Nursing/Postpartum Tuesday: Sublime Nursing Sports Bra

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Starting up my exercise routine postpartum was tough for so many reasons, including working it in with constant nursing and pumping.

While this nursing sports bra might not erase all the barriers to postpartum workouts, it does take care of at least one of them. Perfect for lower impact activities (think yoga, pilates, or hiking), this bra is made from breathable, moisture-wicking fabric. This pullover style has clip-down cups for easy access so you can nurse/pump with ease.

It comes in eight colors and wide range of sizes.

Kindred Bravely’s Sublime Nursing Sports Bra is $44.99 and available in sizes Small to XX-Large Busty.

Sales of note for 9.10.24

(See all of the latest workwear sales at Corporette!)

Kid/Family Sales

  • Carter’s – Birthday sale, 40-50% off & extra 20% off select styles
  • Hanna Andersson – Up to 50% off all baby; up to 40% off all Halloween
  • J.Crew Crewcuts Extra 30% off sale styles
  • Old Navy – 40% off everything
  • Target – BOGO 25% off select haircare, up to 25% off floor care items; up to 30% off indoor furniture up to 20% off TVs

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A few recs for Lego kids. We’ve been liking The Lego Ideas Book, a big book with all sorts of inspiration in it. It may be out of print but I bought it on Better World Books. I was feeling a bit annoyed that my son was so focused on building sets and then abandoning them, and this has served as good fodder for more creative play.

And I have an IKEA serving tray which has been great for corralling Lego pieces and work in progress, I think I’m going to get a few more and slide them under the couch? They don’t contain everything but like masks, 80% containment is better than 0% containment.

Any other lego tricks?

Weaning advice/stories please! I have a trip planned at the end of April when baby will be 9 months old and want to be done breastfeeding/pumping before then. Currently pumping at 3x a day at work and otherwise breastfeeding on demand (including one 2 am feed). We’re both still really enjoying breastfeeding but I definitely want to be free of it for the trip so how on earth do I do this?

Repost from yesterday since it was late in the day. Not sure what I’m looking for other than commiseration. After a traumatic post partum period (including an unexpected surgery under GA at 5 weeks postpartum), I feel like I’m seeing clearly for the very first time, in my late thirties, that my mom just truly lacks empathy or the ability to be there for me, and is a narcissist. She is masterful at playing the guilt card, playing the blame game, is constantly martyring herself and jealous of the energy I put into friends and in laws, etc. She lives 5 minutes away and was not supportive at all during my maternity leave. She practically raised my niece but hasn’t watched my son for one single day since he was born (but is offended if I go visit my in laws with him). I don’t feel like cutting her off is an option but I’m also done with metered visits that are followed up with a nasty email or text because I don’t see her enough. What do you all with unsupportive local family do? I can’t help but feel jealous of friends whose parents are emotionally supportive and help out with the baby all the time. I could even do without the help if I didn’t feel like I was just an emotional punching bag for her. I work full time in biglaw and it’s just taking up so much real estate in my head. She complains that we aren’t closer “like parents and children should be” but she isn’t willing to put in literally any of the work to make that relationship happen, it’s all on me, and it has been for years without any reciprocation.

My 4 year old’s birthday is next week. We’re in the Midwest where the weather in February is usually miserable and no one we know is doing indoor things with unvaxxed kids, so we assumed there was no way we could have a party. It’s unexpectedly going to be 55 and sunny on Sunday. Should I try to put together a last minute outdoor party? We went to one outdoor party in the fall but otherwise have not been invited to any parties since Covid. I would probably say no gifts (I feel too gift-grabby otherwise) and just invite people to meet us in the park for cake and play. I’m nervous no one will come – it’s short notice and my kid doesn’t seem to have a lot of close buddies in school, other than the one kid whose party we went to last fall. Part of me feels like we should just skip it and have a proper party next year. On the other hand, I felt this way last year and then a real party wasn’t possible this year so who knows what next year will look, especially since there seems to be a surge every winter.

Just a random recommendation for target’s mid rise drapey maternity jogger pants. They are amazing throughout pregnancy, postpartum, and tbh I kept wearing them for years after my last baby. Nice enough to wear to the store but comfy enough for sleeping. I now have four pairs. I’d say they run true to size, maybe a bit big — I am a 6/8 pre-pregnancy and the small fit well (and I do not like things too tight).

Any gift ideas for a good friend with morning sickness (second trimester)? She is a teacher so is on her feet a lot. TIA!

Parents of current or former 2nd graders, can I get a gut check? Our 2nd grade teacher gives in-class quizzes, and our son has gotten a “0” on some of these as he somehow fails to turn them in (or puts them in the wrong place?). The teacher says it is son’s responsibility to ensure his quiz is turned in to the appropriate basket when asked. I don’t really understand this position – she grades them the same day, so she knows if he was there or not, but maybe it’s age appropriate? We are frustrated and I’m trying to understand if it’s reasonable.

I’m in a dinner rut. Help! What are you favorite, vegetarian/pescatarian dinner recipes?
I usually do a black bean taco bowl night, pasta night, dal and rice night, pizza night, and salmon night most weeks.

Valentine’s update: did all of your kids come home with a Halloween-style haul from valentine’s day? A poster yesterday mentioned that they sent only a card, while others sent in whole gift bags. My kids basically had a winter halloween. Is this the norm now?

Not sure if I’m looking for advice or just commiseration. My husband is fantastic in just about every way but he has a total blind spot for how neat/organized he thinks he is vs. how neat/organized he actually is.

He’s not a slob but he is way more utilitarian than aesthetic about things. I feel like all I do is come up with “systems” for putting stuff away/organizing and it all falls apart within days/weeks/months because he will clean up by just putting things wherever is closest/can fit when he’s tired. For example, we have a big storage armoire in the living room for all the kids toys/magnatiles/crafts/etc. I organize it, separate stuff in clear stacked boxes and then within 2-3 weeks it’s back to being the kind of thing where it’s just a jumbled mess inside because my kids are too young and he is too oblivious to put things away nicely. This goes for every closet, cabinet, etc. So he’ll put away the kids’ laundry but shove it in so the drawer barely opens or put the sweatpants in the jeans drawer and the jeans in the sweatpants drawer. To him it’s all pants.

This also happens with areas on top of things, which drives me crazy – so the credenza near the front door always ends up littered with his mail, receipts, etc., he has cords everywhere, he buys books to read and leaves them unfinished around the house because he’s “reading them” … I specifically got a credenza with big drawers that open easily and put a big old tray inside for each of us to have a place to drop random stuff at the end of the day and within a month his tray had overflown to make the entire drawer a giant junk drawer and this has only gotten worse since. We have a small place and two kids and probably too much stuff but the stuff and the kids aren’t going away for a while. WFH, even occasional as it has become, has obviously made this worse. I am exhausted by having either clutter everywhere or having to organize and reorganize constantly. But when I tell him this he either says he’ll try to do better and does but then defaults or we end up bickering because he thinks I am accusing him of not doing anything or being a slob, which he isn’t, or he just says my standards are unrealistic. As he sees it, he cleans up all the time – he does the dishes, he makes the bed, he does the laundry and he puts away kids toys daily. This is all true! He also tends to know where his stuff is more than me (think of your coworkers with a messy desk but who know that they document they need is in the pile in the left corner) so he thinks he’s the “organized one.” But he leaves random sh*t everywhere and puts things away badly in a way that quickly makes all the order I make pointless. I know some of this is a me issue – my standards may need to come down for this time of my life even if i don’t think my standards are all that exceptional or high to begin with. But how do I get thru to him that I don’t want to have to re-organize the drawers every 2 weeks because he decided to do the laundry and now everything is a jumbled mess. I swear he means well but at the end of the day when we both worked all day and are tired and want to put the kids to bed and have 1-2 hours of couch time he doesn’t have the bandwidth for it. I’ve tried all the “just give him a box/basket/drawer ideas.” I just feel like I am in a catch 22 – like I can’t complain because he does a lot but my complaint is with how he does it.

Before anyone says to get a cleaning service, we have one. But they don’t help with clutter. It’s actually getting ready for them that we tend to argue about all this.

Okay, those with full time nannies, help me out here. We had a fantastic nanny for six years. She moved on for personal reasons and our new nanny who has been with us for six months just isn’t working out. We have four kids, but she rarely has to watch all four (usually has one to two, sometimes three just around dinner). Also we pay her above market for our area. DH and I both work full time, but he also travels.

This morning was running out the door with the two oldest (DH out of town) and asked her if she could feed hte dog and let her into the backyard. Not walk her! Just let her out and let her back in – it takes two minutes. She sent me a text asking me to give her more of a heads up if she’s expected to care for an additional dog or child next time or she’d expect more pay. Similarly last week she was at the park with five year old and newborn. Five year old’s best friend’s parent asked if she could keep an eye on friend too for forty five minutes – party was full of other parents, she’d just be the person if he needed to ask to go to the bathroom or something. I asked if she’d be okay with that and she again said she could but she wasn’t happy.

It feels like these aren’t big asks, and it’s creating a lot of stress. Today I could really use her staying forty minutes late – that’s all I need – but she gets annoyed when we don’t clear these things with her weeks before.

So did we have a unicorn nanny before and this is more the norm, or is it somewhere in the middle? We’re going to talk to her about how we need more flexibility, either to let a dog out in the backyard, or to do a favor for a friend, but I really think we may need to start looking for someone else. Which is such a disappointment. Kids think she’s okay, I doubt they’ll be upset. This is definitely her career. She doesn’t have kids herself, so I was hoping she’d occasionally be able to stay later and be a bit more flexible for that reason.

My just-turned-5yo is struggling with appropriate behavior in school. She was in daycare her whole life until pandemic, then spent 1.5 years at home with just us and her twin sister (with a few weeks of camp last summer), and has now been in full-time in-person preK since September. Her teacher says she wants to talk to us about how Kid is still not remembering to keep her hands to herself. The sub that is regularly in her class says Kid says lots of mean things to other kids, including “I want to k*ll you” which we also get at home sometimes.

Any advice on how to respond when these things happen at home or strategies for school? We usually go with “that’s not a nice thing to say” but don’t make a big deal about it–I’m not sure if that’s too weak a reaction or the right call because then she’ll learn she can get more attention by saying certain things.

We are about to restart the IVF transfer process as we look towards adding our second child to the family (done with retrievals, so it’s just FETs until it works). We have an amazing daughter and we planned to have 2-3 children and still want 2-3 children and yet I’m STILL suddenly a bundle of nerves about how much her world will change, no more 100% attention from mama and dada, etc. etc. I was fortunate to have a very healthy and uneventful first pregnancy and so hope for the same this time around, but I know that my “evening sickness” will probably interfere with bedtimes/bathtimes some nights and already feel guilty. This is normal, right?

I did not send anything for my 5 year old’s daycare class for Valentine’s Day yesterday. I remembered late Sunday evening but had already spent the day at a friend’s birthday party and soccer, and just did not have the energy to go back to the store or do something homemade. Both DH and I decided to pass on Valentines for school this year. I know, this is fine, and I’m at peace with the decision…kind of. I only felt a little bad when my son came back with a box of cards and gifts. FWIW, only about half the kids seem to have brought something.

We did the right thing (at least for us)….right?