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Updated: Nov 1, 2018 43 Comments · by

Finally Friday: Josie Flat

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Munro Josie FlatMunro is one of those brands that I hear a lot about as being super comfortable and well made — and this Josie flat looks really stylish as well. I love the teeny tiny wedge heel (1.25″ high), and the three colors it comes in. As always, a sale never hurts: the shoe was $184, but is now marked to $99 — available in five widths, sizes 4.5-11.5. Munro Josie Flat (L-2)

Sales of note for 12.5.23…

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Comments

  1. RDC says

    Ladies, we just found out our dog has a very aggressive form of cancer (prognosis: 1-3 months). She is young and otherwise healthy and this is a complete shock. I could really use some internet hugs today. Any advice on holding it together at work, or dealing with this more generally?

  2. doulas says

    Any thoughts on doulas and childbirth classes? Or recommendations in the DC area? Delivering at GW with MFA.

    • Maddie Ross says

      I’m kind of an oddball in that I didn’t do the childbirth or b-feeding classes, and you know what – it totally was worked for me. I read a lot from several different sources and basically was ok with the idea of handing myself over to the process and the doctors. I know everyone has different opinions, and know that this decision is actually becoming rarer in the days of “informed birthing”, etc., but I just knew that this was what would work for me and my personality. Along these lines, I think you have to do what works for you and your personality.

      • sfg says

        I didn’t do these, either. I informed myself about my options by reading on my own and talking to my doctor. For me, it was good not to have expectations about things going a certain way because my birth experience was not what I expected! I did take a newborn care class, but I almost think we learned more from the nurses in the hospital.

      • Maddie Ross says

        I should add, my hospital has a mandatory newborn care class before discharge, so I did take that class with my husband. And also had several visits with lactation consultants in the hospital and after discharge. For me, those were so much more helpful than the amorphous idea that “this is what you will do.”

    • RDC says

      Yes to having a doula – it was a huge help. We had Abby Cruikshank and highly recommend her.

    • ys says

      I’m with Maddie. I didn’t go to any childbirth classes – I figured I’d learn just enough to specifically worry about certain things that were outside of my control anyway. People have babies every day, I assumed the doctors would know what they were doing. Plus I didn’t want to subject my husband to birth videos – it’s fine and beautiful, etc. etc. when it’s your own wife / kid but pretty traumatic if you’re watching a stranger.

      I did do a breastfeeding class, and while there were nuggets of helpful information, it was nothing I hadn’t already read about on Kelly Mom, and there was a very strong vibe of, “it’s tantamount to child abuse if you don’t breastfeed, and if it doesn’t work for you and your child it’s your fault for not trying hard enough.” So I ended up more annoyed than informed.

      • RDC says

        Heh – on the videos, I actually wanted DH to see them to make sure he was prepared (read: would not pass out) when it came time for the real deal. I actually felt like the class was much more useful for him – every session, he’d look at me and say, did YOU know that? Well, yes, I had some idea how things worked. It was good for him to be prepared as I think he would have been pretty freaked out otherwise.

        • anon says

          Agree – we took the hospital-offered childbirth class together (Sibley), and I didn’t think there was anything new that I hadn’t already read. The natural childbirth techniques taught were not useful for me. And sitting in a chair for a full day was not exactly comfortable at 36 weeks. My spouse, though, really preferred to learn from a class rather than from books, and it was great to have him know what was going on during the actual birth.

    • Chronic Overachiever says

      I took a childbirth class and felt that it was a waste of time. I learned all that was said in the books I read prior to attending the class.

      I did not take a breastfeeding class, but received a lot of help from lactation consultants while I was in the hospital after my c-section. In hindsight, I wish I would have spent money on a breastfeeding class and not a childbirth class.

      • BoysBoysBoys says

        Same. I read a lot about breastfeeding, but reading did not really teach me technique. My first was a bit of a barracuda, and I did not have the proper latch down.

      • Due in December says

        Regarding reading about childbirth…does anyone have books/sections of books they recommend for this discussion?

        • quailison says

          It’s super crunchy in a lot of ways, but if you ignore the more wackadoo parts I really liked the Ina May Gaskin books for a positive but mostly realistic depiction of childbirth. That and watching youtube clips of birth were very helpful. Other books didn’t go into enough detail or were too clinical to be useful in the moment.

          In the end, I was glad the crunchy stuff sort of stuck – thinking about being “open” and visualization ended up helping me cope with labor and I am NOT normally that sort of person at all. But contractions are definitely painful and not “waves of pressure” or whatever she says!

        • Carrie M says

          I agree on Ina May. I also really liked Natural Hospital Birth: The Best of Both Worlds by Cynthia Gabriel. I actually referred to it during early labor when I needed a quick reminder of some of the pain management techniques. I read the whole book, and I flagged certain chapters / sections for my husband to read.

    • KJ says

      I used By Your Side Birth Doulas and did Susan Messina’s child birth class and was very happy with both. The classes were especially useful for my husband. I probably could have gotten most of the information from books, but it was very valuable for us to do the class together to get us on the same page about various things and spark discussions.

      • Spirograph says

        I used By Your Side for my first, and was also very happy with them. My labor was fast and the doula didn’t get to the hospital until a minute or two before I delivered, but she was better rested and less overwhelmed than my husband and I were, so it was still nice to have her there in the immediate aftermath (I didn’t find the L&D nurses terribly helpful). I also appreciated having the doula to talk to on the phone in the middle of the night, since my doctor pretty much blew me off. I didn’t have a doula for my second, and I wish I had, but that’s a story for another day. Like Meg Murry says below, everything is just better with a second support person.

        We took a childbirth and a “baby 101” class at Holy Cross. Neither my husband nor I had been around babies much, so we both liked babies 101. It didn’t teach anything that we wouldn’t have figured out on our own, but hit helped us feel a little more prepared. We both could have done without the childbirth class. Not that it was a bad class, it just wasn’t anything I hadn’t learned from a book. My husband isn’t a reader and didn’t know anything about childbirth, but he was really not a fan of the class environment — it probably would have been better to plop him on the couch and make him watch a video at home.

    • Meg Murry says

      Not in your area, but I thought in some ways my childbirth class was moderately helpful, since my doctor wasn’t overly so (his suggestion was “the hospital has a good childbirth class, take that and then come back to ask me any questions you have”) since I had no clue what was going on. Before the class, I had a vague clue what an epidural was, and that there would be contractions, but that was about it – I knew nothing about the specifics of childbirth, inductions, etc other than what I had skimmed in “what to expect” – and I suspect my husband knew even less. But they left out things that seemed kind of important to me (hello, you had me practice breathing for like 2 hours, and you didn’t mention the part about holding my breath during pushing? um, why did you bother with this section of class? and other things like that).

      Overall I think the class was good for my husband, since he also didn’t know much about childbirth – and in the end it reached the point where I was pretty drugged up so he had to make some fast decisions for me.

      We didn’t have a doula, and I didn’t get what the deal with them was or why someone would want one while I was pregnant. While I was in labor, my mom came to the hospital and wound up staying, and then I understood – because it helps to have at least one person in the room who has a clue what is going on! As mentioned above, my husband had to make decisions for me a few times, and he told me he appreciated having my mother there to help make the decision. She also was able to do things like take run interference with the rest of the family – taking phone calls for us in the hallway and keeping my father, sister and MIL up to date so my husband could stay in the room with me, or staying with me when things were slow (I was induced, so we were there a loooong time with some very slow periods, and I was stuck in bed) so he could get some coffee, use the bathroom or just take a walk.

      So whether you use a doula or another family member, I recommend a second support person who has a clue what is going on with childbirth – often the L&D nurses are great, but they have multiple patients so they aren’t with you the whole time, and sometimes your support person needs some support/backup.

    • Anonymous says

      Delivering with GW midwives, so doula and classes are mandatory for me. We’re taking a class with Ursula Sukinik (Birth You Desire), came highly recommended from another woman who birthed with the midwives. I don’t think her class is limited to natural births. We are also taking a free class about natural birth at GW, but sounds like that doesn’t apply to you. Still working on the doula…

    • TBK says

      Agree with everyone who said they didn’t really need the classes. I think if you’re gung ho natural all the way, then sure I see how they’re useful. But because I was on bed rest for so long, I wasn’t able to go to any classes. On the day I showed up to be induced, I said to the L&D nurses “I didn’t take any classes. I don’t know what I’m supposed to do.” They said “oh don’t worry — you have us and we know plenty! We’re here to take care of you!” And they were right. (Not totally on topic, but if you aren’t dead set on natural, be sure to find out how soon you should request an epidural. I loved loved loved the epidural. Seriously. I wanted to give its inventor a Nobel prize. But it took about 45 min-1hr between my husband going to the nurse’s station to say I wanted one and the medicine actually working because they had to page an anesthesiologist and then he had to be available and then he had to come to our wing then do the actual procedure then the drugs had to make their way into my body.)

      • DC Mom says

        I took every class I could find! It was my way to feel like I was getting prepared and it helped my husband get involved. I delivered at WHC with the midwives.
        For birth class — I really enjoyed Hypno Birthing – it sounds crazy, but I learned how to truly relax (useful skill at any time) and to trust my body. I also took the baby basics class at WHC, most of the baby care stuff was obvious, but infant CPR part was useful, and they had a lot of hospital specific info that was helpful.
        Breastfeeding — Breastfeeding Center on K St is pretty great. I learned lots of different techniques/holding positions at their basics class, but that was about it. When I needed more specific help postpartum, they sent a lactation consultant to my house.
        Good luck!

    • quailison says

      Not in your area but will chime in with class/doula experience:

      – Childbirth class was very helpful for husband, but not for me. Like others said, it was nothing I hadn’t read or watched on youtube, but for husband (who never got around to watching the youtube clips I sent for this purpose…) it definitely made him feel better and more prepared to be a good birth partner.

      – Did not take breastfeeding class prior to birth. Don’t think it would have been at all helpful w/o the baby there. I did not have an easy time breastfeeding, but I don’t think a class before would have helped me diagnose why or how to fix it. Lactation consultants were SO important and in addition I attended a support group/class at the hospital 3x week until BFing was well established.

      -Doula: We hired a doula for the birth. Ended up having a fast labor and so doula did not make it to my house in time for the usual “labor support” – but without her we would not have gone to the hospital in time , so I figured we paid to avoid an inadvertent home birth. Definitely money well spent. Basically, she knew what the stages of labor were and neither me nor my husband had any clue…turned out I was pushing. Oh well.

    • JEB says

      I didn’t take any child birth classes, but I took prenatal yoga at Yoga Birth and Beyond in Alexandria, which is more of a combo class. It’s taught by an experienced doula (Sharon Stevenson), and the first part of each class is an educational component. I really enjoyed it because it was just enough to get an idea of what to expect. I planned to get an epidural, so I wasn’t interested in a very detailed course, hynobirthing, etc. Getting an overview, basic breathing techniques, etc. was perfect for me. The class was small and included the same women each week, so it was a good chance to get to know other pregnant ladies in the area and to do a little (very light) yoga. And while it was fairly focused on strategies for an un-medicated birth, I never felt any judgment for my own plan to get an epidural. I’d highly recommend it!

      Other than that, I took breastfeeding and baby care at Inova hospital. They were fine…helpful but nothing special.

      • Spirograph says

        I had a similarly great experience with prenatal yoga at Willow Street Yoga in Takoma and Silver Spring. Also taught by a doula, also with educational components. I think the best part was that it was a safe place to talk/complain/ask about pregnancy stuff without fear that your non-pregnant friend is inwardly rolling her eyes at you because she is just so sick of the topic.

    • Carrie M says

      Ugh I wrote a long response that got eaten. Sorry this is bit more curt.

      We used Tara Voigt at Your Body Your Birth as our doula. She was great. I ended up in long back labor, and I was very happy to have 2 support people who could trade off applying counter pressure. My husband liked having a knowledgeable sounding board in the room (in addition to our nurses, who were great) and someone to step in for him so he could take a nap or get a soda.

      I liked going on a hospital tour, which was done in conjunction with a childbirthing class at our hospital. For me, the childbirthing class didn’t give me any new information except for the specific hospital’s policies. But it was really eye-opening for my husband – he hadn’t read any books, and the class was the first time he really thought about what would happen at the hospital. So I was glad we did the class for HIM. Plus, it made him realize how helpful it would be to have a doula there.

      If you are thinking about nursing, I highly recommend the BFing 101 class at Virginia Hospital Center in Arlington (not far from the Ballston Metro stop). It’s taught by an LC and nurse, Susan Howard. I hired her as an LC to come to my house after we brought kiddo home from the NICU. She was fabulous and practical and supportive and calming – everything you want in someone all up in your space when you feel like crap. Her class is great – lots of practical tips that even an exhausted first-time mom can remember, and a panel of new parents who offer their own advice from inside the trenches. The dads are hilarious. I did a class at the BFing Center on K St that was only mildly helpful, but I will highly recommend the store there. They have everything you could need or want, and I think they still rent hospital grade pumps if you ended up needing one.

      Good luck!!

  3. Jen says

    Our daughter is ~20 months and for the first time is developing separation anxiety. We just moved, and she’s got a much different childcare arrangement (was Daycare A 4 days/week, home with me on Mondays). Now she’s Daycare B T, Thurs, Friday and babysitter Monday/Wednesday (daycare doesn’t have availability yet). She did great for the first few weeks in the new house, but now daycare drop-offs are just awful. She gets nervous halfway to the classroom because IT MEANS MOM WILL LEAVE. She has a full on meltdown that starts wtih a lip tremble, escalates to a death grip on my leg, and finishes with her teachers having to PRY her off me and try to comfort her for 15-20 minutes every morning. We have tried short goodbyes, long goodbyes, the works…

    At home, she’s been a fantastic sleeper since she was born. She’s in an adult bed and has been in one for about a month. Just this week, she screams bloody murder and BOLTS out of bed and out the door whenever the last parent in the room says good night. She’s not dodging bed time, she wants one of us in there with her. She instantly puts her head on the pillow and falls asleep within 10 minutes (no playing, talking, begging for stories–nothing) if someone is in the room with her. We are discovering that “in the room” can be “sitting on the floor across the room”– somone just needs to be there. If we don’t do this, she stays up for HOURS (normally asleep no later than 8:15, and both nights we tried to “hold firm,” and keep tucking her back in and leaving, she was up until 11pm when we finally gave up and stayed in the room. fell immediately asleep.)

    Advice? I sthis something we just muddle through (placate her at night, keep on keeping on at daycare until it passes)? Should we be doing things differently? I am 100% holding firm on no-toddler-in-mommy’s bed, and we very rarely if ever camp out in her room (we did this a few times about 6 months ago when she had a nasty chest cold and needed middle of the night nebulizing)–and if we do it’s on the floor, not in her bed.

    • Maddie Ross says

      I don’t have anything hugely helpful for the nighttime issues, but I will note that we moved our daughter (both house and daycare) around the same age and noticed similar issues. With nighttime, our LO was still in a crib, so we basically ended up having to do CIO. I don’t know that this would work as well in a bed though. If it truly was a 10 minute or less thing to sit with her, could you just make that part of the bedtime routine for a bit? Moving definitely can create havoc on little ones.

      With daycare, I think the best thing is just to keep on keeping on. The teachers are used to this sort of thing and I’ve noticed that if I leave the room and peek in 30 seconds later, usually she’s cheered up and playing. Unless she cries the entire day, I think I would just be gentle, but firm, that mommy is leaving and hand her over to her teacher with a kiss. If possible, you could also try having dad do drop-off for a bit, though we found that our LO freaked out just as much with him (which made him feel good).

      • Jen says

        In her old daycare, I basically got “see ya!” and was once SHOVED OUT THE DOOR so she could get to a toy. SO to go from that to full out terror is just hard. If it were just a 30 second freak-out, I’d feel better. But they told me on Friday of last week and earlier this week she didn’t settle down for 20+ minutes. That’s not normal (I mean…it’s normal for toddlers who have separation issues…but not for our typically chill daughter who has been going to this daycare without issue for 3+ weeks now).

    • BoysBoysBoys says

      Can you just hang out in her room for 10 minutes for now at bedtime? I don’t see this as a huge issue, really. My older son has always had a bit more separation anxiety, and the parent putting him to bed usually hangs out anywhere from an extra minute to an extra 10 minutes at bedime, depending on what’s going on with him. ETA – like you, we finish the bedtime routine, put him in bed, then sit in his rocker in a dark room (with him in bed). He is hardly ever asleep when we leave the room after hanging out for a few extra minutes.

      If it really bothers you, I’d spend three days waiting until she falls asleep, so it soothes some of her immediate anxiety about a parent bolting, which she seems to need right now, then start the errand excuse. Spend three minutes rocking in the dark room after her bedtime routine, then say – “Mommy has to go the bathroom, BRB!” then, let her hear you flush and everything, and – most importantly – come right back. The idea being that she knows you may leave, but that you’ll come back. The next night, pick a longer errand – Mommy needs to go throw some clothing in the dryer, BRB! And, come back, even just for a minute or whatever. After a while, you can put her down, spend an extra minute in her room, then bolt. She’ll feel better about knowing that just b/c mommy/daddy isn’t in the room, they will always come right back.

      I put this in the category of harmless. You aren’t bringing her to bed in the middle of the night, she’s not waking up for hours at night, she just needs a little extra support right now. I feel like I learned an important lesson with my first – sleeping doesn’t improve in a linear fashion. Don’t think of this little crutch as dooming you to staying in her room for hours at night until college unless you nip it in the bud immediately, just think of it as a short-term boost to help her confidence and security. As she feels more secure, she’ll need less hand-holding at night. I don’t see this as a CIO situation – she clearly knows how to go to sleep, which is what CIO fixes, she just needs some extra parent-security right now. I know when I start a new job, I feel anxiety at night, and need some extra support/love/wine before bed as well.

      And, honestly, as she feels a little more confident and secure at night, I bet that will translate to better departures during the day.

      • Meg Murry says

        I agree that sitting with her for 10 minutes seems like a reasonable compromise. After a few days, you could also move to sitting just outside her door, if the “be right back” part doesn’t work. I agree that a 10 minute crutch that you can wean her off of later isn’t that onerous, it’s not setting her up for sleep failure for life. I’d highly recommend you alternate whether you or Daddy stay in the room, so she doesn’t start to depend on just one of you and flips out when the other does bedtime.

        How is she at naptime on the weekends? Does she require your presence then, or is she ok? Or is this new as of this week so you don’t know yet?

        Does she have a lovey (stuffed animal, blankie, etc)? My kids both did, and it was about this age when they started to lean on them hard. Or does daycare have stuffed animals? When one of my kids would flip out, the teachers would take them over to pick out a stuffed animal to hug, which sometimes helped (or at least distracted). We started priming them in the daytime with them (oh, you fell down and bumped your head? That’s so sad, lets get doggy and give him some hugs, there, doesn’t that make you feel better?) so that they learned to get comfort from something other than just Mommy and Daddy, and loveys/blankies can go with them to daycare.

        Even in a daycare my kids have been going to their whole lives, there are rough dropoff days, especially after classroom changes or when routines change like after long weekends. Can you talk to the teacher about a strategy – maybe call or email her so you aren’t doing it during dropoff? Most teachers are used to this and learn to deal with sad kids and may have a strategy for you (one hug, one kiss and then mom leaves, or hugs and then wave to mommy out the window, etc). When one of my kids was going through a really rough patch with drop-offs, the only thing that really helped was to time them such that we were dropping off just as breakfast was going on the table – apparently food was enough to distract him, when nothing else was.

        • BoysBoysBoys says

          Good points about a comfort object at school – our school also has parents send a “Who Loves Me” page. It was filled with pictures of all his favorite people (mom, dad, grandma, best friends, etc.). The teachers kept them in a special place, and then the kids can grab them whenever they need comfort. It helps to keep them either in a plastic sleeve or laminate the page.

    • POSITA says

      If it makes you feel any better, my 21 month old is having major separation anxiety and nothing at all has changed in her life. She won’t let us leave the room until she is asleep (we sit on the floor and watch her fall asleep). She has also started screaming for us in the middle of the night. My husband and I have each spent two nights sleeping on the floor in her room this week because otherwise she keeps waking up panicked. We all get more sleep if we just stay. Even the nanny has had to hang out in her room for naps several times this week for her to nap. She opens her eyes every 10 minutes or so just to make sure the nanny is still there. I really think it’s just a phase and my good-sleeping child will return in a few weeks.

      As another point of comparison, the other child in our nannyshare who is about the same age has also had major separation anxiety this week. He basically spent an entire day in a tizzy looking for his mom and chanting “mommy” endlessly. Nothing had changed in his lift either–we all think its a phase.

    • NewMomAnon says

      You’ve gotten some good bedtime advice, so I’ll chime in on daycare – for a few days at pickup, can you arrive 20 minutes early and just hang out on the floor while she plays? I did that with my daughter when she transitioned (badly) to a new classroom, and it was really helpful.

      But it does sound like a phase, so time and extra TLC are probably the way to go. Good luck.

    • hoola hoopa says

      My solution to the daycare drop-off anxiety is to have Dad do drop off. With our kids, it’s never been so emotional to say good bye to Daddy, and he’s in and out in 5 minutes.

  4. Daycare frustration says

    Talk me down, ladies. My husband is out of town for work this week, and I took the day off, so neither of us was in the office earlier today when daycare called to tell us that 2-year-old “bumped his head while playing but is fine. It’s our policy to inform parents immediately of any head injury, no matter how minor,” and I got a snarky e-mail about it instead. When they got through to my husband via cell phone, apparently they chastised him that we hadn’t informed daycare he will be traveling this week, and that our emergency contact information did not enable them to reach us immediately. I slept through my cell phone ringing because I am exhausted from dealing with a petulant 2 year old all week who won’t sleep because he misses daddy. I don’t care whether my son bumped his head and is fine, tell me when I pick him up. I am super annoyed at the expectation that someone should be instantly available by phone, and that I have to inform daycare in writing/e-mail about my household logistics. If it’s an emergency, call 911, if it’s not, the half hour delay is not a big deal. If it’s an FYI and you don’t need me to actually do anything, why are you even bothering me? I know they’re just doing their job and probably following state regulations, but my well of patience is dry and I’m going to snap at someone if they scold me about this when I pick my son up this afternoon.
    /end rant

    • Carrie M says

      That’s so annoying. If it’s just an FYI call, it shouldn’t matter whether they leave a voicemail or talk to you live.

      Can I also just say, I received two FYI calls this week – both that she wasn’t feeling well, but didn’t have a real fever requiring me to pick her up. Both times I wanted to respond: So, are you just calling to tell me she’s not feeling well so I can feel like an even more terrible mother that I sent her to daycare in the first place and won’t come get her for several hours?

      I loathe FYI calls.

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