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I have apparently missed the blogger memo that went around: I’m not usually a stripes girl. While there are occasionally fun stripey blazers I like, I’m just not someone who considers a Breton shirt a “must have.” But: This boatnecked version from Talbots does look nice — a bit more Jackie O / Audrey than I normally think of a stripey shirt. (Oooh, and buttons up the back!) The machine washable shirt is available in black/white and blue/white stripes for $89.50 for regular sizes; it also comes in sizes for petites, plus sizes, and plus size petites. Talbots Portrait-Collar Top (L-2)Sales of note for 4.18.24
(See all of the latest workwear sales at Corporette!)
- Ann Taylor – 50% off full-price dresses, jackets & shoes; $30 off pants & skirts; extra 50% off sale styles
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And — here are some of our latest threadjacks of interest – working mom questions asked by the commenters!
- If you’re a working parent of an infant with low sleep needs, how do you function at work when you’re in the throes of baby’s sleep regression?
- Should I cut my childcare down to 12 hours a month if I work from home?
- Will my baby have speech delays if we raise her bilingual?
- Has anyone given birth in a teaching hospital?
- My child eats everything, and my friends’ kids do not – how should I handle? In general, what is the best way to handle when your child has some skill/ability and your friend’s child doesn’t have that skill/ability?
- ADHD moms, give me your tips to help with things like behavior in the classroom, attention to detail, etc?
- I think I suffer from mom rage…
- My husband and kids are gone this weekend – how should I enjoy my free time?
- I’m struggling to be compassionate with a SAHM friend who complains she doesn’t have enough hours of childcare.
- If you exclusively formula fed, what tips do you have for in the hospital and coming home?
- Could I take my 4-yo and 8-yo on a 7-8 day trip to Paris, Lyon, and Madrid?
Sleep says
I slept great throughout my whole pregnancy until I hit 37 weeks and now I randomly have insomnia. It’s not that I have difficulty getting comfortable (other than some pelvic pressure I haven’t had much problems there), I just wake up for random 1-2 hour stints and can’t go back to sleep. Is this normal?
mascot says
Yep. Which is awesome when people tell you to get all the sleep you can now before the baby comes. Talk to your doctor too if the insomnia is getting really out of hand. Sometimes a few nights of ambien or benadryl can get your clock to re-set.
MomAnon4This says
Yes. It is normal. If you NEED your sleep – still working, other kids, whatever – Unisom and Benedryl and even Tylenol PM are all ok, but obvs. feel free to check with your doctor. I wish I’d slept better my third trimester with my 1st kid. My 2nd kid I was like, I need to sleep. Give me meds.
Anonymous says
Yep totally normal. I eventually embraced it and would just get up and use the time to do something productive (laundry, prepping dinner). Not fun, but better than tossing and turning and stressing about how I wasn’t sleeping.
BKDC says
Pregnancy Insomnia is a cruel, cruel mistress. I experienced it with my first and am battling it again with my second. Sorry — I have no advice aside except to maybe try to read a paperback for a few minutes to see if that helps wind you back down.
Sleep OP says
I tried that last night and it didn’t work, so I got up and made and ate French toast at 2 am and that did the trick ;)
Meg Murry says
+1 to the cruel mistress. I wound up cutting my work hours significantly around 37-38 weeks, and leaving work altogether by week 39 with both of my kids – because it reached the point where I just didn’t feel like I’d had enough sleep to be safe to drive my one hour commute, and I got so little done when I was at the office because I was such a zombie. I went to a schedule where I basically slept in chunks spread throughout the day (I would go to the pool and water walk mid-morning and then come home and nap, for instance) because I wasn’t getting more than 6 hours total at night, usually in 2-4 hour chunks.
Two Cents says
for anyone looking for elegant mom jewelry, I recently bought this engraved pendant and am really happy with it. I put the initials of both of my kids. It’s lovely and pretty inexpensive too.
http://www.stelladot.com/shop/en_us/p/signature-engravable-id-tag
ps: I have no affiliation with this company
AEK says
Apropos of nothing— I am on day # 3 of not pumping at all at work!!! The freedom is just starting to sink in. Oh, and the new (old) wardrobe options!
And the massive anxiety is subsiding, too…finally stopping having near-panic attacks at the thought of an empty milk shelf in the freezer. Never had much of a stash, and now it’s gone. And everything is fine.
Carrie M says
Congrats! That is such a great feeling. When I stopped pumping, I tallied up how many hours I had spent doing it and it was ridiculous. Enjoy your new HOURS of freedom from the flanges!
Clementine says
Congratulations!
And oh sweet Lordy, I just started to calculate how much time I’ve spent pumping… I spent 6 weeks pumping 7-10 times/day… figure 15 minutes average for an average 8 times/day for 2 hours/day for 42 days which is 84 hours… and that’s just in the first 6 weeks!!!!
That’s not calculating anything since!!!
I’ve pumped so much I’ve actually been able to donate a few gallons of milk.
MomAnon4This says
And the energy. The energy that comes back with each dropped nursing/pumping session… I remember that…
AEK says
Oh I hope so! Although, if that energy isn’t going toward milk producing, I suppose I’ll need to start eating less again. Hopefully the AM / PM breastfeeding will allow me to continue the Donut Diet for just a little longer…
sfg says
This is where I am (Donut diet – actually, breakfast burritos, as well). I have stopped pumping during the day but am still doing a pump session or two at home depending on the day… the anxiety is starting to subside, though. I figure the AM nursing session is the biggest and that has to be worth at least most of a donut. ;)
Edna Mazur says
Yay! Good for you. I miss dresses…
quail says
Hello old wardrobe friends! Hello time!
My kid has recently transitioned onto 100% cow’s milk and my freezer stash is gone – I also had a little anxiety about it dwindling, but it is SO NICE to be able to go to the store and buy his food. I know that sounds weird but no longer being the main food source is really, really nice.
Tigermom says
That’s awesome! Be aware that your hormones are doing a funny dance to get back to your normal now so if you feel a little depressed/insomnia/irritable etc it might have to with that. I didn’t realize there was a link and was so depressed when I weaned #1.
Meg Murry says
Yes, and if you didn’t get periods when nursing (or if they are really light) and you aren’t on hormonal birth control, be prepared for a few sessions of killer PMS – for me it was like being a hormonal and confused 14 year old all over again, complete with feelings of teenage defiance and acne.
AEK says
Thank you for both of these warnings re depression & PMS… I hope it’s not too bumpy of a ride, but I am trying to prepare myself (and my husband) in case it is.
CapHillAnon says
Suggestions for brick-and-mortar store for maternity dress in/near DC? I’m about 21 weeks with my third, belly huge already, and I have an event this weekend (going to be godmother at a christening). I just realized that I have only dark, basic work maternity clothes (and really not many of those!) and will be out of step with the day/ level of formality. I’ve been looking casually online (Loft, banana, etc., plus I actually went to Old Navy and Target just in case) and have seen zero that looks like it would be flattering. And now I’m out of time! I’m 5’8, about size 6 pre-preg, have only changed shape in my belly, which looks basketball-y, and stripes are not my friend.
Legally Brunette says
Try Wiggle Room in Bethesda. It’s a maternity consignment store.
You can also look at Nordstrom online and ask for rush shipping.
Finally, I have this dress in both black and gray (sizes 4 and 6, I believe) and it’s so flattering. I’m in northwest DC. I wore it to work, my shower, and a wedding. I would sell it to you for a fair price if you want to come by and try it on.
http://www.seraphine.com/shift-dress.html
AEK says
I know you asked for physical stores, but in case you’re a Prime member, don’t forget about Amazon. There is a huge selection of maternity dresses. I had luck with Ingrid & Isabel brand.
Lyssa says
It’s been a few years, but I was actually really impressed with the dress selection at Motherhood Maternity. No, they weren’t spectacular, but I got several dresses that I thought were pretty cute and very comfortable, and worked really well IMO for more formal events (churchy stuff, showers, weddings) and also were work appropriate with a sweater or blazer. Think empire waist, A-line, stretchy-ish material.
BKDC says
Some H&Ms and the Macy’s downtown will have some options.
Anonymous says
I would check the closest H&Ms. I was surprised to find that the store in Alexandria has a maternity section. Otherwise it may be easiest to pay for the rush shipping from Nordstrom.
CapHillAnon says
Thanks so much for the suggestions, ladies! This is a big help. (and legally Brunette–super cute dress, I am just looking for something outside the grey and black field). Thanks again!
RDC says
Bellies and babies in del Rey – another good consignment store b
Anon says
Just a vent, but I am on my fifth invite to Norwex/Matilda Jane/Stella/MLM party from a friend. I love these people but am not interested in your expensive stuff that I don’t need.
Anonymous says
cosign. What is it with all the MLM lately? It used to be just Avon and Mary Kay and Tupperware that my mom went to back in the day. Now there are 3 billion different MLM cos.
Anon says
Incredibly annoying. My favorite is when they claim their MLM scheme “blessed them” so they could stay home with their children and earn tens of thousands of dollars each month. Right.
O says
Oh God this! For me its Rodan and Fields, it has claimed two friends already. When I first moved back to town (I grew up here, escaped and here I am again) I was so depressed because these “parties” were the only things I was invited to, ugh!
Spirograph says
Alright wise ladies, give me your suggestions for how to get an almost-3 year old to go to bed quietly. Some nights he’s fine, many (like last night) we have a straight hour of tantrum. I can’t find any rhyme or reason to which nights are which; we have a solid routine of dinner, bath, brush teeth, stories, songs, sleep — if it starts to go to #*&$, it almost always begins at the teeth-brushing stage with no prior warning. He does it irrespective of which parent is handling bedtime. I would just close/lock the door and let him scream til morning, but my kids share a room and although baby sleeps like a rock, even she can’t reliably sleep through that racket. Plus, if he gets really worked up/vindictive, he’ll climb in her crib or start dropping books and stuffed animals in to wake her up on purpose, so I like to stay within earshot if he’s in a mood.
Taking away favorite toys the next day doesn’t work. Cutting # of stories or songs for lack of cooperation doesn’t work. Logic obviously doesn’t work. Calmly ignoring him and telling him to get back in bed if he wanders out of his room to scream more directly doesn’t work. H is a fan of one big spank (after a warning that that’s the next step) for “not listening to mommy and daddy,” and this is often effective, but there has to be a better way, right? Or are kids just little jerks and I have to wait until this, too, passes?
Anonymous says
Is it an issue of him being overtired on the nights that he melts down? That’s usually the cause of bedtime tantrums with my 4 year old.
AIMS says
This may be an imperfect solution but can you take baby out to sleep in a bassinet in your room on nights your kid is like this?
Anonymous says
I would try asking him why he’s upset. Talk to him about his feelings and different ways to deal with those feelings. It sounds like he’s struggling with his self regulation. Learning that sometimes you don’t want to do things (like going to bed) and have to do them anyway is hard and frustrating for kids. We talk with our 4 year old a lot about how sleep helps us grow big and strong and gives us energy to play. I find she can be reluctant to go to bed on a day when she’s had a big event (good or bad) – talking to her about what she’s thinking about helps- it’s like she needs to get it out so she can settle to bed vs. being afraid of lying there mulling it over.
Is he struggling to fall asleep once he is in bed? Maybe talk to him about what things he can think about that are relaxing to help him fall asleep. Would it help if he had a low light and a book to look at until he falls asleep? We emphasize that even if they can’t fall asleep right away, lying in bed is good rest that will help them have energy to play the next day.
Spirograph says
Thanks, I’ll try this… He does struggle to go to sleep sometimes. He has a little nightlight, and if he’s in a good mood, he’ll happily “read” or sing songs to himself in his bed. So I don’t think it’s sleeplessness that sets him off, but it can certainly become a vicious cycle, in that once he starts screaming, he’s too worked up to sleep.
Anonymous says
hope to helps – once I started asking my daughter why she didn’t want to go to sleep, I was surprised how often she started talking about something challenging that happened that day at daycare (her friend didn’t want to play with her; someone pushed in the playground etc). I think lying in bed by herself, the struggles of the day were sort of overwhelming her. I try to ask her what her favorite thing and hardest thing of her day was – I don’t remember every day but it definitely results in interesting conversations and info I wouldn’t otherwise get when I do.
Anonymous says
How old is your baby? Is there sibling rivalry going on or is your son desperate for attention? It definitely might be fear of being alone, fear of bad dreams, overwhelm from his day… could you change up the routine and do stories in your living room or a non-bedtime place?
Anonymous says
any chance bedtime is too early or too late? Does he still nap? Does bedtime depend on nap schedule?
I have a 2.5 y/o who needs to be in bed, lights out, at 7pm if she doesn’t nap or the world ends. If she naps, putting her to sleep before 8:30 is pointless.
We do lots of stories to help her settle down, and when she can’t settle, I have a nursery rhyme tape she likes that we listen to together (if i sing, she demands endless songs; this one mercifully ends in 10 min).
strollers for the tall? says
I remember hearing there were a few other tall mamas on here. I’m pregnant now and scouring craiglist for strollers. Any brands/styles/specific recommendations for a stroller comfortable for tall folks? I’m 5’10” in flats and my husband is 6’2″ so we’re not giants, but I don’t want to be hunched over, either.
Spirograph says
We’re similar heights to you and your husband and have a Citi Elite, which we love. The handle has adjustable angles. I find the middle settings most comfortable, so there’s certainly room for taller people to push comfortably, too.
Anonymous says
Uppababy and Stokke have the broadest handle adjustment, I believe. You might really like the Stokke because the seat itself can also be raised or lowered, so you wouldn’t have to bend down super far to get to baby.
Anonymous says
I’m the same height as you and we had the Quinny Buzz. I loved it especially because the stroller seat can rearface so I could talk to my LO during walks.
strollers for the tall? says
Thanks!! I’m glad for multiple options as it would be my preference to find a used one (and we’ve got a few months yet), but if I have to buy one new, NBD.
JJ says
I’m 6′, as is my husband, and we LOVED our Uppababy Vista. The Uppababy umbella stroller was also fantastic for our height.
Anonymous says
Have and love the uppababy Cruz.
Philanthropy Girl says
I’m 5’9″ and we have the Britax B-agile – it just a hair too short for me. I need only another inch or two. I would not recommend it to my tall friends.
Clementine says
Yeah, I’m a similar height and my husband is talk as well and the B-Agile was like 2 inches too short for us.
We ended up with a city mini GT which we LOOOVE. The adjustable handle means my petite mil can use it as well.
ELL says
My husband is 6’6″, and I’m 5’10”. The city mini gt was one of the very few we found comfortable. Make sure to check them while you’re walking quickly too. Plus, such a great fold.
Momata says
What do y’all think about the CDC’s recommendation that fertile women who are not on birth control completely abstain from alcohol, because of the risk that they might get pregnant and the baby would have fetal alcohol syndrome? I personally find it extremely patriarchical (is that a word?) and not based on much. It assumes women can’t stop drinking if/when they become pregnant (which, there’s a lead time during which the embryo is not taking any substances from the mother). It also assumes that a drop of alcohol is poisonous to the fetus – an assumption indeed, rather than a data-driven fact, as Emily Oster has pointed out. And yet now I feel guilty for having some wine during my third trimester with each of my kids.
Anonymous says
I think reactions on this issue often depend on whether one has had personal experience with FAS kids. I did child protection law and saw many times how incredibly challenging and not infrequently marriage destroying it is to parent an FAS child – including one that was adopted knowing they have FAS. I LOVE LOVE LOVE my red wine but I did not drink at all while TTC or pregnant – even thought I knew it was statistically unlikely, I was too paranoid that I would have an FAS child. It lowered by stress level to know that by avoiding entirely there was no chance of FAS.
Anonymous says
‘my’ stress level not ‘by’ stress level – I miss the edit button!
Anonymous says
FAS is a terrible thing (anyone else see the article about it recently in the Washington Post? So sad), but there’s a big difference between binge drinking and an occasional glass of wine. If you aren’t on birth control and routinely get blackout drunk, you should probably stop for a lot of reasons. But moderate social drinking? Please. I knowingly had one drink several times during each pregnancy. My kids are fine. In fact, I’m planning on drink #2 of pregnancy #3 tonight. I think it’s unfortunate the CDC is taking such an absolute stance rather than recognizing that while “no level of alcohol consumption is proven to be safe” during pregnancy, an occasional drink is probably not harmful. But I can see why they’d rather be safe than sorry with such serious a potential outcome for people going too far.
sfg says
Strikes me as patriarchal if there is no data to support it. During pregnancy I felt like I was viewed as my baby’s vessel – but this is a whole new level of not trusting women with their own bodies. Meanwhile, there are things that ARE detrimental to fertile women and fetuses, such as stress and depression (supported by data), that don’t receive nearly the attention that alcohol does.
lsw says
+1 totally
Philanthropy Girl says
I agree completely.
Occasional to moderate drinking during pregnancy is common around the world and throughout history without demonstrable impact on the unborn child. To my understanding the only data regarding alcohol and FAS involves excessive consumption – I’m not aware of any data linking occasional or moderate consumption to FAS during TTC or pregnancy.
Pogo says
FAS is definitely awful and I agree that excessive drinking is never a good idea, regardless of if you’re TTC or not.
However, the few days I’ve ‘partied’ while TTC (New Year’s, a wedding) I was either 1) on my period/in a part of my cycle where I couldn’t possibly be pregnant or 2) took a pregnancy test to confirm that I was not pregnant before indulging. I think assuming that women can’t handle that level of understanding of their own body is patriarchal.
Anonymous says
This is such an overreach. The recommendation is for all fertile women not on bc, not just women TTC! That is insane. Unless it’s coming along with free birth control for everyone forever, this is completely unrealistic and unattainable. This makes me think someone over at the CDC read that WaPo article and immediately blasted off this recommendation memo while mired in a cloud of WaPo sadness. Should we expect a retraction in the way the CDC retracted its recommendation on no screen when it re-evaluated how unrealistic that was?
Pogo says
Wow, that amounts to an admission that a fertile woman cannot control her own s3xual encounters and her own body (which I personally believe is true in many places given the incidence of s3xual assault and lack of reproductive health care).
This makes me so ragey. I assumed they meant women actively TTC. barf.
Anonymous says
Which, if I’m remembering correctly would have been a gross misreading of the article. I believe that woman drank heavily through several pregnancies. One resulted in FAS, one baby died of SIDS (correlated with various risky behaviors, but could be entirely unrelated, too) and one or more kids were fine. I’m pretty sure no one is going to take away, “yay, I’ll keep getting sloshed because there’s only a *chance* of FAS and maybe my baby will be one of the lucky ones,” but it’s my understanding that the actual threshold of consumption where FAS becomes a possibility is still poorly understood. Hence the erring on the side of extreme caution, but at some point it kind of becomes fear-mongering and overreach. And gives fuel to all those judgey busybodies who feel the need to tell pregnant women how to live.
MDMom says
I’m not a fan of any recs that aren’t evidence based. I have worked with/seen effect of FAS on families but I’m also married to a doctor. He assured me it was fine to drink alcohol or beer on occasion during pregnancy. I did not. I did, however, adopt a “drink til it’s pink” philosophy during ttc. As it turns out, I drank a lot the weekend before I got a positive test- we were on a getaway weekend with friends and I thought period was starting. It didnt. Baby is only 8 months but fine so far. I’m not worried. Have never heard of FAS case where only alcohol consumption was prior to positive pregnancy test.
MDMom says
And yes I do think there is some patriarchy at play.
Anonymous says
I think the reason for that part of the recommendation is unplanned pregnancies. Some women still get their periods after pregnancy and if they are not TTC – they could be 3 months along before they do a test. For people actively TTC and testing regularly, drink ’til its pink is probably fine.
Anonymous says
the other issue is that “on occasion” makes sense as a fine recommendation between a husband and wife when he can tell you that you’re exceeding it but doesn’t work for the FDA. “on occasion” means weekly or more often to some people and monthly or less to others. Given that there is no known safe level – it’s really hard for the FDA to come out and say monthly is okay (it may not be depending on a specific person as there are genetic factors as well – American Indians and Asians are at higher risk).
Anonymous says
Fun fact: This is in part because many people of Asian descent lack/have less of the enzyme that breaks down alcohol. An inhibitor of that enzyme is also present in durian fruit, so you should not drink after you eat it, especially if you’re Asian!
Pogo says
I get what the CDC is trying to say, but it still seems so tone deaf. It seems easy to reduce the issue to telling women of child bearing age not to drink. You’re not taking into account then that (1) women don’t always have the choice about how/when they’re having sex and (2) women should have full access to reproductive health care, including the morning after pill and abortion.
This is a really touchy subject for me, I guess. It just seems to be another way to police women’s bodies rather than address underlying issues about why unplanned pregnancies occur in the first place.
MDMom says
Yea I thought about that after I posted- there are always going to be women who don’t know they’re pregnant until later first trimester. I also get the difference between population level statements and individual. It just seems to go a bridge too far-why not stop at “no amount of alcohol is proven safe. ” ? That’s where the scientific evidence ends. Have they also recommended that women not eat sushi or unpasteurized soft cheeses unless they are on birth control?
Ultimately it’s a bit of a shrug for me. I also dont think cdc recs have much of a practical effect on anything. I do think following this advice would reduce incidence of FAS just by reducing incidence of unplanned pregnancies due to all the sobriety…But women most at risk here probably aren’t waiting with bated breath for new cdc recs.
Pogo says
Just venting that my RE’s office called to let me know that they booked the wrong type of appointment for me tomorrow, and that my HSG actually has to be done at a totally different location next Monday. I know this is just a preview of the kind of scheduling insanity that will come with actual medicated cycles, but I almost started crying when the woman told me that she messed up.
My work is somewhat flexible, but my husband hasn’t been able to accompany me to anything yet because he often has clients in the office that he can’t just abandon. Now I’m embarrassed about having to tell my boss that actually I don’t have a minor medical thing on Thursday it’s a different day entirely and no, I’m definitely not making this up.
I’m just venting, I know that it’s only going to get worse and I should just relax. I feel like I’ve been “just relaxing” about this whole thing forever now and I’m like, just stick a baby in me already. Im over it.
Anonymous says
I would just tell your boss what happened – the Doctor’s office screwed up the scheduling and gave you the wrong date.
Dee says
Feel free to vent. My Harmony test at 10 weeks took 2 weeks to process – and then they get a call saying that the sample wasn’t good or they needed more or something and could I come in again? OK, I have an appointment the next day or 2, 12/31.
So I’m there and they say the FedEx package isn’t going out because of NYE and I have to come back in the next business day. To take the blood for the Harmony test. For the 2nd time. Because They did it wrong the 1st time.
Ugh, doctors offices, and so many opportunities to screw up during pregnancy…
Ciao, pues says
Any opinions on whether it’s better to use a little stand-alone potty for potty training or an insert in a regular toilet? Did your kid graduate from little potty to an insert or go straight to using the insert? When?
I like the idea of not having to dump out the little potty, and not having my kid get too used to the idea of a little potty and reject potties that aren’t her little potty (including toilets), but I also want it to “take” and wonder if a stand alone little potty is better for that reason since it’s her size and she wouldn’t need as many steps/help to get to a little potty as she would for an insert on the regular toilet. Or does one come before the other?
Anonymous says
We did little potty (Baby Bjorn one is great) then toilet insert. The ‘big’ toilet was a bit intimidating at first. Once she got into the habit of using the potty, she was exciting about trying to use the ‘grown up’ toilet. The potty then was disappeared pretty quickly.
Spirograph says
We used a little potty for months, and my son had no problem when we took it away, which we just did abruptly one day when we decided his poop was too gross to be catching in a separate container pre-toilet. We started off just having him sit on the potty -and usually pee- before bath every night to get him used to the idea. Once we were really done with diapers all together, we switched to toilet + step. We never did an insert, he just holds onto the seat so he doesn’t fall in (and washes his hands afterward!). I kind of like this, because he doesn’t freak out if we need to use a public restroom; it’s the same as at home.
The worst thing about the little potty was that eventually he wanted to dump the pee in the toilet, himself. Instead of telling us he was done, he’d just pour it in, then fill the potty bucket with some water in the sink and dump that in the toilet, too, just like he’d seen us do. Very helpful of him, but his aim left something to be desired…
Ciao, pues says
My kiddo really likes taking her plate to the sink when she’s done with dinner. It’s so sweet that she wants to be helpful but so messy. I can only imagine what she’ll be like with the potty! Lawd.
anne-on says
We just used the Baby Bjorn insert and step. The idea of dumping out the little potty grossed me out, and didn’t really help since he was in daycare with ‘real’ potties that they were training the kids on. I also got a travel potty insert as his bottom was too small for a lot of standard toilets for a long time.
pockets says
I’m on day 2 of potty training and the little pot (we have the Baby Bjorn one) is great because I can take it around the house with me. No one tells you that potty training is basically just letting your kid pee on the floor until they figure it out! I’ve been trying to catch her right before she pees and then zoom her onto the potty. If we didn’t have the little pot I’d be spending all day in the bathroom.
Spirograph says
Oh yeah, I forgot that part! When we switched to underwear, we would put the little potty in whatever room my son was playing in as a visual reminder to him. We put it in his bedroom during nap time, too. It was definitely helpful in that respect.
Carrie M says
This is a great idea. We bought a little potty and she’s used it a bit, but I hadn’t even thought about moving it around to wherever she is. Thanks!
Anonymous says
we skipped the little potty entirely. we started potty training at 22 months and were good to go (and she peed in public toilets AND A PORTA POTTY!) by her 2nd birthday. Still wearing pullups at night (she’s 2.5) but that is probably ending soon.
Anonymous says
also, we had the potty insert thing at first ($12 on amazon, forget the brand but it’s the most commonly sold one), but she doesn’t need that anymore.
Ciao, pues says
teach me your secrets! did you follow a certain plan/ book/ method?
Anonymous says
My husband and I are the worlds most stubborn people, and we watched a lot of kids older than ours start to protest potty. So we started early. She’s an October birthday so we started Labor Day weekend. I took Friday off and we had a 4 day weekend where we rolled up all the rugs, took off her pants, and gave her tons of liquids. We took her to the toilet every 10-15 minutes on the clock and celebrated like crazy people when something happened. We also read the “potty” book 5-1000x/day.
After that weekend, she got the concept and daycare started too; she went cold turkey into underwear and they took her every 20 minutes and she got a sticker chart (!!!). She had more trouble at daycare than home because she was shy about telling teachers when she had to go, so that took about 2 weeks to work itself out.
Similarly, she took longer to figure out the feeling of having to poop. That was also probably about 2-3 weeks to get really locked down, and we got there by paying attention and sitting her down when she had gas etc. while it did take a few weeks to conquer solids, I think I only had to wash 5-10 pooped in diapers because much of it went to the toilet.
When she was feeling a little frustrated (week 2-3) we used m&ms as a celebratory reward and allowed daycare to do it too.
She was 90% there by end of sept and 100% by her mid October b’day. She is dry during naps now but still wears a pull-up overnight and is probably a few months from being able to hold it all night. Ped says this is all developmental and not a training thing so we aren’t even really trying, other than celebrating dry AM diapers.
Ciao, pues says
Thanks for writing this all out! I’ve heard that the one intensive weekend thing is the way to go.
My kiddo is starting to take interest in the bigger kids at daycare using the potty which makes me think it might be time, but she also doesn’t seem to know when she’s pooped and/or resists being changed (because she doesn’t want to leave her toys) so I wonder if it’s still too early.
Meg Murry says
For my oldest we went straight to a big potty with an insert (and he was younger than my oldest) and it worked well – but just about everything with training kid #2 went better than training kid #1, for no particular reason than that they are different kids with different tempermants and we had learned what NOT to do.
The other big difference though was that with kid #2 we had 2 bathrooms, one on each floor. With kid #1 we only had one bathroom on the 2nd floor, so the little potty was useful so he could sit there and an adult could still use the main potty rather than wait for him to sit there for an extended period of time.
Chi Squared says
We got a little potty, but decided to skip straight to the big potty with an insert after a few weeks. My daughter wanted to use the big potty, and viewed the little one as more of a toy. It had lights and made flushing noises.
Anonymous says
My parents and I have always had a distant relationship- I moved out quite young and I suppose I never felt they paid much attention to me compared to their other children. We are all adults now, and I suppose by most objective standards I’m the most successful of their kids (I swear I haven’t done anything horrible for them to dislike me). My child was born over a year ago and they haven’t visited once (I visited once when they guilt tripped me). We live about a three hour flight away. Neither of them are working right now, their health is reasonably okay (nothing that would rule out a flight) financially they could afford the flight. I used to try and make efforts to call on Facebook video or Skype or whatever and they seems to enjoy that but I find myself angry that they never visit or call or do anything to get to know their grandchild. There definately were times we could have used some help around the house even for a week or something and it hurts seeing my friends who have supportive parents who visit frequently. I’ve invited them to stay with us as they’ve never seemed interested. I know this is a very first world problem, I’m not looking for free childcare or money I would just like one of them at least to visit. Am I right to feel resentful that they make no efforts to known their only grandchild?
Anonymous says
I’m so sorry. You have every right to feel sad/upset about it. Not visiting your grandchild is unfathomable to me. Unfortunately you can’t force them to visit. Beyond inviting them periodically, not sure what else you can do. Really sorry.
Anonymous says
No, I get it. My FIL has not met my one year old daughter yet. He is retired, has plenty of money, and lives a short flight away. We have not flown to see him since the summer before my daughter was born, it is expensive to pay for 3-4 plane tickets and we already did that once in the past year (to visit another grandparent who actually also makes an effort to come visit us) to say nothing of the hassle of traveling with 2 small kids. DH and I are both miffed about it.
Objectively, though, some people are just not into babies. To you, your child is the most wonderful, important thing ever, but to a lot of people – even grandparents – it’s just a little blob that won’t get interesting for another few years. I wouldn’t write off your parents, this just might not be their phase. At least that’s what I tell myself and my husband.
Anonymama says
That’s a bummer. I wonder if part of the distance is because you are so successful, so they feel like you don’t need them as much? I think my parents sometimes feel like that with me, like they know I’m going to be okay, so they don’t have to worry about me as much as my siblings. And then if they don’t have that parent-taking-care-of-child role to play, they sometimes feel awkward or uncomfortable. Can you try building up the relationship, maybe calling or face-timing at a regular time to show them the baby, and opening up to them about what you are learning about parenting, or asking for advice or about what you were like as a baby and that kind of thing? Or even just being straightforward, “we really really want you to come visit! It’s important to me that baby knows you, can you come at this specific time?” for my parents flying is still a pretty big deal, and they are not great at making plans ahead of time, so it helps when I tell them a specific time to visit, and how to get tickets (Southwest flies right into nearby airport!). It stinks that they’re not more enthusiastic, but it sounds like it’s kind of up to you to build that relationship if you want it, for yourself and your kids.
Betty says
I adore my kids’ preschool. However, there tends to be a stay at home parent in the picture (the program only runs 9:00-12:00) for the vast majority of the kids. They just sent an email requesting that each kid bring in 14 homemade Valentines. Um. Who has time for that?! And what is wrong with Valentines from a box?
KEL says
So annoying. I think the no-buying is to level the playing field so no one feels economic pressure to purchase something. However, that is dumb, because 14 valentines could be bought for $1, whereas art supplies and your time cost much more!
Can you stack 14 sheets of printer paper on top of each other and simultaneously cut out 14 hearts for your dear little person to scribble on?
Anonymous says
Do you have a nanny/sitter (who enables you to send your daughter to a 9-12 program)? Have that person do the homemade cards with your kid!
I do feel ya but my kid loves art so we could knock out 14 valentines on an hour on a Saturday morning. Mom cuts 14 hearts out of paper (doesn’t even have to be red!). Give kid stickers and red markers. If she can write her own name, let her. Done!
My kid makes cards “for Grammy” like every other day over breakfast, and she’s not even 2.5 ;). And at least you have 2 weeks notice- they COULD spring this in you the week of!!
Anonymous says
Or easier- print 14 hearts on printer paper. Add markers and stickers (do NOT go out and buy themed stickers, use whatever is lying around. For us, it’s robot stickers.)
Even better!
Meg Murry says
At least you are getting a weekend’s notice instead of getting it on Monday or Tuesday for Valentines due Friday?
But, yes, ugh – it’s preschool people! Although we are in the opposite boat – older brother is doing Valentines for his elementary school class (oh, excuse me, “Friendship cards”, mm-hmm, whatever) and younger brother wants to know why HE doesn’t get to make Valentines. Last year we got a note that said “please DON’T send in Valentines” from preschool – this year I’m hoping to talk to the teacher about whether my kid can please bring them so I don’t have to deal with tantrum city from him.
FYI, IMO valentine “printables” that you let your kid scribble or add stickers to totally count as homemade in my book. That is our compromise position – and you can find lots of cute one by just googling “valentine printable”. Make them in 2 or 4 to a page, print out 7 or 4 pieces of printer paper, cut and let your kid go to town. Or let your kid make one “homemade” valentine, scan it and then print it out 14 times? Also counts in my book (and might be really cute to email to family members).
NewMomAnon says
Kiddo got overly enthusiastic about an art project that involved red paint (add some water and dish soap, blow bubbles with a straw, put the paper on top – cool bubble pattern!) and we ended up with 35 pages of computer paper, all doused in paint and she wouldn’t let me throw them away. A week later, I dipped a big heart cookie cutter in paint, stamped heart shapes all over her artwork, and cut around the heart outlines. I might write “From, kiddo” on them before dropping off at school. Valentines cards – done. Enormous amount of kid artwork – disposed of. Weekend afternoon spent with busy, happy toddler – accomplished.
But it would annoy me no end if someone made it a requirement that I concoct homemade Valentines cards. Crafts are supposed to be fun, not forced.