to stop every 2 hours or so for bathroom breaks and leg stretching.

      • CCLA says

        Yeah I’d plan to stop every 2-3 hours or so. At 3 my kid would complain about her legs hurting from being in the carseat after 2-3 hours – and I get it! My legs get uncomfortable after a few hours in the car. Doesn’t need to be a long stop, just let everyone stretch their legs for 5-10 minutes in a parking lot or rest stop. Headphones for her tablet if you don’t want to hear the sound from her shows.

      • Anonymous says

        My advice is the complete opposite, ha! My daughter is fine in the car but the second we let her out to run around she thinks the trip is over and she would have a complete meltdown if we tried to make her get back in and keep driving after letting her play in a park. We take the long haul trucking approach and try to stop as little as possible, and when we do stop we don’t leave the car except for essentials. Also, be warned that if a drive is 13 hours on Google maps and you stop every 2 hours, especially if you’re playing outside at every stop, the total trip will end up taking probably 16-17 hours or more! That’s way more driving than I (and most people, I think) could safely do in one day. I would much rather just power through and get it over with and keep the total trip time closer to 13 hours, but to each their own.

        • anon says

          +1 we did 19 hours with our kids this summer (but stopped overnight) and the less stops the better! We did do a long lunch at a park where they could run around a bit. Kids were 1, 3 and 5. Would stop for bathroom needs obviously but I’d encourage pushing through where possible even in a non-covid world because stops are disruptive and take longer than you think they will.

          • Redux says

            Same, and I would also recommend old fashioned literal roadside stops over rest areas for simple bathroom breaks. Some may find this intolerable but we spent way more time at a rest stop bathroom break than on a side of the road bathroom break. The bathrooms have lines, or someone gets distracted by a food option, etc. When we literally stopped on the side of the road to pee in the potty (then toss the pee, wipe out the potty with a wet wipe, and go!) the stops were a fraction of the time.

    • Anon says

      We did a 10 hour drive with my then 2 year old pre pandemic. We left at o dark thirty so we were able to get 4.5 hours while she slept with the first stretch, but then had to stop twice more before getting to the destination because she was getting so antsy (as was DH, maybe it’s genetic). On the way home, we actually drove overnight and I think we had 2 stops to switch drivers, get food, etc. and she slept the whole way, but then we got home and had two exhausted adults and one well-rested kid. On the day drive, we would do a drive through for food and then liked stopping at rest stops so that she could run around outside for a bit while we took turns in the bathroom and ate at a picnic table (it was summer). Tablet, new toys to be dished out as needed (water wow, one of those LCD drawing tablet things, etc.), and all the snacks, preferably ones that need to be eaten slowly (goldfish in a snack catcher) vs. devoured in an instant (pouches).

    • octagon says

      We did 20 hours of driving over two days this summer. I think two stops sounds reasonable but plan ahead and see if you can scope out a park or someplace to run around, and plan for a 30-min or so break. Everyone will benefit from stretching their legs. See if you can do something to get kiddo’s heart rate up — race between parents, jump up and down 20 times, etc.

      For the tablet, definitely download things from different services if possible. Test your downloads before you set off to confirm they work in airplane mode. Make sure she’s comfortable in the headphones, can put them on by herself if needed. Our ipad sometimes would hiccup and have trouble replaying Netflix downloads until we reconnected to WiFi. Have an extra charging cable just in case. I also purchased some storybooks on Audible (Frozen was a huge hit) and downloaded some shorter audiobooks from our local library.

      I also had a bag of tricks at the ready with some fidget-type toys — a fidget cube, a koosh ball, and bunmo stretchy strings. Those really seemed to help provide activity to accompany watching videos. Finally, we hung a blanket over the passenger window by the car seat so we didn’t have to worry about sun in eyes – bonus that it cut down on glare for tablet-watching.

      • AnotherAnon says

        +1 to all this. We got the amazon tablet and disabled the wifi, but downloaded 30 Paw Patrols and Blippi episodes and he was satisfied for 18 hours of travel (over two days). Pack tons of snacks! If kiddo doesn’t want them, you and DH will.

        • Anon says

          Is there a way around the 25 download limit on the A-zon tablet? That’s what we have too but it’s telling me we can’t download anything more and when I looked it up online it said there’s a limit of 25 downloads. Unfortunately, everything my kiddo likes is very short, like 5 mins or less, so we don’t have many minutes of original screentime. Hopefully she’ll be ok re-watching some things though.

          • octagon says

            I never found a way to exceed the cap. You can look for “movie” versions of favorites to see if they have longer compilations — for example there are Daniel Tiger “movies” that are about an hour, but really they are just four segments from other shows strung together on a theme. Only counts as one download, though.

            We also use long car trips to get excited about new shows, and have 2-3 eps of something new at the ready.

          • AnotherAnon says

            Hm it must have been 25 episodes then. I’ll confess: it was actually DH’s idea to do the tablet for road trip so he bought it and configured it for the road trip. Honestly kiddo did complain at first that he couldn’t pick (he was used to me curating youtube videos for him), but once I explained how it worked and encouraged him to pick a video he’d already watched, he settled down. Not ideal, but sorry kiddo, it’s a road trip.

          • Anonymous says

            It’s 25 TV downloads (but I agree there are lots of combo eps like DT that are longer than a typical episode) but books are unlimited, and as a bonus they take up way less memory. My daughter’s favorite thing to do in the car is “read” (flip through and narrate) books, so we usually bring physical books too, but it’s always nice to have 100+ books saved on the tablet. The first time she looked at a book on her tablet she said “I’m reading like you, Mommy!” which I thought was just the cutest thing.

          • DLC says

            We once flew to Japan and my four year old watched the same two episodes of Doc McStuffins for the entire flight and laughed uproariously the whole time.

    • octagon says

      One more thing – have kids dramamine and plastic puke (grocery) bags at the ready, just in case. Watching something may increase motion sickness. Kiddo (5) does really well with a half-tab of dramamine every few hours to keep queasies at bay.

      • Anon says

        As a prolific puker myself (and mom to one), ziploc baggies are far superior to grocery bags because you can just seal them up and the rest of the car doesn’t have to continue smelling everything if you are not at a convenient place to stop. Also great for sealing up clothes if kiddo misses the bag. My kid started pretty reliably hitting one around 2 or 2.5. Now at 3.5 we’ve graduated to Zofran after kids dramamine did nothing, but even then we still have the occasional bag needed (poor thing).

    • Anonymous says

      If she does well on long rides, you’re probably fine with two stops! We did 11 hours over night at the beginning of the pandemic with an almost 4 year old, and although we had to stop twice for gas (and for one husband with an inexplicably small bladder to pee), he never got out of the car. We did the same drive coming back and stopped about every four hours, and it worked out fine. And that’s all with a potty trained kid, who somehow managed to not need the stops. Getting back in the car after a stop is definitely the worst part for us.

  14. Another Crib Question says

    DS is about 4.5 months and has started rolling over and sticks his legs through the slats in the side of the crib. Is this something I need to worry about? He hasn’t injured himself yet.

    • Anonymous says

      Nope. But if you’re worried about it, a sleep sack can solve this issue.

      • Anon Lawyer says

        Hah, unless you’re my weirdo baby who 100% still managed to get herself stuck. (Fortunately she mostly didn’t mind it and would usually just stay asleep with her sleep-sacked legs sticking out.)

    • Anonymous says

      It’s irritating and lasts for a few months. Once or twice our kids got stuck enough they were hurting but were easily rescued and not injured. One kid would back himself up until both legs were sticking out up to the hips. In our experience sadly sleep sacks did not solve the problem, but learning to crawl did.

    • Anon says

      Nah. It can be annoying if it wakes them up though. We do sleep sacks and they still manage to do this.

    • Realist says

      We used vertical crib liners. Expensive, but worth it. We had to order several sets to cover each crib slat, but they stopped the annoying habit of baby getting stuck in the crib and losing sleep.

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