This post may contain affiliate links and CorporetteMoms may earn commissions for purchases made through links in this post. As an Amazon Associate, I earn from qualifying purchases.
My oldest just got a new bike — it’s making me think of getting one too!
This sturdy wall-mount bike rack will help me make the most of our single-car garage. It mounts your bikes vertically, saving space, and it has adjustable hanging hooks that accommodate a wide range of bikes.
It even has a small shelf and additional hooks for helmets, water bottles, and other bike accessories.
The Koova Wall Bike Rack is available at Amazon. In addition to a 2-bike rack, it also comes in 3- and 4-bike rack models.
Sales of note for 4.18.24
(See all of the latest workwear sales at Corporette!)
- Ann Taylor – 50% off full-price dresses, jackets & shoes; $30 off pants & skirts; extra 50% off sale styles
- Banana Republic Factory – Up to 50% off everything; extra 20% off purchase
- Eloquii – 50% off select styles; 60% off swim; up to 40% off everything else
- J.Crew – Mid-Season Sale: Extra 60% off sale styles; up to 50% off spring-to-summer styles
- Lands’ End – 30% off full-price styles
- Loft – Spring Mid-Season Sale: Up to 50% off 100s of styles
- Nordstrom: Free 2-day shipping for a limited time (eligible items)
- Talbots – Spring Sale: 40% off + extra 15% off all markdowns; 30% off new T by Talbots
- Zappos – 29,000+ women’s sale items! (check out these reader-favorite workwear brands on sale, and some of our favorite kids’ shoe brands on sale)
Kid/Family Sales
- Carter’s – Up to 70% off baby items; 50% off toddler & kid deals & 40% off everything else
- Hanna Andersson – Up to 50% off spring faves; 25% off new arrivals; up to 30% off spring
- J.Crew Crewcuts – Up to 60% off sale styles; up to 50% off kids’ spring-to-summer styles
- Old Navy – 30% off your purchase; up to 75% off clearance
- Target – Car Seat Trade-In Event (ends 4/27); BOGO 25% off select skincare products; up to 40% off indoor furniture; up to 20% off laptops & printers
TTC anon says
Does the hive have any advice on trying to conceive?
My husband and I are going to start trying next month. I wanted it to be a laid back and fun experience (after wedding planning which got pretty stressful) but I’m already finding myself reading up on basal body temperature and ovulation test strips etc. How did you strike a balance between maximizing your chances without finding the process too all consuming? Advice on that or TTC more generally would be very gratefully received!
Anon says
I just stopped using birth control (condoms, for us) and got pregnant immediately. Certainly not everyone finds it that easy, but people who have problems generally share more often than those for whom it was easy, and it’s important to remember that there’s a big range of experiences.
TBH if you’re recently married and <35 I would just stop using birth control, and try not to stress about it for at least six months, if not a year. If you’re 35+ and certainly if you’re 40+ then there’s more time pressure.
AwayEmily says
First kid I used cheap ovulation sticks + temping + whatever and found it all quite confusing/stressful, especially since my luteal phase was wonky. Also it took like a year to get pregnant. With 2nd and 3rd I decided I was willing to spend some $$ for more certainty so got the ClearBlue “advanced digital” (which gives you a better sense of your fertile window than the regular ClearBlue) and got pregnant within two months both times, with much less stress. So I guess know yourself — for me it was very worth the money to have the dumb little smiley faces tell me what was going on with my body rather than obsessing over temperature variations.
AIMS says
Humility. TTC can be a really difficult process or not, and you won’t know what hand you’re dealt until you go through it. It took me over a year to conceive my 1st, to the point where it was really depressing when I would see people have babies while we were still trying. My 2nd was a total accident. We were vaguely trying to avoid pregnancy and I figured it was so hard with no. 1, no way I would have an accidental no. 2 and whoops…
I think if you’re a naturally type A person who makes excel spreadsheets and reads up on body temperature, you probably won’t relax entirely and maybe it won’t matter and you will just get pregnant quickly (or you won’t and all that will become useful) but I would just give yourself 6 months to enjoy the process without worrying about it. Buy some good prenatal vitamins, track your period, don’t eat too much high mercury seafood, try to be active, and don’t worry about the rest.
If you really need to be proactive, maybe get one of those home ovulation kits to use one month to confirm you are ovulating. If you need another strategy, and it doesn’t happen right away, my doctor said every other day is better than every day during your peak window.
Anonymous says
I have experienced both infertility and anxiety, so I say this with a lot of compassion. My main advice would be to chill. Stop reading about basal body temp and pick up a hobby or binge watch a show. Try to make the process fun. Have some wine, if that’s your thing. Thinking about my infertility journey, the times I look back on with fondness were when we were having s3x to have fun and because we love each other, not when we were obsessing over conceiving and timing and doing it “correctly”. Lastly, if you haven’t already, DO NOT tell friends and family you are TTC. Best of luck!
Anon says
The balance that I struck was using ovulation test strips, which you can get on Amazon relatively cheaply for a lot. When I started to use those, I also realized that I have physical signs of ovulation as well (ECM). I also had been off the pill for about 6 months prior to trying (we used other means of BC during that time) and was tracking my cycle. I found all of this to be really empowering as it gave me more control and knowledge over my body with little stress and anxiety to me or to my partner. Once I had a handle on my cycle, I would try to initiate at least every other day around my ovulation. Also, all of that information about my body would have been helpful to know if we did have issues after 6 months trying for any type of referral to a specialist.
Anon says
-Autocorrect fail, EWCM
Anon says
Also TTC and am using the strips, but nothing more for now (this is the first month of trying). My best friend found the strips increased her anxiety, but for me, I find them empowering to observe the changes in my body that I see you at the same time as the strips. I also know myself and that I will kick myself if I miss the right window simply because I got it wrong on my own. It may take time, even years, to conceive, but I don’t want to waste time.
Good luck to you!!
Anon says
Oh, I forgot to mention that we both cleaned up our diets etc in advance – multivitamins for both, no alcohol or other known carcinogens within our control, held off on a few house projects that involve toxic chemicals, avoided DH starting a certain new acne medication, etc.
Anonymous says
Most of which is not evidence based and wildly unnecessary but do you! But to anyone else reading, enjoy your alcohol if you life it while you can!
Anon says
You don’t think it’s necessary or evidence-based to avoid taking known teratogenic medications while trying to conceive? Good thing you’re not my doctor…
Anonymous says
Eyeroll
Anon says
Clearly from the above replies this is so person dependent! I love science and am in a medical related field so ovulation test strips were fun/nerdy/fascinating to me. They were easy for me to do in the evenings after work and didn’t stress me out at all (even when I was dealing with secondary infertility). I quickly learned that temp charting WAS stressful for me so I skipped it. There are also plenty of apps that will tell you your likely fertile window based on your periods if you’d rather not do any testing.
Anon says
Also- I liked the Premom app for monitoring the test strips. When I started dealing with the infertility stuff Fertility Friend was nice for more intense tracking/details.
Anonymous says
Seconding Premom – the made sense of the ovulations strips in a way that I couldn’t (way harder than I thought it would be and so much room for error) and it was successful for me.
Anon says
FYI, Premom is in trouble with the FTC: “The Federal Trade Commission charged that the developer of the fertility app Premom deceived users by sharing their sensitive personal information with third parties, including two China-based firms, disclosed users’ sensitive health data to AppsFlyer and Google, and failed to notify consumers of these unauthorized disclosures in violation of the Health Breach Notification Rule (HBNR).”
https://www.ftc.gov/news-events/news/press-releases/2023/05/ovulation-tracking-app-premom-will-be-barred-sharing-health-data-advertising-under-proposed-ftc
Anonymous says
God I hate the name Premom. How dehumanizing. Even trying to conceive I am not a premom.
Anon says
This is why I detest “people who can get pregnant.” I am not defined by my reproductive potential.
Anonymous says
Right. Men don’t get pregnant. If you hate being a woman so much you want us all to pretend you’re a man WTF are you doing getting pregnant.
Anon says
I also find “Premom” pretty offputting.
Anonymous says
Testing/strips put my anxiety through the roof so we stuck with the every other day method from What to Expect Before You’re Expecting. Basically every other day throughout your cycle. To keep it fun we set a goal of doing it in every room of our new house and made a list of things you can’t easily do after kids – like spontaneously get a hotel after being out to dinner and get it on in the hotel.
Anonymous says
FWIW we didn’t get pregnant the first month when I was testing and stressed but got pregnant the next month when doing this and got pregnant the first month we did this on my second pregnancy.
An.On. says
I had a very regular cycle and just used an app tracker to find optimal windows, but that was before the Roe v Wade was overturned.
Anon says
Honestly, my advice is to figure out when you’re likely ovulating and then have sex every other day around that window. That’s pretty much it. Take a prenatal, but don’t make any other changes.
Anon says
My doctor says have sex every other day whenever you’re not on your period. Although I think this assumes you’re generally in the same place. If one spouse travels a lot for work your probably need to be more intentional about figuring out ovulation windows.
Anonymous says
DH travels a fair bit and we just focused on doing the deed right before he left and right when he got back. His trips are usually less than a week though.
Anonymous says
If you want laid back and fun it’s not hard. Stop reading, start having lots of sex. All the advice is bascially for is trying to make sure you’re having sex at the right time. If you’re just doing it a lot, you don’t need all of that!
Anon says
You know, in reading this again, my biggest advice is don’t think worse of yourself because you’re more Type A. There are a lot of people out there who absolutely love to neg on Type A people – “you need to chill,” “just go with the flow,” “you’re not relaxed enough,” when it comes to this or anything else. You’re fine as you are and you’ll find what works for you. Trust yourself and experiment with a few things and don’t let the “I’m so chill, why aren’t you” types get you down. Their insecurities don’t have to be yours.
Vicky Austin says
This is a great, compassionate take. I like the advice to just stop birth control, have as much sex as feels fun, and see what happens. You can set yourself a 3 month reminder to revisit things like BBT and ovulation tests.
Anonymous says
I love this advice. Knowing myself, I just could not relax during TTC #1. Luckily I had a Type A doctor who complied with additional testing and pointing me to clear blue easy ovulation kit. She told me “In my experience, when people plan pregnancies they’re usually ready to get pregnant right that second”. It took us 7 stressful months with #1, and #2 was unplanned margarita night “it was just one time!” :)
anonforthis says
The only other thing I would add to what others have said is that it’s important to consider how often you are doing “it” naturally/ with birth control. The advice to do it every other day around your cycle is great, but if you’re a naturally lower-occurrence couple, especially if the husband has a lower drive, this could create a really unfortunate dynamic where one or both of you are feeling forced to perform and then that will take away the “fun” aspect, even if others see it as the “no stress” way.
If you’re an anxious person by nature, as I am, then you’ll often run into the situation of wanting to know what the expectation is & wanting to meet/exceed the expectation. The reality, as with much of parenting, is that everyone’s journey is different.
I fully expected to need fertility treatments due to PCOS so I was planning to not get pregnant the first year & using that as my start into infertility treatments. Even though I knew this, I still got disappointed when my period came. Then I actually got pregnant in my 6 or 7th month of trying and was a little shocked it had happened so quickly.
It’s important to recognize where you’re operating from. If it’s “I want to get pregnant ASAP but hope that it can be fun too” that’s one thing, if it’s “I want to keep having fun & if I end up pregnant great” that’s another or “I want this to be fun, but I know myself and know that I want more control/awareness” that’s a third.
In hindsight, it’s been interesting to see b/c we are a lower drive couple, but I got pregnant very quickly/not trying with 2 & 3 & it’s almost like I was giving off fertility vibes or something.
There is no “right” or “wrong” way to build a family. Best of luck on your journey.
Anonymous says
We have to keep my 3.5 year old son home from daycare today because he has a cough (not too serious, and he tested negative for Covid, but we’d like to keep him out of crowded indoor areas). I work from home and have a big project going on that I need to focus on for at least most of the work day. My husband is currently between jobs, so he can stay home and hang out with our kid. However, our kid cannot understand why mom has to stay in the office and he’s flipping out about it. We’re going through some mom-preference issues anyway, and this is making it worse. Any suggestions?
Boston Legal Eagle says
Have him take your kid out somewhere (outside not near too many people should be fine for a cough). Out of sight, out of mind.
Anon says
This.
NYCer says
+1. Otherwise, you should try to go work from the library or somewhere similar.
AwayEmily says
When my kids have these preferences and I’m in the house, getting them out of the house is the only thing that works to derail the mama obsession. I know you’re trying to avoid crowded indoor spaces, but…a hike? The zoo? A school playground (those should be pretty empty on a summer weekday)? A park with a little river he can splash in? A trip to Costco?
Anon says
One of you needs to get out of the house. Husband needs to take son to an outdoor playground, zoo, park, etc. or you need to take your work to a library, coffee shop, etc. If none of that is possible, Husband needs to firmly keep him away from the office door and hold a hard line on it. I’m also not above bribery for these situations either. Have your husband take him to a store and pick out a new toy that will keep his attention for a bit. Your son will get over it if there is a hard line. Also, try to stay in the office because it will start all over again if he sees you.
anon says
It can help if you go out like you’re leaving for the day, then your husband goes out with the kid, then you sneak back in and stay out of sight. It avoids the fight when nothing else works.
Anonymous says
I would go to the public library to work for the day.
Big girl bed says
Any recs for a full-sized bed for a three year-old? The converted crib with a bedrail on it isn’t cutting it for the bedtime routine, which involves a prolonged cuddle sesh in what used to be the nursing chair and is now way too small for us both to get comfortable in. IKEA, maybe? Tiny bedroom in a row house.
TIA.
anon says
We got a bed off of Wayfair. We got a trundle bed so we could use the room for sleepovers or guests, but for a small room I’d look for a bed with storage. There are different options on Wayfair and Overstock than Ikea.
AwayEmily says
We got our bed from Wayfair too (it’s a bunk). They have some good solid wood options. Ours was Harriet Bee brand. I would have done Ikea but there aren’t any near us. I would say don’t overthink it — get something simple and affordable in solid wood.
Anon says
If you’re not planning on having the bedroom pinch hit as a guest room I’d do a twin bed (we cuddle just fine in ours!) and keep more space in the room for playing or storage
Anon says
Agree. We have plenty of space but ultimately went with a twin + trundle from PB Kids. Very glad we made this choice at the end of the day, and at the time we made it I was convinced we made the wrong one. I’m 6 months pregnant and snuggle with my 5 YO a lot in the twin – it’s not tight at all – and it’s perfect for her.
Anon says
I’d get a twin bed with storage underneath. You could also just put the mattress on the floor for now.
Anonymous says
Ha. We have had a mattress on the floor for almost two years. Kiddo at this point does not actually want a bed but it’s not great for the mattress!
Anon says
How much stock do you put in the exact delays reported by validated developmental screenings? My nephew just tested as quite delayed in fine motor skills, 13 month skills at almost age 3, but his mom and dad feel like the assessment dinged him for things he’s just never tried, like using scissors. We were talking about it and I got curious how valid the results are. It does seem odd to ding a child for not having a skill without asking them to demonstrate the skill, doesn’t it?
Anonymous says
To answer your first question: not much. But 13 month functioning at age 3 is a pretty big gap. I personally would be having conversations with my ped about next steps. My twins were born at 31 weeks, and I noticed delays until about age 2. It was nothing major, except one needed PT for walking, but his therapist confirmed that was really due to him preferring being carried around than to physical impairment or cognitive delays. As for asking stuff they’ve never tried: there is a spot on the ASQ for n/a, I believe. And my ped told me if we hadn’t tried something, drawing a straight line for example, to just try it in the office right then and there.
Clementine says
Oh, this happens a lot. My kid’s speech eval said she made ‘two word sentences’ and the second they left she fully interrogated us using paragraphs of full long sentences.
However. Rationalization is real. My kid does have a speech delay. Your nephew likely has a fine motor delay. The good news is that the worse the eval, the more they qualify for services.
Anonymous says
Day care hasn’t had him doing all this stuff yet?
Anon says
He started a preschool (Montessori) this past spring and was at home before. I don’t think he’s tried scissors at school. He’s pretty rough and tumble and probably wouldn’t be drawn to them there, just like at home…
Anon says
My kid (who seems developmentally and academically average) didn’t use scissors before age 3 at daycare, I don’t think. It wasn’t required in the 2s room and she had other interests.
Anon says
I think our daycare did scissors at age 3, too.
An.On. says
Yeah, I was always trying to be very exact about answering those screenings which usually meant answering no to a couple questions and getting dinged for it. The ped would go over those answers at our appointments and was fairly blase about things we just hadn’t attempted (putting cheerios into a bottle???) or were close but not 100%. If their screening shows kid is behind almost two full years behind, either their doctor is incredibly nit picky or they should be taking this more seriously. There’s a huge gap in skills between 13 and 36 months.
Anonymous says
The cheerios in a bottle test is stupid. You know how many cheerios made it in the bottle? One. The one I used to demonstrate. The rest of the cheerios? Into my kid’s mouth.
Anonymous says
I don’t put a lot of stock in minor 3-6 month delays but a 2 year delay is huge. That’s not just about scissors.
Anon says
I know, that’s what piqued my curiosity too. His parents are planning to follow up with the pediatrician at his upcoming appointment (the evaluation was from a developmental specialist) and take this seriously, but they’re also skeptical and trying not to freak out before they know more, understandably. I’m being supportive in person and keeping my curiosity separate, of course.
Spirograph says
It depends a bit on what led to him being tested to begin with. For example, if he was being tested because his preK teachers expressed concern, I’d put quite a bit of stock in the results matching with the teachers’ observation. To me, it’s not the exact number of months that’s important, just an “intervention is/is not needed” determination… a 2 year delay according to the test is enough that I, like your family, would take it seriously and follow up.
Anon says
He was tested for a possible speech delay originally and has had private sessions with a speech therapist that now have him testing at an average level (yay!). I think all the motor stuff is totally new and unexpected.
Anon says
I find the results vary a lot. It could be a significant delay, but my guess is there is some delay, but not be as significant as the evaluator said. Usually, to qualify for free OT/PT services, the delay needs to be over a specific threshold, so the evaluator may have just put in a delay they were sure would allow your nephew to qualify for free services. They should definitely follow up, but I wouldn’t freak out. Fwiw, Where I live, the evaluators make up their mind, often based on what they’ve been told by whoever requested the eval, and then “find” data to support it. For example, my then-4 year old was evaluated for fine motor and at the end of the eval, the evaluator said his scissor skills were so good, she wasn’t sure how she’d be able to get him services. A week later, the report came and he was assessed as having the fine motor strength of an 18-month old. My child’s teacher – who had suggested the eval – thought that assessment was off base, but it got him OT to work on his hand strength, so the exact wording in the report didn’t matter.
Anon says
Kids will sometimes avoid something if it’s hard for them. It’s totally possible that he avoids fine motor activities because they’re frustrating. So the fact he isn’t practicing the skills naturally is making him even further behind.
If he qualifies, it’s great to work on fine motor skills with an expert before it becomes an academic issue. He has lots of runway before K, when he’ll be expected to write and use scissors. Therapy for a 3 yo for fine motor skills will all feel like games.
My brother, now a normal adult, had speech and fine motor skills therapy as a preschooler. He eventually caught up and graduated around 1st grade. It was helpful that he worked on skills that were hard for him before it became an academic issue.
Anonymous says
It’s unhinged to talk like this? No one is dinging a child. That’s not how these things work. It isn’t a test it’s an assessment and someone was clearly worried. He’s nearly two years delayed and their focus is this?
Anon says
My kid had a gross motor delay, and we did PT and now are almost caught up. The examiner should be able to explain the test more to the parents. These exams are looking for delays that are really out of the realm of “normal,” so most evaluations we did were only flagging our kid if he was below the 20th percentile. That more than accounts for the fact that a kid may not have been exposed to all the activities, etc.
Also– I agree with the poster that said that this kid may be avoiding fine motor activities if he’s not comfortable with them. That is something I noticed with my kid– all of these skills build on each other at a young age, so it’s really easy for them to get behind in many areas if they’re missing some fundamental, building block skill.
Anon says
i know that beach vacations are popular. my parents were not beach people so i didn’t grow up going to the beach a lot. i’d love to know, where you live, the beach you go to and what you do while there (like do you go to the beach every day, other activities, etc.). TIA!
Boston Legal Eagle says
I wouldn’t say we’re beach people, but we do try to take at least one beach trip in the summer with the kids. We usually go to Cape Cod, as that’s the closest to us (North Shore beaches are about 1hr+ away anyway, so not really worth it to go on the weekends!). We used to break up the day for kid naps, although now I suppose we could spend more of the day there. We do other activities during the week though like a local water park, mini golf, bike riding, etc.
Mary Moo Cow says
We’re beach people: one week a year, every year, but more if we can get it. We’re mid-Atlantic, 1.5 hours from beaches in our state but drive 5 hours to a neighboring state for warmer water and less crowded/smaller beach community. Weather permitting, we’re on the beach for hours a day. My kids are elementary age, so no more naps. We go out around 8-10, come in for morning snack, back from 10:30-12, come in for lunch and afternoon movie or indoor activity (to avoid some of the strongest sun), then back from 4-5:30, in for dinner and ice cream and back for a walk on the beach right before bedtime. We rent a house right on the beach. We bring some toys but now that the kids are older, we do some walks & she’ll collecting, boogie boarding, tossing a ball, and reading on the beach. If it’s raining, puzzles, board games, reading, tv inside or if it’s raining and the roads aren’t flooded, driving into the village for a coffee or the bookstore. Once during our stay we might drive to the closest town for a toy store, museum, or movie. We cook most meals but have dinner or lunch out a few times a week and ice cream every day. It is the best week of my year. DH and I don’t bring any work and just soak up the family time.
Boston Legal Eagle says
That sounds lovely! Our kids are old enough for boogie boards this year (at least the 7 year old) and I can see them staying there for hours. We’re a drive from the beach though – I have to book those beach airbnbs a year in advance it seems like!
Anonymous says
My family is not into sitting around all day on the beach in the hot sun. When we do take a beach vacation we stay where we can walk right out onto the beach for a little while, then hose off the sand and come back inside. Generally we walk on the beach every morning and evening. We usually go out and do something during the day–visit a tourist attraction, go to a wildlife viewing spot, take a surfing lesson or kayak tour, go shopping, etc. One or two days we’ll stay at the house and spend a couple of hours playing in the water, then the rest of the day indoors reading, watching movies, and playing games.
Anonymous says
I love the beach! Have great memories of going there growing up, and am excited to recreate those with my kids. We live on the east coast and I grew up going to the NJ beaches, which are a 3-4 hour drive from where I grew up and also where I am now. I am very picky about needing to stay right on the beach because I like having the view but also being able to go out early, come back inside for lunch and quiet time during the heat of the day/highest sun exposure, and then go back out in the afternoon. I also like having a pool available, and ideally I never get in a car the whole time. East coach beaches like Wildwood, Ocean City, Rehoboth, and Cape May are great for that and all have slightly different cultures and and excitement levels, depending on what you’re looking for. We do go on the beach every day when it’s nice- build sand castles, go for walks, play beach games, play in the waves, read (lol at that right now with two young kids but some day!). At night we go for ice cream or check out the boardwalk if there is one.
Spirograph says
I am a mountain/woods person more than a beach person, but we do take a beach vacation each summer right before school starts. We rent a house an easy walk from the beach (2 blocks, max), and yes, we just go to the beach almost every day, with 2 exceptions: We spend one day biking through the nearby state park and stopping at the nature center and historic sites, and one day at the little water park in town. In the evenings we usually wander the boardwalk and go to Funland, play minigolf, or get some ice cream. We often invite extended family to come with us, but this year it will be just us for most of the time (grandparents are coming just for the weekend) and I am so excited!
We rent chairs and umbrellas at the beach so we have a comfy spot with shade, and bring a cooler with Uncrustables, drinks and snacks. The kids are old enough now that they can really spend All. Day. alternating between playing in the sand and boogie boarding/splashing in the surf.
Boston Legal Eagle says
Funland in Rehoboth? It’s a bit of a hike for us but we went there earlier this summer with some friends. It’s a very cool spot and most everything is right there on the boardwalk.
Spirograph says
yup! Rehoboth is an easy drive for us from DCish, and we’ve done the same thing every year for 6 years at this point so it’s basically an autopilot vacation. We asked the kids if they might be too big for Funland this year, but they emphatically said they still want to go.
Anonymous says
We are beach people! Outer banks every year, yes we go to the beach every day. (I know there’s one person on this board who hates OBX but we love it). Time of day depends on the weather that day. We do a few other things, again, weather dependent.
Anon says
IMO, the best beach vacations are active, not sitting around for hours roasting in the sun for five days straight. It’s nice to get the fresh air, but it’s just too sedentary for me (and I’m not some mega-athlete myself). I pick beaches with great bodysurfing, surfing, snorkeling, and other active activities that are engaging. That ratchets up the enjoyment 100x.
anon says
We’ve got our first beach vacation as a family planned next month, and I’m so excited. We’re going to a big lake about an hour away for a long weekend. We’ll probably spend maybe one full day at the beach, or maybe do the mornings there, and then do other stuff (restaurants, mini golf, zoo, hiking, naps, etc) the rest of the time.
Cb says
We live quite near to (cold, North Sea) beaches but have had a beach vacation with my husband’s cousin and her family two years running. It’s not super warm, but we play on the beach, build sandcastles, eat ice cream, go to the bookshop etc
Anon says
We live in the Midwest with young kids so beach trips have been our main vacations lately (either family trips or adult long weekend getaways). Either way, we tend to go to the beach for a half day every day. I always want to get cleaned up after the beach, so when I’m done I’m done for the day. Last week we went to South Haven, Michigan. Some days we did restaurant breakfast + playground, earlier nap and then beach for the rest of the day including dinner. Other days we’d do beach morning, late nap, early restaurant dinner and walking around “downtown”. Beach time is usually playing with sand toys and in the water. Adults only Turks and Caicos trip last year was some kind of activity (parasailing, jet skiing, snorkeling) in the morning or afternoon, lunch on the beach and laying on beach chairs reading the rest of the time with occasional dips in the water. We’d pack in around 4 or 5, get cleaned up and chill for a little bit and then head out for dinner.
Anon says
I have access to a multigenerational beach house down the shore (south Jersey). We usually go for 1-2 weeks a summer (as much as we can manage PTO wise!) and ~8ish weekends or long weekends throughout the summer. We live in Philly and it’s just under 2 hours for us.
It’s a little chaotic because the house is shared between my parents , aunt and uncle, my sister, my cousin and me plus our spouses and kids. The house is big enough that we can all be there at once!
We easily spend 6+ hours a day on the beach. Our house is a block from the beach so it’s very easy to go back and forth as needed. We go to the beach in all sorts of weather (pretty much only stay home if it’s raining hard or thundering and lightening). On the beach we do a whole host of activities; swimming / jumping waves / surfing / body surfing, playing in the sand, taking walks, reading (justtt starting to be able to do this again) and playing all sorts of games: catch, jackpot, spike ball, catch, football, whatever.
We also go to the bay (there’s a public dock in town) for swimming, floating on rafts, kayaking and SUPing (we own 2 kayaks and 2 SUPs). We try to get to the bay every day but it is tide dependent. We also go fishing or crabbing at the dock.
We go on bike rides and walks almost every day. Our house is one block from a playground so we go there almost daily too. We’re 4 blocks from tennis and bocce courts so play on occasion.
A few times a summer we do something out of our routine for fun: walk a few blocks into town for ice cream, mini golf, the arcade, or dinner. We also go to a neighboring town’s boardwalk for rides once a summer. Our town does quite a few fun activities too: sandcastle contest, magician show in the park, concerts in the park, nighttime movies on the beach, farmers market, etc that we go to as often as we can.
Most evenings we just hang at the house: post-beach snacks and “happy hour” on the deck, dinner on the deck, and then playing in the yard or at the playground, movie night or game night.
We spend pretty much all day every day outside: the beach, the bay, biking, but also we only have an outdoor shower and we eat all of our meals on the deck too.
We live walking and biking distance to everything, we pretty much never move our car!
It’s my favorite place in the world. My mom grew up here, I was lucky enough to grow up here and now my kids are lucky enough to grow up here!
Anonymous says
This sounds awesome! I’m jealous!
Anon says
My family weren’t beach people either. But this year we took a family vacation with my parents and my sister and brother-in-law. My brother-in-law’s family were beach people and always went to Sandbridge, Virginia, so that’s where we went. We were about a 6 hour drive away. We like this location because of the small town feel with houses rather than large condos/crowds, but it is close enough to Virginia Beach to go to for the afternoon/evening. We go in the early summer before the full rental rates start. The weather is nice, but it’s not blazing hot. We like to spend part of the day on the beach, part of the day at the pool at the house, go to the aquarium, playgrounds, going to strawberry farms, etc.
AwayEmily says
We are LAKE PEOPLE! Rent a house on a lake with a sandy beach and pontoon boat. Swim in the lake all morning. Have lunch, followed by a hike/read/nap (YMMV), then at 3pm everyone hops in the pontoon boat with some drinks and snacks and we motor around the lake, with some swimming breaks, then come back for dinner on the deck. My favorite kind of vacation.
(we have been Lake People in northern Michigan, Minnesota, the Adirondacks, and the Poconos — luckily there are lots of lakes around!).
Anon says
There’s beach and then there’s beach. We go to the Maine coast every summer but rarely go to the actual beach. We’re mostly there for hiking, boating, lake swimming and food. On trips to other coastal areas we might go to the beach for a day but rarely make a whole week of it.
To me a “beach vacation” means a week where your main goal is beach/pool and we only do that in Florida and the Caribbean. It’s not my favorite thing but it’s fun and it’s a pretty low stress vacation with little kids.
Anonymous says
I have a lot of trouble sleeping when I’m stressed or anxious or traveling for work…which is somewhat frequently! I sometimes use melotonin for a spell, and when I’m really desperate I’ll take Nyquil. But what else should I be doing? It’s not a chronic thing, so I don’t think I need to eliminate caffeine or anything like that (I drink two caffeinated drinks per day, max, in any case). It’s just very much tied to things like work deadlines and big projects. Short of quitting my job, I’m not sure what to do! It’s been especially bad this summer, as we’ve had imperfect child care coverage due to camp schedules, etc.
Anon says
I’m sure this isn’t sanctioned by a doctor, but I put in one ear bud and listen to an audiobook. I end up back to sleep quickly because thinking about something breaks any anxiety spirals.
Vicky Austin says
Honestly, this is also kinda what works for me – I use old episodes of Bake Off, but same idea.
Anonymous says
This is me too.
Anonie says
I do this literally every night, I discovered it about 4 years ago to quiet my anxiety and have kept doing it bc it works… why would a doctor not approve?
Mary Moo Cow says
Same here. I’ve tried melatonin and magnesium but both actually disrupted my sleep even more (I tried each for about 2 weeks and when I quit, slept better beginning the next night.) When I remember to do, journaling right before bed helps. Commiserating!
AwayEmily says
It really helps me to read for a half hour before bed — nothing stressful. Genre fiction, usually. It gets me out of my head.
I also take a Unisom sometimes — I took them with B6 during pregnancy and found they worked well for me so I break them out every now and again for sleep help.
Anonymous says
Natural clam magnesium powder (unflavored) and listening to a podcast or audiobook. I am a. Big fan of the sleephones headphones. Bluer hood and or laws flat against your head, which I find more comfortable than earbuds or AirPods.
OOO says
What time of day are you drinking caffeine? I also drink two cups in the morning but if I drink caffeine after noon it disrupts my sleep. When I have trouble sleeping due to stress I will take one or two 5 mg CBD gummies (I like Martha Stewart’s brand)
An.On. says
I’ve taken half doses of benadryl or xanax for this purpose (at doctor’s recommendation). For me, it’s both anxiety/stress and habit – once I wake up at 3:30 am a couple times in a row my body just keeps doing it even when the outside stress is gone, so I will use the pills to “reset”. For me, I haven’t found a non-pill solution aside from going on vacation.
Anon says
I mean, the answer is to work on the cause (stress, anxiety), not the symptoms (insomnia). I *know* that it is impossible to get rid of work stress, but I think you can work on some coping mechanisms that will in turn improve your sleep. Like, meditation/mindfulness or exercise or yoga or whatever.
Anon says
I see an endocrinologist for thyroid stuff but he apparently knows quite a bit about sleep medicine too. He feels strongly that melatonin is the best pharmaceutical option. He’s very against antihistimines because long-term use is linked to dementia and a variety of other health issues. I did get a prescription for hydroxyzine (basically prescription strength Benadryl) during a particularly bad bout of insomnia. I weaned myself off it and now only need it before flights (so once or twice a month). I think NyQuil has antihistimines in it, so probably not great to use regularly but if it’s very occasional I don’t think it’s that big a deal.
anon says
Another, but slightly different, kid reading/writing question. My rising second grader generally reads well and above grade level, and mostly got 100s on her weekly first grade spelling tests. However, she occasionally will transpose letters when reading or phonetically spelling a word. For example, she’ll read or write something like “tired” as “tried,” and it takes mutliple prompts from me to try again, and specifically to check the order of the letters, before she realizes the mistake (if she even recognizes it at all). It doesn’t happen all the time, but enough that I’ve noticed it. Is this normal at this age? She does have ADHD, so maybe it’s related? Or is this something else?
Anonymous says
Normal. Especially for words that are so close. I wouldn’t worry unless this is still an issue in a year or two.
Boston Legal Eagle says
She had weekly spelling tests in first grade?! Here, the teachers said they don’t really worry about teaching spelling until at least second/third grade. My kid (also rising second grader) writes things out phonetically so spelling is very off, but I’m not worried. I also wouldn’t worry about the above at this age.
FWIW, there has been a lot about reading/writing lately – if it helps anyone else, my kid has not read a single book all summer, but he was able to read in 1st grade so I’m not too concerned. I look to the teachers to tell me if they’re on grade level.
anon says
My kids’ school started spelling tests in K…it’s kind of crazy.
Anon says
i mean i do this sometimes and i’m 38, which is why for something important i like to ask someone else to proofread
Anon says
This is normal even for adults. My name is similar to another name, except two letters are transposed. On average, 99.9% of adults get it wrong, even after they’ve been corrected.
OP anon says
Thanks for the reassurance! At one of our previous adhd appts with the developmental ped, she asked if kid had been evaluated for any specific learning disabilities (not related to letter transposing, just when we were discussing various symptoms and whether to start meds, which we did). I haven’t noticed anything that makes me super suspicious about LD, and teachers haven’t flagged anything along those lines, but I’m trying to be better about noticing and making notes of anything in advance of upcoming 504 review meeting and our next check-up.
And yes, I was surprised by the spelling tests in first grade too! Although I think they were designed more to support the phonics concepts of the week, as each week there was a “theme” of sorts, like short vs. long “o,” so the short list of words included hop and hope.
Anon says
My inattentive ADHD kiddo does things like this all the time, and it’s always been chalked up to lack of focus/getting distracted.
More Sleep Would Be Nice says
Thank you for all the responses re Early Intervention and private ST! HSAL and other poster, I did not take anything you said unkindly, it actually really resonated and is something I’m trying to work through.
Posting for further context – I welcome any thoughts, and appreciate folks reading my novels.
Further context: DS #1 was born full term, but low birth-weight. We had a new-to-us ped at the time (DS #1 was born in another state), and despite multiple red and yellow flags, I kept on with her due to the PP haze. She was obsessed with DS #1 being “on” the growth curve – despite him consistently gaining weight and hitting baby milestones, constantly referred us out to specialists, and gave advice I just found…not great as a second-time mum that had more context.
We switched peds, and although I trusted the second practice, their office staff/admin and the wait for even a scheduled appointment was always a nightmare (for a 9 AM checkup, I’d get out of there close to 11 AM). When DS #2 wasn’t walking at ~16 months they referred us to neuro, early intervention, and a developmental specialty clinic for eval. My gut told me this was overkill, but I also didn’t want to be a parent that just kicked things under the rug. We opted for the neuro, who was great and told us she didn’t have concerns. Since the wait for EI was so long, I enrolled DS #2 in private PT around 18 months, and he started walking somewhere between 18 and 19 months. The PT didn’t see any root-cause issue with his late walking, and after a couple months of 2x/week sessions, we stopped services.
Somewhere in that time, we had the early intervention eval – which was painful, per the posts above, I do not understand some of what they ask – and they said he had a slight cognitive delay that might impact speech, but not “enough” of a delay for speech therapy, and recommended 2x/month play therapy. We did it for a while and while the specialist was great it seemed…not like he needed it, and was better off just playing in preK/daycare. His last session of this was in November of last year, and then travel, holidays, etc. In January I let early intervention know we were interested in speech, if anything at all. For some time, we had an in-person therapist, but then she left, and now we’re working with a great therapist but only virtual until they re-hire.
That’s what brings me to this point. I feel like DS #2 would benefit from probably some finite coaching, but I see him getting where he needs to be eventually, just on the lower end of “normal”, which is FINE with me. I think the answer for him is probably private speech therapy for a period of time (if anything) and/or it could just be me and DH spending some more time with him on some speech skills.
But for me I still struggle with the line between over intervening and letting things be, I think as a result of the type of well-meaning but overly cover-your-a** medical care we received the first ~18 months of his life. Ironic because I work in health care administration, and should understand why practices like the ones we had before refer out for every little thing. Thankfully now we have a medical provider that’s much more of a fit, but I want to make sure we don’t “miss” anything, so I feel like I’m constantly issue-spotting vs. just letting things be.
Would love to hear anyone else’s experiences if you’ve navigated something similar.
Anon says
I haven’t had the same experiences, because we’ve had a pretty laidback ped from the get-go that we’ve always trusted, but I do have a kid who has always been…I don’t know if “lazy” is the right word, but content to do things on her own timeframe and probably not particularly gifted physically. And the combination of those two things means that she has been late to a LOT of developmental milestones. Moreso physical stuff than speech (she walked at almost 18 months), but she was also not a particularly early or advanced talker, so it was kind of hard sometimes to hear “kids are either walkers or talkers” because mine wasn’t doing much of either until *well* into her second year of life. She’s 5 now and entering kindergarten and you wouldn’t know about the delays. She is not the fastest or strongest kid in her class, in fact, she’s probably below average, but she doesn’t appear out of the normal range and I don’t think all the PT in the world would have made her a top athlete, given her genetics. We have tried a variety of preschool sports over the years. She seems pretty terrible at most ball sports and anything like gymnastics that involves being a bit of a daredevil, but has been enjoying dance, which seems to be helping with flexibility, balance and coordination (as well as various social-emotional skills) and she’s a surprisingly good mini-golfer. :) Generally I subscribe to the philosophy that if peds and teachers aren’t expressing concern, I shouldn’t be worried. Sometimes I do worry, but I try to at least not act on the worry.
Anon says
I left you a comment…I think maybe it’s gone to m0d so check back tomorrow.
Anonymous says
If support will help him, get it. Idk why you’d be find settling on his behalf for a lifetime of lower end of normal if you can help get up to normal normal.
Anonymous says
Where do you buy boys’ athletic clothing from? I normally shop at Walmart but the quality is what you pay for. We’ve been given some under armour shorts that last but those are pricey. Any suggestions for in between? He’s a size xs, if that matters.
Anon says
I think you can get that brand at places like Kohl’s for relatively cheap (less than $15 per pair).
Anonymous says
Old Navy or Mountain Warehouse. Sometimes Costco for Puma/Adidas.
Vicky Austin says
I was going to suggest Old Navy. Kohl’s is also a good idea.
Anonymous says
Under armor outlet. They have really good sales.
Anonymous says
This. My boys live in under armor, but we get most of it from Dick’s. We stock up when we get the Little League coupon in the spring :)
Anonymous says
My girls wear gap athletic and athleta (on sale) plus stuff from the UA outlet.