Family Friday: Perplexus Original Interactive Maze Game

When my husband and I were at a holiday party a few years back, one of the kids in attendance was gifted this game. It was passed around the room, and after we each took a turn we immediately went to our phones and ordered the game for ourselves. This toy is basically a 3-D puzzle where you roll a little ball down various ramps in numerical order, turning the sphere in your hands depending on which way the ball needs to go. It takes hand-eye coordination and a lot of patience, but it’s super addicting and fun! The only downside is that it’s not a great toy for sharing among siblings/friends, as only one person can play with it at a time. However, it does get competitive in a fun way. I would recommend this for older kids and definitely adults. It’s $19 at Amazon. Perplexus Original Interactive Maze Game

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  1. You guys! Apparently my nursery logistics complaints triggered a shift in the universe. I got a call from 3-year waitlist nursery and they have a spot for us starting this summer. It is a 6 minute walk from my work, 10 minute walk from husband’s. I could do a lunchtime nursing session if I wanted to. They make their own bread each morning, bake a cake with the birthday boy/girl, children can roam freely between indoors and outdoors, and kids spend at least one morning a week at forest school. Pretty sure it is the most hippy dippy nursery but I’m so excited.

  2. Husbands says:

    So, I know we do a lot of complaining about husbands on this board. But mine is pretty awesome today. We have a ton of family (both sides) coming in this weekend for our daughter’s baptism. We’ve both been crushed at work and doing extra work in the evenings and early mornings while still preparing for the crowd this weekend. Luckily, we both took some time a few weeks ago to do a bunch of spring cleaning, so we’re still riding that. Yesterday he told me he was taking this morning off (can’t miss a meeting this afternoon) to clean the house and mow the lawn in preparation for our guests. He’s currently cleaning up a storm while I WFH (and post on here). So here’s a shout out to husbands getting it right and some positive vibes going into a beautiful weekend in my neck of the woods.

    • Spirograph says:

      This made me smile. Good luck with all the guests, and I hope you have a great weekend celebrating your daughter’s baptism!

    • Boston Legal Eagle says:

      I hesitate to post this because I feel like it’s posting on a thread asking for advice on a kid that wakes up multiple times a night, “well, my kid slept through the night since 6 weeks so…” but I have to say that my husband is great, truly an equal co-parent and values the parenting responsibilities, as well as both of our careers. This should be the norm, and not the exception, and I hope there are other husbands out here who fit this, it’s just that we don’t post about them. My biggest wish is for my son to grow up to be like him, and I’m grateful that he has such a great role model.

      Just want to send some encouragement for those who might be reading this and thinking that all husbands turn into man-babies as soon as kids enter the picture – not all do!

      • Anonymous says:

        Mine too, most of the time. I mentioned yesterday that he had knee surgery a few weeks ago, and doing ALL the things made it really apparent how much he usually helps.

        • Mama Llama says:

          I’ve had similar experiences. Sometimes I get frustrated because my husband does all the routine things, and I do all the things that require thought and planning, but when he’s out of town I realize how nice it is that I never have to take out the trash, do dishes, do our kid’s laundry, walk the dog, etc., etc.

      • I'm having a bad day... says:

        As someone who does complain about her husband, this is actually reassuring to hear. One of the insidious things about there not being a fair load is that someone (the mom, the less-than-50%-dad, one of their mothers) points out some schlub who can’t even be trusted, or bothered, to be alone with his kid for 15 minutes or do laundry without ruining everything.

        I think where it does get annoying, and I don’t see it on here at ALL, is the ‘well, I just told him what the problem was, and boom it was fixed’ – which was my major issue with “Drop the Ball” — that’s the equivalent of assuming your kid’s ability to sleep through the night at 6 weeks is because of a strict nap schedule or something.

        • Husbands says:

          A big key in our relationship is not getting caught in the moment. Having a calm discussion of why X, Y, and/or Z is causing you issues, and then “can we come up with a mutually acceptable way to decrease my stress”. Or calmly and concretely saying “I need you to watch Kiddo while I make dinner because it is very hands on, and I can’t be making sure she isn’t touching the stove the whole time…” I know that feels like stuff they should know…but it really isn’t. No one can read minds. Calm communication is so key.

        • Anonymous says:

          I’m the one who hated everyone else’s husbands yesterday and yes! That was the point I was trying to make… I feel like some women resign themselves to doing everything themselves because that’s “just the way men are” and no… a lot of men are pulling their load invisibly. As it should be, because I pull my load invisibly too! It just seems so easy with this newest crop of articles to think all ladies are stuck in this awful position and oh no, what can you do, society is ruined, this is an epidemic! Like no, we just probably don’t hear enough from women whose husbands do enough. I’ve been hoping lately that by describing in detail to my friends with slacker husbands just how much my own husband does, they’ll harass theirs into doing their fair share. Unlikely but I remain optimistic.

      • +1, but it’s so hard to screen for this kind of thing before marriage, or before the added responsibility and logistical pressure of kids. I haven’t read Drop the Ball, but…the ‘I pointed out X, and boom, it was fixed’ is actually sort of how it works in my household. It did take about 8 or 9 months after kiddo was born to even out, and I am curious about how it will play out with 2 kids.

        Unfortunately I’m still not sure what we did to nudge it along, aside from clear and frequent communication, but he just sort of *got it* that I was managing a lot of the household labor and being default parent, and gradually began taking over/ chipping in. I still handle 80-90% of cooking and meal planning, as well as kid clothing, gear, intensive cleaning (bathrooms, closet purges), and our family social life, but otherwise he does most of the day-to-day household tasks (trash, dishes, recycling, wiping down kitchen and bathroom), doctor’s appointments (including making said appointments! – somehow he is great about this for kiddo and appalling at remembering to make his own), etc. I feel like my husband has been especially great this week because I am 6 months pregnant, just got back from working 14-16-hour days at a conference last week and now am catching up on work backlog, and also came home with a raging cold.

        I suspect what helps is that our work schedules are similarly demanding and similarly flexible. I WFH or from a coworking space; he’s an academic. My work travel is maybe a week at a time, 2-3 times a year; his is typically one larger chunk a year and then brief meetings/ conferences for a couple of days maybe 2-3 times. I don’t think we’d be able to swing this exact division of labor if one of us had a high-travel role – we’d need to sort out something else that feels fair.

        • Anonanonanon says:

          I was having this conversation with a coworker this morning! It is basically IMPOSSIBLE to screen for it before marriage (at least for a first marriage). I was saying how beneficial it was the second time around that I was coming into the marriage with a kid and a career, so I could easily “screen” for it and the expectations were set from day one.

          We have a VERY similar distribution to yours! I prefer that I do the intensive cleaning because that’s the kind of stuff I can kind of schedule for when I feel like it, while the dishes and trash etc. that my husband does have to be done every day. He does most of the child well-visits as well since he simply has more PTO than I do.

          One thing I learned from my first marriage is not to keep score, we all keep it in our own favor if we do. I think this time around my husband and I do a great job of evaluating what makes the most sense at the time. ie if one of us has to stay home with a sick kid, it doesn’t matter who did it last time etc. It matters what makes the most sense that day in terms of PTO balance, who has an important meeting, etc.

          • Glad it worked out for you the second time around! Is it also your husband’s 2nd time around, or his first marriage with a kid?

          • Anonanonanon says:

            His first marriage and first time with a kid around (we’ve since had a second). But he was in his mid-30s when we married so he was used to caring for a house etc. on his own

    • +1. My DH had to be home today because we’re getting new windows. He decided to take the day off and has ambitious plans to: 1) flip all the kids closets to spring clothes 2) make a list of any spring clothes they still need 3) do mega laundry including all the sheets and towels 4) clean out our junk drawer/ section of the room 5) install the new screen door and 6) organize the pantry. If the windows are done early, he’ll head out and buy the clothes on the list.

      He planned all of this without really talking to me, just asking what was on my “spring cleaning” list – the closets/ clothes were my big stressor at home, so he said he’d get that done first. He’s confident he’ll have it all done by the time I pick up the kids after work.

      We’re both excited to see what a day off (that isn’t taken up by sick kids or family vacations) actually looks like. This might be a total game changer in how we approach PTO. It might be worth burning a day in the spring for him, a day in the fall for me, to get these huge chores out of the way so we can actually relax when we’re home together.

      • Wow. That’s an ambitious list. I feel like it would take me a week to do all that! Or maybe my closets and junk drawer are just that terrible.

        • Yes he’s way more efficient than I am at this stuff. I think because I hem and haw and try to be perfect, and he just throws out things. Which is why he’s the right one to be tackling the list, obviously.

  3. anonanon says:

    Nap Mats for Toddlers – Any recommendations? My kid’s school has cots, but all the kids bring nap mats. I see like 50 options on Amazon, should I just randomly choose one? Any that you all particularly like? Thanks!

  4. Does kiwi turn brown if you cut it early? Would like to prepare a fruit salad in advance. Do I need to wait to add the kiwi? I’ve never not eaten it right away!

    • Spirograph says:

      How early are we talking? It doesn’t turn brown, but after a day or two it will turn darker green and the texture will get mushier.

      • About 24 hours. I’m mixing it with cantaloupe, strawberries, and blueberries. I’m not worried about those. But to cut down on my workload at the time of our big family dinner, I might do the other stuff 24 hours in advance and the kiwi the morning of to eat in the late afternoon. Thanks so much!!

        • Anon2 says:

          My mom (who makes fruit salads for gatherings all the time) has luck cutting ahead of time and then mixing at the last minute. She’ll layer in the bowl/container with juiciest fruits at the bottom so they aren’t all marinating in the juices for a day and getting mushy. Maybe layer cantaloupe – strawberries – kiwi – blueberries and mix right before serving.

  5. office pumping says:

    I work at a financial services firm where I’m one of a few non-assistant women (read: v. conservative boys club). Our offices are glass walled w/ wood doors (no locks @ this time.) We have 1 additional bf’ing mom in the office currently, however she doesn’t have an office so the closest conference room (other side of office from me) now has a lock on it so she can use as a bf’ing room. (not a glass walled room)

    Two questions – 1) should I consider using my office to pump? from a productivity standpoint it would be great not to have to leave the office 2-3x a day, but will it be difficult to pump where I work/will my neighbor hear the motor? (spectra)
    2) no one else has shades or blinds on the outer glass of the windows, so would that be weird? What kind of treatments would you do there?

    • Mama Llama says:

      I found pumping at my desk to be ideal because after the letdown I could just go on about my work. I never had any complaints about the noise, and our offices have the thinnest walls ever. For the windows, how about some kind of vinyl cling treatment to make it like frosted glass? That would probably be less obtrusive than blinds. But really that’s a problem for facilities to work out. I would just present it matter-of-fact, “I need privacy in my office to accommodate pumping while I work. What’s the best way to accomplish that?”

      • office pumping says:

        I wish we had a “facilities” dept that new how to deal with this request, but unfortunately it’s typically, a what do you want and how much is it going to cost type of place. (That being said, I’m searching out cute office privacy options and wondering if hiring a Smith & Noble would be a good options. Window treatments have 0% of my brain real estate -I just want something that matches decor and is somewhat cost-effective if I have to eat a portion of the cost to get my own space rather than shared.)

    • I never ended up pumping at work, but we have similar offices, and office policy for any nursing moms that wanted it was to frost the glass (like really frost so you can’t see what’s happening inside) and install a lock. They actually did mine before I went on mat leave, and I have to say I think I would have preferred blinds. While I didn’t love the glass office look when I first started at this firm, I got really used to being able to close my door for calls and be able to signal to people checking in that I was on a call without them opening the door or knocking. If you think that will matter to you, I’d go with blinds, otherwise some sort of frosting may be easiest.

    • Yes!! You should consider using your office to pump. I didn’t have a spectra, but quite frankly, I wouldn’t worry about your neighbor. It’ll be quieter than being on the phone, which I’m guessing you don’t think twice about.

      Our office set-up with glass and windows sounds very familiar to yours. I was the last associate in my office to regularly use the dedicated pumping room. Around that time, we had a new practice group join us from another firm, including a couple younger female partners who were still having children. They had the ability to pump in their offices at their old firm and basically said “he$# no” to not doing it at our office. We did find out that blinds and locks were going to be crazy expensive, so I think they decided to do some thick, temporary curtains (which honestly were probably more effective anyway). My advice would just be not to make a big deal about it or act like the office is moving heaven and earth to accommodate you. Just matter-of-factly note that you’ll need X, Y, or Z, are able to research options if you office manager is swamped, and just get it done. If there is any push back, you can (1) pay for it yourself, or (2) point out that it will literally pay for itself in less than X (5-10 probably) working days compared to the year you’ll be pumping. Alternatively, if you go with curtains, just do it and if anyone asks why, tell them.

      More importantly, you’ll be paving the way for those after you. Pumping is very normalized in my office thanks to some amazing moms who came before me, and I am forever grateful to the culture our office has because of them.

    • Baby wants Milk says:

      I’m in SF and on the shameless side, and I have a desk with a low cubical wall, and I pump at my desk 2-3 times a day, with a big scarf as a cover. I am in the position where I can be semi-public about it and sort of passively promote it a normal practice The other option would be the conference room, but I don’t get any cell coverage there and it’s cold. My closest coworkers know the scarf sign and leave me alone, but a few times a week I will answer a quick question while I’m busy, and if it gets more involved I have to tell people -“come back in 10 min, I can’t get up/use my hands right now”. Most of the time, people seem very oblivious to the fact that I’ve got tubes coming out from the scarf? in 5 months, I have had a few convos b/c the pump and associated sound has attracted occasional attention where people are asking, is it a panting dog? a video game? an oxygen machine? what? which isn’t a problem for me to clear up.

      • Anonymous says:

        Whoa. I am past the pumping stage but you are my new hero. The closest I came to doing that was pumping in an office with 3 high-walled cubes where I had the cube at the end of the room farthest from the door. My 2 office mates were nonplussed about the setup.

        I was relatively shameless (as I think is totally appropriate) about nursing my babies well into toddlerhood wherever, whenever, and with no cover, but something about being hooked up to a machine made me feel more vulnerable. I hated pumping. Anyway, my hero!

    • If facilities won’t put the $$ for blinds and you want something only for the period of time you’re pumping, my office literally taped dark construction paper over the window (it’s like a 6-in wide window next to the door). Depending on how big the window is, you could make your own window covering like that.

      The sound is not loud enough for anyone to notice. I take calls while pumping all the time.

      I would want a lock, though, unless you are confident people will respect a do not disturb sign.

      • Anonanonanon says:

        I’ve always worked for government (which is cheeeaaaaap) so my first thought was that theyll just tape up some butcher paper

    • NewMomAnon says:

      I would look at a folding screen before trying to install blinds or curtains…it’s easier to remove and you could probably sell or re-use it afterward. It also might look nicer.

  6. My office has the same thing. I was the last associate to regularly use the pumping room (which actually was okay). People had used it for years, but then we had some new younger female partners join who were still having children and said no way. They were used to pumping in their offices at their old firm and were totally unwilling to give up the productivity. The shades were going to be expensive, so I think they made do with buying some inexpensive, thick curtains (which may or may not work in your set-up) since it was just going to be temporary. They also didn’t have a lock, but everyone knew the situation, and they put out a sign on their door when you couldn’t enter. My office is laid back and we’re all pretty comfortable with each other. In addition, pumping is very normalized in my office. I really think you should just tell your boss/partners/etc. that you’re unwilling to give up X hours of your day and are researching solutions to accommodate the issue. When you mention that your productivity increase will pay for the accommodations (which can be removed when you’re done) in X days compared to the months you plan to pump, it will be obvious what makes sense. And you’ll be paving the way for others, which is so awesome.

  7. Boston OB-GYN and Fertility rec says:

    Recommendations for Boston ob-gyns and fertility docs? Need a new ob-gyn before my sept annual (current one is meh), and we are on month 5 of TTC and i’m 38, so want to be prepared for next steps.

    • For fertility, you would most likely be referred to IVF New England, which is a consortium with several other practices, including Boston IVF. They have offices all around New England which is really helpful for work and travel. That’s who I used and all my local friends have as well. I went to the Lexington office, which is their main one, for most appointments and loved all the techs there. I really liked their online portal.

    • Brigham and Women’s fertility program was awesome. I recommend Dr. Janis Fox. They have several satellite offices north, south and west of the city as well, so you won’t always need to go the main hospital if you don’t want to, except for IVF retrieval and transfers and weekend bloodwork and ultrasounds.

  8. An 8 year old kid in my family has been diagnosed with a rare cancer. His parents are working with doctors with figure out the type and stage, but chemo for a year will be a part of the treatment. I live across the country, but my mind and heart is with them constantly. I cannot visit with the frequency that I would like (i have two kids of my own), but how can I support them? They have all meals and home help covered. Also, this kid is really into school, esp math and reading. Are there tutoring or home schooling services? Are there state provided support services? I just wish I could pop over every afternoon to cheer him up.

    • mascot says:

      Could you send him regular care packages? Or maybe a subscription box like Kiwi crate or something?

      • anonanon says:

        This is a really good idea – or Little Passports. And another box if there’s another kid.

        • +1 to remembering any siblings! My brother had a terminal illness and it was very hard on me as a kid. I know my parents were doing the best they could but they were (rightfully) consumed with his care sometimes. Any adults reaching out was super appreciated.

    • Meg Murry says:

      If he doesn’t already have one, perhaps he’d like a Kindle E-Reader, and/or Kindle Fire with Audible subscription. My son got his grandma’s hand-me-down Kindle when he was 9 and really likes reading on it, and he also really likes listening to audio books on his tablet.

      Are there other siblings? Could you and other family members perhaps arrange to take the other siblings to do something fun this summer? Or help the grandparents arrange that?

      • Anonanonanon says:

        I really like the idea of an audible subscription or audible credits. My son likes spending credits/gift cards more than us buying him something for some reason. I get regular infusions of medication similar to chemo and audio books are a lot easier, because with IVs in etc it’s hard to navigate a book or e-reader without getting reprimanded for not keeping your elbow straight. Plus with the nausea it’s nice to close your eyes and listen rather than try to read. Also over-the-ear headphones would be great to go with it, the kind that go in your ear make you more nauseous

    • lawsuited says:

      Do everything you can to go and visit at least once during his treatment. My husband had a childhood cancer and his parents remember very fondly every single person who came out to visit them during that time. When there are no words that can really help or comfort, a physical show of support is amazingly powerful.

    • Anonymous says:

      Facetime. If you want to lay out some cash, you and other family members should get this kid an iPad, because if everything goes well, there is going to be a LOT of sitting and waiting. Waiting before appointments, waiting while parents talk to doctors, waiting during infusions, waiting, waiting, waiting.

      (And playing video puzzle games has been shown to reduce pain.!)

      If he feels up to it you could do a book club or some logic puzzle/stories together once a week.

  9. Meg Murry says:

    A family friend has several of these Perplexus balls (there are different sizes and difficultly levels), and I play with them every time we are at their house – they are lots of fun. I’ve considered getting them for my kids, but to be perfectly honest I want it for myself more than for them.

    • Anonymous says:

      Yes! My mom has a couple of these for her classroom and I play with them when she brings them home for the summer. They are mesmerizing. And some of them are really tricky.

  10. I heard from a family member this morning that her family has just recovered from norovirus. I was texting her about dropping off a birthday gift for her son, but now I’d like to swing by the grocery store first and surprise them with some food. It’s mainly for the adults/parents because their preschooler is incredibly picky and they have an infant. I was thinking of Fresh Market’s rotisserie chicken + 2 sides combo and some fruit but am open to other suggestions. It sounds like they’re all feeling better, so I don’t necessarily think they just need soup, but I’m sure they’re exhausted and would probably appreciate a meal.

    • I miss the edit function! The real point of all that is, What should I bring?

      • Double Jogger says:

        Yes. Do that. I would love that. Some cut up fruit plus a rotisserie chicken would be amazing.

      • Anon in NYC says:

        That sounds great! Rotisserie chicken, sides, and fruit sounds super comforting – exactly what I’d want in that situation.

    • That sounds great. And it’s easily put in the fridge for tomorrow if they already have plans for tonight. What a thoughtful friend!

    • Anonymous says:

      That is super thoughtful of you! I’d also bring a store-bought dessert (or maybe one of those Mrs. Smiths frozen pies you can heat up in the oven), but that’s just because I have a sweet tooth!

    • KateMiddletown says:

      Maybe a loaf of bread and some butter, too, since recovered might still mean weak stomach.

      • Anonymous says:

        +1. I’m the kind of person that basically the second I stop vomiting, I will eat anything and everything without negative consequences. But my husband has a much more sensitive stomach and will stick to a BRAT (bananas, rice, applesauce, toast and similar bland things) diet for a day or two after a stomach bug.

  11. sleep issues says:

    I have a 1 year old that cries, sobs, screams nightly before bed for 10 to 15 mins. Is there anything I could do? Does this ever pass? she’s always done this with us, but sleeps with no crying with the nanny for naps, even though she always cries even at naps with us. it’s just horrible and I feel awful about this.

    • Anonymous says:

      I don’t think meltdowns before bed/naptime are that abnormal, and yes of course, she’ll grow out of it! You don’t hear of an 8 year old doing this before bed do you? DD is 14 months and is pretty whiney before bed and almost always cries/screams when I do the last diaper change and put her in pajamas. It’s definitely not enjoyable but I try to just block it out.

      • blueridge29 says:

        My 3 year old dd is/was like this and has just started to go down for naps & bedtime without 10 minutes of screaming. She is pretty high strung and it is hard for her to unwind. Letting her pick a toy or book to take to bed with her has helped, but this was a recent development. It made me feel like a terrible mother, but once I realized that even if I hold her before bed all I am doing is delaying her crying spell I just learned to ignore her. Good luck!

    • eh..with my first that would have been concerning as she went to sleep like an angel every night. She started sleeping in a real bed at 18 months because she out of nowhere started fussing when put to bed @ 18 months and slept there nicely ever since (she’s almost 5).

      My second is almost 2 and has ALWAYS raged to sleep. She’s in her crib and will likely be there until she is 13 for this specific reason. We’ve *just* (last week) gotten to the point where if we leave a nightlight on a timer, she MIGHT consider reading books for 5-10 min and muttering vs full out screaming.

      I felt like a bad mom for a while until I realized my attempts to soothe her just kept her up longer. It is what it is.

  12. Queen bed vs king bed says:

    DH and I are ready to replace our mattress. It is a queen size in a good quality bed frame with matching dresser. I enjoy spreading out in king size beds when we stay at hotels (but I may be conflating the general enjoyment of staying at a hotel with the bed) and have had a vague plan to size up when it was time to replace the mattress. Now that I start looking into it seriously, I am have second thoughts. Not only is the king size mattress 40% more, but we would need all new bedding and a new bed frame. And I can see how getting a new bed frame could lead into getting an entire new bedroom set.

    We have the money and space to spare (but are frugal and don’t want to spend money without corresponding benefit). I don’t foresee us moving for a long time. We are average size and dont have kids or dogs sleeping with us. What woukd you do? Are you team queen bed or team king bed?

    • KateMiddletown says:

      KING! If you can stand the spongy mattresses, we found ours on amazon- similar to casper, etc. but sub $700. I still love my traditional spring mattress, which lives in our guest room, but I would never go back to smaller shared bed.

      • KateMiddletown says:

        and for reference, we have it on a box spring (Big Lots) and cheap frame, and we’ve toyed with the idea of a headboard but we have a bunch of oversized pillows and a large painting above the bed, so it does the job.

    • It is worth it. I am very frugal but bedding is one area that I am willing to spend money. We bought a new bed frame and mattress last year (we previously had a king so didn’t need to buy new bedding). We bought a frame that matched our current furniture, so didn’t need to buy a whole new set. We went with a mid-range bed frame, but did drop some money on a Tempur Pedic mattress. It has been a year and we both agree it was worth every penny.

    • Anonymous says:

      King. But both DH and I are tall. We love the Ikea mattresses – so affordable, and no qualms about replacing it every 15ish months.

    • We are team king, but my husband is very large (4XLT, 6’0″) and I am moderately large (14-16, 5’8″). And our toddler co-sleeps. My husband bought a new mattress when we were dating. It was early in the relationship, he had a small double! not even a full! bed, plenty of disposable income and I convinced him to upgrade to a king as even his feet were hanging off the edge sleeping diagonally solo. He asked if I wanted to go shopping with him and I (stupidly) told him no, mattresses are long-term investments and I didn’t want to influence his decision given how early in the relationship we were. He went and bought a moderately soft tempurpedic. Needless to say, if I could do it over, I would have gone with and maybe convinced him to buy something firmer (even tempurpedic) since it is now our bed. But I love that he can toss and turn and I don’t feel the mattress move an inch even if I wish the mattress were firmer. We just have the bedframe they sell with the tempurpedic, no headboard, etc. It looked funny to me the first year to not have a headboard, not have a matching bedroom set, etc. but everything else in the room is medium-tone wood and so it just works for us. I guess I got used to it and have other places I’d rather spend my money (like the 8! pillows we have that effectively make a headboard).

    • Anonymous says:

      Team Queen. But DH and I are small. I also enjoy kings in hotels, but I definitely think it’s due to being in a hotel. And even if it isn’t, I like having that extra joy when I leave my house so I wouldn’t want that to be my new normal. (Note: This is also my reframe of living somewhere in the boondocks with no good restaurants – when I leave town, I REALLY appreciate a good meal in a way that I didn’t when I had access to them all the time.)

      Plus it does definitely sound like this purchase would lead you to a much bigger update than just a mattress, and is that really what you want do? Are there other projects you might want to spend your $ and time on instead?

      You didn’t ask about this, but I would also look into latex foam mattresses – the traditional ones are horribly toxic – full of nasty chemicals that are meant to be protective against fires, but really bad for you. Look for organic cotton and wool surrounding the latex. This might require a new frame (no box spring), but all your sheets and such would still fit.

    • Anonymous says:

      I’m definitely Team King. A good bed frame should basically last a lifetime and a mattress should last 10 years, so I think the investment is worth it. We have kings in both our master and guest bedroom and people who come to stay always comment on how nice it is to sleep in a king bed.

    • Anonanonanon says:


    • mascot says:

      We are team king. We recently replaced our traditional inner spring with a Leesa mattress and the price difference between queen and king was about $200. We like the option of spreading out, as do the two dogs that sleep with us.

    • anne-on says:

      OMG KING! 100% all the way, all day every day. I’d also highly highly recommend a natural latex mattress. They are surprisingly inexpensive for the quality and I loved being able to customize the firmness and then add a mattress topper. The place we used is below – going to a physical showroom also helped us decide.

    • We had a queen and bought a king when we moved into our “forever” home. We are both tall, and the difference is real. You say you don’t have kids in bed with you…I would follow that up asking how old your kids are. We didn’t have kids in bed with us until our preschool started to have nightmares and crawled into bed with us 1x/week for about six weeks. And now we have a toddler that wakes up at 5:30am and will sometimes consider being quiet from 5:30-6am if we let her snuggle down in our bed. :)

      That aside- the only real downside to the king that I’ve found is that, at least with the way we sleep, it functions so much more like 2 separate beds. DH and I can go all night without (unintentionally) touching each other, each wrapping up in our own covers. Unfortunately…the covers aren’t big enough for this, so we’ve ended up with a giant pile of blankets that we each burrow into. That may or may not work for you, but when we shared a queen bed we’d be within arms reach of each other and definitely under the same blanket. But I’m team king all the way.

  13. KateMiddletown says:

    ISO comfortable pregnancy flats that accommodate getting-wider feet and don’t look stupid with a dress. I have a few after-work events coming up where I’ll need to wear a jacket and need something comfortable for standing for ~1-2 hours (after a day’s work. Ugh.) Price range cheaper than Rothy’s please.

    • Leatty says:

      Sam Edelman Felicia flats. They are soo soft and comfortable, but don’t look mumsy. Nordstrom has them in a lot of colors, and they are only $100. The leather is soft enough that it will stretch to accommodate growing feet, and they are cushioned enough that your feet won’t complain unnecessarily about standing for long periods of time.

    • Anonymous says:

      I have some very comfortable Target d’orsay flats. The reason my feet got wider in pregnancy was that my arch collapsed and the d’orsay style is good for that since it has the cutout in the middle.

    • I lived in some llbean ballet flats I had (which appear to no longer be made) and lands end ballet flats. Soft leather (not patent) was my friend. Also spent a lot of time in sofft wedge sandals for dressier events, but not sure how they do with widening.

    • Anonanonanon says:

      I agree with those that recommend soft leather as the way to go. I wore my tieks throughout my pregnancy (and I had major swelling at the end) but they were already broken in prior to the pregnancy. I’m not sure I’d recommend a brand new pair since they do have a break in period, but I agree soft leather is the way to go.

    • Moving says:

      I lived in Dr. Scholl’s Kimber flats (check out Zappos) starting in my third trimester. Soft and comfy with enough arch support to keep you from hating life too much. They stretched out so far I’ve been thinking of buying new ones now because they don’t fit anymore.

    • Anonymous says:

      May not be dressy enough depending on your location/event, but all my Rockport Cobb Hill shoes have continued to be amazingly comfortable at 27 weeks (and I am someone who gets foot problems in pregnancy and postpartum). Given said foot problems and my pnw location they’re plenty dressy for me.

  14. Matchings says:

    FYI, Target is now selling matching/coordinating family ensembles, including matching bathing suits for those of us who crave opportunities to immortalize our post-parenthood beach bodies with professional photo shoots. Snark aside, I think this is a brilliant move by Target.

    • I was really prepared to hate this, but I think it’s really cute and brilliant. Our approach to picture outfits is to wake up, figure out what’s clean, and try to pull something together where we don’t clash. The first two years it worked, then last year we missed the mark. (It probably didn’t help that DH and I had worn our favorite items of clothing the first two years. We don’t buy clothes very often.)

      • Anonymous says:

        I’m just impressed you’ve done pictures annually! I can’t actually picture myself wearing any of the Target items but I like the concept.

    • Anonymous says:

      I like the concept but I don’t think the actual outfits are that cute.

  15. Wow that is a brilliant plan from Target. I hope they keep it going for our family photos in the fall.

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