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My daughter has an older version of these shoes and wears them almost daily.
These comfortable shoes from Sketchers have a laceless design, knitted and breathable upper, and a cushioned memory foam insole. The stretchy sock-like fit accommodates a range of widths. And if they get dirty or scuffed, just throw them in the wash.
Sketchers’ Ultra Flex 3.0 is $49.95 and comes both little kid and big kid whole and half sizes in three multicolor prints.
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Kid/Family Sales
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anon says
My daughter is on her second pair of these shoes. I love that they don’t have laces and she says they are very comfy, but be warned that the sole wears out quickly. She’ll probably be getting another pair before summer even if her size doesn’t change.
GCA says
Yeah, we have a version of these and love them but they don’t last. They’re super lightweight, comfy and easy to put on. But kid has worn hers out before outgrowing them. Same with the Skechers velcro light-up ones we have. (She loves them to death, essentially.)
Spirograph says
My daughter has also had a couple pair of these. I agree that they don’t hold up as well as some other more athletic sneakers, but she loooooves them. And her feet are still growing fast enough that I’m not too worried about longevity.
Cb says
Oh these are nice! My 5 year old is on his last “little kid” UK size and I was worried as the big kid size all seem to have laces.
When they were weighing him after he was born, I looked over and said “that baby has really huge feet!” and it has stayed through. “Do I need flippers for swim lessons, mumma?” “Nope, you’ve got built in ones!”
Anon says
I feel you, my almost two-year-old is about to move into size 9 shoes…very large feet!
TheElms says
The pain is real – 3 year old (she’ll be 4 soon) in size 12!!
Anonymous says
I have a very large footed child and there are definitely still Velcro options up to at least big kids size 5, if you buy online. However, by this age (7) the ability to adjust fit is way better with tie shoes- we’ve broken a lot of Velcro.
Signed,
I wear an 11, my 7 year old wears a 5 and my 4 year old just started size 1.
GCA says
You can replace the laces with elastics made for this very purpose!
Anon says
Have other people had good experience with Skechers? We got my kid a pair of light-up ones for Hanukkah and they are already completely worn out, they have holes in the toe area in both shoes and the velco is totally shot. She’s 5 and not easy on her stuff, but before this she had a pair of Adidas she wore for over a year with much more minimal damage. It’s really put me off the Skechers brand but maybe it was a fluke. Or maybe the light-up shoes are shoddy quality regardless of brand?
anon says
Agree, Sketchers is basically junk in my experience at the elementary age. They wear out super fast- we had a pair of light-up sketchers from December that are worn out. Our Vans lasted from August – December with daily wear to K, which I thought was good enough. We are trying a pair of Pumas now so we’ll see…
Anonymous says
I’ve sort of decided my kid is just hard on shoes. Bought him Adidas, he dragged his toes on his balance bike and ruined them. Now I buy shoes from Target mostly. He goes up in sizes often enough that I usually switch before there are holes, but sometimes he comes home from school looking like a ragamuffin and I know it’s time for new shoes.
Anon says
Yah, I’ve yet to find a sneaker brand that doesn’t show wear quickly. I buy my boys a pair for the fall that look like heck by winter, then I buy them a new pair in January, and when those wear out they switch to their Natives for the late spring/summer (which wear like iron!).
Cb says
My son is hard on shoes but the Reebok black leather school shoes somehow wear like iron? He’s been wearing them from August (which makes me think, I should check if they still fit?) and they look a bit shabby but are structurally sound. And he regularly comes home covered in mud.
Anon says
I had the same experience with Skechers for my 3yos. We’ve switched back to Stride Rite as our default, because they will actually last under my kids outgrow them.
Anon says
I’ve had good luck with Under Armour sneakers holding up well.
Under Armour Unisex-Child Assert 9 Alternate Closure Running Shoe https://a.co/d/idynLli
anon says
The kids have loved their Skechers, and I’ll buy them on sale, but no, they don’t hold up very well. Better than Target shoes but not great. It is hard to find shoes that last; it’s so hit or miss, even within the same brand.
“Special time” says
How many of you are spending 1 on 1 time playing with each of your kids (“special time”, “ten minute miracle” etc.)? Every time I try to find solutions to parenting struggles, I keep coming back to this. I don’t doubt that it works, but I have 3 small kiddos. I’ve tried doing it but I find it so overwhelming. Do others do this? How do you fit it in?
Anonymous says
I take one at a time with me to do short errands. It’s much easier than dedicated playtime and very effective.
Anonymous says
Short answer: It works and I’m finding it incredibly difficult to do with three. I spend some 1 on 1 time with my oldest after my twins go to bed. DH is honestly better than I am. I spend effectively zero 1 on 1 time with my twins unless they’re sick. I noticed one of them actually seems to enjoy being sick in a weird way because he gets me all to himself for the day. And that makes me sad. I’m going to brainstorm some ways to add twin 1 on 1 time in but it’s hard.
Anon says
I don’t do anything fancy, but I do read to each of my big kids individually at bedtime (the oldest gets in bed and reads to himself and waits for me to finish with the middle). So, I get about 20+ minutes with each kid at the end of every day and it’s a good anchor. (I get plenty of time with my toddler 1:1 because toddlers need so much care!) I also try to take one along on weekend errands with me, though I grocery shop while they are at school and online shop for most else, so there’s not a ton of errands these days.
Anon says
And I’ll be totally honest: if I put away my dang phone I tend to suggest a game or an activity to one of my kids more often. I definitely find 10 min chunks to browse social media! When I get that itch I try to turn towards my kids. But I definitely don’t have anything scheduled.
DLC says
+1 to fitting in one on one time doing errands – often we’ll stop of a treat on the way. I find the 10 minute chunk harder to fit in than a larger dedicated time chunk, and playing is pretty tedious to me. It’s not so much that making the time is hard, but I find that unless I make the one on one time a big thing, the other two kids will come and want to hang out too, and I feel like in a casual setting (after school, before bedtime, etc.) it’s hard to tell the kids that this next ten minutes is only for one sibling.
My husband has also started doing one on one movie/tv nights; every so often, he and one kid will eat dinner in the basement while they watch tv, and I’ll keep the other two kids upstairs and we have dinner at the table. I’m actually kind of jealous and asked if I could have dinner and movie night with one kid too…
Anon says
What’s your schedule look like? What are their ages? Could you go on a walk around the block with one in the evenings as your husband and other kids clean up from dinner? Doesn’t have to be everyday. Or maybe one helps you make dinner as the others play. I am able to stagger nap time/quiet time in a way that I have a few minutes with each alone.
OP says
4, 2, and a baby.
Anon says
I find this nearly impossible. I have twins and solo parent often. Even if i try to take one on an errand the other wants to come too and then they both end up upset defeating half the purpose. Trying to be better about implementing at least on weekends when DH is around
anon says
We do this as part of PCIT for our ADHD kiddos, but have 2 parents and 2 kids, so I can see how it would be harder logistically with uneven numbers. What it looks like in our family is that after everyone is ready for bed (pjs, teeth brushed), we split up and each kid gets 5 minutes or undivided attention from each parent (we do parent1/kid1 and parent1/kid2 for the first 5 minutes and then swap). It’s sometimes annoying to have one more thing to do in the evening, but I remind myself that it’s actually only 10 minutes out of the day. YMMV, but my 5/6yos really thrive on this time and look forward to it, even though it’s only 5 minutes.
Anonymous says
Schedule on a daily planner that goes on the fridge. Sometimes it’s like Dad takes one kid grocery shopping while I have the other two and we rotate which kid each week. I also try to take one with me each evening when I walk the dog. 15-20 minutes matters.
Anon says
I do, but I only have two kids so they don’t outnumber me. I divide and conquer with my spouse, leverage nap time, or one kid being busy watching tv. I think I am unusual for this board in that I spend most of my time with the kids playing unless I’m doing some chore or wrangling them to do something like get dressed. I try to optimize my time with shopping online and having a cleaning service. My spouse and I also both work from home, 40 hours a week, so we aren’t spending time on commuting or being presentable for the office. That extra hour or so really matters. I used to work 9-10 hours a day and cutting off one measly hour made everything much easier.
Spirograph says
I am, but it’s not 10 minutes every day, more like aiming to have a good chunk of time with each of them at least once a week, and bedtime snuggles every night. Usually it’s just running errands or talking while shuttling just one kid to an activity. Or hanging out with one kid while waiting for another (eg I go to the farmers market with my youngest while the other two are at Saturday AM activities). I have a date night with my daughter tonight. I have to be most intentional about carving out time with my older son, because DH is a coach for his sports team so they do that together and it takes up a ton of time.
Anonymous says
I think it depends on the ages. A bike ride, neighborhood walk, play dog, art project, day trip- any or all of the above. Put the phone down and play with them.
Clementine says
I am also a big fan of taking one kid with you to do errands. I have 3- 7,3, and baby and husband’s work means I solo parent 50%.
3 loves doing dishes with me, so we do that together often. I have a double basin sink and she gets one to basically play in while I do dishes.
7 and I have ‘Snuggle Time’. After the little kids are asleep, I will watch 10 minutes of a show with him (I know, blue light, but this is what I can do right now) and let him snuggle. He always ends up talking about his day and it’s great.
I also enjoy my children much more when they’re outside. I try to get them outside after dinner and it’s fabulous.
Anon says
We can’t do it every day (I solo parent often) but we do monthly kid date nights instead. DH and I sit down at the beginning of the month and plan a no-screen date night with one parent for each kid. We try to alternate so if Kid 1 got DH last month, they’ll get time with me this month. It’s nothing fancy – the last one DH took Kid 2 to McDonalds and watched while he played in the PlayPlace. Or I’ll take someone shopping for new pants at Target and pick up Starbucks (they love the pink drink and a cake pop) while we wander around.
Anon says
I love this! I only have one kid but we should be more intentional about planning “dates” like this.
Anon says
So this could be me severely overthinking things, but I’m hoping the hive might have some clever tricks for me.
I’m attending a dinner party to night at a colleagues house. My colleague is from Europe and they’ll be serving traditional melted cheese from their home country (Raclette/fondue). But we are in the US.
I’m just a little over 8 weeks pregnant and I haven’t told any colleagues. I also have not told my toddler who will be with us.
My family was invited to this party several weeks ago, before I became pregnant.
I’m just assuming the fondue is a no-go for me. I’m assuming they put white wine in the cheese and the alcohol will not be cooked off?
I am planning on bringing a veggie tray to share and bringing some sparkling water. I really thought about just telling my colleague I’m pregnant, but I feel like that could backfire at the party if my toddler over hears anything.
I’m also hesitant to white lie that I’m on medication that should not mix with alcohol, because my co-worker’s wife is a Doctor, so I’m assuming she’d just ask what for or what type of medication.
Would a new pretend dairy intolerance be the best excuse?
Anonymous says
DH’s European family serves this regularly when we visit. There’s not a ton of wine used and it should mostly cook off. My SIL is a GP and always ate it when pregnant. Just not like tons because pregnancy constipation is not fun. We use a little wine to flavour risotto that the kids eat as well. I would just dip a little and reference too much dairy as giving you indigestion if anyone asks. You can mostly have veggies, different breads, and just dip the bread a little. It won’t be enough alcohol to be an issue. And I say this as someone who is usually ‘that poster’ about FASD and zero alcohol during pregnancy.
Anon says
“And I say this as someone who is usually ‘that poster’ about FASD and zero alcohol during pregnancy.”
Same here. The amount of wine in a normal portion of this is so negligible and it does at least partially cook off.
Anon says
I think fondue is fine while pregnant, but if you’re not into eating it I think dairy intolerance is a believable excuse. Saying you’re on antibiotics as a reason for not drinking is something pregnant women trying to hide it say.
Anonymous says
Is it raclette or fondue? Raclette is just cheese, no alcohol. Little trays of melted cheese. So good.
In general, trying to make up excuses for avoiding alcohol in food and drinks will backfire on you and attract more attention. If there is fondue with wine just eat the various dippers without fondue, and if anyone asks just say that you’re avoiding alcohol right now and move the conversation on. So many people are on antidepressants/doing Whole 30/dry whateveruary that no one should bat an eye, and if they do, they are rude.
Anon says
I would just eat it. There’s very little wine in it, and you can just nibble at it. No one is going to be noticing the quantity you consume, only whether you don’t consume it at all. Eat before you go so you’re not ravenous.
Just FYI my entire family (not medical doctors) found out I was pregnant when I accidentally ordered lobster stew and then canceled the order, saying I forgot I was on medicine that doesn’t mix with alcohol. That excuse is pretty thin and people see through it quickly if you’re a married woman of child-bearing age.
Anonymous says
My fondue recipe contains 1/2 cup wine and 1 tablespoon kirschwasser and serves about 6 people for dinner.
Spirograph says
I would be not-at-all concerned about fondue. There’s like 1/4C of alcohol in a pot of fondue, and most of it *does* cook off. If there is other food, I would just say you don’t care for any fondue tonight, thanks. I would not make up medical excuses.
This says
+1, lying and making up excuses is usually really obvious and a tell.
Vicky Austin says
I don’t see the harm in white-lying about medication; she’s not going to demand your chart for proof!
But also it does sound like you can safely partake a little bit, so maybe just make sure you pregame so you’re not starving and say you had a big lunch.
Anon says
OP – These tips are super helpful. Thanks everyone. I’ve never made fondue before so I didn’t realize the alcohol amount is probably pretty low. Google is really awful for fearmongering on this kind of thing so I appreciate the practical input. And it’s a great point that if I just say I’m avoiding alcohol for mediation I’m probably not going to be quizzed on it. I’d hope especially by co-workers.
Anon says
As several people said, I think its highly likely they’ll suspect if you say something about avoiding alcohol because of medication. Hopefully they’ll be too polite to say anything, but if you genuinely don’t want people to know, that’s not the best way to go about this.
Anon says
Following up on the above – why do they make so many little kids sandals that are open toed. Am i the only parent who prefers closed toe and ideally closed heel for their kids?
Anon says
+1 to this. My kid runs like crazy on sidewalk. I always worry she’ll trip and rip up her toes with open toed sandals. I feel like I’m always weeding through the target options to find the 1 or 2 closed toed options.
Anon says
Our daycares and some summer camps always required closed-toe shoes, too.
Anonymous says
This is why we always get Keens or fisherman style sandals.
anon says
My youngest kid is 8 and I still feel this way. I want some foot protection on the playground, ffs!
Anon says
I hate mostly closed sandals like Keens – so difficult to get rocks and mulch out.
Kindergarten Drama Question says
My kindergartener got off the bus, told me I was making the worse day ever even worse and stomped the whole quarter mile home yesterday 20 yards ahead of me (clearly something was up as this is not usual for her). After giving her 10 minutes to cool down, I sat on the floor with her and asked if we could talk about what’s going on. She did her usual non-responsive thing and then picked up an old puppet that happened to be lying around, and introduced him to me. I decided to humor her for a few minutes then go back to my questioning, but then “Grover” started telling me all about what happened at school today. As long as I didn’t look at or address kiddo, Grover answered all my questions. I don’t know if they have been watching conflict management videos in their guidance sessions, as I didn’t think this happened in real life, but I am glad I exercised my patience and leaned into it.
Turns out she and a girl in her class with whom she runs hot and cold, call her A, (and who, at least based on the side of the story I have heard is exercising her emotional manipulation skills as well as doing a bit of bullying (pinching, pushing) with my independent introverted kiddo who desperately wants to be liked) got into a tiff at recess, A told assistant teacher (main was out) my kid needed to go to the principal (which upset my rule follower a lot) and the assistant teacher made my kid sit out the rest of recess because she wasn’t playing with A. In reality, based on how it was described to me, I think my kid (who started the year as a loner and finally seems to be interacting with other kids on the playground) was playing with other kids and they likely were being rude and excluding A (as far as I am aware there isn’t a rule that kids have to play with each other), and so that’s why my kid got punished.
We had a chat about how it’s not OK to exclude people from the group, and if she didn’t want to play with A then she should have let A play with the other friends and gone and done something else herself. For the rest of this kindergarten drama, other than talking with her about using her words in response to the physical actions and stepping away to get out of reach, responding with questions when she is the excluded one, and asking for help from a grown-up if the problem persists, is there something else I should be doing? I hadn’t yet sent a note to the teacher because it seems like regular kids figuring out how to interact socially with each other, but now that it’s resulting in privileges being removed (and sitting out recess is a BIG deal to my kid, that’s always what she tells me is the best part of school), should I? I’m inclined to see if it happens again, especially because it happened on a day her main, experienced teacher was out, but would appreciate the gut check.
Anonymous says
I would send a short note to the main teacher. something like: “Just wanted to share with you that Suzy was rather upset when she came home today. She said that she was not allowed to participate in recess play as assistant teacher was told by another student that Suzy was excluding her. Suzy has been a bit cautious around playing with this child due to past incidents of pushing and pinching. I’ve reminded her to avoid excluding others and encouraged her to speak to her teachers if anyone hurts her. I’d appreciate if you could keep on this dynamic to the extent possible as Suzy otherwise loves school so much. “
Anon says
I would wait. It’s okay for the school to enforce consequences, even if they aren’t ideal/seem overkill from a parent perspective. My son still goes on about having to sit at the “in trouble” lunch table when he got blamed for another kid throwing food. I empathized with him big time, and told him even adults make mistakes, and maybe it was a stressful lunch time for the monitor.
If it becomes a pattern, then I’d absolutely reach out and see what feedback the teacher has. But this does sound like normal kid stuff, and a bit of an overbearing recess monitor. Kids have to learn to interact with a variety of authority styles and I tend to bank my goodwill for bigger issues.
TheElms says
I would probably send the note. I was your daughter as a kid and it was so hard; I wish my parents had done something / anything to back me up on occasions like this. The experiences which weren’t frequent were still enough to sour me on interacting/playing with other kids until at least high school and at that point it took a lot of effort to figure out social interactions with peers. I’m not saying you need to send a note every time, but your kid needs to know that you believe them and you’ll go to bat for them, when it matters to them.
Anon says
But what are you going to bat for? “Since you don’t like the consequences I’ll ask that the teacher give you a pass in the future”? It doesn’t sound like the child was blamed for something she didn’t do. Continually stepping in to fight small battles for kids communicates that you don’t believe they can handle things; empathizing with them and helping them come up with a plan is how to build resilience.
If the daughter was really being treated unfairly, or kids were bullying her, absolutely step in.
Anonymous says
The age matters here. These are younger kids who are still figuring out social interactions and not far out from preschool/daycare years where social interactions are more closely supervised and guided.
And OP’s kid has been pushed and pinched but had not disclosed until now. Teacher is likely not aware either. Teachers can’t have eyes everywhere at once so it’s useful for them to know some of the different dynamics so they can facilitate positive interactions.
Anonymous says
I would send a note but keep it short- I have been hearing from Suzy that she and another girl are having some drama at school. Have you noticed this in the classroom? Is there anything you would suggest we do at home?
See how the teacher responds.
Anon says
2 years into parenting and sick day guilt hasn’t gotten any easier. I’m very thankful for my husband and mother in law for caring for my sick baby today so I can work without interruption, but also am sad I’m not the one caring for her.
NLD in NYC says
Hugs from an internet stranger. DS is being cared by people that love her; where is it written that it needs to be you? Besides, she won’t remember this lol.
Vicky Austin says
I think I saw AwayEmily post this once, not sure, but it stuck with me as I navigated daycare for my imminent baby in a family that usually has SAHMs. “The more loving and engaged adults in my child’s life, the better.” Hope you and your LO both feel better soon!