CorporetteMoms

Updated: Oct 27, 2022 123 Comments · by

Make My Life Easier Thursday: Mulberry Silk Pillowcase

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White silk pillow case

I’ve slept with a silk pillowcase like this one for years, and I swear my hair looks better in the morning than without it.

This mulberry silk pillowcase from Brooklinen similarly protects your hair and skin from friction while you slumber. Silk is cool to the touch but is also breathable and insulating — perfect for year-round use. It’s also easy to care for — this luxurious pillowcase is machine washable.

This silk pillowcase is on sale for $50.15 for a standard size and $58.65 for a king. It currently comes in four essential colors as well as five limited edition ones.

Sales of note for 9.10.24

(See all of the latest workwear sales at Corporette!)

Kid/Family Sales

  • Carter’s – Birthday sale, 40-50% off & extra 20% off select styles
  • Hanna Andersson – Up to 50% off all baby; up to 40% off all Halloween
  • J.Crew Crewcuts – Extra 30% off sale styles
  • Old Navy – 40% off everything
  • Target – BOGO 25% off select haircare, up to 25% off floor care items; up to 30% off indoor furniture up to 20% off TVs

About Ann

Ann is a working mom, a longtime reader of Corporette and CorporetteMoms, and has been writing our morning fashion advice for working moms since November 2020! She has a daughter (born winter 2014) and a son (born fall 2019) and is a public interest lawyer in Washington, D.C.

Comments

  1. Anonymous says

    Someone please assure me the Zombies 3 soundtrack will eventually leave my brain. Please.

    • anon says

      I bought the Zombies 2 soundtrack when it was on sale on iTunes sometime back. So far I haven’t bought the Zombies 3 soundtrack, but I might have to soon, as my girls have requested the 2 soundtrack on repeat in the car for weeks… I admit some of the songs are catchy, but we might need to mix it up soon.

  2. HSAL says

    Ideas for a 7 year old girl who has everything? $50-$75 range, but flexible for something great. Plays with Barbies sometimes (has a dollhouse) but not otherwise into dolls. Likes reading, Bluey, My Little Pony, and pretending to be a cat.

    • Anon says

      The Bluey house and some matching figurines have provided hours of independent play and play with friends for my 5 year old.

      • HSAL says

        It’s so weird, one of my younger kids has the house and figurines but they just don’t play with it much!

    • AwayEmily says

      Art stuff! Subscription to Pipsticks, a cool craft set, etc. Maybe a little under budget but you could bundle. I feel like art stuff doesn’t always have the immediate “wow” factor but it ends up being a real workhorse.

    • Anonymous says

      Kitch from Claire’s + a target gift card.

      Books if you are an auntie type. A squishmellow (the bigger the better) of you want a “thing.”

      • Anne-on says

        This. A small ‘thing’ – plush, books, stickers/trading card, art supplies plus a gift card to go shop on her own. Ask mom for a current favorite store, Target is the easiest but if there is a local toy store/art store/clothing place that would be great.

    • Boston Legal Eagle says

      Is she into chapter books? Or, if she’s interested in starting Harry Potter with a parent, we have the illustrated hardcover version of the first book, and our 6 year old enjoys hearing us read that. That’s a nice special book.

    • Anonymous says

      I like a gift card for this. My just turned seven year old would be so thrilled to get to go and pick out some stuff from Target or Claire’s. Or even an outfit of her own choosing.

    • HSAL says

      Thanks for the ideas! I’m the mom and this will be a Santa gift, so no gift card. She just got a ton of art supplies and craft kits for her birthday, she’s already getting three different book series (serieses? seresi?) for Christmas, and we have the Bluey house but for some reason they don’t play with it much. But you’ve all reinforced that I’m not crazy for not being able to think of something. Her younger siblings are each getting a play set (Scooby Doo and Spidey), winter hats, and books from Santa. I have her books and hat, but I need a toy, which I should have specified before. Maybe a Barbie van would be a similar vein? Doesn’t need to exactly match up but I definitely want it to be something fun.

        • HSAL says

          She has the Target version and just doesn’t care about it. Which, I’ll take that win!

      • Anon says

        i just went to the Target site and typed in My LIttle Pony and there is something called “My Little Pony Mini World Magic Compact Creation Zephyr Heights Playset” but it is like $20, there is also a My Little Pony Toys: Musical Mane Melody Doll Playset, but then you might need to get earplugs from Santa. Does she like legos, there is a Lego Pet Friends Pet Adoption Cafe set? or this might be out there, but does she have a cat costume, and you could get a basket of actual cat toys? i also have a daughter who likes pretending to be a cat. There is an Our Generation Cat Pet Plush Care Accessory Set and a Our Generation Plush Pet Kitten Accessory Set and a whole bunch of other pet related sets. There is a Barbie pet boutique and if she doesn’t already have pets, you could get some mini cats to go with it.

        • HSAL says

          Ooh, the OG cat stuff could work. And she did say she wants yarn to play with, because kids are so weird. Thanks!

          • Anon says

            she might be too old for this, but you could also look up MindWare Dig it Up Discoveries Cats. It is basically yarn balls with cats inside. i agree – kids are strange

      • Anon says

        My daughter is the same age with similar interests (just asked to get rid of her dollhouse for more room) and the only thing (besides stuffies) that she likes is legos. We have regular and friends sets. She also plays video games with her dad and her stepdad and loves the Mario Lego sets. Her “big” Christmas gift this year is going to be the princess peach Mario Lego set, one expansion pack, and one “outfit” lol. She also loves pusheen everything, in case that’s helpful — it’s like her version of hello kitty.

    • Anon says

      fuji instax camera? Film ends up being a cost but DD has taken some really cool pictures. fitbits are also popular at that age here. also rollerblades.

      • Anon says

        Or a digital camera. I gave my 4 year old an old point and shoot digital camera of mine (I wanted to upgrade anyway so it was essentially a zero cost gift) and it has been a big hit on trips.

        Can you ask her what she wants? Maybe my kid is unusually greedy (ha) but she currently has a running list of about 20 things she wants for her birthday and Hanukkah. Some really small (a $3 Spiderman toy), some huge both physically and financially (one of those motorized, ride-on cars).

    • anonJD says

      There’s a great creative magazine for this age range called Kazoo. My 8-year-old loves it. She keeps back issues to study, does the puzzles, makes the crafts. Highly recommend!

  3. Diaper Help! says

    My 6 month old has been blowing out up the back with every #2 lately. He’s been wearing Pampers Pure but clearly they are not working for him. Sizing up didn’t help. (It’s not necessarily a volume thing – it just seems to travel straight up even if there’s not a lot of it!) Would love some advice/experience on the following:

    1. I’m going to try Target brand – we used them a bit when he was tiny and they worked ok and have back elastic. (Pampers don’t.) I got sizes 4 and 5 to try (he’s in size 3-4 pampers and target seemed to run small) – the 4s have back elastic but the 5s don’t? Did I get a dud of a pack or do all target size 5s not have the back elastic? The 4s will work for awhile but if the 5s and up don’t have back elastic I don’t think target will work long term.

    2. Suggestions on other brands to try? I feel like I’ve already tried most of the recommended ones. Wirecutter recommends Target and Walmart house brands and Pampers. (Haven’t tried Walmart yet.) Baby Bargains likes Pampers. Babygearlab likes babyganics and seventh generation. We tried babyganics early on and it seemed to irritate his skin a little. We used and were happy with seventh generation for quite awhile with my older kid, until they changed the formula and they started leaking the polymer absorbent stuff not infrequently. That was in 2020 – maybe it was a temporary supply chain issue? Anyone used seventh generation more recently? We haven’t tried huggies, but everything I read seems to say most other brands have better absorbency, leak protection, etc.

    This got long. If you read this far, please help me help kiddo’s daycare teachers not have to deal with up the back blowouts every single day!

    • AwayEmily says

      It might just be a “wait it out” thing. Mine had earth-shaking blowouts until her solid food intake really took off (around 6.5 months) and she hasn’t had one since.

    • Lydia says

      we switched to huggies because of back blowouts (were using the target brand before) and they helped a lot. I think it’s very kid specific, though, so I would get small packs and try a few different ones… I wouldn’t put too much stock in wirecutter, etc, since so much depends on kid’s specific body shape, etc!

      also, the blowouts did get better after really getting into solids, like AwayEmily says!

    • Anon says

      2 options:

      1. Cloth diaper cover over a disposable diaper to catch the poop
      2. Fold the top of the diaper down and in to create a little poop prevention wall. Sometimes it’s just about stopping the flow.

    • TheElms says

      Huggies has the back elastic and it nearly always stops the up the back explosion that we got every time with Pampers, Target, and seventh generation. This is our second kid as well and for both its been like this.

      • anon says

        +1 for Huggies. I went with the slightly pricier line, but I’m not sure it matters.

    • Anon says

      The only thing that worked for my daughter was using a plastic diaper cover (designed for cloth diapers) over the disposable diaper. It cinched the waist and leg holes so blowouts were much less common and when they occurred they didn’t normally get on clothes. Mine didn’t really take to solid food until 11-12 months so it was an issue her whole first year.

    • NLD in NYC says

      I like Walmart’s brand and feel they work just as well as Pampers. But this too shall pass. Until that time, send an 2nd set of clothes to daycare. Just in case.

    • Anon says

      Another vote for Huggies. Only thing that worked for our blowouts. At around age 1, we moved to the much less expensive Target brand options.

    • Diaper Help OP says

      Thanks for the Huggies votes of confidence – we will try them! I’m a little confused about which version to try – little snugglers, little movers, or snug and dry. Maybe little movers, since they’re supposed to fit/work with a baby on the move and kiddo is already 6 mo? Anyone have experience with which Huggies model is best?

      • TheElms says

        Little snugglers is for chubbier babies (I think), while little movers is better for leaner babies because the cut is a bit more narrow. I’d go with the more coverage option and get little snugglers. No idea what snug and dry is for — we never tried that one (sorry!).

      • Hmmm says

        I think the names just correspond to the size? We liked the Huggies Plus best, which are only available at Costco.

      • Anon says

        Little snugglers have a poop pocket in the back. The Little Movers do not. I think the little movers may be stretchier but I don’t really notice a difference.

      • NYCer says

        We always used Little Movers during the day time, and Overnights at night time.

    • Anonymous says

      This all depends on your kid’s shape. Mine has super sensitive skin, so we were limited to Pampers Pure and Honest. Huggies didn’t irritate her skin, but they were weirdly high-cut on her, so we had a ton of side blowouts instead of up the back blowouts. Honest and Huggies both have the back elastic.

    • Anonymous says

      Huggies are the best for this in my experience. Second best I’ve tried is the Kirkland brand from Costco, which is very similar but runs a little larger.

  4. Anon says

    My oldest has had 2 incidents in the last two weeks at school. Being disruptive in class and just a general turd. I acknowledge that there’s something going on he’s upset about but also…

    I am so frustrated. My parents were very strict and I would have been hit and punished severely for something like this. I know that it’s not the best way to help my kid grow but… It is absolutely triggering for me to feel like a failure as a parent when my child misbehaves. I’ve done a lot of work on this in therapy, but man… I can hear my mother telling me it’s because I’m on my phone or work too much or indulge my kids.

    • Anon says

      you are not a failure as a parent. yesterday my 4 year old got mad and tried to bite my visiting MIL who just arrived yesterday when she was mad. I was so embarrassed, especially since my kids are usually excited to see my MIL. Kids are kids. No kid is perfect, and neither is any adult.

    • Anne-on says

      First, lots of credit for working on this in therapy. My parents also would have screamed/grounded/hit us if we ever had the audacity to be distruptive in class (respect to authority figures was a big focus in our home). Can you try to spend some 1 on 1 time together on an activity and ask about what’s going on? My kid will open up more on a hike/chatting while we’re driving in the car/while playing catch then if we sit down and try to have a serious talk (though bedtime chats sometimes work).
      I’d also try to spend some time identifying things your kids that your kids do which indicate they are open/comfortable with you that you NEVER would have done with your parents. Will they tell you when they break something or need help with something? Will they talk to you about friends/stuff that’s going on in their lives more generally? Will they ask you to help them with homework, snuggle you, or chose to hang out with you? Those are all hallmarks that they know you are in their corner and a safe person. Hugs.

      • Anon says

        Thank you. I’m sitting here just… feeling like a failure and also having this self doubt because I would *never* have done this.

        Also – I am somebody who stayed in a toxic job for way too long and struggles with boundaries because I am both a people pleaser and terrified to make people angry.

    • Boston Legal Eagle says

      Oh I so relate to your feelings. I wasn’t hit or punished, but was a pretty perfectionist type kid who wanted to please my parents by behaving well. I’ve spent years in therapy unpacking that (and should probably still go honestly). It wasn’t even necessarily my parents’ expectations either – it was me and my situation. And it’s absolutely triggering when my kids don’t listen or act out. But we have to keep reminding ourselves that their personalities are not within our control as much as we may want. They are who they are. The relationship we want to build is not a kid who never messes up for fear of being punished, but one who comes to us when there is an issue. And for us to be there for them.

      • Mommadom says

        “The relationship we want to build is not a kid who never messes up for fear of being punished, but one who comes to us when there is an issue. ”

        I feel this too. I was a perfectionist kid and thrived on positive feedback, compliments, etc. I was also terrified of disappointing my parents. Sometimes I catch myself thinking, “This would never have been allowed when I was growing up,” and I feel like I am being too permissive with my son. But I totally identify with this comment, and I try to remind myself that I don’t want my kids to ever feel like my self-worth is tied up in their behavior or accomplishments.

    • Anonymous says

      Please do more therapy! Your parents apparently abused you for being normal. That’s something that takes a lifetime to process. There’s nothing wrong with your child. They aren’t robots. They are not supposed to be perfectly obedient and behaved at all times. The fact that your kid isn’t an abused meek compliant robot is your thrilling impressive absolutely magnificent success as a parent in overcoming your background.

      • Anon says

        Yes, I think I do… and it’s multifaceted. It’s a new school and I can see that he’s a class clown type kid – always been friends with everyone, very bright, we’ve always joked that he has a future in politics, so some of the disruption is just being kind of a joker. So that’s the baseline.

        Add onto it that Dad had to leave town for an extended work trip (think months long trial/on site audit) and you had us primed for it. Well, then the school introduced him to a ‘sensory walk’ that he could do if he was upset… unfortunately, this was… more than he needed? And he thinks it’s really fun? So he wants to go and do that and doesn’t see it as being disruptive? Like… he sees it as a fun thing that he can do and not a ‘behavioral intervention’. FWIW, the teacher was concerned that he would squeeze his eyes shut and clench his fists silently for about 10 seconds if he was upset… to me that’s a MUCH better option than him trying to walk out of the classroom to use this ‘sensory walk’ tool.

        Teacher is great, we have a whole plan, but also… I sometimes wish my kid would just fall in line. I know he’ll be an amazing leader, but… right now I just need him to chill.

      • Anon says

        I wrote out a response and it’s stuck in mod.

        Atypical and there’s something going on… baseline is that he’s a happy class clown type but a couple things just… have it all thrown off. I’m doing what I think I’m supposed to, but also: I would have just been scared into full compliance.

        • EDAnon says

          One thing to remember is that some kids are scared into compliance and that works. And some are scared and don’t comply but end up harming themselves to cope, like abusing drugs or alcohol. Just because you complied and ended up okay doesn’t mean everyone in that situation would have ended up okay.

    • Anonymous says

      Have you talked about the incidents and tried roleplaying alternatives? Sometimes kids struggle with how to react to a situation in the moment. Something as simple as practicing ‘I’m not going to play with you if you are mean’ and walking away can be helpful. Or talking about how sometimes you have to follow the rules at school even when it doesn’t seem fair or fun. We ask what the kids best thing and hardest thing was everyday at that seems to get them talking more than just ‘how was school’. Sometimes the best thing is cheese pizza at lunch and that’s okay. Sometimes the worst thing is not enough time on the swings at lunch and it’s important to validated that those things can be hard when you are little.

      • Anon says

        Yup! And you know, this is what we do and the same advice I would give, and what positive parenting professionals teach. I’m doing all these things – we do ‘rose, bud, thorn’. I do a minimum 5-10 minutes of focused one on one time with each kid every day. We practice ways we could have done better. We name our feelings and our tools to help us manage them.

        Honestly, I think I’m just spun up because it was nothing and then it was two incidents in less than two weeks… I know it’s tied to a trigger event but even with that, I’m just struggling internally with feelings of failure.

        • Anonymous says

          This will teach both of you resilience – that you can do everything ‘right’ and things can go off the rails. You’re not perfect, he’s not perfect but it will be okay. Bumps in the road are not failures.

    • Anonymous says

      You didn’t hit your kid. You are breaking the cycle. That is an incredibly hard thing to do and you should be proud of yourself. A kid having a couple hard days does not mean anything.

    • Anonymous says

      This feeling is probably caused in part by our toxic parenting culture. The parenting influencers and society in general instill in moms the belief that they have the power to shape their children’s behavior by doing everything right. If your child doesn’t behave perfectly, it’s the mom’s fault for not sleep training or being strict enough with BLW or practicing gentle parenting in the exact right way.

      • EDAnon says

        This is true. You mention above rose bud thorn (which we also do) and all the other steps. But even if you’re perfect (which is impossible) your kid may struggle due to things outside your control, like friends, how they’re treated by other adults, mental health challenges unrelated to the environment, etc. You’re doing great. You will get through this.

  5. Anonymous says

    Ladies! A parenting win!

    My husband likes anime. I’ve never been remotely interested. he has a lot of interests and hobbies I can get into but not this one.

    He has gotten all 3 of our kids (5-11) into it. They are going to a double feature anime something or other on Sunday. I will have 12pm-6pm completely to myself!!!!!!

    On balance, I’m taking all 3 kids skiing over the weekend while DH stays home and I couldn’t be happier to have 3 ski bums to drag along. They might whine about the cold but they are a perfect excuse for a waffle. (DH skis too but he has to work).

    • Anon says

      I love this! It sounds great for everyone — particularly if your kids carry their own skis! (I am working on this with mine…)

    • EDAnon says

      This sounds wonderful all around!
      Where do you live that you’re skiing already? It must be mountains?

      • Anonymous says

        Sorry, that was not well written (probably in my excitement over my free Sunday). Skiing is in a couple weeks, though I wish it were this weekend! This weekend is still soccer x3, basketball tryouts and volleyball.

  6. Isabella says

    Please reassure me we won’t be sick forever??? In all of September and October I’ve only worked 17 days, and some of those I had some kind of medical appointment. LB just went back to daycare and I’m taking one more day at home to shake off RSV. Thank God my boss is amazingly understanding, but seriously, when does it end?

    • Anonymous says

      April-May of next year? :) Is this the first fall/winter in daycare? If so, hang in there! We’re finishing up our third round of RSV (second fall in daycare), and it hit me much harder than it hit my kid this time around. She was really only too sick to handle normal activities for one weekend day, so I’ve been able to cough by myself in my home office during the week.

      • Isabella says

        That’s kind of what I thought. And other life events will probably start kicking my butt around that time. Some days it feels like I should just admit I can’t hold down my job.

        • Anonymous says

          You can do it! Keep telling yourself that it’s just one (admittedly crappy and snotty) season in life. At 2, my kid can get herself upright to help cough up all of the gunk, and for the most part, if I hold a kleenex to her nose, she can blow her nose herself (except when she thinks it’d be hilarious to bite the kleenex…)

        • EDAnon says

          If you want to keep your job, then just push through. Mine are 6 and 4 now and we go through periods where I am out a bunch. But then it gets more stable. I love my job and they love me so I just take the flexibility and try to perform well when I am available.

    • Anon says

      i could use the same reassurance! and yes, very very grateful for an understand boss. somehow this week i got strep, but fortunately my kids didnt.

    • Anonymous says

      Not our first fall in daycare but this fall is B R U T A L. Trying to hang in there & hope you can, too.

    • startup lawyer says

      It’s our first fall in school and it’s been nonstop. Ugh.

    • Anon says

      Yeah this winter will be brutal but next winter should be better. My 4 year has had a bunch of colds this fall (after a brutal 2019-March 2020 winter and essentially no illness the last two years thanks to masks), but so far no missed school. When they’re bigger and have more of an immune system they fight things off better.

  7. Anon says

    Does anyone have any of the Learning Resources coding critters? considering them for a holiday gift.

    • Anonymous says

      Yes, they were given to my kids, aged 4 and 2 at the time. The interest in the coding lasted maybe five minutes, then they found the “free play” button and my house was full of yapping, dancing dog sounds. I hid the toy.

  8. Lily says

    Help! We’re throwing a character-themed birthday party for my 4 year old and we’re doing it at our house (well, our large, finished basement). I’m anticipating around 15 kids, ages 1.5-4.5.

    I’m having trouble figuring out how many and what activities to have for the kids. Party starts at 10, and we’ll serve pizza and cake at 12. I’m thinking of having a table full of character-themed coloring pages and crayons – is that lame or will kids like it? (my kid loves to color but not sure if it’s a good activity for a party). Any other ideas you have that are relatively mess-free would be much appreciated (happy for them to use glue for crafts, but no paint or anything really wet).

    I’m trying to hire someone to dress as the character and come sing/dance with the kids, but that may not pan out, so really looking for something to keep the kids entertained. Will definitely have a great kids playlist going.

    TIA!

    • anonM says

      We got those little stampers for a fall party, and kids loved them. Not very messy, too. Some kids really liked the magic color scratch things, but it does leave little flakes behind (easy to vacuum). My aunt is a preschool teacher, and we recruited her to do storytime. She brought a Big book, and the kids loved it. Our library has some you can borrow — maybe recruit someone with theatrical experience to read one you check out?? And remember, even if the guest kids have the same exact toys at home, your kids’ toys will be “new” to them and exciting.

    • Anonymous says

      I think coloring sounds great. My kid birthday party experience is very, very limited to about a dozen 3 year old birthday parties. However, each of these parties have been a total of 2 hours long. I’d serve the pizza and cake at 11, not 12. Every party we’ve been to has had the food or a large table of snacks out from the get go. If it’s going to be nice-ish out, I’d get a bunch of bubbles for outside.

      • Boston Legal Eagle says

        +1 to food earlier. Break up the party half way through as entertaining small children for 2 hours is A LOT. Agree on outside too if you can – big bouncy house is a hit here.

        • Lily says

          Would love to do a bouncy house and we do have the room for it outside, but the party is late November in the Northeast so weather cannot be counted on, unfortunately.

      • Anon says

        Just went to several 6 year old birthday parties that were only 2 hours long. I don’t think you should plan for a longer party until quite a bit older.

    • Anonymous says

      A few words of wisdom, from someone who recently hosted 15 kids for a 4-year-old party: Serve lunch earlier, more like 11:30. Otherwise everyone is going to be exhausted by the time you get to cake. Also, don’t put out snacks during the time you want kids doing an activity together, bc they will just sit there and munch away. And lastly, I recommend a “craft” with stickers. I would buy a bunch of stickers (you can add other crafting supplies, like pompoms and glue, if you’re feeling ambitious) and some on-theme items that the kids can personalize. In the past, I’ve done tambourines and construction hats. It becomes the take-home gift, and the stickers work for a range of ages.

      • NYCer says

        +1 to all of this. Also, 1.5 hours (10-11:30) will be plenty of “play” time before lunch and cake.

    • Lily says

      Thanks all! Will move up lunch to 11:30. The party goes until 12:30 (or at least, that’s what the invite says) so kids can either leave early, or maybe have time to play some more after lunch.

      Ordering stampers and stickers now! Will also put out coloring pages, crayons, glue sticks, paper and crafting materials so they can craft to their heart’s content.

    • Anon says

      If you wanted the coloring to be more structured as an activity, you could have it be like everybody draw Cinderella’s Castle (or whatever is relevant for the character). Or play a few games adapted to be in theme (like red rover but if kids are in character “send all of the princesses over”, “send all of the fairy godmothers over”)? I’m not terribly creative, so I’m sure there’s a better way to do this…

    • DLC says

      We had an at home party when my kid turned four and they had the most fun when we threw them in the basement, turned up the stereo and let them have a dance party with balloons. It was loud and wild, but everyone had a good time.

    • Anon says

      i’d keep the party 10-11:30 and definitely do the food at like 11:15. I think coloring pages is a good idea, but what is the character? i could give more specific activity ideas if i knew which one. I have two 4 year olds and they are recently very into coloring and stickers. i would also have some blank paper that allows them to color whatever they want.

        • Anon says

          if you google, there are a million ideas of games. one involves basically playing musical chairs, but instead of chairs, it is pretend muddy puddles made of brown cardboard/construction paper. you could do pin the X on the peppa, or a peppa pinata, but honestly, 1.5 is way too young for something like that, and my twin 4 year olds at least would be in heaven at a party that allowed for open arts and crafts. Do you have a little tikes slide or some other toys in your basement that cater more towards the younger kids?

    • Anonymous says

      For my 5 years old’s party I bought a bunch of cheap party hats and tons of stickers. Younger siblings especially enjoyed decorating their hats. That’s my only tip. Enjoy!

  9. anonM says

    For those of you out-of-state from immediate family or vice-versa, pros/cons of having the out-of-stater fly home the weekend before the holiday (for us, Christmas)? It sounds good in theory to have my sibling come in to town early, but still close enough to do Christmas-y fun activities. Part of the issue of coming just for a few days around Christmas is A) flights are way more expensive/worse times, etc., and B) we have family obligations with my two sets of in-laws (DH’s parents divorced, so one does Christmas eve, one does Christmas morning) which would limit the time spent with my sibling if they are only in town for four days. (Sigh, strangely missing the covid silver lining last year when they came in for weeks and WFH at my house….). Kids are 2 and 4.

    • Lily says

      Is your sibling invited to your in-laws’ Christmas events? I wouldn’t invite them to stay with you for the holidays if you’re going to be leaving them alone to go to your in-laws’ house on Xmas eve/morning.

      I guess the cons areif you don’t get along well with your sibling, or if your sibling expects to be entertained at all times, or if you sibling will stress you out when you’re trying to wrap presents/plan meals etc. etc. Holidays can be stressful and if you add guests into the mix, it can be worse. But if you’re close and your sibling is likely to help out/not add stress, then I’d say do it.

    • Anonymous says

      I mean I see zero cons. And also it’s ok to tell DH that his family doesn’t get Christmas Eve and Christmas Day every year. You’re lucky your sibling is able and willing to visit. Embrace it.

      • Anon says

        Yeah I’m not Christian but it seems weird for one side of the family to get both Christmas Eve and Christmas Day every year.

        • anonM says

          I really wish there was an easier way to do this, but I’ve just given up on changing this. Both MIL and step-MIL really feel strongly about Christmas and having all the kids there (and are pretty relaxed about all other holidays, to be fair). And because all the in-laws on that side were previously married and have adult kids from those marriages, it’s complicated getting all the adult kids in one place at one time. To make myself sound totally batty, it’s technically Christmas eve at FIL’s, Christmas breakfast with MIL, then we all go to the other side of the family for dinner/pm (and I host myY side of the family). I’m grateful for having loving family members, etc. etc., but it is a lot tbh.

          • Anonymous says

            I mean I can’t fathom refusing your siblings visit because you refuse to have boundaries with his family. If my sister treated me like that it would be devastating and crushing to our relationship. Don’t short change your family because they aren’t the loudest most unreasonable people.

          • SC says

            I live the same life at Christmas. DH’s parents are divorced, in town, and he has a full sibling plus 2 step-siblings on each side, who all have their own families. DH’s mom’s family gets Christmas Eve, and his dad gets Christmas breakfast. If anyone tries to move anything, it topples the dominoes for his adult siblings, who are negotiating schedules with their other parent and their in-laws.

            We’ve actually had success simplifying/ shortening the gatherings themselves. It happened after my kid bit his cousin and then me after Christmas lunch lasted way too long. MIL has dropped her large meal–last year, she set up a cookie decorating activity for the kids, then they opened presents, and we went to her extended family’s gathering. FIL’s gathering is breakfast and gifts. We now protect the rest of Christmas Day.

            My parents generously offer to visit after Christmas, and they stay through New Year’s. And we celebrate my dad’s birthday while they’re here.

    • Anonymous says

      My mom does this with my sister’s family. She visits before Christmas – it’s less chaotic and less expensive. They have their own traditions around going skating and going to see Christmas lights at the Botanical Gardens, school Christmas pageant, and baking Christmas cookies to leave for Santa.

      I’m a fan of Christmas as a holiday season vs all the hype on Christmas morning so the weekend before Christmas would work for me for sure.

    • Anon says

      I second the comments about 1) DH’s family shouldn’t get to monopolize both Christmas Eve and Christmas Day every year and 2) if your sibling is in town, they should be invited to DH’s family’s celebrations.

      If sibling isn’t with you for Christmas, what are their plans? I think them coming early could be fun, but would want to make sure they have good options for actual Christmas too.

      Will people be off when the sibling comes to visit? I come from a family of teachers, so am used to many but not all of the adults and all of the kids in a family being off the last 2 weeks of the year. So, if sibling comes before that – are they just coming for a weekend? Are people taking off to spend more than a weekend with them?

    • Anon says

      Comments like this are always a reminder (I mean this in the nicest way) that I am grateful for my immigrant non-Catholic in laws, who are a lot to handle, but allow me the full authority on what we do on Thanksgiving and Christmas, as those are not holidays that they celebrate or observe. Thank you for the reminder that this is my silver lining! :)

      • Anon says

        Every discussion about Christmas here makes me glad to be Jewish. Hanukkah isn’t zero stress but it’s not even in the same universe as Christmas in terms of the stress and family drama. And no f-ing Elf on the Shelf!!

  10. Anon says

    I need to bring baked goods to an event at my kid’s school. I enjoy baking and am good at it, but I’m absolutely slammed at work right now. Any favorite recipes that are quick but still really tasty?

    • Colorado says

      Smitten Kitchen confetti cookies in school colors or Halloween colors.

      • Anonymous says

        I love baked goods but would be super excited to see Chex Mix at a bake sale.

    • Spirograph says

      do no-bake cookies count as baked goods? I also love to bake and am good at it, but they are my go-to when I just don’t have the time/energy. just make sure to leave enough time for them to chill and really set.

    • Anonymous says

      Pumpkin muffins! Mix together 1 box yellow cake mix (take care not to buy the kind with pudding in it) and one can of pumpkin (not pumpkin pie filling). Half fill 24 muffin cups with the mixture. Bake at 375 for 15 minutes. You can add semi-sweet chocolate chips into the mix if you wish. These are a huge it: I make them for almost every fall event.

    • Anonymous says

      I would buy premade cookies or cupcakes vs baking brownies.

      When we actually bake, I do lemon bars because my kids love them and I can do them Gluten free which people appreciate.

      • Anon says

        This. I would buy a box of pre-made cookies from the grocery bakery and feel zero remorse about it.

        If you want to be extra, find a box that is gluten free or nut free, and when you hand them over still in the packaging, you say “Oh I wanted to make sure any allergy kids were covered, you can check the ingredients if needed!” and then breeze away.

        If you can’t bring yourself to do it, send your spouse (assuming it’s a “he”) to buy it and take in the box. They’ll fawn over him just for being present and talk about how good of a dad he is. And then remember that low bar next time you’re tempted to bake something for a school event.

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