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My jewelry collection needs a little color, and there’s a lot to choose from with this necklace from Kendra Scott.
The stone comes in 23 (!) colors, so you’ll definitely be able to find your favorite. The adjustable length necklace (15″ to 17″) makes it perfect for layering with another delicate chain or wearing alone. It also works with almost any neckline.
This versatile necklace is perfect for work, weekends, and everywhere in between.
The Elisa Gold Pendant Necklace is $50 to $60 depending on the stone.
Sales of note for 4.18.24
(See all of the latest workwear sales at Corporette!)
- Ann Taylor – 50% off full-price dresses, jackets & shoes; $30 off pants & skirts; extra 50% off sale styles
- Banana Republic Factory – Up to 50% off everything; extra 20% off purchase
- Eloquii – 50% off select styles; 60% off swim; up to 40% off everything else
- J.Crew – Mid-Season Sale: Extra 60% off sale styles; up to 50% off spring-to-summer styles
- Lands’ End – 30% off full-price styles
- Loft – Spring Mid-Season Sale: Up to 50% off 100s of styles
- Nordstrom: Free 2-day shipping for a limited time (eligible items)
- Talbots – Spring Sale: 40% off + extra 15% off all markdowns; 30% off new T by Talbots
- Zappos – 29,000+ women’s sale items! (check out these reader-favorite workwear brands on sale, and some of our favorite kids’ shoe brands on sale)
Kid/Family Sales
- Carter’s – Up to 70% off baby items; 50% off toddler & kid deals & 40% off everything else
- Hanna Andersson – Up to 50% off spring faves; 25% off new arrivals; up to 30% off spring
- J.Crew Crewcuts – Up to 60% off sale styles; up to 50% off kids’ spring-to-summer styles
- Old Navy – 30% off your purchase; up to 75% off clearance
- Target – Car Seat Trade-In Event (ends 4/27); BOGO 25% off select skincare products; up to 40% off indoor furniture; up to 20% off laptops & printers
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And — here are some of our latest threadjacks of interest – working mom questions asked by the commenters!
- If you’re a working parent of an infant with low sleep needs, how do you function at work when you’re in the throes of baby’s sleep regression?
- Should I cut my childcare down to 12 hours a month if I work from home?
- Will my baby have speech delays if we raise her bilingual?
- Has anyone given birth in a teaching hospital?
- My child eats everything, and my friends’ kids do not – how should I handle? In general, what is the best way to handle when your child has some skill/ability and your friend’s child doesn’t have that skill/ability?
- ADHD moms, give me your tips to help with things like behavior in the classroom, attention to detail, etc?
- I think I suffer from mom rage…
- My husband and kids are gone this weekend – how should I enjoy my free time?
- I’m struggling to be compassionate with a SAHM friend who complains she doesn’t have enough hours of childcare.
- If you exclusively formula fed, what tips do you have for in the hospital and coming home?
- Could I take my 4-yo and 8-yo on a 7-8 day trip to Paris, Lyon, and Madrid?
Witch is it? says
The other day, I got so frustrated with my two year old getting out of his bed over and aber again at nap time, I said: „Go to sleep or the witch will come.“ (We talked about witches in connection with Halloween) and… he went straight to bed, put his head down and fell asleep.
Yesterday, same story. He doesn’t seem upset or anything about it. Am I traumatizing him with this?
Anon says
No.
Anonanonanon says
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
Sorry. I loved this. It’s probably fine. I don’t see how it’s any worse than Santa is watching and won’t bring you toys…
No Face says
I’m too busy chuckling to develop a strong opinion.
ElisaR says
haha i kind of love this.
Anon says
that sounds like how one of my college friends told me that growing up her mother told her that bubble baths make you very sick….and she didn’t realize that wasn’t true until she was in high school
Anonymous says
There is a myth(?) running around that bubble baths give you UTIs.
Anon says
It’s a known irritant, but whether or not it causes actual infections is questionable. Pediatricians did and maybe still do advise avoiding them though. Her mom probably was basing that on real medical advice she received from a pediatrician.
Anonymous says
Yeah, when I was a kid in the 70s/early 80s my mother was convinced that Mr Bubble led to Problems.
Anon says
My mom always told me bubble baths will give you a UTI and it’s not made up. The American Academy of Family Physicians says bubble baths can cause UTIs: https://www.aafp.org/afp/2004/0101/p155.html.
I doubt it’s really an issue unless you have a child who is already predisposed to UTIs though. I never was but I admit bubble baths still gross me out in my late 30s, probably because of what my mom told me. Hot tubs too.
More Sleep Would Be Nice says
I’m queen of this. I oscillate between multiple things (lizards, racoons, ghosts, alligators), whatever my older son hasn’t figured out he can use a light saber against.
Anon says
You’re using an ancient parenting technique! Telling our kids stories to help them learn how to behave is what almost all cultures around the world have done.
I support so fully.
Cb says
I really need to up my jewelry game. I have arthritis in my hands and find clasps a bear, so need something long enough to pull over my head. I should just go to Anthropologie and buy 2 or 3, right?
Anonymous says
Jumping off this, what is the work/business casual jewelry style these days? Is it still super delicate gold chains?
Anonanonanon says
It seems to have gone more towards 90s trends, so the more along the lines of a solid herringbone gold chain, at least in my observations.
ElisaR says
yeah…. also i hate that look but it is coming back
Anonymous says
I just can’t figure out what is in style for workwear in general these days. I am WFH and all of my meetings are either on Zoom or in person in my not-so-fashionable SEUS city, where people seem to be wearing their prepandemic clothes. I used to get all of my work style ideas from business travel, which hasn’t happened since March 2020 and is not likely to resume any time soon.
Anonanonanon says
Honestly, for professions that dress in business attire, I don’t think it has changed much since the pandemic! The only slight change is I think slim ankle pants that were sort of on their way out have been replaced with longer straight-leg pants with heels or loafers. The more fitted blazers were trending toward more menswear-inspired cuts it seemed. But, I don’t think anyone is going to turn up their nose at what we were wearing in early 2020 quite yet.
anne-on says
This – the younger/trendier people in my office are wearing a lot of straight leg pants with loafers/oxfords. In fact there are a lot of oxfords with dresses too. I’m sticking with my sheath dresses and blouses with ankle pants and flats/loafers because I don’t really want to buy new clothes (I had JUST bought 3 new dresses and 2 blazers before the pandemic) and my industry is very formal to begin with so there isn’t a ton of large scale changes.
I think as long as you’re not still doing the brightly colored pencil skirts with statement bubble necklaces a la 2010 you’re probably fine!
ElisaR says
and double breasted blazers seem very “in” which i guess kinda harks back to the 80s looks….
TheElms says
Following with interest. Some new earrings / necklaces / shoes would make me feel less frumpy. Sort of related to this, I have no idea how to dress myself for work now. My office was business casual leaning business formal, and now that we are back it is currently casual leaning business casual (but with business formal for court/ client meetings) through the end of 2021. Then who knows. Add to that a combination of being pregnant, then immediately post partum before the pandemic, then pandemic, now pregnant again; so I haven’t worn regular clothes since around September 2018. I’m just going to wear the maternity clothes I have from my first pregnancy and that will have to do. (There seems to be even less selection in stores than there is typically which isn’t great to begin with). But new somewhat on trend accessories would be awesome!
Anonymous says
For shoes, lug-sole loafers seem to be the thing.
Anonanonanon says
They do seem to be a thing and I just can’t accept it yet. I was clomping around in those in the late 90s/early 2000s as a pre-teen (yes, CLOMPING) so I just can’t go there yet. I went with classic horsebit loafers instead (which, when worn with ankle pants, a gold necklace, and a cashmere sweater, my husband says makes me look like I stole my outfit from some slim European man)
ElisaR says
ha! sounds cute. where do they come up with these analogies? My guy really comes up with some doozies “you look like a Russian diplomat”. ummmmm ok?
anne-on says
You say that like it’s a bad thing? I live in New England and I’m swapping from pointed toe Rothy’s to loafers but otherwise that’s very much my go to work uniform. It’s a classic!
anon says
Lmao I jumped on the fanny pack bandwagon because it’s honestly so handy with little kids but no so little that I always need a full diaper bag. Highly recommend! But, wow can I not get back on board for some of these trends. I’ll keep my side part and skinny jeans, and be glad I live in the not-so-trendy midwest burbs and work from home.
No Face says
If you like Anthro, then go and buy what you like!
There are a couple of shops in my city that sell locally made or fair trade jewelry, and I buy my jewelry there. It is never precisely on trend or out of style. I get a lot of compliments because it rarely looks like anyone else’s jewelry.
Cb says
Ooh, that’s a good idea! We have a fair trade shop that’s on my way back from the airport tomorrow. I kind of just want a solid colour wooden bead? I’m an academic so I can embrace something a bit more zany.
No Face says
That’s exactly the type of thing I’m talking about. Lots of wood, glass, and non-precious metal pieces.
Anon says
I feel like the current business fashion is old male professor. Loafers or other flat-soled shoes, straight leg pants, a nicer sweater or vest or mens-cut blazer over a button down, medium belt, and minimal but not dainty jewelry. All in very 70s colors. With some kind of stripe or small dotted/quirky pattern somewhere.
anne-on says
I am SUPER psyched to wear a plaid wool slouchy blazer with elbow patches I got on clearance from Brooks Brothers last year. I am also VERY much here for the vests over blouse look, that was my very favorite piece from my 90s middle school closet.
Anonanonanon says
Yes and I’m here for the old male professor vibe
Realist says
Just to follow up on the piece from today, I have two longer necklaces from Kendra Scott that I really like. The piece featured today is not my favorite but her collections are nice and worth checking out if you can get them shipped to you.
Anon Lawyer says
I just learned about her from #BamaRush, which I was kind of obsessed with.
Allie says
If you’re going to do costume jewelry you can also buy them used on poshmark. I like to search by brand (anthropologie and jcrew are probably a solid start). Does 1000 villages ship to you? That’s another source of costume jewelry that skews to unique and ethical but is still affordable.
TheElms says
Is any of this on trend? (I happen to have a Loft gift card). Also it seems like gold is in over silver at the moment, true?
https://www.loft.com/hammered-drop-hoop-earrings/576346?=undefined&selectedColor=3019
https://www.loft.com/double-link-drop-earrings/553354?=undefined&selectedColor=6090
https://www.loft.com/interlocked-necklace/573780?=undefined&selectedColor=3019
Allie says
I think the last one is. Definitely in a layered gold moment.
Anon says
My school board election is today, and I’m having a hard time. We have candidates who are running on an anti-DEI (dressed as CRT) and anti-science platform. They say outlandish, outrageous things and people seem to love it. We have had a pretty right leaning board – e.g. masks mandatory in elementary school but easy exemption process. My kids wear masks but I could live with the compromise, even though I didn’t love it. Now it is set to go even farther, and I’m worried about what comes next.
Realist says
Thank you for being informed and voting. I’m so sorry for this happening in your town and so many others. The loudest voices don’t necessarily represent the majority (despite them screaming about being the “silent” majority, eyeroll). It is so scary. Please text all your reasonable, local friends and acquaintances to remind them to vote and put in a word on why you voted for your preferred candidates.
Cb says
Ugh, that sounds stressful. How do you think it impacts classroom teaching? I saw that list of words teachers in one state were banned from using!
I’ve been sounding out co-workers about where their kids go to school in case we end up moving and it is so so tricky. The public schools are either Protestant OR Catholic, and the only secular private school is Steiner, which feels too hippy-dippy, even for me. I just want to send my kid to a decent school within walking distance…
ifiknew says
When will my 4.5 year old be able to wipe her bottom well? She always tries but I always check and it’s rarely clean the first time. Also, I bathe her and my 2.5 year old together. When can she shower on her own / is it weird to bathe with brother? She also can brush her teeth on her own, but I also try to help atleast once a day to make sure it’s done well..
Also, my husband thinks my 2.5 year old needs to be only drinking from open cups rather than straw/sippies and should be done with sleep sacks. I’m in no rush. Is he right?
Anon says
well my 3.5 year old twins still drink from straw cups (otherwise my house would be covered in water) and were 100% in sleep sacks until recently when they now choose between sleep sack and blanket (they switch off which they choose). why does your 2.5 year old need to be done with those things?
Anonymous says
If your 2.5-year-old is ready to climb out of the crib or is in a toddler bed or regular bed, I’d ditch the sleep sacks as a safety issue.
We got rid of sippies at 12 months but kept straw cups much longer because even grown-ups drink from straws, and day care only provided open cups after 24 months so we knew she was capable of drinking from an open cup.
A 4.5-year-old should be able to wipe just fine. It might be easier with a wet wipe. I’ve been meaning to try the Fresh Peaches TP Gel, which eliminates the environmental concerns associated with wet wipes.
4.5 is old enough to have her try showering on her own. You might still need to help a bit with hair washing. If it doesn’t work out, try again in a couple of months. Make sure you have a nonskid mat or appliques and a tub spout cover. I would not bathe a 4-year-old with another child regardless of gender, but I am bigger on privacy than many parents.
Anonymous says
It will vary by kid but around age 6- 7 they might want you to check but it’s rare you have to wipe extra.
Totally fine to bathe them together. Around age 6 older kid may show some body shyness. We stopped bathing the twins together when they didn’t fit in the tub easily together which was around 4-5.
Sleep sacks and straw cups are fine at 2.5. As long as they get chances to practice with open cups, I don’t see the need to ditch straw or supply cups entirely. Around age 4 we stopped using straw-sippy cups for anything except water. We use ceramic mugs and stainless steel straws as our kids water cups at dinner time even at elementary age.
Anonymous says
How do you check without wiping extra?!?
Anonymous says
You look at their bottom?
Anon says
My 4YO can’t yet. She just started showering this week. On her own is a stretch, someone basically walks her through each step, and we turn the water off and one of us does her hair and helps her rinse it, but hey, steps in the right direction and my back greatly appreciates not bending over the tub! She uses a mix of open cups, straw cups, water bottles and miracle 360 cups. We ditched sleep sacks at 17 months when DD climbed out of her crib in one, but if your kid is still happy, I’d keep them until nighttime potty training.
So Anon says
Personally, I think it is fine to bathe the kids together at those ages. At some point, one of the kids will start showing some signs of wanting privacy in the bathroom, and that it when I stopped bathing my kids together.
As for the open cups, maybe it is just that my kids and I are totally uncoordinated and have a huge dog who knocks cups off of surfaces with her giant tail, but we will use lids in my house. We moved from true sippy cups to mason jars with reusable lids and straws, and I keep my water bottle with me most of the time. They all have lids. My kids use open cups at the table for dinner, but otherwise, the house rule is that any cup/water bottle has to have a lid. For the record, my kids are 8, 10 and I am 40 (and just dumped coffee on myself this morning).
Anonymous says
re: wiping – I think it is kid dependent. My son is…not fastidious and the skid marks lasted for years, although he also had frequent # 2 accidents. He still tries to get away without wiping sometimes (age 9). He can shower alone but get scared being in the bathroom alone in the evening (our apartment has a windowless upstairs hallway that just spooks him, even with the lights on). He still benefits from reminders/coaching because he really doesn’t care if he gets clean.
Anonymous says
1. Don’t know on wiping.
2. I think bathing together is fine at these ages, and frankly I find it easier than managing two separate baths or showers.
3. Dentist told my 4yo to brush herself than have a grownup brush.
4. Straws and sippies are different. I think sippies aren’t great for their teeth, so I’d ditch those, but fine with straw cups. If your husband thinks only open cups, he can clean up all the messes from spills. You could also check out 360 cups.
5. If kid is still willing to go into a sleep sack and isn’t trying to climb in it, I’d use as long as possible.
Anon318 says
On the straw cup issue – my daughter’s speech therapist actually recommends the use of straw cups for pre-grade school children. Something about regularly engaging muscles in the back of the mouth that little kids often get lazy about using when speaking.
anon says
My 4.5yos can wipe, but only because we forced them to learn before starting school this year because there was no one there to help. There’s no way they’d be able to shower on their own (or brush their teeth) so we do both of those things.
Anonymous says
This. Most 4.5-year-olds are in pre-K, so they need to be able to wipe because no one is going to help them. We taught wiping as part of potty training, and our day care had them wiping for themselves too.
Anon says
It’s completely normal for preschool/daycare teachers to assist with wiping. Kids need to use the bathroom independently by kindergarten.
Anonymous says
Agree. There is a difference between encouraging kids to wipe themselves first then checking if extra is needed cause zero involvement in toileting. In our area, Kindergarten is the start of zero involvement in toileting. This usually just resulted in my kids holding #2 until they got home.
Anonymous says
Ugh hoping my kiddo doesn’t start holding #2. Preschool started early in the fall telling them they have to start wiping themselves to prepare for K, so hopefully they’ll get it by then!
Anon says
Yeah, I’m in the first Anon and my kids are in preK in a public school, which is why they need to be completely independent (for many kids this isn’t required until K). Teachers are not allowed in the kids’ bathrooms.
Anon says
My 3.5 year old still uses sippy cups on the go – she can drink fine from an open cup and we use them at home and at school, but when we’re traveling or going on a car ride, a sippy is so much more convenient. Adults use water bottles when we’re out and about too, I don’t think it’s that big a deal as long as it’s occasional use.
My kid voluntarily gave up sleep sacks a while ago, I can’t remember the exact age but I want to say it was around the time she turned 3. She was not a climber so we had no safety worries and would have happily had her in sleep sacks until elementary school (we bought giant Woolino ones) but she decided she was done.
We still wipe her and supervise teeth brushing, although she does a pretty good job brushing on her own.
Anonymous says
My 4.5yo can do it fine with “flushable” wipes but it seems like 5 is the norm. Still have skid marks sometimes. Something with their arm reach and coordination. She does call me if she needs help. I let both my kids use straw cups (I use them too!) but I know they can drink fine out of any open cup.
Anon says
DH just microwaved fish, for brunch, and now our entire kitchen reeks like a marooned fishing boat. Wishing I had gone to the office today, but have appointments keeping me at home.
Anonymous says
The only thing worse than microwaving fish is microwaving fish before noon.
Cb says
Oh no, DH is your bad co-worker!
Anon says
does anyone else’s kids have night terrors? my 3.5 year old does and they are so scary. and disruptive to the entire household’s sleeping. any tips on how to deal with them?
Cb says
My son does at age 4, but not lately knock on wood. I find they happen more frequently if he’s not gone for a potty before bed (and we’ve had times where he’s woken up screaming and then had a massive accident). It’s like something is disrupting his sleep.
I think you just have to ride them out once you’ve adjusted environmental factors. I had TERRIBLE night terrors as a kid, triggered by the Oakland Hills fires, and even now, I have bad nightmares.
Anon says
thanks. it is so hard bc kiddo shares a room and so other kiddo also ends up with disrupted sleep and gets hysterical.
AwayEmily says
Mine had them — they peaked at around 18months – 2.5 and have decreased since then. He’s now almost 4 and we’re down to once every three months or so. Honestly, they ended fastest when we left him totally alone (that was our pediatrician’s advice), but now he shares a room with his sister so to avoid waking her up, we generally bring him into our room with us and let him thrash around until it’s over. My husband is more bothered by them than I am so he often tries to wake him up so he’ll snap out of it. I prefer to just ride it out.
I haven’t noticed any particular triggers. They always happen at the same time (about two hours after he goes to sleep). It sucks but I just try to remember that it will pass.
Anon says
thanks. we also have a room sharing situation. i’d like to try getting kiddo out before waking sibling, but if sibling wakes up, and other sibling is not there, she also gets hysterical and then i have two hysterical children on my hands. DH is the best at handling the night terrors, but last night when it happened he wasn’t home from work yet and it lasted 40-50 minutes
anon says
Yep, they’re awful. For my kid it peaked around 2.5/3 and then mostly stopped, though we’ve gotten more at 4.5 lately. As far as we can tell, they’re triggered when she’s overtired.
And there really isn’t anything you can do to deal with them, unfortunately. They usually happen within an hour or two after she falls asleep, so at least the grownups are already awake, but for the most part we just leave her alone and let her scream it out. Usually her sister will sleep through the chaos, but if she wakes up we’ll do the same thing as AwayEmily and bring the screaming kid into our room until she settles.
So Anon says
My son had night terrors that he has thankfully grown out of, but he still talks in his sleep. From my experience and from the advice of my pediatrician, the best thing you can do is to be a calm presence but don’t try and wake them up fully. Kids in this state aren’t really awake and don’t remember it the next morning. Waking them up makes the whole incident last longer. I would walk in, and lay a hand on my son’s back until he settled back down. If I tried to wake him up, he became more upset then was fully awake and it took forever for him to settle back down. It is more distressing for the parent than the kid. If your kiddos share a room, I would take the one with the night terror to another room, quietly and calmly without trying to further wake the kiddo until they are through the episode.
Same says
I was just coming on here to ask whether 15 month olds can have night terrors! It’s horrible!
Anon says
I had night terrors and still did as an adult. Sleep neurologist was pretty helpful. Now I do some things to get extra choline to help with smoother sleep transitions.
Anonymous says
My birthday is coming up soon, and everything on my wish list is either backordered or not feasible at the moment. My poor husband is frustrated and wants something he can give me to unwrap on my actual birthday. How can I convince him that it’s okay to wait for what I really want? I have suggested a nice takeout dinner, cake, and some family activities that would be a fun way to celebrate, but he wants a gift I can open too.
Anonymous says
I usually suggest some consumables – bath bombs, a few different beers/wine from
Microbreweries/wineries, fancy food – local honey, jam, chocolate etc. Like a surprise basket of different things to try but give him a theme – like bath bombs from Lush or whatever applicable shop.
Cb says
What about books? My birthday formula is sushi takeaway, vegan chocolate cake, flowers, and selection of new novels.
AwayEmily says
I have a similar husband — he always really wants me to have something to “open,” even if he’s also getting me what I really want (an experience gift). My solution is to ask for things that can be purchased in-person, preferably consumables. For example: a specific type of beer from a local brewery, fancy chocolate bar from Whole Foods, a “fancy” bottle of wine, etc. He feels like he’s getting me a “real gift” in addition to experiences and I get something I actually want. Win-win!
anne-on says
Is there a small but nicer version of a ‘consumable’ he can wrap for you? A fancy lipstick or roller of your favorite perfume? A gift card for a mani/pedi or massage? A physical copy of a book?
I love burning candles in the winter and I just ordered the candle cloche and candle care set from https://lumaandco.com/. Sydney Hale makes wonderful candles that ship quickly. I have also asked for a specialty dessert that I can only get via goldbelly before for birthdays and that felt very special.
Anon says
We haven’t seen dhs grandmother in two years and I’d like us to! This is on him! I finally laid out that kids are out of school week of thanksgiving, between Christmas and New Years, MLK, Presidents’ Day, spring break and Easter weekend. Last night he told me he finally got it worked out (based on MILs work schedule and we’ll visit Monday to Saturday of Presidents’ Day weekend. It’s not a cost thing.
I don’t know why I’m so annoyed – the kids are young and can miss school. I’m returning from maternity leave at the end of December so maybe I’m concerned about taking a week for Presidents’ Day and a week for spring break three weeks later? My job is totally in the office but has always been sort of an honor system on vacations of take how much you feel comfortable? We could also just not travel for spring break? I was just really seeing this as a long weekend with an extra day sort of thing.
Help me think through this. FWIW DH works insane hours and never takes vacation – I’m a bit confused how he plans to take a week off twice so close together…
In laws also haven’t made plans to fly down and meet newest grandkid even though she’s six weeks old and they’re an hour and a half flight away and don’t mind traveling during COVID. Maybe a blessing since I don’t want baby to get sick but they haven’t even tried – I think I’m just annoyed that I feel like I’m getting this almost ultimatum. And it’s disruptive. I want to re establish good will when I’m back at work.
Anon says
Can he take the kids alone and you join for just the weekend? I refuse to burn large quantities of vacation days visiting my in-laws. It’s not vacation for me and it’s not how I want to spend precious vacation days. However DH is free to take our child to them as much as he wants, and I join sometimes over holiday weekends. And of course they can visit us.
Op says
Yeah, I think you’re right. I’m not super pleased with them right now anyways (just very little effort to see their grandkids usually – we generally buy them tickets and finally they come down even though they can totally afford them). I’d love to visit his grandmother though! We have four kids so I wouldn’t leave him with the kids, but I think this is the root of the problem.
Cb says
Yeah, that’s what I do. I like my MILs but in limited quantities, so husband takes kiddo down or they come to “help” when I’m travelling.
CCLA says
Totally this. Sounds like you made it clear when kids were out of school (which, he should know anyway) and he just…picked school/work days anyway? Working around MIL schedule but not asking about yours? Nope, try again, or go alone.
Anonymous says
It sounds as if you offered President’s Day as a good option, so I am confused as to why you are annoyed.
OP says
I assumed it would be Friday to Monday, not Monday to Friday (take kids out of school one day instead of four and have it be over a weekend rather than the week)
SC says
I would propose letting him take your older kid to visit in-laws for the entire week, and then you joining with new baby for a long weekend. Your older kid can get some solo time with dad and grandparents. And you don’t have to miss a whole week of work.
Anonymous says
I think the ideas here are good: Let him go with the older kids, and then you join with the baby for the weekend.
But in general, I am here for your rant. We just went through this with scheduling MIL’s spring visit. It didn’t even occur to DH to LOOK AT THE SCHOOL CALENDAR. And so now MIL is visiting two weeks AFTER spring break, when taking additional time off is going to be difficult, if not impossible. I mean, come on. Then it becomes my job to figure out all the childcare.
Variations on this theme happen all the time with my in-laws, and somehow our family–you know, the one with two working parents and small children on different school schedules–ends up having to rearrange our lives for people who are retired, etc etc.
OP says
Solidarity!!!
CPA Lady says
Want to hear a funny story about how having a kid makes you lose your marbles from time to time?
So the background is that my sister and I were raised by a white lady version of a tiger mom. Academics were our number one priority, they came before everything, there was an immense amount of pressure, only a 4.0 was acceptable, we aced all our standardized tests, graduated from great colleges with honors, blah blah blah. We were both very burned out by this experience and have had many conversations where we have vowed to each other to never to put this amount of pressure on our kids.
Fast forward to the end of last week and I get a letter sent home in kiddo’s folder about standardized test scores. So I look at the two page print out of the results behind the letter and they are HORRIBLE. Like, shockingly horrible given everything we know about our child’s academic history. Out of the 18 things they measure, she got the worst possible score on 9 of them, the next to worst possible score on 7 of them, and a mediocre score on 2 of them. I go into a spiral. I blame myself for all the TV I let her watch during covid-times, I blame myself for not reading to her more. I wonder where I went wrong as a parent. I wonder if she has ADHD too (I have been thinking she does) and it’s suddenly gotten way worse. I wonder if my not as great math skills have paired with my husbands not as great verbal skills and we have somehow produced a child that has inherited the worst of each of our academic abilities. I start thinking that maybe my mom was right after all, and I need to get flash cards and a tutor. I text two of my teacher friends and get them to talk me down. I almost got my actual tiger mom friend to send me the name of her child’s tutor. [and yes, I absolutely knew in the moment that I was being a teensy tinesy bit over dramatic]
And then I look the scores print out again today and see that it has another kid’s name at the top. And then I see a message from the teacher in class dojo that her student teacher just saw the cover letter on the top and didn’t realize each individual student’s test scores were behind the letter and that each letter needed to go into a specific child’s folder, and she’s very sorry but could we all send back the test score letters so they can be distributed to the proper child.
So that was my fun absolutely pointless emotional roller coaster for the weekend. So I thought I should share so you could laugh with me at my absurd meltdown over nothing.
Anon says
I am totally laughing with you, not at you, because I can totally see myself doing the same thing but this is HILARIOUS! That poor student teacher must feel so awful. Also raised by white (Jewish) tiger parents who would ask “was there no extra credit?” when I came home with 100 on a test, and also want a more relaxed experience for my kid, so solidarity.
anon says
Oh no! I would be alarmed too if this was way out of line with my LO’s normal academic performance. But, it’s worth noting that even if your kiddo DID do “horribly” on one test that there could be so many factors as to why, and many would have little to no reflection on your parenting. Different kids, different development timelines, disabilities, and off day, etc. etc. etc.
TheElms says
Oh I love this, thank you so much for posting!
Anonymous says
This post made me want to be friends with you IRL. I have a four year old whose peers are already being pressured into private school (eye roll) and twin 9 month olds so the sleep deprivation runs deep. I did a lot of smiling, nodding and internal screaming at the last day care parent meeting where the poopcups were wringing their hands about kindergarten.
anne-on says
Working at home today and my husband and son are both out running errands. I’m freaking out slightly as I can hear very soft ‘shush’ type noises in the supposed to be empty house. I open the door to find the kitten, very very gently batting a leftover balloon from our Halloween party up and down the hallway. And then yes, I had to stop what I was working on to watch the kitten very sweetly play with a balloon that is quite literally larger than she is.
We’ve also learned after freaking out about ‘losing’ said kitten that she enjoys burrowing under the covers to nap (and is only 6 pounds, so she just looks like a lump on my kid’s badly made bed) AND is small enough to army crawl under all of the dressers and then pounce on the feet of the unsuspecting.
In short, cats are not good for your cardiac health…
AwayEmily says
oh man these stories made my day. Totally adorable. Cats are the best.
Anon says
I know it’s been discussed before, but favorite movies for a sensitive preschooler? So far we’ve watched Nemo (skipped the beginning) which she likes, Frozen which was ok (I don’t think she fully processed the part about the parents dying…my kid doesn’t seem to follow movie plots super well), Toy Story (deemed too boring but it was a while ago so maybe we should try again?) and Enchanted (the live action Amy Adams-Patrick Dempsey movie) which she didn’t fully follow but loved (the singing and dancing rats were a big hit).
GCA says
Definitely Cars. Maybe Moana, but watch for one slightly scary bit near the end. Mary Poppins?
Anonymous says
Well… my extremely sensitive then-preschooler found the drama and tension in the racing scenes, and any crashes, TOTALLY OVERWHELMING. Enough so that we couldn’t try again till he was almost 6. If your child is this level of sensitive, we did have success with Sing in preschool. But movies besides Sing just didn’t really work until kindergarten. All loooooot of Mr. Rogers for that one.
AwayEmily says
My kids (3.5 and 5.5) are on the extreme side of finding things too scary (they kind of egg each other on) so our options are super limited. Nemo and Cars were both deemed “too scary.” We’ve had the best luck with the Winnie the Pooh movies on Disney Plus. They were okay with Moana for like two viewings and then decided it was too much and now won’t watch any more. We also sometimes do the movies that are basically extended TV shows — there are a couple of Sesame Street ones and some Octonaut ones, I think.
SC says
My son is a sensitive kid! He’s 6 now and still not into scary or intense movies. Here are some of the movies he’s enjoyed: Robin Hood, Sword in the Stone, The Jungle Book, Winnie the Pooh and every movie and special involving Winnie the Pooh, Finding Dori, all three Cars movies, all the Curious George movies and holiday specials, the Mickey and Minnie movies where there are several shorter stories, Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, Fantasia (seriously), Mary Poppins, Ratatouille, Pinocchio, Sing, Shrek.
Not a success: The Incredibles and, especially, The Incredibles 2, Moana (or turn it off before the lava monster), Brave, 101 Dalmatians, Soul, Frozen (but Frozen 2 was better), Lion King. Basically, the most interesting ones. Conflict drives plot, but my son hates conflict!
Also, kids are weird, and somehow mine did not find Aladdin or its giant snake to be scary. I’m not recommending Aladdin, but just a reminder that you really never know what will and won’t scare them.
EDAnon says
My child was completely traumatized by the opening to Incredibles 2. I don’t know that he will ever watch it.
SC says
For mine, it was the Elastigirl vs Screensaver fight. Bad guy in a scary mask, flashing black and white lights–it was just too much.
Anonymous says
The only thing I remember about Incredibles 2 is the Jack-Jack and raccoon brawl, which is one of my favorite movie scenes of all time.
Anonymous says
I wrote in above re my child being scared of Cars- it sounds like your child is my now-6 year old’s twin!! Those are all great movies for him now BUT not till about age 5. We just watched The Sword In the Stone this weekend- great for 6, but my 3 year old couldn’t follow it at all and wandered off.
EDAnon says
We do a lot of the PBS kids “movies” that are more like an hour long episode. My preschooler likes Superhero Elementary, Ready Jet Go, Wild Kratts (the shows that feature older characters).
anon says
Cars, Cars 2, Planes, and Planes Fire & Rescue – all great, fairly uncontroversial.
Anonymous says
My kids (8 and 4.5) both really enjoy the Zombies movie on Disney Plus. There are one or two scenes where the zombie characters become more monster-like, but my 4.5 wasn’t scared (and he’s much more sensitive than our older kid was at his age). Also on Disney — Soul and Luca have been big hits. I don’t recall any particularly scary/upsetting scenes in either. There’s also the remake of Cinderella — on Netflix maybe? Or Amazon prime?
Anonymous says
My older kid found Soul and Luca both sad.
FVNC says
Oh, I agree! I cry watching Soul every time. But my 4.5 yr old doesn’t fully get the sad party (yet?).