Maternity Monday: Plaid Elbow-Sleeve Dress

I have become mildly obsessed with whether or not to have a third child. Our life circumstances point in the direction of not doing it, but I can’t shake the feeling that our family won’t be complete without a third child. I used to think that was just because, after two beautiful sons, I wanted the experience of raising a daughter, too, but now I am thinking that I would want to do it even if we were told it would 100% be a boy.

BUT, here are the life circumstances that make it admittedly ridiculous: (1) We had major fertility issues and if we wanted a third would either adopt or (more likely) use donor eggs; (2) I am 40 years old and would want to wait at least another year before getting pregnant for child-spacing reasons – putting aside the risk of genetic abnormalities (bc we wouldn’t use my eggs), am I just too old?; (3) I really struggle with the first baby year, I find it very hard and greatly prefer the older ages – in my hardest moments, I think we’re crazy to even consider it; (4) I worry that I can’t handle the chaos of three kids, but this might be influenced by the fact that the two kids we do have are close in age and we are still very much in the thick of it (they are 10 months and almost-3 years old); (5) I have had two c-sections and the idea of being pregnant again/having a third c-section is daunting but doable.

I recognize that I have been extremely blessed with two beautiful boys, and I don’t want to press my luck. But I also don’t want to regret not going for a third baby because when I picture us in the elementary/high school years, I love the idea of three kids. It’s those baby years that I’m kind of scared of.

I guess I’m not asking for this group to make the decision for me so much as share any experiences you have had that may be similar. Thanks so much!

Help me plan the outfit logistics for a client meeting in early May: Flying out at 10am and landing at 5pm. Very nice dinner at 6:30 with the clients, and I do not know whether we will go straight from the airport to dinner, but I suspect that we will. (Traveling with two guys.) I’m thinking of a wrap dress with flats for the flight, change into heels for dinner, bring make-up, a brush and hair dryer for clean-up in the airport bathroom. (You can carry on a hair-dryer, right?) Wrap-dress is pretty comfy and does not wrinkle. I would wear knee-high boots but I’m worried that they are a bit outdated and not nice enough for a fancy dinner. We are flying from one cold locale to another, different cold locale. We have a business meeting in the morning, where I am planning on wearing dress pants and jacket, and then we fly back home that afternoon.

This is my first intense fly in and out meeting like this. Any tips?

For those who have taken long flights with kids (mine are 5 and 3) on United, do you recommend purchasing economy plus seats? We will be taking a trip involving two long haul non-stop flights (9 hrs), with a red eye return flight. Economy plus is $450-$600 each way, which seems like a crazy premium. But would it be money well spent? I can’t decide, and flyertalk seems to be peopled with those who fly first/business class rather than normal mortals. My husband and I are not large people, so we don’t need the extra legroom, but economy is so cramped these days, even for people our size.

Does anyone have a kid who wears SMOs or AFOs? What do your kids do for dress shoes or summer? I’ve come to hate easter and christmas because I can’t find any cute shoes that accommodate DD’s SMOs and then she ends up wearing her new balance shoes and nasty relatives make comments about why I couldn’t put her in nicer shoes with her nice dress. Also last summer her feet would get sooo hot in the SMOs, plus socks, plus shoes. Anyone have any tips?

Partner and I have discussed trying to conceive this fall. I am on a number of medications that need to be stopped before we try (birth control, anti-anxiety pills, doxycline for rosacea). I am having a LOT of worry about how my body will react when I stop these medications. I know I can’t be the first one to have stopped taking medications that improve their quality of life in order to try to conceive. How have others managed this transition? Did your expectations of how your body might react match reality? Or were you more concerned than you needed to be? I have relied on the drugs I currently take for ten years, and it’s frightening me that I don’t have a “baseline” of what my body is like without them anymore.