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Sales of Note…
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- Ann Taylor – 40% off everything
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- Zappos – 23,000+ sale items (for women)! Check out these reader-favorite workwear brands on sale, and some of our favorite kid shoe brands on sale.
- J.Crew – 25% off your purchase; up to 50% off special-occasion styles
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And — here are some of our latest threadjacks of interest – working mom questions asked by the commenters!
- If you’re a working parent of an infant with low sleep needs, how do you function at work when you’re in the throes of baby’s sleep regression?
- Should I cut my childcare down to 12 hours a month if I work from home?
- Will my baby have speech delays if we raise her bilingual?
- Has anyone given birth in a teaching hospital?
- My child eats everything, and my friends’ kids do not – how should I handle? In general, what is the best way to handle when your child has some skill/ability and your friend’s child doesn’t have that skill/ability?
- ADHD moms, give me your tips to help with things like behavior in the classroom, attention to detail, etc?
- I think I suffer from mom rage…
- My husband and kids are gone this weekend – how should I enjoy my free time?
- I’m struggling to be compassionate with a SAHM friend who complains she doesn’t have enough hours of childcare.
- If you exclusively formula fed, what tips do you have for in the hospital and coming home?
- Could I take my 4-yo and 8-yo on a 7-8 day trip to Paris, Lyon, and Madrid?
I love scarves although I don’t have many florals. To me, with their varied colors, scarves are a great way to tie a look together and bring the right colors up to your face. I have a pale pink shirt I love, but I don’t wear that color much because I don’t look great in it, so I wear it with a scarf I have that has pale pink, darker pink and the cooler blues I love and get complimented on.
Today I’m playing the pregnancy card at my biz cas office with a blue t-shirt and rasberry cardigan – pulled together with a scarf with these colors, darker blue & lighter pink. I am NOT stylish or color-savvy but I feel like I totally look like I’m put together and did not get #pregninsomnia last night.
Re: pregninsomnia. I woke up at 2:30 am and couldn’t get back to sleep. Decided to do actual work for a few hours to bill. Yay, working mamas!
Been there with the #preginsomnia! It stinks the next day but I can’t say I don’t love the “found” hours of productivity.
I have been trying to expand my scarf collection, too, to deal with early pregnancy concealment and wardrobe awkwardness. This particular scarf isn’t my style, but I’ve been browsing the Norstrom Rack website. Can anyone recommend another good source for reasonably priced, reasonable quality scarves? Or a favorite brand that I can search for?
I’ve found a lot of very cute scarves at Anthropologie. Usually on sale. I’ve also found some good ones at Gap and on Rue La La.
I’ve also been trying to wear scarves more to hide that 17 wk belly is starting to show. I picked up a couple on Etsy. Seller was dailyaccessoriez and shipping was super fast.
I’ve hit the phase where I look more lumpy than pregnant. I Think it’s worse with no2 than it was with no1 because she already killed any abdominal muscles I had.
Oooh thanks! I love etsy, but seller quality varies a lot. Really good to have a recommendation!!
Also thanks to JJ above, I’ve also been considering an Anthropologie order for a couple of reversible seamless tanks based on a couple of blog recommendations for 1/2 trimester clothing. So that’s a great fit.
Mine are usually from when I’ve traveled abroad – India and Thailand have beautiful textiles, you might be able to search Etsy or eBay with these terms for affordability. I think I have a few from South Africa, too.
Has anyone had success (or failure) with an OK to Wake clock? DS wakes up at 5 a.m., like clockwork, but some mornings he will wake up at 4:30 or 4:45 and scream for us to come get him. The 5 a.m. wake-ups are fine for our schedule, but I really can’t handle it creeping back to 4:30 or 4:45. His pediatrician recommended one of those clocks that turns green when it’s ok to wake up, but they get mixed reviews on Amazon. Anyone have any good or bad luck with those? He’s 20 months old and has a decent grasp on language.
(former) preg 3L says
Alphamom raves about them. I’d trust the reviews there — she did a post on different OK to Wake clocks but I can’t find it atm.
We have the Teach Me Time one that she talks about and we really like it. I think we started when our child was around 3 and he caught on pretty quickly. Now that he is older, he likes pressing the button to hear what time it is.
We started using one when my oldest was about 2, for the same reasons. It worked for about a week, and then we’d hear the owl (ours was an owl) being thrown down the stairs, over the railings, etc. We would ask him if his owl was green and he’d happily yell “No!” Soo….it’s not working so well.
Thanks everyone! I just ordered the Teach Me Time clock. I’ll report back on how it goes. Hopefully it won’t get thrown across the room like JJ’s owl!
Ok, so I’ve got momma worries – my husband moved out in October, and he had been spending a few evenings a week with our daughter eating dinner at our house, and I was usually around. I finally was fed up with taking care of him (I was grocery shopping for him, preparing food that he would then eat, cleaning up after him, he left his laundry in my hamper, etc) so we decided that he would take her to his apartment instead. It’s only two weeknights and one weekend afternoon and evening, so maybe 9 hours total a week? Fast forward a week and a half later, and she is starting to freak out whenever I leave and when I’m around, she only wants to be held and cuddle with me (totally unlike my little independent peanut). She is fine at daycare and apparently OK when she is with her dad. She is a little over a year; is this normal separation anxiety, or is she needing more momma time? The parenting time recommendations say that overnights with the non-primary parent shouldn’t start until 18 months, so of course I’m worrying that we’ve pushed her too fast.
And I’ll talk to her pediatrician if it lasts another week. Thanks in advance.
My son went through a huge mama stage from about 12 months through 18 months, where he would freak out if I left and be all over me when we were together. Could you strike a compromise where her dad comes over for dinner at your house, but you order take-out and don’t do all the other things for him? She’ll probably get to a stage in a few months where she’s ok with more separation and you can reevaluate then.
My son was the same way – 11months to about 14 months he would totally freak out when I left daycare drop offs, heck when I left the room sometimes. It abated when he got a little more language (and just got older) but I believe its also totally developmentally appropriate.
It’s a change AND she’s changing, and you’re changing, too – I’m sure all this is stressful. It seems like a normal reaction, though I don’t know how long or how bad it gets before you declare NOT normal.
How was the adjustment of returning to work for you all? I’ve been back at work about 3 weeks now and it seems to be going fairly well. My daughter (6 mo) is doing well at daycare and I feel very comfortable with the care she is receiving there. The issue is that I feel I am being judged for adjusting fairly well. I am not regularly contacting the daycare to check in. I am not crying at my desk. I am not wishing I am home with my baby all the time. I actually really enjoy my job and my mindset is that if I’m 100% at work when I’m here I will be more productive and be able to enjoy those after hours with my baby instead of feeling like work is hanging over me. Yet the looks I get when I respond to questions about how I’m doing (I generally answer very vaguely that I’m doing fine) is frustrating.
I’ve been back at work since last spring, and during that time have only had maybe 3 or 4 total days of being sad to not be home with my kiddo. Mostly when she is under the weather or had a rough morning and I’m feeling guilty about dropping her off at daycare…but I have always been able to send a quick message to daycare and gotten speedy reassurances that she is fine and happy. I think some of it depends on the kiddo too. Mine LOVES daycare and has since the first day we dropped her off.
I would also caution you to not jump to conclusions about what other people are thinking about you – I’ve had a couple coworkers return from leave and assume that people are judging them for various things, when they actually weren’t. If people are sharing their experiences of sadness in dropping off baby at daycare, maybe try saying, “Oh yes, it can be so difficult. On the other hand, it’s such a relief to [eat lunch with both hands, have adult conversations, do XYZ challenging project, etc].” I found that helped validate other people’s experiences but still convey that I was happy to be at work.
I think this is a scenario where the amount you’re affected by other people’s behavior is coextensive with how much you let yourself be affected by other people’s behavior.
I could not handle maternity leave and ended up going back to work part-time several months earlier than planned. We were fortunate to snag a spot at an excellent day care center where I honestly thought my daughter was getting more interaction and brain stimulation than I would have been able to provide as a full-time SAHM, and I had no qualms at all about leaving her. In fact, I felt guilty for not feeling guilty about leaving her. When people would ask me how I was handling being back at work, my stock response was, “I’m really enjoying being able to eat a snack or go to the bathroom whenever I want!”
It is really a catch-22 for moms. On the one hand, we are expected to be all torn up about leaving our precious bundles with someone else while we are at work. On the other hand, I feel like we are in some ways held to a higher standard than men and childless women in terms of availability. When my male co-workers decide to work from home or take time off, their commitment to the job is not questioned. On the other hand, when I work from home so I can focus on a project or take time off for whatever reason, it is assumed that I am not committed to my job because I am a mommy.
+1 I also “escaped” back to work on a art-time basis when the opportunity arose. In hindsight, I have mixed feelings about doing so. I do wish I could have stayed home longer (I receive no paid leave and couldn’t afford to take unpaid leave), but at the same time, I think I was turning into a basket case with the constant nursing. As the saying goes, “you do you.” Do what you need and don’t worry about perceptions.
The good thing about this is that it’ll pass in a few weeks, also most likely people are just asking to be polite as well. I felt similarly (heck, I didn’t even know I was supposed to call day care to check in!), and when asked I just joked about how happy I was to drop her off at daycare. I’ve been back for two months and it really doesn’t come up anymore.
Also, I was a bit surprised that after the first month or so, I did get sad about being back at work. It’s a much better fit for me than being home with her all day, but once the novelty of being back wore off, it did get harder.
Does anyone have recommendations for a good umbrella stroller? We’re looking for something lighter for travel and for the summer months, when we don’t have to worry about ice and snow. We’re considering the Uppababy G-Luxe and G-Lite. Anyone have experience with these, or thoughts about another good one? Many thanks!
We’ve had the G-Luxe for two boys now and multiple plane and car trips and absolutely love it. It’s much sturdier than the other umbrella strollers that we tried. The seat was also very padded and the basket underneath was bigger than I expected for an umbrella stroller. We took it to Disney World for a week and had no complaints. Love how easy it is to fold up and expand. I’d highly recommend it.
I haven’t bought it yet, but am planning on a GLuxe. We had the cheapo ones from Babies R Us with my first two, and they were a little short for me to push comfortably but otherwise fine for what they were. I’d just like a little more functionality.
We love the G-Luxe, its really easy to work, and very padded so it was very comfy for my son to nap in. It also reclines really well which is a nice feature.
Love the gluxe. We also have a citymini. I love the lighter weight of the gluxe and find it easy to maneuver. We lost the cup holder the one time we flew with it. Our fault for not removing it first. Also, we are urbanites so use our strollers pretty heavily.
Anyone care to commiserate with me today? I’m trying to telework with a fussy 6-month-old in the house. My husband is home,and to his credit, is trying to calm down the baby. But he hasn’t been successful. Not sure how I’m ever going to get this work done!
Me. My 6 month old isn’t being fussy, but my husband is out of town (and stuck there thanks to this snow), so when she’s awake, I can maybe set her down for 3-5 minutes before she wants me. Luckily she’s embracing the nap today and seems to be in a good mood.
I, however, feel like I’m sucking at both the parenting thing and the productive employee thing.
Two Cents says
I would like to buy something to commemorate the birth of my kids (I have a 2 year old and a newborn). I’m thinking jewelry but am open to other ideas (I’d like to wear it or have it on hand daily). With my older son, I was planning to buy a ring in his birthstone but never got around to it, and now I have 2 kids. Any ideas? I feel Etsy would be good for something like this but I am overwhelmed by Etsy. Would like to spend no more than $300.
I just ordered a necklace from Love and Victory. I’ll report back once I receive it. I think I may add a birthstone charm to the necklace at a later date.
Let the other attorney know that I have to leave at 1:30 for another OB appointment. Her comment? “Wow, I’ve never heard of someone having so many doctor’s appointments when they were pregnant, not even my friend that was throwing up all the time like you!”
Um. Sorry? I’m 13 weeks today and I’ve been in for a 6 week dating u/s, another one at 8 weeks, and then I left work 20 minutes early one day to get blood work done. That’s it…
For the first appointment I just came into work late and left late (got here by 9:30) and for the other one I was working from home that day anyway and the appointment was at 4:30. So…I haven’t missed any work at all…
That’s about the stupidest thing a coworker could possibly say to you. Other than commenting on your weight I suppose. Hope your appt went well.
I think you should puke on her.
Wow, I’ve never heard of someone questioning the appointment schedule prescribed by my doctor. This is stupid. If you had any other medical condition, would this person feel entitled to comment on the frequency of your treatments/check ups? That’s between you and your doctor, and maybe HR if you’re not following company policy on taking sick time.
And btw, they just get more frequent so her vast experience obviously isn’t taking into account the weekly-plus appointments towards the end! Sheesh. Don’t talk to hormonal pregnant ladies like that.
Thanks ladies! I’m definitely not her direct report, and totally following company policy (working remotely is permitted, so I just go to the appointment, go home, hop online and work a little later to get stuff done). HR has already said something to her to back off, but she still thinks that “joking” about it is ok. Hm….well, at least the appointment went well!