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Here’s an interesting question we think will make for a great discussion: What do your kids call their grandparents? Did you stick with tradition or go with something unusual? Did your parents and in-laws agree with whatever you suggested, or did they pick their own names? What did/do you call your own grandparents?
I think I first heard of the not-calling-grandparents-grandparents trend in 2011 when I read a New York Times story called “Who Are You Calling Grandma?” and learned that some grandmothers, feeling that Grandma sounds too old, have instead labeled themselves as Glam-ma, Mimi, Mamo, and so on. Of course, some grandfathers pick alternate names, too, but it seems more common among women, and the grandmothers’ picks in the article are definitely more … unusual. (The article does mention reasonable, practical reasons to use non-standard names, such as remarriages, etc.) Last year, the Times did a similar story, which included an, er, interesting anecdote about a 69-year-old grandmother who refused to accept her daughter’s gift of a “grandma” charm for her charm bracelet. She said she was too old for the nickname and instead requested Sweetie Pie (um).
Here are some thoughts from the moms on the Corporette team:
Kat
When I was little we called the grandparents who lived close Pop-Pop and Gram, and the grandparents who lived far Grandma Vogele and Grandpa Vogele. When it came time for us to pick names for my child’s grandparents, I didn’t like the level of formality associated with last names — I wanted Grandma and Grandpa to be fun! So in full, we call everyone Grandma Linda and Grandma Ann, but in practice just Grandma in person. The grandpas are Grandpa and Grandad. When my grandmother was living, she wanted to be called GG for great-grandma. Not terribly creative but it works for us!
Kate
I called my maternal grandparents (who lived near us) Gramma and Grampa, while my paternal grandparents (who lived in Cyprus) were Yiayia and Papou, the Greek words for grandparents. (Incidentally, I got my name, Katina, from my grandmother.) When my son was born, my husband’s parents, who are Chinese, became Ma Ma and Ye Ye, and my parents were Yiayia and Papou — but when my mom realized that two Y-words for grandparents might be confusing to a little kid, she switched herself to Gramma (like her mom). If my son has kids, I’ll be happy being Grandma/Gramma, and I will certainly not ask to be called Glam-ma.
April
In my experience looking at families around me, it seems as if the firstborn grandchild sets the names of the grandparents. In my family, my nephew, who was the firstborn grandchild, couldn’t say Grandpa and could only say Papa, so even though we all assumed/intended he would be Grandpa, he is now forever known as Papa. On that side, my mother-in-law is Bubbie. For my parents, my mother is Grandma, and that’s what I called her mother. My father started off as Poppy, which I love, but lately he’s been trying to transition to Grandpa for some unknown reason. I thought Poppy was cute and suited him, but it is easier to distinguish between Papa and Grandpa vs. Papa and Poppy.
So, readers, do tell: What do your kids call their grandparents, and why? Did this issue cause any family disagreements? What do you want to be called if you have grandkids someday?
Stock photo via Stencil.
ALC says
LOL my in-laws have already informed us what they’d like to be called instead of Grandma and Grandpa (they went with something like Mimi and Pop). I’m fine with it, I just think it’s funny.
Anon says
Mimi is so weird to me! I know it’s common but like, it’s a woman’s name. It doesn’t seem that different than asking your grandkids to call you Susan when your name is Caitlin or whatever.
AwayEmily says
Actual lol at this, such a good point.
Mimi says
My MIL is a Michelle, so she’s Mimi. Doesn’t bother me in her case.
Anon says
We called my grandmother Mimi. She chose that because it was what my grandfathers beloved grandmother was called. Now my aunt goes by Mimi with her grandkids.
None of these people’s real names have anything to do with Mimi, it’s just always been a grandmother name in our family. My aunt being called Mimi certainly isn’t newfangled, since my great great grandmother went by it in the 1920s!
Anon says
We had the first grandkid, so we got to choose. Kiddo isn’t talking yet but has name recognition so hopefully they will stick. My parents are Grammy and Papa and my inlaws are GG and Grandpa. There was a lot of discussion before baby was born and a lot of angst about choosing names.
Tryingnottobefrumpyintheburbs says
Threadjack! I have a sizeable Jcrew merchandise credit to burn. Anyone have any recent, favorite items from there?
Ducky says
I love the 365 stretch t-shirts. They look good under a suit jacket and are so comfortable.
FVNC says
Grandma and Grandpa for both sets, distinguished by the states they live in (e.g., “Grandma and Grandpa from [state] are visiting this weekend!”). My in-laws are non-native English speakers and I suggested we call them by the names for grandparents in their first language, but they wanted “grandma and grandpa.”
Sasha says
Yeah, growing up as kids we did Grandma [Lastname] or Grandpa [Lastname] for all grandparents. Guess we just weren’t that creative…
Anon says
Poppy and Yaya for one set and Bunny and Gramps for the other
KJ says
My parents are relatively young and Grandma and Grandpa most definitely did not suit them when my daughter (their first grandkid) was born about a year and a half ago. We decided as a big family (I’m one of 5 kids) to call them Jen-Jen (my mom’s name is Jennifer) and Captain (my dad is a Captain in the USMC). :)
AwayEmily says
aw, that’s cute.
Anonymous says
I was shocked at how weird my parents got about this (I had the first grandkid for them). My mom debated FOREVER, and then settled on Grandma, claiming she couldn’t use Nana because that’s what my husband’s mother was called by all of her existing grandkids. My dad wanted Grandad, even though that is what his dad was called, and I can’t tell you how much the family hated that man- so it seemed like a weird choice. My daughter ended up calling him Grandpa, and I’ve largely encouraged that, although my SIL, once her son was born, wanted to stick with Grandad because her father was called Grandpa.
My BFF’s mom is called Foxy, which I think is weird. My mom toyed with Gigi but I’m glad she settled on Grandma.
Anon says
My mom felt strongly that she didn’t want to be “Grandma” or Bubbe (we are Jewish, and Bubbe is Yiddish for grandma) so we went with Grammy and Grandaddy for my dad. My in-laws don’t care, except my MIL also vehemently didn’t want to be Bubbe, so they are just Grandma and Grandpa. I don’t know why no one wanted Bubbe – I would love to be one some day!
shortperson says
i look forward to being bubbe too! since my jewish mom is dead my kids dont have a “bubbe” — they have nainai and yeye (paternal chinese)
Boston Legal Eagle says
Grandma and grandpa for my parents, who live near us and see our kids all the time. In-laws are either also grandma and grandpa, or “Other grandpa/other grandma” or “computer grandpa/computer grandma” (we online chat with them) :) Not sure what husband’s step-mom is – “computer step grandma”?
Anon says
Wow, “other grandma” or even “computer grandma” seems so cruel, like you are deliberately dismissing them as lesser grandparents. I would be so hurt if my grandchild called me that. You can’t use Grandma [Name] or Grandma [State Where They Live]?
Anonymous says
I’m due in January with my first and I’m really hoping our parents will simply go with Grandma FirstName and Grandpa Firstname and not want anything weird. I almost universally hate all other variations of grandparent “titles”.
AW says
My mom’s mom was Grandma. Her dad was Grandpa Ralph and his wife was Grandma Linda (but only to their faces, otherwise it was just Ralph and Linda). Dad’s parents were Bubbie and Grandpa.
Waiting on the first kiddo to pop out in November. I know my mom will be Grandma (dad’s gone already). We’re waiting to hear what my MIL will pick, likely either Nani (which is what her kids called her mother and incidentally what we called my great-grandmother) or Bubbie. I’ll defer to MIL on that, though I think my husband is hoping she’ll pick Bubbie since it’s more traditional. I’m guessing FIL will just be Grandpa but maybe Pop (what his kids call his father). Really it’s going to be whatever kiddo decides to call them though.
AwayEmily says
We have Omi and Opi on one side, and Nama and Grandpa on the other. All of these were organically chosen by the eldest grandchild on each side (not my kids).
Mary says
My parents went with Memere and Pepere (MEH-may, PEH-pay), which is French. My mom is from Maine, and we grew up calling her mom Memere, so it’s not strange to us. My husband’s parents are divorced and his dad remarried. His dad is Grandpa, his step mom is Grammy Pat, and his mom is Grandma (though she often tries to add her name as well). We don’t see any of the family much, so it’s hard to tell how well the names are sticking. Then again, my 5-yo called us by our first names recently and told us, “Sometimes I call you Mommy, and sometimes I call you Mary.”
Meh-may?! says
Oof, these northern New England b@stardizations of French words would kill me. Even though I have MA fam that do it :)
Lana Del Raygun says
My parents are Grandpapa and Poh-Poh (Chinese), and Mr Lana’s parents are Nana and ………….. somehow I don’t know what his father wants to be called and I feel like it’s too late to ask, help!
GCA says
My parents are Gong Gong and Poh Poh (also Chinese – maternal grandparents). Mr GCA’s parents are Grandma (firstname) and Grandpa (firstname), or just Grandma and Grandpa.
Anonymous says
We have Oma and Opa (German). But she often signs Oma First Name which I find strange.
My parents are Grandma and Grandad. My grandmothers were Nana and Nanny (British). Grandma is perceived by my mom to be ‘younger’ but I mostly think of it as American (we’re Canadian).
More common in our area are Nanny and Poppy or Nan and Pop. My DH is Papa and Papa is common for father in so many cultures (Russian, French, Turkish etc) that I’m always surprised when it’s used for a grandparent.
Katy says
My grandfather became “Papa” to his grandkids because “Nonno” (Italian) was too “scary” for us as toddlers. (Think man with white beard loudly saying Nono nono nono somewhat loudly / aggressively to make a point!) As the eldest grandkids, Papa was what we heard everyone calling him, including his youngest daughter who was still at home. One “branch” of cousins called him Grandpapa as they called their own dad Papa, but that never caught on with the other dozen of us.
For what is it worth…. I grew up with separate names for each my grandparents and great-grandparents) (Granny, Papa, Nana, Grandad, Dodie, Great Grandad, Nanny).
Our parents picked their names. My mom really wanted to be Nanny after her WONDERFUL grandmother. My kiddo now has Grandma, Grandpa, Nanny and Grandad and GG. My grandfather was christened GG when great grandad was too long for my nephew and he LOVES it.
Clementine says
We have Mimi and Papa, Oma and Opa (German version – that’s my dad and his wife… she suggested something bizarre and I had to redirect ASAP), and Grammy.
My MIL decided to rebrand herself with the second round of grandkids… there is a 12 year gap between my oldest 2 niblings and the youngest 5. She picked Mimi (which she occasionally spells Meme) for pronunciation reasons. My mom picked Grammy because that’s what she called her (very close to her) grandmother.
Sasha says
Out of curiosity, what was she rebranded from?
Clementine says
Grandma (firstname). It honestly doesn’t suit her – she is definitely a Mimi or a Nana or something… she does, in fact, make the BEST cookies.
Step-grandma actually hadn’t been assigned a grandparent name and actually signed something from ‘Big Red’ (she is a Plus Sized, red headed woman…) and my husband literally read it and said, ‘Shut. It. Down.’ Oma was a much better option.
Leatty says
My parents: Nana and Granddaddy. These are the same names I used for my mom’s mom, and my dad’s dad. If my mom’s mom hadn’t suddenly passed away when I was pregnant, I have no idea what my daughter would have called my mom since my mom was suggesting some…odd names.
My in-laws: Grandma and Grandpa. My MIL is German, so I assumed she would want to be called Oma, but she prefers Grandma and Granny)
ITLady says
Another oma and opa here… it was originally going to be just for my parents as our family is mostly German. I studied German all through middle and high school and was a couple classes short of a minor too in addition to doing an exchange program there.
My daughter though has taken to calling both grandparents Oma and Opa which we’re allowing for now as she can’t really say grandma and grandpa. My mom I think is a little disappointed by this as she had specifically asked for Oma, but its not like we can control it at the moment. We’ll see what happens in a few months/years!
EP-er says
We started with Grandma & Papa for my parents. (I disliked Papa, but my kids are last, so I didn’t have a say…) and Grandma for my husband’s mom. However, my oldest went through a “first name” phase. I ignored it, thinking it would go away. It didn’t. So, each grandma (& dad!) are known by their first name, many years later. I got to keep “Mom” and my dad kept “Papa.” Sometimes this comes out as “Grandma First Name” but usually not. My husband seems okay being called by his first name, at least with our oldest.
Anon says
Good for your husband! I went through a phase of trying to call my dad by his first name. He hated it and went ballistic. I get why he didn’t love it, but I also think he overreacted and it damaged our relationship (and as an adult I definitely think I would have gotten bored of this phase much sooner if he’d ignored it).
HSAL says
Grandparents choosing names grates me something crazy for some reason. My FIL wanted to be called Papa, and there are older grandchildren who use it, but I refuse to use it. It is my hill to die on. There are other issues with him, naturally, and it’s just a contributing factor. Everyone is Grandma and Grandpa, no one gets special names – I don’t think it matters that an older grandkid gave them a name.
anon says
Wow, we are really boring. Every grandparent is Grandma {First Name} or Grandpa {First Name}. I’ll admit it, I’m just not a fan of the cutesy grandparent names and I guess our parents aren’t, either.
Anonymous says
My mom felt very strongly about this and chose Grammy. My kids (her only grandkids) call her “Grandma” and she hates it (and they do it when she’s annoying them).
My dad didn’t care, so we went with Grandpa, but as it turns out my oldest fave him a nickname and it stuck.
My in-laws are Gran and Grandad; MIL chose Gran when the first grandkids on that side were born. One set of my grandparents are still alive, and we all call them Mimi and Papa. I was the kid that made “mimi” happen because I kept calling her “mama”.
LadyNFS says
My dad’s parents went by Papa(First Name) and Ma(first name). My dad has the same name as his father (and my daughter’s name is also a derivative of that same name), so my dad goes by Papa(first name), which was something that I wanted, as an homage to my grandfather, I suppose. It’s a bit odd in hindsight, because my husband also goes by Papa, and DD sees my parents constantly, so there’s a lot of “Papa! Papa(First Name)!” My mother wanted to be “Mema” (Mee-ma) but my daughter has christened her “Nanny-o.” In-laws that my daughter seldom sees are Grandpa (First name) and Grandma (first name). Incidentally, our nanny goes by “Nana” (a derivative of her name that is easier for a child to say). After we had said nanny for a little over 6 months, MIL informed us in a huff that she had always hoped to be called Nana herself, though she never bothered to communicate that to us. (eye roll). My mom’s parents were Grandma and Grandpa.
n says
The first grandchild picks. My niece was the first grandchild on both sides of her family. She started using “baba” as (according to my BIL) “her honorific for everyone over the age of 40” when she was talking a little bit but not a whole lot. It later morphed into “biba” for my mom, now used for all of. My husband’s parents were already grandma and grandpa by dint of older grandchildren / nieces on my husband’s side.
Anonymous says
My MIL requested “Nana” before my first kid was born, she was already using that name with my niece. My mom is Grandma. Both FIL and my dad are Grandpa, and we just specify mommy’s dad or daddy’s dad. We rarely see FIL, so there’s not much confusion.
My grandparents requested some diminutives, but habits are hard to break, so my kids still just call them great grandma and great grampa (even though that’s a mouthful)
lsw says
I’m from the Philly area so my parents are Mom Mom and Pop Pop. My husband’s parents are/were Grandma and Grandpa – he has a daughter from a previous marriage, so that’s what they were already. As a kid I liked having Grandma/Grandpa and Mom-mom/Pop-pop so that I didn’t have to say “Grandma Smith” and “Grandma Jones” so that’s why I resurrected it for my kids, even though we’re not in eastern PA anymore!
AttorneyM says
My mom is grandma Firstname; one set of in-laws is grandma and grandpa Lastname (feels very formal to me, but is fine); the other set is Mima and Papa. My MIL wanted it to be Mima and Pipa (pronounced Mee-Maw Pee-Paw) and even HE never referred to himself that way. I’m ok with it, but didn’t realize think about the fact that Mima would sound too close to “Mama” with a toddler learning to talk, which does kind of bother me. Just glad MIL stopped pushing Pipa because it was…uncomfortable. With three grandmas, I guess the distinction is helpful but it is a bit funny to me because I just called all grandparents grandma/grandpa (and one great grandma was Oma) and it was just fine. (As an aside, my mom thought about being “Oma,” but everyone called my great grandma Oma so it was just too tied to that specific Oma in our family.)
Inspired By Hermione says
Oldest grandchild here.
My grandma is Tutu, which happens to be Hawaiian for grandma, but really it’s because her name is Tudy.
My grandpa is Poppy. Who is now rebranding as “Pop,” much to my dismay.
Also, saw something recently: https://images.app.goo.gl/AarvmzGrq24NXhQQ9