This post may contain affiliate links and CorporetteMoms may earn commissions for purchases made through links in this post. As an Amazon Associate, I earn from qualifying purchases.
Happy Monday! Whether you’ve always had curly hair or your hair got curlier after pregnancy and/or as you’ve aged (as mine has), as summertime approaches it means more air-drying for a lot of us curlies — and I have to give a shoutout for this lovely CC cream for hair. It smells wonderful, leaves my curls soft but boingy, and has UV protection. (The full 10 list of things, from Sephora’s website: “It provides moisture, shine, smoothness, softness, anti-breakage, heat protection, light hold, UV protection, manageability, and strength—everything your hair needs to look absolutely beautiful, healthy, and flawless.”) It’s $12-$42, at Sephora. CAVIAR CC Cream for Hair 10-in-1 Complete Correction
This post contains affiliate links and CorporetteMoms may earn commissions for purchases made through links in this post. For more details see here. Thank you so much for your support!
Sales of note for 9.10.24
(See all of the latest workwear sales at Corporette!)
- Ann Taylor – 30% off your purchase
- Banana Republic Factory – Up to 50% off everything + extra 20% off
- Boden – 15% off new styles
- Eloquii – $29 and up select styles; up to 50% off everything else
- J.Crew – Up to 50% off wear-to-work styles; extra 30% off sale styles
- J.Crew Factory – 40-60% off everything; extra 60% off clearance
- Lands’ End – 30% off full-price styles
- Loft – Extra 40% off sale styles
- Talbots – BOGO 50% everything, includes markdowns
- Zappos – 26,000+ women’s sale items! (check out these reader-favorite workwear brands on sale, and some of our favorite kids’ shoe brands on sale)
Kid/Family Sales
- Carter’s – Birthday sale, 40-50% off & extra 20% off select styles
- Hanna Andersson – Up to 50% off all baby; up to 40% off all Halloween
- J.Crew Crewcuts – Extra 30% off sale styles
- Old Navy – 40% off everything
- Target – BOGO 25% off select haircare, up to 25% off floor care items; up to 30% off indoor furniture up to 20% off TVs
See some of our latest articles on CorporetteMoms:
Click here to see our top posts!
And — here are some of our latest threadjacks of interest – working mom questions asked by the commenters!
- The concept of “backup care” is so stupid…
- I need tips on managing employees in BigLaw who have to leave for daycare pickup…
- I’m thinking of leaning out to spend more time with my family – how can I find the perfect job for that?
- I’m now a SAHM and my husband needs to step up…
- How can I change my thinking to better recognize some of my husband’s contributions as important, like organizing the shed?
- What are your tips to having a good weekend with kids, especially with little kids? Do you have a set routine or plan?
shortperson says
i have curly hair and finally switched 100% to the deva curl system. i’ve been very happy. it’s a bit of a learning curve but doesnt actually take more time than other products. i also bought an old lady hair standing hair dryer and it’s done a lot for my frizz. plus i can read while i dry my hair so it’s less boring.
Anonymous says
So interested by this! I recently switched to deva curl because I switched stylists but I’m not totally sold. She did a great job in salon using conditioner/leave in/gel but I’m not getting the same results at home. It’s fuzzy and tiny curls and the gel seems sticky vs. setting in a good case that can then be broken up. Any tips? I have thin ringlet Caucasian curly hair.
Do you find the standing hair dryer worthwhile? Where do you keep it? I have such a tortured relationship with my hair that I’ve honestly considered getting one but no idea where to put it. In the master bath?
NewMomAnon says
I switched to DevaCurl about two years ago, and my hair has so much more consistent than it used to be. I have fine, loose Caucasian ringlet curls. It took about 6 months for my hair to grow out enough to get rid of the parts that were damaged beyond repair.
A word of warning: I stopped buying the DevaCurl products from Amazon after I got several shipments of the same conditioner with wildly different textures, and some of the bottles were packed so badly that only half the product made it to me. I buy directly from DevaCurl now. The price is the same, the packaging is better, they ship fast, and you get free samples.
I’ve found that it works best if I condition the way they recommend, then apply gel in the shower, scrunch it with a t-shirt to dry it, add in whatever other stuff I want to add post-shower (I like their SuperCream for winter and sometimes an argan oil hair serum), then clip and blow-dry a bit. If I do that, I don’t get the super crunchy gel cast, but I get more consistent results once it dries. It’s not the way the stylist taught me (she did gel after scrunching with their microfiber towel).
Anonymous says
Thanks for the detailed reply. My new stylist had me do leave in conditioner when soaking wet then gel when soaking wet then the t-shirt plop thing. I actually find my curls are less fizzy if they ‘set’ in the gel cast and then I scrunch to break up the gel cast when they are dry, but the deva gel seems mostly sticky and doesn’t really set like it did at the salon under the dryer.
Knope says
My trick to avoid the stickiness of the gel is to mix it with a curl-defining cream and apply both to soaking wet hair before plopping.
My trick to saving money on DevaCurl products is to wait until I have a 20% CVS coupon and then buy it there.
shortperson says
we have a too-large master bath so yes we have ample space for the stand up dryer with a chair underneath. i got a babyliss and it was much cheaper than the fancy hair dryers i was looking to upgrade to from my high school model. i use no-poo, conditioner, squeeze the water out and gel in the shower and then go right to the hair dryer for 15 min. i cant stand the feeling of a tshirt on wet hair. when i shower at the gym i use one of those deva curl attachments that looks like a scary green hand. it does a decent job.
lsw says
I’ve been intrigued with trying it but I feel like I find something that works great for my hair and then by the time I’m at the end of the bottle it isn’t working anymore. I assume it’s water/weather/hormones/who knows what else. I have fine, soft, dry Causasian curly hair that seems to be less curly after pregnancy.
Anonymous says
As a counterpoint, I also have Caucasian wavy hair and I hated the Deva Curl system. I tried several times and I could never get the mix of products right. It made me look greasy all the time. I ended up throwing them away. I do love the Deva Curl towel though.
anne-on says
Agreed – it was too thick/waxy for me. I have v. thick wavy caucasian hair. A mix of the Carol’s daughter foaming mousse in wet hair, followed by about a nickel’s worth of loma molding creme for extra definition works for me, I’ll use more product in seriously humid conditions, but this works for me most days.
lsw says
I’ve tried a few products and couldn’t get great results – but not the whole system. Intrigued by this towel, though! Will look into it.
Walnut says
I used the system for about six months and then went back to flat ironing or large barrel curling my hair. I have inconsistent curly/wavy, thick, coarse caucasian hair and my biggest issue is that I couldn’t skip washes on the system. My hair would look decent day one, but would be a total trainwreck by day three. It was a combination of sleeping on it and the product not applying well to dry hair.
Anonymous says
The product not applying well to dry hair is also where I struggle. I haven’t found a smoothing lotion for dry hair that I liked since Samy discontinued their products. Deva doesn’t seem to have a next day lightweight smoothing lotion.
Any recommendations for a large barrel curling iron? That’s one of my go-to ways to style my hair but I’ve been using a 10 year old conair so long overdue for an upgrade.
Walnut says
I replaced mine with a new version of probably that same 10 year old conair from Target. My biggest complaint is that its not quite as heavy duty as the old one, but it does the job.
NewMomAnon says
Oh, yeah – I also do a full condition/gel/scrunch/clip/dry routine every day. My curls don’t seem to revive very well on the second day. But I also haven’t tried very hard….
rosie says
A stylist at Devachan suggested diluting their One Condition in a spray bottle (about 10% conditioner, probably) to use as a smoother on dry hair. I used that for a while, and I also like the Ouidad curl refresher spray.
Cb says
I asked for some advice on guardianship on the main site and wanted to report back. We were visiting my husband’s cousins this weekend and brought up planning for baby, life insurance, etc and I awkwardly said, ‘We’d like to ask…. don’t feel like you need to decide….’ and his cousin jumped in with an “Of course we’d take the baby is something happened, it’d be our pleasure”.
It isn’t the most typical choice (2nd cousins rather than siblings) but one that feels right for us.
Pogo says
So glad to hear! This reminds me we need to get wills set up…
Anonymous says
That’s great!
My husband was an unconventional (and fantastic) guardian choice for another family, so this gives me a smile.
Anonymous says
Any suggestions for a baby gift that is more personal than a gift card but takes up little to no space? A good friend is expecting but plans to move before the baby is born so I’m trying to avoid getting something that will be a pain to pack up and move. I don’t live near her, so unfortunately can’t treat her to an experience gift.
HSAL says
Is it for a shower? Could you give her a card with a picture of the item and have it shipped after she moves? If there’s no shower and she doesn’t need it now, I’d just wait until after the move.
NewMomAnon says
Second this – if it’s not for a shower, I’d just wait and send a delicious food basket right after they move or right after baby is born.
NewMomAnon says
Books? Baby 411, Happiest Baby on the Block, and How to Talk So Kids Will Listen, with a small board book for baby would be a good gift.
anon says
silver photo frame engraved with baby’s name or initials
CHJ says
Depending on where and when she’s moving, a gift certificate for a prenatal massage in either location would be nice!
Wehaf says
A small board book.
NewMomAnon says
New school drop off was a success!!! Kiddo skipped in giggling, put her stuff away, picked up a toy and gave us one last hug. Easiest drop off in a while. It was such a relief to know all the teachers at drop off instead of a bunch of random floaters.
Fingers crossed that this is the new pattern.
avocado says
Hooray! Sounds like she is off to a great start.
anne-on says
Congratulations! Someone said it to me on this board when we switched daycare centers because I was not crazy about the first one – if you are anxious/nervous/upset about a daycare situation, you can’t be an effective employee. Finding one that works for you takes a HUGE amount of stress off your plate.
Anonymous says
Hooray!
Paging JayJay says
YAAAAAY!!!!!
anne-on says
Working mom (almost) fail. This is now the second time I have totally blanked on a project for kiddo’s pre-k class and been saved by the room mom (a friend) mentioning it as our children are playing together over the weekend. I felt slightly better about having to run out for teacher appreciation flowers in a panic yesterday as I saw alllll the moms raiding our local trader joes flower section this AM. At least I’m already prepped for the breakfast later this week!
Anon in NYC says
Thanks for reminding me about Teacher Appreciation week!
Betty says
I am “friends” with a slightly passive-aggressive SAHM who sells Mary Kay and is the PTO president. We also attend the same church. She sent me a text yesterday asking if everything was ok (we haven’t been to church since Easter) and whether I wanted to place an order for Mary Kay for Teacher Appreciation Week. I’m responding with a simple, “All set!” text but am annoyed. By way of background: This is the same mom who offered to take my kids trick-or-treating “in case I couldn’t make it home from work in time.” I’m trying to see best intentions but she makes it tough sometimes.
JayJay says
Wasn’t Easter just a couple weeks ago? Simmer down, MLM-Mom. She would be horrified at how sporadically we attend church (“Well, it’s really windy and could rain, we better stay home today”)
Walnut says
Ha – I have a neighbor who asks about my churchgoing also. Last time I told her that my check makes it even when I don’t. The stunned reaction was priceless.
Pogo says
That is great, omg.
Betty says
I need to respond with that next time!
I think she was just trolling for MLM vs. actually being concerned about our church attendance, both of which annoy me.
Anon in NYC says
I really love this.
Anonymous says
Agree with Betty. Sounds like standard MLM speak: Mention shared connection (church) to establish relationship + identify upcoming gifting event (Teacher Appreciation) + close with product offer.
anon says
Just congratulate yourself on your strategic friendship!
Anon says
Yep. This is “it takes a village” at it’s exact meaning. Congrats on building an effective village for your kids!
Anon says
Hold up, I thought Teacher Appreciation Week was next week?
Jdubs says
I thought so too?
HSAL says
Our daycare is celebrating this week, but when I just googled, it said next week. National Teacher Day is the 9th. I think it’s probably the first full week of May, but since today is the first day, some places are probably doing it this week and some next?
Rainbow Hair says
Ugh am panicking here — I’m at a meeting offsite all week, and I think teacher appreciation week was my job, damn damn I hope it’s not this week.
Anonymous says
My daycare celebrates this week. I am feeling quasi awful because I’m totally throwing money at it (I made a generous donation to their TAW fund) and not bringing in goodies for any of the food events, in part because we’ll be out of town later this week, but mostly because I didn’t plan in advance.
They also do a card shower thing, which I was great at last year and wrote personal notes on kid artwork for all my kids’ teachers and the regular floaters/support staff. This year I had good intentions, but it’s just not going to happen. Totally planning on generic “I love you, [teacher]!” signed, kid(s). On construction paper with some kid scribbles and maybe a handprint. It feels like a cop out, but I’m telling myself it’s better than nothing. Right? Right?!
Walnut says
Way better than nothing. We’re not celebrating for a couple weeks, but I’m planning Target gift cards or a contribution to the general fund. Not even bothering with art work or personalized thank yous.
AEK says
Flowers at CVS this morning en route to daycare. The only store open at 7. Surprising cute little ceramic pots with little green plants— saved!
Edna Mazur says
Thoughts? I’m expecting my third ACA era baby. I currently have two pumps, one which lives at the office while I’m pumping and one that stays at home/travels/etc.
I never even considered getting a third until I was thinking about it last night when I started thinking it might make sense to have a backup since my other two are out of warranty. If I leave it in the box, can it be donated?
I’m thinking three pumps is crazy and if one died I’d just deal, but, hmmm…
AwayEmily says
With my insurance, I could either get a free pump or get a free rental of a hospital-grade one for a few months. Because I, like you, already had two regular pumps (both hand-me-downs), I opted for the hospital-grade one. It really was a LOT better/faster. So maybe if your insurance offers that option, you could do that, and keep it at work to make the pumping sessions shorter? I don’t think the free rental period had to be immediately after the baby is born…so maybe you could start it once the baby goes to daycare.
Anonymous says
Oh, that’s a great idea! I wish I’d thought of that!
I had one pre-ACA baby and two post-ACA babies. If you can’t do the rental, I’d honestly skip the freebie. I liked having two, but three was stupid. I’m done pumping FOREVER, and it’s been hard to get rid of all the pumps.
lucy stone says
Get a Spectra S1. I did based on the advice here and I love it. It’s faster and it’s hospital grade and it isn’t a nipple ripper like Medelas AND you don’t have to be plugged into the wall.
Can you tell I had to EP for a while?
Edna Mazur says
I’ll have to look into that, it’s an excellent idea.
too many pumps... says
Does anyone know if pumps can be donated? I have a medela and someone could just replace the tubes. Any alternative to throwing it away?
Vanessa says
You can ship it back to Medela for recycling and they will make a donation to Ronald McDonald House. This was the case when I donated it…although I don’t see it on the website now.
http://www.medelabreastfeedingus.com/medela-recycles
P says
Can you get a free pump with each pregnancy? I thought it was only if your last pregnancy was more than three years ago….someone correct me if I’m wrong, please! I would love a second Medela to leave at the office and I’m 8 months pregnant with #2 (26 months apart).
Walnut says
I’m fairly certain it’s available each time. I gave mine to a coworker who needed a duplicate, so I definitely need a new one this go around (30 weeks preg with #2 – my first is 18 months.) I’ll mention it to my doc tomorrow and report back if it’s a no go.
Edna Mazur says
I got one each pregnancy and my post-ACA out-of-the womb kids are 15 months apart. We switched medical insurance in between, but same employer. Not sure if that matters.
FWIW I LOVE having one to leave at the office. I leave everything there, two sets of parts that I handwash, handsfree bra thingy, steamer bag, two bottles and some freezer bags with a Sharpie. The only thing I bring back and forth are bottles (except the two that live at work) and caps. That way if I forget caps (why can’t I remember those stupid caps?) no biggie, I can still pump and keep it cause I’ve got the freezer bags.
LegalMomma says
My babies are 19 Mo. apart and I got a pump with each of them. Anecdotally, I think the second pump is completely worth it due to the first one wearing out. I used that thing a LOT and I notice a difference when I pump at home with the old one versus using the new one at work.
Anonymous says
This. I got a pump with each (though they are spaced out a bit more than that) and actually bought a second pump with my first so I could have one at the office and one at home. Having two is wonderful and they do tend to wear out a bit with such heavy usage (I mean, they still work, but it doesn’t work as well and they seem to get louder). I got yet another pump with my second pregnancy for a total of three – now one lives at home, one lives at the office, and a third lives in my car so I never forget it for work travel.
avocado says
Dear co-worker: What part of “I am home with pneumonia so don’t send me a million e-mails demanding I take care of trivial things right this minute” is so difficult to understand? Sigh.
rosie says
Wow. Rest up & feel better soon, though!
Anon says
What sunscreens are your favorite for infants and toddlers? Ideally looking for something that is easy to apply.
Anonymous says
Ombrelle has been the best for us. Generally use SPF 30 as the higher SPF is only an incremental increase in protection. For water activities, I use the sunsuits (either one piece or two piece) that cover arms down to elbows and legs to the knees – this minimizes the amount of time spent applying and reapplying sunscreen.
Blueberry says
I like ThinkBaby, and I’ve seen others on here recommend it too. We also use a Babo Botanicals spray-on kind sometimes, which probably is too thin to give them as much protection as they should get, but my kids are such PITAs about sunscreen that I can’t let the perfect be the enemy of the good. It is (relatively) easy to just spray it on them on the porch, although I wouldn’t spray it on their faces, obviously.
PS – Any tips to get toddlers not to throw a fit when putting on sunscreen appreciated! I worry that my toddler will give himself a concussion from the wild flailing he does every time I get near him with sunscreen.
Pogo says
Do it while they’re strapped into the carseat and sing/talk excited about where you are going (assuming it’s to the park/pool/beach/etc). For backyard playtime, this obviously does not work.
Anon in NYC says
Yep, really like ThinkBaby.
rakma says
YMMV on this one, but we had about 3 days where we said OK, no sunscreen, no playing outside, and then didn’t go outside. (No, those were not super fun days in our house, but I’ve got pale skin and pale kids, this was a hill I was willing to die on) DD started begrudgingly allowing us to put it on at that point, and now, she demands sunscreen before playing outside. She also ‘helps’ me put on my sunscreen, which is both adorable and completely ineffective.
We use the Babyganics Mineral Based sunscreen on the kids. It does not rub in well, in part because it’s got the physical sunscreen ingredients, but I’m really happy with the coverage. I use it on myself when we’re swimming, but not for everyday.
Blueberry says
We may need to do this one weekend. Sigh. I dunno. My 4-year-old is starting to get it (I may or may not have told him that he needs to wear it so it doesn’t get cancer. He doesn’t know what cancer is, but this was probably not my finest parenting move). So, he’s okay in his finer moments, but unfortunately, he gets riled up by the 2-year-old freaking out about not wanting it rather than inspiring the 2-year-old to wear it too…
SC says
“We have to wear this so we don’t get cancer/sick/hurt” seems fine to me. What am I missing? I usually say something like, “This protects us from the sun,” but every time I do, I realize Kiddo has NO idea what that means, how the sun might hurt us, and why the sun doesn’t always hurt us.
Blueberry says
Yeah, I tend to say “This keeps our skin safe from the sun”, which somehow seems preferable to saying, “If you don’t wear sunscreen, you’re going to get cancer!”, which I think is a bit much, at least for my sensitive kid. I used to say they should wear it to avoid getting a sunburn, but their skin isn’t so fair that they would get sunburns unless they were out for hours in the middle of the day, so I didn’t want them to think of it as an empty threat.
EB0220 says
I’m a fan of ThinkBaby too.
Jen says
We have always had the kids “help”. And simply made it anrule. Just like the car doesn’t drive unless everyone is buckled, no outside w/out sunscreen. I knew it worked when my older kid (3.5) told me “the sun came out and I’m not wearing a hat! And we need sunscreen!!”. It’s been raining/cloudy all AM.
October says
ThinkBaby smells delicious (like a creamsicle) but it feels really drying/chalky on my hands after I apply it. I’ve heard good things about Blue Lizard so am going to try that one this year.
CHJ says
I spent a lot of time reading these reviews and trying various recommended sunscreens last summer:
http://www.ewg.org/sunscreen/
And my favorite one was Blue Lizard. It’s a little bit hard to find, but our Wegmans carries it and I’m sure it’s on Amazon.
If you don’t mind a conventional sunscreen, one of my friends has a Neutrogena stick that I love – so easy and quick to apply with no mess. I might get one of those for this summer too.
anon says
+1 for Blue Lizard. It is so much easier to rub in than the other mineral based sunscreens I’ve tried. It does cost an arm and a leg though.
FTMinFL says
I really REALLY love Endurance Shield sunblock. I used it while training for a significant endurance event over the course of a year in Florida (15+ hours in direct sunlight per week) and barely had any tan lines at the end of the 11 month period. It is pricey, but given where we live and how remarkably well it performs in the presence of sweat, pool/beach water, sand, etc., I am willing to pay. It smells great and a little goes a long way. I actually also use it in place of moisturizer under my make up daily. I just tell little guy that we are going to “do lotion” which is something that he loves, so he doesn’t fight it too much. On top of that, we use rashguards, hats and sunglasses (yes, this is probably excessive, but we literally haven’t had a cloudy day since November!).
Rainbow Hair says
So far, no complaints with Babyganics. (Used it on me, too (#lazy) and no complaints from my face either.)
RR says
I love the California Baby stick for the face. It’s just so easy to smooth it over their little faces. I use a variety of lotions for the body, but California Baby is one of my favs there too.
AEK says
Badger and BARE. Babyganics for the giant tube at daycare. I like all three. My toddler immediately shreaks and runs when approached with any kind of lotion or cream but it’s not brand-specific:)
My husband I also used the Babyganics on recent beach vacation & it was great.
LegalMomma says
Blue Lizard works well for my eczema prone children. Started with California baby but was getting a lot of rashes, switched to blue lizard (on Ped’s recommendation) no more rashes.
lsw says
Our entire family had the stomach flu over the weekend (I was Patient Zero, starting Thursday night) and my husband and I are barely back at work today. It reminded me so much of my first six months of pregnancy that my “maybe we should have another!” thoughts got pushed back at least a few more months. I feel like I remember reading a similar post from someone else last week and all I can say is SOLIDARITY. This was our first full-family illness – the baby is 9 months, my stepdaughter is with us part time and is 11 – and it was brutal. I am just grateful that with my husband and I it seemed to go in waves so at least one of us could change a diaper at any given moment.
Anon in NYC says
Yikes. Glad you’re all on the mend! We just finished up 1.5 weeks with norovirus. The worst.
lsw says
1.5 weeks! I am so sorry. I was losing my mind after four days.
Pogo says
Question about baby sleeping arrangements…
I have the opportunity to leave a full-size mattress on the floor in the nursery (keeping the whole bed would not fit, but I think just the mattress on the floor would). That would give me the option of either cosleeping on the floor mattress (which sounded like the safest cosleeping option for babies that will only sleep on you, though I hope to God mine is not like that) or just sleeping in there with baby in the crib.
I’d planned to keep baby in a bassinet next to my bed, but someone pointed out to me that you still need to get up to change the baby every time they nurse. Is it better to decamp to baby’s room or keep them in with you?
I don’t have to decide immediately, worst case is we move the mattress to storage and then decide we need it and have to move it back, but I’m wondering if there’s strong anecdotal evidence for a preference of sleeping with baby in their room as opposed to bringing baby into yours.
Anonymous says
I had a queen size bed in the nursery while my oldest was a newborn and it was fabulous. Honestly, I never slept on it – she slept with us until about 4 months and then moved successfully to her own room and mostly slept all night. But it was great for changing clothes, drying off after baths, etc. You don’t realize how small a changing pad is until you try and dress a wet, wriggling baby.
This time, I have the baby in the bedroom still at 5 months and it’s working for us. I also don’t change in the middle of the night unless there’s poop though.
FTMinFL says
Replied below in error!
avocado says
If you sleep in baby’s room and your partner stays in the bedroom, it will be much harder to get your partner to change the baby after you’ve nursed, or to give baby a bottle once during the night so you can get a longer stretch of sleep. If you are on the floor and baby is in the crib, you won’t be able to reach over and soothe baby without getting out of bed, and the temptation to cosleep will be greater (which it sounds like you’d rather avoid). For these reasons, I’d try the bassinet in your room first. This is what we did and we never went into the nursery to change diapers–I think we just threw a waterproof pad down in the bassinet or on the bed and changed them right there. That said, it couldn’t hurt to keep all of your options open by leaving the mattress in baby’s room.
Anon in NYC says
I agree – keep the mattress because there’s no harm in doing so, but I think keeping the baby in your room is one of the easier ways to set up a more equitable division from the start.
AnonMN says
With our second we had everything in our room, changing station, co-sleeper, etc. It was really nice for the first couple of months. He was a hates his crib co-sleeper, so we ended up moving our mattress to the floor once he got mobile. I think having a mattress on the floor in his room would have been so nice (and something I am considering once we have #3) for once I went back to work. Then it would have been easier to switch nights with my partner and have the other one get a full nights rest.
But, I think this falls solidly in the “you don’t know until you know” decisions. It’s really hard to know what kind of sleeper you are going to get, and what kind of night time parents you are going to be. With that being said, I would leave the mattress (pulling it out of storage is going to seem like a lot of working if you have a terrible sleeper on your hands). You can always put it away if it’s annoying.
Anonymous says
We had baby in a bassinette next to the bed (one that was the height so I could lay my hand on baby’s belly while i was in bed. Then we moved in the crib when baby got too big for the bassinette. For diapers, we kept a change pad/wipes/diapers in a caddy on my dresser and just put the pad down the bed to change baby. It’s only right at the beginning that you need to change them for every feed. That stage passes pretty quickly.
Agree that for equal division of labor, have baby in the room with both of you. On DH’s night to get up, he can hand you baby to nurse, you nurse, he changes baby, you nurse on other side, he settles baby back into crib. After a few weeks, I could nurse comfortably side lying so I barely had to open my eyes to latch baby and he took care of everything in between. He slept with ear plugs and eye mask on my nights to get up .
Meg Murry says
Will you be having any houseguests (and do you have a separate guest room)? If you’ll be having guests and no guest room, I’d say keep the mattress in the baby’s room, because you can always put the baby in a PnP in your room if you need to. Mattress on the floor isn’t an ideal guest bed, but it’s better than the couch or floor.
OTOH, if you are afraid you may have out of town family that might decide to show up and stay that you don’t really want as houseguests (like in-laws) you may want to make that mattress disappear.
However, either way I wouldn’t put a mattress into storage (unless by storage you just mean into a room you don’t use often) – I’ve never seen a mattress come out of a storage unit that was in usuable condition – at best they had an odd damp smell, at worst had been infested by mice, gotten wet and mildew-y, etc.
Pogo says
We have other guest rooms, and the mattress would be stored in one of those rooms leaning against the wall. It’s just that it’s down two flights of stairs from the baby’s room, so a bit of a PITA to move back up…. but not impossible. I guess I’ll confer with husband and my dad, since they’re the ones who’d have to lug it back up!
I’m hesitant to get rid of the mattress entirely because if we go the au pair route someday, it will be the au pair’s bed (in the room we’re planning to move it to). Since it is a climate controlled, non-attic/basement, I’m hoping it’ll be fine in a plastic cover.
thanks to everyone for the thoughts! I think it is definitely a “know your baby” situation, which of course I don’t know yet!
anon says
No opinion on the two options but I did want to share that i read somewhere that it is possible to not change newborn poopy diapers overnight without causing problems in you are using disposables. If I had another baby I might experiment with this. For pee, you can definitely leave it overnight in a disposable unless the diaper is getting too full (seems very unlikely with a small baby but maybe it is possible).
Anonymous says
You can’t do that with a breastfed newborn though. The doctor wants to know that the baby has had 6+ wet diapers a day to make sure they are eating enough/not dying of dehydration.
By 9 weeks, my kiddo started sleeping through the night (5 nights out of 7) which was basically when she stopped pooping at night too. Wet disposables are fine.
Cassity says
Disagree that you can’t leave a breastfed newborn in a wet diaper overnight. Yes, you need to monitor wet diapers, but you can skip one or two MOTN changes and still be confident the baby is eating enough.
Anonymous says
+1 you can tell the diaper is wet but you don’t need to change it unless it’s poopy or bursting. That said, in the first month, we often changed baby in between switching brea$ts to wake baby up enough to drink enough to get a longer stretch of sleep.
Anonymous says
Unless there is a reason for concern the doctor really doesn’t care that much about the number of wet diapers. Especially past the first few days. I’d be not change if it was poopy, very wet or leaking.
I’d leave the mattress on the floor, even if baby doesn’t sleep there it can be a nice place for tummy time or naps.
Butter says
Definitely a fan of the bed on the floor plan. Having multiple sleeping options is important for both parents. In my case I would occasionally decamp to the second bedroom when we were trying to reduce middle of the night wakeups (baby slept in our room but sometimes would stir and smell milk, would stir when we went to the bathroom and smell milk, etc etc.).
Also in general mattresses are great. We didn’t have a changing table – just used a keekaroo peanut on the mattress or the floor instead. Very comfy to sit and fold laundry, read, etc.
Meg Murry says
I agree that having an option for a place for one adult to go so the other can get some uninterrupted sleep is a good idea. I also took the baby and slept in the living room (baby in bouncy seat, me on couch or in a recliner) during the worst of the nurse every hour on the hour growth spurts when I was still on maternity leave and my husband was back to work and had an important day the next day, or when he was feeling sick. In trade for me leaving him alone to get a halfway decent night’s sleep, he would take either an early morning shift so I could catch a nap before he left for work, and/or go on kid duty as soon as he got home so I could crash.
That said, it took me a long time to get the hang of nursing in any position other than sitting up with something against my back for support, preferably in a chair with at least 1 arm. So if you only have room for the mattress or a comfortable chair – in the earliest days, I’d go with a chair, but later on you might want the mattress once you get the hang of side-lying nursing.
Anonymous says
Am I correct in assuming that baby isn’t here yet? So you don’t know their tendencies?
It could go either way. I had a double bed in the nursery with one of my babies because in the end it was easier for me to nurse laying down and husband couldn’t sleep with baby in our bed. We’re firmly on Team Someone Should Be Sleeping. But I didn’t need it for second baby, who would sleep best alone.
I’m going to vote option 3: Put in a couch or loveseat instead. It’s so much more convenient/comfortable for nursing, you can all fit for bedtime reading, and it works as a bed if kiddo wants company after a nightmare, etc.
Rainbow Hair says
Yes, I love having a loveseat in kiddo’s room — first for nursing, and now for pre-bed snuggles. And it’s somewhere to crash when you just can’t leave.
Initially we bought a really cheap foldout loveseat, I wanna say from Wayfair? Anyway, it was great and now we have a real loveseat and it’s even better.
Pogo says
Oooo I like this idea too.
Cassity says
Not to be too contrarian today, but you should read up on safe co-sleeping practices before doing this. I had never planned to co-sleep, but then of course I had a baby that wouldn’t sleep unless he was touching me for the first 4 months of life, so my grand plans went out the window and I had to research co-sleeping safe habits. Turns out the vast majority of co-sleeping disasters occur during these sort of “ad hoc” co-sleeping nights where you fall asleep with the baby on the couch or loveseat. Deliberate, safe co-sleeping in your bed (with no loose clothing, pillows or blankets, a firm mattress, etc.) is actually quite safe.
Anonymous says
+1 DO NOT co-sleep on a loveseat. Co-sleeping can be safe but best to prepare in advance and avoid ad-hoc situations. Firm mattress on the ground with no pillow and a light sheet to your waist is good.
Rainbow Hair says
Oh yeah for sure not for sleeping WITH the kid — but like, if mom needs to stay in kid’s room all night or whatever… then it’s really nice to have.
For cosleeping, which we did for the first few months, I loved the First Years Close and Secure Cosleeper that goes on the bed but has walls so you can’t squish baby.
Anonymous BigLaw Associate says
For about the first year after we had twins, I kept our old queen bed in the twins’ room. My husband and I slept separately during that time. We’d do some sort of alternation on who was on “baby duty” – meaning who slept on the queen bed in the babies’ room. I was on baby duty during my entire maternity leave, but then we either alternated by day or by week, whatever made sense with work etc. It lets the other person actually get sleep about half the time.
Anonymous BigLaw Associate says
I should add we always just did cribs. No co-sleeping, and no bassinets.
Anon says
We left a mattress on the floor in my son’s room and it was a lifesaver after we moved him into his room around 4 months. One of us would sleep there when he was sick, just for peace of mind. Now he’s 2.5 and we use it every night for reading books before bed. There’s enough room for the whole family (including our golden retriever who he likes to snuggle with). It’s been so great that we’ve adopted the same setup for his baby sister’s room too!
FTMinFL says
I’m not sure if I’m the best or the worst person to offer advice on this topic because we have run the gamut of sleeping arrangements! We tried a bassinet (pack n play), rock n play, crib, and cosleeping in the newborn days and cosleeping was really the easiest for me. We brought him into our bed at night until he was 6-7 months old when we night weaned and moved him to his crib. We put a twin mattress+boxspring on the floor in his room when he was around 12 months and it was incredibly useful for a return to cosleeping as his one-year molars came in.
I guess what I’m saying is that flexibility may be your best bet, so I would keep the mattress and be ok with not using it :)
Also, you may not have to change baby every time they nurse (but you might!). My little guy grew out of the poop-every-time-he-ate phase by 2-3 weeks. Good luck!
Megs says
Need sock help for my 8 year old boy – he has very sensitive feet and over-reacts to any seams near his toes. We’ve been buying Stance socks, but they are painfully expensive ($10/pair) and don’t hold up over the long-term (he does wear the same pairs multiple times per week, so this may be overuse and not Stance’s fault). Anyone have any recommendations for other brands that might be good to try out?
AwayEmily says
I remember an Ask Metafilter thread about this awhile back: maybe some ideas there? http://ask.metafilter.com/288269/Seamless-bumpless-socks-for-toddler
Clementine says
No suggestions for a seamless sock, but a running tip is to wear your socks inside out so that the bulk of the seams are on the outside.
Maybe not for this kiddo, but my nephew was thrilled when I turned his socks inside out to magically not have the seam on his toes.
Anon says
This. My daughter did this on her own, and I just went with it. We buy the nondescript white ones from Target so no worries about patterns.
Anon in NYC says
Bombas? Caveat that I haven’t tried them, but they talk about their “invisitoe” technology.
shortperson says
primary claims their seams are comfortable, you could try those.
NewMomAnon says
Are his shoes too small? Seams pressing on toes sounds like a “shoes pressing seams into toes” problem.
Megs says
It has lasted through multiple pairs of shoes (whether new/size up or old/maybe too small)… and the Stance socks are *usually* good with no whining…so I think somehow it’s truly the socks. I’ll try a few of the other brands and on bad laundry days try the inside-out trick. Thanks guys! Appreciate all the recs and any others would be great.
Wehaf says
I haven’t tried them, but I’ve heard good things about smartknit socks.
CLMom says
Late in the day, but please read/reply.
Do daycares give discounts for bad injuries to the child? Last week my daughter (1.5 years old) fell off a chair at daycare and hit her face on a block on the floor. Could have injured the eye (didn’t – thankfully), but got a nasty shiner. Today they called because she feel off her chair backwards and are now monitoring her for a possible concussion.
My first priority is her safety, but I also feel like I’m paying a ton of money with the expectation that she will be well-cared for. I feel like something more than a “it was an accident, which we’re monitoring” is warranted. Something to make me feel better. If it were Starbucks or the car dealership or something other than my daughter, I would fight for a discount. But I’m not sure the same logic applies…can you enlighten me?
For reference, this is a large, corporate facility.
Marilla says
I don’t see the link between safety and discounts – I don’t think this is like getting a discount or a comped meal somewhere else. But I would be super concerned about two similar incidents in the space of two weeks. What’s their teacher student ratio like?
CLMom says
They ALWAYS maintain at least 4 to 1. Today, I think it was 9 to 3.
Yes, this is different than a comped meal, but I feel like there is no gesture or anything done in an attempt to make me feel better. It’s just a piece of news.
Marilla says
I agree with the posters below who suggest pushing for a plan to prevent these types of incidents in the future. Good luck :) (And I hope your little one doesn’t have a concussion! Mine is around the same age and definitely likes to try to dive head-first off her little chair…)
M says
Right – if you don’t think she’s safe/being cared for properly, look for another childcare arrangement. But if you have confidence in the daycare and think it’s just a coincidence she had two accidents in rapid succession, then no I don’t see any reason to ask for a discount.
ElisaR says
I haven’t considered asking for a discount when my son has been injured – I would ask for a meeting about what is going on in that classroom though. I mean I know kids can do crazy things but 2 injuries like that in such a short time might mean its time to reassess their processes. I can’t see them offering a discount though. And honestly, I don’t really want that – my daycare is expensive because they are keeping an exceptionally close eye on my kid (i hope).
Anonymous says
I would check regulations for your area. Our area requires incident reports be written to parents after those types of injuries. Their monitoring social worker reviews them. I wouldn’t be looking for a discount but I would be looking for a meeting after both incidents happened because of the same issue (falling from chair) and I would want them to have a plan to prevent in the future. Different type of chair? She sits in the chair immediately next to the caregiver etc.
CLMom says
Yes, they provide written incident reports.
Walnut says
I wouldn’t ask for a discount – I’d look for a new daycare. I switched my first one because teacher turnover started going through the roof and he had two accidents during splash time. One involved him climbing out of the wading pool and smacking his head on the concrete below. I had already though splash time for kids under 1 was bonkers and two accidents related to it sealed the deal.
Momata says
I am not sure a discount is an appropriate ask. I think if you are dissatisfied, the remedy is a conversation about best practices and how similar incidents can be prevented in the future. Also, I’d be surprised if their large corporate HQ would let them give money after an injury in fear of it appearing like an admission of negligence.
Also, both my kids at 1.5 years got shiners at least once a week for a couple months. With my daughter it was so bad that our friends joked it should be a drinking game. I’m not sure what happens around that age but mine were both clumsy AF.
AEK says
Almost certainly no. Check your registration / enrollment paperwork. You likely signed a lease of all liability. However, it is often possible to file an insurance claim if you have damages (medical bills etc.). Just get the director in the loop.
I learned all about this after a similar experience.
CLMom says
Thanks, everyone. Hubby and I will be talking through some options tonight.
HSAL says
I agree with the other posters above about not asking for a discount (it just rubs me the wrong way, like it’s okay for your child to be injured if it’s cheaper) and checking on their practices, but I will add a friend’s experience. Her son fell at daycare and had to get stitches, and she asked daycare to cover the ER bill. I was really surprised (liability releases, etc.) but they paid it, and it was a larger chain. I hope that doesn’t happen to little CLMom, of course, but it’s something to keep in mind.
mascot says
This may have been a maneuvering by their health insurance too. We had two incidents resulting in stitches from accidents at daycare and both times I had to answer a bunch of questions from my insurance company about who was responsible for the injury, what happened, etc. In both cases, these were true accidents where my kid was running and tripped because little kids are often clumsy and I was very clear that daycare didn’t cause the injury. Had I or the insurance company pushed it further, we probably could have filed against the daycare’s liability insurance.
Blueberry says
Yeah, our old daycare offered to pay when my son went to the ER, but we refused because it was a total accident. The insurance company kept asking for details about it, which was super uncomfortable for me given that it could have happened under anyone’s care.
Anon in NYC says
We had a similar experience. We took my daughter to the ER because of an accident while she was at daycare. Insurance kept asking about the incident.
avocado says
We also had this experience. Kid was injured in freak sports incident at after-school, health insurance company demanded all kinds of information about the incident and the facility. I was embarrassed at the idea that the insurance company would try to go after the facility because I didn’t want the staff to think we blamed them.
Rainbow Hair says
I just want to chime in that I think I understand your feelings.
When Kiddo was allowed to get into something dangerous at daycare — which led to an ER trip (she was ultimately fine, but it could’ve be a bad situation!) — I was so upset with them, and I went in to talk to them and just… I wanted *something*, some show of remorse? I wanted that pound of flesh :-P
But realistically there was nothing they could give me that would take away the disappointment and fear. When I came in to tell them about what happened, they were really upset too: they love my Kiddo a lot. I ultimately decided that it was a mistake, and I trusted them, but man it was a bad feeling for a while.
CLMom says
Thank you! It’s really not the money, it’s the gesture. Some THING to make me feel like it’s not okay that this happened twice in such short succession. The first I was really cool about, but this one left me feeling…well, all sorts of feelings. And I’m not sure where/how to channel them.
Blueberry says
+ 1 that either you feel it’s a safe place for your child and accidents happen so they don’t owe you anything, or it’s not and you need to pull your kid. FWIW, my kids have both had multiple accidents warranting pickups for emergency medical attention while at school but I don’t feel it’s an unsafe place — they are just klutzes like their mama. But falling from a chair twice in quick succession sounds a bit odd, so you should probably at least discuss with them why that in particular keeps happening.
PatsyStone says
I always thought I tied two kids. We have a 4yo boy. It occurred to me today that we all might be better off just getting a second dog honestly. So weird to change sides.
mascot says
Yep, it’s hard to wrap your head around sometimes. It took about a year to get really comfortable in that decision.
Signed, mom of a 6yr old boy, two dogs and a couple of fish.
anon says
I felt that way until I experienced pregnancy and the first year, but four year old boy-ness is a lot too!
Anonymous says
Yup. Two working ‘big’ finance/consulting jobs = 1 kid, dog, cat, and lots of cousins and friend play dates. No guilt.
Best birthday gifts for 2.5 year old? says
Looking for ideas under $30…
PatsyStone says
I think I’ve been envisioning it as some sort of duty. Now I think how much I would have to give up. Not to mention that I am pretty sure it may really affect my marrriage. All of a sudden I’m thinking why on earth would I do that to myself. We’re not wealthy, no family in town. My son is friendly and outgoing, just like my only child extrovert husband. Why mess with a pretty good thing?