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And — here are some of our latest threadjacks of interest – working mom questions asked by the commenters!
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- Has anyone given birth in a teaching hospital?
- My child eats everything, and my friends’ kids do not – how should I handle? In general, what is the best way to handle when your child has some skill/ability and your friend’s child doesn’t have that skill/ability?
- ADHD moms, give me your tips to help with things like behavior in the classroom, attention to detail, etc?
- I think I suffer from mom rage…
- My husband and kids are gone this weekend – how should I enjoy my free time?
- I’m struggling to be compassionate with a SAHM friend who complains she doesn’t have enough hours of childcare.
- If you exclusively formula fed, what tips do you have for in the hospital and coming home?
- Could I take my 4-yo and 8-yo on a 7-8 day trip to Paris, Lyon, and Madrid?
Anonymous says
My sisters and mother live across the country. With first baby on the way we received and said thank you to them for a number of gifts. They weren’t what we asked for, many were not age appropriate, and we would rather have just gotten nothing to some extent. We still need basics so getting dozens of onesies (all made in China, none organic) in very small sizes is kind of annoying.
On top of it all they are using us as a dumping ground and mailing us used stuff, some of which is over 25 years old and in poor condition or stained. Basically any children’s clothing they have (any size up to stuff that could fit an 8 year old) they mail to us. I think the cost of shipping is worth more than the stuff they are sending. Presumably they want us to store this stuff for another 8 years and use it.
Since no one is home we have to go to the post office to pick up these packages and then deal with the package (no pick up recycling where we live).
They recently messaged my husband (who they have met two times) and asked what they could send. They’ve done this before but only ever with me. He suggested toys and pointed out some specific things we were planning to buy ourselves. Rather than buy them they told us they would rather just keep sending us whatever they like. Another package is at the post office for pickup.
I am really fed up. I don’t want this stuff or need it and I don’t want to go pick it up, I’m tired and it’s snowing. We don’t need gifts from anyone, (I refused to have a shower), we can buy our own baby stuff that we actually want. Suggestions?
KJ says
I know it’s annoying to have someone adding chores to your plate, especially when you’re pregnant and exhausted, but you can’t make them stop sending things. I would just donate anything that’s in decent shape to charity, toss the rest, and be thankful for the ability to buy what you want. Not everyone is so lucky.
greenie says
Donate it. If you don’t appreciate it, I’m sure that many others will. I really hope you can find some joy in donating it and giving to others in need who cannot be as selective as you.
mascot says
If they live across the country and have only met your husband twice, I’m guessing you don’t see them very often. So it’s not like they will expect to see baby decked out daily in whatever they are sending. If they have been hanging onto some of this stuff for 25 years, is any of it sentimental? We got a few pieces from my mom that my brother had worn as a baby. Sure, it wasn’t all the cutest, softest stuff. But it was nice to have the pictures of multiple generations in the outfit.
For me, the joy of buying kids clothes wore off pretty soon when I realized how expensive it is and how fast they grow through them. That pair of pants from the consignment sale that was a little bit faded turned out to be just perfect for play clothes that would get destroyed while painting at daycare.
pockets says
Also the joy of buying all your own baby gear wears off as soon as you realize exactly how much baby gear you need and how often you need to buy new stuff. I loved buying the fancy Aden + Anais sleepsacks in size small (which incidentally we basically never used because she was in a swaddle and then it was summer and too hot for a sleepsack) but definitely felt differently when I had to buy the next size up for my six month old, on top of paying for childcare and the zillion other things that babies “need” (new bathtub, pajamas, onesies (even the non-organic China ones add up), booties, winter jacket, stroller blanket). Now that we are approaching 10 months I definitely feel differently about buying the next carseat than I felt about buying the first one.
Anonymous says
Could you thank them profusely, and then let them know how hard it is for you to get to the post office now that you’re so pregnant and have a busy work schedule. Perhaps they would be willing to hold onto any other gifts until they come meet the baby? Stress how excited you are for them to meet the baby and celebrate his or her arrival then.
Meg Murry says
Or at least until you are on maternity leave and will be able to get the deliveries when you are at home? Are you in a small urban apartment? If so, remind them of that, and thank them for the larger sized items but ask that they not send any more because you don’t have anywhere to store them, and you understand if they need to donate them in their area instead. Out of all the things they sent you, there must be at least one thing that you really like or is really your style – if so, praise that one up to the skies, so they get the hint.
If you want specific things, create a registry or Amazon wish list – maybe they will follow it, maybe not, but it at least gives them a clue.
And last – there is a good chance your baby will have blowout diapers that ruin onesies within the first wearing. So don’t stress that they are buying you non-organic cheap onesies – that way if you throw them away after one wearing it isn’t throwing $5-$10 in the trash each time. And then be grateful that you can afford to buy whatever you want, and you have family that wants to spoil you with baby things – I understand you are tired, stressed and ranting, but you sound rather spoiled bratty in your post, so get it out of your system now before you talk to your family again.
JJ says
Co-sign this. Welcome to being a parent – people are going to barge in and you won’t always get your way (having to donate non-organic, cheap onesies being the first–and rather painless–lesson). Yeah, it’s a hassle, but it sounds like your family is excited for you and I would recommend trying to see the good intentions in their gifts.
Spirograph says
me too. I get the frustration, and by all means vent away… but also realize that your family loves you and is trying to show that. Thank them for their good intentions, but be clear that you don’t have space to store this stuff and USPS is inconvenient, so you’d really appreciate if they hold off on the packages for a bit. Is part of the problem that they’re sending things in such a way that the they require delivery confirmation? My packages are always just sitting on my front step when I get home… At the very least, maybe they could write on the box that it’s OK to leave it.
As an aside, this is why you should have a registry and a shower, even if you don’t want one: it consolidates the gifts, and can help direct good intentions. I even coordinatated a “long-distance baby shower” for one friend’s family — they sent everything to me (thank goodness I lived in an apt building that signed for packages), and I schlepped all of it to her actual baby shower. She got to just drive away with everything in her car at once.
MomAnon4This says
Sorry to get all Carolyn Hax here, but to be generous, I think the issue is that they want to feel close to you and clearly are not physical or emotionally close. In a negative light, from your side, it probably seems like they’re trying to control your time and space with unwanted gifts. Clearly you can tell them no – then what would happen? You’d be pushing away family that doesn’t listen and isn’t so (emotionally) close – what would be the fallout? What would you tell your baby when they are old enough to understand about cousins and aunts and grandmas? Is anybody perfect?
I, personally, have asked people to change and it never goes well for me. I’d just take what they sent, donate it or save what you want for later if you have room, and work on the *relationship* aspect. I’d like to see you tell them, “In my friend circle of moms, everyone is buying sweatshop-free separates grown from organic cotton. You’d be surprised how styles of baby clothes have changed in two decades!” – this is asserting yourself without asking them to change.
KJ says
That is really insightful. And it reminds me that my mom (also far away) went a little nuts when I was pregnant. She calmed down a lot when I made an effort to be more communicative – sending her bump photos, telling her about the baby gear we were buying, and reporting back after every midwife appointment even if the report was just “yup, everything’s fine.” She just wanted to feel like she was a part of things.
Anonymous says
I have never at any point in time felt compelled to take a bump photo. :) My mother in law mentioned to me she had a friend who received a bump picture from her DIL every single day. I do not know if that was a suggestion for what she was expecting out of this process.
MIL is providing some assistance with childcare when I go back to work and for that she is a saint and the best person in the entire world and I will never have anything but good things to say about her. Best gift ever.<3
Pogo says
I agree this is annoying, but I think all you can do is ask that they not send you anything more. They will probably still keep sending you things, and as others suggested, you can donate them.
I do understand your frustration though it may have been worded a bit harshly. My grandmother was the same way – she would give me bizarre hand-me-downs or items she picked up at Ocean State Job Lot that were totally not age appropriate or useful. For my wedding she gave me a polyester comforter (not new or in a package, probably from Goodwill). Would I have rather she not have given me these things, and instead given me something I actually needed? Yes, but I knew nothing would change her mind. So I donated everything and tried to be grateful for her gift-giving intent.
Anonyc says
I’ve been there–kids’ hand-me-downs from SILs that were anything from 6 to 20 (!!) years old OR mat clothes that (a) did not fit (as I am 6 inches taller than all my SILs, and have the rump to go with that extra half foot) and (b) were worn out; created more work for me (sorting, schlepping garbage bags of clothes); and for which we had no space in our tiny apartment. Turns out I married into a family of keepers, while I am a merciless tosser, both by temperament and necessity (see, small apartment and no storage). So I hear ya.
My solution was to vent my frustration to my husband (they were his sisters) and my mother, and then to just deal–I sorted through it all, set aside most of it for being too worn out or ugly and then donated, and was able to get a few items that did become regulars in the rotation. I got over my frustration; for a while I realized that they just didn’t have a clue about the space and logistical constraints we were operating under, and now that I’m on the other side (a bit), I realize that these clothes represented the memories of their kids as babies. Once I began to think of it as a donation of happy memories, I was much less irritated and just viewed these bags of clothes as good karma coming our way.
So hang in there. If you’re up for it, communicate with the family that you so appreciate their kind thoughts but they can hold off on the stuff–just blame it on your space limitations, which is a neutral reason. Maybe if you can bear it ask some questions to them about their pregnancies–everyone loves to talk about their own experiences–so they can get it out of their system. (If you can’t muster for the phone call, do it by email.)
Pregnancy and babies and kids are usually very different than the soft focus, twee, thoughtful presentation that seems to permeate the world these days; there’s a place for organic onesies and also a place for ones you toss after a particular horrid blowout in the middle of the night.
mascot says
“Once I began to think of it as a donation of happy memories, I was much less irritated and just viewed these bags of clothes as good karma coming our way.”
That’s a really good way to think of this. Even if it is ultimately purging, taking the extra step to package and ship all of this stuff is harder than dumping it off at the thrift store or the dumpster.
Emily says
I’m not as nice as most of the other posters and would be really straightforward about it. Tell them that you appreciate that they care enough to send packages across the country to you (because, let’s be fair, that’s also a total pain and they wouldn’t do it if they didn’t care) but that you have what you need, at least clothes-wise, and are having trouble finding use for and space to store the items that they keep sending. If you feel the need to justify your feelings, you could say that you’re looking forward to CHOOSING CERTAIN ITEMS for the baby, and that with a houseful of “pre-loved” items, you feel that your right as a new mom to choose things that you really want or need is being stifled by the onslaught of items they keep sending you.
I had to tell my mom something similar. She is something of a compulsive shopper, and she is definitely buying to feed her shopping addiction rather than to help us. She has literally bought all the clothes our daughter could conceivably need from newborn to 18 months. Of course, she bought stuff at boutiques or on sale a few months ago, so none of it can be taken back.
While I DEFINITELY appreciate this from a “yeaaaaaaaaaah, less cost to me!” perspective, she has purchased so much clothing that my husband and I have not gotten to choose a single outfit for our little girl because we can’t justify adding to the huge pile of clothing the baby has already received. Additionally, my mother-in-law and stepmother-in-law (who are, thankfully, not compulsive shoppers) wanted to each buy the baby an outfit or two but are similarly constrained by my mom’s overzealousness. I also do not necessarily share my mom’s taste in baby girl clothing (So. Much. Pink.), but that’s a lesser issue.
The real issue is that I feel like she’s usurping some of our rights as parents….so I told her that. Of course she was shocked and slightly hurt, but she actually took it pretty well. I asked her to ASK US before she bought anything else, since we now need absolutely nothing, and that pretty much ended the buying spree….at least for now.
Anonymous says
the funny thing is we had aunt growing up who viewed us as the “poor” relations and would do this. we would get a box of used stuff that would never fit (her kid was much taller) and books we didn’t want (despite being younger we were more advanced readers than her kid). My Mom would always say something along the lines of “well, now aunt so and so gets to feel good about herself and has a clean bookshelf” before donating everything.
so my mother and sisters understand what it’s like to be on the receiving end of “gifts” like this. and yet they persist.. there is a box every three weeks.
MomAnon4This says
I mean, that’s a reference point, right? “Mom, remember how you felt about the box from Auntie Lovedtodonate? Well… that’s kind of how I feel about these boxes. And now I’m glad Sister has a clean closet, but…”
If I’m writing the script, Mom says: “oh, yeah, NOW I get it. I’ll let your sister know”.
But I’m just telling you – they never, ever read the script. Ever. Good luck.
CHJ says
Late to reply, but I just wanted to say that I completely sympathize with the post office aspect of this whole thing. For a while, DH and I lived in an apartment where USPS would never leave packages. DH’s relatives would send us things all the time, including lovely things like birthday gifts, but it was a huge burden to the post office during the short window when it was open on Saturdays, immediately, or else USPS would return the shipment to the sender. We had several packages sent back to relatives before we picked them up because we couldn’t get to the post office in time, and we got in huge trouble and created a big family drama from it. It was such a burden that we came to hate those little orange slips on our door and wished people would stop sending us things, even if that made us ungrateful little jerks (like my MIL said we were!).
TL;DR. Going to the post office is a huge, annoying chore that no one should have to suffer, least of all pregnant working women.
Anonymous says
THANK YOU. I want to cry when I see the slips.
Anon says
“All made in China, none organic.”
Fin.
pockets says
yep.
AEK says
Oh, take it easy. My standards might change as I deal with babyhood and all the stress and just trying to stay afloat— I know they will— but I can sympathize with the OP wanting to have certain things. And if they’ve registered for or requested particular types of things, and her family ignores it, that’s not helpful. My MIL sends me all these logo onesies that I really don’t like — “I’m a Hunk” and “Mommy’s Handsome Man.” Even appreciating that she’s thinking of us, I still feel annoyed to have to find a place for them, while in the meantime, I have zero burp cloths. I think the OP is justifiably annoyed that she’s being inconvenienced with the packages; if people are inclined to send gifts, why not use the extra 1% of effort it takes to try to meet the recipient’s needs / wants?
Anon says
I’m Asian. I find the idea that my child will be wearing sweatshop made junk stitched together by his very distanct cousins disgusting. I can afford to buy clothing made in good working conditions and feel I should. I feel this is something I should teach my child. As for organic, why not? Where is the harm? I spent 8 months carrying this person around and eating well, why should I stop caring about his well being? If I will pay for it and it hurts no one why should you care?
AEK says
Um, I just said I don’t think there’s anything wrong with OP having her own standards & preferences for what she wants.
KLM says
Somehow you manage to judge other people’s purchasing choices while demanding that no one judge yours. Impressive.
pockets says
There is no harm in buying organic and I certainly don’t care if you do, but the problem with your comment and OP’s comment is that it pretty clearly implies (or in your case, explicitly states) that buying organic, locally-made items is the morally superior choice.
Also, a lot of the comments reek of, Ugh, how dare people buy me what they want and not what I tell them to buy me! I know it’s annoying to handle unwanted gifts (I myself have a MIL that doesn’t understand the concept that girls are still girls even if they aren’t dressed in head-to-toe pink), but if a bride-to-be made the same comment about guests buying off-registry, what would you think?
Anonymous says
Actually thanks for that. I didn’t think of it in that way. We made a point of not having a shower and saying please no gifts (barely got the wedding thank yous done in a reasonable time and didnt want more obligations) XD I agree that I should be gracious about gifts. It’s nice people are thinking of us.
I know I seem like an evil person who hates gifts but I am so tired. I don’t even get off work early enough to go to the post office today. It’s cold outside and I don’t want this box of unknown size. I don’t want to carry it up multiple flights of stairs. I have nowhere to store clothing up till 9 years old. I don’t want to find space for it. I want to go home and sleep.
Meg Murry says
Since your family is obviously ignoring the “no gifts” request, I would highly highly recommend that you make a registry before Christmas – because if they aren’t listening now, they definitely won’t be able to stop themselves before Christmas.
And have you told them that when they ship packages to you via USPS you have to go pick them up at the post office during limit hours? They probably think they are doing you this great favor shipping you all this stuff. I’d phrase it in a neutral way, like “I’m concerned if we don’t get the slip from the post office saying we have a package it might get shipped back to you, and what a waste of your time that would be – why don’t you hold off on shipping us any more hand-me-downs right now?” I’m sure the shipper thinks that it is just arriving at your doorstep, and not trying to make more work with you having to go pick it up at the post office.
And yes, go home and sleep – being well rested will help.
NewMomAnon says
Ooo, our favorite burp cloths were the Gerber cloth diapers – the prefolds are small but soft and absorbent, and the big floursack ones are perfect for covering your shoulder if you have a kiddo who burps up a lot. They sell them at Target. Buy a lot of them – like, dozens and dozens. We had to buy a ton of extra once we discovered that the cute printed/organic official “Burp Cloths” weren’t up to the challenge of our spitty infant.
Extra bonus: I hear they make great rags for painting, dusting, etc once the kiddo is out of the burping stage.
Spirograph says
Yup, this is what we used, too. Cloth diapers as burp cloths was perhaps the single most useful bit of parenting advice I ever got…
NewMomAnon says
Yes, my father in law was a big proponent of the cloth diapers and even gave us a pack. My single most useful piece of advice was “fluff the ruffles.” We had so many diaper leaks until we figured that one out…
Anonyc says
+1000. Loved the Gerber cloth diapers for my extra-spitty kids. And they are great rags later on.
Maddie Ross says
Completely co-sign. I bought nicer ones from Aden & Anais, but never used them. The gerber ones were fabulous, easily laundered and cheap enough that I didn’t mind throwing away if they got super gross.
PS – I also bought a pack of the organic gerber diapers. I did not like them as much! YMMV, but the regular cotton were bigger and seemed to work better.
Anonymous says
It’s funny because we’ve asked for things like bibs. And no one will send us bibs. We didn’t ask for anything that would cost more than $10. When my parents asked what they could do to help I asked my parents to look out for a used stroller for me that I liked the model of (they live in a much bigger city and I made it clear I would pay for the stroller and shipping) and they outright refused (too much work) so I bought the thing myself and had it shipped to where I live. What we really need is time. Like… If I could have a person for a day drive around and pick up my baby stuff like the car seat that we had to special order (I live in the middle of nowhere so everything is order in), pick up dry cleaning and buy some frozen meals to throw in the freezer that would be an epic gift.
AEK says
Yeah, I am definitely learning that people love to buy cute stuff like clothes and stuffed animals, whether requested or not, while the practical gifts just languish on the registry. And, come to think of it, I’m sure I did the same thing to my friends, just assuming the basics would be covered and getting cute (to me!) things instead.
This discussion has also been a good reminder that I am an adult with an income who chose to have a baby, and it’s our responsibility to provide what we want / need, and not rely on gift-givers to subsidize our life choices. (But that does not mean that I won’t be annoyed with another “Daddy’s Lil’ Quarterback!” onesie from my MIL…)
Anonymous says
You really don’t need much to have a baby. Like really not much at all. :) for people like us with two incomes there is no way we couldn’t cover the stuff aspect, even if everything was bought brand new and even if we went for the most expensive stuff possible.
I wish I had more energy and time and I wish I could do more healthy things (commit to pregnancy fitness class and swimming more than once or twice a week). Close to due date so I try to read to baby and play music twice a day.
A lot of stuff I find really hard and daunting (going downstairs with a laundry basket), bending for the dishwasher and getting the energy and will power to get out of bed is getting hard.
I guess for everyone it’s different but I could use a break basically, not stuff. Have gotten a maid to help with it all. Am kind of ashamed we need the maid.
ml says
I forbid you to feel ashamed about the maid. There are not enough hours in the day to be a working mom, keep up with housework, and sleep. You can’t outsource the rest of it, so pay for all the help you can afford with housework and don’t look back. It’s the closest you can get to buying time and energy.
mascot says
“Have gotten a maid to help with it all. Am kind of ashamed we need the maid.”
This is not a guilt trip that you need to put on yourself. You are giving yourself the gift of time and possibly a better job than you would have done. In my mind, it’s not different than so many other conveniences. Restaurant vs cooking, grocery store vs. backyard veggie patch, manicures/blowouts vs. DIY. Besides, by using my cleaning service, I am supporting a small, local business. There is no need to apologize for this choice, IMO
POSITA says
Thanks for all the comments on the mittens! We’re going to try some stores in person and, if that fails, try ordering from Amazon.
Pogo says
I have this cardigan and it is AMAZING. It is like a fancy sweatshirt, basically.
Chi Squared says
Yes, I have 2 and just ordered another one. I wear the black one to the office all the time – the color covers up the more casual material.
hoola hoopa says
I own two :) Love them and get frequent compliments.
Meg Murry says
I love the collapse/expand option! Yay! Keep it!
mascot says
Yep, this is great. Much easier to scroll past discussions that I’m not interested in following or that don’t have new messages.
ml says
me too!
(former) preg 3L says
I also love that Kat tests out new features on this page before putting them on the main one. Keep the collapse/expand option!
hoola hoopa says
me, three! I’m not losing new threads while scanning past threads that don’t interest me!
Maternity Leave says
I am starting to prepare for maternity leave. I am an in-house attorney and I do not see most of my clients in person. To date, if it hasn’t come up naturally in conversation, I have not mentioned that I am expecting. I was wondering what others have done in preparation for maternity leave. We have talked a lot about transition work, but I am wondering about the communication to clients. Did you communicate to your clients that you were expecting and would be out? Did you provide them guidance on who to contact in your absence? What did you do to prepare your clients before leave?
FVNC says
I am also in-house and do not see my clients in person. I think you do need to notify clients in advance, even if you plan on responding to emails while you’re on leave. About a month before my due date, I began adding a short blurb to emails with the approximate date of my leave and who the client should contact in my absence (“Just wanted to let you know that beginning in October, I will be on maternity leave. Person X, copied here, is familiar with [Project] and will be able to assist you with any issues that arise while I’m away.”). I also invited my backup to meetings and cc’ed them on emails so that backup and client could “meet” each other. And, just because my leave began at the tail end of an acquisition, I gave my cell phone number to a select few clients. I did receive and answer a number of calls and emails during the first week of my leave (although there really wasn’t any expectation for me to do so) but after that people generally left me alone and were happy to work with the designated back-up.
Anon says
I’m also an attorney prepping for maternity leave but not in house. I generally interact with each client at least once/ month (some much more, of course). at about 30 weeks, I looped each client in on transition plan during our otherwise scheduled meeting/ call. I cc’ed the colleague who will be the contact while I’m away. So far, been pretty seamless with lots of good wishes and enough time to answer transition questions.
Lyssa says
For me, I worked at a small firm and had some long-distance clients. If it came up (i.e., if we were discussing plans that would play out around the time), I would mention it, but I actually did not find that to be a major issue (it was fairly easy to plan around it). Otherwise, I sent each client a letter about a month beforehand saying something like: “I will be out of the office on medical leave from mid-December until approximately the end of February. I have ensured that nothing is scheduled for that time period, but if anything comes up, please contact X. I will have periodic contact with the office and will periodically check email during this time, but will not be available to answer immediate questions.” (The exact wording was much more elegant, but that was the gist.)
That said, my leave was fairly limited (8 weeks) and I was not particularly busy at the time, so it really was not a big problem at all. I got a few FYI emails, but no fires to put out or anything like that, and everyone was very understanding. It might be different if you want to take more time off or have a higher pressure job.
Lyssa says
Oh, I also wrote up a word document with a brief summary of each case and what the next issue was on it, so that anyone who faced any questions or emergencies would have an easy reference.
Pogo says
Don’t expect anyone else to tell them – I feel like it’s come up here and on the main site, that you can “just tell the office gossip and they’ll let everyone know!”. Maybe this does work for happy news like pregnancy, but I had a family emergency earlier this year (which I took leave for) and while people in the immediate office seemed to know, remote clients/colleagues never got the memo.
It bothered me because they assumed I was on vacation when I was dealing with a terrible tragedy; if you are also worried about clients/colleagues assuming you are on the beach when you’re recovering from birth, I would flat out mention it (or grow thicker skin than I have!).
Anon S says
Hi ladies, does anyone have a recommendation for a great maternity coat? I live in Chicago so will definitely be needing a warm coat this winter. Thanks in advance!
(former) preg 3L says
Short answer: no. Real answer: I had my daughter in February and I live in NYC so thought I’d mention where I got my maternity winter coat — Old Navy! It was nothing terribly beautiful, but it was super warm, had deep, fleece-lined pockets, a belt so I didn’t look like I was wearing a trash bag, and managed to cover my bump up to the night before she was born. This looks like this year’s variety of the coat I had: http://oldnavy.gap.com/browse/product.do?pid=105393012&vid=1&locale=en_US&kwid=1&sem=false&sdReferer=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.oldnavy.com%2Fproducts%2Fmaternity-winter-coat.jsp
Anon S says
I saw that Old Navy one earlier, but they only have in XL, ugh! I will have to stalk the page in hopes that they get new sizes.
ECR says
I am also in Chicago, and I was pregnant during the Polar Vortex. I’d planned to get by in my regular coat (or husband’s coat), but quickly ditched that plan.
I like this post on winter coats: http://pregnantfashionista.com/stay-warm-dry-and-trendy-in-bellybuttons-winter-coats/ I got the Phyllis Parka last year and have no regrets. It was warm and it made a large bump look as fashionable as possible under the circumstances :) This year I plan to wear the coat with the extension piece removed. Bellydance Maternity often carries Bellybutton winter coats; I’d give the store a call and ask if they plan to this year.
Anon S says
Thank you for the rec!!
Anonymous says
I did well with a maternity puffer vest and a non-maternity double-breasted, belted trench coat. The double breasted front left enough room for even 9 month belly. I was cozy on most winter days with a hat and scarf, but I layered a wool sweater on the really cold days.
Watermelon says
The quality is a little disappointing for the price, but the MamaCoat at Nordstrom is pretty clever. It has panels to make it expand for pregnancy and then even more for wearing over an Ergo. The panels can be zipped out to make it a non-pregnancy and baby-wearing coat.
(former) preg 3L says
I know the main corpore!!e page readers roll their eyes when we talk about Lands End as “fashion” but I just ordered 2 pairs of adorable flats from Lands End. I am SO excited about them (and I got 25% off plus free shipping). Thought I’d mention them here for pregnant ladies who are past high heels! Link to follow.
(former) preg 3L says
I ordered these in black
http://www.landsend.com/products/womens-vivian-tassel-flats/id_273229?sku_0=::SPB
and these
http://www.landsend.com/products/womens-vivian-venetian-flat-shoes/id_245150?sku_0=::F1X
(former) preg 3L says
Link is in moderation. They’re the Vivian Tassel Flats (in black) and the Vivian Venetian Flats in silver.
ELL says
I just returned this cardigan. Loved the feel of it, but it was too short for my 5’10” frame and way too tight through the shoulders (not usually a problem for me since I’m wearing larges while I breastfeed. But if it fit, it would be a very useful piece.