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During the holidays, my family loves to try out new games — this one was a hit at Thanksgiving!
Sushi Go! is a quick, pick-and-pass card game where you try to get the most points through the perfect combination of sushi. Two to five people can play at a time, and it’s fun for little kids (the game says eight and up, but I think any kid who can do some basic addition can play) and adults.
Order in some real sushi and make it a party!
Sushi Go! is $6.29 at Target and also available at Amazon.
Sales of note for 3.26.24
(See all of the latest workwear sales at Corporette!)
- Ann Taylor – Up to 40% off your full-price purchase; extra 50% off sale
- Banana Republic Factory – 50-70% off everything plus extra 20% off purchase
- Eloquii – 50% off all workwear
- J.Crew – Annual Spring Event: 40% off sitewide; extra 40% off sale styles
- Lands’ End – 10% off your order
- Loft – 50% off Lou & Grey; 30% off new arrivals
- Nordstrom: Spring Sale: Up to 50% off
- Talbots – 25% off your purchase, including markdowns
- Zappos – 37,000+ women’s sale items! (check out these reader-favorite workwear brands on sale, and some of our favorite kids’ shoe brands on sale)
Kid/Family Sales
- Carter’s – 40% off everything; extra 10% off your purchase with code
- Hanna Andersson – Up to 30% off swim; up to 30% off HannaJams
- J.Crew Crewcuts – 40% off sitewide; extra 40% off sale; 50% off kids’ styles
- Old Navy – 50% off Easter deals
- Target – 20% off Easter styles for all; up to 30% kitchen & dining; up to 25% off TVs; BOGO 50% off shoes & slippers for the family; $100 off select Apple products
Tea/Coffee says
+1 for sushi go! We love it. Also, Ramen Fury. The problem is, both games tend to make us hungry :-)
Cb says
We liked unstable unicorns. And for board games, ticket to ride junior is really fun. Although my 5 year old is mostly obsessed with mahjong (an obsession which began when grandma let him play on the ipad)
octagon says
What age range do you think is good for Unstable Unicorns?
We’ve had great luck with our 7yo with Mantis and Don’t Llama. Also, don’t sleep on an old-fashioned game of Spoons with a bigger group – it’s simple enough that kids as young as 5-6 can play.
Cb says
I think my son is slightly young, the instructions in the pack weren’t super clear but we watched a YouTube video which helped.
Anonymous says
I strongly associate Mahjong with older people and love the mental image of a 5 year old sitting down to play in a room full of wizened septuagenarians+ so much.
Cb says
Haha, he is an old soul. But loves it.
Tea/Coffee says
We actually had Ticket to Ride Jr on a shelf for a couple of years (i kept forgetting about it). Finally broke it out over TG weekend and it’s solidly in our rotation now. Kids are 7 and 11 and DH is obsessively competitive about games so we are all hooked!
For kids that are slightly too young for actual battleship – try battleship shots. It’s fun but don’t play near any piece of furniture that the balls can roll under!
Spirograph says
I’ve never seen this game, but I love small card games that we can bring on the go. Our current favorite is Spot It — it fits in my purse, and if we get stuck waiting somewhere, it keeps the kids from asking if they can play games on my phone.
Anonymous says
Another +1 for Sushi Go. We prefer the original to the party version.
LadyNFS says
I know this has been discussed before, but looking for board game recs for a kindie kid. All I’ve got is Uno (which she loves) and could use some ideas for the holidays. Thanks!
octagon says
Outfoxed is a fun cooperative game. Blokus is fun and a tetris gateway.
Boston Legal Eagle says
Monopoly Jr.!
Anonymous says
Run, walk or crawl; we made it to Friday! Got any cute kid stories or mom wins you want to share?
Anon says
Happy Friday! Yesterday my 3 year old daughter woke-up and crawled into my bed to cuddle. She started to gently pet my shoulder and said she was going to help me sleep because she is “special and kind”. I just appreciate she used those words to describe herself unprompted.
Anon says
Mom win… we had our parent teacher conferences yesterday and everything is on track academically and with motor skills, but the teacher really raved about how kind our 5 year old is. She said she’s a friend to everyone, resolves conflicts between other kids and includes other kids when someone is left out. We were so happy to hear this.
Emma says
My baby is almost 3 months and she is smiling so much – at me, her dad, and the dog :) it’s the best. She also slept 6,5 hours in one stretch last night which honestly felt like a lifetime. I’m very excited for our first holiday season with her and just git her Chrismukkah stocking in the mail! I remember looking at the stockings last year and really, really hoping we would have an extra one by this year.
Vicky Austin says
Teared up at this one.
Anonymous says
My baby is also 3 months and the smiles are amazing. We just had our first (accidental) roll over this week too.
Last christmas, my husband said “who knows, maybe you’ll be pregnant next year.” Turns out he was almost right, just off a year, I was probably a couple of weeks pregnant then.
An.On. says
My kid managed a full sentence today, it was (while pointing at breakfast) “Cheese, Dada!”
Anonymous says
Love it!
Anon says
This one gives me all the feels. One of my kid’s first sentences was “I like cheese” such a happy memory you helped me remember :)
Anonymous says
Love this! My kid’s first sentence was also about cheese.
Anonymous says
My mom win for the week is that I made it to Friday. It’s been a doozy. I was thankful that 9am-me remembered to dump something in the crock pot yesterday morning. The rest of the day went 100% sideways, but at least we had food ready when the dust settled at dinnertime.
avocado says
My nephew’s preschool Christmas concert was last night. I am incredibly run down from work travel and my husband had another commitment so we weren’t going to go. My 15-year-old insisted that she could not miss it so I pried myself off the couch and took her. The 3- and 4-year-olds yelling Christmas carols while waving paper snowflakes attached to popsicle sticks were delightful and my SIL and BIL were absolutely tickled that my kid wanted so badly to be there for her little cousin.
avocado says
Oh, and for anyone who remembers my rant of two weeks ago she does not have mono after all!
AwayEmily says
That is so sweet. Your daughter is the best.
Vicky Austin says
YAY! It was her turn for some good luck. And this is a super sweet story as well. Her little cousin must think she’s the coolest.
Anon says
Something sentimental broke accidentally (well my husband put it away so that when I opened a cabinet it tumbled out). I was on the verge of tears. My nearly five year old came over and said mommy you need a hug, maybe you can buy another one on Amazon?
So Anon says
No specific anecdote, but I want to share that I am genuinely enjoying spending time with my almost 12 yo son and 9 yo daughter right now. For my son – I still seem glimpses of the little boy when he snuggles with a stuffy at night, and he is also coming up to me randomly during the evenings and asking for a hug. My 9 yo is so aware of her friend group, and it is so much fun to see the stuff that she is into (which is not Doc Martens despite my gentle nudges). When they are not yelling at each other, we have fun together. (Actually, I’ll ask a separate question about that below.) I’m also really proud that I’m pushing for her to be evaluated for ADHD/ASD despite her dad “not seeing anything.”
AIMS says
I overheard my kids devising experiments to see if Santa is real. First idea was to leave out cookies but “what if Daddy just eats the cookies?” Second idea was to not tell anyone what they want to see if they still get it.
I honestly don’t even care if they figure it out, just really happy that they’re working together and seem kind of savvy about the whole thing.
Anonymous says
On Monday, a girl in my 3 year old sons class (we’ll call her Claire) got sick in class and went home and was out all day on Tuesday. For drop off, each kid has to ring the bell individually to be welcomed into class. Sometimes there is a line to get into class if many people are dropping off at the same time. On Wednesday morning, Claire was back at school and was in line before us to go into the classroom. After Claire went into the classroom, and her mom started back down the side walk to go to her car, my son put both arms in the air and said to Claire’s mom, “I am SO HAPPY Claire is feeling better today!!!”
Claire’s mom thought the sentiment was very sweet, thoughtful and kind (as did I), but was a bit surprised that it came from a three year old.
Anonymous says
I have a cute kid story about someone else’s kid. A little girl at aftercare (I have the impression that she’s a casual of my daughter, but not one of her besties) is just the sweetest. I’ve never met her parents, but they must be doing a great job. She runs up and gives me a hug at least a few times a week, compliments my clothes/accessories, asks me about my day, and chit chats about hers if I have to wait for my kids. Her name is Precious and it’s spot on.
Boston Legal Eagle says
Last weekend, we took the kids to a playground and they played together while we got to sit and read for nearly an hour. This may not seem like a big deal, but they typically want us to play with them or we need to intervene to stop a squabble. But they just played together, and played pretend.
And the other thing I’m proud of, even though I don’t think it’s anything we did beyond the passage of time, but my 6 year old is night and day this school year compared to last year when he was in K. He dealt with a lot of restraint collapse last year, for months, after school, but this year’s transition has gone so so much better.
Anon says
Mom win- i almost survived solo parenting my sick 4 year old twins (DH comes home today). One twin is back in school and honestly being responsible for just one child is like a vacation.
One of my twins is very into what I wear and I have different colored sports bras and she’s always telling me she likes my bra which cracks me uo
OP says
Been thinking about you.
anon says
My 17 month old is very into bubbles right now and apparently that’s what he wakes up thinking about. I hear him from his crib saying “mama, bubbles!” and then eventually he just conflates it to “mubbles!”. There’s no better way to start the day. :)
Anon says
My husband put on a suit (now a rare occasion) for a work event last night. When he came to say goodbye and goodnight to our 2.5 year old, our son pointed to his belt and said, “That looks like a hula hoop!” I’m still giggling over this.
sick and tired says
I know we’re all in this boat, but I’m so done with the sickness this year. In the last month we’ve had COVID, HFM, and now some mystery virus. I need tips to get us healthy and to stay healthy. Someone mentioned a post-coivd vitamin regime a while back? TIA
Anon says
No vitamin advice, and this is take-it-or-leave-it (and you might already be doing it), but are you masking in public right now? If not, I’d start there. Annoying? For sure. But where we are (NYC area) EVERYTHING is high right now (flu, RSV, Covid, general bugs) and it seems like masking plus handwashing is the easiest first line of defense.
anon says
I think masking + getting plenty of sleep are both really helpful.
Anon says
I don’t disagree that masking in public is an easy, low cost (for most people) step to take and it definitely protects others if you’re sick, but I’m not sure how much good it does for you, especially when it comes to non-Covid things. Covid is way more infectious than most respiratory viruses. I don’t believe I’ve ever gotten a cold, flu, RSV, or a stomach bug from a stranger. I’ve had those viruses plenty, but I’ve always been able to trace it a household member, or a friend or colleague I had relatively close contact with. So by all means mask in public, but if you have kids in daycare or school I would expect them to be the source of most illnesses you get, not strangers at the mall or the grocery store.
AIMS says
We do vitamins and I do think it helps. I look for ones with vitamin c and elderberry for the immunity boost. I also try to get everyone to eat a lot of fruits and veggies. For myself, I swear by emergen-c too. That and lots of rest and hand washing.
Anonymous says
Oh god I need that too. Same here and I’m over it!!
So Anon says
Sibling Fighting: How do you all maintain your sanity when your older kids (tweens/teens) are fighting/arguing with each other? Any tips? My kids are 9 and 12. They will play together and then in the blink of an eye the play turns to yelling (and occasionally hitting/kicking or throwing the nearest object at each other). I absolutely intervene if I see a hint that someone may get physical but I don’t want to stand over them at all times.
AwayEmily says
HUGE caveat that my kids are younger so I have no idea if this would work for older kids, but having some “safe words” has been really helpful for minimizing physical conflict. In our house the two key phrases are “no games” if a person wants something physical to stop (e.g. wrestling, tickling, chasing) and “I need some space” if someone feels like they are about to lose it (the person who says “I need some space” walks away and the other person is not allowed to follow them).
Meg says
Separate them. Only thing that works for me. Different floors of the house. Day before thanksgiving it was so bad they weren’t allowed on the same floor for the whole day.
Anon says
Is the intensity relatively new? I’ve recently gone on a deep dive into stages of development, and the third stage starts at 12 (12-18). Supposedly, siblings get along better when they are on the same plane and have more friction when they are on different planes. So, not to say you throw up your hands and ignore it, but it may be a natural ebb/flow and someday will settle.
I am hoping this to be true, as I eager await my middle guy turning 6 (second plane) to hopefully bring some calm to our household (he and 7yo brother are very contentious right now).
Spirograph says
Interesting! My kids are all 6-10, and while they usually get along well about 80% of the time, I lost my cool with them earlier this week because they have just been squabbling constantly in the mornings.
So Anon, I take your approach of intervening if I see or hear if things are turning physical, and just accept that sometimes I’m only going to know about it after someone gets hit. If everything just seems to be escalating, I agree with Meg – separate them. If you can’t play the game nicely, the game gets put away and you need to find something to do independently for a while.
Our highest-conflict times are when everyone’s trying to be in the same place at the same time getting ready for school or bed. I have to direct traffic: you go get your pjs on, you go brush your teeth, you get your backpack prepped for tomorrow, then rotate. Otherwise the next thing I know they’re all shoving each other in front of the sink.
Anonymous says
Mine are 8 and 11. Zero tolerance for hitting or throwing objects. Immediate time out and loss of electronics for 24 hrs if it happens more than once in a day. Have not had to escalate beyond that.
Daycare gifts says
What’s the recommended gift amount for teachers at daycare?
Kid is in the 2-3 room and has two regular teachers and an occasional floater. Live in the suburbs of a SEUS city. He joined this school in august.
Is $50 about right?
Anon says
There is so much variation. This year at our preschool the class mom is allowed to collect money – I’m class mom and I’ve had people give from 0-$50 for holiday gifts and 0-100 for birthdays. In my daughter’s class the two people who give zero i hope are maybe doing there own thing bc i happen to know that both families are very well off and it’s absurd to me if they are giving nothing
OOO says
I live in an LCOL and give $80 to teachers, $60 to lead aides and $40 to floaters
Anonymous says
I would always divide a week’s fee between all of the teachers for daycare
Anon says
Sounds about right. LCOL Midwest. We gave $50/teacher (four people: two official teachers and two aides), until our school started a schoolwide collection, then we gave $200 to the group collection. Group collection is divided amongst everyone, including floaters and kitchen staff, so it probably does work out to less per teacher, but I like that because we didn’t have a good way of recognizing these other staff members before (I don’t even know all their names). Fwiw, $200 is quite a bit less than a week’s tuition even in Pre-K, but feels plenty generous to me. I get the sense we’re above average but I could be wrong.
School Choice says
I’m having a really hard time picking a school for kindergarten next year. I have two boys. Our public school district is about 35th in the state (out of 600 districts) and 5th in the county. It’s a 5 minute drive from my house. Although if I moved about 10 minutes away, I’d be in either of the two neighboring suburbs and their schools are 1st and 3rd in the state. We have friends in both districts and may consider moving in a few years to get a bigger house. We also are in an area with several top ranked private schools in the state so people in these top districts are still sending to private school for some reason. Two particularly are ones where we have friends sending their kids. Both start at around $23K for kindergarten and are mid $30s for high school (todays prices). One is all boys and one is co-ed. Both are 15 minutes away and my school district would provide busing for free (but we’d probably have to pick up from aftercare). There is also a Jewish day school that is 10 minutes away. The kids are in the early childhood center there now. It has the same accreditation as the two private schools I mentioned but only goes until 8th grade and is about $10K cheaper at each grade level. Kids would also learn Hebrew. I feel like they’re all good choices and we could probably afford them all (HHI is around $400K now and no debt) but I’m just stuck about how to choose a private school or if I should just go to the public school. Is it even worth paying for the private school in this situation when the public school is pretty good and 5 minutes away? What else should I be considering?
Anonymous says
I think it would be straight up insane to throw your money away on private school when you live 5 minutes away from an excellent public school.
Lily says
I agree. Send them to the public school. If they aren’t thriving there for whatever reason, you can consider the parochial or private school as a backup. If you move, then they’ll move schools – it’s not the end of the world, especially in early elementary school.
In my view, the people who live in excellent school districts but send their kids to the fancy private school fall into two buckets: people whose kids are not thriving in the public school because they have learning or social difficulties, OR people who are snobs and obsessed with social status and don’t want to send their kids to school with the masses (even the very upper middle class masses).
Anon says
I think there are other reasons as well if it’s a specialized private school- my post is stuck in mod, but my parents sent me to a Jewish school growing up bc the Jewish piece was very important to them, or there was also a French immersion private school near me
Lily says
I said “fancy private schools,” though, I was not including parochial schools. Obviously if someone is very religious and that’s important to them in their kid’s education, then that’s a reasonable consideration, though personally I would not want my kid going to a school where everyone is exactly like them, down to their religion.
School Choice says
I should have mentioned that one reason we’re considering the private school options is that the public school doesn’t have early childhood. So our 2.5 year old would need to be at a different school for two years from his brother if his brother went to public school. He’ll likely stay at the jewish day school for the next two years. The two other private schools offer pre-K through 12th. Logistically, I’m worried about having two schools and two drop offs/picks ups. I’m a new litigation partner and travel a lot. And something else that is drawing me to the private schools is that they might provide more individual attention and in-school support (or at least that’s my perception from the school tours). My friends’ kids in the public schools are all paying for extra tutors. I’m not sure I can add that to my plate too. Some of them are SAHMs.
Anon says
This sounds weirdly competitive and rat race-y. Are you in the Bay Area? I have good friends there and a lot of families have really toxic attitudes about schools. I think you can opt out of this. The average child in a well-ranked public school does not need private tutoring – in our good public school district the only people I know with tutors have kids who are really falling behind or are exceptionally gifted and unchallenged by the normal curriculum (so maybe the bottom 10-20% and the top 1%). The vast majority of kids are not in that category.
anon says
If you’re a litigation partner, I’d get an au pair or nanny to help with pick up, drop off, holidays, sick days, vacation days, half days, etc, using the money you’ll save by sending them to a public school. You’ll need more childcare than just school regardless of public or private.
Anon says
Honestly the tutoring things sounds more like something a Type A parent thinks is necessary rather than something a typical child would actually need.
Anonymous says
I mean if you want to buy into the nonsense that is hiring a tutor for a 5 year old that’s on you. You’re rich congrats. You can afford private. It’s a values statement.
anon says
My high performing elementary school used Lucy Caulkins to teach reading for several years and during that period either parents or tutors taught kids to read (except for the small percentage to teach themselves). I know tons of 5-8 yos who had reading tutors because they were very behind grade level. The schools have now switched to a phonics based curriculum and I expect the need for tutors to drop precipitously.
Anonymous says
It’s really easy to start thinking that because all the other rich families are doing x, my kids are going to have miserable lives if we don’t too, but don’t fall for it. Your kids will likely be fine no matter where you go. Test scores are frequently a reflection of family resources more than anything else. I’m a die-hard advocate for public school, and my husband is a public school teacher, so I’m biased, but my guess is the biggest thing private school could potentially offer that would have an impact academically is smaller class sizes. That’s the low hanging fruit for improving educational outcomes and the thing that public schools always have trouble paying for. Private schools are spending a lot more per student, and you see that in class sizes and facilities. FYI, at least in my area, public school teaching positions pay better and have better benefits, so private schools and especially charter schools aren’t necessarily getting the best teachers. When my husband—a PhD with 10 years of college teaching experience, was looking for a high school job, he found that some of the charter networks pretty obviously focus on recruiting recent graduates, work them really hard and don’t expect them to last more than 5 years. (Think about the interns at your company and then consider how stupid this approach for any reasons beyond financial). Private and charter schools also don’t have to accept every kid, which means that they don’t have to deal with kids with disabilities, kids who don’t speak English, kids who are homeless, kids whose parents can’t doula afterschool projects or activities for hours every day, kids who may not have had breakfast, etc.
anon says
So my kids are in a public immersion school and while most of the parents of other kindergarteners are content to just let the kids pick up the language as they go along, there are multiple parents (that I know of) who are paying for their kids to have 6 hours of extra language tutoring per week “so they’ll pick it up faster”. It’s 100% not that the public school isn’t providing sufficient support, it’s that parents get super anxious about making sure their kid is the top and tutors are an easy way to think that you’re providing that opportunity.
Anon says
Immersion school is a bit different, I think. I feel like that probably self-selects for more involved families, and I also understand the impulse to hire a tutor if you don’t speak the language at home. But I’m sure it also depends where you live. I have close friends in the Bay Area and it does seem like everyone has tutors there, but my experience in a small Midwest city has been very different. People here tend to be pretty hands-off unless their kid is having a problem in school.
Anonymous says
Lack of early childhood/full day K and lack of wraparound care in the public schools is a HUGE reason why people in my area are choosing private schools over the very good local public schools, and it’s not just wealthy people making these choices.
Anonymous says
to the anonymous at 3:23 This is another interesting regional difference. the wraparound care at our public elementary school is cheaper and has longer hours than the care at our private school did (to be fair, covid was a factor)
Anon says
Yep our public schools have affordable wraparound care ons1te, 6 am to 6 pm. The people who need before and aftercare most are blue collar workers with inflexible schedules, so it doesn’t make sense to me that private schools would have more extended hours.
Anon says
+1. Also I am Jewish and send my kids to weekly Sunday school at a Reform temple so they can learn about their heritage, but wouldn’t consider a Jewish day school for my kids fwiw. Unlike Jewish preschools and JCC programs, which are normally pretty secular and welcoming to all, Jewish day schools are very religious and religion is too big a part of the curriculum for me (a secular Jew). I also think it would be very tough socially as a secular Jew or non-Jew. JCC programs are different and tend to be more diverse, but I have never heard of an actual Jewish day school that wasn’t 95% Jewish.
Anon says
There is a HUGE variety in terms of how religious Jewish day schools can be. Obviously they might all still be too religious for you personally, but based on my experience (i myself attended 3 diff ones in two different states and my kids are now at a fourth in a different state) and the level of religiousness at each is extremely variable. They all mostly have Jewish kids, which makes sense, though the one my kids are at now and the local Jewish high school has a growing percentage of non Jewish students
Anon says
That’s fair. I know there’s a big difference between Orthodox and Reform and the schools I’m familiar with are more at the Orthodox/Conservative end of the spectrum, which is obviously not the right choice for someone who is more secular. If we had to do a religious schools, we’d definitely prefer a Jewish school to a Christian or Catholic one, but I’m still skeptical I would want my kids in a religion based school full-time. Like someone else said above, there’s an inherent lack of diversity in religious schools. We live in a area with a very small (<1%) Jewish population and we really value getting to know other Jewish families and teaching our kids about their heritage, but we consider that an extracurricular that supplements public school with a more diverse group. I don't think I'd want my kids in a full-time environment that was almost all Jewish kids. Maybe I would feel differently if we had a great Reform day school near us, but my gut instinct about Jewish day school is no.
Anonymous says
Yup while our Jewish school is definitely religious, there are actually a ton of non Jewish kids there, which is totally shocking to me.
Not worth it says
I tend to agree with this. Take the $600-800k+ that you will save and put it in an investment account. Divide it between your kids when they graduate and let them use it to buy a house, start a small company, etc.
It would be different if this was a religious decision or there was an issue with the public school option, etc.
Tea/Coffee says
+1 and we are (now) a private school family. Try the public. You can always apply to privates later, and you can always return to public. But for ES it is SO HELPFUL to have close-neighborhood friends. Our private friends are great but they require a car ride, not a bike ride.
Anon says
We are in a similar boat right down to the Jewish day school, though ours only goes through 5th grade. There is no “right” answer, just lots of different ones. It all depends on what is important to your family and the environment that you think will work best for your kids. I myself grew up in an area with excellent public schools, but my parents sent my sister and I to Jewish day school (it went through 12th) bc the Jewish piece was important to them- we both thrived there for different reasons. I was very academic and the challenge of also learning another language was good for me and made it easier for me to learn a 3rd language later on. My sister really benefited from the community aspects of the school. We both benefitted from the smaller class size but in different ways. The teachers were for the most part fantastic. And my parents made amazing friends who they are still friends with today, though it’s been almost 20 years since i graduated high school. For my own kids we are probably going to try out the public school and if it’s not the right fit switch back to the Jewish school. A few reasons for this – DH went to public school growing up though he actually loves our kids experience at preschool so much he became more pro private school than he thought he’d be. The public middle and high school options aren’t the best, so it’s common to do public elementary and then private later on, so trying to save our money for that. While i loved my Jewish school growing up, i really wasn’t exposed to a diverse crowd, which seems to be of increasing importance. I have twin girls who happen to be in an extremely boy heavy grade at their school and I’m concerned what that means socially for them as they get older if they stay bc i think it’s important for them each to be able to make their own friends, especially since girls can be mean. If i had two kids two different ages, we might be making a different decision. Reasons why i think we could end up switching back are that one of our kids in particular might need a smaller class size, we live in a blue city in a red state with too much chatter about what can/can’t be taught in public schools and i don’t want to send my kids to school where certain topics are censored or books banned, and I’m not sure if it’s going to be the right community for our family
Emily Sealy says
I’m speaking as a very happy private school parent: How do each of them feel? Have you toured all of them? Is there one that just felt “right?” Our area has several fine and expensive private schools, several fine and less expensive private/religious schools, and meh public schools. We narrowed our focus to private and religious schools that were within a 15 minute radius and did comparisons from information we found online and from talking with friends. We really had it narrowed down to one private/religious school or try the public school, and when we toured, it just felt like home. Decision done, because it had checked all the boxes of cost, academics, location, and reputation, but what was ultimately going to make the decision was how it felt when I walked in. And it instantly and overwhelmingly felt like my kids would thrive here. For us, cost is certainly a consideration, but we would have made cuts elsewhere to afford the right fit school, so more important factors were commute/location, academics and socieo-emotional curriculum. If, hypothetically, cost, location, and academics are all the same, does the Jewish day school rise to the top for any reason? Or, if academics and cost are the same, does a different school rise to the top? Maybe by asking yourself these questions, you will come to a decision.
Anonymous says
I agree with this. There are good and less-good things about all schools, and there are intangibles that can make all the difference.
FWIW, I was one of those public school parents who fled to private in 2020 when our public school announced it would be online only, and my kids were in private school for two years. They are now back in our good-but-not-great public elementary school. I like both of them for different reasons. The private school’s academics were superior, but it was too small of a pond, socially. I was worried about the switches and that they would struggle with being “the new kids,” but it has been a non-issue. I would caution against seeing this decision as final, in any case. As your kids get older, you’ll be able to tell how their school environment is or is not serving them well. You can always make a change when that happens. So the question is not “where should my kids go to school forever?” it’s, “where should my kids go to school next year?”
Anonymous says
I live in an area with some of the best public schools in the country and we don’t send our kids there. You have almost no control over what goes on there. There’s little to nothing you can do about the discipline of another child if your child is harassed or even hit in a classroom (they may move their desk. Wow). They’re teaching non-binary gender in kindergarten here which is a huge no go for our family’s values. And teachers self-admittedly move at the pace of the slowest child in the class. Public schools are not what they used to be.
Anonymous says
Discipline and teaching to the bottom end of the spectrum are huge issues in our highly rated public schools as well.
Anon says
What is wrong with teaching kindergarteners that non-binary people exist?
Anonymous says
Nothing. This is a tro11
anonM says
+1.
And public schools aren’t what they used to be….as in what? They lack funding and have been attacked as part of the conservative campaign to privatize and profit off of childhood education? Teachers are quitting because of a lack of respect, resources, and undermining of unions? I really conservatives who purposely make public schools worse, send their kids and funds to private schools, and then blame public schools for it.
anon says
I don’t believe any of this. It sounds like you’ve heard random rumors and don’t actually know what’s going on in your public school.
Anonymous says
Oh yeh because the – easily accessible online – syllabi and discipline policies of a county neighboring Washington, DC are made up :) OP asked for opinions and this is mine!
Spirograph says
I wondered if this was MoCo based on your previous comment.
Anon says
Gotta love regional differences. We might end up at private school in TX, bc i want my kids to be exposed to everything.
Spirograph says
It’s fine if you don’t feel like public school is a good fit for your family, but IMO it’s delusional to think you have “control” over what goes on at any school. Sure you may get better customer service at a private school because they want to keep your business, and sure you can be picky about the private school and cherry pick one that seems to align with your family values but… that is not the same as control.
OP, in your situation, I would send my kids to the neighborhood public school. But the bigger question is what you want the school to accomplish for your children. A private school may give more individual attention, focus on particular values that are important to you, and help you and your kids build a network with certain types of people who choose to pay $20k/year+ for elementary school. A public school experience may expose your kids to greater diversity and teach them that the world is a big place that isn’t necessarily going to cater to them, but they’ll be able to find their tribe. You have to decide which is more important to you. I would not factor academics into my decision much for early elementary.
Anonymous says
I posted below and we have had none of this at our public school. It sounds almost made up.
Anonymous says
Yup if you want to make sure your kids are exactly the flavor of bigot you are private is def the way to go.
Anon says
Yeah, “it’s against our family values, which is to be a hateful bigot to young children who aren’t gender conforming.” I just hope the OP’s poor kids end up being straight and cis.
Anonymous says
I would do the neighbourhood public school. We picked public in part because I wanted my kids to interact with a wider range of people vs the typical private school population and our local public was a solid school.
anonM says
+1
School Choice says
Thanks everyone for the perspectives. I’m in Ohio. I’m not really sure how much the public schools reflect the state’s general politics. We have enough support for now but have been handling the schools drop offs and pick ups ourselves. We’re secular Jews but I don’t mind the idea of my kids being more connected to their faith than I was. I didn’t really consider the angle of whether we’d fit in with the parents at that school…
Anon says
Are you in Cincinnati by any chance? I have a family member there who moved her kids from public to a Jewish day school and I could put you in touch.
School Choice says
Thanks for the offer! I’m not in Cincinnati though.
octagon says
If your public schools are decent (based on parent experience, not rankings which may ding a school for other factors), then start there. You can always move to private later. My kid goes to a private because of special needs that our local public can’t adequately meet, and let me tell you I have a zillion things I could do with that tuition money (good thing kiddo is cute).
Former Lit Partner says
Are you 100% sure that you will stay in private practice? If there’s a chance you may want to pivot later on to something else that may not pay as well, factor that in when you’re considering the cost. $23-30k a year (and probably more by the time you get to high school) times two kids times 12 years adds up to a lot of money, even for a relatively high earner.
I say this a former litigation partner who liked my job until I didn’t. I’m not saying that will happen to you, plenty of people obviously stay in private practice their entire career. But it’s something to at least consider.
Anon says
Gosh, private schools are $50-60k per year, plus incidentals.
Former Lit Partner says
This varies a lot regionally and even from school to school, so I was going off of the cost that OP posted above. I agree this probably underestimates the total cost as tuition is likely to go up over time.
Anon says
It varies and I think (?) parochial schools tend to be a bit cheaper. I’m in a Midwest college town and the Catholic school here, which is the best regarded local private school (the others are evangelical Christian schools that don’t teach real science), is only $15k/year. My husband’s parents paid about $20k for his private high school in Ann Arbor, although that was a while ago now. I’m not an expert but $50k feels really high to me for the non-Chicago Midwest.
Anon says
Just googled my husband’s alma mater and it looks like tuition is in the low $30s now. So much more than his parents paid, but still nowhere near $50k.
Anon says
Sorry, no. $30k is still obscene. Anyone paying that to educate their elementary school child should be ashamed of themselves. You’re paying to give your kid a leg up instead of investing in systems that would give every kid a decent education.
None of that’s going to change the people on the website obsessing over how their school district is “ranked” (news flash – those rankings are about how wealthy and white your area is) but it’s also true.
Anon says
My kids are in good but not amazing public schools and it would be a real struggle for us to pay for private school, even the more affordable ones. But I also think it’s important to be precise with language and the difference between $30k/year and $60k/year is huge for most families. If you have two kids and 12 years of private school, that’s a $700k lifetime difference before inflation….not small potatoes to most people. Most private schools are also pretty generous with aid, so the out of pocket cost for most families is typically quite a bit lower than the sticker price. I’m not advocating for private schools here, just saying that in many areas there are a lot of options that cost a lot less than $50-60k.
Anonymous says
So, our private Jewish school has a sticker price of $22k but the only people paying that are those few with household incomes over $300k. We have a very comfortable income and pay $10k which is less than daycare (and the school day is longer meaning we don’t need before/aftercare which we’d have to pay for at public school). And I know we’d be able to stay if I switched to a less well paying job because we’d get more financial aid.
Anonymous says
I’m wondering if you live in my neighborhood. I guess probably not because I can’t think of a boys’ school near here. Our choice is the Jewish school but that is for a lot of reasons beyond strict quality (Jewish identity and community in our very not Jewish area being the big one, another being my older child having some social-emotional issues coupled with advanced academic skills we felt a much smaller school would be better for, plus covid precautions, etc). For me, I would never send kids to a single sex school because my observations in college for kids who had that education really though of the other sex as “other” and had no idea how to relate. Happy to talk about pros/cons of Jewish school if you would like. Our neighborhood school is one of the best in the area but our state is not known for great public schools.
School Choice says
I don’t think we’re in the same area because I’m actually in a very Jewish area. We have five Jewish private schools within about 10 miles. The one I’m considering is the most reform of all of them (and has about 30% secular or non-Jewish families). Would love to hear your perspectives on attending a Jewish school though. My husband and I both went to public schools. My kids are in early childhood in the Jewish school now but it’s very different from the elementary school experience. Their classes are probably 50% non-Jews only because the early childhood choices in this area aren’t great for full time care. It’s generally a wealthy area and a lot of the public schools only offer half day pre-K, if they even offer anything, because of the number of stay at home parents around here.
Anonymous says
I think you might live in my neighborhood. I agonized over this in the summer when my kiddo was about to start kinder. We did not have the Jewish school option, but finally chose the good (not great) public school. It has been a really good experience so far. My kid LOVES school. TBH I think that’s because his teacher praises him and he gets “free iPad time” for good behavior which…is not my favorite but whatever. I just want to say there’s no perfect answer to education. Each choice has upsides and downsides. My kid is of solidly average intelligence with no special needs or accommodations. Those factors might change my answer but probably not.
Anonymous says
Faced this decision in 2021…Here’s what ended up being decisive for us. (1) Research showing that kids who went to school in a diverse environment were more empathetic, creative, and better at critical thinking and problem solving was useful. (2) There’s also good research that for privileged kids, attending a lower-scoring school doesn’t impact their scores. Those articles + societal benefit of public schools + tuition savings made our family’s decision clear.
Anonymous says
Here is an NPR article on the benefits of attending diverse schools for white children that I found helpful: https://www.npr.org/sections/ed/2015/10/19/446085513/the-evidence-that-white-children-benefit-from-integrated-schools
DLC says
I think you can give yourself grace and know that this is not a forever choice. If a private school education seems right for your family and circumstances right now, then do that. You can always put your kids in public school later, or another private school. I think as your kids grow it will become clearer what they need. I say this as a parent whose child won a coveted spot in a public school immersion program and was fine for two years then was miserable. As she got older it became clear that it wasn’t a good fit for her. So this year we moved her to our local public school and she is sooooo much happier.
I’ve totally been where you are now, where when faced with choices, I am paralyzed by all the prospects and the possible ramifications of each option. The best you can do is make the best choice for where your family now and have the willingness to be flexible as life progresses. This might be an unpopular opinion but kindergarten is certainly a big shift, but it is not that big of a deal.
AwayEmily says
I would say start off at the easiest/cheapest option and then you can always switch if it doesn’t meet your needs. My first-grader goes to a public school that is in the bottom 10% in the state in terms of test scores. We went into it figuring that if it didn’t work, we were lucky enough to have the resources to explore other options. It has been an absolutely wonderful experience thus far. I think it’s just really tough to know what will work for your family until you are actually there. A good friend moved to a suburb because the schools were very highly ranked, and then it turned out her kid had special needs and the school was terrible at meeting them, so now they are sending him to the Hebrew day school. I have another friend where one kid goes to the same public school my daughter does, and the other one to a different private school because she has incredibly severe allergies and they felt like the private school handled it better. It’s just hard to predict the match between a kid and school, I think.
anonn says
Yes I think that’s a good idea especially for Kindergartner. We certainly have the means to go to any school we chose, but c’mon paying that much for kinder when the alternative is decent and free!? What in the world? Try it out and put that cash in the college fund. The private schools will be happy to take your money next year.
Anon says
This may be dependent on the school. I know there are some schools that mainly admit students at certain years (K/1 and 6th/7th are the most common entry points) and it’s nearly impossible to get in at other times. Maybe less true in the post Covid era but worth researching you decide to go this route.
Kart says
If you think you’re going to move within the next few years, it basically doesn’t matter where you send them to kindergarten. So I’d just go with the local public school since it’s free and sounds convenient.