Accessory Tuesday: The Leather Wallet

Does anyone have recommendations for totally opaque full-length maternity leggings, ideally cotton or cotton-y rather than a shiny workout fabric? If you know of something in tall sizes I will be in your debt forever.

Recommendations for chapter books at a similar level to Princess in Black for a new reader who is intimidated by books without copious illustrations? Should I be looking at Mercy Watson? Magic Treehouse?

Maternity clothes help, please!
Any good links for maternity fleece-lined leggings?
Also any good underwear that don’t have VPL? Last preganancy I wore ultra low rise, but this time I’m wanting something more shaped like the ants-in-the-pants game.

At what point do you let your kid quit an activity, particularly one that he’s actually good at and has an aptitude for? DS12 wants to quit the school band. He’s in his second year of playing. Several of his reasons seem to be related to logistics and being stressed out by the rehearsal schedule. (It’s a long story and related to the weird way that our middle school handles 6th-grade activities.) But he also keeps banging on about not being “passionate” about his instrument. Sigh. I feel like if we could get him through this school year, the logistical headaches would resolve but he’s adamant that he doesn’t want to do it anymore. I’m probably taking this harder than I should because DH and I both were involved in music. DH continued through college; I did band through HS. DS wants to stick with choir, so he wouldn’t be giving up music entirely. This is outside my experience. When I asked to quit things, it was because I sucked at the activity and wasn’t having fun. He has actual ability here, according to both of the instrumental teachers that have taught him. Will he be angry and stressed if we make him keep doing an instrument? Or will he be disappointed in the future if he gives up too soon and the door is closed to picking it up in the future? What else should I be thinking about here?

I am so freakin done with school quarantines. My children were in back to back quarantines in November and now the first kid is in another one. Our school has such a broad definition of exposure (ride the bus, fully masked, for 20 minutes together? Whole bus is quarantined!) and it gets reported to the state so child is literally confined to our house for 10 days with an official quarantine letter. There is no option to test out. Remote school is even harder this year. My son is currently in his bed crying rather than be on the computer.

Generally, I’m glad to live in an area that takes this seriously, but this is ridiculous.

Probably a stupid question but how do you discipline preschool misbehavior? My almost 4 year old has obviously had meltdowns and stuff like that for years but for the first time is starting to be willfully defiant (e.g., I say “Please pick up those two toys that we’re done using” “No, I won’t! And you can’t make me”!) And I’m not sure what to do. Is there a natural consequence here? Am I supposed to be giving time-outs? My husband will also offer her a deal like she picks up one toy and he picks up the other and it kind of feels like that’s undermining me when I’ve already asked her to pick up both but I don’t know if I’m overreacting to that.

What do you do when your kid is the mean girl?

Apparently my 12-year-old stepdaughter (who is an absolute darling at home but for normal sibling stuff) is a big ol’ jerk at school. The school has told us that she is a major gossip and instigator of social drama and that there’s also some bullying going on (verbal, not physical – not because that’s okay but to be specific about the problem) of girls she perceives as below her in the social hierarchy. She has been getting in trouble for this at school (rightly) and is also losing friendships and becoming socially isolated. She is not herself part of the most popular group in the school, but a lot of this activity appears to be aimed at trying to ingratiate herself into that group.

Her mom is in denial about this and says it’s “normal girl stuff,” but the school has now called us in for a second meeting about it and the school counselor has also asked to meet with my SD’s therapist. And I’ve spoken to some other moms who have been willing to be candid with me and who have confirmed it. When we speak to my stepdaughter she always has an explanation (namely, that someone else started it, that she was just being honest by sharing with Girl A what Girl B said about her, that the mean thing she said about Girl C was accurate and everybody knows it)…so it’s all excuses and no acceptance of responsibility.

Obviously we’ll meet with the school and see her therapist for a family meeting as well, but any guidance from moms who have been there? I am horrified and honestly her behavior at home would never have caused me to suspect this. We were concerned that she didn’t seem to have close friends anymore…and it turns out it was for good reason.