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Cb says
Adventures in Scottish parenting…trying to keep a neutral face when your 6-year-old informed you that at camp, they practiced ax throwing!
anonM says
My 5yo would be so thrilled with this. He loves tools so much, and people think I’m nuts for letting him do things like saw, chip bricks with a hammer, etc. But maybe I just need to find a Scottish summer camp for him, hahha!
Anon says
I have almost two weeks at home with my 5 year old between the end of daycare and the start of kindergarten, and am compiling a list of things to do during that time, both fun and practical.
Here’s what I have so far:
-beach day
-back to school shopping for both school supplies and clothes
-doctor appointment
-haircut
-meet the teacher meeting
-movie theater movie
-afternoon tea at the fancy pastry shop
-our regular weekend stuff (pool, library, playground, kids museum)
Anything else you’d add? It’s going to be very hot, so I think we’ll want to be inside or in the water.
anon says
Playdates with friends (new or old) who will be in their K class
Boston Legal Eagle says
What does s/he like doing? If they’re into it, maybe you can set some time to do a special lego project or craft project indoors. We also took our then rising Kindergartener to a local amusement/water park and he really enjoyed, especially since he got both parents without his brother there too.
Cb says
That sounds fun! Maybe some packed lunch practice if that’s not your normal routine? I’m packing for camp this week and mentally thanking the government for free school lunches so it’s not a regular thing.
More Sleep Would Be Nice says
This is a great list!
DS #1’s last day at his TK/summer camp is Thursday. Then he’s off to the Y for a week, and then my MIL is visiting for until school starts – we go to an all-inclusive resort, and then she will do a version of “Grandma Camp”, which will include some of these things.
I’m thrilled he’ll get this time with her because she isn’t local, and have unstructured time generally, and I know we’re lucky to have a grandparent willing to do this…but very bittersweet for me that that she gets this time.
(I could have coordinated a few days off with them, but I’d rather it not be me, her, and DS #1 – I need space from her).
OOO says
Can you travel to a nearby major city and stay at a hotel for a couple nights, and go to an art museum, aquarium, planetarium, etc?
In your own town, how about something crafty like ceramic painting or a cake decorating workshop?
Anon says
This type of approach sounds fantastic – way better than filling the time with chores and appointments. Love the pastry shop idea in the OP’s post too.
Anonymous says
I recently realized my rising first grader was due for teeth cleaning, so maybe add the dentist if it’s not already scheduled?
Anon says
Sometimes I’m so jealous of all of you with one kid per age. I have 5 year old twins which can be super fun, but so hard to do things like take one on a trip
anon says
I’d beef up the beach days to 2 or 3 days over two weeks if you’re not too far. We’re about 30 mins from the “good” beach and we can’t get enough with our 5 year old. Endless entertainment and relatively low key/pressure for us. It’s our absolute default when we have nothing else that has to get done this time of year. We also like going early and often get home around 1o r 2 after lunch on the beach. She’s spent for the rest of the day so it’s really easy to have her do some coloring, “quiet time” with books and some TV to get through the balance of the day.
Anonymous says
My youngest is going to K.
Specific to kindy kid:
Playground meetup with some future classmates (this one is easy since I have older kids and know some incoming kiddos from that as well as preK)
Mani/pedi
Lunch date at a Real Restaurant
Attend K orientation/meet the teachers day
This isn’t specific to her but for all my kids:
New sneaks
Pick out outfits for the first few days
New lunchbox
Buy snacks and plan school lunches (my kids like to have a say in this)
Haircuts
Make sure we have fall clothes in their sizes. We are in New England so we go from hot blazing summer to chilly fall quickly!
Practice early morning wakeups
Week at the beach to close out summer
Amusement park day
Anon says
I was the poster yesterday who has a kiddo who doesn’t want to go to camp in the morning. When we picked her up yesterday I asked her if it was a thumbs up, thumb sideways or thumbs down kind of day. She was all smiles and said it was a thumbs up day….then this morning she said as sobbing and clutching to me at drop off that she didn’t want tO go. I still sent her and the camp messaged me to let me know she calmed down after i left, but it is so hard to know how to handle these situations!!!
anon says
Things that help my anxious kid:
–Show up just before the drop off window opens so they are the very first kid there. They get more attention from staff and aren’t arriving into kid chaos. My anxious kid does better arriving at a quiet camp and then watching other kids show up.
–Alternatively, drop off shortly after camp has started and all the kids are in their smaller groups to avoid dropping off into a mass of unsorted kids in a gym.
–Ask the camp to see if she can get special attention from one of the counselors. Have that counselor available at drop off to support a calm transition.
–Carpool with a friend who is attending camp so they can walk in together.
anon says
My kid is this kid, she cries in the drop-off line and we have to pull aside to walk her in. When we tried to get more out of her, she said she doesn’t know why she’s sad at drop off. She keeps asking to go back to school – I think she reallllly thrives on the predictability of school.
Just sending solidarity
Anon says
Tips on finding a nanny that’s a good fit? Go with your gut?
Anonymous says
Definitely go with your gut and call the references. Also, make sure you’ve clearly, clearly communicated your expectations with the potential nanny – don’t assume they will know what you are expecting for: food preparation, loading/unloading the dishwasher, handling laundry, taking pictures of/posting on social media (chances are your child is adorable and they might take pictures to send to you. I was fine with that, I was not okay with any posting by her on social media, and specified that in our contract), what the general state of the house should be when you arrive home, what sorts of activities the nanny will do with your child.
Anon says
references – talk to as many as possible.
Anon says
The thing that’s been most successful for me is hiring any potential candidate to do a test day. After going through the interview and calling references, I set up a day where I work from home or stay home if it’s a weekend, and have the nanny work the typical day while I’m around. For the nannies who have not worked out, I’ve known – in my gut – it’s a bad fit after hour 1 or so, and for nannies we’ve kept for years, I’ve also known in the first 3 hours that we are on the same page.
Toddler running away says
Does anyone have advice for a toddler who loves (gleefully) trying to run away (and is FAST)? It’s not a sensory/escape due to being uncomfortable thing. She’s been doing it pretty much since she learned to run and she thinks it is HILARIOUS to run away from mama/dada/nanny, but it is terrifying because she is not yet 3 and has no concept of cars/traffic/water etc. And she’s extremely tall and fast. It basically means we have to walk with a death grip on her arm and it is not possible to take her and our baby on a walk or to the playground unless there are 2 adults present so one can be completely devoted to chasing her down. I feel trapped in the house but have to prioritize her safety – but this kind of sucks.
We do not have a backyard, just a big deck.
Anon says
Put her in a stroller to go on a walk. Do you have any gated playgrounds where you live? Those were the only ones i felt comfortable taking my twins to
To says
She has a piggyback board she uses when we walk somewhere as a family (her brother sits in the stroller seat and she stands on the piggyback board). But that doesn’t allow her to get her energy out the way that walking would.
NYCer says
Can you get a double stroller so you can strap her in?
Toddler running away says
We have a great gated playground that is a 10 minute walk away, but the other m-fing parents leave the gates open 90% of the time. Seriously, there are 3 gates, and I can count on one hand the number of times I’ve arrived and all three are closed (and stay closed while we are there).
anonM says
Hi Toddler Running! This sounds very stressful, and parents without runners often don’t get it! (Hi, that was me! I didn’t get it until watching two separate friends’ kids that bolted and it scared the sh*t out of me!! They’re so FAST! My kids do other frustrating things but not this, but now I get what my friends were talking about. These are otherwise kids who listen pretty well, too!). TBH, you need to find a way to get outside for everyone’s sanity. Can you bring your own neon laminated signs and stick them on each gate when you get there? (“For Safety and Sanity reasons, please close gate behind you. Thanks for your understanding!”). Maybe an obnoxious person will still be rude, but I would really really hope most parents would be like “ohhh shoot I always forget that, I’ll be careful today.” I’d also take them down when you leave every time, because humans tend to start ignoring signs that are left up permanently.
Cb says
I know people are weird about baby leads but it’s a safety concern. My son had a little backpack with a tether, we didn’t use it for long but it was helpful in busy places.
Anonymous says
This. My twins liked to carry a small stuffie or snack in the backpack. Just knowing that the leash was slipped on the backpack and if they ran, I would have to start using it, was often enough of an incentive not to run. Mostly used in airports or other areas near super busy streets.
Anon says
+1. If you have a runner, you need a backpack with a tether. Cue the Modern Family episode with the child safety tether…
Anon says
Just some thoughts:
1) how do you react? The bigger the reaction, probably the more fun for her.
2) we make it a game with my toddler: “run to the corner” “stop at the corner” “can you hop to the corner” “can you walk backwards to the corner” — do this only in a safe neighborhood in case she darts off. We practice it a lot so it’s ingrained that he can be wild on the sidewalk, and only the sidewalk.
anon says
A three year old should be big enough to be taught to stay with you. We had this issue with a very fast 18 mo, but by 3 yo they were pretty well trained.
I’d strap her into a stroller or wagon if she isn’t compliant and you can’t chase her. She gets strapped in if she can’t listen. But you also need to find time to train her. She’s big enough to learn not to bolt.
When practicing, you could offer to let her push something (e.g., a baby stroller) as long as she stays with you. The stroller and doll can go away if she doesn’t listen. She might also ride on a tricycle or something with a push handle, but make it contingent on her staying with you. A micromini scooter might also help motivate her to stay with you. Lots of praise for cooperating. Big consequences if she can’t listen–strap her in a stroller and give her zero attention for the behavior.
Toddler running away says
To add:
We do not own a double stroller – she outgrew our Vista many months ago – very very tall – and we didn’t buy a side-by-side double stroller with a larger height max because she wasn’t really interested in riding in the stroller anymore anyway. So there is nothing to strap her into during walks b/c the baby is in the stroller seat (that she’s now too tall for anyway).
anon says
I’d look for a used CitiMini double stroller, or put the baby in a carrier and the 3 yo in a stroller. Being locked in the house isn’t working for you.
Toddler running away says
She’s about an inch away from being too tall for the CitiMini (44 inch height max), which is why we are hoping to solve this problem without buying another stroller.
anon says
It really depends on how she’s proportioned. At some point they start growing longer legs and then the shoulder straps still fit for a while. We had my 6.5 yo in a CitiMini for Disney and it was squishy, but fine. She preferred it to walking.
I’ll add that it’s not like a car seat where it’s a safety concern–if she’s a little uncomfortable being squished a stroller, then she can listen and not run off.
I got a used CitiMini on a local list serve for $15. It was older and faded, but worked fine. It doesn’t have to be a long term investment. You could also look for a double Bob–I don’t know if they fit bigger kids.
Anon says
You could do a stroller wagon. We still get good use out of it with a 4 year old. Even if I only have my youngest in there, it’s nice because there’s tons of room if I need to bring stuff to a place or pick up groceries.
Anonymous says
Yeah… who cares about height limits? They’re dumb for stuff like this. Weight limits are really all that I pay attention to. You’re limiting yourself unnecessarily.
NYCer says
Yeah my 4 year old daughter is too tall for the Yoyo technically, but we still use it all the time. We never strap her in because we do not have this running issue, but the straps still fit.
Anonymous says
Buy the stroller. I had a kid like this. She used the city mini double until like age 5 and she was far far too tall for it.
TheElms says
It is still safer to strap her into a seat that she has exceeded the height limit for than to let her run into traffic. We still strap our 43 inch 4 year old into our Uppababy Cruz (which I think also has a 40 inch height limit) when there is a safety issue. Yes her head bumps the canopy a bit but that’s fine. And then I wear my 18 month old in an ergo who would normally be in the stroller.
Anonymous says
I had a kid like this. She did eventually outgrow it but had other annoying behaviors to replace it. I carried her or put her in a carrying pouch of some kind far longer than I should have so she didn’t bolt.
Anonymous says
I would start experimenting with a variety of positive and negative rewards that you actually follow through on–go on a 1:1 walk outing for ice cream, but she only gets ice cream if she doesn’t run away, etc. You need to find a version that really clicks for her. And then I would buy the evenflo wagon, which we have. The kids bump feet/ knees a bit but it works fine up to 55 lbs or something like that.
llamapaws says
This is why my toddler had a leash until recently. Fwiw, nobody ever gave me a hard time about it.
Runner says
Heading to the San Diego zoo this Thursday! Kiddos are 4.5 and 4.5. Have done some research and we will get there as soon as the zoo opens, and take advantage of the bus tour and the sky ferry. I really want to see the platypuses, and I am hoping we can attend one or two zoo talks (I think there’s one at noon). Other than that I am trying to think about lacing ourselves, bringing snacks, etc. Any advice? Must see animals?
Anonymous says
Looking for electronic calendar recommendations. I’ve always Outlook on my work computer. Overall, it seems to work best for me to have both work and personal commitments in one place. I am switching jobs. I’ll have about 3 weeks off between jobs. And then I’m also trying to decie if I might try harder to keep person stuff off of my work computer at my new position. We also have a paper calendar on our wall with trips/kiddo’s activities, etc. But I need something electronic that I can acess from anywhere. Recommendations for programs/apps, etc? I’ve never really gotten into the Google calendar, but it’s an option. Thanks!
Cb says
I’ve kept everything on Outlook (inviting my husband to relevant things) and now am full of regret b/c I’m changing jobs and need to go transfer everything. I’ve never found the google calendar/outlook integration on my desktop to be great- it’s fine on phone but it doesn’t always load my gmail calendar properly in outlook. I’m just going to download my outlook calendar and re-upload it to my new outlook. I’m an academic though, and 80% of my colleague don’t use their outlook calendar, so no one will care if I’ve got the school run/theme day etc in my calendar.
We have a big wall calendar for big picture stuff for the year as well.
anonM says
I like google calendar. I have several separate calendars that I can show/hide as needed, and share with others as needed. One is reoccurring things like family birthdays/anniversaries/etc. One is personal. One is work. One is kid school.
Anon says
Google calendar all the way
anon says
+1
If you have an Android, add the calendar widget to your home screen.
CCLA says
I have to use outlook for work, which gets pulled onto my phone, and then DH and I use the calendar function on our iphones for shared info. I like that the iphone supports pulling in multiple calendars – we also share another calendar with our nanny so my phone shows me three different calendars at once. The only downside is that I have not yet figured out a way to automatically enter an appt into multiple calendars – if I enter it on the phone, it lets me pick if it’s work/family/nanny, but not select to push to multiple at once. That would be amazing.
I would really struggle keeping personal stuff off my work calendar because like you note it works best to see everything in one place – I need to know if Tuesday afternoon is blocked because of a client meeting or because of a pedi appt.
Anon says
It’s extra, but I have an Asana for family stuff. I like it way more than Google calendar.
OP says
Thanks, everyone! Also, I just read all the typos in my message. Yikes. Sorry about that.
Anon says
Any advice on how to find a good night nurse for postpartum help? I don’t know anyone IRL who has used one. I’m expecting my second child in January, and had very bad postpartum anxiety with my first. Lack of sleep worsens my anxiety, so having someone come so that I can get a solid nightly block of sleep from the beginning is really appealing. My husband won’t be able to help much with the baby (biglaw partner, and we have three other children – I have two stepchildren as well – that will need his attention).
Anon says
Local moms board, your pediatrician, lactation consultants, your ob/gyn all seem like good local places to start. In NYC, at least, it’s a very word of mouth type of situation.
Anon says
Where do you live? Can your husband also ask around at work? I’d bet some other partners used them or other attorneys or their spouses. You could try asking your pediatrician or local Facebook group
Anon says
Do you have a doula? If yes, ask your doula for recommendations. If no…then you should get a doula, because honestly every woman should have one, and if you have biglaw money you can afford it, and it is THE BEST. And then your doula can make recommendations.
Proud of you for knowing what help you will need and asking for it!
Anon says
I’d ask a local parenting Facebook group for recs.
NYCer says
+1. If you’re in NYC, we initially found our wonderful night nurse via Baby Nurse Guru, which I found through Facebook.
CCLA says
We used an agency. If you’re in the LA metro area I highly recommend Sleeping Angels Co. Some of the best money we’ve ever spent. It was like buying sleep. Have your husband ask around to any of his partners that have young children, many biglaw partners use them, I’d be shocked if he couldn’t get a rec from someone in his office (even if the partner doesn’t know offhand, they would know if they had someone in their home and could ask their spouse for the rec).
Anonymous says
I think someone here has recommended Kinderhotels before–any advice on what to think about when choosing one? Are some locations better than others, or better in winter? Do they work for grandparents, too? We’re thinking of doing a winter trip this year. Ty!