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Happy MLK Day! I hope you and your littles have the day to yourselves, but in case you don’t, I thought I would do a post on The Caffeine Solution from The Ordinary, which I tried because readers were swearing by it. It’s extraordinarily affordable, and I like what it does for my puffy morning eyes. (It’s not as moisturizing as some products, but you just have to add another moisturizer on top of it, whether it’s your regular one or a special eye product.) Show me a mom who thinks her eyes don’t need some de-puffing and … actually, I don’t think that person exists. The Caffeine Solution is only $6.70 at Beautylish. The Ordinary Caffeine Solution
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Sales of note for 9.10.24
(See all of the latest workwear sales at Corporette!)
- Ann Taylor – 30% off your purchase
- Banana Republic Factory – Up to 50% off everything + extra 20% off
- Boden – 15% off new styles
- Eloquii – $29 and up select styles; up to 50% off everything else
- J.Crew – Up to 50% off wear-to-work styles; extra 30% off sale styles
- J.Crew Factory – 40-60% off everything; extra 60% off clearance
- Lands’ End – 30% off full-price styles
- Loft – Extra 40% off sale styles
- Talbots – BOGO 50% everything, includes markdowns
- Target – Car-seat trade-in event through 9/28 — bring in an old car seat to get a 20% discount on other baby/toddler stuff.
- Zappos – 26,000+ women’s sale items! (check out these reader-favorite workwear brands on sale, and some of our favorite kids’ shoe brands on sale)
Kid/Family Sales
- Carter’s – Birthday sale, 40-50% off & extra 20% off select styles
- Hanna Andersson – Up to 50% off all baby; up to 40% off all Halloween
- J.Crew Crewcuts – Extra 30% off sale styles
- Old Navy – 40% off everything
- Target – BOGO 25% off select haircare, up to 25% off floor care items; up to 30% off indoor furniture up to 20% off TVs
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And — here are some of our latest threadjacks of interest – working mom questions asked by the commenters!
- The concept of “backup care” is so stupid…
- I need tips on managing employees in BigLaw who have to leave for daycare pickup…
- I’m thinking of leaning out to spend more time with my family – how can I find the perfect job for that?
- I’m now a SAHM and my husband needs to step up…
- How can I change my thinking to better recognize some of my husband’s contributions as important, like organizing the shed?
- What are your tips to having a good weekend with kids, especially with little kids? Do you have a set routine or plan?
Anon says
I noticed this is out of stock at the link Kat posted (probably because it was so much cheaper than other s!tes). It is currently $14.59 and Prime at Amazon.
mascot says
Sephora recently started carrying The Ordinary’s products online only. Price is also $6.70 although it’s currently out of stock. You can also order it direct from Deciem even if it might take a few days to get there.
I’ve used this and like it, although my eyes have been puffier than normal lately. I blame too much over indulgence from the holidays.
AnonMom! says
Happy MLK day!
How do you make time for yourself? Especially on the weekend and especially with small children. I have a very demanding high energy toddler and I try to do the cooking for the week while she naps. I feel like that is all I do all weekend: cook, laundry, feed kiddo, clean after kiddo etc. Nanny takes care of his meals during the week. DH does grocery shopping. How do I organize myself and my time so that I way I get a few hours “off” on the weekend?
I already gave up manicures and workout. I cannot wait for the good weather to go outside with DD- that will be my exercise.
Please share any tips. Thanks!
EB0220 says
This is why doing meal prep and tons of laundry on the weekend doesn’t work for me. For laundry – I try to just run it continuously during the week, and then I spend 1-2 evenings during the week folding laundry while watching TV. For meal prep, I tend to try to fit it in during the week. For example, I might make dinner and then start something else for the next night in the Instant Pot while the kids are playing before bed. It’s not perfect but I personally prefer to keep the “work” confined within the workweek and relax more on the weekend. YMMV of course.
Anon says
I don’t have any tips because I couldn’t make it work when the kids were super small. Now that my youngest is 2, I’ve got some time back to myself. But some of my tips now might work for you…
– Join a gym with childcare. Mine doesn’t change diapers, and my kids loved to poop about 15 minutes into any workout I did. Now they can play, so I can get a full 45 minutes in, most times. I still only make it once during the week and maybe another time on the weekend though.
– Trade weekend mornings with DH. My kids get up at 6am, so we alternate Sat and Sun duties. I get up with them on Sat and have ownership til ~10am, then we join back up for family time the rest of the day. He does the same on Sundays. The non-duty parent gets to sleep in a bit, putter around, run personal errands, or just enjoy a mental break. My DH is going to go back to working weekends next month, and we’re both dreading the loss of this system.
– Stop watching TV and stop playing games on your phone. It sounds so dumb, but I felt like I had no time after the kids went to bed, until I realized I still had time to get to level 500 on Candy Crush over the last year or so, and was caught up on several shows. I deleted the app, stopped recording most shows, and now feel like I have SO MUCH more time. I was able to join a book club because now I have time to read after the kids get in bed and we get all the chores done.
Anon says
Oh yeah. And we do very little household prep on the weekend – it’s all during the week. I’d rather cook and laundry after kids go to bed on a Wed night than spend my precious Sunday mornings doing it. We even meal plan every Tues night and then trade off a grocery run every Wed night.
anne-on says
Trade off with your spouse. I’m the primary parent at home during the week, so my DH takes my son most weekends for classes/activities/etc. It is amazing just how MUCH you can get done in an hour with no kids around. Also – what is your partner doing during your kiddos naps? Either both of do chores during nap or neither of us does – you BOTH deserve a break during the day.
Otherwise – it sounds retro, but I have specific ‘chores’ to do every day. Friday/Saturday/Sunday nights I do 1 load of laundry so I don’t feel like it takes over my entire weekend – it is folded on the couch watching a show, Monday night I make dinner and an extra crockpot meal or prep tomorrow’s meal, Tuesday nights we all pick up for the cleaning crew and eat the crockpot meal, Wednesday I pop out to pick up more fresh fruit/veg and we have leftovers, Thursday we have a set ‘easy’ meal for kiddo so I can meal plan for the next week and I usually make something that is pretty hands off (like meat and veggies on a roasting pan), Friday is laundry and then date night, Saturday is groceries, and Sunday is for any other ‘big’ or unusual chores.
J says
I prefer to do some early morning work before everyone wakes up. For me that is work for my job which frees up some time later in the typical workday for working out. I also don’t do much during the weekend like previous posters.
Are you able to work from home or telecommute one day per week? You’d be able to get all of your laundry done do some crock pot meals while you work/meal prep over your lunch break, etc. It’s a life saver for me.
NewMomAnon says
This is not exactly what you asked but….I keep an informal time budget that follows the “biggest rocks first” philosophy (if you fill a vase with rocks, you should put the biggest rocks in first and let the little ones fill in the gaps – otherwise the little ones will densely fill the bottom and you won’t have room left for the big ones). I figure out my top priorities roughly every couple months, and make sure I have time for those things. Right now it’s a major law change, mindfully parenting kiddo through some big changes, decluttering/reorganizing my house, and re-establishing social connections after the holidays. Everything else is a small rock that fits into the gaps or doesn’t happen.
Laundry often fits around the decluttering; dinner is streamlined and simplified, or eaten with friends; picking up happens in the moment or not at all. Exercise happens with kiddo in tow (a walk to school, swimming, sprinting up and down the hallways) or with a friend. Downtime is spent texting far-away friends, following developments in the major law change, or planning the next big decluttering move. Except sometimes when its Candy Crush because…I’m human. And that’s OK too.
ANP says
I’ve been thinking about this a lot lately. My solutions:
+ Less time mindlessly surfing social media. Seriously. It eats up so. much. time!
+ Get up earlier — a few times a week I try to get up 45 minutes early to walk our dog before everyone else is up. It helps me feel more centered by giving me a brisk wakeup walk, I get to listen to my podcasts, etc. I’m in a much better spot, then, to manage the morning routine.
+ Pay for childcare — either at your gym, or hire a sitter for a few hours on a weekend to fit in that nail appointment or barre class. It’s an investment in your mental health and is totally worth it.
+ I try to, but am not always successful at, do laundry on weeknights. One less big weekend task.
+ Trade off “duty” with spouse so each of you get weekend downtime.
Anonymous says
Hey ladies…I returned from maternity leave and my old work schedule of 8:30-5:30 is just not working. I’m stuck in so much traffic and get home about 20 minutes before we put my daughter to bed. I want to ask to work 8-5 instead – there’s not as much traffic and I would have the option of being able to pick up my daughter from daycare (my husband will drop off and pick up since daycare is close to his work, but I would like to have the option every now and then to show my face), whereas I would never make it before daycare closes if I left at 5:30.
I have to ask my manager to adjust my schedule, but I’m a bit nervous about being shut down. When I started my job 2 years ago (pre-baby), my coworker and I asked to change our schedule to 7:30-4:30 or at least 8-5, but we were shut down and told to stick to the schedule. Over time, my coworker has shifted her schedule to her liking (actually coming in later and leaving around 5:15) and my manager hasn’t said anything, but I’m too much of a rule follower to just switch my schedule without asking again. I feel as though the circumstances have changed now that I have a kid and need to get home. He doesn’t have any kids, so I don’t know how understanding he is of that. To add to this, another girl on the team works 7:30-4:30 “because she has kids”, so why can’t I? I hated when parents got to make their own rules in the workplace and vowed to never do that, but now I understand why that needs to happen – my baby needs to be fed and as long as I put in the time and get my work done, what does it matter? Any advice?
EB0220 says
This sounds very unreasonable to me if you’re a salaried employee. Nevertheless, if you really want to stay there – it would help to know the reasoning behind the schedule. Why is 8:30 – 5:30 “required” (of some people)? What is your organization’s policy? Any reason you can’t complete your work if you’re there 8-5? My company has a little-known “core hours” policy but allows some flexibility around that schedule. My best advice – be straightforward, keep details to a minimum and present a plan to mitigate any inconvenience caused by the shift in schedule.
mascot says
Is there a business reason that someone needs to be there until 5:30, whether those are external or internal people that need to be able to reach you? Be prepared to address that. Can you propose this on a trial basis? Or, can you do this x days a week- maybe even switching off with another co-worker if having someone there until 5:30 is necessary.
Unfortunately, the reality of babies/toddlers is that they go to bed early. It gets better as they get older. In the meantime, focus on quality time over quantity. Can you spend more time with her in the mornings? On weekends?
Anon says
I would just switch it myself, but I’m a little thrown by his rejection 2 years ago though. Are you in the type of job where the team needs specific coverage? What is the reason you need to stick to a schedule?
Although I hate to do it, I would play the kid card. I would say is something like “Now that I have kids, it’s my understanding that my schedule can shift. I’d like to do 8-5 because currently I’m not making it home before daycare closes. Do you see any issues with that change?” If he pushes back but doesn’t have a specific reason, you could suggest a trial period or limited days – maybe you could do 8-5 on M/W/F only. Or maybe you could do it full time for 2-4 weeks and then meet with him to reassess how it’s going and brainstorm solutions to anything falling through the cracks.
Pogo says
The only time I had a manager shut me down like this, it was because he was really big on face time and access (so if he had a question, I would physically be at my desk to answer it for him). Is it something like that? In which case, I’d explain how you will be reachable otherwise (phone, email, IM, etc). Especially since it’s just a half hour shift, I think that’s reasonable.
I’m sorry you’re in this situation. I leave at 4:30 and still feel like I barely see my kiddo!
anon says
Small rant: I posted a comment on Facebook about wrestling my three year old into her car seat and it devolved into a bunch of middle aged women arguing about whether or not spanking is a good thing. I didn’t even mention spanking in my original post. I’m so irritated I half want to delete the whole thread. They should just all be grateful that they got to parent without everything they did being picked apart on social media.
NewMomAnon says
Delete it!!! Give yourself the headspace for something more important. Or can you just unfollow that thread? It’ll go away in a couple days.
Anon says
Are you snarky enough that you could get away with that reply to their comments? “Whoa, this is not at all what I intended with my post! All of you are lucky you got to parent without your every action being picked apart on social media.”
Or what I would want to post: “Seems like, for you, the spanking didn’t work for discouraging bad behavior in public. Maybe try a time out before you get back on Facebook?”
EB0220 says
Ugh. This is why I only admit to my parenting struggles with a glass of wine in someone’s kitchen….super annoying.
Anon says
I’m a mom who thinks her eyes don’t need some de-puffing. It has never even occurred to me that puffy eyes are a thing, unless someone has been bawling for hours on end, and in that situation depuffing eyes would be the last thing on my mind.