Family Friday: Active MadeForSun Skort

Question for parents of children with long curly hair: when did your kids start taking care of their hair themselves? Swimming and sweaty sports mean a lot of hair-washing for our curly 8 year old. Her hair is mid-back length and prone to tangles. After a lot of experimenting we have a washing and conditioning routine that works ok for her hair, but she can’t execute on that routine herself. Trust me on that, we try from time to time and she doesn’t have the patience to detangle. We’re not aiming for perfection, just to avoid a giant matted clump. She loves her curls. Cutting her hair short is not an option. Wondering when your curly kids might have started competently handling at least the in-shower portion of their routine.

For parents of kids with autism, can you share any helpful annecdata you have learned about your kid and being a parent of a kid with autism (and how old your kid is and what you do for school, summers, etc.)?

My daughter went to regular daycare and has gone to regular school. She went to a Y nature camp in the summer that she aged out of and a city Y daycamp that she hated because it was so noisy. She had some trouble in K with sitting during circle time and got an ADHD diagnosis. After a few years, it seemed to us that it didn’t fully capture her struggles and it was hard for her to do things with other kids her age that she wanted to be friends with. The autism diagnosis didn’t come until COVID and we are just getting off of waitlists for any services (some are very hit or miss or the providers constantly change).

We waited for years to get into ABA therapy, but they wanted us to commit to 40 hours a week, and that seems crazy for a kid who until recently wasn’t even autistic (and I have a job that I’d like not to lose). So we finally passed on that, but I’m not sure what I should do. Puberty may or may not also be making things very rough right now — it hits very early for girls in our family. I am just not sure what to do and there is no roadmap. Autistic kids are also very unique — we don’t need to be in the “playgroups in locked play areas” FB group because that has never been an issue, but I feel bad that my daughter has trouble making friends as some of her social skills are not typical for teen girls (the pandemic may be partially at fault there as our schools were closed for a year and a half, but autism and having few oppotunities to interact are true challenges and will likely continue to be).

Apologies in advance for the novel. Tl;dr – would you move one (expensive) neighborhood over to send your kids to a “better” school much later? My kids are 6 and under. Our elementary school is great. Middle school is good. Our neighborhood feeds into a rough 7-8 grade campus. High school is good. My husband wants to move ASAP so we can be in a better feeder for 7-8 grade campus. On the one hand I get it because he moved around a ton for middle and high school and it was hard on him. On the other, I kind of think this is bananas because our oldest is starting first grade. We don’t even know if we will stay in this city long-term. I’m also biased against the idea of moving because the neighborhood he wants to move to is extremely wealthy and white. Our are of solidly average intelligence level. Don’t get me wrong: I love my kids and they can be astrophysicists if they want, but they don’t seem to be extremely inclined toward academics, which is fine! I guess I’m just hesitant to join that rat race. Am I just being selfish and myopic? I know my kids falling in with a bad crowd could have serious consequences: I just don’t think this is an urgent decision that needs to be made immediately. I also think my husband may be having a midlife crisis and thinks moving would be a “way forward” when he feels stuck. So maybe from that perspective I should be supportive? There’s a lot going on here. Thanks for reading.

Very low stakes question. My kid’s bday party is next week. We got reusable water balloons to put in the goody bags. How many should we put in? I have…a lot…but I also have another kiddo’s party coming up this summer that I could use them for, so I don’t need to use them all. Do I do:

A. One reusable water balloon, filled with candy, and call the whole thing the goody bag?
B. Two balloons packed flat, plus some candy, in a bag. (is two a weird number? Do I stuff one inside the other and skip the bag?)
C. Three balloons, two folded inside with a ring pop. They’re kinda expensive so 3 seems like a lot, but like I said, I have them so I can use them if you need a minimum of 3 for a good time :)