I used to work out before heading into the office, and I always packed a dress in my gym bag. That way, I’d avoid the dread of forgetting half of my outfit. I especially loved wearing dresses during the hot, muggy summer — it felt like I was wearing shorts to work. Since I’ve been working from home, I’ve gravitated towards pants (OK, mostly leggings and sweats), and my rainbow of dresses just hang limply in my closet.
Once I head back to the office, I’d love to add Brass’ All-Day Dress to my wardrobe. I have a top in the same All-Day fabric, and it truly looks and feels fabulous, well, all day. After the day is done, it can go straight into the washing machine.
I love the All-Day Dress’ versatile sash and practical pockets. When I resume my pre-commute workouts, I’ll look forward to pulling this dress out of my bag wrinkle free. It’s available in three office-friendly colors and a wide range of sizes.
The black version of the dress is $108, while navy and fig are final sale for $85. It’s available in XXS–2X depending on the color. The All-Day Dress
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Sales of Note…
(See all of the latest workwear sales at Corporette!)
- Nordstrom – The Half-Yearly Sale has started! See our thoughts here.
- Ann Taylor – $50 off $150; $100 off $250+; extra 30% off all sale styles
- Banana Republic Factory – Up to 50% off everything + extra 25% off purchase
- Eloquii – 60% off all tops
- J.Crew – Up to 50% off “dressed up” styles (lots of cute dresses!); extra 50% off select sale
- J.Crew Factory – Up to 60% off everything; 60% off 100s of summer faves; extra 60% off clearance
- Loft – 40% off tops; 30% off full-price styles
- Lands’ End – 30% off full-price styles
- Talbots – 25-40% off select styles
- Zappos – 28,000+ sale items (for women)! Check out these reader-favorite workwear brands on sale, and some of our favorite kid shoe brands on sale.
Kid/Family Sales
- J.Crew – Up to 50% off kids’ camp styles; extra 50% off select sale
- Lands’ End – 30% off full-price styles
- Hanna Andersson – Up to 50% off summer pajamas; up to 50% off all baby styles (semi-annual baby event!)
- Carter’s – Summer deals from $5; up to 60% off swim
- Old Navy – 30% off your order; kid/toddler/baby tees $4
- Target – Kids’ swim from $8; summer accessories from $10
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And — here are some of our latest threadjacks of interest – working mom questions asked by the commenters!
- If you’re a working parent of an infant with low sleep needs, how do you function at work when you’re in the throes of baby’s sleep regression?
- Should I cut my childcare down to 12 hours a month if I work from home?
- Will my baby have speech delays if we raise her bilingual?
- Has anyone given birth in a teaching hospital?
- My child eats everything, and my friends’ kids do not – how should I handle? In general, what is the best way to handle when your child has some skill/ability and your friend’s child doesn’t have that skill/ability?
- ADHD moms, give me your tips to help with things like behavior in the classroom, attention to detail, etc?
- I think I suffer from mom rage…
- My husband and kids are gone this weekend – how should I enjoy my free time?
- I’m struggling to be compassionate with a SAHM friend who complains she doesn’t have enough hours of childcare.
- If you exclusively formula fed, what tips do you have for in the hospital and coming home?
- Could I take my 4-yo and 8-yo on a 7-8 day trip to Paris, Lyon, and Madrid?
strollerstrike says
Heeelp, how do you discipline a 16 months old?
He has become increasingly “testy” and we are not sure how to react in situations like
– throwing food and cups
– scratching, hitting, biting
– looking me dead in the eye while slowly putting a crayon in his mouth never breaking eye contact… after I have repeatedly told him not to
I have tried taking the objects away, he doesnt seem to care and stern warnings do nothing.
I feel like he is too young to understand the concept.
Anon says
I’d check out big little feelings on Instagram for tips, and buy the course if you like what you see.
Anon says
+1 – they are relatively new to the instagram game and for some reason I really really like them and have found following them more useful than the other parenting instas I know of! Hard to say why!
Also her daughter Junie is totally hilarious and a doll. Kristen’s oldest seems sweet, but I’m here for the toddler content!
Same says
I’ve been wondering when BigLittleFeelings was going to pop up here. I love them!
asdf says
I was told to redirect until my toddler was about 2. At 2.5 she definitely understands that there are things Mom and Dad don’t want her to do.
anon says
Take away the problem (i.e., food, arm being bitten, crayon) with a firm “No” or “No _______”
Then redirect to a different activity
Spirograph says
This.
Do not give warnings, do not have consequences that are not directly and immediately related to the undesired behavior. Kids that age can’t understand those complexities. First time he puts a crayon in his mouth, the crayons go away. Think of it more like training a dog than reasoning with a human.
I’m sure you know this, but bears repeating: this is completely normal boundary-testing. The more clear and absolute your boundaries are, the sooner he might give up on it (or not, that’s personality dependent!). If he feels like there’s wiggle room at the boundaries, though, he’ll definitely keep trying to figure out where the real limits are.
Anonymous says
This. Clear and simple language. ‘No eating crayons’ and take crayon away and pass him an appropriate toy to chew on. You will have to do this multiple times – like at least 50 before you see a difference. Kids are trying to understand their boundaries. Responding in a consistent way makes them helps them understand their boundaries. Don’t explain it extensively – he is trying to learn what is okay to chew (teethers) and what is not (crayons). One time doesn’t do it. And don’t just look at your kid when they are doing something dangerous like putting a crayon in their mouth.
Anonymous says
Yes. You will need to redirect over and over, it’s how they learn. Please do not try to “discipline” a 16 month old. They’re just learning how to be little humans. This is a normal part of development not a fault in their character. Read up on some normal child/toddler development.
Pogo says
Even at 3 we have way more success putting the offending item in time out than putting the child in time out. You can’t hit me with the toy broom if you don’t have a broom.
avocado says
This is what we did. At that age the things, not the kid, went into time-out. Now that she’s 13, I still put her devices in time-out when they are not being used properly.
cbackson says
Okay, I know this is frustrating but the imagine of your kiddo facing you down and putting a crayon in his mouth like Doc Holliday at the OK Corral is also deeply hilarious. I’M YOUR HUCKLEBERRY, MOM.
Anon Lawyer says
Yeah, that cracked me up too.
My 13-month-old hasn’t gotten there yet but she 100% has learned to drop food from her high chair deliberately in an effort to lure the dog, which is both cute and extremely annoying.
TheElms says
I have an 18 month old. I don’t think you can. I second the recommendation for BigLittleFeelings. I’ve seen improvement on chalk and crayon eating by taking them away consistently when it happens. We don’t give a warning because I don’t think she would understand that. We say things like “Crayons go on paper. You put the crayon in your mouth. Mom will take it away now and we can try again after nap/ this afternoon / tomorrow (whatever you want).” Then she has a tantrum and we distract/ redirect usually with a silly song. It took a solid couple of weeks of doing it but then all of a sudden she ate the crayons a lot less. Nothing is currently working on the hitting for us. At the moment I just ignore /walk away for a few minutes (2-3 minutes) and close her away from me with a baby gate. On the food throwing I offer to take anything she doesn’t want and she puts in in my hand and put it on the edge of my plate. Yes its gross, but a no thank you bowl didn’t work for us.
Anon. says
This language worked well for us, too.
I read somewhere that small kids sometimes don’t hear the “No” part of the message, so it’s best to explain what is appropriate (“crayons are for drawing on paper”, “hands are for gentle touches”) instead of saying what’s forbidden (“no eating crayons”, “no hitting”).
Anon says
My kid is extremely bright and extremely stubborn (my mother mentioned the word karma under her breath repeatedly). We started timeouts around that age which were very effective for her. For definite things that are hard nos like you describe, immediate time out. A firm no, simple explanation (we don’t throw things), and then into the PNP for a minute. Once she could climb out of the PNP (at 20 months, sigh) we would put her on the stairs for the minute. For more annoying things we would count 3 2 1 and then time out if she didn’t stop. She got the hang of it pretty quick, but the first week there were a lot.
anon says
16 months is really young for time outs.
Anon says
Yeah, I’ve always heard one minute per year of age for time out, so it’d be a one minute time out? Actually big little feelings insta mentioned above addresses this. But no judgment for those that DO do this – do what works for you! Lots of bright and stubborn kids on this board though, so lots of good ideas.
At that age we just remove whatever it is kid wanted or is misbehaving with. Or we remove kid. One thing on language – instead of saying “no chewing on crayons” I like to say “we don’t chew on crayons” – I think that angle is better for the next long time. You’re teaching them how we all behave and it’s not that they are misbehaving per se.
Anonymous says
IDK – doesn’t that require a higher level of language learning and can therefore be more confusing? Like kid has to understand that they are part of the ‘we’?
Earlier poster says
Replying on the language thing – maybe it does, I think I got it from How to Talk So Little Kids Will Listen (which I recommend and I really don’t read parenting books). I’m not sure language mattered for my first two kids but my third kid has a very visceral reaction to “no…” so it’s really been helpful with her! And she really responds well to ‘we…” maybe because she is a third and just wants to be like her big sibs.
Anon says
I agree it is really young for most kids. But it worked for my spirited kid who even at 15 months (now 3) was able to connect the time out to the behavior and the word no. It’s an option. It may not work for you. Reading some of the other responses here, I would have a feral kid literally hanging from the chandelier if I adopted those strategies (e.g., I have to say no 20,000 times a day because my kid consistently asks for unreasonable things, she is unbribeable, does not respond to positive reinforcement and DGAF if we take away the offending item) instead of a kid that is only half feral and can (most of the time) pretend to be civilized (in public).
Anon says
Check out Janet Lansbury, her book No Bad Kids: Toddler Discipline Without Shame and her podcast Unruffled. They are very, very helpful in giving the child’s perspective, reframing behavior from “misbehaving” to “normal toddler testing” and giving concrete strategies that work for little kids
Anon says
He’s trying to figure out what no means. That’s why he’s looking at you when you say it. And it’s why you shouldn’t say it.
Say, “Cups are for drinking from.” Take it away and ignore him. Say, “Crayons are for coloring.” Take it away and ignore him. Tell him what TO DO. “Walking feet instead of “No running.” “We only throw soft things inside” “We only throw things outside” “We use gentle hands” “We only touch babies feet” “We eat food, we don’t throw it”
No crayons for kids under two without super close supervision. (They are a choking hazard). Don’t make work for yourself. (Seriously, people who buy plastic plates sets for their kid that come in four colors: WHY? You have just, for no reason, created a massive amount of work for yourself negotiating the color of plates. My kid has white Corelle dishes. Never had a melt down about it. Don’t make more work for yourself.)
Anonymous says
Gah, so true about the plates. I told DH that my Christmas present to myself is flatware (somehow we only have 3 salad forks? and the dinner forks are too big for my kids) and more Corelle and getting rid of all the colored stuff so I don’t have to listen to the kids argue about who gets what color anymore.
Anon says
May the marketer who invented those sets burn in a lake of children screaming for a different color for all eternity.
Only the Purple Plate says
This is one of my two pieces of unsolicited parenting advice that I give:
1. Sign up for free trials of HBO/Starz/Cinemax while you’re trapped under a newborn with an all over sleep schedule.
2. One color of cups. One color of plates. Save yourself the screaming.
Anon says
Yes we initially got those Ikea kid plates/silverware/cups sets and hoo boy was it a mistake. We gave those to the grandparents for their house and bought a few sets of stainless steel kid-size options.
The reason people do that is the cost, though. Those patterned kid things are so much cheaper than plain white unbreakable alternatives. I know you mention Corelle, but my brother managed to break a Corelle when we were kids and we found shards for weeks afterwards, so I have a mental block against using those for kids.
Anon says
Corelle is very sturdy…until you drop it just the right way and it breaks, and then it absolutely shatters into millions of shards .
Anonymous says
This. Corelle and ceramic tile floors are not a good combination.
anon says
Yep, our ceramic tile kitchen floors are while we still have the IKEA plates.
Anonymous says
Specific language – “your food/cup stays on the table”. Throws it again? “Oh I see you’re done eating! Ok! All done!”. Bites? “No biting”, put the kid down. Hits? “Gentle touches please” and grab his hand and show him how to touch softly. A lot of time hitting at this age is just about learning how to touch people. Eats a crayon? “Not in the mouth!” Take the crayon away. Repeat 50 times a day. Congrats! You have a toddler
Advice re fellow parent says
TLDR: How do you handle talking with a parent at your children’s school who says often says offensive/inappropriate things?
There’s a parent at my kid’s school who says a lot of things that I find objectionable, like commenting on bodies and statements that I find racist or classist, though have some plausible deniability. I often see her outside the school at pickup and the pick up area and age of the children (requiring parents to get out of their car and wait in an area for pickup) mean I can’t really avoid her. With Covid precautions, each waiting parent is about 10 feet away from anyone else, so conversations are easily overheard. It’s just a couple minutes, and around children, so I feel like it’s hard to take the time to explain why I think it’s bad to say xyz.
I’ve been trying to quickly say something like “I see it this way…” or just not commenting and saying goodbye because by the time she’s done saying something uncomfortable, my kid has run out, wants my attention, and is demanding to leave. However, I don’t feel great about how I’m handling it; I both have trouble being warm to this parent and feel bad for not more directly shutting down such talk.
Complicating things: I’m likely to see her regularly for many years, though it’ll diminish next year when the kids transition to carpool pickup. I’m also a lot more privileged in major ways and am head of the PTA. My role requires me to be approachable and welcoming to parents, so I don’t want to just bury my head in my phone at pickup.
How do I handle this better?
Anon says
I would try harder to avoid her or look busy when she is nearby and wants to chat. It’s not your job to educate other parents you don’t know that well about what is appropriate, even if you are active in the PTA. It’s great you want to be approachable, but maybe that mentality doesn’t work in this situation.
Pogo says
Can you give an example? This could really run the gamut. If it’s “Oh look, Lizzy has a little boyfriend!” I might say, “Aw let’s give them some time to grow up!” rather than launching into a feminist rant. If it’s a racist comment specifically directed at other parents like “All those [one specific ethnicity] moms always stick together huh?” I would say “I actually don’t find that to be true and I hope we can make ABC school a welcoming place for everyone.” (the second example is a real-life one, though it was in an online group not IRL).
Op says
Thank you, Pogo. One example was that this parent was upset that a family in our community was taking a Covid risk (that was probably essential to this family, but the kind of thing that differently situated families might be able to cut out) and was advocating for the school to ban families from taking this risk.
Meanwhile, this parent hasn’t exactly been a model of following local health guidance.
Hmm says
Can’t you just say “not everyone had the option to cut XYZ out” and then move on (either to a new topic or physically avoid further discussion?) No need to turn it into a lecture but you don’t hate to passively accept what she’s saying
Anon says
That seems pretty benign to me. Everyone is judging and gossiping about who’s doing what re:Covid. You don’t have to agree with her if you don’t, but I would just ignore a comment like this.
Anon says
Yikes. I think it kind of depends on what it is that she explicitly says. think the hard line I would draw is at the racist comments, especially if as you say, other kids are around. I honestly think in that situation your best bet might be to go through an authority figure at the school to have a zero tolerance conversation with her next time she says something outright racist. If everyone can hear her, that actually works to your benefit because then it could have been anyone that said something. I don’t know. To be fair I’m coming from the Bay Area where a school would take this seriously, but I know unfortunately not every school/area would be like that.
For the other stuff, I would just keep doing what you are doing, making it obvious you don’t agree with her, don’t associate with her otherwise, etc. People will get that it’s her, not you, and you aren’t going to say anything that’s going to “change” her.
Anonymous says
That’s insane. You’re an adult. Speak directly to her at least once before complaining to the school. How do you even function?
Anon says
The poster clearly feels uncomfortable explicitly calling her out on it, so I’m offering a different option. I stand by that it IS the school’s business if there are loud, super racist things being said on their grounds in the earshot of a lot of the kids, even if it’s by a parent. Maybe what she is saying exactly doesn’t quite meet this level of escalation needed, but without more specifics it’s hard to know.
Anonymous says
‘Not sure if I agree with that’ and ducking out works for a lot of situations. I try to look busy on my phone around parents I don’t want to talk to. Ironically I’m usually texting DH about dinner that night or venting to my sister about my parents vs anything essential.
DLC says
I really like this response, and am going to put it into my box text folder. It lets you say something without explicitly telling the other parent that they are wrong, or having to go into lengthy arguments.
I also like Carolyn Hax’s suggestion of “Wow.” or “What do you mean by that?” I often find saying less is more telling that saying more.
Anon says
If she’s speaking to others but you overhear, I would just ignore. If she speaks directly to you, I’d probably say something like “I don’t agree with that.” I live in a very conservative and white Evangelical Christian area so the majority of people I know hold very different views than me and I don’t see a lot of point in debating them – neither of us is going to change the other’s mind and it would just make things harder for my kid to be the child of the ‘difficult’ mom.
OP says
Thanks, all. I really appreciate your advice and perspectives.
Pogo says
Pro-tip… do not let your password expire while on maternity leave because it’s a PITA to fix it once it has expired and you’re remote.
In other news, I’m getting excited for my return after listening to that HBR podcast rec’d yesterday which made me feel seen and also motivated me even more to stay in the game. I just set up some catchup meetings with key people for when I get back and went and accepted meetings that I had left sitting in my inbox and edited the response to say, “I’m back on Jan 4, looking forward to reconnecting” or whatever.
For the first few weeks while DH is on paternity leave, the baby will be home with him. For those of you who use noise-cancelling headphones so you aren’t distracted, do you listen to music? white noise? or just turn on the cancelling feature and nothing else? I’m on calls a lot but not 24/7.
When the 3yo was home for the first half of the pandemic, I wasn’t bothered by him and didn’t feel a need. But I feel like if I hear the baby crying I will get really distracted in a way hearing my 3yo tantrum I did not.
Anonymous says
I like classical music. Something to keep my brain occupied without lyrics to get in the way of what I am trying to write.
Anonymous says
Me too, but it’s Beethoven’s birthday today and my classical station is playing all the Beethoven, which is almost as distracting as music with lyrics because I love it so much.
I actually find K-pop to be my absolute favorite music to work to. I don’t understand half the lyrics, so it’s not distracting, and the beat keeps me moving.
Anonymous says
I cannot listen to classical music while writing. Since I spent my entire life up through age 21 playing in orchestras and wind ensembles, to me classical music will always be focused listening. It is just too distracting to be background music. I can’t really even listen to it while driving, because if I zone out I feel compelled to skip back to where my attention wandered.
Spirograph says
Same. Open world video game soundtracks are really good for me, they’re basically just atmospheric stuff. Or sometimes I pull up one of those “music for studying / deep focus” playlists
DLC says
I’m that way about instrumental classical music. Choral music, though, I find works for me. Like early a capella church music . Sometimes solo piano music too, but not so much.
1:30 anon says
Choral music doesn’t even work for me, because I still sing in a choir! Sadly, I am doomed to work in silence forever.
AnonATL says
I’ve been stuck in perma-mod so we will see if this goes through, but I have the over-ear bose noise cancelling headphones that I wear almost all day. A couple things I’ve noticed:
When my vertigo is acting up, turning on the noise cancelling part makes me dizzy. I can use the normal headphone part, but not the noise-cancelling.
My ears and head hurt if I wear them for too long. I’ll play instrumental music on one of our smart speakers for a couple hours to give my ears a break.
I rotate a few stations on spotify. I like Fresh folk, Mood Booster, Atmospheric Piano, and Productive Morning depending on my mood and what I’m working on. I can’t listen to lyrics if I’m puzzling something out with a lot of logic (writing code, math intensive work, etc).
I use my headphones for calls since they are through teams. If I’m on video, I’ll switch to my apple in-ear ones to look marginally more professional, but that’s personal preference. A lot of my colleagues do video calls with over-ear headphones on.
Good luck returning from maternity leave!
Anonymous says
I thought you had to let your password expire if that happened during maternity leave, at least if your leave was funded by disability insurance. We don’t allow employees on leave to do any work.
Pogo says
Only my first six weeks were disability and I was careful not to do any work then. I think I’m actually on regular PTO right now as my leave was cobbled together from disability, unpaid FMLA, actual paternity leave from my company and vacation.
Boston Legal Eagle says
My pw also expired last maternity leave and it was annoying, but probably more annoying if you can’t just find your IT friend in the hallway!
I too listened to classical music, mostly. Too many words distracts me and just silence was not enough.
Realist says
In the headphones, I usually just have the cancellation feature on but sometimes I turn on music. Usually something from the Calm app.
Anon says
Planning on trying to conceive in 2021. Currently take Effexor 150 mg for Generalized Anxiety Disorder. Started seeing a new psychiatrist as my old one moved, and he is apprehensive about switching me to Zoloft. Has anyone taken Effexor throughout pregnancy? My OB/GYN wants me to continue medication but is most comfortable with Zoloft as am I.
Anon Lawyer says
Have you sought out a reproductive psychiatrist specifically? That’s who I’d talk to. OBGYNs are not well versed in this.
Anonymous says
I haven’t. Unfortunately, there aren’t many in my area (still near a major city). But good suggestion.