Week in the Life of a Working Mom: In-House Counsel in Texas

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A woman waering a yellow sweater and two bracelets working at a wooden desk and typing on a laptop. The text overlay reads,

For this installment of our Week in the Life of a Working Mom series, we’re happy to introduce CorporetteMoms reader Siobhan, who lives in Dallas with her husband, four daughters, and dog, and works as a in-house counsel for a software development company.

Our usual caveat applies: Please remember that this is is a real person who has feelings and isn’t gaining anything from this, unlike your usual friendly (soul-deadened, thick-skinned, cold-hearted, money-grubbing) blogger — so please be kind with any comments. Thank you! — Kat

If you’d like to be featured (anonymously or otherwise), please fill out this form! You can see all posts in this series here.

First, Some Basics About This Working Mom…

Name: Siobhan
Location: Dallas, TX
Job: In-house counsel for a software development company (also my blog The Law Mother; @TheLawMother on social media)
Age: 47
Home Situation: I live in a 3,400-square-foot house with my husband (48-year-old Biglaw partner), our four daughters (17, 14, 12, and 8), and our golden retriever who considers herself the fifth daughter.
Childcare Situation: My 8-year-old and 12-year-old attend after-school care at their Catholic elementary school. My 17-year-old and 14-year-old attend a Catholic high school 30 minutes away, and ride the school bus to the elementary school. I pick up all four girls at 4:45 p.m. The high school buses kids to and from Catholic elementary schools all over town to make school drop-offs and pickups easier for families with multiple-age kids.

How much do you pay for childcare?
Four kids in private school plus an additional $300 a month for after-school care

We asked Siobhan about her decision to send her kids to private/religious school, and she shared this:

My husband and I are both products of Catholic schools, and credit Catholic education with our success. When it came time to choose schools for our children, the decision was easy.

Our girls attend a K–8 elementary/middle school and a 9–12 high school. Both schools have outstanding academics, supportive teachers and staff, the right balance between traditional learning and technology, and community.

Regarding academics in particular, our girls’ K–8 Catholic school prioritizes phonics-based reading instruction and cursive handwriting, like they’ve done for 60 years. Two of my daughters are severely dyslexic and benefited greatly from this kind of instruction (along with therapy from a certified academic therapist, also provided free of charge by their school).

While more much affordable than some of the other private schools in our area, Catholic school is still a sacrifice. Money we spend on tuition now means less money for the girls’ college and our retirement. But it the long run, we think it’s worth it.

We also asked Siobhan whether she gets a lot of comments as a mom of four girls (including annoying ones), and she had this to say:

All the time. Always starts with, “Four girls, your poor husband.” And it goes downhill from there. “Going to try for the boy?” “Do they all have the same dad?” “Start saving for all those weddings.” “I hope your dog’s a boy.” Occasionally, I’ll come across someone who tries to be clever by making a reference to famous sister quartets like the March sisters of Little Women or the Ingalls sisters of the Little House series.

I get it. People tend to say the first thing that pops into their heads, and four girls is unusual. Though, not that usual. Two of my good friends also have four daughters. I just wish the questions weren’t so gendered and negative, especially when my daughters are in earshot.

Answers for the record. My husband hit the jackpot with four daughters. I don’t discuss my sex life with random people in (fill in name of store). Yes, one man can produce that many girls. Forget weddings, we’re saving for college, med school, law school, etc. Dog is a girl (of course). Would you want to be compared to Amy March (or Mary Ingalls)? I didn’t think so.

How is the work-life balance in your industry in general? What are common ways of juggling responsibilities that you see your colleagues and coworkers doing?
As in-house counsel, I have a much better work-life balance than lawyers generally do. I’m expected to be responsive to calls and emails during normal working hours (9 to 5, Monday to Friday), but I can schedule calls and Zoom meetings around school drop-offs and pickups.

I rarely get calls after hours or on the weekends. My job is fully remote, and I work from home. My husband, on the other hand, is a Biglaw partner. He works long hours with some travel. He’s also the managing partner of his office, so he has administrative duties on top of his legal practice.

How do you handle household chores, such as laundry, grocery shopping, housecleaning, etc.? Who does what, and when — and how often?
I have a housekeeper who comes twice a week to clean and do laundry. My husband does the grocery shopping on the weekend, and we divide cooking duties (he’s a better cook than me). I do the morning chores (make beds, load/unload the dishwasher), and my husband does the evening chores (load/unload the dishwasher, take out trash). I also do laundry throughout the week and handle all of the “kid management” tasks (e.g., clothes shopping, school paperwork, homework, etc.).

Siobhan added, “I returned to work full time this year after seven years of being a stay-at-home mom with a very small private practice. I started out my career in Biglaw (M & A and Securities, 80-hour weeks), transitioned to a small firm after I had my first daughter, and then stayed home after I had my fourth daughter.

“I was nervous jumping starting my career after a seven-year break, but it has gone really well. I work for a great company and genuinely like my coworkers, though I have yet to meet any of them in person as we are all working remotely. I also enjoy being in-house as opposed to a law firm. Things I did right while ‘leaning out’ from my career? I kept my license active, did the odd project here and there, and kept up with my professional contacts (or at least the ones I was friends with). It kept me in the lawyer mindset.”

A Week in My Life

Sunday

8:00 a.m.–12:00 p.m. Sunday morning chores (laundry, get the girls’ uniforms ready for the week, make my weekly schedule). Make breakfast for the girls. Read the Sunday morning paper.
12:00–12:30 p.m. Live Peloton run with my favorite instructor.
12:30–2:30 p.m. Brunch with the girls.
2:30–6:30 p.m. Husband works with our oldest girl on her college applications. I do the grocery shopping, take the other girls to a birthday party, and write a blog post.
6:30–7:30 p.m. Cook and eat dinner with the girls.
7:30–8:30 p.m. Watch TV with the girls and help them get ready for the week (discuss schedules, upcoming homework deadlines).
8:30–9:30 p.m. Oversee girls’ evening routine.
In bed around 10:00 p.m. and read for 30 minutes.

Monday

6:30–8:15 a.m. I get the girls up and ready for school. My husband leaves with the two older girls at 7:00 a.m. to drop them off at the high school bus stop. It’s 10 minutes from our house, and then a 25-minute bus ride to school. I leave at 7:30 a.m. to drop the two younger girls at school 20 minutes away.
8:15–8:30 a.m. Arrive home and check work email. I work 100% remotely.
8:30–9:00 a.m. 30-minute run on my Peloton Tread.
9:00–9:30 a.m. Shower and get dressed for the day.
9:30–10:00 a.m. Review and respond to work emails and make my to-do list for the day.
10:00 a.m.–12:00 p.m. Work.
12:00–12:30 p.m. Lunch and walk the dog.
12:30–4:00 p.m. Work, including a couple of Zoom meetings.
4:00–5:00 p.m. Pick up all four girls at the younger two girls’ elementary school. The older two girls’ high school buses them to the elementary school.
5:00–7:00 p.m. Finish up work tasks for the day, including updating to-do list and recording my time. I also oversee homework and spend time with the girls.
7:00–8:30 p.m. Husband arrives home and we cook and eat dinner and hang out with the girls.
8:30–10:00 p.m. Oversee the girls’ evening routine. Help with homework, chat with the teenagers, showers, and bedtime. Husband does the dinner dishes and a 30-minute Peloton Ride.
In bed around 10:00 p.m. and read for 30 minutes.

We asked Siobhan how she got into a daily reading habit — and whether she had some books to recommend!

For as long as I can remember, I’ve always carried a book with me wherever I go. As I kid, I would check out library books 10 at a time and cram them into my school backpack. As a shy, introverted kid, books gave me an escape. Whenever I needed a few minutes by myself to recharge, I’d pull out a book. Trust me, no one ever bothers a kid reading a book.

As an adult, I always carry my Kindle e-reader with me in my purse. No matter how busy you are, there are always going to be spare minutes when you can squeeze reading in. A wait for a doctor appointment that ends up being extra long. Carpool line at school. Kid’s sports practice running late. I’m a heavy user of the Libby app, which allows you to download e-books onto your Kindle.

As for book recommendations, I’ve read the Outlander books more times than I care to admit. My youngest daughter’s name is Claire, for my fellow Outlander fans. I’m also big into books about living a more productive and creative life. Two of my favorites are Cal Newport’s Deep Work, and Elizabeth Gilbert’s Big Magic: Creative Living Beyond Fear.

Tuesday 

6:30–8:15 a.m. Same as Monday morning schedule, except my husband has an early morning flight (down-and-back day trip to Houston) so I have to do both morning drop-offs.
8:15–11:00 a.m. Arrive home and begin work. Zoom meeting at 10:00 a.m.
11:00–11:20 a.m. Squeeze in a quick 20-minute run on the Peloton Tread.
11:30–12:30 p.m. Work.
12:30–1:30 p.m. Lunch, walk dog, and shower/get dressed for the day.
1:30–4:00 p.m. Work.
4:00–5:00 p.m. School pickup.
5:00–6:30 p.m. Eat dinner with the girls, finish up work tasks, and help with homework.
6:30–9:00 p.m. Advisory Board meeting at the younger two girls’ elementary school. I’m on the board. It’s the Catholic parochial school equivalent of a school board.
9:00–10:00 p.m. Oversee girls’ evening routine. Husband has arrives home and works out.
In bed around 11:00 p.m. and read for 30 minutes.

Wednesday 

6:30 a.m.–12:00 p.m. Repeat of Monday morning schedule.
12:00–1:00 p.m. Attend Virtual CLE while eating lunch.
1:00–4:00 PM Work, including Zoom meetings.
4:00–5:00 p.m. School pickup.
5:30–7:00 p.m. Dance class for youngest girl. I bring my laptop and work.
7:30–10:00 p.m. Husband home. Dinner. Oversee girls’ evening routine, including making sure homework was done. Online shopping with the two oldest girls for Homecoming dresses.
In bed around 10:30 p.m. and read for 30 minutes.

Thursday

6:30–8:15 a.m. Same as Monday schedule.
8:15 a.m.–12:00 p.m. Arrive home and begin work. Zoom meeting at 11:00 a.m.
12:00–1:00 p.m. Squeeze in a 20-minute run on the Peloton Tread, lunch, and shower/get dressed for the day.
1:00–4:00 p.m. Work, including two Zoom meetings.
4:00–5:00 p.m. School pickup. Oldest daughter stayed after school for an activity, so husband will pick her up from high school on his way home.
5:00–6:30 p.m. Finish up work tasks while oversee homework. Husband arrives home with oldest daughter and takeout.
6:30–7:00 p.m. Dinner.
7:00–8:30 p.m. Help with homework, watch TV with the girls, relax.
8:30–10:00 p.m. Oversee girls’ evening routine and get ready for the morning.
In bed around 10:30 p.m. and read for 30 minutes.

Friday

6:30 a.m.–5:00 p.m. Same as Monday schedule.
5:00–6:30 p.m. Finish up work tasks for the week (including time entries) and make Monday to-do list.
6:30–9:00 p.m. Cook dinner, dinner, movie night with the girls.
9:00–10:00 p.m. Oversee the girls’ evening routine while husband cleans the kitchen and works out.
In bed around 11:00 p.m. and read for 30 minutes.

Saturday

8:00 a.m.–11:00 a.m. Morning at home hanging out with the girls. Do my long weekend run (60 minutes) on the Peloton Tread.
12:00–6:00 p.m. Whirlwind of driving four kids to different activities.
6:00–7:00 p.m. Dinner.
7:00–10:00 p.m. Husband drives oldest daughter to friend’s house; spend time with other other girls.
10:00–10:30 p.m. Oversee girls’ evening routine.
11:00 p.m. Husband leaves to pick up oldest daughter from friend’s house.
In bed around midnight and read for 30 minutes.

Thanks so much to Siobhan for sharing a bit of her life as a working mom! Readers, what’s your biggest takeaway from her week of work as an in-house counsel as well as her general work/life balance?

Stock photo via Stencil.

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Nice to see these back!

I’m glad to see these back too! Thanks for sharing! This looks like a good balance, and I admire your nighttime reading routine. I keep trying, but instead slipping into TV watching most nights. Anwayssss….My kids are 3 and 5, so I’m wondering how much of this has shifted as the kids have gotten older. Like dinner – it is hard for us to eat much later than 6, even with snacks. It’d be nice to have that get a little more flexible. And do you and your husband get time together without kids much, and how do you make that fit in with the older kids/later bedtimes? Now, most of our time to talk as a couple is after kid bedtime, so just curious. And how much homework do your kids have, and do they usually resist doing it? Thanks again.

Wow! I love that you took seven years to be at home. It gives me hope that if I want/need to be with my kids full time, I can go back later on. Could you expand on how you decided to return to working outside of the home? What was the thought process? Thanks!

You are a rockstar (but I knew that) Love the peek at your routine….I could definitely use some more self discipline when it comes to daily routines 😵‍💫

4 kids in catholic school, but you don’t go to Mass? I’m not catholic, is that typical/allowed? Our catholic schools seem “very catholic” with field trips to the march for life in DC, etc, so I hadn’t thought about them for purely academic reasons.

So glad to see this series back! I just had a second baby so read your routine with my future in mind. Hats off to you for your break and return into law! Could you expand on how you developed your fitness routine? It’s great that you seem to build it in to your life seamlessly.