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This kind of face covering has been intriguing me lately. I like the idea of being able to wear it multiple ways — bandana, face covering, and headband.
I can see it coming in handy when you have your own office but still need to interact with people in the larger office. It would be easy to wear around your neck as a bandana and then pull it up and tie it around the back of your head when venturing out to the copy machine or the restroom.
For someone who is absentminded like me and has difficulty keeping track of things like a phone or keys, the “Where’s my mask?!” panic is an emotion I’m becoming all too familiar with. If it stays around my neck, I can’t lose it.
This bandana from Dolan is $30 at shopdolan.com. Infinity Bandana
Sales of note for 4.18.24
(See all of the latest workwear sales at Corporette!)
- Ann Taylor – 50% off full-price dresses, jackets & shoes; $30 off pants & skirts; extra 50% off sale styles
- Banana Republic Factory – Up to 50% off everything; extra 20% off purchase
- Eloquii – 50% off select styles; 60% off swim; up to 40% off everything else
- J.Crew – Mid-Season Sale: Extra 60% off sale styles; up to 50% off spring-to-summer styles
- Lands’ End – 30% off full-price styles
- Loft – Spring Mid-Season Sale: Up to 50% off 100s of styles
- Nordstrom: Free 2-day shipping for a limited time (eligible items)
- Talbots – Spring Sale: 40% off + extra 15% off all markdowns; 30% off new T by Talbots
- Zappos – 29,000+ women’s sale items! (check out these reader-favorite workwear brands on sale, and some of our favorite kids’ shoe brands on sale)
Kid/Family Sales
- Carter’s – Up to 70% off baby items; 50% off toddler & kid deals & 40% off everything else
- Hanna Andersson – Up to 50% off spring faves; 25% off new arrivals; up to 30% off spring
- J.Crew Crewcuts – Up to 60% off sale styles; up to 50% off kids’ spring-to-summer styles
- Old Navy – 30% off your purchase; up to 75% off clearance
- Target – Car Seat Trade-In Event (ends 4/27); BOGO 25% off select skincare products; up to 40% off indoor furniture; up to 20% off laptops & printers
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And — here are some of our latest threadjacks of interest – working mom questions asked by the commenters!
- If you’re a working parent of an infant with low sleep needs, how do you function at work when you’re in the throes of baby’s sleep regression?
- Should I cut my childcare down to 12 hours a month if I work from home?
- Will my baby have speech delays if we raise her bilingual?
- Has anyone given birth in a teaching hospital?
- My child eats everything, and my friends’ kids do not – how should I handle? In general, what is the best way to handle when your child has some skill/ability and your friend’s child doesn’t have that skill/ability?
- ADHD moms, give me your tips to help with things like behavior in the classroom, attention to detail, etc?
- I think I suffer from mom rage…
- My husband and kids are gone this weekend – how should I enjoy my free time?
- I’m struggling to be compassionate with a SAHM friend who complains she doesn’t have enough hours of childcare.
- If you exclusively formula fed, what tips do you have for in the hospital and coming home?
- Could I take my 4-yo and 8-yo on a 7-8 day trip to Paris, Lyon, and Madrid?
Phone Case says
I’m looking for a replacement phone case. I’ve had my old beloved Lodis one for 8 years, but it doesn’t fit my iPhone XR and they don’t appear to be making anything similar anymore. Things I love about my old case:
1. The phone slid into a pocket and was kept in place by a snap. I don’t like having a case attached all the time.
2. It was small and very low profile – other than the phone pocket, it had a small zip side pocket and a small card case.
3. It had a small wristlet strap.
4. It came in a bright color so I wouldn’t lose it.
Any one seen anything like this lately? Thanks!
Coach Laura says
I only carry a crossbody cell phone case (instead of a purse) and I get IG ads all the time for Bandolier phone cases. Many are crossbody but if you go to their site, you can select wristlet you’ll see options. I think you buy the case you want and add a wrist strap. Then you could wear the crossbody if you ever needed it.
OP says
Thank you!
TheElms says
Bandannas are the least effective form of “mask”; perhaps this is better than a traditional triangle shaped mask but it is really not that hard to remember an actual mask.
anon says
Yeah…I’m not in my office that often but I really don’t find it hard to remember to grab my mask off my desk before I venture out to the bathroom.
I do think something like this is useful for hiking/walking where you’re mostly alone, but occasionally pass by other people want a easy face covering to use then.
Anonymous says
What do you mean by “a traditional triangle shaped mask”?
TheElms says
typo – traditional triangle shaped bandana
Anonymous says
Okay, cool. Sorry – I thought you were talking about the masks that kind of triangle over the nose and thought I had missed something about their effectiveness. Thank you!
AIMS says
I think this style is very useful for going for a walk outdoors. If I can stay away from people but they occasionally pass me by, this style is great for pulling up for those brief moments (vs wearing a mask under your chin or carrying it in your hand).
strollerstrike says
That’s true, I think I will bring a scarf along for those outings from now on!! Thanks!
No Face says
This is a good idea. I went on a hike and had to get my mask from out of my pockets when I passed people. I will take my neck gaiter next time!
Anonymous says
A friend from HS who I am friends with on FB has a son who is quite asthmatic. They are very pro-mask, and her son has been wearing masks at summer school. I recently saw her mention that sometimes when they’re out in public, he’ll wear a gaiter (which seems to provide more of a barrier at the bottom than a bandana since gaiters are closed at the bottom while bandanas are open) becuase it is much easier for him to breathe, but they still feel like they’re offering some protection. I thought her comment was interesting. I’ve seen other moms strongly against masks for their asthmatic kids. I don’t know what the right answer is for asthma. Anyone have knowledge? But if it is a problem, a gaiter or bandana may be a compromise in those situations.
Anonymous says
If a child’s asthma is so bad that he cannot wear a mask, then he needs to be kept in isolation at home:
https://community.aafa.org/blog/what-people-with-asthma-need-to-know-about-face-masks-and-coverings-during-the-covid-19-pandemic
EB0220 says
We have some of these that we use for hiking and biking. If we are going somewhere with people we use a regular multi-layer mask but this one is great for leaving down around your neck and just pulling up when you pass someone.
Clementine says
It’s great for running and other outdoor activities where it’s unlikely but possible you’ll have a brief encounter with others.
I also have found great success in my 4 year old wearing one as he can easily put it on (properly) and take it off himself, he is happy to wear it, he will keep it around his neck and if we encounter others (e.g., walking on a nature trail) he is good about pulling it up. Is it perfect? No. But I made several others for my 2 and 4 year old to wear because any compliance is better than no compliance.
mascot says
We got some for our kid that have a filter pocket (so 2 layers without filter). So he gets the better protection plus the convenience. School starts next week so we will see what his preference ends up being.
TheElms says
Totally think its fine for kids or other folks with special needs/medical reasons that might no be able to wear a mask because everyone is right that a mask of any kind is better than no mask. But if you’re a healthy adult in an office with other people, you really should wear a mask, not a bandanna. It is hard to remember at first, but no one will get better remembering unless they practice.
Anonymous says
These have been super useful for me to wear constantly so I always have it – walking to the printer at the office, picking up my daughter at daycare (which is all outside like a drive-thru), getting Starbucks at a drive-thru, etc. If I actually am grocery shopping or at a doctor’s appointment, I wear a real mask.
Coach Laura says
I bought a six-pack of these stretchy buffs back in March from amazon for $10. Mine are knit material and have a bandanna print. I keep them in my car and purse for emergencies. I’m high risk so I like having extra.
I also wear one whenever I walk in a park with my dogs, because I’ve had people run up to me chasing their dogs and they don’t have a mask on. I don’t wear a mask the whole walk (because it’s summer and hot) but it is a good back up.
Similarly, I wear it when biking in case I get too close to someone.
I also read an NPR article about a scientific study that said wearing a layer like this over a cloth mask or surgical mask will up the performance and barrier protection of the cloth mask, because cloth masks let in so much air around the nose and sides. So sometimes I do wear my bandanna buff over another mask for extra safety. https://www.npr.org/sections/goatsandsoda/2020/04/22/840146830/adding-a-nylon-stocking-layer-could-boost-protection-from-cloth-masks-study-find
strollerstrike says
We are close to being done with breastfeeding, only the “reunion feed” after I bring him home from daycare left.
I am so over my nursing bras.
How long do b oo bs take to settle into their new size/shape after weaning? I don’t want to buy a bunch of new bras only to need new ones again in a few months.
Anon says
A long time! I last nursed my daughter a year ago and I swear they’re still changing.
Audrey III says
I stopped BFing #2 a year and a half ago. They started looking less deflated only a couple months ago. I still bought a couple of new bras in the interim to make me feel better; I think I’m comfortable enough now that they’re set (we’re done) to fill out my collection.
Anonymous says
How recently were you breastfeeding at full force? It didn’t take me long, but I breastfed at morning/bedtime until 2.5 and at night only unitl 2.75. So the girls were back to being pretty small by that point. If you only recently stopped feeding fulltime, you might have longer to go. But, remember, cheap Target non-nursing bras for 2-3 months are better than nursing bras. I’d be tempted to get just a couple inexpensive ones at your current size and then in 3 months or so, get nicer ones.
Anon says
After a couple weeks I was able to fit into the bigger bras I bough to wear while pregnant. It’s been over a month since I weaned and I’m still changing though.
AIMS says
I think it depends on how much they changed to begin with. Mine stayed fairly consistent throughout with the exception of one day when my milk first came in.
Ugh. says
Our 6 year old had a cavity in a molar treated with silver diamine fluoride 2 years ago. Everything looked good through his last dental visit last summer. We missed his last appointment due to birth of a baby, then covid hit, and we took him back yesterday and found out he needs a baby root canal. Obviously we are crushed and beating ourselves up for missing that last appointment because it’s possible we could have avoided this. The dentist and hygienist praised his brushing and flossing habits because all other teeth look great, but this is just so disappointing and I feel like a complete failure as a parent. He has never complained about pain or anything, so I’m hopeful that this is going to have good results. Nevertheless, this sucks.
Learn from me: no matter how busy you are, please don’t skip these routine dental visits. Thank you.
Boston Legal Eagle says
I’m sorry. I wouldn’t blame yourself – some kids are just prone to more cavities than others. I’m wondering why they’re doing a root canal on a baby tooth though – can’t they just pull it? Or does it impact the adult tooth underneath?
OP says
Good question, we asked about this.
First of all, apparently a baby root canal is apparently nothing like an adult tooth root canal. It’s over in 10-15 minutes, start to finish.
Secondly, the dentist said that maintaining the baby molar for as long as possible is key to help adult tooth growth underneath — something about correct positioning of the adult tooth as it’s coming in. They may remove the tooth if it’s too damaged (they didn’t think that was the case, but it’s possible), and if they do that, it’s likely orthodontic work will be needed to make sure the tooth is positioned correctly.
ElisaR says
oh man, a baby root canal? i didn’t even know that was a thing…. if its any consolation we skipped our latest appointment due to corona too.
Anon says
Aww, that stinks. If it helps, I’ve had an adult root canal and never had any pain. I only knew I needed it because I developed an abscess.
Mary Moo Cow says
I’ve been in a similar situation — I felt like an abject failure when the dentist told me our 3 year old had a giant cavity in a baby molar. Turns out, her tooth probably descended with a hole in it, so all the brushing in the world wouldn’t have helped — do you have a similar silver lining? Or was your dentist office closed at all during COVID (ours was) to make you feel better?
Good luck with the procedure!
OP says
He didn’t say but my guess is that it’s a combo of not being checked in a year and the SDF not completely arresting decay. I’m not sure how the original cavity showed up but he was late to quit nursing for comfort (like age 2) so it’s likely I set him up for this back then. Ugh.
Anonymous says
Your nursing did not set him up for this. Our pediatric dentist was very supportive of our nursing relationship through any age. I weaned becuase I wanted to at 2.75. Children are designed to nurse, teeth and all.
Seriously, this was probably a fluke and likely a random defect in that one tooth if all the other teeth are so healthy. For example, I was born without enamel on my baby teeth. I had tons of dental work as a child.
Anonymous says
Nursing until 2 is recommended by the WHO. Stop blaming yourself. This is not that big a deal.
Anon says
Um, I think I’m a bad mom because this happened to my 5 year old and it didn’t register as a big emotional event.
Anon says
I don’t think that makes you a bad mom at all. Kids take their emotional cues from their parents. If you think it’s no big deal, it’s more likely your kid will too, and that will be easier for everyone.
anon says
Our school district released #s for how many families are choosing the remote learning option, and I’m surprised by the results. The higher the SES of the school, the fewer kids doing the remote option. If anything, I thought the schools in the wealthier areas would have more kids doing remote because they’re more likely to have a stay-at-home parent and access to better technology. But no — the higher #s are actually at the Title I schools. Is it because the covid rates are higher in those communities? It’s not entirely clear but plausible. Overall, only 16% of the district is choosing the virtual option. The prevailing wisdom was that at least 25% of the district would choose virtual. I’m not sure what the takeaway is, other than the extremes on both ends are the extremely vocal ones? Or more people are homeschooling instead of using the remote learning option?
Anonymous says
What’s the bus situation? Our district is not providing transportation, which means that low-SES families are more likely to be forced into remote learning.
Anon says
My immediate thought is that higher SES means it’s more likely both parents work and need to have the time and space to do that, so they are more likely to use face-to-face learning.
Are you saying that more people are completely withdrawing from the district instead of pursuing district-sponsored remote learning? Because that would be even more surprising to me.
anon says
No, I don’t think many are leaving the district altogether. I was just surprised that more in the high SES schools aren’t using the district’s virtual option. Then again, *I’m* not, because I have to work.
Mary Moo Cow says
I think a more telling metric is how many kids registered but then withdrew to homesschool or attend a private school. I’m seeing FB groups for homeschooling pods; our daycare is throwing together a private kindergarten; and at least one of my pre-K kid’s classmates was registered for K but is now attending private school. Based purely on this small sample, I’d guess more people are choosing homeschooling or private schooling.
Anon says
Some people where I live have pulled their kids to enroll them in a cyber charter, since they figure it’s better than whatever virtual education the school may come up with. I think there are so many unknowns though – maybe parents are out of work due to Covid and can now keep their kids home, or households with two working parents have no other good childcare option than school now that their kids aren’t in daycare anymore.
Anon for this says
This is a completely cynical take, but my sister taught for several years in a “poor” school (BTW, we didn’t exactly grow up in a luxurious area), and her clear opinion was that a lot of families in her former district wanted remote because they thought it would mean they would be able to get away with not really having to do anything, like they did in spring.
anon says
Well … some teachers here have alluded to that being the case as well. I also think it’s possible that some of the wealthier families are opting for homeschooling. Most of the private schools around here are affiliated with churches, so the people who would want that for their kids were already enrolled in those schools, if that makes sense.
Anonymous says
That’s more than cynical, it is classist and racist.
Realist says
+1. Many low wage workers work very hard and many also highly value education.
Anon for this says
Eh, she knows the school better than you or I do.
And no one mentioned race; what race do your stereotypes make you think this applies to?
Clementine says
FWIW, The environment where I’ve seen teachers struggling the most with distance learning is extremely poor, rural districts with limited/no internet capability. Even if they could get kids wifi hot spots, there’s no connectivity.
When she said this, I was assuming that she was talking about a poor, mostly white rural district (like the one a close family member of mine teaches in).
And… I didn’t see that there was a question regarding general work ethic in her response, but an observational communication from someone who teaches in a community where Education is not a universally agreed on item of importance.
(Also – and my stats are rusty on this – immigrant families are more likely to have higher rates of education for children and I think we can all point to a lot of examples in our own lives.)
anon says
I’d guess that the wealthy areas have a lot more people “homeschooling” (aka hiring private tutors) or moving to private schools. Any idea how the actual numbers compare to enrollments last year?
Clementine says
In my area, wealthier districts/schools have higher proportions of parents who 1) Both work, 2) aren’t laid off and thus are still working, and 3) Are higher educated and thus prioritize education (note: say what you will, there is a much lower emphasis on education in environments where ‘normal’ is ‘nobody graduated high school’. Yes, we need to do better.).
It’s kind of like the after school program. The schools in the higher income areas have massive waitlists while there is little participation in the lower income areas – largely because there is always a parent/aunt/grandparent who lives in the household who is available for childcare.
Anon. says
This was my question – are lower SES families more likely to have multigenerational living arrangements resulting in daytime childcare and/or more concern about exposure of elderly family members?
Anonymous says
Wow, that is very different than my district. In my district the higher SES schools had a higher rate of remote learning, and 50% of the district chose the remote option. It is a wealthy suburban district in Texas.
SC says
There were similar results in my area. I think part of it is that lower income families have been hit hardest by Covid already. Also, lower income families are more likely to multiple generations living together or to at least be caring for older family members frequently/daily.
Anonforthis says
This is what I understand is going on in my area as well. Lower-income households are more likely to have older or high-risk family members, and the parents don’t want the family member to be exposed, particularly when they’ve seen the virus have a devastating impact on their community already.
Anonymous says
I’m embarrassed to say this, but in my high SES area, the reason is because we have a high number of Trump fans and virus naysayers.
Anon for this says
My husband has to travel next week for work. There is no option (believe me, I’ve pushed back and so has he, but he does work in an essential service). He’s driving, not flying, and being tested before and after so honestly the exposure part is not super concerning to me at this point.
However, I’m almost 9 months pregnant and have a toddler. I do have a babysitter but no family close by (both sets of grands are 2 hours away). I have hired a doula, so in the absolute worst case scenario that I need to go to L&D for either monitoring or the real deal my doula would come with me and babysitter would stay w/ kiddo until whichever set of grands can get here fastest gets here.
But my biggest worry is that today I woke up with just absolute crushing fatigue. Like I’m not sure how I’m going to work today, I may just have to sleep. How am I going to do a week solo? I have the babysitter but short of asking her to move in with me I am not sure how I’m going to do this. It’s kind of just hitting me that I’m ginormous and exhausted. Thoughts and prayers?
anon says
I’m so sorry. I can only imagine how tired you are! Can you call in a set of grands for the 2nd part of the week? Take a personal day to sleep while babysitter entertains kiddo? Ask a friend to come over in the evening to help? I’d bring you dinner if I could. Order takeout all week and play some of those ‘tired parent’ games this group came up with a few weeks ago. If asking for help is an option, now would be a good time to do so. good luck!!
Anonymous says
Call you mom and tell her you need her to come move in today.
EB0220 says
This is what I would do too if your parents (or in-laws) are up for it. My mom moved in with us a few weeks before I had #2 and it was really helpful.
NYCer says
+1. Assuming you have a good relationship with your mom, this is absolutely what I would do in your situation. Otherwise, I would seriously consider asking the babysitter to stay with you for the week.
OP says
Yeah, I think this may be what I need to do. I was being really proud like, I can handle it! And now I’m like… I cannot handle it.
I am taking the Friday off to rest while he’s with the babysitter, so I do only need to make it four workdays.
Anonymous says
Call her right now
No Face says
Call ASAP. Solo parenting and working full time while this pregnant is not something you should be trying. I am a “power through” type person but do not white knuckle this!
Anonymous says
You can handle it! But you shouldn’t need to. This is why we have families and communities to help. My mom moved in 2 weeks before my second was born and it wasn’t during Covid. You are killing it right now!
IHeartBacon says
Yes, you can handle it! It’s just that sometimes “handling it” means knowing when to bring in back up. Even professional athletes have pinch hitters!
Anon says
I’m sorry. This sucks. Could your husband request FMLA instead if you are due soon? That would have him losing some time after the baby is born but it would get him protected leave out of this trip if his employer is large enough. I’m guessing your doctor would provide a note that he needs the leave to care for you.
How far away are the Grands? Does your husbands trip have him traveling that way? Could he detour to drop your toddler off with the grands on the outbound and pick them back up on the inbound?
Anon says
Speaking of teeth… I have a one year old and it’s nearly impossible to brush his teeth. I can get a few brushes in during the morning but I wouldn’t say I’m doing a good job. I can’t get him to sit still or open his mouth so that I can see what I’m doing. Any tips?
I switched to a regular toddler toothbrush which seems to work better than the other baby brushes I had. I had the Smile Frida brush that goes on your finger but I couldn’t get it aligned properly to get his top and bottom teeth most of the time and even then it was touch and go as to wether or not I’d lose a finger. :)
Anon says
Might be a smidge too young for this but could you use the Disney Magic Timer app to hold his attention for two minutes, and combine it with you brushing with the toddler toothbrush?
Quail says
Two toothbrushes – one for her (10 months and 7 teeth), one for me. While she’s chewing on or inspecting her toothbrush, I can sneak mine in. It’s working for now, and I still have all my fingers :)
Anon says
At that age I would brush upside down (or, TBH, while wrestling her to the floor and crying leads to an open mouth). With my older toddler (around 15-18 months) I was able to hunt for dinosaurs and talk about all the dinosaurs I found in there (she went through a dino phase) in order to get an open mouth and cooperation. Now at 3 we take turns – she gets to brush, then I brush, then she finishes.
Anonymous says
We’ve done two toothbrushes with turns, and it works well. Kiddo gets the first turn, and then it is parent’s turn.
CCLA says
Check out the baby buddy toothbrush. It has 360 deg bristles so when they inevitably close their mouth, as long as you can get some movement, you can just move the brush back and forth and it gets both top and bottom.
TheElms says
I use this for 14 month old and really like it.
Anonymous says
Why have I never heard of this before? Ordering right now.
Redux says
We’ve had our first run of the mill cold, kids had low fevers and stuffy noses for a day, next day was runny noses and coughing. We kept them home from daycare. But the screening questions to return ask if you’ve had any of those symptoms in the last 14 days. Does this mean that even though it was just a run of the mill cold, and they are mostly better, they have to be out of daycare for 14 days from the date of their last symptom? That could be 3 more weeks the way coughs linger…
In NY, fwiw. Realizing we are going to have no school/daycare come fall if this is the way this works…
Anonanonanon says
This is my concern, as well, because I don’t know which answer I prefer. My kids are the type that get colds that linger, so will they be out for 3 weeks every time they have one? But, also, I want a daycare that is diligent about stopping COVID… so I’m not sure how they’re supposed to magically know who does and does not have COVID while letting people with symptoms return. Not being snarky, I just genuinely don’t know the answer because, like so many things right now, all options stink.
Anon says
My understanding is that Covid is most contagious before symptoms start and in the first few days after symptoms start, so letting kids return after being fever free for 48-72 hours is probably fine even if it is Covid.
Anon says
What’s their policy? We have a symptom screening form that asks about the last 14 days, but kids only have to stay out for 48 hours for fever. I answer honesty on the screening form, but teachers don’t expect kids to stay home for 14 days after any cold/fever. I think the screening is just to keep good records/for liability reasons.
AwayEmily says
Same for ours, except it’s 72 hours for fever.
Redux says
You hit on another anxiety of mine– people having an incentive to be dishonest on the form. This only works if everyone is honest, and people will only be honest if their alternatives are reasonable (e.g., reasonable timeframes to return, giving parents sick leave, etc.).
Anon says
I’m not really understanding why there would be an incentive to lie on the form unless children are excluded for a full 14 days for any cold/allergy symptoms, which I think would be a pretty unusual policy. The reality is that people with covid are most contagious before and immediately after displaying symptoms, so I don’t know that the number of days children must be fever-free before returning to school matters very much. What you really want in a perfect world is teachers and children staying home whenever they’ve had contact with a suspected covid case, because that’s the time period during which they’re most likely to be contagious and not yet know it. Our daycare does require teachers and students to quarantine for 14 days if they’ve had contact with a known or suspected covid case, which I think is a much better policy (both safer and more practical) than excluding kids for 14 days every time they have a runny nose or cough.
Redux says
Yes, that’s exactly it– there is a (negative) incentive to lie if telling the truth results in something unsustainable. I.e., a long quarantine from daycare school or having to call in sick/ risk losing your job to stay home watching your kids.
Anonymous says
Ours is also 72 hours after a fever ends. We also checked with our doctor regarding the illness (said it was a cold) and my community has free, public COVID testing, so I went and got tested to be more confident that none of us had it. The test results took 3 days (negative!), so we were out of child care a total of 6 days (4 work days and a weekend), but felt confident sending him back.
Boston Legal Eagle says
Ours has a policy of needing to be fever-free for 72 hours. So when our younger one got a mild fever a few weeks ago, we had to keep both home for the rest of the week. Prior to the fever, I answered “yes” to the runny nose question, and daycare said a runny nose by itself is not enough to keep them out, it’s more the fever. Coughs I’m less sure of – maybe depends on how severe the cough sounds?
Ideally, you’re in a place to get a Covid test and results the same day, that would probably be the best for daycare. I thought we were, but apparently it takes up to a week here… I don’t know how we’re ever going to fight this virus with these delays.
Leatty says
Ask your school/daycare if your child can return with a negative COVID test. The rapid tests aren’t quite as accurate as the ones that take longer, but perhaps a negative rapid test would allow your children to return to school.
Anon says
Isn’t the test pretty traumatic? I wouldn’t put my kid through that unless it was required to return or her doctor was recommending it.
Anonymous says
My 4 year old had the test and it was not at all traumatic. The hardest part was that it was after bedtime, and with his fever he kept falling asleep in my arms. Not a rapid test, though, the rapid testing centers here don’t test children. It took 8 days to get results.
FWIW I wanted a test with only a fever and no other symptoms, so we could know. He did end up getting a rash which was probably a viral rash associated with a fever. I would have gotten the test with a fever and cough.
The sheet we got from the doctor said to quarantine until 72 hours with no fever, no or greatly reduced symptoms, and 10 days from the onset of symptoms.
layered bob says
My four year old just had a covid test and it was totally fine, but our pediatrician sent us to a testing site that was using the type of test (I think there are different ones) that takes a swab from medium-deep in each nostril, rather than the type that goes very deep into one nostril.
However we were supposed to get results within 48 hours and did not actually get results for TEN DAYS. At least it was negative.
FVNC says
This just happened to us. The test was not traumatic, and daycare’s policy is that a kid can return after 24 hrs fever-free with a negative covid test. But yes, without a covid test, there’s no way to return to daycare or school without the long quarantine period.
Midwest Anon says
Our daycare is making children with runny noses stay home until they see a doctor or wait a number of days. Children can return to daycare with a negative COVID test.
Realist says
Covid presents differently in different people, and the run of the mill symptoms can align with it. The easy solution would be a quick result test so that you don’t have to wait the 14 day quarantine period, but that may not be an option in your area. This is one reason we are doing remote learning. My child has allergy symptoms throughout most of fall/winter that are on the Covid list. We can’t possibly comply with any reasonable sick policy while Covid is going on. And I don’t want my child in any facility that doesn’t enforce a reasonable sick policy. So here we are in this neverending nightmare with no good solutions.
Anon says
You’re conflating two very different things. The incubation period is 14 days (although the mean incubation time is 5 days). That means if you’re exposed to the virus it can take 14 days for symptoms to appear. You are not contagious for 14 days after symptoms appear. It is in no way shape or form “unreasonable” to let children return to school less than 14 days after running a fever.
Anonymous says
Some people are not contagious for 14 days after symptoms appear, but you cannot say that about everyone. I most likely had Covid in early April but was unable to get tested. I had a fever for 3-4 days, and my cough hung on for a total of 5ish weeks. It didn’t start improving for at least 3 weeks until after symptoms appeared. The Covid clinic I “went” (remotely) to (very well respected, part of a large univeristy medical school) said that was typical of the cases they’d seen. To be considered recovered and non-contagious (at that time anyway), you had to be fever free for 72 hours AND your other symptoms have improved even if not completely gone away. I didn’t meet those criteria for at least 3 weeks, which is well over 14 days.
FWIW, our school district is requiring folks to be at least 10 days from onset of symptoms to return to classes unless you have a negative test.
Anon says
You can absolutely be symptomatic and not contagious. It’s very common with the flu for a cough to linger for a week or two but you aren’t contagious after the first few days. It’s well known that in many people Covid symptoms last for weeks or months, but there’s zero evidence anyone is contagious for longer than a few days to a week. Some countries (including the UK, I think) have official medical guidance that you’re no longer contagious 7 days after symptoms first appear regardless of how crummy you may still feel.
Realist says
Based on CDC Guidelines it is common for policies to require 10-14 days quarantine after symptoms. But, like everything else from this national clusterf***, it is choose your own adventure. So each daycare might have their own guidelines. And we still don’t know as much as we need to for good quarantine lengths. Other countries have found live virus shedding in patients more than 14 days after initial symptom onset.
CDC: https://www.cdc.gov/coronavirus/2019-ncov/hcp/duration-isolation.html
Anon says
It’s a numbers game. If you have a confirmed Covid case, it makes more sense to quarantine for a long time even if most people are not contagious after 7 days. But when you just have a runny nose, there’s only a very small chance you have Covid, and there’s a very small chance that even if you do have Covid you would infect someone more than 3 days after your symptoms stop. Multiplying those odds gets you a much lower number, so the risk looks very different than it does in a know Covid case. Plus there’s the fact that the person likely already exposed everyone while pre-symptomatic. No symptom-based quarantine is going to catch every case because of asymptomatic and pre-symptomatic spread, and it’s not unreasonable to put precautions in place based on what happens in 95% of cases.
Looking good/feeling good at home? says
After 6+ months of almost chronic pain and two surgeries, I’m finally feeling a little bit better health wise. I have basically been wearing men’s pajamas for the better part of a year as a result of covid and my health issues. I’m coming out of it now and want to look just a little bit nice while also feeling comfortable working from home with a toddler. What are you ladies doing to feel like/look like yourselves during all of this? Nice sweats? Small jewelry? I put on some small studs and under-eye concealer today and I’m really happy about it.
avocado says
At first I tried wearing athleisure, but it made me feel resentful that I was working and not curled up in my armchair with a book. A few weeks into the pandemic I settled on a WFH uniform of a t-shirt, a drapey cardigan like the Athleta Pranayama, and comfortable jeans (spring) or linen shorts (summer). I put on my earrings, wedding ring, and watch as another signal to myself that it’s work time. Most days I put on eyeliner, mascara, and tinted lip balm so I don’t look like a corpse in the mirror. For video recordings and important videoconferences I put on full makeup, but not a lot of eyeshadow because it tends to look garish on camera. Avoiding foundation most of the time has done wonders for my skin.
Recently I’ve ended up spending most mornings in sweaty workout/dog-walking clothes and showering at lunch. I do not recommend this approach.
Anon says
I picked up some cotton-linen joggers in bright colors that I think are cute and comfy and have pockets (my mother, sister and aunt informed me they were not flattering and I should not wear them out of the house but c’est la vie) and usually pair those with a tucked in modal tee. I like them because they hit at my natural waist and sort of blouse over my (3-year)PP belly/c-section dunlop (so many body changes in this season of life that I have just not made peace with yet). I alternate that with two t-shirt maxi dresses that I also would never wear out of the house but are super comfortable. For “fancy” days I wear a boxy tee with a maxi skirt.
For me – I shower every morning. My wedding ring never comes off, but I do put my diamond studs in every day. I only put makeup on if I have a planned video call – anyone who gets me with short notice video gets me as I am.
anon says
I do my hair and makeup every day. The amount of makeup depends on how many meetings I have, but it is hard for me to feel like I’m in work mode if I’m not somewhat put together. Undone hair + no makeup = weekend relaxation time.
No Face says
Congrats of getting through your health issues!
My outfits are either t-shirt dresses, or leggings and a loose top. I get dressed every morning before I start working. My hair is neat. I do very simple makeup (eyebrows + eyeliner + foundation). The foundation I’m using is a liquid foundation I bought in an emergency when I was on a business trip. It doesn’t match well enough to wear it outside, but I smear it on my face like lotion when I WFH. Better than throwing it away.
Anonymous says
Mascara is my savior these days. Looks good on Zoom and over a mask.
IHeartBacon says
I’m happy to hear you are doing well health-wise!
I shower every morning.
Hair: apply hair product, let air dry
Makeup: mascara, brow filler, tinted lip balm
Jewelry: wedding ring, watch, small studs
Clothing: my casual Friday work clothes (i.e., jeans, casual buttoned shirt, ballet flats or slip on shoes)
Wearing real shoes seems to be the secret for me to deal with working from home with a toddler. I also get my toddler dressed every day instead of letting him sit around all day in his pajamas. I don’t know why, but these two things make or break my day.
Anon for this says
Ugh after a summer of antisocial ness, we are supposed to see friends (and their kids) this weekend. Then another friend wanted to drop off a present for DS yesterday and I suggested a socially distant hike. Kids mostly kept distance but all are under 8 so it wasn’t perfect. Now other friends making me feel bad.
And I think I did the wrong thing! I DO feel bad! I’m pretty sure we didn’t get Covid! But we shouldn’t have done it! Yet my kids were so happy to play with other kids and honestly I’m exhausted by making all of these grey area type decisions! And when school starts back (for us planned virtual then in person after Labor Day) it’s just going to get worse! The emotional labor here is real.
Oh I should have added, Friends don’t trust friends we went on hike with. I started crying this morning. I honestly didn’t put that much thought into it and should have.
Anon says
It’s so hard. I’ve accepted that our social circle for the next year+ will be limited to daycare families because the kids already have exposure to each other through school. My closest friends and their families live far away so it’s not an issue, but I’m pretty sure they’d refuse to see me because they’re being even more cautious than I am (even though I feel like I’m being more cautious than 95% of people).
Anokha says
I’m so sorry. We are also limiting our social circle to my daughter’s preschool friends, under the theory that they’ve already been exposed. But this is all so exhausting and all I want to do is put down my head and cry. (FWIW, I think that an outdoor hike with mostly social distancing is totally fine.)
Anonymous says
Your friends are horrible and your hike was fine. Stop sharing your life with people like this!
Anon says
No. We shouldn’t be calling people names and passing judgment on those who are more risk averse than we are. Honestly, if I’d made plans with a friend under the assumption that they would be keeping isolated this week I’d be annoyed too, and it’s totally understandable if they want to cancel.
Similarly, OP took a risk that she was okay with and we shouldn’t make her feel bad, either. We need to give each other a lot of grace to be able to say “no” and change our minds when it comes to our level of comfort and safety right now.
Anon says
+1. Having a different level of risk tolerance does not make someone a horrible friend. OP didn’t do anything wrong, but her friend’s reaction is also valid.
AIMS says
I don’t recommend this. If you are seeing these friends they have the right to know that you’ve been seeing other people and if they don’t feel comfortable with that, they should have the option to not see you. BUT – there is no reason to feel bad about it. We are all navigating this as best as we can in the ways that work for us. It is what it is. No reason to feel bad.
anon says
The gray area decisions are almost harder than the big ones! I also don’t think you did anything wrong — a socially distanced hike is well within the range of acceptable, IMO. Without knowing the dynamics, it’s hard to know whether your other friend is correct to mistrust the first friend. But I do think she’s overreacting a bit. It’s not like you went to an indoor trampoline park together or something.
We have tightened our social circles during all this, which is really hard. I miss some of our friends dearly, but we’re trying to stay with other families who are exposed in roughly the same way we are (same daycare, same school, same street). Some of our best friends live in another school district and they are socially distancing with their neighbors, so we’re not seeing each other during this time. It stinks, but we all get it. We’re all trying to reduce our risk.
Spirograph says
I’m sorry your friend made you feel this way. FWIW, majority socially distant hikes with another family are 100% in my comfort zone, irrespective of whether I think the other family has been social distancing as well as I have. Open air, small group, breathing away from each other… this totally meets my definition of a minimal risk activity.
These decisions are hard, and very individual. It’s fine if someone isn’t comfortable spending time with me because of my potential covid exposure (my husband is working in an office again, I get it!), but there’s a way to do it without being a jerk, and it sounds like your one friend missed the mark.
KW says
My mom is watching my 22 month old for the foreseeable future. Any recs for something he can nap on at her house? An air mattress? A portable/fold-up toddler bed? He’s not a fan of our pack ‘n play. Thanks.
LittleBigLaw says
I would just do a pallet on the floor at that age, maybe with a kindermat if it’s not carpeted.
AwayEmily says
Shrunks toddler bed. It’s inflatable and great for travel in general. My 4yo still happily sleeps on it when we travel.
Mary Moo Cow says
Both my kids slept on foldable futons (they look like the Nugget) at grandparents house and loooove them. I think they found them on A-Zon or Walmart.
AnothearAnon says
If she already has an air mattress that would work. Otherwise, my mom had success by making a “special” pallet on the floor for kiddo out of blankets and quilts she already had.
Anne says
Amazon has a lot of nap cots (like they’d have in daycare but fold up) that work surprisingly great for naps at that age.
not using usual name for this says
Fairfax just released sample schedules for elementary learning and… yikes. They are basically having kids sit in front of a computer for the length of an entire school day, four days a week. I thought it would be 3-4 hours a day!
Anonymous says
Our virtual elementary school is 6 hours a day alternating Zoom and offline work supervised by a parent, 5 days a week.
Anon says
i’m not saying that this sounds great, but i feel like schools are stuck between a rock and a hard place – they will either be told they are providing too little, too much, not enough live instruction, etc.
not using usual name for this says
Agree. I would never complain to them or leave a nasty comment on facebook, I’m just surprised they’re doing electives (art remotely? Music remotely? PE remotely), so much “classroom meeting time”, etc. I wish they would put the academics in the morning and have them be mandatory, and then the fluffier stuff in the afternoon as an option.
Anonymous says
They may not have an option on what they can have be optional based on your state’s requirements.
Anonymous says
Yeah, we had “optional” multi-grade enrichment classes in the afternoon in the spring and it was less than ideal. My middle elementary kid figured out that they were optional and wanted to opt out of participating. (Admittedly, this was as much an our family discipline issue as anything). But, it also made him really disconnected with the teachers and curriculum which made all the busywork assignments that much more frustrating to do. I think had he been in more targeted/formal classes, it would have gone better, especially since his core remote classes went much smoother.
Remote says
Same here in NY. I imagine it’s because they don’t have an exemption to waive state requirements even if it seems ridiculous to do remote PE rather than playing outside. I’m hoping that teachers will be flexible in assessing mastery of subjects rather than being all about facetime
anon says
I’ve said this before here, but I would honestly choose to home school before I “supervised” a young child (K-2) on Zoom all day. I am confident that with a provided home school curriculum, I could teach my 5 year old all the academics he needs in 2-3 hours a day. DH could teach math, and I could teach reading/writing. We’d fit those few hours in around work. The rest of the day, Kiddo could do art, play, and have educational screen time. Kids will be fine if they don’t get art, music, PE, etc by screen.
I also like the idea of having mandatory morning sessions with math and LA (with a break or two to move their bodies and have a snack), with the fluffier stuff as an option in the afternoons.
Anonymous says
I agree that for K-2, true homeschooling would be a lot less work than virtual school. My guess is that a lot of parents are putting up with virtual school instead of homeschooling because they hope that the kids will go back at least part time after the first month or two. I don’t think this is a very realistic hope, though.
Spirograph says
Absolutely. As much as I want to support public schools, they are not even an option we are considering this year. I have a K and 2nd grader, it will be much easier for me and less frustrating for my kids to home school than to follow whatever virtual learning schedule the public school comes up with.
Anon2 says
At most! Rule of thumb for K is 45 min, an hour MAX of formal instruction (plus reading books and the general informal education that comes from playing or cooking or doing whatever). I am seriously considering this for my K student once our school makes a final decision…6 hours of zoom is terrible for him AND me!
anon says
PG county (other side of DC) also released sample schedules for elem that are very similar, with synchronized learning occurring at regular intervals throughout the day.
anon says
I hope it’s not too late in the day to get responses, but here goes: Am I nuts to be thinking about going back to full time work during the upcoming school year, assuming we’ll be distance learning all year? I was a biglaw associate when I took a step back around 5 years ago to contract part time and have control over my hours and work flow while kids were young. It’s been great, but I always planned to ramp back up to full time once kids were in school. 2020 was going to be my year! Then….you know, covid. Online learning was not good this spring; I found it extremely difficult to get work done (even though in theory I am very well situated with my hours and flexibility); I often fantasized about hiding out in my home office all day (and in this fantasy, I guess my kids would be able to manage themselves). My work is steady and super low stress, but I am not feeling it anymore–and that was the case before the pandemic. I miss having coworkers and even working in an office; obviously that’s not do-able right now anyway, but again this has been brewing since pre-pandemic. I worry a lot about losing marketability. I also worry that there may be a big return to the workforce once things normalize, such that for me to have a better chance of getting hired (since I expect it’s going to be tougher with my ramp-down), maybe I should try to get in now. I’m far enough out from firm life that some of the time, I semi-convince myself that it would be manageable to juggle online school and full time work. But then I think, if I were still at a firm, I’d probably be so envious of my current situation. So, please, for those who are working busy firm hours with young elementary students at home — I’d love to hear your thoughts. Am I nuts for even considering this (assuming I’d be able to get hired if I tried)? Clearly some of you are managing to do this — how bad is it really?
Anon says
I’m a former Big Law associate and now have a 9-5 job (with flexibility about when and where I work) and the last five months have been h3ll while daycare was closed. I have a two year old and I recognize that elementary age kids are much more independent, but the younger elementary kids I know aren’t anywhere near independent enough to manage their own virtual schooling and give their parents an uninterrupted workday. I guess if you’re comfortable with the Covid risk you could bring in a nanny or two (based on the hours needed, you would probably need more than one person), but with school and many other avenues for socialization closed, a lot of kids are feeling anxious and needing time and physical closeness with their parents more than ever. It just doesn’t seem like the right time to me to jump into this kind of high-pressure career.
Anonymous says
It is awful. Where is the kids’ father in this? If he steps up and you add a sitter, it is doable. But I would insist on his agreement to scale down/back so you can move forward.
Anonymous says
Young elementary (k and 2 this past spring) has been a disaster. The K-er cannot stay on task, hates being taught by a parent, and cannot sit still. A work page that should take 10 minutes takes 2 hours. 2nd grader is a fantastic student, but still needs motivation and help to stay on task. Online tech stuff is not straightforward at all and is different for each grade (and even within grades, different by teacher!). Schedule changed multiple times and we’d miss the virtual class time by accident.
It was horrible and my kids learned something. A friend in another school had a similar grade kid and said her kid had 30 minutes of work papers and was done every day. Then what to do with them? Without full time help that can provide education assistance, no way would I plan to start working now. (And my friend whose nanny got COVID, well, no one can plan for that.)