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Reusable bags, once something used to pack groceries in, have now been banned at some grocery stores (including the Trader Joe’s by me) and have become a replacement for our nice leather bags that we once used. I have still been using my crossbody (non-washable) bag, but I have been realizing how much I inadvertently touch it while I’m grocery shopping. I’d love to own one of these washable nylon bags to just throw in my washing machine after coming inside from the outside world. These come in a bunch of fun color combos and in two sizes, and they don’t sacrifice making a statement for being functional. The bags are available on Hay.com for $38 for medium and $45 for large. Six-Color BagSales of note for 4.18.24
(See all of the latest workwear sales at Corporette!)
- Ann Taylor – 50% off full-price dresses, jackets & shoes; $30 off pants & skirts; extra 50% off sale styles
- Banana Republic Factory – Up to 50% off everything; extra 20% off purchase
- Eloquii – 50% off select styles; 60% off swim; up to 40% off everything else
- J.Crew – Mid-Season Sale: Extra 60% off sale styles; up to 50% off spring-to-summer styles
- Lands’ End – 30% off full-price styles
- Loft – Spring Mid-Season Sale: Up to 50% off 100s of styles
- Nordstrom: Free 2-day shipping for a limited time (eligible items)
- Talbots – Spring Sale: 40% off + extra 15% off all markdowns; 30% off new T by Talbots
- Zappos – 29,000+ women’s sale items! (check out these reader-favorite workwear brands on sale, and some of our favorite kids’ shoe brands on sale)
Kid/Family Sales
- Carter’s – Up to 70% off baby items; 50% off toddler & kid deals & 40% off everything else
- Hanna Andersson – Up to 50% off spring faves; 25% off new arrivals; up to 30% off spring
- J.Crew Crewcuts – Up to 60% off sale styles; up to 50% off kids’ spring-to-summer styles
- Old Navy – 30% off your purchase; up to 75% off clearance
- Target – Car Seat Trade-In Event (ends 4/27); BOGO 25% off select skincare products; up to 40% off indoor furniture; up to 20% off laptops & printers
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And — here are some of our latest threadjacks of interest – working mom questions asked by the commenters!
- If you’re a working parent of an infant with low sleep needs, how do you function at work when you’re in the throes of baby’s sleep regression?
- Should I cut my childcare down to 12 hours a month if I work from home?
- Will my baby have speech delays if we raise her bilingual?
- Has anyone given birth in a teaching hospital?
- My child eats everything, and my friends’ kids do not – how should I handle? In general, what is the best way to handle when your child has some skill/ability and your friend’s child doesn’t have that skill/ability?
- ADHD moms, give me your tips to help with things like behavior in the classroom, attention to detail, etc?
- I think I suffer from mom rage…
- My husband and kids are gone this weekend – how should I enjoy my free time?
- I’m struggling to be compassionate with a SAHM friend who complains she doesn’t have enough hours of childcare.
- If you exclusively formula fed, what tips do you have for in the hospital and coming home?
- Could I take my 4-yo and 8-yo on a 7-8 day trip to Paris, Lyon, and Madrid?
pandemic daycare lunches? says
Okay, this should be a super simple problem to solve, but I’m stressing out anyway. My kids go back to daycare next week. Various pandemic rules mean that nothing can be brought in from home, including lunch boxes or any sort of reusable container, so we’re required to pack 2 snacks and lunch in disposable packaging, aka ziploc or paper bags. Up until now, our lunch strategy has been 90% toss leftovers from dinner into the bento box and call it a day. Now we can’t include most of those things, because it’s impossible to eat pasta, salad, soup, etc. out of a ziploc bag when you’re 3. This is also super entitled of me, I know, but I’m so frustrated by the requirement that I need to use a dozen plastic bags a day just for my kids’ food when normally we try to limit our use of ziplocs.
Anyway, I figure we can do sandwiches and cut fruit and veg for lunch and crackers or muffins for snack, but any other ideas?
anon says
We will often reuse other plastic packaging by washing it. Could you wash out sour cream, cream cheese, take out containers, etc, and reuse for daycare? It probably wouldn’t cover every day, but would get you some meals.
pandemic daycare lunches? says
Ooh, that’s an interesting idea. Nothing ‘reuseable’ is allowed (even if we promise to run it through the dishwasher every night) but there’s a chance that would count as disposable.
Go for it says
Waxed paper is your friend here . It is much better environmentally, can be folded pouch style and opens to be a sort of plate.
anon says
Waxed paper is not more environmentally friendly than re-using plastic packaging that would otherwise be recycled/thrown out.
Anon says
It will break down faster than plastic, right? And takes less energy/water to produce?
anon says
Yes, but you’re not buying sour cream to dump it and use the container. You’re using the sour cream and then reusing something that already exists. Wax paper has to be manufactured.
CPA Lady says
What if you got cardboard clam-shell boxes or takeout containers? You can get compostable ones. That would at least allow you to pack the leftovers most of the time, and would be one less thing to think about. These are obviously much more expensive than ziplocks, but it might be worth it to you to at least do for lunch? Or it might not be, and that’s fine too.
And what if you packed, for example, prepackage cheeze its or goldfish or something like that for one of the snacks? I mean, it is still a disposable container, but it’s not a ziplock.
pandemic daycare lunches? says
Also a good idea, thanks! And yeah, we don’t usually buy prepackaged snacks just because it’s cheaper to buy the giant Costco box of goldfish and dole it out ourselves, but for my sanity during these times we should probably start doing it.
SC says
I swore I’d never buy prepackaged snacks because they feel so wasteful–expensive and bad for the environment. The day I started, I almost cried happy tears.
anon says
Would they let you send in pasta in a bag and a paper plate? Then child could dump the contents of the bag onto the disposable plate.
Clementine says
Plug here for waxed paper and waxed paper sandwich bags. Also suggest tortillas with anything inside, yogurt (maybe squeezable yogurts?), cheese sticks or babybel type cheeses, individually wrapped nutri grain bars, raisins.
pandemic daycare lunches? says
I don’t know why waxed paper didn’t occur to me! Thanks.
Anon says
I have paper soup containers I use when making food in bulk that may work . Look for things like https://www.amazon.com/Pack-Kraft-Compostable-Paper-Vented/dp/B07VCTZL1V/ or https://www.amazon.com/Belinlen-Disposable-Medium-Takeout-Container/dp/B07QTH7K2H
Anon says
I have a comment in mod but do a search for paper soup containers or ice cream cups.
CCLA says
We had the same issue. We used plastic bento containers. I realize this is horrible for the environment; it is what worked for a few weeks in this crazy pandemic time. While it wouldn’t work for soup (I like the sour cream container idea), I can attest it does work for yogurt since it stays upright, and veggie sticks stay crunchy in the other compartment. Link to follow. We also bought compostable flatware to send in. A few weeks in, daycare has started allowing reusable bentos again – they keep them in the fridge so the usual insulated lunch bags don’t go back and forth every day, just the box itself which gets washed.
CCLA says
https://www.amazon.com/Freshware-Containers-Compartment-Stackable-Dishwasher/dp/B073TRZ91C/ref=sr_1_2?dchild=1&keywords=plastic+bento+box&qid=1593711351&sr=8-2
IHeartBacon says
What about disposable paper or plastic cups covered with foil or plastic wrap so you can do leftovers? You can send with a plastic fork or spoon.
anon says
Interesting NYT article this morning that is ringing true for us. I am beyond stressed about this fall and figuring out how to educate my kids at home while working FT. It all just feels so impossible.
https://www.nytimes.com/2020/07/02/business/covid-economy-parents-kids-career-homeschooling.html
NoVa Mom says
I was just coming here to post this same thing. I nodded along to nearly every point made in this article.
Anon says
Same – Deb Perelman (of Smitten Kitchen) hitting the nail on the head – I actually thought I had read some of it before because the language was similar to her vent on an insta-story she posted last week.
Anon says
This is written by the author of Smitten Kitchen, just in case anyone is interested in that tidbit.
Anon says
I’ve seen a lot of, ‘why do working parents hate teachers’ articles lately too, trying to make the ‘counterpoint’ (it isn’t really a counterpoint, everyone has a valid gripe here) that while studies have shown that kids are at lower risk of getting sick and transmitting COVID19, teachers are not and many teachers are over 50 … main thrust of those being, ‘why is your desire for free childcare more important than my right to live.’ Sheesh.
I don’t hate teachers. I vote in favor of every tax increase that supports schools. But if the rest of us need to get back to work (or be fired), and if other workers who aren’t able to work remotely have been working this whole time (medical staff, grocery workers, postal and delivery service, etc. etc.), why is it unreasonable teachers to figure out how to get teachers back to work safely too?
Boston Legal Eagle says
It’s not our desire for “free” childcare (free in quotes as it’s paid for by tax dollars), it’s our desire to give our kids the best quality of life. And this involves going to school, socializing with peers and learning from trained educators, not parents who resent being home and can’t effectively homeschool.
This may get me flamed, but given that we aren’t successfully containing the virus, we’re going to have to make choices that involve risks one way or the other. Shouldn’t we be choosing the youngest among us to have the best quality of life? They are the future. Taking into account as much precautions as we can to protect the vulnerable, but there will have to be risks. However, I know that teachers’ unions are strong and will be trying to protect their members without doing a full risk assessment on the impact on kids.
Anonymous says
WOW
This attitude is why teachers are up in arms. They are professionals doing a job not sacrificial lambs
Anonymous says
I have kids in school and I not see any meaningful learning done since schools closed for 4th/5th graders. It didn’t pass the laugh test. I did a lot teaching and reteaching. But that’s not MY job — if I wanted to exclusively home school, I’d have arranged my life to do that (and gone to a very PT job) and have had allied families to help and join up with along the way (my area has lot of hippie home schoolers and my-kid-does-elite-sports-or-is-acting home schoolers and religious homeschoolers.
Teachers have not been sweating it out like the rest of us have been doing. I was so disgusted that I would up teaching a Scout merit badge via zoom so that these kids might actually learn something.
Lana Del Raygun says
Well, one answer (apart from the fact that kids are really bad at basic things like “not sneezing directly into your face”) is that healthcare, postal, delivery, and grocery workers haven’t actually been safe. America just decided to treat essential workers as disposable.
But yeah, I really hate the way parents and teachers (and different groups of workers in general) are pitted against one another. It lets bosses and government off the hook for solutions they could provide, like paid leave, and oh, I don’t know, testing and tracing? And the hard feelings will outlast the pandemic.
Realist says
Yes! I have raised concerns about teachers, but remain just as concerned for kids. I have many problems with the Covid response, but a big problem is priorities. We should have prioritized schools. If that meant bars and hair salons and offices had to stay closed, that is what should have happened. I’m furious at fed govt right now.
Anonymous says
Pitting groups of citizens against one other is a tactic oppressive regimes use to prevent the groups from uniting against their true, common enemy. Just saying.
IHeartBacon says
This is very true.
avocado says
I don’t understand why parents and teachers are on opposite sides of this debate. The interests of both groups are actually pretty well aligned. Keeping kids safe also keeps teachers safe, and the same terrible distance “learning” programs have frustrated both parents and teachers. The problem is that returning to school is being cast as an either/or proposition. Either we can keep kids safe, or we can get them back in the classroom. Even the AAP has stated that safety precautions are too burdensome so we should prioritize getting kids back in the classroom and abandon masks and distancing when these precautions are inconvenient. But if we come up with a reasonable program that allows parents to choose full-time high-quality distance learning or full-time classroom learning, everyone will be safer and have a better education and better working conditions. If some fraction of teachers and kids go to a fully on line program, the at-risk or risk-averse teachers can teach remotely full time. They will only have to teach one set of courses, all on line. The kids and teachers who remain In school will have more space and should be required to wear masks and eye coverings. These teachers can teach as they always have and won’t have to spend extra time preparing on-line materials. Win-win.
The part-time hybrid programs are ridiculous. Everyone suffers, no one’s risk is reduced in any meaningful way.
Anonymous says
I am seriously thinking of enrolling my kids in an exclusively on-line school. I know we have them for high school and it works. I will need something that works for my younger kids or it will be me who does the work (and I certainly didn’t get any of my tax $ back once I was providing more daily instruction time *2 kids than the official teachers were going (b/c they just sent links to Khan Academy for math)). And they way they kept changing dial-ins and not being aware that many parents have 2 kids doing things simultaneously, it was like not making working moms (mainly) sanity or need to earn a living matter into the equation at all. We were supposed to get 2 hours day of meaningful work after the first two weeks as they figured it out and it was a complete joke.
Anonymous says
Our state offers a program through the vendor K12 for free at all grade levels, in addition to its own free on-line middle and high school programs. Not great, but better than nothing.
Anon says
I’m a bit irritated by the teachers thing. Hospitals have plenty of staff members that are just as vulnerable, and they’ve somehow managed to make it work. And most hospital workers aren’t doctors – it takes a lot of grunt work to run a hospital. (See also, just about any other essential business.)
In the short term, sure, it’s not the end of the world to close schools, while it would have been to close hospitals or grocery stores, etc. But we’re past the short term now. In the long term, lack of education and the social supports of school are one of the worst things I can imagine. And I’m not talking about my kids – they have a stay at home dad and access to any distance-education resource you can imagine. The lack of care for kids who aren’t so lucky is shocking to me.
Anon says
This. Also, if I had to chose between going to work with a stable group of say 25 kids who have statistically been shown to have low infection and transition and going to work with a bunch of 20-30 year olds who are out at bars, I’d chose the former every day of the week and twice on Sunday.
I have several relatives in the 60+ age group who are teachers. They aren’t super worried about returning to school given the low transmission risk. They are much more worried about their spouses who are returning to work and interacting with other adults (far riskier).
I don’t think we should treat teachers as sacrificial lambs, but the reality is not everyone can work from home. Teaching is one of those jobs. I’m not ok with an entire generation losing out on meaningful education and social interaction to protect (and debatable what the actual real risk to these teachers are) a few. Some teachers may not return to the classroom, just like plenty of other workers in every industry are being laid off or quitting their jobs because they aren’t comfortable working from home. I don’t know why teachers should get special treatment in that sense. To the extent possible, I’d like schools to work with teachers who can do remote teaching (perhaps certain high school subjects) to allow them to do so but the reality of the job description for most is that it can’t be done remotely. It’s unfortunate but I don’t know why it’s any different than the other millions of jobs that can’t be done remotely and people are getting laid off if they aren’t going to return to work.
Anonymous says
Exactly.
Anon says
I agree. I do feel bad for teachers to an extent but that isn’t going to stop me from insisting that schools find a real solution for kids to keep learning in person, particularly given the strong statements by the AAP. Also, online learning was not at all adequate and it seemed like some teachers didn’t even try, just giving kids weekly assignments and no other actual teaching or discussions. I think there are many families and kids suffering in silence who absolutely need school. That’s what the AAP recognizes.
avocado says
Our school district was actually the culprit behind the cr@ppy distance learning, not the teachers. The district mandated that there be only one set of on-line materials per grade, all in paper packets that could be downloaded as PDFs or picked up in hard copy. Individual teachers were not supposed to do anything extra. A few of the high school teachers surreptitiously held optional Zoom sessions, but only one of my kid’s teachers did. All of my teacher friends were as frustrated with the whole thing as the parents.
Anonymous says
I agree too, and my mom, whom I love dearly, is a 64 year old teacher. One of her hobbies right now is making a ton of masks in fun kid fabrics so her students next year will always have one available.
I do think the quality of online instruction varied widely as a result of district policies as much as between individual teachers. Our county’s school district had a terrible plan that included zero live instruction for elementary school for the first 2 months, and even perfect execution of it was totally inadequate.
Anonymous says
Teachers are the most visible to the parents, so when the room mom sends out the weekly zoom call-in info, it seems that that should have been the job of the teacher or the school but never a parent’s job. Our principal is worse than our worst teacher (our assistant principal is great), our counselor just deals with chronic truants and getting people signed up for free lunches (so nothing academic). Our district — if it’s not on the 11:00 news, they don’t see things are a problem. They all had a part in our s*cky experience and failure is absolutely an orphan. There is not going to be any post-mortem on this (they will note if their enrollment #s go down compared to # of school aged children present in the district) and only then might they start caring. Civic leaders made a show of using public schools during integration and cross-city busing; but this generations of leaders (often those same kids who were on a bus) never darken the doors of public schools or even charter schools. They vote with their well-shod feet and private school it is (9 years of private school then high school is often boarding school).
Anonymous says
For me, I think that the teachers hate us! They haven’t had their salaries cut (but bus drivers and cafeteria workers are hourly and have had their hours cut way back to just do food deliveries for the free lunch kids).
Me, on the other hand, was working more and got a pay cut to avoid outright layoffs. AND then I had to do the teachers’ work on top of that b/c they only send zoom invites to parents and sending on assignments on things, especially math, that the teacher never taught just led to me becoming a math teacher and also the helpdesk b/c they never made sure that anything worked as intended before sending it out. And then I’d also have to make family lunch and/or dinner, when I had only needed to cook 4-5 times a week to have the meals and leftovers come out right (kids usually bought lunch depending on the menu).
They made my life so, so, so much harder. No one ever offered to help, ever. E-mail to teachers weren’t ever even returned, so IDK what they were doing outside of their 2 weekly zoom calls. And our school was supposed to have been a better school among the ones in our city. What a joke.
Anonymous says
Yikes, what a lack of empathy for the teachers. Many teachers also have children of their own at home to handle on top of their day jobs, and few have the resources to pay for hired help like many of us on this s1te. I can only imagine how may irate parents were emailing them day and night, too.
If you want to be mad at someone, be mad at our government or your employer. There should be widespread accommodation for working parents (FMLA for all) and if we had done even the most modest amount of contact tracing, testing, and effective social distancing, we wouldn’t be asking them to risk their lives so that your kid can have a more enriching fall semester. Yes, there are many vulnerable kids who will continue to suffer if they are home, but I’m guessing that isn’t your kid. Our country has done NOTHING to stop this virus, and now we expect others to continue to bear the brunt of it on our behalf (teachers, hospital workers, grocery store employees, Amazon delivery workers, etc).
Anonymous says
Holy Eff! We have done a lot and this is a strongly spreadable virus. Teachers . . . have not done much. Not compared to Amazon workers. Not compared to grocery workers. And not compared to the parents who dove in constantly to pick up the balls that the teachers dropped.
OTOH, the private school teachers in my city actually offered live zoom classes with real instruction (vs ours which were happy hours, talking about pets and so forth). Hey, if you pay $30K/year/kid, you ought to get at least 2 hours of teaching in a day (which means that those working parents don’t have to do a teachers’ job on top of their other job).
So if I complain, I do complain. Parents who are not proficient in English or who are undocumented or who are actually non-computer-savvy grandparents, won’t or can’t speak up. Someone has to and I am fine being that person. And teachers and admins need to know that in a state with a robust charter school network, a lot of the most active parents (the ones who get sh*t done and raise $ so that poorer kids can go on fieldtrips, etc.) and their kids and their proportionate share of the $ are getting fed up and if they don’t fix it, we won’t have a choice but to leave.
Anonymous says
Man, I wouldn’t respond to your emails either.
Anonymous says
I cannot think of any other situation where one party just does not even try to do their job, makes their job my job, and then expects to not only retain their job but get the pay that comes with doing 100% of the work. If I had a dentist like that (oh, just DIY and you still pay the same property taxes as before) or a colorist (here are the chemicals and rubber gloves and a paint brush and a timer; do your best but I will want a really big tip) or a mechanic (there is oil in the back for that oil change; I hope it’s compatible with your car, but I’m not going to go check it or anything or help you remove the oil filter and then put the thingie back on the bottom of the pan).
It is really amazing to me that teachers got to not do the work for full pay while other people have had to deal with rolling furloughs, salary reductions, and outright layoffs. I get that initially things weren’t great, but they never got better only more disruptive. It’s bad form these days to expect to get fully paid but not deliver week after week. I suspect that many just don’t care and the people at the top don’t care and I’ve even heard that for the few teachers who were trying to teach, they got in trouble for making other teachers look bad in comparison. They are deliberately doing the minimum and not wanting to see anything better get done b/c they know it will just highlight what is possible and that they don’t care.
More Sleep Would Be Nice says
I have less skin in the game here – DS is 2.5 and I’m pregnant with #2, but I think this is spot-on. What is happening right now due to COVID-19 is not a failure of anyone except our country’s. For an “industrialized country” we have scant safety net/mass benefits, which is why we work from such an individualist perspective (and this is only perpetuated by current national leadership), which IMHO has continued to increase the spread and all related economic and social problems of COVID-19.
I mean look at this board – most women here are relatively high-earners or part of a couple that is probably in the quarter of income in this country and we’re ALL struggling with childcare, school, etc. Same conversation for the more vulnerable families has even more dire outcomes – no breakfast/lunch, no subsidized after care, etc. I think Western Europe and Canada will be resilient after this because of things like nationalized health care (which is by no means perfect), leave policies, and a stronger approach to national education/childcare. East Asian countries focused more on the community/societal well being, so they are having better outcomes. Hell, even India where I have extended family, which is rife with their own issues when it comes to the poor/COVID-19, has a nationalized lockdown. This is an abject failure of national leadership and priorities, and it’s trickled down to all of us, regardless of red state/blue state.
Realist says
Spot on, More Sleep Would Be Nice
FVNC says
Yes, “distance learning” in our and our friends’ experience was a complete oxymoron. I’d be happy to let my kid read all day if she’s out of school (she’d learn far more that way than anything the school provided) but the libraries are closed!
Anonymous says
Seriously — do a book swap with other families. Or just start buying. Costs less than private school and I bet classmates would love to have something new and maybe share back after your initial week of purchasing. Bookstores in our city will order for you and you call when it’s in and they put in a paper back for you.
Anonymous says
I think that the reason parents are insisting that schools open is that we know from months of seeing it that remote learning is a complete joke and adds to the stress of working parents (particularly moms). The kids found it frustrating and glitchy. They either need to get each kid a laptop that is compatible with what they are assigning or just don’t even bother. Those days should be treated as school vacation days for parents and furlough for teachers. Let’s just dispense with the charade. If distance learning = learning, people wouldn’t be as up in arms (at least working moms who CAN work from home). But we’ve seen it and it was a joke. Never again.
Anonymous says
Ugh. Yes. And just Ugh. Add to the fact that the alternatives offered (virtual learning) are so ineffective for younger students that a vast amount of parents are throwing up their hands and planning to homeschool.
anon says
Yes. If my school district ends up with the hybrid model of 2-days on, 2-days home learning I might just take a leave of absence from my job (before they fire me.) It was hard enough to find f/t childcare – I can’t possibly find 2-day a week childcare (where kids will be exposed to all kinds of additional germs they wouldn’t have if they’d just stayed at school) and spend the other two days supervising distance learning while trying to work. It’s impossible. I’d rather home-school than pretend the hybrid model is workable for anyone with obligations other than parenting.
Cb says
Oof, so true! I’ve only read Deb’s cooking writing but she’s an amazing writer more generally. I’m in the UK and we’ve been told that childcare will return 2 days a week and many private options are going out of business and waiting lists for centres which have survived have quadrupled. Meanwhile, the university I work for is proposing going to a 6 day teaching week, with no acknowledgement that childcare is nearly impossible to come by during the week, weekend is definitely not possible.
This line:
I resent articles that view the struggle of working parents this year as an emotional concern. We are not burned out because life is hard this year. We are burned out because we are being rolled over by the wheels of an economy that has bafflingly declared working parents inessential.
FVNC says
Also read the article this morning, and agreed to hard with everything. I really thought our schools would figure something out, and the fact that they’re just…not, is so deeply upsetting to me. And like the author, I’m one of the most privileged parents out there! Our governments are failing at every level and I just don’t get it.
Anon says
I love Deb and she’s so right about all of this. I’ve sent this article to everyone who didn’t send it to me first.
Spirograph says
I was just venting so hard to my mom about this last night. It is insane that we have bars and gyms open, but we can’t open schools. It’s a really complicated problem, I get it, but I have a lot of faith in human ingenuity, and I don’t think enough of it or nearly enough resources have been applied to solving schools and school age childcare. The solution cannot be to deputize parents as teachers part time for a full year. It just cannot. It’s a huge disservice to both kids and parents. Maybe that kind of works for middle school and up (I don’t know, my kids aren’t that old), but it sure doesn’t work for elementary school. I’m considering paying $60-70k for private school or a full time nanny/tutor for 3 kids, and I’m incredibly bitter about it, but I’m also livid on behalf of the 99% of people who don’t have that kind of money to throw at this problem.
Anonymous says
It’s crazy to me that the business community has not been more vocal about all this. Just look at the % of your employees who list dependents on their healthcare plans and you’ll have a starting sense of the massive scale of the issue. If you’re a CEO, to me your #1 job right now is screaming on the phone at your governor until they realize the complete idiocy of reopening bars before schools and daycares.
I’m planning to start advocating for more vocal engagement with govt within my company, but we’re tiny. If anyone here works for a large firm, and feels comfortable speaking up, you will be doing parents everywhere a huge service. Business leaders HAVE to step up and communicate what’s at stake to policymakers.
Anonymous says
Business leaders don’t care. Their attitude is that a lack of stable child care is an individual employee’s own failure, not a systemic failure.
SandyDC says
And businesses are run, for the most part, by middle-aged or older men who do not have to contend with these problems. Their children are older, generally speaking, and many of them have/had wives that stayed home or mommy tracked and are able to handle all the childcare/schooling issues.
IHeartBacon says
This. Also, business leaders don’t consider it their problem. Ultimately, if an employee is underperforming because of these personal problems, they’ll just hire employees who don’t have the same personal problems. It’s going to be an employer’s market soon and all the moms (because of course it will be moms aside from a few exceptions) will be squeezed out of the workforce. Employers are not our social safety net.
Doggie says
My parents travel a lot and we dog sit for them regularly. We don’t have a dog, but really like theirs, and the kids frequently ask when she can come over again. She was just here about a week ago, and they were thrilled.
She was elderly, and passed on last night. Any tips for how to share this with the kids (5 and 7)? It wasn’t a shock given her age, but she seemed pretty OK (just slow) last week, so it’s a big blow.
Emily S. says
Ooof, I’m sorry. We recently went through this with our in-laws cat, who the kids see twice a week. We explained that she had died because she was old and sick — we played that up hard, so as not to concern our 5 year old that merely old and kinda sick people would die suddenly on her tomorrow. We talked about Daniel Tiger’s “Remembering Blue Fish,” which I know would be too young for your kids, but it was the only book about an animal dying we had. What I took from that book was to be gentle but honest and direct, so the kids understood that the pet wasn’t coming back and didn’t got their hopes up. We also encouraged our kids to be kind to their grandparents, who were probably sad. If your libraries are open, could you pick up some books about pets dying to help? I know several have been mentioned here, but I can’t find them. If you think your kids will start asking for a dog of their own or when grandparents will get a new dog, I would be prepared to answer those. Also, FWIW, a friend who lost her cat used the “rainbow bridge” approach for her 5 year old.
Anonymous says
I viewed my mother in law’s beloved dog dying as a good thing for my kids. I realize this is crazy. However, my thought was it was an early step into death discussions, and thank goodness we didn’t start with a beloved human. It provided a chance to discuss dying, both pets and people, what happens when something or someone dies, and normalize what is a completely normal topic. There are a few books I considered reading with my kids (4 and 6 if I recall), but ultimately I just told them, they were sad and got hugs, and it became a dinner topic for a while. All went well. I let them lead the discussions and answered anything they asked.
Doggie says
I had that thought, too (that this was a good “practice” case. But it will still be hard to hear.
Katarina says
I think it is best to be direct, and say that the dog died. I also said that I was sad (this was obvious) and that it was okay to be sad. Our dog (not elderly or in poor health) died suddenly. In retrospect he probably did have some symptoms of what was probably a brain tumor, but nothing concerning a the time. Due to the suddenness, we did not really have an opportunity to plan. My 5 year old talked about it some, like how the dog could not walk to school with us anymore, but did not ask too many questions. I think a 7 year old would be more inclined to ask a lot of questions.
Anon says
Our daycare is finally reopening next month. In addition to the standard precautions like masks and temp checks, they are asking kids to social distance in the classroom and teachers are not supposed to hug a child unless the child is crying or in obvious distress. I realize they’re probably not going to be very successful at enforcing social distancing between kids (and I’m not worried about my kid having close contact with a small group of classmates) but I’m just not sure how kids can learn the social skills of preschool if they’re constantly being told to stay 6 feet away from other kids. Like if two kids are playing together with a toy and the teachers will tell them to get further apart – how can they learn sharing? Did anyone else’s daycare try to do this? How is it going?
Also has anyone dropped off kids to a new classroom after all this? Because they were closed for 5 months, kids will be moving to new rooms. And because of Covid we hand kids off at the door not the classroom. My 2 year old is not especially clingy, but I don’t see any way that handing her off to a masked stranger who can’t even smile at her is going to end in anything but disaster.
Argh I was so desperate for daycare to open but now that I know all the procedures I feel like I have so much anxiety about how this is going to go.
Anon says
I’m the above poster whose kids are starting back next week. They’re going to be in a different room because kids are getting shuffled around to meet new ratios and keep siblings together, but I’m not really that worried about it. Yes, their teachers will have masks but they’re still getting dropped off at the same door to the same people. We’ve talked about it and their biggest concern is knowing where their new cubby will be, but they’re pretty excited about the “we’ve gotten bigger so now we’re in a different class!” line.
I don’t think our daycare is seriously trying to enforce social distancing between the kids, though. They’ve rearranged the classrooms so that all the ‘stations’ are distanced, but afaik they’re still going to let kids rotate through stations in pairs. The teachers seem well aware that half the point of care at this point is letting kids socialize with others their age.
AnotherAnon says
My kid’s day care has been open for several weeks now. He’s 3 and honestly he doesn’t “get” social distancing, but they’re all doing their best. I try not to grill the director so I’m honestly not sure how much truth there is to what my 3 y/o is telling me but they’re still playing together outdoors and being “encouraged” to stay 6 feet apart. He’s very disappointed that there’s no hugging…which is a boundaries thing we’re working on anyway. At first he thought he was being punished by having to use the same work space all day, but his teacher kindly explained that everyone has to use the same work space, but he could choose a new one the next day. All teachers wear masks – I don’t think my kid notices. FWIW, ours hasn’t mandated masks for kids…yet. Kids are pretty resilient. I will say mine has been exhausted by the end of the day. Hugs to you. I think it will be fine.
Anon4this says
I’m hoping my daycare will have a spot for us at the end of this month. My daughter was previously in the infant room but now will be in the toddler room (she’ll be 14-15 months depending on when daycare actually opens and if we get a spot). The last time she was at daycare she was 10 months. I doubt she remembers it or the teachers so I’m not worried about the change in room, but I don’t think she’ll react well to being left with a masked stranger at the door to the daycare facility and just leave. We had a 1 year pediatrician appointment where I and everyone was in masks and some in face shields and we practiced every day, for multiple short spurts a day, for a couple weeks before hand to try and get her used to seeing people in masks and it didn’t help at all. We played peekaboo with them, wore them as hats, I wore one in the house, the dog wore one (well kind of). The visit was a complete unmitigated disaster. She freaked out the entire time (visit was about 30 minutes and actually managed to bash her head on the floor hard enough that the pediatrician was concerned). Thoughts or suggestions? I’ve kind or just accepted that this is just reality at the moment but if there is something I can do to help with the transition I’m prepared to try.
Emily S. says
My kids have been in daycare for 3 weeks now with similar set up. It was weird and difficult for everyone the first drop off, but they adjusted beautifully. (I still trudge back to the car because I can’t walk them in, however.) My school has a floating teacher that the kids all knew at the door to do temp checks almost every day — a welcome surprise and a nice consistency, so perhaps your center will have something like that. And they can hear the teachers, so even if they can’t see their mouth, they can hear the happiness/welcoming in their voice (I believe.) The school published a lengthy explanation of cleaning and social distancing steps in the classroom before re-opening and I chose to put stock in it, just like, for my own sanity, I have chosen to turn a blind eye to the probability that social distancing is not happening in the 2.5 year old’s classroom. I just believe hard in the nascent and anecdotal evidence that kids are not driving the spread of disease. (FWIW, my center had a sick teacher, but none of the kids in her class or other teachers in the school got sick.) It is an adjustment, but I hope it goes well for you!
EB says
Our daycare has been back since June 1 and I would say based on the photos we get through the app that the kids are not social distancing for the most part – at least outside. They do use the same work station all day (in the older class) and sit on taped marks on the circle rug to keep them apart, but I also get photos of them holding hands and sliding down the slide together, so distancing is not being enforced outside. My younger child is in the infant room, and as infants do, they’re basically crawling all over each other in some of the pictures. They take the babies outside in this giant playpen type thing quite often, although it’s tough because we’re in Texas in July. I’m fine with all of this. I don’t see how you could get kids to stay distanced realistically, and I think they’re doing their best to make up for that by cleaning meticulously and washing hands ALL the time, etc.
KatieWolf says
My child went back to daycare after 3 months out on June 1- she was 17 months at that time. I was concerned bc she was going to a completely different school, different classroom, classmates, etc. Teachers wore masks for drop off and pick up but not in the classroom. She was actually completely fine with drop off, and I was concerned bc all of our masked visits to the ped had been not great. Now teachers are wearing masks in classrooms as well, and I don’t think it phased her. She has been LOVING her new school so I’m very happy with everything. I would think if you have problems with drop off it wouldn’t last more than a week or so, until she gets used to it.
TheElms says
Anon4this (from above) – thanks this is helpful.
anon. says
For what it’s worth, my 3 YO went back two weeks ago and it’s totally seamless. I realize 2 and 3 is very different, but kids are so adaptable. He’s fine with all the handwashing (peer pressure I guess, he’s terrible about it at home!), sanitizing stations, temp checks, masked teachers, etc. He’s just so happy to be back I don’t think he has even really noticed the difference.
anon says
Has anyone else had a school announce that they’re going to do standards based learning for the fall? The way this was explained to me is that their goal is for all kids to meet the grade level standards and that’s it. No differentiation, only remediation.
The problem for me is that my daughter is above grade level in pretty much all areas. She was supposed to be tested for the gifted program last spring, but didn’t get tested because of COVID. I’ve been told that she will get no additional materials or instruction beyond the grade level standards.
I’ve been told that if there is an outbreak and we are remote, she can join classwide activities but won’t otherwise interact with the teacher. The teacher won’t call her or meet with her in a small group because the teacher must focus on getting the other kids up to grade level. If the school has 2 day a week in person learning, she won’t meet with the teacher 1:1 or in small groups in class and will only get the same materials (too easy) as the rest of the students. The 3 ‘off-days’ are just homework packets with no differentiation. I just can’t imagine that they’re planning to teach her nothing this year. It sounds like she won’t even really get to interact with the teacher. I want her to have the social emotional benefit of seeing peers at school, but should I send her to school to be ignored? Ugh.
Anonymous says
Nope. Move. Go to private school for a year. Take out a second mortgage if you need to pay for it. This is unacceptable.
Anonymous says
+1 This sounds like a very good reason to switch to private school.
Anonymous says
Private school is just not an available option for many people. Private school application deadlines were months ago. None of the good schools will have seats left. And then you have to have $$$$$ just lying around, and if you can afford it you have to convince your cheapskate husband that you can indeed afford it and it’s worthwhile.
Anonymous says
I don’t think that that is possible in my city now. They had wait lists before (like one school had an alumni parent and it still took 4 years for them to get their kids in; one other friend was only able to get one kid in b/c a slot opened up due to a job transfer; other kid is still in a giant public school and will probably remain there) and I bet they have only grown longer.
anon says
Do private schools even want a kid who is socially immature and needs some supports in that area, but who is academically advanced and needs coursework differentiated? I love my kid, but she’s a lot of work.
Anonymous says
You need the right school. Our city has three fancy private schools. Two only want “perfect” kids who will follow the standard program and won’t give them any trouble. The third is colloquially known as the “ADHD” school and advertises that it accommodates individual needs.
Anonymous says
Yes they want anyone who can pay, often.
anon says
I believe the private schools in our area are all very competitive and require interviews, testing, and have long wait lists. They all also have a significant commute for us. There are some religious schools that may be easier to get into, but these don’t align with our values (i.e., Catholic or uber religious).
Anonymous says
Ok. Look I’m offering options. If you just want to complain go for it
anon says
Not complaining. Just tired of hitting dead ends. I spent a solid hour looking for private schools within driving distance based on your comment. We’d need to move, which is a lot.
Anonymous says
1. You can get your kid privately tested and I’d recommend it just so you have some good data on her. Your school may have tests that they use to place in “gifted” classes. Usually it something with “Wisconsin” as one of the abbreviated words.
2. You can do what we did and basically buy $100 of books every week (2 kids, different ages) b/c each book we had prior to then that probably been read 10x after a couple of weeks. Or have a book swap with friends.
I lost most of one academic year as a kid when our country had a revolution. I just read until we were allowed to leave (and was irritated to get enrolled in a new school — I thought I was done for the year). It was so bad I read a whole set of encyclopedias and every box of cereal if there were words written on it.
anon says
1. Is there a point to getting her tested as opposed to just supplementing to keep her learning? If it give me leverage with the school I can certainly find a testing option, but I’m not sure it’s going to get me much right now. Even post-pandemic her school only offers push in services, so no “gifted” classes per se.
2. She’s been reading excessively all spring, as the school opted not to teach at all. She’s 6 and reads about 200 pages a day. I was buying about 6 chapter books per week until the library reopened a week ago. She just finished the whole set of Roald Dahls. We also have a few math workbooks from Amazon so she can do something, but I’d want more of a math curriculum if I’m really going to homeschool (while working FT with a husband who is at work as an essential employee).
Anonymous says
I’d get her tested b/c she could probably access things like Duke TIP online that will help if you are remote any this fall. And she should be on the radar as eligible for some things that you never know about if you don’t raise your hand (e.g., our city has a math competition for third graders every year that only the top kids get invited to; no one else even knows it exists, so you never see the doors shutting around you and then it’s too late). I had my kids tested before K started b/c learning disabilities run in our family and my mom used to teach at a school dealing with them and I just wanted to know if they needed anything other than the vanilla stuff they’d get at school. I’m so glad that I did b/c one kid is on the spectrum (a quiet non-disruptive girl, so she never got caught in the very basic ASD-3-related screenings and I knew that she was bright but would also need support in some areas nevertheless).
Anonymous says
I like CTY at Johns Hopkins better than TIP. TIP just seems like a revenue generator. CTY has some courses like that this summer, but their core offerings are pretty substantive.
Anonymous says
I think it matters where in the country you live. I lived in the Mid-Atlantic and we were assigned to Hopkins. I live in the SEUS now and we default to TIP. I think older kids can do summer residential programs anywhere, but I’m not sure they are what my kids need now (outdoor camps this summer, when they are happening, and some DuoLingo and Mommy’s Math Problem Du Jour, and still more books).
Anonymous says
I don’t think anyone gets “assigned” to CTY or TIP. They are national programs, but different school districts may push one or the other or neither. You can participate in the CTY talent search independently.
layered bob says
Could you tell me more about the testing you did? My daughter’s pediatrician suggested we “look into testing” because she is hyperlexic and also has some sensory hangups, but the ped couldn’t really provide more guidance than that, and I’m at a loss as to what kind of testing would give us more information about how to support her as she starts K next year.
Anonymous says
Not the person you’re replying to, but I had my child tested at age 4. I called a psychologist who specialized in educational testing, who recommended just the WPPSI. In hindsight, I wish we’d waited until she was old enough for the WISC, because she ceilinged out on multiple subsections of the WPPSI. I also wish we’d requested additional testing for the inattentive type of ADHD and for learning styles.
WISC scores are more useful than WPPSI scores, which tend to be ignored or not accepted for admission to programs after a year or two. The only useful advice we got from the examiner (who worked with all the local private schools and knew their admissions processes) was that there was no way any of the private schools would let us advance her a grade, so we should go with public school.
Our school district, like most I’ve encountered, will only identify kids as gifted on the basis of its own testing. Having those WPPSI scores in our back pocket probably helped us convince the school district to test her before she started first grade (this district prefers to test around the end of grade 2), but the scores didn’t factor into the identification decision.
FWIW, sensory issues are common in exceptionally gifted kids.
TheElms says
Could she skip a grade instead? So if she is going into first grade, could she go into second grade instead? She’d have to make new friends – but I assume the classes would shuffle ordinarily even if she went to her normal grade (or has that been stopped).
anon says
She’s very young for her current grade (she starts 2nd grade as a 6 yo) and struggles with maturity, so skipping a grade would be a bad idea socially. It would be good if she could get the distance learning materials from the next grade. I can ask about that, though they turned me down this past spring.
Anonymous says
I am the mom below who had her kid skip a grade. Mine started third grade at age 7 and turned 8 that winter. Thanks to rampant redshirting, many of her classmates were more than 18 months older. That was fine, but a bigger age gap could have been problematic. I agree that 6 is probably too young for third grade.
anon says
Yeah, because of our cutoff she was already the youngest in her class this year, and 14 months younger than the oldest two students (redshirted July birthdays). There may be students who can handle adding another 12 months to that gap, but she already struggles socially.
Anonymous says
This is what our school district is like all the time. No differentiation until high school, entire focus is on ensuring a 100% pass rate on state tests. Gifted services are a joke. No more than 5 gifted kids are allowed in the same elementary school class. The gifted resource teacher does one lesson per week for the entire class, with no pull-outs for the identified kids. We had to advance our child a grade by skipping K, and she is still bored to death. I would look at an accredited on-line program that will allow you to advance her a grade, either by skipping a grade this summer or by doing two grades during the year. That way when she goes back in 2021/2022, the school will have to accept her at a higher grade level.
anon says
She’s so young for her current grade that moving up a grade would make her two years younger than most students. You really don’t want a 6 yo in 3rd grade–she’s just not mature enough to handle that.
Anonymous says
It’s probably worse than that. My daughter turned 5 over the summer and there were some seriously red-shirted kids in her class who were already 7 (the mom was awful — “I went to harvard and my kid is reading 2 grade levels ahead” right, lady, your kid is also about 2 years older than my kid, so that makes him average).
Anonymous says
Ugh, yes. There was a kid in my daughter’s class who was nearly two years older and thought he was a super genius. No, you’re not a genius. You are just in the wrong grade.
Anonymous says
Try adding in remote language learning either apps or online tutors. Tons of sites have online language learning.
My 8 year old kid is learning to read and write in English, French and German. She’s much happier and more balanced at that age compared to how I struggled with racing ahead of my peers academically but being socially younger plus I was closer to grade level in maths/sciences. For me things evened out in high school when I could take some advanced classes and university courses but I would have had a better elementary school experience if I had been more challenged at a younger age.
Anon says
This is a great idea. English is my second language and I added French and Chinese later in middle and high school, all of which kept me more engaged. Coursera and EdX has many free options from universities, and Italki is a great platform if you’re looking for native tongue tutors who will teach via Skype. I had a fantastic French tutor who got me to DALF C1 level (which fulfills the requirement for entry to masters programs in French universities) and who also works with kids a lot.
Anon says
If you can swing it, can you look into EPGY Stanford or other online school options for gifted students? I think they now do 7 – 12 at EPGY and you can just take a few courses as opposed to doing everything there.
At a baseline, I’m like a broken record, but Khan Academy and Singapore Math / Princeton Review (Junior Smart series) books are your friend. I basically had a crappy situation with a nationalized curriculum (no gifted program) in a different country, with public school teachers that refused to teach properly (admittedly the student: teacher ratio was 55-60:1 in any given elementary school class so maybe not entirely their fault). I had started independent reading at age 3. My mom made me work through 0.5-1 hour of math workbooks on my own, every day, since 1st grade. By grade 3 I was doing workbooks at two – three grade levels above my actual grade, enjoued the challenge, and kept it up / accelerated until middle school.
I was allowed to enroll in a separate private accelerated class after school when I started Geometry in 7th grade (according to my mom’s information, Geometry is when it supposedly becomes difficult to figure things out on your own) and also dabbled in physics in 9th grade. But I suspect Khan Academy would have done just as well if it had been available then.
Anom says
If you can swing it, can you look into EPGY Stanford or other online school options for gifted students? I think they now do 7 – 12 at EPGY and you can just take a few courses as opposed to doing everything there.
At a baseline, I keep saying this but Khan Academy and Singapore Math / Princeton Review (Junior Smart series) books are your friend. I basically had a situation with a nationalized curriculum (no gifted program) in a different country, with teachers that refused to teach properly (admittedly the student: teacher ratio was 50-60:1 in any given elementary school class). I had started independent reading at age 3. My mom made me work through 0.5-1 hour of math workbooks on my own, every day. By grade 2 I was doing workbooks at two – three grade levels above my actual grade and kept it up / accelerated until middle school.
I was allowed to enroll in a separate private accelerated class after school when I started Geometry in 7th grade (according to my mom’s information, Geometry is when it supposedly becomes difficult to figure things out on your own) but I suspect Khan Academy would have done just as well if it had been available then. This, plus a lot of reading, basically kept me entertained and engaged and out of trouble despite the utter boredom that was school.
Anom says
Sorry for the double comment!
Anonymous says
Stanford’s application deadline was in March.
Anonymous says
I was advanced in elementary school but mainstreamed. It gave me the opportunity to do a lot of skill building, like learning what I was interested in and how to pursue that and helping tutor and support others. If your kiddo needs advanced learning and social skill-building, working to provide support to other students (remotely) might be an option to gain skills and learn about supporting others with your gifts. And like someone else said, lots of books and the ability to pursue interests. I read a ton as a kid (including in class when I was done with all my work). It was great for me.
AnonATL says
I’m looking for some sentimental “mom” jewelry (think kid’s birthstone, name,etc) on Etsy, but there are so many! Has anyone purchased something there that they loved? I’m fairly minimalist with my jewelry. A lot of the options look kinda cheap. Bonus points if you can add stones or initials to the necklace as you add kids. And preference for necklace or rings over bracelet or earrings.
Katarina says
Not etsy, but I used a local jewelry store for birthstone jewelry. I waited until I was confident that I was done having kids. I have a three stone ring, with a birthstone for each child in gold, and my mom has a matching three birthstone necklace. We were able to look at samples and pick out the particular stones to be used. I realize nowadays you might not want to be making a lot of trips to a jewelry store.
My MIL also got me a necklace with the children’s names, although I am not sure where she got it. It has three concentric rings, one with each child’s name.
Anonymous says
Same, DH got me a birthstone ring from a local jeweler as a mother’s day present at my request. I sent him some pictures of things I liked, and he took them to the jeweler and leaned on their expertise.
Anon says
Kohls has the “birthstone babies” charm for necklaces. My mom had those of us when we were little back in the early 90s, so I was really touched when she got one for me of my daughter. My love of it is probably tied more to the sentimental aspect rather than it being an objectively pretty piece of jewelry, but it works for me (caveat that my daughter tried to rip it off my neck at 9 months and it was removed to a safe place, and since she still uses me as a climbing gym at nearly 3, I have not yet returned to wearing necklaces, or frankly any jewelry other than diamond studs, my wedding set, and my waterproof apple watch).
Anonymous says
I bought a necklace and ring with my daughter’s birthstone on Etsy. I bought this necklace from Abiza Jewelry: https://www.etsy.com/listing/224063436/raw-emerald-necklace-emerald-birthstone?ref=shop_home_active_41&pro=1&frs=1
and this ring from Ring Crush: https://www.etsy.com/listing/515507962/triple-raw-emerald-ring-raw-stone-ring?ref=yr_purchases.
Generally I prefer the necklace because I like that the beads on the necklace are shaped whereas the stones on the ring are not uniformly shaped, but that’s just a preference.
AnonATL says
Oooh loves those- Thank you! I might invest in a custom ring once we are done having kids, but I want something special before then, and this fits the bill!
BlueAlma says
When I had two kids, I purchased a beautiful necklace with interlocking circles (one smaller than the other) from PaperBirdStudio. That necklace broke (my fault) a few hours before my third child arrived. The seller fixed it, and then I purchased another necklace—three nestled rainbow arcs for my three boys. I like that both pieces are deeply meaningful but aren’t obviously mom jewelry. That suits my style.
Playroom Adult Seating says
Posted this on the wrong page… oops!
I’m in need of adult seating (or not just small kid seating) in our playroom. We got a Nugget that just arrived, which was intended to go in there. However we love it so much that we’ve decided to put it in the larger, more adult-centric family room (mind you, there’s a play kitchen and lots of toys in there so it’s not 100% non-kid).
Now that the nugget got hijacked, what’s a good tweener? I was looking at storage chests but many don’t look purpose-built seating. Any recommendations or better ideas than a storage bench, or can you recommend one that you find is sturdy enough for adult seating? Looking for enough seating for 1-2 adults max.
TheElms says
What about a blocksy or a beanbag chair or an upholstered storage ottoman (or 2)?
TheElms says
Thinking more on this I think dorm furniture would be perfect for this. Here are some ideas from Target (No storage though in these options.)
https://www.target.com/p/butterfly-chair-room-essentials-153/-/A-53143076?preselect=53099286#lnk=sametab
https://www.target.com/p/rocking-dish-chair-gray-room-essentials-8482/-/A-78679706
https://www.target.com/p/structured-bean-bag-chair-room-essentials/-/A-79315412?preselect=78679700#lnk=sametab
Anon says
We use padded storage ottomans as extra seating in our family room for adults. Obviously not comfortable for long periods of time because they are backless, but they serve as a quasi coffee table (but padded with rounded edges) are flexible enough to move around, and prior to DD constantly emptying them out to turn them into ships for her, decent extra storage. Mine was from Target almost a decade ago, but I was looking to replace (one bit the dust a month ago when DD tried to use it as a landing pad) and I think they still carry something similar.
OP says
Do you have any specific recs or a link to something similar? This is not meant for duration seating, more so just floating in and out of the playroom. The nugget is not 12 inches off the ground that that would be sufficient – heck I’d buy a second – but tehy’re back ordered forever and I don’t want to wait. Storage in this seating options would be amazing.
Anon says
This guy looks almost identical to what we have (except I got mine on sale about 10 years ago for something like $50 a piece long before “Threshold” was a thing and they were a cheery yellow gingham pattern – likely outing me to anyone who knows me): https://www.target.com/p/tufted-round-storage-ottoman-threshold-153/-/A-15222988?preselect=15093019#lnk=sametab
Anon says
Oh, and you can top with a round tray to make them more coffee-table like that you can just pull off when folks need to sit.
OP says
Round! That’s a great idea. Takes up less space, too. Thanks!
anon says
Crate and Barrel has those cube ottomans that would maybe work for this. Bonus that they have storage space and you can flip over the top for a table surface.
Anon says
We have PB teen lounge furniture in my kid’s room.
Realist says
Yogibo is great if you can get into the idea of a giant beanbag.
AnotherAnon says
I’m borrowing trouble but, can we talk more about red shirting kindergarten? My kid is already small for his age (0.2 percentile small). If he has to go to first grade with kids who are two years older than him, I can almost guarantee he’ll be bullied. I don’t want to red shirt him, but I also don’t want him to be the smallest kid in his class. Guess I have no control over that huh.
Anonymous says
Please don’t hold your son back because of antiquated notions about masculinity. If your kid is going to be bullied, the bullies will find a reason whether or not he’s the smallest in the class.
Anonymous says
This
Anonymous says
Is he small and young? Or just small? How is he socially, academically, etc.?
My son was young and immature (academically and physically tracking though) so we had him take kindergarten twice (his birthday is 2 weeks before the cut-off). As a result, he’s one of the bigger kids in his grade and one of the oldest. Could you start him on time and see if he needs the extra year?
Anonymous says
I had the 5YO that I sent to K on time (only to find 7YO kids also in it). My kids are both >99% for height. The younger one is still the baby in her class and yet in class pictures is at the middle of the back row. If I had red-shirted her, it would be even worse. My other kid has a fall birthday, still isn’t the oldest, but is usually the tallest. She is the one who was bullied — being very tall or very short or the only redhead or the only person of your race or having acne or having early puberty can all get you bullied. Any notable non-voluntary thing is enough. It’s not right. The only qualm I would have is whether it ever comes out that you redshirted him b/c he was short. We are all protective of our kids, but there was a WSJ article about this somewhere in the past couple of years that kids pick up that you don’t have confidence in them and they notice themselves in relation to classmates. If anything, can you send your kid so another school/daycare that has a TK year? It might give you an informal way of testing the waters if you do decide to redshirt (it would seem less odd to switch schools and go from TK->K than to not go anywhere while your same-aged friends get on the real school bus in the morning). Also, TK won’t be as intellectually enriching as K will be (generally speaking) and is more for kids who need more social/emotional growth before K. I don’t think that there is a right answer so much as there are wrong ways to go about executing your plan.
Anonymous says
Both my kids were born around Sept. 1. The one right before Sept. 1 will be red-shirted. The one right after will go on time. They’re both boys. One big thing for me is that they’re almost exactly two years apart, but the cutoff would put them 3 grade levels apart, which is a huge hassle for getting them to school. They are in school together a lot more at only 2 grade levels apart.
That is to say that I am fine with redshirting and think you should do what’s right for your circumstances. My mom sent my sister against her better instinct and my sister was held back in K. That has caused her lifelong shame (which is ridiculous – it isn’t her fault. People’s brains develop differently). That same sister has two kids was Aug. birthdays and both started on time.
Clementine says
Where I live, the cutoff is very late (like December late). My kid’s birthday is just a few weeks from the cutoff and we are having him do an extra year of Pre-K with the teacher’s agreement.
For us, it’s not academic – he’s bright and his abilities check all the ‘boxes’ of what you want a rising kindergartener to be able to do; however, for us it was 100% social/emotional. He is younger and struggles with things like impulse control, patience, and attention span. Statistically, kids who are the ‘babies’ of the class are more likely to be diagnosed with ADHD when it’s often just immaturity.
I wouldn’t hold him back if it was just a physical size issue, but the social and emotional skills for me were HUGE. He’s a bright, friendly, happy kid. I don’t want him to think he’s a ‘bad’ kid or get this idea that he ‘can’t’ behave. I want him to be set up for success and for him, that means another year of Pre-K.
Anonymous says
I doubt that a lot of the bullying of short kids is actually motivated by their height. I think bullies tend to choose their target based on personality or behavior, which could include immaturity, and then pick height as the thing they’re going to make fun of.
Anonymous says
I agree with everyone else: kids are equal opportunity bully-ers. Your kid might be bullied irrespective of whether he is the biggest or smallest or somewhere in between.
K readiness is all social-emotional. My younger son’s birthday is a week before the cutoff. He’s done well in a structured preschool setting, is appropriately physically independent, has gross and fine motor skills on track for K, and is super easygoing, social, and not afraid of new people or new situations. He’ll be the youngest kid in his K class UNLESS we’re still in pandemic craziness by Fall 2021, since full time preschool is apparently much easier to find than full time public school.
Anonymous says
Height is absolutely NOT a reason to redshirt a kid! If he is short now, he may very well be a short person all his life and it’s not a reason to hold him back academically. (Signed, someone who is 5’0″ tall.)
Pukey Toddler says
Another joyride for DH and DD (almost 3) today (at DD’s express request “go vroom vroom daddy”) to get gas, the car washed, see the outside world etc., properly dosed with dramamine, yet another day of evaluating whether an hour of peace and quiet in which to do work is worth the 20 minutes of vomit clean-up and extra bath. On the plus side, I am an expert at cleaning out car seats, so it only takes half as long as it used to….
Anonymous says
Oh, that’s terrible. The good news is that by the time things return to normal and she’s in the car every day again, she’ll probably be old enough to face forward.
Anon says
Oh she’s already facing forward….this is the “better” result.
Paging Anon re Sunscreen says
I just saw your question re Bare Republic spray. It’s definitely more liquidy than Coppertone sport. I personally rub it in after, but kiddo just runs off with a white sheen and doesn’t seem to care. He looks purple later, so fair warning there.
Anon says
Thanks!
Fertility Treatments says
Not sure anyone will see this, but this is a safe place to post: my latest round of fertility treatments failed. I feel gutted. I actually looked at my toddler this morning and cried just out of longing for a second. I’m so grateful for her but find her so triggering in so many (very deeply guilty) ways.
We were delayed for months due to insurance in the fall, then again because the doctor realized at the 11th hour I needed a measles booster in the winter, delaying me to March 1. The March 1 cycle was cancelled at the 11th hour on March 23rd due to COVID. Now this. I really just want to sleep all weekend. Hugs to anyone else fighting this silent fight along side me.
Marshmallow says
Lots of hugs back at you. I’m so sorry.
Coach Laura says
Sending big hugs.