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I love this flowy top from Zara. I don’t love the way they only show it with the matching skirt, because it’s a little tough to get a sense of the shape of the top. However, it looks loose and flowy and comfortable. I like how the V-neck shows a little bit of skin to offset the looseness, the mid-length sleeve with the ruffle trim, and the all-over print. I would wear this with slim/skinny black pants and a bootie with a chunky heel. I also think this top would be great for hiding an early pregnancy at work, or even for wearing into pregnancy as a maternity top. It’s available at Zara for $39.90. Long Print Blouse
Looking for other washable workwear? See all of our recent recommendations for washable clothes for work, or check out our roundup of the best brands for washable workwear.
Sales of note for 3.28.24
(See all of the latest workwear sales at Corporette!)
- Ann Taylor – Up to 40% off your full-price purchase; extra 50% off sale
- Banana Republic Factory – 50-70% off everything plus extra 20% off purchase
- Eloquii – 50% off 2+ items; 40% off 1
- J.Crew – 50% off select styles
- Lands’ End – 10% off your order
- Loft – 50% off everything
- Nordstrom: Give $150 in gift cards, earn a $25 promo card (ends 3/31)
- Talbots – 40% off 1 item; 25% off everything else
- Zappos – 37,000+ women’s sale items! (check out these reader-favorite workwear brands on sale, and some of our favorite kids’ shoe brands on sale)
Kid/Family Sales
- Carter’s – 50% off entire site
- Hanna Andersson – 30% off all swim; up to 30% off HannaJams
- J.Crew Crewcuts – 40% off sitewide; 50% off select swim; 50% off kids’ styles
- Old Navy – 50% off Easter deals
- Target – 20% off Easter styles for all; up to 30% off kitchen & dining; BOGO 50% off shoes & slippers for the family;
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And — here are some of our latest threadjacks of interest – working mom questions asked by the commenters!
- If you’re a working parent of an infant with low sleep needs, how do you function at work when you’re in the throes of baby’s sleep regression?
- Should I cut my childcare down to 12 hours a month if I work from home?
- Will my baby have speech delays if we raise her bilingual?
- Has anyone given birth in a teaching hospital?
- My child eats everything, and my friends’ kids do not – how should I handle? In general, what is the best way to handle when your child has some skill/ability and your friend’s child doesn’t have that skill/ability?
- ADHD moms, give me your tips to help with things like behavior in the classroom, attention to detail, etc?
- I think I suffer from mom rage…
- My husband and kids are gone this weekend – how should I enjoy my free time?
- I’m struggling to be compassionate with a SAHM friend who complains she doesn’t have enough hours of childcare.
- If you exclusively formula fed, what tips do you have for in the hospital and coming home?
- Could I take my 4-yo and 8-yo on a 7-8 day trip to Paris, Lyon, and Madrid?
Jessamyn says
Can anyone speak to an experience in having a preschooler change daycare classes? We have developed some significant concerns with my daughter’s teacher over the last several months, and on Monday she is transitioning to a different class. She’s four, and I’m not sure how she will handle it. Any tips for making it easier for her, or for assuaging my own guilt if she has a tough time, remembering that this was the right decision?
Anon says
I think 4 is young enough that you can probably just frame it like any other room transition – she’s growing up and moving on from this room, and she’ll have so much fun in her new room. The nuance that the kids in the new room are the same age as the kids in the old room will probably be lost on her.
Kids handle room transitions with varying degrees of ease, but they all survive.
Boston Legal Eagle says
Accept that she might feel sad and cry and cling a lot at first (or might not!) Some kids are more sensitive to changes and it’s nothing that you did wrong or should feel guilty about, the best thing you can do is to just meet them where they are. Acknowledge her feelings and maybe play up something cool about the new room like new toys or new friends, etc. She’s going to have many transitions in the future and you can’t prevent the feelings that will come up. You could also plan some fun kid-parent times for the weekends.
Anonymous says
Does she know any of the kids in the new classroom? It sounds like she is switching rooms, not teachers, right? Is she going to K in the fall or will there be another classroom before she leaves for K?
Anonymous says
Trying to figure out if I need to go to the doctor (I haven’t had a sick visit to the doctor in years, but now I have a baby so…). I have a sore throat/cough, red watery eyes, and now my ear is starting to hurt from pressure build up. Normally I’d assume a virus and just eat soup and rest, but should I get checked out and see if I need antibiotics?
Anonymous says
It sounds to me like a virus. The big flags that might indicate the need for antibiotics are 1) fever or 2) continuing symptoms in one area of your body while other symptoms resolve. Like if you continue to have extreme head pain and pressure after your sneezing and coughing goes away that’s indicative of a sinus infection. Or a cough that lingers for weeks may be bronchitis or pneumonia. Otherwise you just have to power through it.
Jessamyn says
Make sure to take OTC meds for your symptoms, that might help a lot.
Anonymous says
Do you have a CVC minute clinic near you? I find those are pretty great for getting in and out quickly, a lot of insurers accept them, and you can book an appointment online.
Anonymous says
I’d call the nurse with this information – explain to her exactly what you said here. I really like doing that (for myself and kiddo) because they’re usually in the know on what is presently going around in your area. That will inform their recommendation. Maybe we’ve just been lucky, but the nurses we talk to are truly amazing.
Anon says
Unless the pain is severe I always give these things at least 2-3 days. If you aren’t getting any better by that point, see a doctor.
Katy says
Counterpoint…. I had 2 “colds” last year that actually were strep! A week in to the first one, I finally went to the doctor because I thought the little one had an ear infection (yup and we caught it early- phew.). She then said… maybe we should look at you and told me to fill the antibiotics before we even got the swab back. 24 hours later I was SO MUCH better. lesson learned. Only waited 2 days the second time. [NOTE: I haven’t had antibiotics in probably a decade other than one UTI except for 3 times last winter….]
Katy says
sorry…. so basically I am saying don’t suffer too long before you go in. ALL kinds of stuff gets passed around at daycare. Last winter the LO was still touching faces etc. a lot too.
Anonymous says
Yeah, if the symptoms seem out of the ordinary for you, I’d go. A couple months ago I thought I had what was a bad cold with a lot of pain and pressure in my head. No fever and I had only been feeling really bad for a couple days, but I went to urgent care anyway, and the doctor said I had a sinus infection and needed meds. I started feeling better within a few hours and the next day I felt completely fine (indicating, in my opinion anyway, that antibiotics were necessary).
Boston Legal Eagle says
Same! Never had a sinus infection before but the sinus pressure and headache after a 1.5 week cold led me to urgent care. Felt better that day.
Anonymous says
Have you taken straight up Sudafed? It sounds like a virus to me, but Sudafed will relieve a bit of ear pressure even if it is an ear infection that needs antibiotics. You can get the 30mg tablets from the pharmacist that don’t last as long as the slow release (but usually work better). If you’re nursing any supply is established you should be OK if you take it for 2 days. FWIW I used to WFH those days and just go to urgent care first thing in the morning, trying to be the first patient
CCLA says
Another vote for real sudafed. That usually relieves sinus pain (which is connected with ears). Also, two options to consider if you don’t want to or can’t make it to doc office: (1) teledoc, which many health insurance providers offer for a minimal charge – I picked a time slot later that day, got a call, and five minutes later there was an rx ordered (of course there is probably a limit to the range of what they’ll rx without an exam), and (2) heal app, which is one of my favorite discoveries as a parent. They send docs to your house. In my urban area I can usually see someone same day. I use it for myself and we use it for all sick child visits. We recently transitioned to using them for well child exams as well.
anon says
This is a weird one for you all – I think I need a gut check. We hired a part-time nanny recently. I found her on care.com and called two references (she’d worked long-term for both). She’s wonderful and we love her. Around 30, studying in the US. We did not do a background check because she’s on a student visa so actually wasn’t able to keep her care.com profile where I found her.
Really get a great feeling from her and she’s been working for us for over a month. References were all positive – worked for one for 5 years and one for 2 years. Overall I’ve found her to be very sweet but overall private.
Last night I googled her and found her facebook profile and it looks like she has a son? Maybe around 10 years old? She’s here studying and lives alone. I’d asked if she has nieces or nephews but it hadn’t occurred to me to ask about a child. The last picture of him was a couple years ago – she hasn’t frequently updated this.
So first, maybe I shouldn’t be checking out my employees facebook profile – but it’s public and honestly she’s with my kids a lot. Now I’m very curious – worried that no matter what this is a sad story. But also worried that I know so little about someone I’m trusting to watch my kids.
Thoughts from others? I think I might just wait and see if I can continue to gain her trust, but agh, it was a weird discovery.
Anon says
Maybe he passes away and she doesn’t want to talk about it? Or maybe it’s not her kid? I really don’t know how much you can infer from social media. Nothing about this suggests she’s untrustworthy. I’m a private and introverted person but I never became personal friends with our nanny. I knew when she became pregnant because it affected her work (needed time off, etc) but otherwise I didn’t really know anything about her personal life and I was fine with that. Unless you think she’s lying to you I wouldn’t worry.
LadyNFS says
You mentioned she’s here on a Visa -maybe her son is in her home country being cared for by a relative while she works and sends money home (sad but very common). My own nanny did that for about 5-6 years here in the US while she worked to gain citizenship (before we hired her, but I know the backstory). I don’t think this impacts trustworthiness as she’s not actually lied about anything and could be keeping this piece private.
OP says
That’s my biggest fear. She seems to have had a tough life and she’s still quite young. I’m not going to worry about it. Will just try to be a good employer!
Thanks for taking this one seriously all – I appreciate the gut checks.
Anonymous says
This has nothing to do with you. Mind your own business.
Anon says
Many people leave children back in their home country to come to the US and work and send money back for their kid. Maybe she is doing that? If she is here on a student visa, is she legally able to work for you? If you are an average Joe I wouldn’t care that much about the legality but if you need to maintain a security clearance or might run for office or become a judge it is important.
GCA says
If she’s on a student visa, she is (I believe) legally allowed to work only on her campus up to 20h/ week during the semester, unless there are emergency circumstances.
anon says
Yeah, that’s right. She’s working about 20 hours per week for us but off campus…
OP says
Yeah, these are all great points. Thanks all. I suspect she’s sending money back. It was more startling than anything else. And made me sad – also that it’s something that’s so private, you know?
We have always hired people to work for us on the books – that’s one reason I used the website we did to find someone, I think you’re generally required to be able to legally work to be on there. We just happened to end up talking to her and liking her before we figured out the student visa thing and honestly I’m sympathetic! It’s only part time,so we are paying her off the books. Not going to run for judge!
Anon says
Are you sure it’s actually her child? If it’s just a photo, seems like it could be a relative, friend’s child, neighbor, etc.
OP says
It’s hers. Multiple pictures and comments about “my son”… (I didn’t go super deep into her profile, was able to find that on the homepage!)
Anon says
If she’s not a native English speaker, it may be something lost in translation or a term of endearment that’s more common in her culture? I have a picture on my Facebook page of me with “my nephew” who is not my biological nephew (BFF’s kid). But I also don’t think it’s a big deal if it is her son.
Juggling says
Thanks for your response to my post on yesterday’s thread, Katy! I posted it at 3pm yesterday and it didn’t show up until this morning.
Katy says
good luck with your decision. And congratulations on finding several opportunities!
Outsourcing says
Looking for help regarding the best way to outsource / pay for some additional help at this point in my life.
Background: I’m starting my third trimester and have a 2-year old. I recently got a big promotion at work so my workload/stress/responsibility has ramped up dramatically. My husband travels for work about 80% of the time and is usually gone 4-5 nights a week. As my pregnancy has progressed, I’ve realized me working so much and being the solo “default parent” all of the time because he’s gone so much is not sustainable, so I’m looking to throw money at this problem to help me survive the third trimester and the next 6-12 months as a working mom of 2 with no partner around.
We already have a housekeeper who comes twice/month and a great nanny who’s with us while I’m working but unfortunately can’t pick up any more hours. Assuming money is no object (it is, but let’s daydream here), what kind of help would you get if you were in my shoes? I’m thinking an evening mother’s helper 2-3 hours/day at least a few days a week to be an extra set of hands when I’m home from work, and/or finding a healthy-ish local meal delivery service so I never have to stress over what’s for dinner again. Any other ideas or thoughts?
anon says
We have someone who stays until 7 every night so I can put down baby and then takeover big kid bedtime (my husband travels or stays at work until 7 so that period is always me). We have three, so may be less necessary but I can’t tell you how great some extra evening help is. Could you get someone to help you out by doing 2 year old’s bath and pjs routine while you focus on the newborn? This is more for post-baby I guess but it’s made our evenings way more relaxing.
Anon says
This sounds ideal! How did you find part-time evening help?
anon says
She’s actually the person who maybe has a kid in her home country! Found her on care and found the person we had before on there too.
I know people always say “find a local college student” and whatnot but I think a lot of them are on sites like that in my area. And it IS a popular time of day. I’d throw out an ad and see if you get anyone you click with! Especially since I’m there a lot of that time she’s helping us I was able to feel pretty comfortable with a lot of potential candidates if that makes sense.
Couldn’t recommend it more. It’s been good for our marriage because I’m not taking out my exhaustion on my husband and it makes me a better parent because i have the opportunity to focus more on the kids individually (not that it’s necessary, just a bonus!)
Outsourcing says
Thank you! We used Care to find our nanny and she’s amazing, so I’ll start there. Appreciate you sharing how much you pay, too.
anon says
We have paid from eighteen to twenty dollars an hour but we have three kids and the position does require watching them for a while without me home. In my relatively HCOL city that’s what you need for three kids! If I’d gone more mother’s helper route I definitely could have found someone for cheaper but i needed it to be someone I trusted to handle my three kids under 5 on their own until I came home.
Our person right now cooks dinner for the kids and makes enough for me to eat the leftovers. Besides having found her confusing profile on facebook, she is a GEM. Our previous person fed the kids but didn’t cook well/make more for me. But if you really want to hit the jackpot, ask about cooking too! Basically she cooks for and feeds the kids, I come home around when they’re eating and sit down with them, I sit with htem while she tidies up just their dinner stuff. Then she gives the big kids bath while I read to the baby and put her down. Then she heads out and I read books with big kids and put them down.
We are throwing money at childcare a lot right now but it’s a great set-up. This is Monday through Thursday. Friday my husband gets home so he can help so she leaves right when we get home.
Outsourcing says
This sounds ideal. Thank you for sharing all of these details!
ElisaR says
i love my mother’s helper. she has been coming for a year now. she started when she was 13 yrs old. she comes from 5-7 2x a week and it’s SUCH a big help. it took some time for it to become a real help though. We had to get into our groove. I had hired another girl (16 yr old) at first but it wasn’t a good fit. I mention the ages but it’s really about the person you get, not the age. I found my helper through my friend who is a mother of one of her friends–so word of mouth. At first the kids just clung to me and she couldn’t help much but we have gotten past that. I haven’t figured out meal delivery yet. I often order restaurant delivery which isn’t healthy or that good.
Cb says
I think you need to up your cleaning to once a week and increase the number of tasks they do. Can they organize, put away laundry, be there when grocery delivery arrives, do some meal prep?
LadyNFS says
Second this. I am you (almost – not quite third trimester yet). I have housekeeping come 3 days / week and she does all of the things Cb mentions and she cooks. I have groceries delivered and 3 weeknights she has dinner prepared, all laundry done, folded, put away, in addition to regular cleaning, etc. I eat the leftovers the other nights with my toddler. Sometimes I have my nanny stay late during the week as needed but it’s usually for me to work or attend work-related events. I’m loving this idea of a weeknight mother’s helper / additional childcare. When #2 arrives I’m going to look for a Saturday caretaker because DH is often gone on weekends so maybe this could be the same person.
Outsourcing says
Your housekeeper sounds amazing. How did you find her and how much do you pay, if you don’t mind my asking? How long is she typically there for?
LadyNFS says
She comes 3-4 hours / day, 3 days a week and I pay roughly $33 / hour. HCOL city. I tried a few ladies who charged less but their cooking wasn’t as great and they were not as detail-oriented with cleaning if that makes sense, so here she is. She will cook recipes if I leave them, but otherwise the “rule” is basically one protein and one veggie per meal, and it’s her choice how to prepare so I literally do not have to think beyond “what protein and veggies do I want to eat this week?” when I place a grocery delivery. She will tell me if she wants certain ingredients, spices, etc. and if we are running low on anything. She used to go to the grocery store for me but I found that for what I pay her, I’d rather put the funds towards tasks inside my home. I’ve even had her cook more elborate meals for guests and family coming over which have been a hit. I’ve had her bake cupcakes for my daughter’s birthday party. Basically anything in my home that is not my nanny’s responsibility I have her handle (save for handman, maintenance-type stuff), and it has changed my life. I found her on a mom listserve in my community so totally word of mouth. She ended up being a nanny for a woman who also happened to be in my book club. Housekeeper always cleaned on the side for extra money, but was looking for more hours as that family’s childcare needs were reduced so it worked out well. I justify the cost by figuring that my house is constantly cleaned and picked up, and I’d probably spend the same, if not more on take out every night with less healthy options.
Quail says
Yup, I’d say increase the cleaning frequency and add in some other household tasks. And find a great babysitter to have backup care for at least a few hours on the weekends so you can catch up on work or have some time to yourself/go on a day date with your spouse.
CHL says
We have someone who comes 3:30 – 6:30 twice a week and cooks dinner for the kids, prepares our Sunbasket meal, does kids’ laundry and tidies up. She could also do errands but we haven’t needed much of that. She picks kids up from daycare. We found her on a moms listserv in our community and I pay her $16.50 above the table. Sometimes we also use the 8th grader across the street who is very helpful with kids but less so with household stuff.
Anon says
i think your ideas sound spot on. some kind of evening help would probably be very useful. i’ve never tried it, but you could try Freshly for meals where you literally just heat the food up. Also – i personally love going to the grocery store, but so many people swear by grocery delivery or pick up. At this season of life you could just keep things simple and come up with a weekly meal plan that repeats and do things like get a rotisserie chicken + frozen veggies + rice. our grocery store has a lot of pre-made meals. there is also nothing wrong with scrambled eggs or mac and cheese for dinner. I do not know how you currently prep your meals, but right now is not the season to spend time chopping fruits and vegetables
Boston Legal Eagle says
We do Freshly 2x a week and like it. Particularly the part about not having to make dinner for at least part of the week! We (i.e. husband) still do kids’ meals, but that’s one less thing to worry about. We also used to outsource laundry, which included pick-up/drop-off, washing, drying and folding, so you can consider that, OP. A nighttime helper sounds great, get that person for as many nights as you can afford.
GCA says
When I travel for work we have a part-time person doing daycare pickup, dinner and bedtime for two kids from 5-8pm – I found her on care.com. Ours is a teacher in her day job but as long as she knows our needs in advance, she can check her schedule to make sure other afterschool commitments don’t clash. I meal prep on weekends, she just reheats for the kids.
Anonymous says
An au pair? Note that they have some restrictions on caring for infants though.
Anonymous says
I think I’d use a meal delivery service and a laundry service so that all my available time was dedicated to work and my kids rather than any household chores. My feelings on that are partly driven by the fact that a meal delivery service can’t flake on you when they’re sick. I’d also put your infant into daycare at least part-time a month or so before you go back to work so you can get the worst of the daycare illnesses behind you and also get some rest before returning back to work. Also, get your Disney+ subscription now – solo parenting a toddler and a new born is no joke.
Artemis says
I have a ridiculous “fashion” question. A few years ago, Target sold what I’ll call “novelty” underwear for women–cotton/stretch briefs and bikinis with Star Wars, Harry Potter, DC/Marvel characters, Disney characters, etc. I bought tons of them because they were comfy, not granny panties, inexpensive, and they were fun! Everyone else in my house has fun underwear, why not me!
Ever since Target re-branded all of their clothing lines, I cannot find this underwear in any of my local stores or on the Target website, I cannot find them on Amazon (which trends towards expensive/sexy/cosplay versions), and I cannot find them in various other places I thought to look.
Anyone else know where to find these? All my old pairs are wearing out, and I just want to face the day with Wonder Woman backing me up in secret, you know?
Anon Lawyer says
Sounds like the kind of thing Hot Topic would have.
Anon says
Can anyone speak to the quality of Pottery Barn nursery furniture? I have family members that have graciously offered to furnish our nursery and specifically mentioned Pottery Barn. Just wondering if the quality matches the hefty price.
Anonymous says
In my experience, no the quality does not match the price. We have a dresser that looks nice and has held up pretty well so far, but the bookshelves we purchased from them seem no better than Ikea/Target, if not worse. They sag noticeably in the middle. Their customer service is a pain to deal with also.
SC says
Pottery Barn’s customer service is absolutely the worst.
Anon says
i have two cribs (twins) and a dresser and have been quite happy with them so far. another place to look is Crate & Kids, or Restoration Hardware (though it’s even more pricey).
SC says
We have an arm chair/ rocking chair from Pottery Barn that we use in our nursery. The feet switch between rockers and regular feet. We’ve had it for 4 years now, and I feel like it’s great quality.
We also bought Pottery Barn blackout curtains, and they’re also great quality.
We bought a Pottery Barn rug for our nursery. It’s not in great shape. Granted, it’s been through a lot, so maybe it’s not a problem with the rug but just what will happen to anything on the floor of a kid’s room. If I had to do it over again, I’d buy an inexpensive rug and plan to replace it more often.
We did not buy a Pottery Barn crib because of the expense. I’m glad we didn’t spend much money there because Kiddo chewed on the rail of his crib for a few months. The rest of the nursery furniture was stuff we or family members already had.
Govtattymom says
We have the Kendall dresser and crib from Pottery Barn. I have been very happy with both. The dresser is beautifully made (very heavy, nicely constructed drawers, etc.) I also loved the “white glove” delivery service; we didn’t have to assemble plus no assembly is a good sign re quality. The crib is very nice but the quality is not quite as high as the dresser.
Anonymous says
This. Same model; both crib and dresser. I’ve been happy with them, but probably wouldn’t have spent the money if it hadn’t been heavily subsidized by my parents. I am planning to sell both when my second is done with the crib (probably within the next year) and get Ikea for the next step. If I were you, I’d look at buy/sell/trade sites and see if you can find the dresser especially.
Emily S. says
it depends on the specific piece of furniture. I would splurge for a PBK chair or kids furniture (with a coupon) but not a crib. We’ve had two Walmart cribs and now have a PBK twin bed and dresser. It’s fine; it’s one of the least embellished models and I bought it with a 30% discount. I wouldn’t have paid full price because I don’t think it is that quality. My sister tried to convince me to buy a PBK crib like she had, but our kids both chewed on the rail and the gnaw marks looked equally bad on each crib. I was glad I only paid $100 for mine. The PBK rocker/glider she had, though, I was very jealous of!
NYCer says
We have a PBK Emerson crib and dresser (without the changing table – we just use a Keekaroo peanut on top) and have zero complaints about either.
Meg says
We have the midcentury crib and dresser from Pottery Barn/West Elm and are very pretty/functional but probably not worth the price. We would have bought Babyletto, but my MIL really pushed to split a “matching set” with us. Unfortunately the shipping process was a huge headache. The crib’s shipping date shifted later and later and came 1.5 months late, after my son had outgrown his bassinet, which forced us to scramble and get a pack n play in the interim. Customer service did not care AT ALL. But the room looks nice now!
Can’t stop eating! says
I’m on my early second trimester and I am so hungry! I’ve gained more weight than I “should” have by this point, but my doctor doesn’t seem overly concerned. But I seriously could eat three lunches! Anyone have tips for staying full?
shortperson says
eat. you are pregnant and hungry. i gained exactly 47 pounds with both of my pregnancies. apparently that’s what my body needs. the weight comes off.
Anon says
Fwiw, I gained half my weight in the first trimester, so high weight gain in the beginning doesn’t always translate to high weight gain overall. I was a healthy weight to start with and gained within the recommend guidelines overall.
Anonymous says
+1 – sort of – I gained more than I “should” have–50 pounds–but the gain was not linear, and it all came off except about 5-10 pounds within 3 weeks of birth.
Anon says
Eat. I couldn’t eat by my third trimester (acid reflux and a shrinking stomach), and I actually lost weight in the last month.
Just make sure that you’re eating healthy food and getting a LOT of water.
TheElms says
Protein and healthy fats help with making you feel full. Also, make sure you are drinking enough water. Sometimes hunger is really thirst. I was drinking 3L of water a day most of my pregnancy. But if you do all that and you are still hungry just eat. Try and make it somewhat well balanced if possible, but don’t not eat. I had a borderline obese BMI (29) before I got pregnant, gained about 40lbs (the goal was 25 lbs) during pregnancy, had a healthy pregnancy otherwise and healthy baby, and now 8 month later weigh less than I did before getting pregnant. People are just different.
ALC says
I ate lots of peanut butter and apples/bananas at my desk between meals. Also nuts and trail mix were handy to keep around. Finally, drink tons of water. And if your doctor isn’t concerned about weight gain, you shouldn’t be either!
Anon says
Kind of a weird question, but we get daily reports from daycare and they frequently describe my almost 2 year old daughter as an “observer.” A typical note says something like “Susie is an observer in the classroom. She will participate in some activities when asked, but prefers to observe.” I would normally brush it off, but we get comments like this multiple times per week so I feel like maybe they’re (sort of passive-aggressively?) trying to tell us there’s some kind of issue. Also it’s kind of confusing, because whenever I pick her up she seems fully engaged in the class activity, and I have seen her play with other kids, at least as much as 2 year olds play “with” other kids. We had parent teacher conferences just a couple months ago and the teachers raved about her and said they had no concerns about her behavior. I specifically asked about the comments about her always observing and they said that she was pretty reserved when she started daycare but has opened up a lot and is much more engaged now. So…then why are you still talking constantly about her “observing” and refusing to participate in activities? I’m just kind of confused. Would you ignore this, because the teachers aren’t raising any formal concerns? Or talk to them about it?
IHeartBacon says
I would ignore it. “Prefers to observe” is not an accusation. You say that during your conversations with her teachers, they raved about her and they had no concerns about her behavior and that she has opened up a lot since starting daycare. I would give more weight to that in-person conversation than to a scribbled note that you get at the end of the day. Also, it can be true that she is “much more engaged now” while at the same time she still “prefers to observe.” The way of describing your daughter as an observer just sounds like they’re describing her personality, rather than suggesting there is something wrong with how she is behaving.
Anonymous says
I don’t know for daycare, but my 6 y/o is totally the Observer in her class and always has been. She’s perfectly social! She will also come home and tell me every last thing that happened at school.
I used to be concerned bc she would tell me she sits on the bench and watches kids play at recess…but it turns out it is only occasionally and the other 90% of the time she’s off playing. She’s an introvert and she likes people watching.