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This sweater dress from Target is available up to size 4X and is $40.
Looking for other washable workwear? See all of our recent recommendations for washable clothes for work, or check out our roundup of the best brands for washable workwear.
Sales of note for 12.5.23…
(See all of the latest workwear sales at Corporette!)
- Nordstrom – Holiday sale up to 50% off; 5x the points on beauty for a limited time
- Ann Taylor – 40% off your purchase & extra 15% off sweaters
- Banana Republic – Up to 40% off select styles; up to 40% off sale styles
- Banana Republic Factory – 50% off everything & extra 20% off purchase
- Eloquii – Extra 60% off all sale
- J.Crew – 40% off your purchase with code
- Lands’ End – Up to 70% off everything; free shipping (readers love the cashmere)
- Loft – 50% off your purchase with code (ends 12/5)
- Summersalt – Up to 60% off select styles & free scarf with orders $125+ (this reader-favorite sweater blazer is down to $75)
- Talbots – 40% off your regular-price purchase; extra 50% off all markdowns
- Zappos – 34,000+ women’s sale items! Check out these reader-favorite workwear brands on sale, and some of our favorite kid shoe brands on sale.
Kid/Family Sales
- Crate&kids – Free shipping sitewide; up to 50% off toy + gift event; free monogramming for a limited time only (order by 12/15)
- J.Crew Crewcuts – 40% off your purchase with code
- Pottery Barn Kids – Up to 50% off toys, furniture & gifts
- Graco – Holiday savings up to 35% off; sign up for texts for 20% off full-price item
- Walmart – Up to 25% off top baby gifts; big savings on Delta, Graco, VTech, Fisher-Price & more
anon says
Solidarity to all of those who survived post-Halloween-morn with their overtired, overstimulated, over sugared kids. It wasn’t without its bumps, but they’re now at school. Win.
AwayEmily says
Totally. This morning I told mine to please be extra nice to your teachers today — today’s going to be a rough one for them.
Anon says
Both my kids have field trips today, one involving a bunch of 10 year-olds going a 2.5 hour bus ride away. I really have to wonder who thought that was a good idea for scheduling.
(My son insisted several times that he plans to use the bus ride to sleep.)
anon says
My 10 yo has an overnight field trip tonight–his first ever. I can’t figure out who thought that was a good idea. May the force be with those teachers.
Anon says
Mine has a field trip today too.
Anon says
I chaperoned a field trip this morning and the kids were actually surprisingly calm! It snowed yesterday evening though, so I think a lot of kids didn’t last as long at trick or treating as they might have otherwise.
More Sleep Would Be Nice says
Our neighbor’s daughter (1st grade) has one today, too! I guess MAYBE it makes sense, because they know it is a wash of a morning?
Anon says
This morning my three year old asked if it was still Halloween. When he found out it wasn’t, he asked when the next holiday was. We told him Thanksgiving, and he asked if Thanksgiving was today. It was so sad (and funny) to see his disappointment that holidays don’t happen daily.
Anonymous says
We’re in a neighborhood that has block parties, complete with bouncy houses. After the first one post-covid my then-3yo checked every morning for a week to see if there was a bouncy house on the street.
Anonymous says
Our neighbors regularly hang out in their driveways (we’re on a cul de sac) on nice weekend evenings in the summer. My now 3-year-old looks for “parties” every weekend starting at 9 am and has been since she was about 1 and a half.
Anono says
3yo woke up very grouchy and then very lethargic. We dozed on the couch and showed up later than normal to preschool. All the kids looked pretty tired and his teacher was totally zoned out and not her super friendly self.
Hopefully they all have a nice long naptime
Cb says
T’s bestie oversold the party they were having at their house, which was just really a drop-in and say hello, have a cupcake and T was so disappointed it wasn’t like a spooky birthday parties. Declared it the “worst party ever” en route home but by the time we walked all the way home, we’d talked about expections and he’d upped it to “mediocre”.
But his costume was the best. My mom made this intricate, fully upcycled viking outfit and he was cool and cozy.
DLC says
Through a fluke of school system scheduling my kids have the day off today. I can’t decide if this is a good thing or not. In the one hand, they were able to stay up late last night and sleep in this morning. On the other hand, another random middle of the week day off that needs child care coverage….
Spirograph says
Our district has a day off too. It’s technically an end-of-term grading day for teachers, but well timed! I’m thankful the aftercare program has full-day coverage, and it was nice to enjoy Halloween (we also live in a block party neighborhood) without worrying to much about school night bedtime.
CCLA says
Ours had this last year, I think it was a teacher training day or something similar. I thought if they’re going to have this random day off anyway, brilliant to make it post-Halloween and wished they had the same this year so they could sleep in and we didn’t have to keep as much of an eye on the bedtime clock. Alas, looks like it was a fluke, since this year they have 11/6 off for the same reason.
Anon says
i wish we had a day off. my kids were GRUMPY getting up this morning and i’m sure the time between school and bedtime is going to be miserable
Anon says
I can see the upside to being able to sleep in on Nov. 1, but personally I’d hate to have a random Wednesday off. All our teacher workdays are Mondays or Fridays, which I prefer (long weekend to travel if you want, easier to have a relative visit to help, etc.)
Anonymous says
First time trick or treating with our ASD kid, and it went great! He was very into it. A complete 180 over last year. I think it helped that they’ve been practicing in OT for a few weeks now and hyping it up.
Anon says
<3
Anon says
that’s wonderful! i like when people share good news
Baby name help says
I’m getting stuck in my own head and need a bunch of smart readers to help. I’m expecting baby girl in a few weeks, and am still struggling over the name. The far front runner is the name Clare – spelled that way specifically because we are Irish (its the name of a county) and Catholic. We don’t feel any particular affinity for the much more common spelling Claire, aside from the fact that it sounds the same. Some days I love Clare, and other days I feel like we’re going to be saddling Baby with “too plain” of a name or the “ugly” spelling. I don’t care as much about the risk of misspelling which I know will be high, but more the perceptions of the name itself. What’s making it harder is that choosing our older kids’ names was easy – for both we agreed early and never doubted it. We’ve had a lot more trouble finding one for this baby. Clare and the sibling names do sound good together.
So I guess, two questions: 1) have any other parents had name hesitation and then just went for it when the baby came? how did it turn out? and 2) are my concerns about what people naturally think about the name Clare founded?
Anon says
Clare is beautiful and classic, and I wouln’t worry about the alternate spelling. Name choices are hard – if anything going with a fairly traditional name is your lowest risk option!
anon says
As someone who’s name is always misspelled because of a popular name with a close spelling, I wouldn’t do that to a kid. It’s infuriating to have your name misspelled your entire life. I’ve had to correct driver’s licenses, college diplomas, airplane tickets, awards at work, published articles in journals, and on and on. It’s also often in my email address (chosen by employers), so I often don’t get important emails. Even my own grandmother never got it right so I have engraved birthday presents from her with the wrong name. It’s continually a huge pain, both emotionally and practically.
Anon says
We have a Cecelia. Cecilia is the more common spelling but we chose Cecelia for a few reasons.
At first it was a simple choice. Then I agonized for longer than I want to admit about the spelling.
I think Clare is great. I think that – like my daughter – she will have to spell her name but also it’ll be fine.
NYCer says
+1. I also have a name that can be spelled multiple ways, and it is totally fine. Do people spell it wrong sometimes? Yes. Do I reallllly care? Not particularly. Apparently this does bother some people as evidenced by other posts, but I don’t think it is that big of a deal.
I think Clare is a nice, classic name. I wouldn’t classify it as boring. Go with what you lieke!
Anon says
Dude, as a Katherine who goes by Kate, married to a Michael, you will always have to spell even the most common of names :) pick what you like!
Katie says
I’m a Katie and once had a teenaged barista comment on how she’d never seen it spelled that way before 🤔
Anon says
I’m sorry, what now!?! That’s cray.
Anon says
My husband’s cousin’s name is Clare. She is in her early thirties and comes from a wealthy family in the Midwest. Not sure if any of those details matter. I think it’s a lovely name and I don’t ever see anyone mistakenly putting an i in her name, though I haven’t known her that long.
Mary Moo Cow says
I can’t speak to (1) but (2), I love the name! FWIW, we are friends with an Irish immigrant family who have given their American-born kids traditional Irish names, and a Swedish immigrant family who gave all their kids (Swedish and American born, respectively) traditional Swedish names. I think it is such a lovely thing to do! Maybe I’m also biased because I’m fond of Ireland, but I think Clare is not unheard of and not that common, not plain, and not an ugly spelling!
Anonymous says
Omg just name your baby Clare. It’s not a weird or ugly spelling. It’s a nice normal name.
Anon says
Clare is lovely. I have a cousin with that spelling, also Irish.
And yes, two of my kids have names that I was not totally sold on, and they grew to fit them and I love their names now. I have three boys, and while I have a long list of girl names, I only had one clear boy name winner, so the others felt a bit like settling (and boy number three didn’t have a name for a day because I just couldn’t decide between two).
Anon says
It’s a beautiful name and I wouldn’t spend one more moment worried about the type of people who wouldn’t like it.
anon says
My niece is Claire and I love it. We / they are very, very Irish but they opted for the more “American traditional” spelling. Have to admit, never asked why, but the name itself is beautiful. She’s 6, in first grade and no thoughts about it being “too plain”. I have a name I don’t love so I’m silently critical of a lot of names and Clare/Claire is not one of them!
Emma says
I like Clare! I don’t think of it as lesser or uglier than Claire. I do think she’ll have to spell it out a lot, but that’s fine. I also have a name I need to spell out (nope Emma isn’t my real name) and it’s a little annoying at Starbucks or whatever, but generally not the biggest deal. Name the baby what you want, Clare isn’t one of those weirdo names that make people think “oh the poor kid what is wrong with the parents”. To answer your second question, we had a shortlist of two names for our girl, although I found we leaned towards one more throughout the pregnancy. When she was born it felt pretty clear to us that was the right name all along. I think late pregnancy can cause anxiety and your doubts about the name may be a symptom of that – it’s easier to give a definitive name when you’re holding a healthy newborn.
Anonymous says
I think you should name her what you want, and spell it how you like. This is the first of a million parenting things that people will have Opinions[tm] about, but it’s really no one’s business but yours.
OP says
Ok, thank you all! I knew I was overthinking this. Love hearing about the Clare/Claire’s in your lives too!
Anonie says
I don’t think of Clare as any more ugly or plain than Claire. One of my relatives named her baby Clare (for the same reasons – Catholic), and I’ve never heard her comment that she has any regrets.
I wouldn’t say I had name hesitation, but I definitely did a lot of Googling around one of my kids’ names. There’s one pop culture reference of her nickname that I’m not a huge fan of (think Lizzie = Lizzie McGuire, but not that specifically), and I was wondering if other people would associate it too closely with her. It has never been an issue, and I absolutely love her name, it is so her. I also like having a somewhat unique name – every time I meed another “Lizzie”, I get extremely excited and ask, how old is she, why did you choose the name, etc. Bottom line, I say go for it!
Anonymous says
I have a Claire. We sometimes get asked which way she spells it (Clare vs Claire), but we are in Boston where people do both.
Regardless of how you spell it, it’s a great name that “yells” well. Ask me how I know ;).
Spirograph says
This comment made me smile!
I also like the name Clare or Claire. I personally have never seen the Clare spelling in the wild, but your reasoning is lovely and no one else will give it a second thought other than to apologize for a misspelling.
anon says
“Yell-ability” was a definite factor in our naming both our kids. DH used to yell the names, first + middle, across the house to see how it flowed. They’re still quite young so haven’t had to truly test it but I see this test being critical for the teenaged years.
Anonymous says
I’m a Kathryn who went to grade school with Katherines, Catherines, and one Catheryn (very Catholic area). I knew a couple Clares. We all figured it out. :)
Anonymous says
I love Clare! My grandmother is Mary Clare, and my cousin Clare is named after her. The connection to your roots is more important than what other people think. Your daughter will love visiting the county someday!
If you’re concerned about it being too simple, you could always pick a middle name or something like Mary Clare that can be used together or as a nickname like M.C.
anon says
Well — I have a Claire and absolutely love the name, no regrets. I see Claire/Clare as a great name for a strong, independent woman and don’t consider it THAT plain.
Anon for This says
Gut check. After a lot of ‘he’s such a bright kid but is easily distracted’ messages from the teacher, I think I’m walking down the road of getting my kid an official adhd diagnosis and I guess medication?
I’Ve already adjusted my parenting, removed tech, increased one on one time, removed food dyes, and increased exercise/outdoor time. I’ve taken away more privileges and the behaviors aren’t crazy or out of the norm – blurting out answers, not raising his hand, needing directions repeated (specifically for things he finds boring’.
I feel like a failure but also… I myself have an appointment because I’m fairly sure I have ADHD. And I know it’s highly genetic. I’m just… I’m so ashamed and keep feeling like this is all my fault.
Boston Legal Eagle says
It’s not a failure to be neurodiverse. How boring would this world be if we were all rule obeying robots (not too mention there would be major societal changes that wouldn’t happen because no one broke the rules)? The default way school is set up is not for everyone, and different people need different tools to succeed. I think someone here said we are all on a range/spectrum of characteristics, so we all may have some distractedness or anxiety or otherwise. Being diagnosed with ADHD or anxiety doesn’t mean you’re so totally different from everyone else, it just might mean that it’s impacting your life a bit more and you need more tools.
AwayEmily says
Yes, THIS! It is not a failure at all — kids are built differently, and with the right tools he will have an awesome life. Not that you need success stories but my close friend with ADHD started taking meds in the 2000s when they were first prescribed and they were life-changing for her. She now lives abroad with her husband and toddler girl and is does amazing work in finance in developing countries. She still has ADHD, she still struggles with it (meds are not a panacea), but it’s just one tiny part of her fulfilling, joyful life. Just like it will be for your son.
anonM says
+1. And it doesn’t necessarily mean medication will be what you ultimately decide is needed.
Some signs of ADHD in kids (not sure on adults) are blaming self for problems, feels guilty, is self conscious, feels unloved, unhappy, etc. (We are getting DS tested next week.) I’m glad you have an appointment for yourself. If you and kiddo do have ADHD, you working to resolve your underlying guilt will help you both. You certainly wouldn’t want your kid feeling guilty for having ADHD, so give yourself some grace too.
Spirograph says
These symptoms absolutely persist to adulthood.
Anonymous says
It’s not a failure to have ADHD and you’re much better off getting a diagnosis and really treating it than driving yourself crazy trying to remove food dye from your life.
Waffles says
I don’t know how old your son is, but expectations differ not only by age, but also by culture. My kid briefly went to a non-American school and was screamed at daily until we put her back into an American school. She is an absolute joy to teach, according to the American teachers. I wouldn’t be surprised, however, if the non-American teacher thought she was destined for prison.
This is all to say, is the teacher or the school very strict? We can’t all thrive everywhere with everyone.
I think it’s a gift to share your differences with your children. Then they have someone who can empathize with them and advocate for them in a way no one else can, because you truly know what they are going through, as you’ve been through it yourself.
Best of luck to you and your family — it’s okay to be different, and it’s nice to be different together.
Anon says
Yeah, there is definitely no shame in having ADHD or needing meds, but I think a lot of times the problem is that our expectations for kid behavior are out of whack with typical development. What you’ve described sounds pretty normal, particularly for a kid under the age of 8 or so.
OP says
So that’s what I’m struggling with!! I think he’s probably me: intelligent, a little anxious, wants to please, willing to work very hard, and a brain moving at supersonic speed.
I keep feeling like maybe if I had him in a forest school or maybe if I didn’t work so much or maybe if dad was around more that he wouldn’t need a label…
But I also don’t want him to get labeled as a problem or develop self esteem issues… so I’m just struggling.
anonM says
OP, you sound so much like my DH who has ADHD and has/is struggling with our son having a lot of signs for ADHD, down to fears of labeling! But, for better or worse the behavior problems have gotten so bad we really HAD to take more actions. What we both learned quickly is our son IS getting labeled right now, but as a bad a kid instead of a kid that needs extra help. He is not getting what he needs. If we need a label to get the education plan he needs, I no longer am worried about the label nor is he. Truly, so much has changed in the past 20 years – there are 504 plans, IEPs, etc. and at least our experience so far has been such a relief — not the stereotype we feared at all. Please, talk to the teacher about a 504 plan as a first step. When we did, the teacher was obviously relieved. I feel you on the forest school thing, but please, you’re beating yourself up so much and sounds like your kiddo just may need some extra supports. This isn’t your fault, or about dad’s involvement. Internet hugs, you are definitely not alone, and I’ll try to post again when I have more helpful info on our adhd/504 journey.
Anonymous says
I think you should work on your own views, because you really don’t want your kid to feel ashamed for having a brain that works the way it does. I would also reconsider taking away privileges for fairly normal behavior. Don’t punish him because he has poor impulse control and executive function and literally can’t fully focus on boring instructions – instead, reward him when he succeeds.
Spirograph says
yes and no to your last couple sentences. The big thing about ADHD is that people need quick “point-of-performance” feedback and consequences. It’s pretty ineffective, for example, to take away or threaten to take away privileges at home because of something that happened at school. ADHD kids don’t have the capacity to consider future consequences of their actions, that’s part of the challenge. But if an ADHD kid throws a toy in frustration and immediately loses the privilege to play with that toy, that may get through.
OP, If the teacher is open to brainstorming solutions on managing his behavior in the classroom, a points + reward system helped my son when he was in early elementary.
OP says
So here’s the thing… I’ve tried both. And we’ve landed on heavy praise/positives for the good and losing electronics for the bad. Kid is 100% able to associate actions with consequences and again – it’s not major behavioral stuff… more like ‘kid is super smart but can’t remember to raise his hand/keeps chatting during lessons.’
I also have already done a lot of the systems/supports recommended… I think that’s why he’s doing okay.
Spirograph says
It’s not about associating actions with consequences, it’s about the ability to think, “if I do X, it will lead to Y” in real time so that they can make a better decision about their behavior in that moment. ADHD kids struggle with making that calculation in advance, they just react. If they can’t control an impulse and know that a consequence will be associated, that’s where the negative self-talk & guilt come in knowing that they made a bad choice and waiting for the other shoe to drop.
I want to be really clear that you’re doing great, and I agree with others above that your son’s behavior sounds developmentally appropriate even for a neurotypical child in early elementary school. But if ADHD *is* in the mix, the timing of feedback and consequences is very important.
Anonymous says
Agreed, I was that kid. All the punishments didn’t make me remember to raise my hand. What did work was teaching me ways to release the impulse in less distracting ways like saying it under my breath or writing it down and rewarding me when I was successful at that in small ways. In particular, the teacher would let me know when she’d noticed me doing it and that was enough of a reward form me.
Quick feedback is best, but I do believe that reward is better when possible as long as the behavior isn’t too extreme.
Anon says
I resigned from work a few weeks ago. It’s my first time not working aside from maternity leave. Any suggestions from moms who have taken a break and returned to the workforce? I don’t know how long this break is going to be.
Right now I don’t have the bandwidth to be consulting on the side or being involved in the local bar association, but would appreciate tips on small action items to take to remain up to date? FWIW I’m a litigator.
Anonymous says
I am not a litigator so take this with a grain of salt. I was so burned out: for almost a year I just acted like my job was being a SAHM. I cleaned the house. I ran errands. I hung out with my kids. That what’s what I needed to do: YMMV. After about 9 months I started job hunting again. I brushed up my resume, got back on LinkedIn, and set a goal to apply to two jobs per week. It took me over a year to find a job, but now I work from home part time and it’s amazing. If I had it to do over again, I probably would have joined some sort of network.
TheElms says
Does your prior firm or your bar association offer free/ low cost CLEs? I suspect you have to do a small number to keep your license unless you go inactive. So those plus perhaps a few more on topics of interest could help you keep up to date. Additionally, you could sign up for client alerts from your former firm (or just set aside some time once a week to read the latest from a few big firms or firms that are active in your areas of practice).
Anon says
Halloween vent. Going out on Halloween is always a fraught situation for me becuase I always encounter groups of families/moms I know out trick or treating together, sometimes with coordinated costumes etc and we never get invited to do stuff like that/would have no one to invite. My son was talking to a kid in his class this morning who brought up going to a fellow classmate’s house to give out candy – my son was not invited. He didn’t seem bothered but it stung me. It’s like I know that other parents/famillies have more friends/family community than I do, but it’s not usually in my face. seeing it all on display on Halloween just stings every year.
Anon says
I’ve been there!! But honestly, the best solution here is to invite someone. It doesn’t have to be someone you know well – if your kid has a friend at school or from an activity, ask them if they want to join you on Halloween. It’s not the Homecoming dance where you can only have one date; most people are happy to add an additional friend to the group on Halloween night. We trick or treated with a friend and neighbor last night, and would have said yes to any classmate or friend who asked to join us. I get that it can be hard to initiate, I really do, but the best way to not feel left out of things is to ask people to do stuff with you.
FVNC says
“Would have said yes to any classmate or friend…”
Yes to this! My 10 year old inadvertently invited herself to a friend’s house, and I was a bit mortified when I texted the mom for details and it became clear that my daughter wasn’t part of the original plan (nothing malicious, just wasn’t part of whatever discussions had happened at school). ANYway, the other parent was so sweet and happy to have her join, and even brought her back home afterward. The kids all had a blast. I’m still recovering from my horror at breaching etiquet te (only sort of joking; the southern cotillion immersion is tough to shake :), but I’m glad my daughter got to spend the night with friends.
Anon says
I love that! I’m glad the other mom was inclusive and she had a great night!
Anonymous says
Same! My daughter and her friend had coordinating costumes. Their friend asked to join them pretty last minute (she was planning to go as a paired costume with another friend, who bailed). They were like HECK YA and asked if she wanted to wear her own costume or be part of the group.
Mario and Luigi and Peach had a great time.
Anonymous says
Hugs. This is me/our family too.
Anonymous says
Where I live this is a working mom problem. The handful of working moms are left out because the SAHMs all met and bonded in MOPS. They volunteer at school together during the day and hang out at the pool with their kids all summer. The moms are all besties and the kids are just along for the ride. I am friends with a few of these moms individually but will never be part of the group, and will never be as close to any of them as they are to each other because they don’t need any more good friends and don’t have time for one.
Anon says
Why don’t you befriend the other working moms?
Anon says
I’m not sure how old your child is, but with young kids trick or treating with friends is often more about geographic proximity than bestie status. We had no one to go with for years, but I didn’t take it too personally, because daycare friends lived far away and our section of the neighborhood is weirdly childless. Now my kid is in elementary school and we know more neighbors so we usually have someone to go with, but they’re not our besties (for either kids or adults), just people who are geographically close. And if you see people you know while out and about, why don’t you join them? That happened to us a couple times before we had official plans.
Anonymous says
I need a gut check. We got a letter from school saying our first grader is reading below grade level. This is not a shock, but I’m torn on whether we need to take drastic action, and what that would even look like. At his teacher conference a few weeks ago, she said he doesn’t quite recognize that letters make sounds, but she’s not worried and he will get there. When I asked what we should be doing at home, she said continue reading to him and having him read to me. He can kind of sound out words, but mostly memorizes short books and then recites them to me. I’ll reach out to her again and ask what we could do. Any suggestions for those of you who have been through this? I suppose I could hire a reading tutor. I think he’s smart but doesn’t like to do hard things. I truly think it hasn’t “clicked” for him yet, but also don’t want him to be behind for his entire education. Am I borrowing trouble?
Anonymous says
Is it a form letter that automatically goes out? If the teacher isn’t concerned I wouldn’t be either. Our kids both have to do assessments and came up on “below grade level” on several things, but both teachers were like, this is fine, it’s the beginning of the year so we’re of course still getting them to grade level, we’re just getting a baseline to know where everyone is. We go to the library a lot and let our kids pick out whatever books they want, maybe try getting that into your routine so he gets more and longer books, but I wouldn’t jump to reading tutor right away.
OP says
It is the form letter. Thanks for the reassurance!
Anonymous says
Is the school using phonics? We had great results at home with the Hooked on Phonics kits.
anon says
The just keep reading to him advice is really antiquated Lucy Caulkin’s advice. It’s been shown that most kids need explicit instruction in phonics. If they aren’t explicitly teaching phonics at school, he’s not going to catch up without outside instruction. (Listen to the NYT Sold a Story podcast for the backstory.)
If he’s not sounding out yet, I’d try using How to Teach your Child to Read in 100 Easy lessons. It has a script for sounding out words and introduces phonetic sounds in a systematic way. Doing a lesson every day creates a lot of consistency that can actually be better than a tutor. If you start the book and he isn’t able to do it, then I’d get a tutor with experience in LD to work with him at least 2x a week, as something is likely up.
I do think you need to take action. By 2nd grade, they expect kids to be working on reading to learn and that’s hard to do if you cannot read fluently.
Anon says
Phonics is the key. Our kindergarten did phonics twice a week with a dedicated teacher and that made it click for us. I have relatives in other states and my very bright nieces and nephews were struggling in first grade because they didn’t get any phonics instruction in K.
EP-er says
+1 to all of this! Sold a Story was fascinating and tracked with my kids’ experiences. Please do check out a phonics-based supplement for at home. We used the 100 Easy Lessons book, also, and it made a lot of things click for my youngest.
TheElms says
I don’t know if you need to do anything if he is getting phonics instruction at school and his teacher is not concerned. But if you do want to do something there is an app called Reading.com that is pretty good. It is one less than 15 minute lesson a day and focuses on letter sounds and is somewhat interactive and ahas a few games in addition to the lessons. By about 12 lessons (so 2 weeks, but you could always do more than 1 lesson a day) you are sounding out short cvc words.
Cb says
I think you can think about opportunities to work on it, but also, my 1st grader went from sounding out every word to reading basically fluently in 4 weeks at the start of term? So I’d watch and see until winter break.
I’m a total phonics proponents but we did do a bunch of sightword flashcards which I think just sped up the reading process (b/c he could recognise 20% of words or so) and then felt happier, more confident, like it was less of a slog.
AwayEmily says
This happened to us, too. Caveat we are at a phonics school so I wasn’t too worried, but something clicked for mine halfway through first grade.
Cb says
It was wild! We were a bit worried, and he’s gone up 3 levels since school started in August and will be onto chapter books by Christmas. I suspect he was bored with the easy books and his new teacher noticed that, but it’s made a huge improvement.
We still struggle with his oral comprehension far outpacing his reading ability so he finds most books for his reading age boring, but he’s getting there.
Anonymous says
Yes, the big question is whether (and how) the school is teaching phonics.
anon says
Even if reading might click on its own, spending 10-15 minutes a day with a 1st grader working 1:1 on reading (using phonics) can only help, especially for a kid who hasn’t caught on to however they have been teaching reading at school. It hasn’t clicked yet, and that may be because of how they are teaching reading.
We did HTTYCTR before bed every night, followed by us reading a chapter book to him. It wasn’t hard and made a huge difference.
Anonymous says
Hmmm. What is the school doing? Ours has things like a reading specialist, who would be assigned to work with kids like yours.
How did he do in K? Was he behind then?
Anonymous says
Thanks all! He and I did Teach Your Child To Read over the summer. He did NOT get it. I’ll pick that back up and get him on reading dot com. The teacher is “secretly” teaching phonics because it’s not part of the school’s official curriculum but she knows it’s important. I guess I should say she is supplementing but I’m pretty salty about the whole situation. He got zero phonics instruction in kinder. And this is a “good” school.
anon says
There’s no way I would rely on “secret” phonics instruction to teach my child to read.
I’m really surprised that you’re aware of this issue, but omitted this context from your post. Talk about burying the lede.
Anonymous says
Yeah the school is the problem, not your kid. Supplement at home, but I would personally get involved at the school board level.
Anon says
My son was behind in first, but is reading at a 5th grade level in 2nd grade, so I usually take these assessments with a metric ton of salt. That said, I would hire a tutor with a solid knowledge of phonics if your school isn’t teaching them. My bias is that I have a really hard time getting my own kids to do something that a third party can get them to do easily, and reading is important enough to hire someone with actual expertise in how best to work with struggling readers. Also, dyslexia “hides” frequently in smart kids – my bestie missed her daughter’s diagnosis until 4th grade.
Anon says
If your first grader did not get “how to teach your kid to read in 100 lessons” then it’s time for a tutor.
If your kid was 4 I would say hey wait a few months and try again. At age 6 it should have clicked and sometimes it’s simply the fact that our kids learn better from others.
Anon says
I really disagree that it “should have clicked” by the fall of first grade. It did not click for me until well into first grade, and I know many people with kids in the same boat.
Anon says
I only say that it should of clicked because it sounds like they sat and did the curriculum “how to teach your kid to read in 100 easy lessons” and it still didn’t click. That is what raises my concern. If you are familiar with that curriculum then you might also be concerned that it didn’t click for a 6 year old.
NotAnon says
It didn’t click with that specific curriculum being used?
anon says
We all need to move past the erroneous idea that if you keep reading to kids that reading will eventually “click” and they’ll become readers once they’re ready. Reading is a skill that can be taught using phonics. Some kids do figure it out on their own, but most need explicit reading instruction.
The comments here aren’t that OP’s son is woefully behind, but that now is the time to be working on reading. Kids learn to read during 1st grade (as you agree) and OP’s son attends a school that isn’t teaching kids how to read.
The How to Teach book methodically teaches how to sound out basic CVC words. If OP went through the first portion of the book and her son still doesn’t understand the concept of sounding out, then something may be up and it’s worth finding additional help.
Anon says
I’m the one who said the thing about the click, and it’s definitely not mutually exclusive with reading instruction. You need to teach kids how to read, but even with teaching, you typically still have to wait for it to click at some point and the kid goes from barely reading to reading fluently very quickly. From what I’ve seen, anywhere from 5 to 7 is a very normal age for that “click” to happen so I wouldn’t be very worried about a 6 year old who hasn’t gotten there yet.
Anon says
No one is expecting him to be a fluent reader, as they can take a while to click. But a mid-year 1st grader should be working on sounding out CVC words. It sounds like OP’s son isn’t doing that, even after instruction on how to do it last summer. That is concerning.
Hair Troubles says
My two year old daughter has been twisting and twirling her hair into a huge rat’s nest overnight. Is there a good product or method to keep it from getting into snarls that take ten minutes to comb out? She has sensitive skin, so I’m reluctant to put anything in that will leave a residue on her scalp or may get rubbed into her eyes. We bath her every night (at dr’s rec because of the skin stuff) using the Eucerin all in one wash, although her hair only gets washed every other night or so.
AwayEmily says
My kid was a hair-twirler and several times we had to actually cut out the tangles. Can you find something else for her to fidget with at night? Or give her a little quarter-ponytail and she can just twirl that? (that’s what ended up working for my kid)
Anon says
We’ve had to cut tangles out of my hair-twirler’s hair too.
Anon says
It’s not clear to me if she’s actively twisting it (like with her fingers) or if the act of tossing and turning in her sleep is causing her hair to twist itself into a rat’s nest against her pillow.
Hair Troubles says
She’s twisting it with her fingers, and almost exclusively at bedtime and overnight. I can keep it mostly decent until she goes to bed, but if she’s at it while she’s in bed I can’t stop her. I might try braiding it tonight and seeing how that goes.
Anon says
My son does this. Conditioner helps, bother after shampooing and when there’s a big matted section.
Anonymous says
Shampoo and lots of conditioner at start of bath. Comb out with wide tooth comb while conditioner is still in at end of bath. Rinse.
If possible, braid her hair before bed and show her that she can twirl the braid. Gives the twirling feeling that she may use to self soothe but doesn’t tangle.
Anon. says
Would she sleep in a silk bonnet? No personal experience, but that was my first thought.
More Sleep Would Be Nice says
Your friend here is a protective hair style: a braid, pineapple, etc.
Anonymous says
Tangle teezer hairbrush, and something other than her hair to twirl, like a short very silky ribbon/stuffie.