This post contains affiliate links and CorporetteMoms may earn commissions for purchases made through links in this post. For more details see here. Thank you so much for your support!
We are a participant in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program, an affiliate advertising program designed to provide a means for us to earn fees by linking to Amazon.com and affiliated sites.
Sales of Note…
(See all of the latest workwear sales at Corporette!)
- Ann Taylor – Up to 40% off full-price pants and shirts; extra 30% off all sale styles
- Banana Republic Factory – 40% off everything; extra 15% off purchase
- Eloquii – $19 and up select spring styles; 40% off everything else
- J.Crew -25% off your purchase; up to 50% off special-occasion styles
- J.Crew Factory – Up to 50% off everything; extra 15% off 3 styles; extra 20% off 4 styles; extra 50% off clearance
- Lands’ End – 30% off full-price styles
- Talbots – 25% off regular-price dresses, skirts, accessories & shoes
- Zappos – 23,000+ sale items (for women)! Check out these reader-favorite workwear brands on sale, and some of our favorite kid shoe brands on sale.
- J.Crew – 25% off your purchase; up to 50% off special-occasion styles
- Lands’ End – 30% off full-price styles
- Hanna Andersson – Up to 30% off Easter and spring to summer styles
- Carter’s – Extra 20% off spring sets = up to 60% off
- buybuyBaby – Spring sale: Up to 40% off
See some of our latest articles on CorporetteMoms:
Click here to see our top posts!
And — here are some of our latest threadjacks of interest – working mom questions asked by the commenters!
- If you’re a working parent of an infant with low sleep needs, how do you function at work when you’re in the throes of baby’s sleep regression?
- Should I cut my childcare down to 12 hours a month if I work from home?
- Will my baby have speech delays if we raise her bilingual?
- Has anyone given birth in a teaching hospital?
- My child eats everything, and my friends’ kids do not – how should I handle? In general, what is the best way to handle when your child has some skill/ability and your friend’s child doesn’t have that skill/ability?
- ADHD moms, give me your tips to help with things like behavior in the classroom, attention to detail, etc?
- I think I suffer from mom rage…
- My husband and kids are gone this weekend – how should I enjoy my free time?
- I’m struggling to be compassionate with a SAHM friend who complains she doesn’t have enough hours of childcare.
- If you exclusively formula fed, what tips do you have for in the hospital and coming home?
- Could I take my 4-yo and 8-yo on a 7-8 day trip to Paris, Lyon, and Madrid?
I love the color but the shape looks really dated to me – I’d expect to see it in my mother’s closet.
I’m probably old enough to be your mother. I just ordered it for a casual non-court day. We’ll see what it looks like on.
Yeah, I love this. I don’t think the shape is dated – it probably depends on your height. On me (6’0″), this is a great shape.
Pumping Question says
How do you keep building a freezer supply after you go back to work? Currently I either pump when/if the baby gets up around 3 am, or pump after the first two morning feedings. I am hoping the 3 am wake up will phase out soon, and the second feeding will be a full pumping session when I am working.
For the first month or so, I was pumping more than baby was eating during day, so I banked the extra 2 or so oz every day. That eventually stopped and things were level for a while, then I started burning through freezer stash.
Why do you feel like you need to keep building it? For me, once I went back to work, nothing was worth adding in extra pumping sessions. If you do though, I think the most common is to pump before you go to bed.
Pigpen's Mama says
I had grand intentions of having a great freezer stash, but the hassle wasn’t worth it. Especially since I had lipase issues and had to scald the milk before freezing it. But I did have a small stash from extra milk for the first few months.
After ~ 2 months back at work (baby was 6 months) my pumping was a lot less productive, thanks to stress, schedules, and the return of my period. At that point I started supplementing with formula and officially dropped a pumping session.
Pumping Question says
I want a couple freezer bags at daycare just in case and state law requires they only be 3 months old. So I won’t need a ton, but will need some in a few months.
Meg Murry says
Plan to pull the freezer bags for use on Mondays and then freeze what you pump on Fridays, that way you rotate through the freezer stash.
Or if daycare will only use frozen in an emergency, take home a couple frozen bags once a week yourself to defrost and take the next day.
I also pumped every single morning after the first feed, including weekends from when I went back to work until 6-8 months old or so when I switched to combo feeding instead of freezer stash.
Pumping Question says
Ohhh good call on the rotating. I didn’t even think of that. I would have to freeze Friday’s anyway because that same state law requires any fresh milk be used within 48 hours. The daycare doesn’t have any restrictions on when they will use frozen milk so this will be a good option.
or just have incorrect dates written on the bags. it’s your baby! my milk was completely fine after 10 months in a chest freezer.
After going back, I’d pump after the first morning feed on the weekends and last thing before bed. I’d probably drop the 3am pumping session now and just go back to sleep after your 3am feed.
No name says
Does baby use one side or two?I was able to get a few ounces out of the un-drunk-from side every morning, and then also I would sneak in a pumping session on Saturday and Sunday (and bank some of Friday’s pumped milk).
Before I went back to work, I pumped once during baby’s long morning nap and once around 10/11 after baby went to bed but before she woke up for her night feeding. I haven’t touched any of it since I went back to work though so I haven’t really added to it except for when I have an occasional extra that I need to freeze because it will go bad before she can drink it. If I was going to do it, I’d pump around ten after she’s gone to bed but before she will wake up again to eat. I do this some days if I want to have a little extra for whatever reason and it’s fairly easy.
This may depend on your output and your kid, but for me at least I don’t feel like it’s necessary to build up too much of a stash. I have a few days worth for peace of mind, but it’s just sitting there unused and she eats the next day whatever I bring home that day. And a lot of women I know that built up big stashes ended up either donating them or throwing them away, so I don’t think it’s necessarily that productive to worry about it.
Yeah, I had a giant stash and have ended up donating a ton and will probably donate more in the future. I was a nicu mom who they had pump 8-10x/day initially and ended up with just a lot of extra milk.
Right now, it’s my security blanket. I have several weeks’ worth of milk in a chest freezer. I alternate giving the kid fresh and frozen and freeze the newest milk to make sure I don’t let any of mine expire.
The Three Pot System says
This started as a rant about how I’m feeling like we’re being stretched thin financially, but my husband is relatively clueless about that and I think I realized the problem is that we have a three pot system (mine, his, and joint) that worked well before we had a kid/more expenses, but now isn’t working so well.
Those of you with a three pot system – how do you keep track of finances?
Did anyone go from having separate accounts to merging them entirely?
Those of you with stepkids — how did you address those expenses?
This is with the caveat that I know we’re in the top 5% nationally and ridiculously wealthy in the grand world view scheme of things.
We went from having a three-pot system early in our marriage to merging entirely when we bought a house and I was pregnant with baby #1. I honestly don’t see how we would do it practically to have separate + joint accounts at this point; the overwhelming majority of our expenses are shared or kid-related.
I am a very, very independent person, but surprisingly it hasn’t bothered me to merge finances (I maintain, but haven’t contributed to, a pre-marriage investment account that my husband can’t touch, and we obviously have separate IRAs and 401ks, but we match our contributions these days. Our incomes are roughly equal). If you really feel like you need separate accounts as a contingency plan, maybe consider keeping some kind of token amount separate — like $10k or so, and then just merge the rest.
No experience with step-kids, but I would guess that you really have to accept them as your kids and joint expenses. Trying to parse that out seems like a needlessly fraught exercise, unless your husband makes a huge amount more than you, and has huge child support obligations.
I had a ‘merged’ account with husband #1 and he wiped us out financially (alcoholism) when he was in charge of our finances. So, it was really important to me to keep my own account when I got married to my wonderful current husband – and to have full access and most bill-paying responsibility to our ‘joint’ account from which all house / kid expenses are now paid.
Before we had a kid we didn’t monitor joint account much – we each put in about 70% of our take home pay, and there was always plenty to take care of the bills.
Now, we retain the 3 pot system but the amounts we keep in our individual accounts is lower – we each keep around 10% for ourselves, and the rest goes to joint. I pay all of my law school loans from “my” account (and yes, I realize that all income now is legally a joint asset, it just somehow feels better to pay my loans with “my” money.)
I’m a child of divorce, and my parents set up a joint account that was to be used for my brother and I. My dad paid his child support into it, and my SAHM used it to contribute towards rent, food, school expenses, etc. I’m sure that my stepdad’s income (especially since my mom didn’t work) was also largely spent on things related to us, or to expenses he would not otherwise have had to incur (larger house, minivan, etc.)
The Three Pot System says
I think this may be the way we need to go — putting the bulk of our paychecks in our joint account and keeping a small percentage for our own ‘mad money’.
Right now I pay daycare out of my account because my take-home pay is (was?) higher because I made more, he had CS payments taken directly out of his paycheck, and is able to put more $$ into his 401K because he’s eligible for catch-up contributions (we both max out). CS is going to end soon, but college costs will probably come pretty close to CS payments AND I’ve reduced my schedule at work, so our take-home will soon have much less of a gap.
I’ve got no problem absorbing the day-to-day costs due to having a ‘blending family’ — it’s the uncertainty/lack of control I have over some of those expenses — e.g., we don’t know how much college is going to cost and H hasn’t said outright to ANYONE (me, stepkid, ex) how much he can afford. While he doesn’t expect my income to play a role in tuition payments, it indirectly affects me since it means I’m footing more of daycare costs (I realize that’s the deal I signed up for, though).
Probably the most surprising thing about marriage to me so far is how hard it is for us to talk about money without both of us getting defensive!
Meg Murry says
We split our accounts into:
-bill paying account (fixed expenses – daycare, mortgage, car payments, student loans, internet, piano lessons – anything where the monthly amount doesn’t change ). The bills are all auto deducted from this account, and anything that can’t be autodeducted like daycare is set up to automatically mail a check. Basically, this account is “set it and forget it” – I just check once a month to make sure everything went in and out like it was supposed to, and every 3-6 months or so to make sure we don’t need to adjust our automatic deposits into this account.
-day to day account (groceries, fluctuating utilities, etc) – we each have a debit card for this account
-short term savings (vacations, need new appliances or car repairs, etc)
-long term and true emergency savings
-a separate account related to our rental properties
We then also each have a credit card that is automatically paid in full each month, with the understanding that we have to discuss it if we go over a certain $ amount (usually $500 a month max, $1000 a month around holidays)
HOWEVER, I am not in a blended family situation. How old is your stepson/how close to college? I am not an expert, but I know one of my friends was given the advice to switch to “married filing separately” in order to avoid having the step-parent’s income taken into account for financial aid decisions (but I have no idea if this was actually good advice or if it doesn’t actually matter at all).
Our 3 pot system transitioned from mostly having money in our own pots with a set amount in a joint account for combined expenses (wedding, rent) to everything going into joint account and each of us just keeping a small amount in our individual accounts for personal items, gifts, or in case of emergency. We leave a pretty big cushion in the joint checking for unexpected expenses, and we each check online periodically just to keep tabs, and check with the other on unusually large expenses (not really for permission, just kind of FYI, I ordered this thing for house/kids/self).
I’m completely with you on the clueless husband. We borrowed a ton of money from my parents to buy a house so we could finally feel comfortable reproducing but saving to repay has been a drag. When he sees “extra” money in his account – no matter how many times we’ve talked about the budget and how much of his paycheck needs to go towards debt repayment – he wants to spend it on “toys” and it turns into a huge fight where I am inevitably the Jewish Accountant a-hole wife. Well, I now have a solution. When I was going on mostly unpaid maternity leave, I insisted on control of all of our accounts including his so that I can make sure ends are meeting while I have no paycheck (he is also clueless on our bills and would treat it as a chore to monitor our CC spending). I started to transfer enough money out of his account to cover our bills and leaving mine alone. I continued to do so while receiving disability and still doing so now after going back to work. Now, I t never looks like there is “extra” in his account. All debt repayment comes from my paycheck. Instead of being in the hole from unpaid maternity leave, we saved 10K. I plan to continue with this even if it means blatantly lying about my income (I’m getting a large bonus I’m planning to put into debt repayment pile and forget to mention). This is literally the only thing that’s worked for me in the ten years we’ve been together, not for lack of trying. I am elated that I’ve found this solution. As an aside, his “toys” are often sitting in the closets, unused. I don’t feel like I’m stifling something essential by putting a cap on superfluous spending. However, I do spend a lot more time researching interesting trips (in advance, not last minute inspiration like he likes to do), classes, family gatherings, etc and putting our normal expenses on subscription so I can anticipate spending and plan in advance.
Pigpen's Mama says
A very belated thanks to the suggestions for trikes etc. last week. We ended up getting a small regular trike that she can ALMOST use and this odd four wheeled ride-on/walker (Y Pewi, $20 for the floor model, so why not). Kiddo is digging them both so far.
The push trikes looked like fun, but were bigger than I expected and we didn’t have anywhere to put it that would make it easier to use than the stroller.
Midwest Mama says
My daughter has her first loose tooth. Does anyone have any fun tooth fairy traditions to share with me? I honestly can’t remember what my parents did when I was little. I think I might have had a special pillow to put the tooth in. Do those still exist?
My kid is only 6 months, but someone gave us a special pillow (an owl, because I’m an owl person), so they’re definitely still out there. Now I just have to find a place for the pillow for the next 5-6 years.
Mrs. Jones says
I also have the owl tooth pillow for our son who hasn’t lost any teeth yet!
–A fellow owl person
I had a tooth box. It was wood with a sliding lid and shaped like a tooth. I’d put it under my pillow with the tooth in it, the tooth would disappear and a quarter or two would be in its place in the morning. With inflation, not sure what the going rate for a tooth is these days… :)
Also on tooth-watch. We got a stash of gold dollar coins from the bank. I figure they look like pirate treasure and it saves me from having to do some pintrest glitter dollar bill project.
The tooth fairy started out bringing my daughter gold dollar coins. I thought they were cool and special, but my daughter was unimpressed and informed me that the tooth fairy brought all her friends $5 per tooth. Sigh.
Meg Murry says
My husband got a roll of gold dollar coins that he keeps in his underwear drawer that are our tooth fairy currency. It works well for us because:
-the gold coins are kind of special and shiny
-it’s not too much money (don’t start at $5 or $10 like some parents have)
-it means we don’t have to scramble when we have no cash or wind up digging in the couch for quarters
-we aren’t likely to spend the gold coins otherwise
We also helped my son write the tooth fairy a note with the first tooth asking if he could keep the tooth, and now we generally encourage him to put the tooth in a ziploc under his pillow so we can find it.
The tooth fairy has also written apology notes when she forgot a couple nights.
I’d suggest not starting anything too elaborate or Pinterest-y (glitter on the floor, etc) because that kind of thing is hard to keep up with.
Maddie Ross says
No loose teeth yet here, but back in the day my parents did two-dollar bills for lost teeth. Like a gold dollar, it was a special, unique way thing to get, but not a big investment for mom and dad. They also just got a stack at the bank and held them for this purpose only.
Funny Tooth Story says
We had a little pillow growing up, I think, with a tooth pocket.
But, funny story: my mom was cleaning out a box of old papers and found an enraged letter from my little sister, berating the tooth fairy and demanding her tooth back because she had left her autograph book under her pillow for the tooth fairy to sign, and the tooth fairy had not noticed that.
I now have my son’s teeth in my jewelry box in my closet and I feel like a witch. That is all.
Midwest Mama says
Ha! I hadn’t thought about what the “tooth fairy” actually does with the teeth she collects.
She waves her magic wand and transforms them into gold coins so she doesn’t have to keep them!
But when I was a kid, I believed that her castle was built out of all the teeth. Ick.
Ha! My parents downsized recently, and while going through their file cabinet, they found a plastic bag containing a lock of my hair from my first haircut and a tooth. It was gross and creepy. Don’t save your kids’ teeth – nobody, including you, wants to look at that 25+ years later.
Back with another stroller question. It turns out that some double strollers can be used (with a pretty simple infant insert) from birth–no bassinet or carseat needed. (Recap: I’m looking for a stroller to accommodate a newborn and a 2-year-old.) One such stroller is the Maclaren Twin Techno. (I think the City Mini GT Double can do the same. Not sure if there are others.)
I found a Twin Techno on Craigslist. It looks good in the pictures. Two questions:
1. Does anyone know if the Maclaren Twin Techno works for tall adults? (5’10” and 6’6″)
2. Do Maclaren strollers generally hold up well? Or should I go for a new one over a used one?
Thanks in advance!
I read your first question as asking whether two tall adults could ride in the stroller. Still giggling over that thought.
PS – if anyone knows of a stroller I could ride in, my daughter would love to push me. Yes, I would wear a helmet.
Depending on your size.. I’ve sat in the city mini and my quinny buzz on a number of occasions and while they may not be rated for my weight I haven’t broken them.
I have a Maclaren twin umbrella (not sure if it’s the Techno) and the handles don’t telescope up and down. I think it would be really uncomfortable for a person who is 6’6″, although I guess it also depends on how long the 6’6″ person’s arms and legs are.
I actually have both and they are both great for different reasons.
Both work well for tall adults. The CityMini has telescoping handles- not sure about the McLaren although we have an older model. Both have the adaptor for an infant carseat. We had a Chicco but I found it easier to just get the Chicco caddy.
Maclaren Techno- good bc it reclines all the down for naps in the stroller, best umbrella stroller around, durable (except for the foam handles. so annoying they haven’t fixed this yet). We use this primarily for travelling as it is significantly smaller than our CityMini double. Get used if you can. Most people keep this around as a secondary stroller so used ones will still be in good shape.
BabyJogger double- quality product, excellent handling, each seat also full reclines. We use this as our primary stroller for long walks and in town events. A big downside is that it is huge.
Feeling queasy says
Gross question. I’m 6 weeks pregnant and the nausea hit hard this week (after two miscarriages in which the lack of nausea was a clue that something was not right, I’m oddly thrilled to be feeling awful). How did you deal with pregnancy nausea/vomiting at work? I haven’t thrown up yet, but I’ve come close, and I’m not sure what the ideal locale will be if I have enough advance warning. We have only multi-stall bathrooms (three stalls for the floor) and I’d say that about 50% of the time there’s someone else in the bathroom. Nobody knows I’m pregnant yet and even if they did, I would feel beyond weird if someone happened to come into the bathroom while I was using it. I do have my own office with a door that closes, but I’ve never not thrown up in a toilet without immediate access to someplace to rinse my mouth, clean my face, etc (in non-pregnant situations, I puke about once every two years). What did you do, besides work from home? Do I just need to put on my big girl pants and use a bag in my office?
Congratulations, and best of luck!
Use a bag in your office, and I also recommend the following:
– Invest in some gallon ziplocks for the deed, and double bag them for extra insurance
– Invest in or start bringing a cheap opaque canvas or cloth bag (e.g. the ones they hand out for free at CLEs) and use it to move your secret puke stash to an outside garbage can at the end of the day.
– Keep mouthwash and wet wipes at your desk.
– Conference calls on mute, always.
Congrats! All best wishes sent your way.
This might not be what you want to hear, but I had a really hard first 5 months, starting at 5 weeks, and I ended up telling my officemates very, very early. Much earlier than I wanted to. Earlier than our parents. But I had a panic attack – my very first one – one day on the way home from work, and it was because I was so incredibly stressed about hiding this from my coworkers. So, obviously you do you, but I found telling my officemates (small group, satellite location from the main office) to be a significant life improvement so that I could leave early/come in later, or close my door, lay on the floor, gag, or throw up in the trashcan if necessary without feeling like I needed to make a ton of excuses. I actually never ended up throwing up – go figure – but I felt so close so much of the time that being able to close my office door to conceal my gagging was really a necessity.
I did too. And I worked on a floor with a single bathroom – which was frequently occupied. So I ended up using random trashcans (open office…I didn’t have an office…it was awful…). I learned to always keep a plastic liner in my trashcan….
I’m dealing with pregnancy nausea for the second time, so I feel like a little bit of an expert. I rarely threw up during pregnancy #1, and haven’t yet this time.
Counter-intuitive as it seems, eating helped me most. Plain, boring things (crackers, white rolls, pretzels) tend to work best for me when I’m feeling worst. I eat them slowly, but consistently, throughout the day. I try to avoid big meals and just snack through out the day.
Also, no one really knows what’s in an opague mug–I would sip on gatorade during long meetings. Slightly sour candy also helped, so I keep a roll of Jolly Ranchers in my bag.
Congratulations! I second eating small amounts so that your stomach never empties, even though it seems counterintuitive. Eat plain boring things or whatever sounds remotely appetizing in that moment (I think I existed on lemonade and salt and vinegar chips for a month or so with my first).
I also realized that I rarely actually threw up but constantly felt like I needed a strategy for when/if it became real. I also kept bags on me, even at my desk, with my door not closed but slightly ajar so that I could quickly close it if needed. I found that the nausea was worse if I became hot, so I would layer to be able to cool myself quickly if need be.
Trash can in my office when I couldn’t make it to the 2-stall bathroom. For me it was more dry-heaving than actual vomiting, but still nice to have a private place. I did have to skip one major meeting because I was throwing up nonstop and it was somewhere where you have to be escorted in the hallways/to the bathroom — so I ended up disclosing a little earlier than 12 weeks. Also, eating every 45 minutes helped a LOT.
Vomitty McVomitface says
I agree – keep bags, and also I liked keeping those cleansing face wipes in my office (Burt’s Bees always smelled good to me, which helped), gum, toothbrush, and baby wipes. I also started carrying my make-up in my purse (helpful after kids since I do my make up in the car every single day now). It always made me feel better to freshen up before opening the door. I also puked in a planter outside my office, so you kind of just got to do what you got to do.
Vomitty McVomitface says
You also could get some of those deodorizing doggie waste or diaper disposal bags if you worried about any residual smell.
Feeling queasy says
Thanks everyone! And the suggestion to eat frequently is a good one. I tried it today and it helped. Also, Vomitty–that link is hilarious.
Anyone have suggestions on getting an eight week old to sleep in a crib instead of the Rock and play? He is going on day three of no naps. He has to sleep in a crib at daycare in a few weeks so I’d rather make the transition now. He literally screams on and off for 90 minutes until I give up and start over. We already swaddle, use a pacifier, and noise machine.
I’d leave it and try again in a couple weeks. Max snuggles/coziness now while you’re off – you’ll be back to work and missing snuggles before you know it. Crying often peaks around 8 weeks so you may end up just making yourself and him unhappy unnecessarily because daycare will be a totally new environment anyway so he may sleep in a crib there even when he won’t at home. Maybe try again a week before daycare starts?
+1. Go with your instincts, but daycare will probably be used to making the transition and can probably help. I think it is common to use a different set up at home than at daycare. Everything about the baby changes so much, so fast, that it is impossible to predict how baby will be sleeping in a few weeks. Do what works over your leave and let daycare help you and the baby make the transition when it is time to go to daycare.
Glass-half-full viewpoint: in a few weeks, this will not be your problem. Do whatever you want to get him to nap now (stroller nap, swing, rock n play) and then in a few weeks someone else will have to deal with him.
Any chance kiddo has reflux or a drippy nose? The incline of the rock and play can help with both of those things.
If your kiddo naps in the Rock n Play, let him nap in the Rock n Play. Daycare will do what daycare needs to do, or kiddo won’t nap at daycare until toddler program. Either way, it’s OK.
-spoken by a mom whose child napped only on someone’s shoulder for the first 6 months, never napped in a crib at school, and now sleeps 2+ hours a day on a toddler cot
+ 4 to let someone else worry about the transition. We used the swing for the first 14 weeks for basically every nap (crib was fine at night). Daycare was a different environment so he seemed to accept sleeping in a crib there for naps and the swing at home. Once he outgrew the swing a couple of months later, he was fine to sleep in his crib at home for naps.
Maddie Ross says
+1000 to all the let daycare deal with it for naps. They have ways of making it happen. Don’t ruin your last days of leave with a miserable baby. That said, when you want to move him to a crib at night from a RnP, I cannot recommend the “Magic Merlin” sleep suit enough. Our LO loved it and it made the transition so much easier. It kept her swaddled in and warm (like a RnP), and kept us from being worried about rolling. Loved it!
If you are still wanting to try and do something, have you tried letting your baby nap in a non-crib non-RNP setting? Swing, your bed (with you there), on the floor propped up on a boppy, etc? Perhaps break the “RNP is the only place to sleep!” cycle since at daycare, they may just let sleeping babies lie (ours did) and your baby may end up napping on the floor :)
Thank you all! I was concerned about not creating bad habits by reverting back to the RnP (probably not an issue at this age anyway), but I will just try to put him in the crib for one nap a day and if it doesn’t work, stick with the RnP.
I transitioned my first kid by making the crib as much like a RNP as possible. I elevated the mattress by putting a thin folded towel under one side. Then I rolled up two more towels and put the towel tubes under the sheet. When I put baby in the crib I would snuggle the tubes next to them, with the tubes not starting until the her shoulders so there was nothing next to her face. This all helped immensely. Then gradually I backed the tubes away and took the towel out from under the mattress. I found this method on Google.
Second (third?)ing the let daycare deal with it route. We had this same problem. After one month of daycare naps in the crib we braced ourselves for the full nighttime crib transition. Turned out to be no big deal by that point. Someone else mentioned making the crib more like a rock n play – it didn’t come to this for us but there are some very detailed descriptions of this if you google.
My kid never napped in a crib until he was much, much older, or at daycare. And even at daycare they’d start out the ‘fussy’ babies in the swings, and then switch them into cribs once they conked out. Daycare also tended to have smaller cribs on wheels that the ladies would rock a bit to help him settle down. Some babies just don’t like cribs for naps, do what gets you both the most sleep for now and don’t worry about it.
After spending the last year falling asleep on her own and sleeping peacefully in her crib most nights, kiddo has been struggling (a) to fall asleep alone and (b) to stay asleep alone in her crib. She wails unless someone is with her in her room. She doubles down on the screaming by throwing her leg over the side of crib, as if to threaten that she will jump out (which I’m sure she can, although she hasn’t yet).
So, is it worth taking the side off her crib and trying out a toddler bed to see if that helps? I’m afraid this is separation anxiety, so I’m not sure a bed is any better than a crib, but I’m willing to try it to get back my hour of personal time in the evening.
Anon for this says
I’m an associate trying to lateral to another firm. I got an interview (yay!) and they requested a writing sample (ok) and 3 references. I’m currently employed and don’t want my employer knowing that I am looking for another job. How do I respond?
Do you have 3 references that don’t include your current employer? If you can scrounge them up, I would, just to simply things. Perhaps list underneath the references: “Please do not contact current employer (Jones & Smith LLP) without notice.” If you don’t have 3 other references, I’d include your Jones & Smith references with the same proviso underneath.
When I was in this situation, I typically gave a reference from my pre-law school career, a prof for whom I TAed in law school and a senior associate friend at my current employer that wouldn’t let the firm know I was looking.
If your firm is like mine, it has a policy against providing any references and will just confirm date of employment, position and salary, so current employer references aren’t meaningful. I had one prospective employer insist on references who would speak to my work as an attorney and that firm was willing to accept copies of my reviews.