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This shirtdress from Banana Republic is the late summer closet pick-me-up I need.
This midi-length dress has a swingy, A-line fit and long balloon sleeves. Just add the included belt (or your own) if you like a little more definition at your waist. I’ve always believed that animal prints count as neutrals, so this zebra-print shirtdress will fit seamlessly into any wardrobe.
I’d pair it with a pair of red pumps or a bright bag for a pop of color.
This dress is $159 and comes in Regular (XXS–XXL), Tall (S–XL), and Petite (“latte cream” only, XXS–L).
Looking for other washable workwear? See all of our recent recommendations for washable clothes for work, or check out our roundup of the best brands for washable workwear.
Sales of note for 4.18.24
(See all of the latest workwear sales at Corporette!)
- Ann Taylor – 50% off full-price dresses, jackets & shoes; $30 off pants & skirts; extra 50% off sale styles
- Banana Republic Factory – Up to 50% off everything; extra 20% off purchase
- Eloquii – 50% off select styles; 60% off swim; up to 40% off everything else
- J.Crew – Mid-Season Sale: Extra 60% off sale styles; up to 50% off spring-to-summer styles
- Lands’ End – 30% off full-price styles
- Loft – Spring Mid-Season Sale: Up to 50% off 100s of styles
- Nordstrom: Free 2-day shipping for a limited time (eligible items)
- Talbots – Spring Sale: 40% off + extra 15% off all markdowns; 30% off new T by Talbots
- Zappos – 29,000+ women’s sale items! (check out these reader-favorite workwear brands on sale, and some of our favorite kids’ shoe brands on sale)
Kid/Family Sales
- Carter’s – Up to 70% off baby items; 50% off toddler & kid deals & 40% off everything else
- Hanna Andersson – Up to 50% off spring faves; 25% off new arrivals; up to 30% off spring
- J.Crew Crewcuts – Up to 60% off sale styles; up to 50% off kids’ spring-to-summer styles
- Old Navy – 30% off your purchase; up to 75% off clearance
- Target – Car Seat Trade-In Event (ends 4/27); BOGO 25% off select skincare products; up to 40% off indoor furniture; up to 20% off laptops & printers
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And — here are some of our latest threadjacks of interest – working mom questions asked by the commenters!
- If you’re a working parent of an infant with low sleep needs, how do you function at work when you’re in the throes of baby’s sleep regression?
- Should I cut my childcare down to 12 hours a month if I work from home?
- Will my baby have speech delays if we raise her bilingual?
- Has anyone given birth in a teaching hospital?
- My child eats everything, and my friends’ kids do not – how should I handle? In general, what is the best way to handle when your child has some skill/ability and your friend’s child doesn’t have that skill/ability?
- ADHD moms, give me your tips to help with things like behavior in the classroom, attention to detail, etc?
- I think I suffer from mom rage…
- My husband and kids are gone this weekend – how should I enjoy my free time?
- I’m struggling to be compassionate with a SAHM friend who complains she doesn’t have enough hours of childcare.
- If you exclusively formula fed, what tips do you have for in the hospital and coming home?
- Could I take my 4-yo and 8-yo on a 7-8 day trip to Paris, Lyon, and Madrid?
AwayEmily says
Is it unrealistic for me to wait until 20 weeks to tell my 5yo and 3yo I’m pregnant? Will I be showing too much by then, and either they will notice or someone will say something to them? I like the idea of waiting because then (1) they’ll be well-established in their new school routines then by (preschool/kindergarten) and (2) I can show them the sono photo so it looks more real. I apparently have no memory of how much I was showing at 20 weeks in my last pregnancies.
HSAL says
I have a 5 and 3s and I don’t think they’d notice anything physically. If I were throwing up all the time or otherwise unable to take part in normal activities I might tell them, but not just because my stomach was a little bigger.
Anon says
i think it varies by person, and people tend to show more with their later kids. i also wonder if your kids are overhearing and perceiving more than you think – again this would be kid dependent.
Anonymous says
I don’t think you can hide it from anyone that long. You will be obviously exhausted if nothing else, and it will show in your face and legs by 8 – 12 weeks. They will know something is up even if they don’t know exactly what.
anon says
I definitely would have been showing (a lot) but I’ve always been able to limit comments around the kids from strangers so I think you could get away with it. We waited to tell the kids until we knew sex of the baby and I do think that was helpful!
In terms of photo, they loved blobby early ultrasounds and they even like the weird 3D ultrasound pics I get now. I think any ultrasound will do! (For reference, pregnant with a 6, 5, and 2 year old right now)
Earlier poster says
Oh but warning – when we told them one of my kids did burst into tears and was pretty inconsolable. So you may get a mixed reaction!
Boston Legal Eagle says
I would for sure be showing earlier and I expect my 5 year old would ask questions and remark on my belly, but I don’t think he would necessarily know that a baby is the end result. 3 year old probably won’t know. I hear you on the upcoming routine changes – I think it’s going to be difficult emotionally either way so not sure there is a way to avoid that.
Spirograph says
My almost 5 year old remarks on my belly now, and I’m not even pregnant. :(
I wouldn’t put it off this long. To me, trying to get the timing exactly right (on literally anything) is a fool’s errand. I don’t think the pregnancy announcement is what’s trigger feelings of Big News and Big Change for the kids, especially the 3 year old, so much as when tangible baby things start to appear. Crib going back up, etc etc. I would figure that I might as well get them started on the idea sooner rather than later, if for no other reason than to alleviate the mental energy of remembering to keep it quiet.
AwayEmily says
Sigh, you are wise and probably right. Honestly I’ve probably been looking for excuses to delay telling them — there is so much going on right now between the start of school, Delta, my husband starting work travel again, me starting to teach in-person again — it just feels like one more thing that I’m going to mess up. But maybe it’s best to just get it over with.
AwayEmily says
Thanks for the responses so far. I’m now 14 weeks and am showing to me, but I don’t think to anyone else (I just told my mom, who we see several times a week, including in a bathing suit, and she was FLABBERGASTED). I was definitely super tired the first tri and went to bed at 8:30 but since the kids went to bed even earlier they didn’t notice.
I’ll take it week by week and see how things go. If we make it to 20, awesome, but if not then I’ll break out the 10-week sonogram and show them their tiny speck of a sister (thanks for the tip, anon at 9:54!). And yeah, I am not anticipating universal excitement…judging from their past comments about little siblings, I think the 5yo will be happy and the 3yo will be decidedly opposed.
TheElms says
I’m moderately jealous you are only just showing because I’m 10 weeks with number 2 and feel like I just popped and am now definitely showing and its soooo early. I thought I had a few more weeks at least. Oh well, nothing to be done about it! Good luck telling the kiddos — let us know how it goes!
AwayEmily says
I think my COVID weight gain is helping to mask it a bit longer.
Hopefully telling the kids will go better than telling my mom, who responded “Wait, you did this on purpose? But everything was going so well!”
(she came around eventually, but it was not QUITE the response I was looking for)
Mary Moo Cow says
I had a similar response from my mother in law: “And was this a planned pregnancy?” I think the facial expressions of everyone in the room told her that was a comment she could have kept to herself. Commiseration!
Curious says
Oh, mothers. Hahaha. Haven’t been in those exact shoes, but I am laughing in recognition.
TheElms says
Ugh I’m sorry that happened. My parents were thrilled, my MIL was skeptical at best. But in her defense, I think she found going from 1 to 2 kids really, really hard (harder than most people do) and doesn’t want to see us hit the same issues she did.
Anonymous says
You guys, I just cannot do this working mom thing any longer. I am tired of being distracted from work by the fact that all household, child-rearing, and COVID stress is mine alone to bear. I just found out that our school district is making masks optional in defiance of state law, and my husband’s response was “welp, there’s nothing we can do about it, guess we are all getting COVID.” So here I am stewing about it instead of focusing on the one million things I need to get done at work and trying to think of a legal theory for a case against the school district in which I am the plaintiff, how to fund said lawsuit because I am not qualified to represent myself, or how to convince my husband to sell our house and leave this state of uneducated backwards a$$holes for good. I cannot do it anymore. Just let me quit my job and home-school.
Anon says
your post is almost funny to me because where I live (TX), school districts are trying to require masks in defiance of state law. there is a petition circulating that I think has been fairly successful so you could consider starting something like that. or call your governor’s office and your superintendents office. i just dont understand why all of these schools think they seem to know more about how to keep kids safe from covid than the CDC/American Association of Pediatrics. The CDC doesn’t tell them how to teach math or reading. Suddenly everyone is an ‘expert’ in public health matters due to their ‘feelings’ on things like masks and vaccines.
IHeartBacon says
I love everything you wrote in this response.
OP, is there someone you can punch, or beat with a baseball bat, or push in front of a moving garbage truck? That might make you feel a little better. Just kidding. (Sort of.)
OP says
Re. punching, my husband has offered more than once over the past 15 months to buy me a FightCamp heavy bag setup. I may need to sacrifice the floor space and take him up on it.
Anonymous says
Solidarity. Not covid stuff but regular back to school shopping plus we have a bunch of medical stuff going on with one of the kids and DH is tuned out. He’s great at dishes and making breakfast/lunch/dinner which is a lot but I feel like I carry all the thinking, organization, planning and then my brain is too tired for work.
ElisaR says
thinking. i hate doing all the thinking. my head is going to explode.
CCLA says
Yes, so much yes
Anonymous says
This is very stressful, and I’m so sorry you’ve reached this point. I’m in a state where the public schools are not allowed to require masks. It is so frustrating. One thing that has helped me feel better is when someone commented on here earlier this week that most countries in Europe are not requiring kids to mask at school. That combined with DH and me being able to WFH as needed when numbers get high has helped me feel better. I am still concerned about what exposures will mean for our family as far as kiddo needing to stay out of school, but I’m less concerned about her from a health perspective. I also remind myself that in our specific, fortunate situation, (1) kiddo is very unlikely to have anything more than mild symptoms if she does catch Covid, and (2) she’s likely already been exposed (I likely had it in April 2020 but was unable to get tested) and made it through that without symptoms. She also has a strong immune system from being in daycare and pre-K most of her life. So I take a few deep breaths and remind myself of all of these logical things when I start to spiral.
anon says
I chuckled as soon as I read the part about legal theory because that is exactly what I would do. I have no answers and my kid is not yet school age (well, we call daycare “school) but ugh it is so hard being the person in charge.
ElisaR says
your post is not funny. it brought me to tears. yes. i feel you.
ElisaR says
sorry i realize other commenters didn’t actually mean “funny” but i just related to your post so much.
Anon says
yes i was the first response and when I said “almost funny” I really meant not funny at all. I almost feel worse than I did at the beginning of the pandemic. I know this is not productive, but I am angry that all of these unvaccinated adults and covid deniers have so much control over our society
IHeartBacon says
This. So much this.
Pogo says
Can you shift ANYTHING to your partner, mental load wise? I feel like I’m barely treading water, but one of the big things that help is constant texting during the day to keep DH up to date on what I’ve done, what’s stressing me out. Recent topics of convo included: I placed the whole foods order, it’s coming at 7; I signed up older son for the Moderna trial because I had a sobfest listening to NPR this morning about the delta variant while I was feeding the baby; do you have any money left in your FSA; I read this thing on insta that actually the incessant rhyming is a good sign older son is learning phonemics.
Even if he doesn’t super help with all this stuff, him knowing the mental load I carry and all the work I do is important in making me feel seen. Plus then he can support where needed. He wouldn’t have known I cried while nursing the baby and listening to NPR if I hadn’t told him, so how could he help?
Hugs. this season is so tough. You need to be supported.
EDAnon says
I tried to sign my kids up for a trial but none of them are near me. I was so disappointed. I also tried to sign myself up for one of the booster trials (I got J&J) and couldn’t do that either. I am just looking for some agency here!
Pogo says
They just opened two sites near us. That’s exactly it – I needed to feel like I could DO something.
Anonymous says
Solidarity. We’re in a region with high vaxx rates and I’m overwhelmed, so I can only imagine how stressful your situation must be. There is a group of parents in FL suing over the governor’s school masking prohibitions, and I am rooting for them!
Sort of random, and I am not a lawyer, but shouldn’t insurance companies be suing governors who institute mask bans as well? Are they just too nervous about the blowback? Or are they assuming the feds will foot the bill somehow? If I were a major shareholder in an insurance company in a state like Alabama, I would be pushing them to sue ASAP.
anon says
What makes me really sad about this pandemic is just how many moms have been practically forced to either lean way out or quit entirely, because of the way we as a a society have handled it and partners who are not putting in their equal share. It makes me so sad for them and their children.
I am sick of watching friends take reductions in their job responsibilities that put them in dead-end careers or quit. And I fear it is gonna be me after one more year of this.
Anon says
does anyone else’s 3 year old throw A LOT of tantrums and scream/cry instead of talking. in the past few weeks, it has gotten terrible. i feel like my sweet child who definitely has always thrown her share of tantrums has been possessed by the devil.
Anoon says
Sometimes this board sounds like ppl have never been around a child until they had their own. Is this really a real question? Yes, 3-year old tantrums are totally normal.
Anonymous says
I don’t think most people these days actually have spent much time around a child until they have their own. Also, we all know that children save their worst behavior for their own parents.
So Anon says
I babysat as a kid/teenager, worked in summer camps in college, and my ex was in elementary education. None of that prepared me for actually having kids. Also, being around kids is entirely different from feeling like you are responsible for identifying “normal” behavior versus behavior that requires more hands on intervention.
Yes, three year olds are hard. I remember hearing that three is like two, but with better timing.
OP says
yes i spent time around kids before having one. but many times kids behave differently in front of others
IHeartBacon says
I love of people have never been around a child until they had their own. Myself included.
anon says
Sounds par for the course with a 3-year-old?
Anon says
+1 three is tough
anonn says
yes, and it’s rolled into 4. Especially at bed time. Now she also uses baby talk and weird high or low pitched voices in her tantrums. Less thrashing, more deliberate acts of defiance ( slamming doors, throwing toys, spitting. )
FVNC says
My 4.5 year old just recently ratcheted up his tantrums too. They went from what I’d describe as “regular” tantrums to episodes where he’s really, really angry and defiant and destructive. He’s my younger kid and my older one never had this level of anger, but after speaking to friends (especially mothers of boys) I’ve been assured that this is not atypical.
Boston Legal Eagle says
“Survive until 5” has proved true for me.
Pogo says
Mine pretends to be a baby animal and when he’s involving that in his tantrum, I have to guess which animal or I get no response. Like if I say, oh baby triceratops, you seem sad, he will make weird high pitched yelping noises and then I’m like ohhh sorry baby puppydog. It is some next level preschooler stuff.
He also does the deliberate defiance, like ‘accidentally’ pouring water out of the tub if I ask him to get out and hurry up the bedtime routine.
shortperson says
this sounds adorable.
Anonymous says
Yes. My youngest is 3 and 95% of the time she is the most mild mannered, easygoing kid I’ve ever met. But on man can she tantrum. Like I’ve never experienced with my other kids. She’s sort of always been like that- I remember having to carry her out of Target thrashing around on the ground at like, 15 months. A few weeks ago, she was overtired and something set her off. It turned into a 45 minute rage where she threw a toy piano, hit and scratched at anyone that came near her, and tried to throw her mattress. As soon as she calmed down she ran around looking for band-aids, gave me kisses in case the scratch hurt, went to bed like a little angel. The next day she didn’t even remember it.
We’ve learned to recognize when it’s coming and how to mitigate. Her ped says it’s normal and she’ll grow out of it. My other kids and I joke that she’s Wa-Nora when she acts like that (like Mario and Wario).
Organizing help says
Guys, my 7-year-old’s teeny tiny objects du jour are driving me insane. They are all over her room, at all times. Jewelry, erasers, doll shoes, hair accessories, you name it. Everything has a second purpose beyond what they were intended for. Inventive, yes, but the constant clutter is real. Providing little organizational baskets hasn’t done squat to curb this madness. I do not remember having this problem with my older kid (boy), but he also didn’t play with stuff in the same way as my daughter does. Help? Any ideas for getting organized? She considers them all her “treasures,” and I don’t think getting rid of them is the answer. It’s very possible that I need to be more hands-on in helping her pick stuff up, but I get too overwhelmed to deal with it without losing my patience.
Anonymous says
She has to pick it all up, sort it, and put it away in the proper baskets before bed every night. Anything that isn’t sorted and put away gets scooped up and put in time-out for several days.
Anonymous says
My 4-yo’s motto is “let’s keep it out of the landfill and put it on my art cart!” So. Much. Clutter. I think you just showed me my future.
Spirograph says
Do they need to be organized? My 6 year old is exactly like this, and she just has a “treasure box” on her nightstand. It’s a shoebox that she bedazzled. Everything just goes in there in a big jumble. If your goal is to just not have them laying around waiting to stab your feet, it’s much easier to get things off the floor when you’re not worried about exactly where they belong.
anon says
You’re probably right. In trying to be organized, I think it’s had the opposite effect.
Allie says
So when I was a kid my mom’s hard and fast rule was I had to keep a clear “path” so she could get a around the room (door to bed, dresser, and bed to window). It was a small room so that essentially gave me two mess areas. Would that work? She can have her clutter but you don’t risk stepping on it?
rakma says
Seconding some ideas above, the answer for us was ‘big basket’ rather than little baskets with categories. Too many things had overlapping categories and it caused decision fatigue, or one special rock went in it’s own basket while seemingly hundreds of other things couldn’t be put away because they weren’t rocks.
One giant basket for ‘special things’ and she can put smaller baskets of special categories in the big basket if that helps. Reusable ziplock bags have also helped with the ‘categorizing’ of the special things.
Anonymous says
The kids bookcases and dresser tops in bedrooms and art table in family room can be as messy as they want but the floor has to be clear is our rule.
Jdmd says
Commiseration. My 6-year-old is exactly the same and it drives me bananas. Last night she insisted on making platform flip flops for her Barbie out of foam paper and drinking straws. And all she wants to do is watch crafting videos on YouTube. I really hate how quickly the junk accumulates.
I try to do an after-hours culling every week, and I tell her that anything left out of her designated areas (she has her own 3-shelf cabinet where she can keep her supplies, diary, toys, etc) will get thrown away. So she’s allowed to make all the tiny crafts but she has to keep it corralled.
anon says
OP agian. Our daughters would be great friends. :) She literally has what she calls a “trash house” that she constructed from cereal boxes and clean takeout containers. I applaud the ingenuity, but I have to turn a blind eye.
Curious says
Oh bless my mother. I was this child.
Anonymous says
1) bins or boxes or buckets. I use costco animal cracker containers for LOLs, a ziplock for rainbow loom, shoe boxes for other misc tiny stuff.
2) She keeps her room clean or you go in and start taking toys away OR
3) Just shut the door.
I might out of the goodness of my heart help her out once in a while but for the most part she has to keep it clean or I take it away.
Anon says
What are some of your favorite toy/activities for older kids? Trying to buy some new ones for my 8 and 10 year olds
Spirograph says
What are they interested in? This is so personality dependent. My 8 year old doesn’t do toys much anymore, he likes beyblades, card/board games, video games (including storyboarding his own and coding practice), sports, remote-controlled cars, and weaponry — sticks as swords, nerf guns, etc. He’ll play with blocks, trains, cars, whatever if the younger kids are playing with it, and still dresses up occasionally, but he’s not usually one to sit down and build lego on his own.
At that age, I remember really liking a magnetism kit, and building my own circuits (light up a lightbulb, make a buzzer sound, etc) with hardware store stuff.
Anon says
My 8 year old used her bday money to buy a Kindle Kids, and it’s been a big hit this summer. She feels grownup with a Kindle to read on, and the amount of books on there has kept her interest. (So much so that now my 6 year old who can barely read wants one too!)
Other than that, surprising toys (beyond Legos and LOL and HotWheels) they’ve enjoyed have been spy gear (walkie talkies, binoculars, etc), Instax cameras and lots of film, the game Yahtzee, and tons of fidget toys. Last fall we bought a Switch for the family, and it’s been fun to work together to get through Lego Harry Potter and play MarioKart and build Minecraft worlds together. On their already-started Christmas list is a Razor scooter and a climbing dome for the backyard.
RR says
My now-13 year olds love Kiwi Crate. My daughter gets maker, and my son gets tinker. They’ve gotten them for years. My 8 year old gets the kiwi Kiwi Crate. They all love crafting. So we have bins for painting, slime making, coloring, crafting.
Anonymous says
Nintendo Switch
Giant LEGO kits, if you can stand to have the finished products fill up all of your bookcases to catch dust or can convince your children to disassemble them
LittleBits
Snap Circuits
Craft books and kits
Cookbooks
Puzzle books–logic puzzles, really complicated dot-to-dots, etc.
iPad with carefully selected apps
Paint By Sticker
Anonymous says
I think card games are a pretty good hit for kids in that age range. Exploding kittens, sleeping queens, that sort of thing.
The rest is so kid specific!
Clean your room! says
Ok, this is basic adulting, but for those of you who *do not have outside help* to clean your house, how often do you actually clean? For example, I change the sheets on the beds maybe once per month, but realistically its more like every 6 weeks. (The internet tells me they could be changed weekly?? what??). I clean the toilets when they get gross, like every 3 weeks. I basically never clean the shower/tubs… until they are gross, like once a year. I am militant about the kitchen and never leave dishes in the sink overnight, wipe down all countertops and table nightly, sweep nightly, and vaccuum weekly and generally try to stay tidy. But am I way off with the sheets?
Cb says
You are definitely way off with the sheets :) I have high tolerance for muckiness but I want a clean bed. We shower before bed and change our sheets weekly, and kiddo’s sheets on the same schedule. Change them tonight and enjoy your nice clean bed.
Allie says
Agreed :) I have a pretty high tolerance for dirty sheets and the absolute longest I’d go is three weeks a few times a year and that’s just when regular every other week sheet changes slip for whatever reason.
Anonymous says
We change sheets and towels weekly because ick! Floors, bathrooms, and kitchen are ideally cleaned weekly but sometimes we run out of time. We live in a humid climate, and letting the bathroom go two weeks means I spend two hours or more scrubbing off mildew and may need to replace the shower caulk. Quick touch-ups of floors with the Swiffer or cordless vacuum as necessary in between cleanings.
Anonymous says
It seems like your bathroom/bedroom routines are pretty different from your kitchen routine. Not right or wrong but a surprising contrast.
We change sheets weekly. If it’s a particularly crazy week or we leave for vacation mid week or something I might just do pillow cases. Hand towels in bathroom every second day. Bath towels used 2-3 times (everyone has their own). We have cleaners every two weeks but on week without cleaners we vacuum, quick wipe down in the shower/sink with a lysol wipe (is your tub not gross if you clean it yearly?), scrubbing bubbles puck in the toilet. DH is in charge of dishes and usually runs the dishwasher every night before bed.
anon says
This is pretty much our schedule, too. IDK, things get gross and I don’t have much tolerance for grime, I guess. Once it’s part of the routine, it doesn’t take nearly as long as it does when you let it pile up. I don’t know how a toilet would stay clean for three weeks. In our house, they get a quick swish a few times a week.
Anoon says
Yeah, I mean this is why I asked specifically for people without outside help. I hear you that you are cleaning on the weeks the cleaners don’t come, but I think there is a big difference between having biweekly help and having none– like how many hours of cleaning are you outsourcing? When we had cleaners, 3 people came for about 2 hours every other week, i.e., 12 hours a month. I personally do not have an additional 12 hours in a month to do more cleaning, so I skirt some things (sheets!) and focus on others (my kitchen is really clean, every day).
Anonymous says
Having cleaners means a wide range of things to different people. We have a pretty basic service and when they didn’t come during the first part of covid last year, DH and I just split up what they did and did the work on Saturday mornings. Took us a couple hours as we’re not professionals.
Our service is 3 people for an hour every second week. They dust and vacuum and mop upper and main floor, tidy bedrooms, clean one full bathroom (kids) and the main floor half bathroom plus clean kitchen counters and microwave. The other two full bathrooms are used less and are generally tidier so we do those ourselves vs pay for additional service (primary bedroom bathroom and basement bathroom). We also do windows and wash down kitchen cupboard doors ourselves. I have them wash the baseboards throughout the house a couple times a year. We do the basement floors (exercise room and home office) ourselves.
I don’t think cleaners change the routine, just whether you do it or they do it. And some of it is personal preference. I don’t care about dishes in the sink overnight but I hate sheets that are not fresh. I do laundry because that’s what I care about, DH is in charge of dishes because that’s his thing. If kitchen cleaning is your thing, can sheets/bathrooms be your DH’s? There’s also a lot of room between weekly vs. every 6 weeks.
anon says
Eeesh … 6 weeks is really pushing it with the sheets. I do wash my sheets weekly; kids’ sheets get washed every 2 weeks. This was my practice long before the internet said so.
Anoon says
Interesting contrast on kids vs. adults sheets. Is it because your kids bathe before bed and you do not?
anon says
Older kid showers nightly. Younger kid bathes every 2 nights. Their bedding is just a lot cleaner than ours! I sometimes rinse off before bed, but DH does not. I don’t know how to say this delicately, but I’ve become a more sweaty sleeper in my late 30s-early 40s. And, um, sometimes there are other fluids.
ElisaR says
ha! yes.
Anonymous says
My kids sheets get washed when they wet the bed, which is 1-3 times a week for two of them. My water bill is insane. *sigh*
2 weeks is my limit for my own sheets. I’m usually a night shower person, and if I’m lazy and go to bed without showering, I’ll often wash them sooner.
Mary Moo Cow says
In one her the last magazines, Oprah said she changed her sheets daily — whhhaattt? But weekly is the norm, especially if you sweat at night, allow animals on the bed, don’t shower every day, etc. I try to change our sheets weekly, but sometimes it is every other week. I clean our bathrooms (mirror, sink, toilets, tub or shower) every other week, but may do a wipe down of the mirror and countertops when I see visible grime.
Anonymous says
Fresh sheets are so nice and smooth and crisp that I can see why Oprah would have her servants change them daily.
SC says
If I were Oprah, I’d have my sheets changed daily. A freshly made-up bed is one of my favorite things.
Spirograph says
Same! (although the environmental impact or all the washing might give me pause)
SC says
If I can fantasize about daily sheet washing, I can add solar/wind power and a water cistern :-)
Anonymous says
love it. adding sustainable energy and daily housekeeping help to #lifegoals.
buffybot says
Way off with the sheets. : )
I mean, I definitely knew boys in college who probably made it multiple months without changing sheets but I think you’re stretching it beyond reason. I respect and aspire to a weekly change but realistically change every 2 weeks whether or not we have a housecleaner come – and usually swap out pillowcases weekly.
Also I think bathrooms benefit from a clean every 2 weeks at a minimum and prefer to do a “quick” interim clean in the off weeks with a wipedown of counters and quick clean of the toilet.
EP-er says
I do like weekly sheet changes. They are crisp and clean and bring me joy. So Sunday mornings are clean sheet days. (Personally, just me… I can’t imagine 6 week sheets.) We just did a big clean out of the kids’ rooms and I was kind of disgusted…. so we are trying a new habit where everyone dusts/vacuums/strips beds/tidies at the same time. I’m hoping that by making it a routine, we’ll all be better about it. (Kids are 13 & 9 and there is really no excuse.)
That said… I’m not a very good housekeeper. I miss my cleaning lady so much. We stay on top of the clutter, but I have started washing the kitchen floor while on conference calls because there is just no time for it! My husband takes care of the bathrooms. There just doesn’t seem to be enough hours in the day to maintain the home like my SAHM did.
Anoon says
Yes, my standard is way off considering my poor mother cleaned every day of her SAHM life. Meanwhile, I work my dad’s hours but still feel obligated to keep my mom’s cleaning standards…
EP-er says
That sums it up perfectly. I have tried to let go of the guilt I feel about that. Ignoring my mother’s comments (“I guess I just didn’t do a good enough jo teaching you how to clean!” when I got a cleaning lady) and accepting that it really is okay for my husband to clean the showers himself have helped. I try to imagine what good example I am setting for my kids to have parents who *both* clean the house.
Anonymous says
This. Modeling matters so much. One of the twins announced at bedtime last night that when he grows up his job will be dishes like his dad because that’s better than laundry like mom does. FWIW I have laundry because I prefer that to dishes.
More Sleep Would Be Nice says
Sheets = weekly, and DEFINITELY showering 1x/day at least, ideally before bed. This was even the case when we lived in apartments and had to go to the laundromat or the shared washer/dryers.
We do hire out cleaning, but even when we didn’t (pre-big jobs), we were doing bathroom cleaning, furniture polish, etc. monthly – longer if it was a busy time or if we were on travel, and everything else got a vacuum and wipe down at least weekly.
rakma says
Does it work for you? Do you start to feel like, ugh, I should change these sheets but I’m too tired every night before bed? Or does the 4-weeks/6-weeks feel ok for you? Could you buy a few extra sets of sheets so changing the sheets isn’t always changing, then washing, then drying, then making the bed? Could you add a small outside help (laundry drop off, grocery delivery, something that saves you an hour or two but isn’t the time/money commitment of hiring a person?)
I could spend all my non-working non-parenting time cleaning, and I still wouldn’t be able to meet the standards of any general cleaning schedule from the internet. I focus on the things that make me feel functional (which like you centers on the kitchen) and do the other stuff as I have time/energy.
Anoon says
This is excellent advice, thanks. I DO need a spare set of sheets for each bed as you hit the nail on the head: when I change the sheets it involves washing them, too, which I just don’t often have time to do (there are only four of us but my lord the laundry never ends…). How had this not occurred to me before?
A clean kitchen is a necessity for me, and I hear that others on this board get that kind of relief from clean sheets. Yours is a good reminder to focus on the things that work for me.
rakma says
Yes, get the spare sheets! I find I can pull the sheets off and replace them as one task, then the washing of the sheets is a separate task, so I don’t have to devote half a day to changing the sheets.
So Anon says
Meh. Its whatever works for you. I change out my sheets every two weeks – right before my kids go to their Dad so that I have a lovely clean bed to sleep in on my one night of sleep. I change my kids’ sheets like maybe every 6 weeks? If they get spilled on or whatever, then they get changed more frequently. I clean the toilets weekly because I have a 10 year old son, and vacuum a couple times a week because of my giant shedding dog.
AwayEmily says
Whoa, are you me?? Literally everything you said is our cleaning routine as well. I’m super compulsive about the kitchen but deep clean the shower/tub only rarely. And sheets are yeah, maybe once a month. I just hate putting them back on the bed SO MUCH. It’s pure laziness, I love the feel of clean sheets and really do aspire to change them more often, it’s just so daunting.
Boston Legal Eagle says
Yeah, this is why I’ve tasked our cleaning people with changing all the sheets – it was such a pain for me to do, but I like having fresh sheets. So now, all of our sheets are changed every 2 weeks when they come. We don’t clean the shower, toilets or bathtubs in between their visits but kitchen is cleaned every night and we do pick up toys and whatnot.
Anoon says
This question is not for youuuuuuuuuu.
AwayEmily says
I for one appreciate the laziness solidarity.
Anoon says
But if I HAD a cleaning service, I would not have this problem. I asked this above, but how many hours of cleaning are you outsourcing? When we had cleaners, 3 people came for about 2 hours every other week, i.e., 12 hours a month. I personally do not have an additional 12 hours in a month to do more cleaning, so some things gotta give.
AwayEmily says
I don’t have cleaners, so I’m outsourcing zero hours (unless you count my 3yo “spraying” the windows with water and wiping them down, which I think somehow actually makes them dirtier). Hence the rarely-washed sheets and rarely-cleaned bathrooms.
Anoon says
Sorry, I meant for Boston Legal Eagle, above.
GCA says
Heh, solidarity in laziness. We don’t have cleaners either, but DH is a Clean Person and I am a (relatively) Tidy (but Extremely Lazy) Person. I change and wash the sheets every 3 or 4 weeks and vacuum weekly (or I should say: weekly is when I finally get fed up of chasing dust bunnies). Bath towels, hand towels and cloth napkins get washed every 3 or 4 days, sometimes their own load, sometimes in with the other laundry if there isn’t a high volume of stuff. DH deep cleans bathrooms once a month or so, bleaches out our fridge and trash bins every month, and does a quick wipedown/ sweep/ dishwasher run in the kitchen every night. All of this seems somehow harder in summer…perhaps because we are out of the house and outdoors for much of the weekend so there’s less time at home to get it all done!
SC says
We wash our sheets and towels weekly, but Kiddo sleeps in a top bunk, and honestly, that’s more like monthly. (Sorry Kiddo.) We are about the same on bathrooms–when they look dirty. DH usually cleans the kitchen in the morning, actually. We have a Roomba that vacuums daily, but it’s temperamental lately. We mop like every 6 months. Our house is not at a cleanliness level one would aspire to, and I would love to have it cleaner, but we never seem to get around to much more than dishes and laundry.
FFS says
We’re the same as you with sheets, possibly even a little worse! I like having fresh sheets on the bed, I just can’t bring myself to care enough to do it regularly. We’re not sweaty, we don’t do it that often, no animals on the bed, and remember how I just don’t care? We shower in the mornings anyway so I’m just not that worried about sleeping in dead skin and oils. I notice fresh sheets on the first day, but I truly don’t notice a difference between night 2 and night 22. I change the kid sheets every couple weeks because they’re sweaty sleepers.
The rest, yeah, I’m more of a “clean it when it’s dirty” person, but our carpet and kitchen counters hide dirt TOO well so I’m more proactive with those. We also just got a robot mop and run that weekly now since we mopped basically never before.
Anonymous says
Robot mop???? How did I not know this is a thing! I hate mopping! What did you get?
So Anon says
Agree! Please share details on the robot mop!
FFS says
It’s the same people who make the Roomba! The name is Bravaa and we have the Jet 240 I think, which is the smallest/cheapest model, since we mainly only use it in our kitchen/breakfast room. We haven’t tried it in bathrooms yet, but all of our bathrooms are pretty small. I really like it, and it’s made a big difference. The bulk of my vacuuming time is actually just picking stuff (toys) up off the floor so the Roomba never made sense for us, but I really like having the kitchen and breakfast rooms mopped every week.
CCLA says
We recently got one of these! It’s awesome, very quiet and you can have it do just certain rooms so DH sets it up to mop the dining and kitchen areas maybe twice a week, rest of the house every week. Before this, I think we mopped maybe every quarter. This was a big upgrade along with a newer roomba that self empties so it will do our whole house in one pass as long as it doesn’t get stuck (before it would fill up its bin and only do part of the house, annoying since we usually run it while we are out of the house).
Anonymous says
Re. the Roomba, how do dogs react to it? Our large dog is terrified of the vacuum cleaner and thinks that the radio-controlled car is a prey object, so I can’t guess at whether she’d hide from a Roomba or destroy it.
Mary Moo Cow says
RE: dogs and Roomba, our older dog never was bothered by it. He’ll leave the room when it starts up and move from room to room to avoid it, but he doesn’t whine or bark at it. And he’s pretty neurotic.
Anon for this says
Sheets – I aim for weekly and sometimes it’s every 2 weeks. Kids’s sheets… well, for a while the plan was ‘oh, I’ll have to wash it when they wet the bed’. And then… people stopped doing that so I started having to remember to consciously change their sheets more often.
Bathrooms – I do Thursday nights. Toilets actually cleaned, shower/tub wiped weekly, scrubbed more like monthly.
Kitchen gets cleaned daily, I spot vacuum with my cordless Dyson every other day or so and do a big vacuum on Monday nights.
Spirograph says
Your toilets only get gross every 3 weeks?! You must not have boys. :) I do have outside help in the form of a cleaner who comes every two weeks, but I clean the sink, toilet, and mirror in between, at least twice a week, “swish and swipe” style a la Fly Lady. I work from home and I don’t like my work bathroom to be icky. When I didn’t have a cleaner (pre-kids, just me, or me and husband), I’d clean the bathroom including the shower/tub at least every week. It doesn’t take long at all if you keep up with it regularly!
Where I fall down is floors. I run the roomba every day or two and also spot vacuum as needed, but I haaaaate to sweep and mop. These were my husband’s jobs, and probably got done only every 2 weeks.
Our cleaner changes the sheets when she comes, and I often change mine once in between as well. 4-6 weeks would be way too long for me.
Anonymous says
If the sheets are a problem, I recommend buying another set or two. It’s much easier to change the sheets when all you have to do is literally change them quick and then can launder the dirty sheets the next day or whatever.
Anonymous says
This. We have three sets for each bed in the house. Smallish linen closest so one set on the bed, one in the linen closet and one (older) set in a storage tote in the basement. When we buy new sheets the oldest set gets cut up for rags. I’d never get my sheets changed if I had to wash and dry them before putting back on. Usually I change the 3 kids beds while DH bathes them on Sunday nights and then I change ours while he reads to them. Extra spare set in basement has been clutch with little kids and various night situations.
anon says
we are night showerers and change sheets prob every three weeks.
i clean the tub and toilet every two weeks, i do not like grime.
AnonATL says
This is what we do. Change the sheets 2-3 weeks. I usually cleans toilets and showers every couple of weeks because it bothers me, especially toilets. My husband could go months with it and not care.
Kitchen is wiped down nightly. No dishes left in sink unless they really need a soak. Husband is very particular about a clean kitchen so that’s his job.
Floors are swept weekly. We aim to mop weekly but its more realistically 2-3 weeks
2 Cents says
No cleaners or outside help. Sheets are done weekly (or close to it). Kitchen is nearly every night. Vacuuming gets short shrift but I swiffer near daily (all hardwood floors), then dust bust the small pile of stuff. Laundry is ongoing.
Anon says
For the 11 months during Covid we did not have outside help (and for before we got married and hired outside help), I changed sheets every other week, scrubbed bathrooms (showers, tubs, sinks) every other week, scrubbed toilets weekly as ours get gross fast for whatever reason, dusted and vacuumed weekly (plus spot vacuuming as needed) and did a thorough mop every other week with a damp microfiber “wash” of the floors in the off weeks. Kitchen counters got wiped down and sink got scrubbed as needed, usually weekly unless we did mostly outdoor eating. To make it slightly more manageable, I cleaned for a few hours every weekend, but I alternated which rooms or bathrooms I was doing so that everything got hit every other week. You are probably right that it worked out to around 12 hours a month.
Anonymous says
Yeah, you’ve gotta change your sheets more than every six weeks. Maybe go watch one of those freaky videos showing all the dust and dead skin cells that build up in your sheets? This is definitely something that should be done more often if only to reduce allergens and irritants for your kids. Household chemicals and pollutants tracked from outside build up in dust, your kids spent 8+ hours a day in bed, and it’s an easy way to make their environment cleaner. This is one of those things where it’s really, truly not that hard to just get it done – you can make beds in just a few minutes each! No need for adulting superhero action here.
Anon says
I clean my entire house once a month. I spot clean areas that need it between my monthly cleaning sessions and do regular upkeep in the kitchen. I wash sheets once a month unless they look gross and then do it sooner. I actually have a detailed checklist of what to clean and it makes me feel better because I can add to it or plan to do more or less, but at least I have a concept of what really needs to be done and I don’t have to remember it all.
Anon. says
We have cleaners now who change the sheets every other week but sometimes I forget to set out clean sheets for them which means it’s a month. Before we had cleaners, yeah it was definitely a month or longer. Except when I was postpartum and had the worst night sweats. If it’s not grossing you out, who cares how frequently the rest of the world changes their sheets.
Anon says
Yeah, exactly. If you have cleaners, great! But if you are doing the housework yourself, all of the tasks together are really labor intensive and time consuming, and washing sheets once a month may be what’s realistic, and that’s usually fine. I think you have to have a “good enough” approach as a working mom if you can’t outsource it.
IHeartBacon says
Exactly. I cannot stand a messy house, but my house gets pretty messy between cleanings, and other than giving up the time to do other things I find more important than having a perfectly clean house every day, I just live with it.
As for other people’s homes and their messiness level, I kind of don’t care. It’s like how I feel about how often other people bathe: unless I can smell you and your smell really bothers me, it’s really none of my business. Except for washing hands after you go to the restroom. I will call you out on it because you could be spreading germs, bacteria, fecal matter, etc, and that could affect me.
Anonymous says
We do sheets and towels roughly every 10 days-2 weeks. Basically every time we do the laundry we do either the towels or the sheets. I vacuum and mop our floors in the main living areas weekly. I clean the toilets and bathroom surfaces when they start bothering me (maybe every 2 weeks?). I clean the shower/tub no more than 1x a month, probably much less. My husband dusts sporadically and does some more deep cleaning stuff occasionally (kitchen cabinets, wall scuffs, window cleaning 2x/year, etc). We have 1 kid and live in a 1200 sq ft apartment.
Anonymous says
Also, we clean up the kitchen every night and I do some spot cleaning of the toilet seats almost daily.
IHeartBacon says
Well, it sounds like the area you focus on is the kitchen, which sounds pretty spotless on a daily basis. I think this is good because the kitchen is more likely to attract bugs and rodents because of food, crumbs, spills, etc. The other areas (bathroom, bedsheets), kind of go to your own personal cleanliness tolerance. The inside of a toilet might be dirty, but if it doesn’t bother you (and you don’t have guests who are using that toilet), I think my answer is: meh, so what?
As for your question, before I had outside help, I spent 4-5 hours every Saturday morning cleaning my entire house. My husband helped, but he wasn’t proactive; he would just do the tasks I instructed him to do. My Saturday chore list:
Bedrooms (clear and dust all surfaces; wash sheets and make beds; pick up all stuff on the floor; sweep; mop)
Bath (scrub shower stall and shower floor; scrub inside toilet and wipe exterior of toilet with Clorox wipes; pick up all clutter; winded mirror; scrub sinks; wipe counter; sweep; mop; take out trash)
Living Room (clear and dust all surfaces; pick up all clutter; wash and replace removable couch covers; sweep; mop)
Kitchen (wash and put away all dishes; wipe down all counters; wipe down all countertops; wipe down stovetop; scrub sink and then fill it with bleach water for 10 minutes; pick up all clutter; sweep; mop; take out trash)
Laundry room (pick up all clutter; wipe tops of machines; sweep; mop; take out trash)
Kitchen trash is taken out daily. Dishes were washed daily, but only once a day at the end of the day. Otherwise, there was no general tidying during the week. The house just was what it was by Saturday morning and then we got to work on the chore list.
About once a month or so, I would do deeper cleaning by adding to the regular list such as clean baseboards; dust hanging light fixtures; empty out all the drawers in one room, purge the contents, and wipe down the inside of the drawer; etc.
Anoon says
16-20 hours per month of saturday time, plus extra for monthly deep cleaning?? [crying emoji]
IHeartBacon says
Exactly. This is why I eventually hired cleaners to come every week once we had a kid. There was no way I was willing to spend that many hours on my weekends cleaning house. When he was a baby, I used that time to take a nap. Now that he is older, I use that time to do family fun stuff.
Anonymous says
That’s WAYYYY too much time and cleaning. Washing and replacing removable couch covers weekly? Heck no.
IHeartBacon says
The removable covers aren’t actually the covers to the couch (like the IKEA couch). It’s a cover that is laid on top of the couch to keep pet hair, food spills (we eat on our couches), etc. off the couch between cleanings. So when I wash and replace them, it’s literally just lifting it off the couch and laying it back on after they are clean.
Anonymous says
That’s actually pretty fast. It takes me 4 hours a week just to do the kitchen and bathrooms, and my husband another hour to mop and vacuum the floors. Dusting is an hour per room if it gets done regularly, much loinger if it’s been neglected. And that doesn’t even count dusting blinds, cleaning windows, cleaning the laundry room, cleaning drawers, etc.
IHeartBacon says
Interesting. Taking an hour to dust each room really surprised me when I read it. I was clearly not dusting as diligently as you. Dusting my bedroom probably takes me 2-3 minutes with a swiffer duster. I run it across the top of a dresser, two night stands, and around the bases of two lamps that are on the nightstands, along the front and top of the couple of picture frames we have scattered on the dresser and night stands, and that’s it. There is literally nothing else for me to dust. If i wanted to really deep-clean dust, I would run the duster along my window sills and baseboards. There are no other horizontal surfaces in my room that would catch dust. Everything we keep is tucked away inside the closet or the drawers, including stuff that may otherwise be on the nightstands (e.g., hand lotion, lip balm, book to read, reading glasses, pen and journal, lube). If something is on my nightstand, it’s usually temporary (e.g., a cup of tea or vase full of flowers) and would get returned to where it belongs when I go through picking up all the clutter.
Curious says
Apparently we are extremely gross, because we *have* cleaners (though they don’t change the sheets) and still change sheets probably every 6 weeks. We should do it more often. We don’t.
EDAnon says
We do it every month. None of us have allergies or weird skin conditions or anything as a result. The kids generally get theirs changed more often due to accidents/their general sandiness.
As an aside, I do have plenty of sets of sheets but I hate washing and folding sheets so changing them more often means more washing and folding, so I don’t do it .
Anon says
I have cleaning help now but cleaned our house for a year solo during most of Covid. I did bathrooms weekly (I could crank all 3 out in less than an hour because I did it so often that everything usually needed a quick spray and wipe vs. a deep clean). Sheets every two weeks. Vacuuming got done once a week (2-3 times a week in high traffic spots) and mopping/Swiffering was done by my husband once a week. Kitchen wipe down and dishes were done daily.
I really liked Clean Mama for getting into a regular cleaning rhythm and then I adapted what worked and what didn’t from her method to fit our family and schedules.
Anonymous says
Wow you’re living in filth. Get a house cleaner.
rakma says
Yes, this too. Gives her ownership of her space while allowing me to get to the dresser to put laundry away.
rakma says
This was supposed to be in reply to the comment about a path in the kids room for Organizing help above.
Recipes says
Hi All. Can folks share their favorite bean recipes with me? All kind of beans are okay, and it can be a main dish or a side. It is unlikely I’d end up using a recipe with a lot of sugar (like most baked beans for example), otherwise no other preferences/needs.
Allie says
Regular slow cooker beans — take very well rinsed dried black or pinto beans, put in a slow cooker with salt, garlic and a bay leaf, and a two inch covering of water for 6.5 hours on low, eat over rice with whatever fixing you’d like.
Tea/Coffee says
Q: are you soaking the beans ahead? If not, my mind is blown and thank you so much for this amazing tip :-)
Signed, my kids will happily eat black beans and rice for lunch every day
Allie says
No! That’s the amazing thing about slow cooker beans. But they do need to be very well rinsed.
More Sleep Would Be Nice says
I’m always surprised at this question…maybe because I am Indian and beans and lentils are a staple. It’s great that folks are eating more of this stuff – it’s delicious and so good for the environment!
Google “daal” – how South Asians have been eating beans and lentils for eons. Lots of IP options.
Also a fan of these recipes:
https://www.gimmesomeoven.com/refried-beans/
https://www.seriouseats.com/pasta-e-ceci-pasta-with-chickpeas
Anon Lawye says
I love that Smitten Kitchen recipe.
GCA says
+1 lots of great Indian recipes out there, and I almost always use the Instant Pot for beans and lentils. We like dal makhani (pro tip from South Asian friends – use Instant Pot to make and freeze large batches of onion masala!) and dal tadka.
Another favorite is mujadara: https://www.feastingathome.com/instant-pot-mujadara/ – each kid can customize their own bowl with veggies, fried onions, sour cream, etc. Finally, we also like lentil soup made with red lentils and coconut milk.
Curious says
Omg the masala tip is genius.
blueberries says
Crunchy chickpeas: toss chickpeas with cumin, olive oil, and salt, spread out on pan and bake at 350 for an hour-ish (shorter for softer, longer for crunchier)
Anon says
Not sure if this is exactly what you intend, but these black bean burritos are a household favorite:
– Half-mash a can of drained black beans, mix in ~1c of sour cream, ~1c of drained canned corn, pinch salt, 1 diced jalapeno (if your kiddos can tolerate some spice), 1 tsp cumin.
– fill warmed tortillas, place in pay, top with satueed onions and/or shredded cheese and/or scallions
– bake at 350 for 25-30 min
– top with more cheese and salsa
Anon says
I use two cans of black beans in this recipe: https://www.101cookbooks.com/archives/melissa-clarks-black-bean-skillet-dinner-recipe.html
Anonymous says
I am enjoying Skinnytaste’s chickpea and egg salad for lunch today. Delicious, easy (except peeling hard boiled eggs), and seems nutritionally virtuous.
AnonATL says
Add your eggs after the water is at a full boil and once they are done, throw them in an ice bath for a while. The shell will come off much more easily.
BlueAlma says
Costco also sells organic peeled hard boiled eggs.
Anon says
Budget Byte’s hearty black bean and corn quesdilla’s are a favorite in this house. I also like Pinch of Yum’s SOS Series crispy black bean tacos.
octagon says
Creamy beans! Delicious with rice and a soft egg, or sometimes we slice some kielbasa into the mix.
http://orangette.net/2015/03/the-bean-doctor/
Anon says
Serious eats has a fantastic lentil soup recipe – https://www.seriouseats.com/easy-lentil-soup-parsley-garlic-lemon-gremolata-recipe
We make these simple but flavorful black beans a few times a month – https://www.splendidtable.org/story/2020/04/13/comforting-black-beans
Work travel and pumping - tips please! says
I have my first post-baby work travel coming up mid-September. I’m still breastfeeding and plan to continue through baby’s first birthday (in mid-October), so I’m not looking for advice on weaning early in anticipation of the trip. For those of you who have pumped while traveling for work, please send me your tips and tricks! I’ll be taking a ~1.5 hour flight in each direction, will be gone for probably 3 days/2 nights, and will cross the US/Canadian border, in case any of that is relevant to your advice. Baby takes bottles of pumped milk during the day from the nanny, so I’m used to pumping – I’ve just never had to do it anywhere but my home office!
HSAL says
I traveled by plane when my twins were 7 months old (so I produced a LOT of milk). Your airport probably has a pumping room, but if not find an empty gate, and pump before your flight. Set up a schedule in advance (mine was roughly 6, 9, 12, 3, before dinner, and bedtime). Take at least one full set of extra parts, a manual pump, and I really liked the Medela pump wipes. Are you pumping and dumping or shipping your milk back? My organization paid for me to ship milk back, but I used Milk Stork and the box was so large I had to check it, which caused TSA to inspect and trigger the freeze packs, so I ended up having to send some of my milk back earlier than planned and then bought a small soft-sided cooler for my return trip. I had the hotel freeze my milk for the return flight, but just kept the first Milk Stork batch cold. Milk Stork can ship to your destination, I believe, but mine was Puerto Rico so I was trying to keep shipment costs down for my org. Since you’ll be going international you might need to check any shipment restrictions. I also vaguely recall a woman in the army who shipped milk back, and she had a whole post or blog about it.
Work travel and pumping - tips please! says
I’m planning on either carrying or shipping the milk back, not pumping and dumping. I nurse (or pump) at ~730am, 11am, 3pm, and 8pm, so I’ll try and stick to that same schedule as much as possible.
Did you bring a manual pump in addition to your regular pump?
HSAL says
Yes, both the electric and the manual pump. I wanted to have the manual pump in case something happened to the electric, but also in case I was out later than planned or couldn’t get to the electric for some reason.
AwayEmily says
+1 to finding an empty gate. I also traveled a lot while pumping and the airport nursing rooms were fine, but (1) sometimes they were way across the airport from where I had to be and (2) they were often in use/locked when I needed them. So I ended up pumping at an empty gate pretty frequently, and honestly found it just as easy. I brought a light scarf with me so I could cover up, faced a window, and nobody ever even came near me.
Pogo says
I used to travel a lot for work and pumped on many trips, domestic and international.
TSA will typically pull you aside for extra inspection, but they cannot force you to open the milk. They often swabbed my hands and the milk and/or freezer packs for explosives.
Mamava pods are awesome, and can be unlocked w/ the app – highly recommend if there is no pumping room. I also used family restrooms in a pinch.
At that age if you are planning on weaning soon anyway, I would consider a manual pump as well, since it gives you a lot more flexibility (like I pumped in a bathroom at dinner once, because I had to go direct from our meeting to dinner & drinks; also way easier to pump in your seat on the plane w/ a manual). If you’re getting 5oz from each side, a manual would take forever, but I wasn’t at 11-12 mos w/ my first.
I would also consider dumping if baby doesn’t need the milk for nutrition at this point, but you want to be able to nurse when you get back. I did that while in Europe and it made it wayyy easier.
When I kept the milk, I brought bags to freeze the milk and a packit cooler. If you don’t have access to a freezer in your room or office, ask the hotel. They ‘checked’ my freezer bag and gave me a stub like when you check your luggage. Depending on how much milk I checked the whole packit cooler + frozen milk, but that was for a longer trip earlier in my nursing journey.
The pump counts as a medical device and not toward your carryon allowance.
I think that’s it… Canada uses the same outlets as US right? Otherwise you need to use a battery pack, you can’t plug your pump in w/ an adaptor.
Work travel and pumping - tips please! says
Thank you! Yes, same outlets.
She doesn’t need the milk (I have ~700oz frozen right now) but I want to continue to provide her with breastmilk in her oatmeal/smoothies/etc. even after I wean, so the more I can put in the freezer now, the longer that will last. Fully recognize this is absolutely a me-thing and that I could pump and dump if it came to it.
Anonymous says
I bought a battery pack for my electric pump, which helped a lot with pumping in airport bathrooms and other unplanned places. I thought it was more efficient than a manual.
AwayEmily says
+1 to getting a battery pack, very much worth the $30. I could never get much with the manual pump.
Anonymous says
My early elementary kid tried to bite me this week (and bared her teeth another time this morning). This is not a behavior we have ever, ever seen before with this kid, although she is struggling with anger generally and has been getting more physically aggressive again. Kiddo is already starting behavioral therapy. What the heck strategies or consequences does one even do with this???? (While I wait for her next therapist appointment to ask the pros…). She doesn’t have many privileges to lose (which isn’t a natural consequence anyway) and in this case I was so mad I was unable to react in the moment – I needed to cool down so I could make a rational decision. Ended up not giving her the treat her sister was getting. At this age not finding time outs help much – use them to let her find her way back to being safe if she’s out of control generally, but they also ratchet things waaaaay up and in this case we were outside and I couldn’t leave toddler to go drag her to her room. What other strategies exist?????
Anonymous says
That’s really tough. It’s good that you have a therapist appointment coming up – mention that you need to physically remove her to her room to get compliance. That’s what stuck out for me – with our kids (including 1 of 3 who has very high emotions), going to their room for a time out is a verbal thing at age 6/7/8. I haven’t physically brought them up for a time out since they were 3/4. I listen for the door closing and they know the time out doesn’t start until they are in their room.
The three things that seem to improve behavior in our house are (1) one on one time with each of mom and dad- sometimes this is just going along for grocery shopping, other times it is a walk or park visit or coffee shop visit together and (2) a chance to talk about their day every day – at dinner time we take turns saying our best thing and our hardest thing – focus on empathy that something was hard (my green marker ran out when I was coloring a tree) not minimizing their problems. We also try to discuss again at bedtime (thanks for telling me about your marker problem earlier, that must have been really hard but I’m glad you had fun drawing with chalk later on). That can serve as a catalyst for more talk sometimes. (3) outside time – we see a big difference in behavior when they don’t get enough outside time to walk/run/play Easiest way we work this into our routine is that DH walks the kids to school every morning. Friends with pets take their kid along for dog walking in the evening as they don’t live close enough to school to walk.
HTH and hang in there.
Anonymous says
Thanks. Kiddo has been in therapy for a few months but it’s… slow. Usually we are needing to carry her to her room because she’s so dysregulated she can’t control her body (hitting but also flopping/flailing and claiming can’t get up etc). Fatigue is a big driver and here I’m just kicking myself because I knew she was too tired to go play outside before bedtime. And turns out needed to use the bathroom which always drives up the aggression. We are working pretty hard on listening to her cues so that we can be in a position to use the mental tools she has…
Anonymous says
It’s so tough. Forgot to feed and water the 6 year old after daycamp yesterday before letting him go out to play and had to stop making dinner and go get him when I heard him stomping on top of the picnic table and shouting at the neighboring kids when the game wasn’t going how he wanted. He was able to bring himself in when I told him to come in but took a while to work himself back down.
Anonymous says
At least I’m not alone!
So Anon says
Can you double down on validating her anger? “Wow! You are so mad! Is your anger this high (waist high) or does it boil all the way to the top of your head?” I go with the approach of all emotions are ok, but some behavior is not ok. Totally ok to be angry, but biting is not ok. Can you give her an alternative way of getting her anger out? Physical exercise? A made up resolution (Wow! It really stinks that it is time to go to the grocery store. If you could, what would you do with the grocery store? Turn it upside down? Become a giant dinosaur and stomp it to bits?!)? It sounds like she may struggle with emotional regulation (which, same with both of my kids). I found that taking away privileges or putting them in a time-out did not help teach them the skills that they needed to regulate their own emotions. Instead, giving voice to those emotions and giving them ok ways to handle was key for both of my kids.
Anon says
This. We say all emotions are okay, but not all behaviors, and spend a lot of time talking about ways to handle emotions.
You can also model this about yourself by narrating your thought process. “Argh. I just had to repeat myself three times and now I’m getting angry! I’ll take a few deep breaths in the other room, and then come back and try to be calmer when I talk to you.” “UGH! I’m trying to order more household supplies and the app just crashed! Now I have to enter them all over again! I really want to throw my phone across the room, but instead I’ll imagine my phone bursting into bits until I laugh, then try again.” It feels ridiculous, but it seems to really help my kids understand that everyone feels bad emotions, and we all have to work to control our behaviors.
Anonymous says
OP- Yes! We definitely do this!!
Anon says
Speaking of cleaning the bathroom… what products/tools/method do you use on your tub? I have a cleaner every 2 weeks but honestly should get in the habit of cleaning the tub on the off weeks too, it’s gross by the time she comes. But I’ve gotten totally out of the habit and I’m not sure what’s the best method.
Mary Moo Cow says
I use Method foaming spray bathroom cleaner and an OXO extendable brush for the showers and tubs. It wasn’t until I bought the extendable brush/sponge thing that I actually cleaned the walls; it was just too annoying to stand in the tub and clean. I squeegee the glass shower walls after every shower, and that makes a big difference in keeping it clean. I used to spray with Method daily cleaner, but have gotten out of the habit. I like Method because it works and smells better to me than Scrubbing Bubbles, etc.
Anonymous says
We get hard water buildup plus soap scum. I find that Kaboom plus a scrub brush removes it best. If it gets really bad I follow up with a Mr. Clean bath eraser.
FVNC says
Comet with a scrub brush is the only way I can get my porcelain tubs clean.
Anon says
On the porcelain tub and tile shower (DD’s) I use method antibacterial bathroom cleaner (citrus) or the method foaming tub and tile spray (eucalyptus I think). Foaming works better on soap scum but isn’t disinfecting. Spray, let soak for 5-10 minutes to do the work, then wipe with a microfiber rag. If there is the pink slime stuff or mildew starting to grow, I hit the trouble spots with a bleach foaming bathroom cleaner (brand agnostic) for the required amount of time, which ends up being about once a month. Pre-DD I used a disinfecting scrubbing bubbles spray foam in a green and orange can which worked wonders, but I try to go more natural since DD is now the primary user.
For my travertine master shower that came with our house, same process but with a special cleaner for natural travertine (Granite Gold). If I ever get to choose my shower tile (e.g., we redo it in 15 years or buy a new house), never again will it be natural stone because it is a royal pain to keep clean without damaging the stone.
Anonymous says
What athletic sneakers are your elem girls wearing these days? My kiddo is old enough to wear tie shoes but her size (2) is mostly still those velcro straps.
I’m looking for something that isn’t too babyish, trendy, but also sporty and fun. We got my son new balance fuelcores and I guess I want something equally cool (sister loves them but doesn’t want to “match.”) Shoes that tie are fine if they come in her size!
RR says
My 7 year old is in Vans–she has several pairs this year. Cute high tops that zip in the back, yellow ones that tie with a rainbow ribbon, and some glitter slip ons. All from Zappos.com. They are good about covering little kid sizes and bigger kid sizes.
Anonymous says
OP here. we have Vans actually! But I need athletic shoes. For sports and stuff.
Anonymous says
Adidas has been popular for 3rd- 5th grades at my kid’s school. Sneakers are usually velcro in sizes 11-2 and then laces in 3+ but Adidas, Nike and Reebok all have size 2 with laces I think.
Anonymous says
If you happen to see any laced size 2s please link them here! The adidas ones are the ones I was looking at but they have the velcro in her size which she doesn’t really like.
Anonymous says
Fortarun and Duramo SL from Adidas both come in size 2 with laces. The ‘girl’ colors seem to sell out in that size fairly quickly though. Duramo are only on the website in black right now – the pink are gone.
Anonymous says
Zappos has some in size 2 Adidas if you search by lace up styles and size 2 – link to follow.
Anonymous says
https://www.zappos.com/p/adidas-kids-courtjam-x-tennis-little-kid-big-kid-white-screaming-pink-acid-orange/product/9234298/color/890270
Anonymous says
My daughter has Skechers Sport Ultraflex slip-ons. They are a coral / blue / purple gradient and very cool (her BFF got the same shoes because she loved them so much)
DLC says
My kid has New Balance, but honestly, I think the best shoe is the the that fits and supports the best, especially for sports and running. We went to the show store, tried on many pairs and ended up with New Balance because my kid has slight pronation and an unsupportive shoe would lead to her hurting herself in the long run.