This post may contain affiliate links and CorporetteMoms may earn commissions for purchases made through links in this post. As an Amazon Associate, I earn from qualifying purchases.
My husband and I just came back from our vacation in Key West (without the baby — woo!). Before going, I geared myself to eat a MINIMUM of one slice of key lime pie per day. On the first day there, I found they sold key lime pie slices dipped in chocolate on a stick. Come on! They were as good as they sound, and I’ll confess I sometimes ate two in one day. YOLO. Googling around, I found this company, Goldbelly, that can ship them frozen to my house. This would be my holiday treat to myself, but perusing the website, I can see that this site has a ton of fun ideas for gift giving, client gift giving, or hostess gifts. (Their tagline is “The Best Gourmet Food, Food Gifts & Mail Order Foods Shipped Nationwide.”) I can guarantee that you’ll be hungry just by clicking this site! My choice is Kermit’s Key West Key Lime Shoppe, but I am sure you’ll see something that will tempt you. Key Lime Pie on a Stick
AwayEmily says
People with more flying-with-kids experience, please reassure me. I just checked in for our cross-country flight tomorrow and they assigned our family of four (including one lap infant) two seats next to each other and then …a middle seat, halfway across the plane. This is very far from ideal — I am low-level panicking at the idea of dealing with a squirmy 11-month-old ALONE in a middle seat (and I especially don’t want to nurse him in a middle seat).
Based on your experience, will the people working at the gate take pity on us and move someone around so we can all be next to each other? It is definitely a full flight.
Anon says
In all honesty, maybe not. Gate agents have been less than helpful at the stuff for me lately. You might be able to ask someone to switch with you, but it’s hard if your seats aren’t physically close together. And you’d have to offer someone at least an equal trade – no one is going to give up an aisle/window for a middle and it sounds like you have two middle seats and one aisle or window seat, so getting someone to trade with you so you can sit with the rest of your family will be difficult.
I’ve nursed a baby in a middle seat before (with strangers on either side). It’s not that big a deal. Also you can walk around the plane whenever the seatbelt sign is off, so you can definitely bring him to your husband to hold for a while (or you and husband can switch seats, he can sit with the baby and you can sit with your older child). I don’t think it will be the greatest flight ever, but you’ll survive.
Cb says
Ugh, that’s terrible. How long is the flight? You’ll probably want to nurse during takeoff so I’d have your husband take the solo middle seat and you manage take-off with the toddler.
But I’d definitely appeal for pity from the passenger sitting next to you. They don’t want you climbing over them the whole time.
Anon says
Babies ears usually aren’t bothered on takeoff, just on landing. It’s important to me to have my child restrained in a carseat during takeoff and landing for safety reasons and it hasn’t been a problem. Takeoff is fast, so I usually nurse her about 5-10 minutes into the flight once the seatbelt sign goes off. For landing, I nurse during the early stages of descent and don’t stow in her carseat until the landing gear goes on (when they make the “flight attendants take your seats for landing” announcement). Apparently a lot of the pressure changes happen early in the landing stages, so you don’t have to nurse until the plane is on the ground to get the benefits of nursing. TL;DR if you can’t nurse during takeoff it will be fine. That said, I’d take the baby yourself just in case he throws a fit and wants to nurse. Let your husband manage the older child. I think you’re better off alone with the baby in a middle seat vs trying to take both kids alone, even if taking both kids would get you a window seat.
A says
We had a similar seat assignment for our Thanksgiving flight, and we got it sorted out with the gate agents. I think they are generally pretty willing to work with you, and, if nothing else, the person who you’d be switching seats with will probably be happier not sitting next to small children (at least, that has been my experience).
Good luck! Flights with little kids are no picnic, but it will be over soon.
Anon says
What does the seat map look like when you check in? Are there still premium economy seats left that you can pay for? If so, then there’s a pretty good chance the gate agent will be able to work with you, but to the above commenter’s point, sometimes on a full flight their hands are tied. I would seriously consider paying for an upgraded aisle seat if they have any available in a row closer to where your husband will be sitting, and then it will also be easier for you to walk back and forth and swap kids if/when necessary.
Anonymous says
And if you want to all sit together, you have a better chance of getting someone to swap for an aisle than a middle.
Anon says
It sounds like they have middle and aisle together and middle somewhere else in the plane. The only way they can sit together is if they get someone to take the isolated middle seat, so OP can take the window near the aisle + middle they already have. And I agree, odds of that happening are not great. Nobody who has reserved (and possibly paid for) an aisle will want to give it up in exchange for a middle.
11:16 Anon says
Like I said, if OP upgrades the isolated middle to an isolated aisle as the previous poster suggested, they’d have a lot better chance of getting someone to switch to the upgraded isolated aisle.
AnotherAnon says
When I flew home without DH the day after Thanksgiving with my 21 m/o, the gate agent did take pity on me and moved me up from the back of the plane (I had chosen to sit at the back of the plane but still appreciated the gesture). So maybe they will take pity on you. You could also always politely ask if they will shuffle someone around so you can sit closer. I’ve also had some luck simply asking the person in the aisle across if they would switch with me. That actually works most of the time now that I think about it. Good luck! Hope you have a good trip.
Anonymous says
The last time this happened to us, the gate agents just told us to ask people around us to switch, which was less than what I hoped for. We had 3 solo seats spread around the plane, one of which was for our 5 year old son. But we did find someone who would switch. Worst case scenario, I would keep both kids with 1 parent and take turns sitting alone in the middle seat. (ALONE! IN PEACE!). If you move around enough people may decide to switch with you anyway.
Anonanonanon says
I get not sitting parents together, but I’ve never had a problem getting them to move my child to be next to one of us! That’s crazy!
lawsuited says
Seriously. What airline was this? (So that I never book with them.)
Anonymous says
IIRC I think I had probably picked those seats – I believe there were no seats left together when I booked the ticket, at least without paying an upcharge. I am terminally cheap and didn’t expect the airline to be so unhelpful. It was probably Delta but I’m not sure.
Anon says
Why did you book the tickets if you knew you couldn’t sit together? I don’t understand this at all.
Anon says
I would call and try to get the issue fixed ahead of time. Pay extra for economy plus if you have to. Anymore, people who have aisle seats often paid extra to get them, so I don’t think you can show up on the plane and expect that someone will give you the seat that they reserved and paid for in exchange for a middle.
Ugh, sorry this sucks. I’ve started only booking flights if I can reserve my seats at booking for this reason. If seats together aren’t available, I take another flight.
Anonymous says
Agree. The price of seats is so unique. That’s why gate agents are hesitant to switch people. It’s annoying.
octagon says
I am a terrible person but the only time this happened to us (three middle seats, all rows apart) I just stuck my 3-year-old in the middle seat and after he screamed for 5 minutes one of the people next to him volunteered to switch.
anon says
you are not a terrible person. this is a horrendous policy! a 3 year old clearly cannot sit alone on a plane
Anon says
You aren’t a horrible person, but I also don’t think this is totally fair. If only single seats were available when you booked, you should have taken a different flight.
Anon says
I agree. You get the seats you selected when you bought the ticket. If those seats aren’t acceptable (eg because they’d require a young child to sit alone), you take a different flight. Selecting a terrible/unacceptable seat and then demanding the airline give you a better seat is not ok.
Anon says
I agree and would add that forcing someone to switch with you is even worse than demanding the airline give you a better seat. To me, that is just taking advantage. When people do this, it causes kindness-fatigue among regular travelers and makes people less likely to help when someone (like OP) needs it for reasons not of their own making.
Walnut says
Gate agents have always moved us. Alaska even accommodated happily when I was super late to the gate and basically the last person on the plane. The other times I’ve requested with plenty of time prior to boarding.
Anon says
This is changing in the last year or so though. American, United and Delta now sell aisle and window seats for a premium. If someone has paid for an aisle or window, there’s no way the airline will take that away from them and move them to a middle.
https://thepointsguy.com/2017/10/blocked-window-and-aisle-seats/
K. says
In addition, there was recently an article I read somewhere that airlines are now intentionally splitting up families in hopes that they pay extra fees to sit together. These are new policies. It’s a horrible practice. But, I would bet that attendants are going to be less helpful in moving people than they were in the past because of it.
Anon in NYC says
I would have very low expectations from the gate agents and/or fellow passengers. I think you should call the airline now and see if they can move your family around.
Anon says
And expect to pay. Airlines sell these seats for a premium now,and you can’t expect an aisle or window unless you’re willing to pay a surcharge.
Anonymous says
My pregnant self paid $ for the aisle so that no middle or aisle person has to have me and my 15-minute bladder hop over them multiple times during the flight. So I’m usually friendly to all flyers, but I am not in a good position to switch with you.
BUT one time an airline ticketed my baby daughter (travelling in a car seat) in an exit row. I get that it’s usually a benefit, but she wasn’t eligible AND since I got her her own seat, they also knew how old she was. THAT seat I did get a taker for so she could sit next to me in a non-exit row.
Just spend the $ to get the seats you need. You can’t do a Blanche DuBois and rely on the kindness of strangers any busy flying time anymore.
lawsuited says
If you can solve this problem by paying for an upgrade, do that. Sitting in the middle seat (and nursing!) a crawler/walker lap infant will be rough.
If there’s no way to upgrade, then ask the gate staff and the flight staff to help. A similar thing happened to us and once the doors were closed and flight attendants had the lay of the land the flight attendants asked some people to move around so we could sit together. I was very pregnant and our baby was dressed cutely and charming the pants off the fellow passengers so people were nice about moving, but I don’t know whether cranky holiday travellers will be as kind.
AwayEmily says
Thanks, all. This is depressing but it’s good to know what I’m walking into. I’m going to call to see if I can get them to switch it ahead of time (the 5-hour flight where this is a problem is actually the second leg of our trip so so we’ll be scrambling to make our connection, and I’m not sure I’ll have much time to confer with the gate agent).
I’m pretty sure I could nurse an infant in a middle seat but I’m honestly not confident about my ability to nurse a tall, wiggly, easily distracted 11-month-old.
Another thing I thought of — bringing some cash and offering whoever is in the window seat to switch to my child-free middle seat. That way the switcher gets not only the feeling of having done something nice, but also a trip where they don’t have to sit next to two babies AND $50. Seems like a pretty good deal!
Anonymous says
Can you upgrade to economy plus or similar?
AwayEmily says
At least according to the website, economy plus seats together aren’t available either (if they were I definitely would have snagged them!). Seems like a full flight; when I checked in I got a notification that they were looking for people to take vouchers in order to be switched to a later one.
AwayEmily says
Oh, and I really liked the idea of upgrading the single seat to be more attractive to potential traders, but they didn’t even have any economy plus SINGLE seats left. I guess everyone wants to go to Phoenix tomorrow…
Anon says
I think you should switch to a later flight where you can sit together, if at all possible.
AwayEmily says
good thought, I did look into that, but it would mean flying on Christmas Eve (we do not live in a hub so there aren’t a lot of flight options).
Anon says
I’m trying to figure out how to say this deliciately so I don’t get attacked – but as someone who often travels alone for business, I think it’s our responsibility as parents to make sure when we book tickets that we are getting seats together with our families. I’ve started paying extra for the exit row when I travel alone just so I don’t get suckered into switching for a middle seat, again (I’m 6 feet tall so a middle is pretty miserable for me, but I also hate to turn down another parent in need.)
Anon says
Yup. I flat out won’t switch. I reserve myself a window. If some parent asked me to take a middle so they could sit with their kids, I’d say no. Middle seats suck and I dont want to switch just because a family couldn’t pay for it reserve seats together. (I also have kids and fly with them a ton, fwiw).
AwayEmily says
I think that is totally fair. I did book us all seats together when I bought the ticket, but the airline opted not to honor them — if I had to guess, it’s because I booked using miles rather than directly from the airline.
AwayEmily says
Also, I would never be annoyed with someone who didn’t want to switch. Someone might be scared of flying and so really need that window seat, or have a chronic health condition that means they need easy access to the bathroom. Or maybe someone just flat-out doesn’t want to, and that’s fine too! I always switch when someone asks me to, even to a middle seat, because I’m lucky enough not to have any of those issues (plus I am short), but I don’t have any expectations of other people. You do you.
Anonymous says
This is a much different scenario. Call the airline now.
Also, never fly these airlines. JetBlue and southwest have my business now for work because they are so much better for family travel (where I burn my work miles).
Anon says
Oh I think it’s a bit different if the airline switched you. I’d push back hard on the airline. Call them. They may have to bump someone to a premium cabin, but they can and should do that, since it was their mistake.
Anon says
Oh, it’s 100% different if you booked together and the airline switched you. In that case, I’d call now and explain that your 3 year old cannot sit alone. Make yourself as annoying as you can ahead of time until they fix the problem – after all, they created this problem, not you.
AwayEmily says
Update: I called the airline to say “uh…you moved us so we are not sitting next to each other any more, can you fix it?” They were sympathetic/apologetic but did not actually give us new seats — BUT they promised that they made a note in our file and that the gate agent would reassign us so that we could sit together. Who knows if this will actually pan out.
Thanks everyone for your advice. I really appreciate it.
Good Morning to Me says
I was on a rare early morning work call from home this morning, and DH decided to go for a run and forgot to disarm the alarm system. I had to end my call to deal with a whooping alarm, a screaming baby, a barking dog and a call from the alarm company wondering if they should send the police. At least it’s Friday….
Anonymous says
Yes, alarm company, please send police. The perp is currently running away and [describe husband].
Kidding, of course. My husband would never get to live that one down.
Anon says
I worked until 1:30, was up with my 16 month old from 4:30-6 (early 2Y molar teething – she normally sleeps through until 9), managed to nap from 6-8:30, and somehow had 30+ emails before I made it out of the shower. I so, so, so hate year end. Here’s hoping we sign some deals today so that I can enjoy Christmas.
Anonanonanon says
Oh man. I loooooove Key Lime Pie but am definitely not a fan of mixing citrus and chocolate, so this would not be my jam. This website looks cool, though!
Aaaaaand I just shipped my parents a cake!
Anon says
What’s the etiquette for taking kids to a play date when they have a bit of a cold?
Anon says
Ask the other parents?
Anonymous says
If there is no fever, I would go. I’ll often text the mom (or other adult attending), “Just an FYI, Kiddo has a bit of a cold. No fever, and it hasn’t slowed her down. We’re still planning on the playdate, but I wanted to let you know in case you’d prefer to reschedule.”
9 times out of 10 this time of year, the response is “Us too. See you later.”
Spirograph says
“[my kid] is looking forward to playing with [your kid] later, but I want to warn you he has a bit of a cold. Just a runny nose and a little cough, no fever or anything! I understand if you’d rather avoid the germs. Do you still want us to come?”
It gives them an out if they’re having second thoughts for germs or any other reason, and makes sure I don’t look like a jerk for bringing over a snot-nosed kid. 90% of the time, play date continues as planned.
anon says
OP here: what if it is a group playdate? we are supposed to go to a playgroup with the kids from our baby class, so it would be hard for me to text all of the other parents (otherwise I would definitely do that)
Anonymous says
Is it in someone’s home? If so, I would text the host. If it is not in a home, I’d just go if there is no fever. I tend to follow daycare rules for this stuff provided kiddo feels like participating.
AIMS says
Maybe I am the outlier but I hate when other people don’t give me a heads up about colds and then I have to deal with a sick kid (esp. over the holidays). Fever or no fever, if you’re contagious I’d rather reschedule. I will say that a lot of times when I do give a heads up the other parent doesn’t care so maybe it’s just me.
11:19 Anon says
That’s totally fair. I just feel like with kiddo (and kiddos we have playdates with) going to daycare, it’s a lost cause. :-/
SC says
I think it’s best to give a heads’ up. I usually take the approach of, “Well, they’re exposed to so many germs anyways.” But there are many legitimate reasons a parent might want to reschedule or not take their kid to the playdate, ranging from a family member or close relative is immuno-compromised to inconvenient timing for getting sick (for example, holiday travel coming up, end of year and no sick leave left, just recovered from the stomach bug and want a break before the next round of illness).
Spirograph says
For a group playdate, I’d factor in a few things:
– How old is the kid? If we’re talking about mobile baby/toddler and likely shared slobber on toys, I might be more inclined to keep him home. For babies that still just lay around in the vicinity of other babies, or kids past the phase of putting everything in their mouths, I’d go.
– Is everyone in daycare? half the daycare has a runny nose in the winter at any given time, so meh
– Location. In a public place, definitely go. In a home, I agree with Anonymous above to check with the host
– The parents. If you know there are a couple of them who always err on the side of avoiding germs, stay home.
GCA says
All of this!
How did you organize the group playdate? Could you use that channel to notify the other parents?
Plus: If the other kid/s go to the same daycare as mine, I figure they are sharing germs anyway. If the exposure would happen anyway (eg daycare/ preschool/ church) I bring kiddo.
Anna says
Don’t take a sick kid to a play date four days before Christmas!!
Anon says
I agree, I’d factor in the holiday and say no to this one. Sick kids on Christmas are such a bummer.
Anonymous says
Another travel question! My BFF is having a baby (yay!) but she lives in Hong Kong…I obviously want to go see her and baby, probably a few months after baby is born. But I have a baby (really a toddler) myself and am not comfortable leaving her for the 5 days minimum required for such a trip. So, that leaves options of either not going or taking a nearly-2-year-old on a 15 hour flight. We would go direct. Is this an absolutely insane idea? The long flight plus jet lag is not at all appealing to me but neither is missing out on my BFF’s baby or leaving my own kid for that long.
Anon says
It’s not insane at all to take your child. I’ve taken my toddler on several longhaul flights, inculding once to Asia from the East Coast of the US. By 2, they can probably be entertained by screens and if you buy them their own seat they’ll probably sleep a lot. Babies adjust to new time zones super quickly and jetlag is much less of an issue for babies/kids than it is for adults.
DO IT. Even if the flights are h*ll (which they hopefully won’t be), the trip itself will be incredible. You’ll be so glad you visited your BFF’s baby and your child is old enough to get something out of the trip too.
anon says
Just as a counterpoint, I took my 17 month old to Asia and he didn’t adjust to the time zones at all. But I would still do it, because it’s not like your BFF will be sleeping all that much :). Definitely get them their own seat if you can afford it.
Anonymous says
I have 3 kids and 2/3 were entertained by screens at 2. The other only mildly so starting at 3 and also gets airsick. Wheeeee!
GCA says
We travel from the East Coast to Asia with kid regularly for family visits. It’s not too crazy to take your child, as long as you budget some time to get over jet lag. And Hong Kong, while a little cramped, is not the worst city for toddlers. Bring a soft structured baby carrier or backpack-style kid carrier, eat all the things, go to Hong Kong Disneyland, and ride the Peak Tram and Mid-Levels escalator. Resign yourself to being hot and sweaty or rained-on. (Bring an umbrella and lots of changes of clothes.) Your BFF will be delighted to spend time with you!
Paging Mama Llama says
Thank you so much for your comment yesterday “we are all doing what we can within our own constraints and priorities.” I’m still within my first year of motherhood and finding it SO much harder than I ever anticipated and I realize I have it easy compared to many others. I have a low stress job with very normal hours and an easy commute and we have a nanny, which means there is less prep than daycare, and honestly reading this blog often makes me feel totally inept since many of you have “big” jobs or spouses that travel more than mine does or are single parents or wake up each day to go for a 5 mile run before work. I also realize that i am so so privileged and there are people out there who are working 2-3 jobs to provide for their families and do not have the funds to outsource anything and i honestly do not know how those people do it because I am already exhausted all the time, collapse into bed each night and feel like i have no downtime. i really do need to remind myself that it is not a contest and it doesn’t make me a weak person or a failure because i find it hard. it is ok that i need 7-8 hours of sleep to function, do not have the energy to workout every day or cook gourmet meals or meditate daily.
Mama Llama says
Aw, thanks for posting this! I’m 4 years into my parenting gig and far from an expert, but I feel confident in saying that comparison is a losing proposition. Avoiding it can be a discipline, especially with social media, but it’s worth it to keeping reminding yourself that things that are hard for you are hard for you and things that work for you work for you no matter what anyone else is doing. (E.g., we will never be a family that goes to the pumpkin patch and posts cute pictures. Sometimes I would like to be that family, but for various reasons we are not and never will be. And that’s ok.) This is really hard, and I’m sure you are doing a great job. :)
Anonymous says
I loved that comment yesterday, too.
OP, the first year is hard! My husband and I look back and laugh at ourselves for how difficult we thought everything was back then. Compared to the craziness that is life now, it was so simple! We only had one kid, we had jobs with less responsibility, fewer hours, a nanny instead of daycare… But when you’re in the thick of figuring out life as a parent, it can be overwhelming.
For me (full acknowledgement that I was and still am very fortunate), I didn’t have to think about significant trade-offs in my life before I had kids. As an adult I always had plenty of time for work, significant other, friends, hobbies, exercise, and enough money to do what I wanted. Throw a baby in the mix, though, and suddenly the whole calculus changed: saying yes to one thing meant saying no to something else. The mental shift from “I can do this AND this” to needing to prioritize and be OK letting some things go was tough, and frankly something I”m always working on. I think most of us have been there. It does get easier, though!
One of the best things I did for myself was get completely off social media. I like this s1te because y’all are realistic, supportive, and have ideas I can try on. Social media is a highlight reel that doesn’t show trade-offs or the meltdown that happened 30 seconds after the picture of smiling kids was taken, and just makes me feel like I’m coming up short. I don’t have time for that.
heart-shaped says
Anyone have experience with low-lying placenta relatively early on? At my 16 week scan, the Dr. noted that it’s covering the cervix, but wasn’t concerned since I guess they often move up on their own. I just am very prone to worrying and had such a great vaginal birth experience with my son that I’d love to have the chance to try it again this time. Anyone been there? Any words of encouragement?
Anon says
I’m 16 weeks along and also have a low-lying placenta. It was touching my cervix at my 8 week ultrasound, they checked it again at 13 weeks and it was still low but moving in the right direction. My understanding is that having a low placenta this early almost always resolves itself because it tends to move as your uterus grows. I’m not sweating it and encourage you not to either! Though the exercise and sex restrictions I have been put on suck. I’m hoping it will be resolved at my next appointment.
Anon says
It’s pretty common and almost always resolves. It’s way too early to worry. My BFF had this well into her third trimester and had no issues having a v-birth when she went into labor naturally at 39 weeks.
Anonymous says
I had one in one of my pregnancies. It moved by 18 weeks.
anon says
Same. Mine moved by 30 weeks, which is when they checked again.
Anonymous says
Yes. Mine was on the front (tummy) side and those usually move up (mine did). The ones on the side of your back may be different. Mine bled once (scary!) but gave me no trouble after that. Had a regular v-delivery.
AIMS says
Totally frivolous question for a slow Friday: is there any meaningful difference between UGG and ugg-like boots for little kids? Grandma wants to buy my 3 year old some warm winter boots as a present and she suggested UGGs but I’m wondering if Bearpaw or Emu or whatever would be just as fine? It’s a gift so I’m happy to let her decide, just curious if anyone has found there to be a difference. Thanks!
Anonymous says
We have some Cat and Jack’s that are holding up very well.
anon says
I’ve never had UGGs, but I’ve had various knockoffs and they are fine. Especially since they outgrow them every two days.
Anonymous says
Late response but thought I’d chime in- Quality-wise yes, but consider the age of your child and how hard they wear their shoes. Mine don’t wear their shoes very hard and outgrow things quickly so I opted for the cheapo trendy knockoffs for $20. Huge quality difference but we won’t get much wear out of them. There are also some good in between brands where the quality is great they just don’t have the Ugg name