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As I’ve mentioned before, I don’t bend over backwards to plate overly cute meals for my kids, but I like to think that ANY meal would look cute on this placemat/plate. It’s 100% food grade silicone, BPA, PVC, lead and phthalate free — and says it’s ok for the dishwasher. It looks particularly cute for the messy years… which, hmmn, both my boys are still in. It’s $24.95 at Amazon, available in four colors and eligible for Prime. ezpz Happy Mat (Blue) – One-piece silicone placemat + plate Psst: Ladies, what are your favorite non-toxic but dishwasher safe cups, plates, and more for your kiddos? I’ve been thinking about it since our discussion on the melamine soup spoons and spent far too much time perusing The Soft Landing’s 2012 guide last night.Sales of note for 3.28.24
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- Target – 20% off Easter styles for all; up to 30% off kitchen & dining; BOGO 50% off shoes & slippers for the family;
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And — here are some of our latest threadjacks of interest – working mom questions asked by the commenters!
- If you’re a working parent of an infant with low sleep needs, how do you function at work when you’re in the throes of baby’s sleep regression?
- Should I cut my childcare down to 12 hours a month if I work from home?
- Will my baby have speech delays if we raise her bilingual?
- Has anyone given birth in a teaching hospital?
- My child eats everything, and my friends’ kids do not – how should I handle? In general, what is the best way to handle when your child has some skill/ability and your friend’s child doesn’t have that skill/ability?
- ADHD moms, give me your tips to help with things like behavior in the classroom, attention to detail, etc?
- I think I suffer from mom rage…
- My husband and kids are gone this weekend – how should I enjoy my free time?
- I’m struggling to be compassionate with a SAHM friend who complains she doesn’t have enough hours of childcare.
- If you exclusively formula fed, what tips do you have for in the hospital and coming home?
- Could I take my 4-yo and 8-yo on a 7-8 day trip to Paris, Lyon, and Madrid?
TBK says
I like this in theory, but reviews I’ve seen say that kids can still pick them up and flip them. Does the pink unicorn that is the unflippable toddler bowl exist? Since my kids have become self-feeding, I’ve mostly fed them directly from their high chair trays. B is moderately successful eating yogurt with a spoon from a suction Munchkin bowl, but when he gets toward the end, he’ll pick it up and lick the yogurt out of the bowl, spilling what’s left into his lap (i.e., the suction is basically useless). I tried giving them chili in bowls this past weekend and A just picked up the bowl and flipped it all into his lap. B struggled with the spoon for awhile, then picked up the bowl and licked out the chili, again spilling what was left into his lap. I realize that toddler meals are messy, but if a bowl exists that actually stays put, that would go a long way toward helping to teach my kids to eat with utensils (won’t stop them holding the spoon in one hand and digging the food out of the bowl with the other, but it would be a start).
ak says
I have this product. It’s ok – I think it would stick well and not slide if directly on a table. But I still feed my guy in his high chair, and this product does not fit exactly on the tray, so he is able to lift up the side and flip it if he wants.
Pigpen's Mama says
My kiddo has pulled up all the sticky place mat things I’ve tried (the Summer Infant reusable one and the disposable kind) as well as the suction bowls I have. My conclusion is that these are to prevent klutzy toddlers from knocking over a bowl unintentionally, not tots determined to get rid of whatever may be offending them at the time.
So no help, just commiseration…
(was) due in June says
I own this. It’s great. If you position it right (no edge sticking off the edge of the table), she can’t pull it up. We use it directly on the table, with a Tripp Trapp (no tray). There’s also a mini version that’s sized for a high chair tray, or you could use the bowl version, which is sized for a high chair tray as well.
(was) due in June says
(we own the bowl version too. also great.)
RDC says
We give our toddler two spoons to avoid the digging with the free hand. Works for now since he really loves spoons.
Edna Mazur says
I realize this is probably quite frustrating to you, but the mental image of your boys licking/dumping/etc. made me smile !
TBK says
It’s mostly adorable. But A dumped the chili in his lap after an afternoon that involved pushing ALL the buttons on Daddy’s PS4 and re-setting something we still can’t figure out, eating stray dog kibble on the floor, slamming (gently — he’s only so strong) his brother’s fingers in a door, houdiniing out of his high chair straps so I found him STANDING on his high chair, and smooshing a handful of chili into his just-washed hair then smearing his chili-stained hand onto my light blue new cashmere sweater (my fault for not changing out of the sweater before feeding him). I was not impressed by the chili dumping.
Philanthropy Girl says
We have the suction bowls too, and I agree they’re useless. I think they actually make a bigger mess because of the pushing and pulling to unsuction it. Right now my kiddo is dumping his food off his plate and putting his plate on his head. Lovely.
The closest I have found to unflippable is the Gyrobowl. It’s really more of a snack bowl than a dinner time bowl and we have’t braved it with something like chili with our 17 mo old. It survived an entire church service without spilling cheddar bunnies all over the sanctuary just last week, and typically keeps the raisins off my living room floor. Cut up bits of chicken and cheese also seem to stay in the bowl at lunch time, in spite of efforts to the contrary.
It isn’t foolproof by any stretch of the imagination, but it is the best I’ve found.
Lipase? says
So I know several posters on here have dealt with a high lipase issue. I happened to notice that some of my frozen and thawed breastmilk has a slight soapy taste to it; however, my kid has always taken it with zero issues. I did the check where you put a bottle in the fridge and check it at 8/12/24 etc hours and mine seems to slightly switch around 48 hours and keep that same slight taste difference once frozen and thawed.
Like I said though, the baby guzzles down thawed and reheated milk with no issues. What would you do here? Should I start heat treating the milk that’s going into my freezer stash (I currently have a huge one) just in case baby starts rejecting it? Should I not worry at all about this? Honestly- I wouldn’t have even noticed except that I got some on my hand while prepping a bottle and just licked it off the other day.
Le sigh. This is one of those cases where I’m wondering if ignorance is bliss.
MDMom says
I would do nothing except try to freeze or use your milk within 48 hrs in the future. My understanding is that it’s just a taste issue not a nutrition issue, so if your kid is fine with it, it’s fine. I agree that probably ignorance is bliss…
JTX says
Agree with this. I have had high lipase with both of my kids. With the first kid, I didn’t know until he began rejecting my frozen milk. When I finally checked the milk, it tasted awful – very metallic and soapy. With my second, I have been scalding the milk before freezing and he doesn’t seem to have any problem with it. But scalding it is a giant PITA. And scalding destroys most (or all) of the enzymes and bacteria in the milk, not just lipase – including stuff that is beneficial to your kid. So, no, I would not scald the milk if your baby drinks it the way it is.
Maddie Ross says
If what you’re doing is working and kiddo is fine, I wouldn’t change a thing. TBH, I never ever tasted my own milk. That totally skeeved me out for some reason. So I have no idea what it tasted like it whether there was any issue, but LO guzzled it. It could have tasted like soap and I would have no idea…
MomAnon4This says
Agreed. My kids drink my milk cold out of the fridge. Why would I do anything to it? Don’t make more work for yourself, breastfeeding/pumping is hard enough and you have enough challenges to come (trust me)
Meg Murry says
How old is baby? I’d not make more work for yourself, and just keep doing what you are doing – and maybe once s/he gets a little older you could make sure that you can combo feed with formula so that if it comes to the point where you aren’t pumping enough and you need to suppliment, if baby won’t take the frozen milk at that point you could use formula.
I didn’t experience any lipase issues, but I also never tasted or made a point to smell my defrosted milk. So I’d say don’t borrow trouble if baby is drinking it currently.
If you want to avoid shuffling milk in and out of the freezer, I always sent what I pumped right to daycare (so on Tuesday morning daycare got my Monday pumped milk, etc) and anything I pumped on Friday plus anything left over from Thursday got frozen and I was only using frozen milk 1 day per week.
TK says
I gave up on suction bowls because they were just a fun game for little TK. When he applied enough pulling force to overcome the suction function the bowls shot upwards quickly and the food flew further. Hilarious for him, not so much for me.
AEK says
Yes! The Munchkin bowl with the suction bottom and the lid (the small one in the set) is my son’s favorite “toy” right now.
hoola hoopa says
Yes, we also found them to be more distraction/mess than a help.
Famouscait says
Question for the Hive: how much fatigue is reasonable/expected as a parent?
I used to be an energizer-bunny-type: no tiredness as long as I got my 8 hours of sleep at night. I did take up napping during pregnancy. Now, (my son is 15m) I still get at least 8 hours of sleep a night, but I am so.tired.every.day around 3:30/4pm. Lots of days I leave work to head home for a brief nap before I go back out and pickup my son from daycare!! Does this sound normal/relateable to you all? Based on no evidence whatsoever I’m concerned that this is a side effect of my Mirena IUD (which I’ve had in for about 13m). I drink more caffeine now than I ever did before (one huge cup of light black tea in the morning; none for lunch; sometimes a coke in the late-afternoon if I can’t get home for the aforementioned nap). I get moderate exercise each week (a couple of runs and/or long walks) and am trying to incorporate more protein into my lunch. I guess I’m just trying to figure out if this is what being 32 and a full-time working mom is like (i.e. my new normal), or if this is off-base. Thanks for your insights!
TBK says
When my boys were about 11-18 mo old, I would fall asleep on the Metro every day going home. I stopped scheduling afternoon meetings because it was a real struggle to stay awake through them, and I often shut my door and put my head down on my desk for a quick 15 min nap. Now though? I might nap with the boys on weekends, but only for about 20 min and on weekdays, I’m 100% fine. I actually feel more rested than I did before kids (I think because I’m more ruthless with myself about getting to bed on time — just in case someone wakes up in the middle of the night). I think it helps that my kids now reliably sleep until 7:00 so I can get up at 6:30 and be all showered with hair and make-up done (and often have finished my coffee) by the time they wake up. It’s a huge difference over waking up at 6:00 the way they used to.
Betty says
Yes! The ability to get up first and have 30 minutes/1 hour to get stuff done is amazing. I feel so much more pulled together now that I can get up, shower and be dressed before the first call for milk/ cereal/ Paw Patrol/ chase away the imaginary scary dragon.
Anonymous says
I am 34 with a 16 month old, and I definitely need more sleep now than I ever did before. I think it is mostly due to juggling so many things in my “on” time, and having so much more “on” time than before. That said, I’m not so tired that I need a nap during the week (I’d like one, but don’t need one) – I do almost always nap when my daughter does on weekends. If you NEED a nap most days and are getting 8 hours at night (and not 8 hours interrupted every few hours by a tossing and turning toddler in the next room – or do I have the only noisy sleeper?), there may be more to it.
mascot says
What are you eating for lunch? If it’s all carbs and no fat/protein, this could be part of the fatigue. I’d try to incorporate more water and more filling lunches. Also, is your bedtime at a set time? Are you getting outside and getting some sunshine pretty regularly (low light in winter can mess with my sleep).
Famouscait says
Lunch today is lentil soup, half an avocado with half an everything bagel, cheese, and a banana. Drinking lots of water is one of the good habits I kept over from pregnancy. Incorporating more sunshine (which will inevitably = more exercise) is also a good idea. A set bedtime is hard for me because there are usually 2 nights a week that I don’t get home from work until 11pm(ish) due to work events.
Meg Murry says
What time is bedtime the other nights? It sounds like you might be almost jet-lagging yourself with those couple of late nights. I read a study that said that staying up more than a certain number of hours late on the weekends (2 maybe?) was basically like starting every Monday jet-lagged.
TK says
Are you nursing? I was exhausted every day until that got done.
It’s better now (boy is 2) but sleep is still not nearly as restful as it used to be – I attribute it to whatever biological change happened that made me wake up in a panic whenever I heard the slightest sound from the baby. He only *actually* needs help in the middle of the night once every couple of weeks or so, but I wake up whenever he coughs or whatever, immediately – which tells me I don’t sleep as deeply as I once did.
Famouscait says
Not nursing, but I do think more of my brain is “on” all the time, in regards to listening for kiddo. Ironically, I have terrible hearing so I only ever hear “phantom baby” and not the real thing. Every siren 5 blocks away sounds like my baby crying, to me.
LSC says
This could be normal, but I would suggest getting your blood work done just to rule out any iron/B12 or other easily remediable issues.
Spirograph says
Or D. I was diagnosed with low vitamin D last year and prescribed a weekly supplement. I wouldn’t say I’m never tired (because I still have 2 kids under 3) but it has made a big difference. +1 to mentioning it to your doctor, who will probably suggest blood work.
kc esq says
I’m with you. And my bedtime is strictly enforced. And my kids rarely disturb me at night. Even though I don’t have an infant anymore, and my co-workers started telling me months and months ago that, “You don’t look so tired all the time anymore,” I still feel way more tired than I ever did pre-kids. I remember my mom falling asleep on the couch any time she had the chance when I was little (and she was always super healthy/ active). I think that the young kids juggle can just be exhausting.
Betty says
Have a young child is utterly exhausting, and even once you are past the wake-every-three-hours phase, you need time to recover from that phase. I remember being where you are. I napped every weekend, and struggled to make it through the day. By my kids’ dinner time, I was done. My youngest is 2.5ish now, and I can say that it has gotten so much better. I wish I could remember when it got better. Maybe it was when my youngest started actually sleeping (18 months) or some other milestone. All I can say is that it has and will get better. I have energy and brain power to think past the next 15 minutes. With that said, I agree with the others about getting a check-up but know that early parenthood is completely exhausting. Check out “The Blur” on Rants from Mommyland.
anne-on says
My son is nearly 4 and I still nap with him every weekend. And I’m totally zonked most days by 3. What helped for me is taking the sublingual b12/b6 pills that trader joes sells. I’ve also noticed that now that I have a non-hormonal IUD my period fatigue is really.really. bad for a few days every month. But yes, little kids are just exhausting. Lots of physical activity (pick me up! carry me! chase me! swing me! put me into/out of cars/beds/chairs). Zzzzzz
Famouscait says
Thanks, I’ll look into the B12 pills.
JEB says
I have a 14-month-old, and I’m EXHAUSTED. Like, sometimes I feel so tired it’s painful. I had my thyroid checked several months ago, and everything was fine. I noticed that the exhaustion got much worse when my daughter got much more active, probably around 8 or 9 months, I guess from chasing her around constantly and keeping her entertained. I joke sometimes that I’m more tired now than I was when she was a newborn, although that’s not an entirely fair comparison, since I was on leave back then. Honestly, I think the balance of working and parenting a young child is simply tiring! There’s almost no down time, and everyday can feel like a marathon.
I’d probably get some blood work done just to be safe, and take a look at your eating habits, as others have suggested. And we’ll both keep hoping that things get better as babies age!
Famouscait says
YES!! I keep thinking back to the newborn phase, and sure, I was tired. But this feels different (due to different circumstances, i.e. keeping up with my job!) Bloodwork has been checked and there’s a little tweaking to do there. Thanks so much for your perspective.
Meg Murry says
So I’m a bit of a weirdo because I have ADHD and therefore sometimes take caffeine to help me sleep, but I can sometimes get a buzz off of caffeine.
That said – I find that when I am relying on caffeine to keep me going is when I feel tiredest – because I get a burst of energy from the caffeine, then that wears off after an hour of me being the energizer bunny and now 2 hours after the caffeine I’m more exhausted than I was pre -caffeine. So you may want to try dialing that back – it will suck for a week or so, but may help in the long run.
I also think a big part of it is that pre-kids, if I wanted to sleep until noon (or at least 10 am) on an occasional Saturday or Sunday I could do that – with young kids, they are up early on the weekends and go-go-going all day long. So even though I wasn’t getting much less sleep that I had been pre-kids during the week, on the weekend I was not getting nearly as much sleep.
Now that my kids are 8 and 4 I am much much less exhausted, but I still often take naps with the kids on weekends to catch up, trade off with my husband (I get up early-ish on Saturdays, he takes Sundays while I sleep in) and when I get hit by a flu or bad cold the only thing that shakes it is for me to send the kids to daycare and to take a sick or vacation day just to stay home and sleep/rest for almost 24 straight hours.
In addition to bloodwork, do you snore or do you still feel exhausted even after a night’s sleep? A sleep study to make sure you don’t have sleep apnea might not be a bad idea either.
hoola hoopa says
I’m wondering if your sleep quality is good. If you are drinking more caffeine, that could be affecting your night time sleep. You could be sleeping more lightly to listen for children at night. You may be eating and drinking more after their bedtime, causing you to wake to use the bathroom. Sleep apnea could be in play. Worth getting your thyroid checked.
But yes, it is exhausting to be working FT, be in your mid-30’s, and have small children. I don’t think anyone is ever as well rested as they were pre-kids.
Anonymous4 says
Very familiar to me – I’ve been working with my doctor for about five months on fatigue and PMS issues. I’m also chugging tons of caffeine and I crave sugar energy boosts – trying to quit either of those is not going well in spite of good efforts. It’s been rough. I have a 17 month old. I’m now on selenium, vitamin d, bioidentical progesterone, NP Thyroid and just finished a dose of DIM (estrogen metabolizer). Adding the NP Thyroid seems like it is working, although the caffeine and sugar cravings are still hanging around. I run panels again this month.
Tiredness in the middle of the afternoon like that could be a thyroid or adrenal issue. Bloodwork can take a look at thyroid function – make sure they run all four thyroid tests and not just one or two. Often one will come back normal, but there is something screwy with one or more of the others. Adrenals can be checked with a saliva lab to check cortisol levels throughout the day.
I’m also on Vitamin D – and looking at possible PPD (depression can also cause fatigue).
I’d ask for a full hormone panel and a full thyroid panel, and also have your Vitamin D levels checked (especially this time of year).
Hope you feel better soon!
TAH says
In theory, this is a great product, because if you lift up on the “plate” part it is suctioned to the table. In practice, it took my son about 30 seconds to figure out that he can lift up the corner and move the entire thing.
That said, we still use it everyday, because he likes it and it’s easy to clean.
Betty says
Any other mom rettes have a different call-the-pediatrician threshold than your SO? If so, how do you handle it? I grew up in a military household where it was a high threshold to go to the doc, and the ER was reserved for true emergencies (life or limb) and a parent who was a RN. For my SO, it was the exact opposite: to the doc to check out every cough and fever, and the ER was used as a doc for when the doctor’s office was closed. Now that we have kids, we disagree over when a visit or call to the pediatrician or visit to the ER is warranted. I get frustrated at what I perceive to be panic at every cough, fever or bloody nose. Any advice?
Anonymous says
We don’t have this disagreement in our house but we liberally use the 24/7 nurse hotline through our insurance program and urgent care/walk in clinics. People should absolutely see a doctor or the ER if it’s truly warranted, but there are so many cases where something “lower” is available and too many people seeking overcare cost us all more for not-better outcomes (rant over…) Would he be open to those options? Or just calling/emailing your pediatrician?
CHL says
We don’t have this disagreement in our house but we liberally use the 24/7 nurse hotline through our insurance program and urgent care/walk in clinics. People should absolutely see a doctor or the ER if it’s truly warranted, but there are so many cases where something “lower” is available and too many people seeking overcare cost us all more for not-better outcomes (rant over…) Would he be open to those options? Or just calling/emailing your pediatrician’s nurse?
hoola hoopa says
Hmmm… No personal experience, but I can imagine it. I’d start to end each doctor/er visit with “Was it appropriate to come today with these symptoms? When/if should we return? What home care could we have done before coming in?” In other words, I’d prompt the doctor to steer.
I think the response does depend on what you see as the issue. If it’s cost, then try budgeting or framing the discussion that way. If it’s annoying, then send husband and stay home. Etc.
I like the call-in line in theory, but I feel like ours always ends with “come in for an appointment” because they essentially won’t give any medical advice over the phone even if it’s “wait until there’s a fever” or “come in if symptoms worsen or continue past 3 days”.
MarieC says
I think we have slightly different thresholds. But, when either of us foresee a reason to go to the dr we take the kid our self. So, as long as it is not a cost issue, it doesn’t bother me that SO found out kid’s cough was ok because SO spent the time to do it. It’d be different if SO was nagging me to do it.
Anonymous says
we did but now we don’t. We used to be pretty relaxed about it, until one day I went in and they immediately nebulized her, did a chest X ray, nebulized her again and wanted to admit her to the hospital for poor oxygen intake and she had a double ear infection. I felt like the Worlds Worst Mom for having waited 3 days of terrible coughing to take her in, but she didn’t have a fever and her sprits were high! She just had a wretched cough that kept her up and i for some reason couldnt’ hear the wheezing. we only called because 3 nights of coughing herself to the point of throwing up (twice) seemed way too odd. We ended up not hospitalizing her because it was NYE and the dr was afraid they’d kick her back out because she was so darn chipper (despite really low O2 stats), then came in for a check in on NY day and the following day.
After that episode, if it’s far from normal (she’s chipper, with a great appetite, and sleeps like a rock every single night), we call. If she has ANYTHING other than a runny noes for more than 24 hours, I call. Luckily, this isn’t often.
We do always call and talk to the 24/7 nurse line first to see if we should come in, and they always ask to see us. Like I said, my daughter is so chipper that i’m sure she has had COUNTLESS diagnosed ear infections.
Anonymous says
sorry- i didn’t realize this was about the ER. As 2 working parents, we specifically picked a ped that has a 24/7 nurse line and very extended hours (7-9 on weekdays; sat 9-5 and sun 10-5) so we can use them. We have never taken our daughter to the ER.
Betty says
Stuck in moderation, so trying again: Any other moms have a different call-the-pediatrician threshold than your SO? If so, how do you handle it? I grew up in a military household where it was a high threshold to go to the doc, and the ER was reserved for true emergencies (life or limb) and a parent who was a RN. For my SO, it was the exact opposite: to the doc to check out every cough and fever, and the ER was used as a doc for when the doctor’s office was closed. Now that we have kids, we disagree over when a visit or call to the pediatrician or visit to the ER is warranted. I get frustrated at what I perceive to be panic at every cough, fever or bloody nose. Any advice?
Maddie Ross says
I definitely fall more in your camp. We never went to the ER unless you were bleeding out or something was clearly broken (and even then, if our regular doc was open, we usually went there first). I can remember every ER trip I ever went on as a child and each ended with either stitches or a cast. While I was a bit skittish the first few months with a newborn, since she’s been about 1, we never go to the doc except for well visits. We’ve been to an urgent care place twice – once for minor stitches and once for a clear ear infection (love it now that she’s old enough to tell us). I’m pretty anti-antibiotics unless it’s truly necessary and I just don’t think there is any reason to go if there’s not a thing they can do. Honestly, I got the chicken pox from my ped’s office as a child being there for a sibling’s well-visit, and based on that, I’d rather avoid those places unless absolutely necessary. They are petri dishes.
Maddie Ross says
I should add in response to your specific question, how old is your child? If you have an infant, I totally get your husband’s skittish “they aren’t acting right” feeling and wanting/needing support. Would it be helpful to make him be the person that calls and speaks with the nurses at your ped each time? They can be reassuring that things are usually very minor.
Famouscait says
+1 to avoiding the actual office. My dad is a pediatrician and he doesn’t like me bringing my kiddo to his office to visit the staff. As he says, “That’s where all the sick people are.” Having your husband call a nurse or ped line is a much better option on so many fronts.
TBK says
I’m you (no medical person in the family, but we often didn’t have insurance and money was tight so medical visits were rare) and my husband is your husband. I just roll with it. There are other things that stress me out that don’t worry my husband and I know how panicky I feel when I’m stressed about kids, so I figure a quick call to the ped is nothing if it allays my husband’s dad-panic.
JJ says
I don’t have this issue with my husband, but I do with my mother. She thinks I need to take my kids to the doctor every time they pull on an ear or cough. Unless there’s something truly out of the ordinary, I won’t take them unless they’ve run a fever at least 3-4 days with no improvement. Otherwise, the doctor is just going to tell us it’s a cold… I never use the ER unless we have a true emergency (dog bites, allergic reaction, etc.).
If your SO insists on doctor and ER visits when they’re likely unnecessary, is there a way to tell him that he’s in charge of going to them and making sure all the bills are paid, etc.? It might open his eyes to how expensive and time-consuming those unnecessary trips are. And, on the off chance you have a friend that’s a doctor or nurse, have them mention how non-emergency ER visits waste time and resources for those people that truly need emergency help?
JJ says
Slightly related to this – I have never known a working mom that takes her child to the doctor like my (SAHM) mom did and like your husband probably wants to. I think it’s because we know it’s a waste of our precious time…
Anonymous says
We’re pretty much both like you but when we disagree we can the number at the local children’s hospital. They have specific pediatric advice line that you can call and tell them what the issue is and the RN will tell you if a visit to the ER is recommended. We use the advice line as an arbitrator when we can’t agree. We didn’t know about the advice line until after we went to the ER one time. Might be worth calling your local children’s hospital to see if they have something similar.
MDMom says
Does your pediatrician’s office have a nursing line? My husband and I are pretty similar on this most of the time but when we are unsure, our ped office has nursing staff always available so you can call to see if office visit is really necessary or if you can just continue to watch at home. Maybe your husband would feel better if he can call and have the nurse say “just keep an eye on it and call for appt on Monday if he still has fever then. “
kc esq says
I wouldn’t fight too much about a call to the pediatrician’s office during regular hours. Let them tell you whether to come in or not — although they’ll probably err on the side of calling you in. Outside of regular hours, I will only call the emergency pediatrician line if I am considering a trip to the ER — like after a bad fall or a worrisome rash, not just for a fever or something I know how to treat at home. The doctor has always advised that the ER wasn’t necessary, to call him back if something changed for the worse, and it never has.
NewMomAnon says
I have been to the ER twice in my life, and both times required life-saving emergency surgery (appendix and a random intestinal thing). My daughter is 2 and has never been to the ER (knock on wood).
BTW, for broken bones, the advice in my city is to skip the ER and go straight to the orthopedic medicine walk-in centers. We have several in town with 24 hour urgent care, and our large and awesome children’s hospital will take x-rays of suspected broken bones and then send kids over there for treatment; might as well skip a step and go directly there.
I use the pediatric nursing line every three to six months and saw my kiddo’s ped about monthly for the first year of daycare. Now it’s less frequent because she doesn’t get sick as often.
anne-on says
Does your kiddo have any chronic issues? My son had asthma, allergies, and recurrent ear infections (that lead to tubes as a toddler) and we were relatively quick to go to the doctor for treatment for those things, or when we knew something highly contagious was going around daycare (honestly, mostly to get a doctors note to confirm when he was ok to go back). If your child is little I can see going more often, its hard when they’re very small and can’t tell you what’s wrong. Otherwise, the nurse line is made for stuff like this.
Anonymous says
Good to know that I’m not alone in my approach. Our youngest is 2.5ish and our oldest is 5, so we are out of the newborn phase. And no chronic issues other than Celiac’s disease for the oldest (which we have under control). I have started backing off and not fighting him if he wants to call the ped’s office about whatever (last night it was a bloody nose). My SO tends to be a bit of a hypochondriac anyway (for himself), and he is addressing the underlying issues in therapy.
Betty says
Right, so that was me, the original poster.
Coach Laura says
As another option, many insurance companies also have staffed nurse lines – they’d much rather you talk to a triage RN then go to the ER, for example. Might be something to look into.
PregLawyer says
Do you have Zoomcare? Or something like it? I’m in the PNW and we use Zoomcare for my kid. You make an appointment online and you can get in to see a NP or PA. They function just like urgent care, but you can get an appointment within 30 minutes and I’ve never had a wait. They take most insurance and have clinics all over. It’s awesome.
Spirograph says
Yes. My dad is an ER doctor, so we had a very high threshold, too. I know a lot of basic first aid and am inclined to wait til something is serious or persistent to call in the big guns. I also just feel my kids’ foreheads to determine whether they have a fever. H is the type who will wake up sick baby (wtf!) to take rectal temperature and go to urgent care because he burned his fingers touching a hot pot handle (true story). I just try to stall him most of the time. If baby is lethargic and miserable even after tylenol for more than a day, we can call the ped. If fever lasts more than 3 days, we can call. If poop is a weird color 2 days in a row, we can call. If kiddo gets sick on a weekend, we can call on Monday if s/he’s not better. Our kids are generally healthy and almost everything resolves itself in a day or two. I’ll call my parents before the pediatrician half the time. Our pediatrician practice also has a 24 hour call line (the actual pediatricians respond, so I would never dream of using it in the middle of the night; if it’s that urgent, we’d go to the ER), so if necessary we can just call and the ped will confirm that we can wait and see unless XYZ happens, which is usually what I said anyway, but H will stop worrying if he hears it from a MD.
I’m sure you know this, but the ER definitely is not a place to go unless you’re worried about life and limb or have zero other options (find a good urgent care clinic near you!). Triage waits can be awful, and are the last thing you want to put a sick kid through (he’d be much better off sleeping at home), plus hospitals are full of sick people! It’s exposure to extra germs, and possibly resistant ones at that. I use that argument on my husband occasionally, too.
SC says
DH and I have some disagreement/difference in approach. He’s much more likely to want to take our kid to the doctor than I am, and to take him there immediately. I’ve tried to compromise by taking a liberal approach to calling the doctor’s office, including their on-call hours. Most of the time, it helps comfort DH that a professional can call back and tell him it’s not an emergency but we really should act quickly if the fever rises above X or the breathing sounds like Y or whatever. I’ve also just taken the baby to the doctor, or let DH take him, a couple of times when nothing was really wrong (but no ER visits yet). I figure (a) I want to respect DH’s parenting instincts, (b) it would be worse and feel personally terrible to be wrong, and (c) if the roles are for some reason reversed in the future, I want DH to listen to and respect my instincts.
SC says
To clarify, after reading some of the comments, we’ll call the pediatrician after-hours, as in 6-8 p.m., occasionally for advice on treatment or when to worry. The pediatrician’s office assures us that parents use this all the time, and I have the feeling that the doctor on call fields almost constant calls until 8 or 9. (Our pediatrician is also a social acquaintance.) But we would not call in the middle of the night unless we were contemplating going to the ER.
Meg Murry says
I am normally pretty much in the avoid the doctor if at all possible camp – with one exception. Without fail, if my kids are a little sick on Thursday and worse on Friday, if I get an appointment on Friday they are fine by the time of the appointment – but if I think to myself “oh, they are just fine” by Saturday they are much worse and we wind up in the urgent care on a good day at the ER at midnight on a bad day. Same thing with me and mastitis and thrush- 2X thought it was maybe a slight concern on Thursday, Friday was still iffy – and that was the worst weekend of my life and I was practically crying for an appointment first thing Monday morning.
Our pediatrician is also closed Wednesdays (we have to drive to the other office in the next town), so I am more cautious with an illness where daycare might say we need a note to send the kid back (pinkeye, etc).
Samantha says
This might settle after the baby is a bit older. As new parents we both used to visit the doc at every cough or cold. After many such visits when doc would conclude “drink lots of fluids and get some rest” we realized there wasnt much they would do or prescribe. So we began to think “if we go to the doc, they’ll only ask us to keep the baby home and give him fluids, so why dont we just do that”.
TL/DR – the threshold for everyone may lower over time as baby gets older, so the difference between you and spouse will likely get minimal.
DC Mom says
Do you have a travel placemat you like to use at restaurants? I have been thinking about getting something to put down on the table so that DD isn’t eating directly off the table. It doesn’t bother me that much, but it just sort of looks weird.
Mrs. Jones says
We used the plastic disposable placemats that stick to the table.
Maddie Ross says
FWIW, it never bothered me that LO ate directly off the table in most restaurants, though I would usually disinfect myself with an anti-bac wipe first. That said, I did pick up a handful of plastic stick-on covers from Chic-Fil-A each time I was there and used those occasionally. You can also buy at Target in the baby food aisle.
Cdn lawyer says
I have the summer infant one and it works great. My LO is only 7.5 months though so not sure if she will figure out how to pull it off eventually. I like that it has a little tray to hang over the table edge.
MomAnon4This says
Sounds weird but — ask the pediatrician.
My 1st kid almost never had a fever. So when our 2nd got a fever, I freaked out and called in the evening and then brought the kid in in the morning. I explained to the doctor, “I swear I’m not hypochondriac mom, I just don’t know about fevers!” and she said, Good! Bring him in! Would much rather you did that!
Also, some people I know HATE doctors’ offices, and (relatedly) swear their kid gets more sick there, in the waiting room, etc. I’d rather take the kid to the dr. office and deal with it, honestly, I don’t mind the doctors’ offices and I’m not convinced the doctor’s office is any more of a petri dish than daycare, etc.
Anon says
My breastfeed baby won’t take a bottle and I’m returning to work in a few days. Anyone dealt with this and what did you do? I’ve tried formula and expressed breast milk, as well as different bottles.
Anonymous says
Try having someone else give the bottle with you not in the room. Breastfed babies often will not take the bottle from Mom because they know they can nurse with her.
Not sure what bottles you are using. I had the best luck with Playtex dropins – a bottle including a few drop ins is less that $10 so it might be worth a try. I know a number of moms with EBF babies where they would only take drop ins and not other bottles. Use the slow flow nipple regardless of age as EBF babies are used to working harder to get the milk and may get overwhelmed with the milk from a medium or fast flow nipple.
HTH and good luck!
Anonymous says
+1. My bottle brat child will not take a bottle from me, or with me in the room, or if she can hear me at all. I basically need to not be home for it to work, and then it still doesn’t work that well.
She fought bottles for several days when she started daycare, but as her pediatrician said, the baby won’t starve itself, no matter how much it prefers nursing with mom. By midday on day 3 of her bottle strike, my baby cracked and started taking bottles at daycare. Daycare has seen this a thousand times. We sent Phillips Advent bottles but daycare insisted on Dr. Browns, so we bought a whole new set of bottles. After nearly four months in daycare, she still pretty much reverse cycles (nurses two boobs in the morning and four boobs at night; if I’m home with her all day on a weekend, she nurses nine or ten boobs, so clearly she’s not taking much in bottles at daycare), but she’s still growing on the same curve she was before she started daycare.
TL;DR: your baby will behave differently at daycare and your skilled daycare providers will make it work. Baby is not going to starve itself for want of you.
Anonymama says
Had 2 of these bottle refusers. One never ended up taking bottles, started on sippy cups around 4 months, the other would take once starving only if i wasn’t in the house.
Anonymous says
Just wanted to add something else that worked for my baby. She really like the skin to skin of nursing and would take a bottle much better from Dad or daycare provider when they were wearing a t-shirt and rested her head in the crook of their arm so the side of her face was against the skin of their upper arm vs. when they wore sweaters or long sleeves.
K. says
There is tons of advice online including what was mentioned above, but, I’d like to add something that I didn’t find online when my daughter had the same issue. She rejected the bottle the first four weeks I went back to work. It felt like FOREVER. She was pleasant about it, but I was a mess worrying. She also reversed-cycled big time. But…she did finally take the bottle. My childcare giver was very patient and kept trying all different methods and we tried about 3 different bottles and then, one day, she finally took it. I think it was a combination of not wanting/not knowing how to latch onto it. But, I wanted to share my story just because I didn’t find stories like that when we had the issue (maybe they solved it quicker or maybe they just didn’t think to post when things eventually got sorted out!)
j-non says
Yep. This was me. Luckily we tried a few weeks before i went back to work. The upshot- he didn’t like it but we kept at it. It took about 2 weeks and a lot of patience, a lot of stopping and starting and a lot of (GASP) discarded breast milk. But, once he took it, he was fine. just keep pushing through! We never tried different bottles, I don’t think that was it. There is no bottle that is like Mom, so we just used our Tommie Tippee and he is just fine now. Keep working on it and good luck!
Anonymous says
Do not buy. Your tot will pick it up and throw it. This is why you should test products before posting about them.