These shorts from J.Crew are my favorite weekend wear. I think I have them in about three or four different colors, and I’m always on the lookout for sales to add more to my wardrobe. At this point in my life, I don’t want to wear anything shorter than a 5-inch inseam. These shorts are comfortable and always come in a bunch of colors. I also find that the chino fabric is thick enough so that they don’t continuously ride up. Depending on the color, these shorts are available in sizes 00–16 for $45. The style doesn’t change much, if at all, over time, so they almost always go on sale at the end of the season! 5″ Stretch Chino Short
Old Navy has 5″ stretch twill shorts on sale for $13.50 in sizes 16–30.
This post contains affiliate links and CorporetteMoms may earn commissions for purchases made through links in this post. For more details see here. Thank you so much for your support!
AnotherAnon says
06/28/2019 at 9:18 amI love all of April’s picks – been wearing these shorts for years. Can we do another round of cute things your kid is doing lately? I don’t have anything particularly earth shattering, but I’d like to hear yours.
Anon says
06/28/2019 at 9:30 amMy 16 month old has been sick all week and yesterday she was finally better and over dinner DH and I were discussing how she was well enough to go to the park after dinner. She immediately scooped up everything on her tray, shoved it in her mouth and with big bulging chipmunk cheeks yelled “DONE!” She’s been understanding lots of words here and there for a while, but this was the first time I’ve seen her clearly comprehend a multi-step idea (she gets to go to the park, but not until she finishes her dinner) and act on it, and her enthusiasm was adorable.
GCA says
06/28/2019 at 9:48 amMy 10mo currently likes to make things ‘disappear’ and ‘reappear’. She’ll wave a sheet of paper at us (we cheer), drop it on the floor behind the kid table (we go ‘where is it?’), then pick it up again and wave it around with a flourish, like ‘behold! I have made this piece of paper vanish and reappear!’.
4yo’s preschool BFF just moved away, so I FaceTimed the other mom and let the kids giggle at each other over video chat. Did they talk to each other? No, they just spent the entire time giggling.
Anonymous says
06/28/2019 at 9:51 amMy yougest started walking yesterday, and also smacking her lips to “blow” kisses. She’s also taken to comfortingly patting people on the back when they hug her.
My middle made an extremely elaborate picnic for her 5 baby dolls with all of our kid plates/utensils/my napkins etc this am. It was too cute to be annoyed about the mess.
My oldest has started reading picture books to the younger two!
Anonymous says
06/28/2019 at 11:40 amMy two year old does the comforting back pats, too, and it’s the cutest. However, when I patted his back the other day as he was sitting in my bed with a book while I dozed, he matter-of-factly said, “mommy, will you please stop petting me because I am not a dog.”
CPA Lady says
06/28/2019 at 9:55 amMine are both word things– we’ve been going to the pool a lot and my daughter calls her pool noodle her “poodle”. And she was trying to say something about her big toe, and she called it her “thumb toe”. So of course, I have now started using this language too because they are both amusing to me.
lsw says
06/28/2019 at 10:41 amHahaha, I love these both! So many times, kid words are better than the real words (I submit “hanitizer” for consideration).
Everlong says
06/28/2019 at 10:50 amWe have hanitizer, too!!!!!!
ElisaR says
06/28/2019 at 12:09 pmhanitizer! yes. that’s ours too.
Anonymous says
06/28/2019 at 10:14 am2 year old just called me by my first name for the first time this morning. And started thanking people, unprompted, for any gifts or nice things. The latter makes me proud of myself as a parent!
IHeartBacon says
06/28/2019 at 12:46 pmMy 2 year old has started thanking people unprompted too. It warms my heart because it makes me realize he now knows what it means and is saying thank you out of genuine gratitude. <3
Quail says
06/28/2019 at 10:18 amMy kid is now 4, and 4 is just the best age. This morning he was a mouse – he was very quiet, and carried around a stuffie that he proclaimed was his cheese. Every now and again, he’d nibble on the cheese. He proclaimed that his scooter was very small, because he was a mouse, and he was going to ride his mouse-scooter to school. Luckily the scooter was also made of cheese so if he got hungry on the way he could take a nibble. He sang “I’m a mouse, I’m a mouse” in a new song he wrote called, you guessed it, “The Mouse Song.”
He’s got a baby sister on the way, and the other day he told me, out of nowhere, that he was going to sleep on one side of his (twin) bed so that his baby sister could sleep on the other side “when she got big enough.” My heart pretty much melted because I’m a little nervous of how he’ll react from losing his “only” status in a few months.
ElisaR says
06/28/2019 at 10:31 amaww sounds like he’s going to be a great big brother!
Quail says
06/28/2019 at 11:29 am:) Fingers crossed!
GCA says
06/28/2019 at 10:56 amAww! 4 really is the best. I got to spend some one on one time with the 4yo the other day (took him to the pool and out for a burrito after daycare) and it was just enjoyable the whole time. I think yours will be a great big brother. Mine had a short period of adjusting to no longer being an only child, but 10 months in they are so adorable together.
Quail says
06/28/2019 at 11:28 amYes, it’s awesome that there are periods where it’s just fun to be with them! Like hey, this parenting thing isn’t so bad after all. (And of course there are also the meltdowns, but they seem to be less frequent right now…knock on wood.) Glad to hear the adjustment can go well. I think the newborn stage will be a surprise. But it’s going to be a surprise for me too and I’ve been there done that!
Anonymous says
06/28/2019 at 11:16 am4 is the best and worst. My 4 year old’s tantrums are the worst they’ve been so far, but when she’s sweet, she’s SO sweet. The other night I was snuggling her at bedtime, and she asked me, “mommy, can you tell me about YOUR day? What friends did you see? And what color were their shirts?” shirt color is apparently a very important piece of information these days, she’s asked every day this week since then.
Quail says
06/28/2019 at 11:31 amThat is so cute! It’s fun to think that they realize that they go to school, and we go to work, and we have our own worlds to talk about.
And agreed that the tantrums are a new level. It’s like all the day to day whining and frustration of three has compressed itself into explosive four tantrums.
govtattymom says
06/28/2019 at 10:34 amMy 3 yo daughter has been really into fairy tales recently, so I bought her a Golden Book of Beauty and the Beast. She is obsessed! She didn’t want to eat dinner last night because she couldn’t bring it to the table. She asked about the book the second she woke up this morning. She took it as her show and share today! I never thought she would be so excited about a book! My book worm heart is happy!
govtattymom says
06/28/2019 at 10:36 amMy 3 yo is really into fairy tales, so I bought her a Golden Book of Beauty and the Beast. She is obsessed! She didn’t want to eat dinner last night because she couldn’t take it to the table. She asked about it first thing this morning! She brought it for show and share. My book worm heart is so happy!
More Sleep Would Be Nice says
06/28/2019 at 10:39 amWe had some fun morning snuggles after getting DS (19 months) in bed with us today. Before getting off the bed DS nuzzled up to the pillow and said “NIGHT NIGHT!” as if he was going to sleep. I found the fact that he actually made the association so cute, especially since he sleeps in a PnP!
lsw says
06/28/2019 at 10:42 amSomeone at daycare must be calling my son “babe”, because now he says “ere-a go, babe!” (here you go, babe!) every time he hands us something.
AnotherAnon says
06/28/2019 at 11:12 amomg I would die. That is too cute!
Anon says
06/28/2019 at 10:43 amWhen I try to put my almost 2 year old to bed and she’s not ready, she sometimes pats the bed or the floor nearby for me to lay down, kisses my forehead, rubs my back, and puts a blanket over me – essentially tucking mama in (and then tries to make a break for it just like mama does!).
rosie says
06/28/2019 at 10:47 amThat is so adorable.
Anon says
06/28/2019 at 11:20 amThanks! I take comfort in the fact that her comprehension is good and that she can follow processes, because unlike all of the other 2 year olds (and younger) in this thread, she’s still not talking yet (other than a handful of words used very infrequently). I know she’ll talk when she’s ready and the pediatrician said we’d re-evaluate at her 2 year old appointment, but man am I ready for her to talk!
AnotherAnon says
06/28/2019 at 11:45 amMy son is 2.5 and this morning he said his first sentence: “mama, rinse teetee” which means he wants to take a shower to rinse off the pee from his nighttime diaper. I was very pleased. Also, I try really hard not to compare him to his 18 mo friend who is a girl and has been speaking full sentences for months.
lsw says
06/28/2019 at 12:35 pm+1, my son turns three in 2 weeks and his long sentences are few and far between. (The other day I was so excited that I actually called my husband when he said, “I want a present. Present that is an Ewok.”) I stress out because his friends at school basically can have a full-blown conversation with me. My ped keeps telling me not to worry (lol, right) because he is constantly, albeit slowly, improving, but yeah, I freak out about it a lot. Hang in there. You’re not alone.
IHeartBacon says
06/28/2019 at 3:57 pmI can’t handle how adorable this is.
Mnp says
06/28/2019 at 10:46 amI went in to snuggle my 7 year old awake this morning… the first thing he said was “mom, is a rock the same as a stone?”…”yes…why do you ask?”…”just curious”. I love the fact that his little brain wakes up curious about random things
Anon. says
06/28/2019 at 11:00 amMy husband and I both grew up in farm country where there is a strong brand loyalty to equipment manufacturers that is often generational. My two year old now knows that Daddy’s tractor is Red and Mama’s tractor is Green and proclaims it frequently. Last night he noticed that his book had a red tractor and a green combine and proudly announced: Daddy tractor! Mama pombine! Both of his grandpas would be so proud.
Suomynona says
06/28/2019 at 4:02 pmI love that.
Spirograph says
06/28/2019 at 11:14 amMy kids have been getting along so well recently! Last night, they were all marching around the house together with rifles made out of duplos, pretending to be hunters (but apparently mixed up about what hunters actually do), and chanting “HUNT, two, three, four” in a military cadence. The two year old stopped by to tell me that they were hunting bad guys, and the older kids quickly chimed into clarify, “we only hunt mean things, not anything nice like foxes and bunnies.”
This morning, the boys woke up way before everyone else. 6 year old apparently took 2 year old outside to wave to the garbage men (I was a little alarmed when I saw the front door open having slept through the whole thing), and then they went off to build block castles together so they could play knights, which is where I found them happy and quiet. Fingers crossed they’ll let us sleep in this weekend, too!
lsw says
06/28/2019 at 12:36 pmAhhhhhh, that is so sweet!!!
SC says
06/28/2019 at 11:50 amMy 4-year-old got bunk beds this week. He was SO excited about his bunk bed, he was running up and down the hallway with a huge smile on his face, and kept asking DH and me to go to his room and see it.
He’s also sleeping in a new room, and his old room is the play room (we basically reorganized our house this week). His therapist advised us to involve him in the process, have him help us move, and let him choose where things go. It turns out that was GREAT advice. And Kiddo was super helpful–last night while DH and I moved his train table and a toy shelf from the sun room to his new play room, Kiddo packed up ALL his trains and tracks from the sun room floor and carried them to his play room.
(Also, unrelated to anything specific Kiddo has done, but our sun room is now a peaceful adult retreat where I can read or have a glass of wine and talk to DH, and our office is much more conveniently located in an unused dining room, which makes me happy.)
Quail says
06/28/2019 at 3:37 pmThat is awesome. We are going through some renovations and will have to be moving a bunch of stuff, including kiddo’s room. Thanks for the reminder to involve him in the process of moving and choosing where things go – it’s going to be rough as it is.
Cb says
06/28/2019 at 12:04 pmMy son grabbed his bag and told us ‘I’m going to go to playpark!…’ then looked at us expectantly and said ‘shall we?’ He’s two this summer and so so verbal and hilarious.
Spirograph says
06/28/2019 at 12:19 pmso cute! It cracks me up when kids use vocab or constructions that I associate with formal adults.
CCLA says
06/28/2019 at 12:26 pmMy almost 3-yr old has taken to telling her 8-mo old sister “It’s okay, I’m here for you” when baby sister is upset. She also sings her a song that she has deemed baby’s favorite song (just a random kids song, which strangely does typically calm baby down, perhaps because she’s staring at big sis wondering why she is suddenly loudly singing at her). I love seeing them together and especially seeing big sis look out for little sis.
Anonymous says
06/28/2019 at 1:48 pmMy littlest moved into the toddler room at daycare, which means that he now gets dropped off in the “big room” with all the kids other than the infants. My 4-year-old has been watching out for him and teaching him about all the new toys he can play with. He is so proud!
HSAL says
06/28/2019 at 9:36 amToday is my last day at work – I’ve transferred contacts, emptied my office of almost everything, saved and sent documents to the appropriate people, said goodbye to the copy guy…am I forgetting anything?
Emma says
06/28/2019 at 9:42 amIf you had any personal passwords saved on your work computer, you might want to erase those. Also, happy last day! give yourself some time to process if necessary.
Buddy Holly says
06/28/2019 at 10:03 am+1. Think about anything on your work computer that you would need and transfer it. (Obviously, only info that is yours and not anything that should stay with your company). Things like an old email draft that you use and copy all the time, your calendar appointments, a saved article.
Connect with any colleagues that you want to keep in touch with on LinkedIn, if you use it. Maybe put a calendar reminder to reach out to them in a few weeks or months.
Just in case your work doesn’t take care of it right away, set up out of office replies on your email and voicemail.
Next week, write thank you notes or emails to everyone you can think of that was connected to your old company. Let them know you appreciated them as a mentor, colleague, boss, whatever.
Anonanonanon says
06/28/2019 at 9:44 amI’ve missed that you are leaving your job, are you going to another one?
Do you need to leave any kind of transition document? It sounds like you’ve already transferred most of your stuff, but if you’re leaving a position they’re going to fill it might not hurt to leave behind a list of who has what (Contacts transferred to Jane, Files necessary to complete X audit were sent to Jack…etc.)
How big is your organization? Do people usually send goodbye emails? Most places I’ve worked people send a cursory email about how nice it was to work with everyone, where they’re going next, “Please stay in touch here is my linkedin” etc.
Quadruple check your drawers for stuff you found useful but the next person won’t (plastic silverware, sauce packets, random business cards, etc.)
Other than that, enjoy! I hope you’re off to a great adventure!
HSAL says
06/28/2019 at 11:00 amYep! I unexpectedly got an offer to work part-time, closer to my house, for almost the same pay! I love my job but couldn’t turn it down. It’ll be a big change but some good new experience, so I’m excited.
Transition stuff is taken care of as well as it can be. But oooh, good call on my silverware drawer. I remember finding it gross when the person before me left that type of stuff behind.
Buddy Holly says
06/28/2019 at 11:09 amWow, congratulations!
DLC says
06/28/2019 at 10:54 amClean out your email. I once took over a job from someone and was given access to their email account in case I needed to reference any paperwork or procedures, and there were definitely some emails in there that I would rather not have seen- nothing personal, but some rather catty/ frustrated exchanges about co-workers. Which I guess is not terrible, but it didn’t put anyone in the best light.
Anonymous says
06/28/2019 at 12:02 pmYes, in my company, your supervisor can request access to your email and files for continuity after you leave. Our instant messaging program auto-saves transcripts and stores in the email system, as well. I so appreciated the one employee I had who put relevant stuff into folders, then deleted everything else.
Anon says
06/28/2019 at 1:31 pmI’m a lawyer, so I generally don’t put anything in a work email that I wouldn’t want to be read aloud in a deposition.
rosie says
06/28/2019 at 2:50 pmYes, I’d assume that your employer can access your work email at any time. Maybe it’s more likely after you leave if they are looking for something, but I always have zero expectation of privacy for work email/slack/etc.
IHeartBacon says
06/28/2019 at 4:10 pm+ Infinity.
Wanderlust says
06/28/2019 at 10:57 amOoh… clear your cache and “web history” on your web browser
Anonanonanon says
06/28/2019 at 9:53 amHow do you go about finding a therapist for a child? Do I start with the pediatrician? What if there are no behavioral problems, does that change how I approach this?
Background: My 9 yo son’s biological father is in the Reserves and has taken a job that requires a lot of travel out of the country. In both cases, he is not great about communicating his travel schedule to us in advance. Now that my son is older, it’s starting to impact him more. He says it’s not even about missing his dad, but that he really doesn’t like expecting one thing, and then finding out last minute it’s going to be something different. I completely understand that, because I’m the same way. He now sees his father maybe one weekend every 6-8 weeks. Last time his father has promised an early birthday celebration, and all he did was pay for an upgrade to one of his video games. Not even an ice cream cone (and this is a kid that values celebrations more than gifts).
I’ve noticed now that he seems to have this constant baseline of disappointment and, as a result, small inconveniences really upset him. For example, he had a WONDERFUL day at summer camp yesterday (they went to medeival times! They swam in the pool! etc.) BUT because of the heat in our area, they didn’t play outside in the late afternoon. He let that one small change/disappointment cloud his whole day. He was almost in tears when he told me. This was formerly out of character for him and seems like a disproportionate reaction in an otherwise good ady?
If someone were to ask me what I was hoping to get out of taking him to a therapist I’d say I have two goals. 1. To make sure there’s not something larger and more sinister going on in his life that we don’t know about. 2. If there’s not, to help learn the tools and coping skills to deal with small disappointments and last-minute changes without it ruining his whole day.
Thoughts? Advice? similar experiences? Am I going about this the right way?
Anon says
06/28/2019 at 10:00 amYes, start with the pediatrician. Sorry your ex is such a turd.
Ifiknew says
06/28/2019 at 10:00 amNo advice but you are such a good and thoughtful mom from the way you are approaching this. Your son is so lucky to have you. Hugs
Anonymous says
06/28/2019 at 10:12 am+1. I would also start with the pediatrician but haven’t been through this.
Anonymous says
06/28/2019 at 10:19 am+1 you are doing an amazing thing by seeking out a therapist for your son. I’m sure you already have, but definitely talk to your husband about this. My husband is in the reserves too on top of a demanding FT+ job and it’s hard on all of us. DD is only 2 but misses daddy every time he’s away.
Anonanonanon says
06/28/2019 at 10:31 amUnfortunately, it’s my ex, he’s frequently out of the country with no way to contact him other than email which he rarely responds to. My son has always handled deployments well, but now that regular visits are interrupted at seemingly random intervals with little-to-no notice, it’s having a lot more of an impact.
Here’s a great example of the current level of communication: “Do you have training this weekend? I have on my calendar that you will be out of town for training but wanted to make sure I was right” “No, training is two weekends from now” “Oh ok, I see I have that down too, I must have made a mistake, thanks!” (fast forward a few days) “Still good to pick up (son) at 5 today?” “no, I’m out of town” “Oh. When I checked, you said you didn’t have training this weekend” “I don’t. I’m out of town for work.” “OK well for the future, I don’t actually care WHY you’re out of town or what you’re doing, I care about IF you’re out of town” “Got it”
So Anon says
06/28/2019 at 10:57 amA practical suggestion: Can you use an app like our family wizard to help your ex be clear about his parenting responsibilities?
Irish Midori says
06/28/2019 at 10:24 amYes, and props to you for looking out for his mental as well as physical health. Your ped should have some names, or also a lot of times the school counselor keeps a list and knows resources specifically for kids. The office may keep those contacts even in the summer or not mind you contacting the school counselor to ask.
So Anon says
06/28/2019 at 10:55 amThis is so tough, and I commend you for finding support for your son. I’m in a similar – but not the same – boat: my ex is inconsistent and parenting is not his priority. It is incredibly frustrating for me and heartbreaking to watch the impact on my kids. Starting with your pediatrician is a great idea; the school may also have recommendations. My son has seen a play therapist, and his OT now functions as his therapist as well in that she helps him find words to communicate and helps him process his emotions. Good luck!
mascot says
06/28/2019 at 11:27 amThis probably won’t help now because it is summer, but the school (teachers or administration) might be a good place to ask for referrals. We’ve got a school counselor and she’s great for stuff like this, either as a stand alone or in addition to an outside therapist. I think everyone can benefit from little extra therapeutic support from time to time, including kids.
IHeartBacon says
06/28/2019 at 4:27 pmI don’t have any specific recs, but I think other folks here have given you some good suggestions.
As for your question about whether you are going about this issue the right way, all I will say (so that I don’t out myself or my family) is that YES you are doing your son such a kindness by offering him someone else to talk to. You will never regret it and something good is guaranteed to come out of it: you will either learn that everything is okay or you will learn that something is wrong and you’ve taken the first step toward helping. You will *never* regret it.
One suggestion I have is to try finding a male therapist. Given your son’s age, he’ll probably feel more comfortable talking about boy-problems with a man.
Anonymous says
06/28/2019 at 12:19 pmI am pregnant, and I have a friend who keeps indicating she’d love to come visit me in the hospital when I have the baby. She has mentioned that she felt very honored when another friend invited her to see her baby in the hospital. This will be my first, and I’m kind of expecting the hospital experience to be chaotic and not my ideal time to welcome visitors. Thoughts?
Anon says
06/28/2019 at 12:30 pmI would just tell her that you’d like the hospital time to just be immediate family, and you’ll love to host her at X point at home. If she’s a good friend, she’ll get it. I will say that I’m a private person so i totally understand not wanting a crush of visitors immediately, but in some ways the hospital is the easiest place to entertain because you have nurses to help with the baby and you don’t have to clean up your house or be a hostess. It’s actually a lot less chaotic than home. Just my two cents. But you should do what you are comfortable with.
MNF says
06/28/2019 at 12:34 pmIt’s hard to know what you’ll want until it happens — there’s no way to know how birth will go and what your reaction will be. I would say that you’re limiting visitors to immediate family in the hospital. If you change your mind, you can always invite her later. We had all four grandparents (our parents) the morning after my (evening) c-section and it was a lot. I did ask my best friend to visit, but it was on day 3.
Anonymous says
06/28/2019 at 12:38 pmWe waited until we were home from the hospital to tell anyone other than immediate family about the birth. My parents are the only in-town family so they were the only ones who visited.
lsw says
06/28/2019 at 12:46 pmI personally didn’t want anyone other than my husband. Birth was such a private experience for me. My parents and his parents visited us when we were home (which was about 24 hours after birth; we were at our midwife center which while a medical facility is not a hospital). I think it’s more than fair to say you don’t know what you want yet (if you aren’t sure) or to say you want to keep it to just family if you do know for sure. I wouldn’t commit to anything because your feelings may change.
Lana Del Raygun says
06/28/2019 at 12:46 pmThoughts about how to wave off visitors, or about whether it will actually be as chaotic as you’re picturing? I really liked having hospital visitors and thought it was very relaxed. There’s basically nothing to do in the hospital except feed the baby and eat food that other people bring you, so I was bored out of my skull. If you want to keep the option open I would say something like “Oh, I don’t know if I’ll be up to having visitors so soon.”
Lana Del Raygun says
06/28/2019 at 12:48 pmI should probably add that I was in the hospital for 3 days; if you go home sooner than that you’ll probably be less bored and maybe still more stressed from the actual birth.
NYCer says
06/28/2019 at 1:26 pmI liked having visitors in the hospital too, but I was also there three nights. If you’re uncertain, just tell her that now… You’d rather play it by ear and see how you’re feeling after the baby arrives!
Anonymous says
06/28/2019 at 12:48 pmSome hospitals restrict visitors during flu season, which is a handy thing to point out to people who may want to visit.
rosie says
06/28/2019 at 12:55 pmI don’t think this has to be a big conversation if you don’t want it to be. Just deflect by seeing “we’ll see how we’re all feeling, but we are looking forward to you meeting our baby one way or the other.” And then don’t tell her when you’re in labor.
My parents & siblings visited in the hospital, and that was fine. I texted a few close friends who were out-of-town and then sent a broader announcement via email once we were home from the hospital. If you do have people visit, it should be people who understand they need to step out (or you are comfortable kicking out) if you need to be examined, work with a LC, etc. And it was a little hard for me to get in and out of bed, etc. because of soreness. I’d suggest bringing a dark colored cotton bathrobe to throw on for when you get up (otherwise I was in the camp of wearing hospital-provided things to reduce my laundry burden).
Anonymous says
06/28/2019 at 1:05 pmI think deflecting with “we’ll see how we’re all feeling” is not a bad way to couch it, but it may not be that chaotic. I had a couple of friends visit the first time and it was kind of nice. In a way, easier than at home (I didn’t have to feel like I needed to pick up before they came in) and there was an expectation that the visit would be brief. I had a pretty non-traumatic V delivery though, and other than being tired, the first couple of days (until I got home and my hormone levels plummeted) were pretty chill. I was appropriately medicated, the baby was exhausted and just wanted cuddles, and seeing some close friends was a nice perk. And they brought food! Keep an open mind…
Anonymous says
06/28/2019 at 1:17 pmSame here. Some friends – the couple we were having dinner with the night before an hour before I realized I was in labor – came by in the morning. I think they were the first ones to meet the baby, even before my mom, who was still driving from out of state. They didn’t stay long, but it was nice to see some friendly faces, and they brought food and a little gift if I remember right.
It’s totally OK if you don’t want visitors at the hospital, but a wait and see approach gives you the flexibility to change your mind.
Anonymous says
06/28/2019 at 1:38 pmI had the opposite experience after my vbirth. I had the baby in late evening and was permitted maybe two hours of sleep that night. For the remainder of my stay, I was forced to nurse every three hours. I was sweaty and starving and sleep-deprived and desperately wanted to shower and fix my hair. I deeply, deeply resented my husband for insisting that we let our parents visit, and I still find it painful to look at the photos of my beaming family holding the baby while I look on, exhausted and bedraggled.
anon says
06/28/2019 at 1:25 pmAn extra little tip: please do not encourage people to visit you in the hospital if you do not in fact want to greet visitors. I completely, 100% understand if you do not want visitors in the hospital. I do not understand encouraging people to visit and then banishing them to the waiting room with all of your family while you breastfeed…which is basically all the time (or takes an hour plus).
This is totally not fair to lump on you, but I had a friend actually do this to me. If you don’t want visitors, totally cool, I would way rather send you flowers and see you later when you’re ready to actually see me! Long answer short, if you’re not sure you want visitors, that is totally okay to say.
Sorry, sorry, venting from past hurtful experience with a selfish (now ex) friend. Hugs and congrats on the baby! Don’t let anyone pressure you to do anything you don’t feel comfortable with and definitely just say so if you aren’t sure yet.
Anonymous says
06/28/2019 at 1:40 pmWhy didn’t you just leave when it was time to feed the baby? Why wait around? A hospital visit really only needs to last a few minutes.
anon says
06/28/2019 at 5:41 pmHer husband met me at the door and asked me to wait with their families in the waiting room. I waited 20 mins, left the flowers with her family and left. I never planned to do anything more than hand over the flowers and smile and wave to new mom. I certainly didn’t plan to stay and chat! The point is to say hello, give a wave or a hug, and leave.
In response to below comments, I completely understand her not wanting to nurse in front of others, which is why I typically don’t go to the hospital. I was trying to indulge her because she specifically asked that I come–that morning, the day after the baby was born.
This was not the incident that made me think she was a selfish–at all–but her later behavior colors all previous encounters at this point–which is now obvious. Comment was a vent, and I apologize to OP for that. Point of the whole thing was, just tell people what you want. I felt like an intruder when I in fact had simply done what she asked.
anon says
06/28/2019 at 5:44 pmReally, y’all, I promise–I want her to ask for what she wants, including changing her mind! Sorry to have shared.
Anonymous says
06/28/2019 at 1:55 pmAre you seriously annoyed because your friend didn’t want an audience while she tried to get the hang of nursing? I didn’t nurse in front of anyone for the first few weeks until I got the hang of it.
A hospital visit for a mom with a newborn should be like 10-15mins tops. Unless the mom is specifically asking you to stay longer and chat. She’s either nursing, trying to nurse, sleeping or trying to sleep. She doesn’t want to chat with you for an hour.
Anon says
06/28/2019 at 2:09 pmYou sound way more selfish than your ex friend. If a new mom is uncomfortable nursing in front of other people, it’s no big deal for her to excuse herself (or ask them to excuse themselves, especially if she’s in the hospital and can’t really leave the room). If you feel like waiting, wait. If you don’t, congratulate her again and leave. Nobody expects a hospital visit with a new mother to last for hours.
ElisaR says
06/28/2019 at 2:17 pmeek. I don’t mean to pile on but you are the one that sounds like that bad friend here.
GCA says
06/28/2019 at 1:39 pmIt depends – it may not be as chaotic as you expect. I had a couple of close friends visit us in the hospital with our first. After the first day or so I was just tired, baby was placid and sleepy, and it was nice to see them and hang out. And yes, they brought food!
Long time lurker says
06/28/2019 at 2:18 pmI had two friends make these overtures myself. I had a c section and was an unshowered mess leaking blood everywhere. I just said no I don’t feel up to it maybe in a couple weeks. One friend still pushed. I was kind of surprised this is a thing ..
Anonymous says
06/28/2019 at 3:34 pmThanks, all! It’s definitely good to hear that hospital visitors might actually be fine, and I’ll keep my options open for now.
Anonymous says
06/28/2019 at 12:54 pmAny suggestions for a sage green paint color that would work well in a little girl’s nursery? Trying to avoid something too dark or too teal. TIA!
Anonymous says
06/28/2019 at 1:00 pmyes! I have this in my daughter’s room. It’s so fresh and peaceful.
Anonymous says
06/28/2019 at 1:26 pmDo you by any chance remember the paint name?
Anonymous says
06/28/2019 at 1:51 pmI can check at home and post back next week. I know we have extra in the basement for touch ups. It was from the Benjamin Moore Natura line.
Anon2 says
06/28/2019 at 1:37 pmWe have BM Guilford Green in our nursery. Make sure to test it first – it looks great in the nursery, but seemed dull in the kitchen (different lighting, etc).
rosie says
06/28/2019 at 1:17 pmThis fall will be the first time we have to send my toddler with a lunch that won’t be refrigerated or heated. Suggestions for lunchboxes? I was looking at the packit (or whatever that one is called that you put in the freezer and the whole thing is an ice pack), but I’m not sure if it makes sense because I anticipate we’ll have to send warm food in a thermos sometimes. Although we want to get her eating more sandwiches & maybe she can eat leftovers like tortellini cold, right now her lunch is almost always heated before eating (open to pescetarian ideas on this front as well). I have a neoprene lunchbox myself, and I probably need a new one, but it doesn’t seem like it keeps things that cold. Thanks!
Spirograph says
06/28/2019 at 1:45 pmThis is the situation with elementary school lunches, and I just bought a whatever insulated lunchbox. I’ll often pack it in the evening and leave it in the fridge overnight, then put the ice pack in in the morning.
Anonymous says
06/28/2019 at 1:55 pmI do this but skip the ice pack. Not ideal for food safety but this is an area where i live dangerously.
Anonymous says
06/28/2019 at 1:52 pmWe just pack cold things for our toddler (including dinner leftovers) and it works fine.
Anon says
06/28/2019 at 1:27 pmMy 15 month old daughter’s daycare provides lunch and two snacks, but she has refused to eat anything they provide. She is picky at home, but not out of the range of normal I don’t think, and I’m not sure why she’s completely refusing to eat anything there – she has been there for two weeks now and otherwise seems to be adjusting really well. The school officially prohibits parents from sending in food, but they are making an exception for us, since we all (daycare teachers, us, pediatrician) agree it’s unhealthy for my daughter to go from 8-5 with zero calories (which she has proven she will do, rather than eat daycare food). However, for allergy reasons they’re requiring that all food be store bought and in sealed containers. Besides string cheese, individual servings of yogurt and baby food jars/pouches, what ideas do you have?
CCLA says
06/28/2019 at 1:40 pmSome sort of individually wrapped whole grain to round out the dairy and pouch. Solidarity. DD was in an in-home daycare for almost a year until a few weeks ago, starting just before age 2, where the owner prepared healthy meals. She is a super picky eater, and refused to eat there other than the afternoon fresh fruit and crackers, and just ate huge breakfasts and dinners at home. We gave in after a month and sent food. Daycare owner said in ten years of doing this no one had refused her food…I keep telling myself at least she’s good against peer pressure? We ended up sending yogurt, fruit/veggie pouch, and a slice of whole grain bread (they didn’t require pre-packaged), which was her lunch every day for months.
rakma says
06/28/2019 at 1:43 pmFruit cups packed in juice, nutri-grain type bars, tuna pouches?
Do they have a microwave? Would those individual cups of rice or mac and cheese be doable? Oatmeal that just needs hot water?
If there’s something she reliably eats, search jet or amazon for bulk packages of individual servings.
Anon says
06/28/2019 at 1:52 pmMy kiddo hates string cheese but will eat the white cheddar cracker barrel cheese sticks (apparently she’s a cheese snob). We also do applesauce pouches. Someone (one of the big names, I don’t remember who) makes individual containers of vegetables (packed in water with a smidge of salt I think), like the fruit cups. You can heat or eat room temp. I think I’ve served kiddo corn, green beans, diced carrots and peas that way. Kiddo also likes the fruit cups (packed in juice) of mandarin oranges and (less so) diced pears. I think my husband found in the deli section single-serve roll-ups – if they’re willing to cut them for her, that might be an option for some meat and carbs. Pre-packaged crackers in single-servings might be fun for her too.
Anon says
06/28/2019 at 1:54 pmDepending on how well she’s eating or chewing and whether they will cut for her, I wonder if any pre-packaged single serve salads would tempt her from a vegetables front. At least a Mexican one would have some black beans and shredded cheese in it.
Anon says
06/28/2019 at 2:06 pmI think this actually touches on an issue. She bites and chews really well and at home she loves to eat big pieces of things and take bites out of them. But at school they have a policy that they cut everything into microscopic pieces and I think it annoys her. I know that sounds ridiculous, but I really think there’s an element of her thinking this food is beneath her because it’s cut so small.
AnotherAnon says
06/28/2019 at 1:52 pmWhat do they serve at school? And what does she eat at home? Did she wean recently? Do they give cow’s milk or allow you to bring it in? When my kiddo was this age I was giving him too much cow’s milk and then he’d refuse to eat solid food. My suggestions would be: apple slices with pb, cheerios, Goldfish, but I’m assuming they already offer those types of snacks. You could also try: pb sandwiches, mac n cheese, or pizza. Basically anything that is her favorite food to eat normally. I use the word favorite loosely – it changes daily.
Anon says
06/28/2019 at 2:02 pmThe menu changes frequently but every day they offer some kind of grain, fruit, veg and meat. Some things they serve I know she doesn’t like, but there are definitely multiple things served every day that she “should” like. I think she is just flipping out because the food doesn’t look/taste exactly the way it does when we serve it? I don’t really know. I get that school mac n cheese or turkey sandwiches might be a little different than the version of those foods we serve, but for the life of me I don’t know why a school strawberry is not as good as a home strawberry. She eats plenty of solids at home and will eat anything we send to school, so the issue is very much just with the school’s food.
They give milk at every meal but unfortunately she does not drink milk (at home or school), which is the main reason everyone’s concerned about her not eating. The ped said she doesn’t need to be eating solids well at school, but she needs calories in some form.
rosie says
06/28/2019 at 2:01 pmHappy Tot has a spinach/apple bar that is supposed to be good for fiber and protein that my toddler likes.
Maybe also packages of peanut butter crackers (or cheese sandwich crackers if PB is not allowed). You can get packages of precut fruit, like apples.
SC says
06/28/2019 at 3:01 pmFor fruit and vegetables, some stores sell small bags of apple slices (or apple “fries”) and small bags of baby carrots. Also, individual cups or pouches of applesauce. If there’s a cereal she likes, you could try getting individual cups of that cereal. Do oranges and bananas count as “sealed”?
My 18-mo niece had a chocolate chip Clif Z-bar this weekend, and she liked it. My 4 year old tried it and went nuts for it, so I bought some at Target and am throwing them into his lunch this week.
Speaking of Target, I was surprised at how many pre-packaged, single-serve foods Target had available, at least compared to my usual grocery stores and Costco. They had pretty much everything that’s been suggested here–fruit cups, various bars, pouches, crackers, cereals, etc.
Anon says
06/28/2019 at 3:13 pmThanks all, sounds like I need to go to Target this weekend.
Lawyermom says
06/28/2019 at 7:52 pmFor pouches Costco brand has organic applesauce a 24 pack for $10 and has organic fruit and vegetables pouches for the same price.
CHL says
06/28/2019 at 4:53 pmMight be too late, but you might want to think about not making home sent food too enticing (like send plain oatmeal every day or something.) I get not wanting her to go without food, but if there’s a better option on the table, why would she ever come around to the daycare food. Signed, someone who was once (kind of) there…
Anon says
06/28/2019 at 5:47 pmThanks, yeah, that makes sense.
Anonymous says
06/28/2019 at 2:37 pmHere’s my laugh of the week: https://www.mcsweeneys.net/articles/my-three-month-olds-guide-to-sleep-training-your-parents