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Eileen Fisher is another brand that, I’m learning, has an entire line of washable items marketed as such. This jersey shift dress looks simple but, I suspect, is well made enough that it’ll hold up well for quite some time, which hopefully makes up for the fact that they’re all a bit pricier than your standard ponte dress. This one is $198; there’s a lovely plus-size one with 3/4 sleeves that is marked down to $130 (and a slightly different one at $142). Eileen Fisher Washable Sleeveless Jersey Shift Dress
Sales of note for 9.10.24
(See all of the latest workwear sales at Corporette!)
- Ann Taylor – 30% off your purchase
- Banana Republic Factory – Up to 50% off everything + extra 20% off
- Boden – 15% off new styles
- Eloquii – $29 and up select styles; up to 50% off everything else
- J.Crew – Up to 50% off wear-to-work styles; extra 30% off sale styles
- J.Crew Factory – 40-60% off everything; extra 60% off clearance
- Lands’ End – 30% off full-price styles
- Loft – Extra 40% off sale styles
- Talbots – BOGO 50% everything, includes markdowns
- Zappos – 26,000+ women’s sale items! (check out these reader-favorite workwear brands on sale, and some of our favorite kids’ shoe brands on sale)
Kid/Family Sales
- Carter’s – Birthday sale, 40-50% off & extra 20% off select styles
- Hanna Andersson – Up to 50% off all baby; up to 40% off all Halloween
- J.Crew Crewcuts – Extra 30% off sale styles
- Old Navy – 40% off everything
- Target – BOGO 25% off select haircare, up to 25% off floor care items; up to 30% off indoor furniture up to 20% off TVs
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And — here are some of our latest threadjacks of interest – working mom questions asked by the commenters!
- The concept of “backup care” is so stupid…
- I need tips on managing employees in BigLaw who have to leave for daycare pickup…
- I’m thinking of leaning out to spend more time with my family – how can I find the perfect job for that?
- I’m now a SAHM and my husband needs to step up…
- How can I change my thinking to better recognize some of my husband’s contributions as important, like organizing the shed?
- What are your tips to having a good weekend with kids, especially with little kids? Do you have a set routine or plan?
Button-front shirts for the busty says
I am pregnant, due with my first later this year, and trying to stock up now on nursing-friendly tops. I want to get a few button-front shirts, but I am very well-endowed (currently a G, and expect to go up a size or two), and due to my belly, I can’t try any non-maternity button-fronts right now. I’d like not to spend a ton of money on these — think Gap / Old Navy prices. Any advice on brands / cuts / sizes? Thanks!
Anonymous says
I found buttons to be a pain while breastfeeding because your breasts change sizes depending on how long you’ve gone between feedings. I had a few embarrassing incidents at work coming out of s meeting and realizing the buttons had popped open! I had better luck with flowy drapey tops that I could lift up. To keep your middle covered there are nursing tanks or bands of fabric that can be worn under your shirt and keep exposure to a minimum.
hoola hoopa says
+1 to everything. I also don’t find button ups flattering or convenient (all those buttons to undo and redo…)
For larger cup sizes, I strongly recommend bravado. I’m a G when nursing and they are comfortable and surprisingly supportive. I lived in them at home. At work, I generally wore a good nursing bra (rec: Anita) and an adjustable strap cami fully extended so that I could pull down below the bust (rec: Halogen) under regular, loose top.
NewMomAnon says
Are you looking for nursing friendly shirts, or pumping friendly shirts? For pumping, I second the earlier commenter; I prefer silky shirts that I can lift up, not button-fronts. I like my button-front shirts to be pretty tailored, and there isn’t any way to accomplish that with my ever-changing bust right now. I got some new ones from Target and Penney’s during sales, but managed to raid my pre-pregnancy clothes and had a good selection already there. The only thing you absolutely need for pumping is a hands-free pumping bra. I like the Lansinoh one because it has velcro in the back so I can adjust it to basically any size.
For nursing at home, I wear a nursing tank with an open cardigan, so you could stock up on those during sales now (buy several sizes of nursing tanks, you’ll need them all for the postpartum weight loss). For nursing while out and about, look at H&M; I really like their nursing tops and sometimes they go on sale. I found Gap’s nursing tops to be really big and unstructured, which I didn’t like (made me feel like I was still wearing maternity clothes). Japanese Weekend also has some cute tops and dresses marked “d&a” (for during and after) that I wore during pregnancy and continue to wear for nursing. Note that “nursing tops” are usually *not* pumping friendly.
NewMomAnon says
Should clarify – I got new silky drapey tops from Target and Penney’s, and found a bunch in my prepregnancy clothes. I thought I’d wear all the button downs and put them in my closet when I went back to work, but I almost never wear them.
eh230 says
If you want more casual button downs, check out loft. They have a bunch of knit cotton tops in lots of colors and in stripes that are cute and comfortable. I am a 34 G, and the petite large fits me fine.
pockets says
I actually really like Eileen Fisher for maternity wear as I felt that the pieces were meant to drape to conceal less-than-ideal midsections. Something like this: http://shop.nordstrom.com/s/eileen-fisher-scoop-neck-silk-tunic-regular-petite/3767943 got me through the last few months (and was also good post-partum when you still look weird but don’t want to wear maternity clothing that highlights the remaining bump).
On the same theme I haven’t had luck with Eileen Fisher dresses. The midsection is too thick and not defined enough for me.
hoola hoopa says
+1 for EF as maternity wear!
I really like them post-partum as well. Even though my non-maternity/post-partum figure is hourglass and I agree they are generally not flattering, I get a *lot* of wear out of a few items belted.
For a budget version of the style (with washability!), I like J Jill.
AEK says
I was going to second this with a J-Jill rec. It’s *the* place for flowy tops and tunics; some of it might as well be maternity, but the fabrics are pretty good compared to super cheapo places. The Outlet sections has really helped me stretch the wardrobe on a budget.
AEK says
Speaking of which, I was actually thinking of using a J Jill v-neck T-shirt dress as a nightgown at the hospital for after delivery. Or am I going to want something with better bre*st access?
Anonymous says
Not responsive to the question you asked, but relevant: do you care about ruining the dress? If so, don’t use it. Use the hospital gown in case you are like me and bleed through 3 of them the night after giving birth. (ETA: sorry if this is TMI.)
hoola hoopa says
If you plan to breastfeed, you’ll definitely want better bre@st access.
AEK says
Good thoughts, thanks. I don’t care about it getting yucky; it’s not something I’d ever wear outside the house (“dress” is a real overstatement— it’s just a long v-neck). But I do want to brea*stfeed. Was just hoping to avoid buying something new, especially given the issues Anonymous raises. I guess I need something with real nursing access.
EB0220 says
This is a bit off-topic, but this is the best community I can think of for this discussion. I am wondering about your parenting philosophies related to money. Do you worry about spoiling your kids? We are a dual income household with two kids, and still seem to have plenty of “fun” money even after bills & savings. We spend plenty of time together as a family, so we’re not using “stuff” in place of quality parenting time. I still worry. Any thoughts or solutions?
KJ says
My baby is still a baby, so it hasn’t come up in practice, but I have given this a lot of thought. I grew up in modest circumstances, and I want my daughter to know the value of a dollar and what it means to work and save for things. How I will put this into practice, I’m not sure. Maybe if there is a big ticket item she wants we will offer to pay half and give her the opportunity to do chores to earn the other half? I’m interested to hear others answers to this.
HM says
I worry about it, but recognize that part of the reason I work is to provide nice things for my child. Granted, we’ve only just begun this journey, so we’ll see how life pans out.
I think setting boundaries, both for yourself, other giftgivers (grandparents), and setting expectations for the kids is also a good plan. For example, for Christmas I recently from a friend who follows this philosophy:
– Stocking (candy, small toys) + 1 big gift from Santa
– From parents – something to you want, something you need, something to wear, and something to read.
– For giftgivers – presents must be cleared with parents, who hold veto power.
I also think spending money on experiences rather than stuff will reduce the “gimmies.”
Instilling a charitable spirit in kids goes a long way too. I was raised to commit to long-term volunteering efforts, as well as assist in one-offs.
Lastly, I plan to provide an allowance for children to make their own financial decisions (saving for the game system, donating money to a charity dear to their hearts).
Again, we just started out on this journey, so we’ll see if I can live up to this idea!
Nonny says
My daughter is still a baby so this hasn’t really come up yet…but following this discussion with great interest.
Lyssa says
I was raised in a situation where money was always very tight, too, and this is something that I worry about a lot as well. I’m even a little torn about creating college savings, on the grounds that my siblings and I had to earn it and I think that it was better that way (I earned a full scholarship). (I’m thinking about a secret savings plan – let him think that he has to earn it, but have it ready to fill in where needed, or maybe gift out a substantial chunk of student loans or something). (BTW, my state has full tuition for state schools through the lottery, so there’s that available, too.)
We also have the mostly positive issue of having both sets of grandparents very able to buy, buy, buy things that they couldn’t when we were kids, so even though we buy him almost nothing, he is still drowning in toys. I’m not sure how we’ll handle it as he gets older, but I definitely want to make sure that he is putting some efforts into big items and that sort of thing. I also want to make sure that he understands that, even if we live in a nice house and drive nice cars and such, sometimes you have to and can make do on less than ideal things (as we definitely did when I was a kid), but I’m not sure how to teach that. I’m very interested in hearing what others have to say about this.
CHJ says
We’re also fairly new to this, but I hope I can follow my parents’ model in two ways. First, whenever we would go on a trip or to a museum, etc., they would give each of us a certain amount of money to spend however we wanted. So perhaps $20 for a day at an air & space museum. We could spend that at the gift shop, on ice cream, on fun ride things outside, whatever we wanted. But it made us have to choose what we wanted carefully and not be constantly asking them to buy us things.
The second thing my mom would do would be to let us buy one thing at the grocery store that we wanted. (She had some veto power, so a jumbo bag of candy might be out, but a single candy bar was fine). We would spend all our time at the store carefully selecting our item. So in both of these cases, we were given some treats, but we weren’t given everything we asked for. I thought it was a good model and hope I can follow it once my son is old enough to ask for things!
Spirograph says
I like this, because it teaches prioritizing and budgeting while still allowing for fun! My family just did not buy things at museums and similar places, full stop. Not food (we brought sandwiches), not gift shop stuff. We weren’t wealthy, but definitely could have afforded little treats like this. I don’t think I ever felt resentful about it; by the time I was old enough to notice, I knew better than to ask… but I was 20 years old the first time I had cotton candy. My husband’s family was the opposite, and he can’t even go grocery shopping with my son without buying him a balloon or a treat. I have been trying to think of a way to rein that in… totally going to steal your parents’ tactic.
Meg Murry says
I worry about spoiling my kids a lot, especially now that my older son is 7. We do a lot of discussion about money when we are in the car – for instance, explaining that in order to get money OUT of the bank with our ATM cards, we have to put money in every month, and that Mommy and Daddy get paid at our jobs and that is how the money goes in, that every time we swipe our credit card we get a bill for it at the end of the month and that money has to come out of the bank, etc. We also talk about making choices and trade-offs – for instance, we live in a larger house than some of his friends (because we got an incredible deal on an older home, but that’s a different story) but we don’t go on vacations as often as those friends because that is how our family chooses to prioritize – and one way isn’t better or worse than the other, its just what makes that family happy. We’ve also given my son “loans” for a few items he’s wanted to buy when he didn’t have the money, and discussed the concept of bank loans and mortgages with him – how we didn’t have all the money to buy our house, so the bank paid for the house and every month we pay it back. We are landlords and my husband runs his own business, so we also discuss renting vs buying, etc. We also allow him to earn money through chores for things like apps for his tablet (which is one of the big grandparent gifts that we had to think hard about before letting them buy it).
In the end though, our problem is similar to what a lot of posters have mentioned – my husband and I grew up with fairly modest means, and now our parents are more well off and want to spoil our kids with the things they couldn’t buy us. We try to encourage experience gifts over “things” and have also found that since our families live locally, encouraging the grandparents to buy toys and books that will stay at Grandma & Grandpa’s house greatly decreases the number of toys that enter our house. And after one experience with a beeping-blooping never shut up toy that we made stay at my MILs house, she has gotten much more thoughtful about the annoyance factor of the gifts she buys our kids.
anon says
We just instituted a policy that if a toy comes into the house and makes noise and does NOT have an off switch, it must come accompanied by a bottle of wine.
anon for this says
This is a work in progress for us too. We both have good jobs so living within our means is an admittedly comfortable lifestyle. And we try to spend more money on experiences rather than stuff. At the same time, I think we want to model for our child that a large part of this lifestyle comes from working hard and making fiscally sound decisions. Having just one child does make a difference financially. We’ve already introduced the family chores concept and will introduce allowance/savings concepts soon. Our child also is learning about volunteering and that not everyone has the same lifestyle.
I will say that one area that DH and I feel strongly responsible for is education. We both got out of school without mountains of debt. Part of it was our own doing with scholarships, part of it was picking well-priced schools, and part of it was the support of our families. Being able to give our child the same gift is a goal of ours.
JJ says
Great discussion. I think we’re very similar to you, anon for this. My oldest is 2.5 years old, so we have a way to go, but we try to explain that working hard is important. I was blessed and lucky that my family was well off. My parents believed that the best thing they could do for us was to provide the best education possible. They always told us that they would pay for college, but we were on our own after that (which is very much not the norm, sadly, among their friends and people we grew up with). We also always had to either be playing sports year-round or have a job. We also had an allowance that we had to earn through extra chores (normal chores were expected). And finally, they made sure that we understood the importance of volunteering and giving time and money to charity.
Now, we focus a lot on experiences versus gifts. I can count on one hand the number of times we’ve taken both our kids out to a meal, because we value saving money by cooking and eating meals at home.
Anastasia says
I totally agree with you — experiences vs things, and if I’m going to “splurge” on anything for my kids, I’d like it to be their education. My husband seems to feel very differently — he constantly makes comments like “they can get scholarships, or go to a service academy, or take out loans.” Both of us had college funds, I think (I know I did), but ended up having our degrees paid for via military service, so he’s not coming out of left field thinking that one can get a good education without a lot of parental help. But his priorities confuse me, because he has no problem impulse-buying a bunch of *stuff* for the kids that I think is frivolous.
Anyway, to the OP’s question, yes, this is something I think a lot about. I’m enjoying seeing the responses here, and I’m entertained that we all seem pretty like-minded (and a fair number of us differ from our husbands!). I do think “spoiling” can take many forms, though, and I am trying to guard against all the pitfalls. Not buying ALL THE THINGS is part of it, as is making sure kids understand there is a work-money relationship and opportunity cost for everything. Those are the easy ones for me. It’s harder to make sure I maintain an authority figure role, encourage independence, allow failure and the consequences that come with it, and on and on.
ANP says
I find this topic fascinating and will be following this thread with great interest. DH and I couldn’t have been more different in terms of how we were brought up — he has two loving parents of means for whom THINGS = LOVE (love also = love for them, but they are an All of The Things family for sure. My eyeballs almost fell out of my head the first time we spent Christmas with his family). On the other hand, I grew up in an extraordinarily poor single-parent household and have had to work for every dollar I’ve ever had, no financial safety net, etc. We’re now trying to combine our backgrounds into a marriage that has two kids, a dog and a mortgage. I’ve been surprised by how much our respective upbringing has factored into how we see things now — for instance, he recently admitted that he likes to have the power to buy All of The Things for our kids even when he knows he should be paying attention to budget. That was a big step for him!
So anyway, it’s a work in progress for us. My children truly want for nothing (a combination of generous grandparents, tons of other loved ones and relatives and, yes, their parents). My bigger problem is that they get SHOWERED with gifts at holidays and birthdays from others, and I still want to be able to get them something special — but with all those other items it feels as though our gift/s are almost an afterthought. I do agree with others who said that parents should be able to vet/have veto power over gifts, but only to a point — some of the joy is letting Grandma/Uncle/Auntie buy something totally ridiculous (within reason!) for your kid that they never would have been able to do with their own offspring.
I do think I’m more likely to spend money on experiences vs. stuff. I’d rather drop $10 on a visit to the local bounce house place vs. $10 on yet another toy. DH and I are also having conversations re: our own personal expectations WRT paying for their college educations — he wants to be able to cover all of the costs, while I’m fine with the kids taking out a loan for part of it. We’re contributing to their college savings now but would need to do a lot more if we wanted to be certain of covering everything, and I’m just not sure that’s going to be possible with our present incomes.
No brats please says
I love this idea of a family bank with a weekly check-in (first kid is on her way, so I haven’t implemented this in any way, but I love the philosophy behind it!).
http://www.71toes.com/2012/11/a-money-system-that-works.html
Pogo says
These responses are so interesting. Even in planning for baby DH and I are so different – he grew up wealthier than I did. His concept of a “tight budget” is very different from mine.
We’re thinking about how we’ll make an expensive day care work, so I put together a completely reasonable budget (which still included monthly allowances for his golf, Whole Foods truffle oil splurges, etc in addition fixed necessary expenses) that would allow us to put baby in whatever daycare we wanted. His response was that he didn’t want to feel “restricted” at all in his spending. I grew up choosing everything based on how “restricted” my spending was, so this seemed so bratty sounding to me. I don’t want my kiddos to feel the same way – that nothing should interfere with their ability to buy what they want.
AEK says
We’ve dealt with this with my stepson by sacking away any extra money for college tuition. Trips & experiences are in the budget too, but not much “stuff.” You said that you have left over even after savings, but it seems to me that the college fund really can’t be big enough…tuition is skyrocketing, and then there’s room & board, travel expenses for non-local schools, etc.
Of course, some would argue that paying for college is also spoiling—it is certainly a privilege— but it’s something we believe is worthwhile.
BethC says
Great comments- thank you! My oldest is 2.5, so she didn’t really get it yet. But I’m trying to plan ahead.
greenie says
Now that our oldest is 6 we are starting to give her an allowance for chores / helping out etc. It is not very big at all. But she decides what to do with this money and birthday/gift money (besides a portion that is automatically put into college savings). She needs this money to help pay for birthday presents for friends, going to the movies etc. At this point we won’t leave her high and dry if she doesn’t have it, but we want her to see that things cost money and she needs to be responsible for deciding where her money goes. I just recently started browsing doughmain for this. I feel that no matter what income level, children need to learn the value of money and responsibility that comes along with having it.
We also made a conscious decision NOT to move to a different area of town as our income increases. We will be buying a new house in the next year or two but want to stay in our school district which is more diverse ethnically and economically. I want her to see that people come from all walks of life and learn to appreciate what she does have.
hoola hoopa says
+1000 to last paragraph.
Honestly, this is something about which my husband and I disagree. We both grew up in limited income families and had to go without, so the ability to buy something just because our kids (or us) want it is like magic. It’s very appealing to my husband, who will buy them something on every errand. I strongly dislike that behavior and message, so we’ve compromised to (mostly) limiting spending to birthdays and Christmas. We go overboard twice a year, but I figure that’s better than setting the expectation of getting whatever you want, whenever you want.
Items like backpacks and lunchboxes are expected to be used until they are worn out. That expectation is explicit. We don’t replace just because they want a new design, even though we can afford it. We talk about how money plays into it (if we by X, we can’t buy Y or save for Z), but also the importance of not being wasteful is a major part of the discussion.
While admittedly I buy snowboots that may only get used once and more clothing than they really need etc, we do talk about how when we were growing up our “snow boots” were two pairs of socks and a plastic bag or we had two pairs of pants and one pair of shoes to last the entire year. I try to avoid a “we had to walk two miles up hill both ways” tone; My primary hope is that they have empathy for kids who do not have the money for such items. Time will tell if I’m succeeding.
Only my oldest would be old enough for an allowance, but so far I have elected to not do it. She is expected to do chores because she’s a member of the household. IMO, paying for it makes it appear elective and only self-serving. She gets money at birthday/Christmas, tooth fairy, etc, so she still has the experience of saving and spending.
The discussion definitely evolves as the children grow. Before age 3 or so, I’d say there’s not much to do besides not buy everything they ask for to avoid setting up that expectation and habit. Starting ~4, it’s good to be open about things costing money, values around consumerism, participating in selecting toys to keep and toys to give away, prioritizing and delaying purchases, keeping a piggy bank (IME much more concrete than a savings account), etc.
As a side note: I don’t worry about grandparents and other family members (in our case, generally aunts/uncles). I feel like receiving lots of stuff from them is easily separated in a kid’s mind from parental spending. I do strongly discourage notions like “well, I’ll just have Grandma buy it for me, then!” and require expressions of gratitude (verbally or thank you note, depending on circumstance).