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Looking for other washable workwear? See all of our recent recommendations for washable clothes for work, or check out our roundup of the best brands for washable workwear.
Sales of note for 9.10.24
(See all of the latest workwear sales at Corporette!)
- Ann Taylor – 30% off your purchase
- Banana Republic Factory – Up to 50% off everything + extra 20% off
- Boden – 15% off new styles
- Eloquii – $29 and up select styles; up to 50% off everything else
- J.Crew – Up to 50% off wear-to-work styles; extra 30% off sale styles
- J.Crew Factory – 40-60% off everything; extra 60% off clearance
- Lands’ End – 30% off full-price styles
- Loft – Extra 40% off sale styles
- Talbots – BOGO 50% everything, includes markdowns
- Zappos – 26,000+ women’s sale items! (check out these reader-favorite workwear brands on sale, and some of our favorite kids’ shoe brands on sale)
Kid/Family Sales
- Carter’s – Birthday sale, 40-50% off & extra 20% off select styles
- Hanna Andersson – Up to 50% off all baby; up to 40% off all Halloween
- J.Crew Crewcuts – Extra 30% off sale styles
- Old Navy – 40% off everything
- Target – BOGO 25% off select haircare, up to 25% off floor care items; up to 30% off indoor furniture up to 20% off TVs
HSAL says
App recommendations for a 5 year old? I’m on my second kid tonsillectomy of the year and she’ll be home all next week. She has PBS Kids games, Khan Academy, Quick Math Jr, and DisneyNow. Doesn’t need to be educational, just something she’ll enjoy that will keep her occupied. Paid apps are fine.
anon says
MathTango is really good for addition and subtraction. My kids enjoy it.
Think Roll is fun. It’s a problem solving app.
Anonymous says
My 4 yr old really likes Fruit Ninja!
Anonymous says
The Papa’s ___eria (pizzeria, etc.) series of games is a hit with my kid.
Anonymous says
I really want to try Pok Pok (my kids have Fire tablets and it’s not available for those).
anon says
5 YO DD likes Homer
Anon says
My kids love Toca World. They also like drawing apps. For some reason that is more exciting than just getting out the paper and markers. I have Linea Sketch because it was free, but there are a ton out there.
Oh also they like just taking random pictures and making videos.
anon says
Mine loves PlayHome Plus – it’s like a virtual doll house
anon. says
Early 5 or late 5? PBS Kids has so many games – worked well for mine at that age. They also like Teach Your Monster to Read and Endless Reader depending on how late in the 5s.
Anonymous says
We use our tablets for this and it’s technically an app- audiobooks on Libby are a huge hit right now. 5 year old is obsessed with Boxcar Children series.
Anonymous says
Found out a few weeks ago that I am pregnant with my second – due in mid April. I have my first midwife appointment this week, and will ask there as well, but wanted to get some perspective from this board!
I have the opportunity to travel for work to Saudi Arabia in January – I have to say no, right? It will be close to (if not in) the third trimester, and international travel doesn’t seem like a great idea. But – it’s a great career opportunity and if I don’t go, it will get passed to someone at work that I cannot stand. I think I’m having a difficult time separating the feelings about missing out versus dislike of this person. Thoughts about traveling to Saudi Arabia as a women in general are also welcome!
Anonymous says
I wouldn’t go there even if I weren’t pregnant.
Anon says
Yeah, I have a general rule that I don’t go to countries where women can be imprisoned for being raped (not to mention all the other ways they’re oppressed) and where capital punishment is allowable for homosexuality. We need to have some moral standards – anyone who has a choice in travel should not visit these oppressive regimes and American businesses shouldn’t conduct transactions there.
Anonymous says
I wouldn’t consider traveling to Saudi Arabia that pregnant.
Anonymous says
3rd tri international would be a no from me, and I have travelled internationally pregnant before. It’s just too close to the point where you might get stuck in that foreign country.
I am not sure as a woman you would be able to even participate? I have a friend who have travelled to the middle east for work – not KSA, I think it was Oman – and she had to basically sit on the side while her male colleagues present. She couldn’t shake hands. Had to wear a head scarf. etc. Sorta pointless in my opinion.
Anon says
I’m in 3rd trimester now with my second. I don’t even feel like going of state this time around in 3rd tri. Which is so odd because with my first pregnancy 4 years ago, I took cross country flights till 36 weeks for work. It’s weird how comfort levels can change from pregnancy to pregnancy.
I wouldn’t plan on going to Saudi Arabia.
NYCer says
I would not go in your circumstances. That being said, Saudi Arabia is definitely not on my list of places I would *like* to go, but I have two friends (one close friend, one acquaintance) who went there for work, and both said it was fine.
Anonymous says
I would probably go! I love traveling to new places, and assuming general good health and a healthy pregnancy, I wouldn’t turn down an opportunity for work to send me to one. Late second or early third trimester would not have been a deal-breaker for me. I’d do some research on access to medical care where you’ll be traveling, just to have that info at my fingertips, but my understanding is that Riyadh has a very well-developed medical system.
As for general thoughts about traveling there as a woman: I’ve never been to Saudi Arabia, and I know not all mideastern countries are the same, but I enjoyed visiting UAE and Qatar. There are lots of Westerners in major cities, so while I definitely knew I was not in America, it was not difficult or uncomfortable to get around. Obviously learn and be respectful of all cultural norms, dress modestly etc, but I would expect that your hosts/business partners will help you have a good experience. I did not experience racism there as a white person, but a friend I traveled with is Filipino and *did* experience racism; at that time (10+ years ago) there was a large population of Filipino immigrants who primarily worked in low-wage physical labor/domestic labor jobs. The best I can describe is that it was similar to how people in some areas of the US can be very dismissive & derogatory toward people of Latin American heritage.
and congrats and best wishes for a healthy pregnancy and baby!
Anon says
the issue is not just a well developed medical system, but if you deliver early, do you want to be stuck in Saudi Arabia with your child. if the answer is you don’t mind, then go ahead and travel there, but if that would not work out well for you then i’d advise against it
Anonymous says
If I delivered that early, the Saudi Arabia part would not be my biggest concern. But yes, worth at least sketching out a contingency plan for if you decide to go.
Anon says
I don’t know, if you and the premie baby were in Saudi Arabia, the fact that you’re in Saudi Arabia would be a pretty major issue for numerous reasons. (Logistics, healthcare, insurance, travel costs, costs of staying in a foreign country unexpectedly for months.) I wouldn’t minimize this this as it’s a very real concern.
Anonymous says
Yeah—how would you even get the baby home? You would have to get a passport, which these days takes months.
Anon says
You can expedite a passport in an emergency, and get it within a week. That would be very low on my list of concerns about visiting Saudi Arabia while pregnant.
GCA says
Hmm, I also love traveling (I live literally halfway around the world from the country where I grew up) and learning about new cultures, and have been to Dubai and Qatar for work, but I personally would err on the side of no.
Here’s my mental calculus:
1. In OP’s shoes I think that my own participation in the trip, or not, would probably have a negligible effect in terms of sending any sort of signal about working with a repressive regime. Citizens of repressive regimes chafe about this too and are often just doing the best they can to survive in one. So that wouldn’t really be a major factor in my decision, UNLESS I was someone with real decision-making and signal-sending power. C-suite in a global company or major international non-government org, that sort of thing.
2. The race and labor issues would be a factor for me, I’m personally very uncomfortable with what amounts to indentured servitude because of my upbringing (there are similar systems in wealthy Asian countries like Hong Kong and Singapore).
3. Access to high-quality medical care would be an issue for me; if something goes wrong, the doctor would have to make a very difficult call about whether termination is necessary to save your life or if termination is ‘just’ for your physical or mental health.
4. Cost of high-quality medical care overseas could also be an issue – in a worst-case scenario you are paying out of pocket for a long hospital stay for yourself and the baby.
5. On gender, not personally but professionally – I would consider whether my participation as a woman would help or hinder the organization’s business objectives. (Minor factor. If you’re the best person for the job, obviously you go.)
6. Finally, long-distance international travel would have been pretty physically uncomfortable for me that far along in pregnancy. I did a four hour flight one pregnancy and that was enough.
Anon says
UAE and Qatar are VERY different than Saudi Arabia though. I’ve been to both Dubai and Doha for tourism, but would be very hesitant to travel to Saudi Arabia even not pregnant. Just because they’re in the same general region doesn’t mean they’re the same.
Fwiw Saudi Arabia is a level 3 country per US State Dept, i.e., “reconsider travel,” and they don’t give our Level 3 warnings lightly (the vast majority of countries are level 1 or 2).
Anon says
Biased opinion- I just gave birth to my second and had 2 unexpected hospitalizations during this pregnancy. Both were for “minor” things (UTI and food poisoning/dehydration), came out of nowhere and I had uncomplicated pregnancies. It sucks, but I’d say no.
Anon says
I will never go to Saudi Arabia as a woman, even not pregnant, but I especially won’t go pregnant. I also won’t go to U.S. states that have banned abortion while pregnant, for work or otherwise. I won’t put my life at risk for that and I also won’t spend my money there. I’m pregnant now and will miss a work trip to the south as a result, but it’s not worth it.
anon says
The hardest of hard passes.
I’m 28 weeks pregnant and don’t want to leave my immediate area right now – after a swimmingly easy first pregnancy, this one is just … not that. You have no idea what this pregnancy holds and it’s not a risk I would take whatsoever (and I’m someone who drinks wine and eats deli meat in pregnancy, fwiw).
Anonymous says
You would be insane to go on this trip. If something happens and you’re stuck there, who will take care of your first child while your husband travels to Saudi Arabia to help you navigate what might be months of medical care? Plus the political situation, plus the language barrier, plus women’s rights. Hard hard pass.
Misha Nonoo, the fashion designer, gave birth to her second in her second trimester while on a trip and had to spend months in the random city where her teeny baby was in the ICU.
Emma says
I went to Europe at 27 weeks, so I don’t necessarily object to travelling while pregnant, but I was comfortable with my ability to get medical care and make choices in my country of destination, which won’t necessarily be the case in Saudi Arabia? I know very little about SA, but will note travelling that late in pregnancy was ok but honestly pretty miserable. I went because it was my best friend’s wedding and we made a babymoon out of it, but expect to be tired, very sensitive to heat, and that’s when my feet started to swell exponentially, possibly from too much exercise and heat or maybe just normal pregnancy stuff, but it was my turning point between the surge of energy of the second trimester and the significant fatigue and wanting it to be over of the third trimester.
Emma says
Woops – nesting fail, this was for the Saudi Arabia question above.
Mountain Mama says
Another travel/pregnancy question. I have to go to Paris for a weeklong business trip in early November. I’ll be 20 weeks pregnant. Suggestions on where to buy maternity business clothes/combos to pack? DS was born during Covid so I didn’t have to buy any maternity clothes for work and current job is business casual/jeans ok so I also don’t need to go crazy buying for that.
Anonymous says
I’d take dresses and existing non-maternity blazers you already own. Most of my maternity dresses came from Motherhood Maternity or Target. Not sure MM still exists?
Vicky Austin says
It does!
Pajamas says
I recommend getting maternity clothes secondhand – FB marketplace or local FB moms groups, or consignment shops.
Emma says
When you’re in Paris, Envie de Fraises has cute maternity stuff (although it’s more casual than business). There is also a Seraphine store in the 6th next to Saint Sulpice church. Seraphine, Ingrid & Isabel, and Gap have decent choices for maternity office wear.
Pajamas says
This top looks like pajamas.
CCLA says
My first thought exactly
Anon says
Agreed
Spirograph says
I didn’t see it at first, but now I can’t un-see it. I even had Pjs with this piping & shape, only purple
Anon says
Reposting on the Moms board based on advice I got yesterday. Currently building my baby registry – what are your must have items for a first time mom? What is overhyped that we can skip? Due in March. Appreciate any tips!
Anonymous says
Best advice I got was don’t over-invest in a Stroller if you are planning on more kids. We got a just fine stroller (like, $150 not $1500) and by the time my first was 18 months old I was pregnant again. We bought a double and spent the bigger money on that one which we used again with my 3rd and only sold when my 3rd turned 5 (my kids would still ride in it if I let them!).
Anon says
I only have one kid, but still glad I didn’t invest in a fancy stroller. My cheapo stroller worked just fine.
Anon says
In contrast, our $1k stroller was worth the money fast despite only one kid. We live in the city, with lots of bumpy brick and cobblestone sidewalks. We use it to go to school daily and long walks every weekend day (and every day during parental leave). That thing was down to costing us cents per mile within a year and handles much much better in the snow and on the bumps, grass, and dirt paths than the Chico, Graco, and Mockingbird strollers my friends got. The point is not that the posters above are wrong, but rather like said by someone else below: really think about your life and needs. Our kid is in a car once a month, if that, and has never lived in a home with more than 1k square feet. We have a totally different set of faves than people with a single family house in the suburbs!
Boston Legal Eagle says
Same. We lived in a close in suburb/city lite for my kids’ first few years. The UppaBaby Cruz was golden for getting around the city. We walked it to and from and daycare and walked all around, with minimal driving. If we had started in the suburbs, I might think differently.
Anon says
Yeah I think strollers and carriers are very lifestyle dependent
New Here says
Don’t register for a ton of pacis or swaddles because you don’t know what they will like.
One the same note – we loved the Halo swaddle and then the Halo sleep sacks.
Hatch light is great.
We only used a bottle warmer for a little bit. She got tired of waiting on it.
We registered for am umbrella stroller but rarely used it. This could be because she was born at the end of 2019 and basically a pandemic baby – we didn’t go anywhere.
When we did, we loved our BOB stroller.
The Skip Hop 3-in-1 Activity Center was GREAT. I bought it used off FB Marketplace but if I had it to do over again, I would register for it. She used it from 4/5 months until over 2 years (as a table). We even bought a second for my parents’ house.
Vicky Austin says
If I had it all to do over, I would get the electric baby nail file. The clippers are a PITA and the regular baby nail file they sent us home from the hospital with was ineffective.
We plan to have more kids, so I haven’t been too upset if something doesn’t work for DS. Smaller-ticket items like the Hatch that are super baby-specific are great gifts for Great Aunt Whoever to send you and feel important about, and not a huge deal to stick in a closet if baby turns out to be a white-noise hater. Your mileage may vary.
If you’re going through Babylist, the “boxes” for different types of bottles and pacifiers (and some other things too?) were AMAZING. DS wasn’t super picky about these things, but if he had been, it would have been so easy to just try a different one for a few days and see if it helped. Highly, highly recommend.
Whatever your feeding regimen, get a drying rack and a dishwasher basket. Munchkin or OXO make good ones. Tossing things in the dishwasher when possible just makes the mental labor of parts-cleaning that much easier, but you’ll want a drying rack for the random times when you have a single bottle to wash, or something.
Finally – highly individual of course, but I had an end-of-March baby in Texas and I don’t think he’s worn socks more than 3 times in his life, so all the teeny tiny baby socks are still rolled into the little sock donuts I took so much time over when I was pregnant. Hah. So consider the weather you’re likely to get while baby is a newborn and don’t register for clothes you don’t need!
Abby says
Congrats! My baby is 4 months old and here is what I love so far: Snoo (pricey, but worth it to me. Especially middle of the night I don’t worry about rocking her back to sleep, I just put her down and the snoo does the work), Keekaroo changing pad (wipeable vs not using a changing pad cover), Lovevery gym, sensory strands, and play kits (we use them every day multiple times a day. It is amazing how spot on they are with what baby is interested in at certain ages), portable sound machine, ubbi diaper pail (so far no smell), eufy baby monitor (love that it’s not wifi based), electric nail filer, wipes dispenser (I didn’t think I’d need this, but if you pull wipes straight from the container, it’s hard to grab just one)
If you’re hoping to breastfeed: Nursing bras from Auden, Boon Trove (instead of Haaka to collect milk on the other side when feeding), Silverette nursing cups (I swear I healed overnight)
Things I wouldn’t register for: clothes (people gift so many), muslin blankets (gifted a ton), teethers (gifted), booties/socks/mittens (with footies that fold over, we never needed any), bottles/pacifiers (when you create registries they offer a free welcome bag – get them! We got an assortment of bottles and pacifiers for free and could try them on baby to see which one she liked best),
Anon says
-Hatch
-Keekaroo peanut changer ( or other changer that is made of plastic and can be wiped down)
– some kind of seat to put the baby in (baby bjorn bouncer is popular)
– a portable changing pad (skip hop one is good)
– diaper pail.
– for high chair either go cheap with ikea, or fancy with stokke tripp trapp (we went with ikea for our twins, but then bought two tripp trapps second hand once we moved into a house and if you have the space i’d go with them now, my twins are 5 and sit on the chairs).
– agree with Halo sleep sacks or woolino, which is expensive, but long so you don’t have to keep getting new ones
– i did not bother registering for things like pacifiers (stole some from the hospital and my kids only used briefly and these are cheap and easy to order), wish i hadn’t registered for towels bc each kid received 6 personalized ones as gifts
honestly i loved Lucie’s List, which I learned about from this board and used it to make my registry. also, there is lots of stuff you can buy, but don’t need. we started out in a one bedroom apartment with our twins, which forced me to be minimalist, which was a blessing in disguise (though i would not advise living in a one bedroom apartment with twins if possible)
Anon says
This is spot on. Follow this.
Anon says
Second everything on this list, especially the Ikea/Tripp Trapp high chair assessment. I’ll also add to not worry about the stroller too much. Maybe don’t even buy one right now, depending on your lifestyle, until you figure out what you really want. We babywore on walks for months and barely used the stroller. We ended up with three strollers: a jogger, a lightweight, and a mid-sized stroller. We almost never use the mid-sized stroller, which I expected to be our daily stroller.
Anon says
Yes to all of this! Will add a few more of our faves:
– Uppababy Vista (I go on long walks over very uneven terrain for my sanity, this was a must have. Husband says it has better shock absorption than our cars)
– FP baby bath 3 in 1 thing
– Lovevery play gym
If you travel:
– Pack n Play
– SlumberPod. By far my favorite baby gear item
– Uppababy Minu
Anonymous says
I posted yesterday, but you will get a lot of conflicting recommendations, so take some time to think about the way you operate, how your house is set up (single story or two story) and what your neighborhood/living situation is like.
For example, we just got the uppa baby Cruz stroller (the one that doesn’t convert to a two-seater). We don’t have any other strollers, have traveled with this stroller in the car and on upwards of two dozen plane trips, etc. I had so many (very well intentioned) people tell me to get a “cheap travel stroller” and also get a “good jogging stroller” in addition to the Cruz, and I heard this so often that I spent a good amount of time looking into this. However, I don’t jog for exercise, I live in a walkable neighborhood with good sidewalks, this stroller has been great, and I’ve never once thought “I wish I had a second stroller”. To me, the Cruz is heavy duty enough to go over the occasional sidewalk bump on unfamiliar sidewalks, and I have never found it cumbersome for airplane travel (which we do a lot). But if you live in an apartment and space is at a premium or will be walking down several flights of stairs or your sidewalks are terrible or maybe you do jog, then keep that in mind.
I also got (either registered or passed down to me) every single baby wearing device you could imagine. I used one of them (the egro baby) exactly twice. My child was born on Memorial Day and I live in the south. The last thing I needed was another human pressed directly next to me, even inside with A/C! I was happy to have the wrap/carrier options, I just didn’t use them.
My only other recommendation is to get a few wrap style onesies. As a first time mom, I was really nervous about pulling anything over my tiny child’s head. With the wrap style onesies, I could lay my child on top of them to put them on and I found it worlds easier.
Anon says
Rather than buying tons of stuff, just make a list of the things you read about and think you might want. There’s almost nothing that can’t be shipped to you in 12-48 hours. Buy the bare minimum now. If something works for you (e.g., bottles, swaddle, diapers, burp rags, booties, sleepers, etc) then you can always order more. There’s no need to stock your house like a baby store. Just get one of what you think you’ll need immediately and see how it goes.
As an example, I ended up with a huge oversupply and ended up using gobs of breast pads. But my baby rarely spit up or drooled so I never used a bib and only had a few burp cloths. By contrast, my friend switched to bottle feeding early on so didn’t need pads and had a spitter and needed tons of burp cloths and bibs. You just don’t know, so save your pennies and order what you end up needing.
CCLA says
-Reverse zip footed sleepers (target cloud island brand makes these, they are so much easier for diaper changes)
-places to put baby down safely; I had something in every space we used regularly so I didn’t have to cart the baby container from room to room, and similarly multiple places to change diapers if you have two stories or a very spread out house
-pumping bra – when I first got to pumping at the hospital when baby wouldn’t latch well, I was very not thrilled about having to hold the flanges up to my chest while sitting in the hospital bed. 0/10 recommend.
-a stash of formula with a bottle even if you’re not FF, just for emergencies (or my personal hero for the early days since I mostly formula fed, the pre-mixed 2oz bottles with disposable attachable n!pples)
-box cutter…sort of kidding, but really, you’ll open so many more boxes, and like someone said above, most things are quickly available and even if you stock up you’ll inevitably find you need more/different stuff
Cerulean says
Instead of a pumping bra, I loved the Bravado pumping band that converts any nursing bra to a pumping bra. I loved mine and was glad to not have to get one for pumping.
Anonymous says
+1 to Cloud Island. I love them. Good quality for the price.
Anon says
Yeah we bought a lot of those little 2 oz bottles but so worth it!!
Cerulean says
I had a very pared down registry. Keep in mind that if you truly need something, you can get it shipped in two days (or same-day for many areas and items). We went cheap or lower midrange on most items (IKEA high chair and the Sniglar crib were two purchases I really liked) and splurged only on our Uppababy Cruz, which we love (like another poster, we don’t have any other strollers. Cheap ones absolutely get the job done, but I like that it handles like a dream and we spent so little on everything else that the cost was NBD for us. Plus it holds value if you want to resell it later.)
I loved the Babybjorn Mini for a very user-friendly carrier for the first months, and since our kid was very over being worn around eight months I’m glad we didn’t get anything that was more expensive or cumbersome. I would avoid getting multiples of anything like pacis, carriers, bottles, or swaddles where babies tend to have a strong preference. Just get one type, see if you like it, and then buy a different brand if it doesn’t work out. Two day shipping!
I registered for one super cute coming home from the hospital outfit and otherwise mostly put our winter baby in the footed sleepers with convertible mittens from Target (Cloud Island brand) and Old Navy so we didn’t have to deal with baby socks or anything else.
anonM says
If one is near you, go to a children’s resale shop. The one near our house sells so many gently used things that can be easily cleaned/sanitized (at least to my standards, YMMV) – baby bath, pack n play, swing, bouncers, extra crib sheets, different types of swaddles, baby carriers, etc. It could at least give you an idea of what you could easily and cheaply pick up later if you change your mind. And, as others have noted, it depends a lot on your baby and your home/lifestyle, so you could buy some things and see how baby likes it, but even a baby that uses the swing a lot is only doing so for a few months. Things I kind of wish I’d bought the first time around — trip trap highchair or something similar, a really quality kids table, stainless steel kids plates. Also, for swaddles I love the zippered swaddleme newborn pods. No middle of the night velcro-ing, you just zip them in. As for skipping – the fancy baby monitors. We ditched the video cam and the under-the-mattress gadget that promised to monitor baby’s breathing. It made me way too anxious. YMMV of course, but throwing it out there that these gadgets are not requirements. Must have- if you are planning to at least try breastfeeding, the gel nipple pads (Lansinoh, Soothies Cooling Gel Pads). Good luck!
Anon says
Things I kind of rolled my eyes at but ended up being workhorses: ubbi diaper pail (we bought one for each floor), boppy pillow, bum brush, love to dream swaddle. I also love the unisex sleeper gowns for nighttime. Would also recommend somewhere to set the baby down on each story- we just use a travel bassinet. The rest of the advice you’ve gotten is super solid- agree about considering your lifestyle regarding the stroller (for what it’s worth- I love our Mockingbird), think variety in terms of pacifiers/bottles/swaddles and then stock up on what works for your baby, don’t bother registering for blankets or towels.
Anon says
I’m 34 weeks pregnant and have two questions. First, what should I do before the baby is born? The baby’s room is all set up, I have diapers and clothing, the bassinet is set up. The car seat still needs to be installed, but I otherwise feel ready to bring the baby home. I’ve been trying to do fun things that will be hard to find time for after the baby is born. Any other recommendations?
Second, I have a 20 week leave and want to have some ideas for things to do out of the house once I’m ready for that. Does anyone have recommendations for baby activities or groups I should look into? I’m in DC, if anyone has local suggestions.
Anon says
How’s your postpartum support situation? Do you know where you’ll go for lactation consultation (if applicable) and who you’ll call first if you experience depression? Have you considered a doula? What about freezer meals? Since you have the nursery/baby side well covered, I’d use this time to think of yourself and what will make this easier for you.
Vicky Austin says
+1 to all this, and also go to the movies and get pedicures.
Anonymous says
Highly recommend the DC breastfeeding center if you end up needing lactation support!
Anon says
Fall is a great time to be on maternity leave in the DC area, I think… just being outside is lovely- there are so many places and parks to just sit and enjoy the cooler weather and then when the weather is not so great, there are so many museums, most of them free. When I was on maternity leave, a friend and I went to visit all the museums that we could, even the lesser known ones like the Frederick Douglas House and the Lincoln Cottage. (Though those two are probably easier if you wear the baby rather than trying to get the stroller up and down stairs).
The AFI in Silver Spring also has baby-friendly matinees.
Does your hospital or pediatrician have a new parent support group? The one I joined was invaluable. Our hospital also offered post partum exercise classes which I liked, but sadly they no longer do that.
Spirograph says
+1 to all of this, especially the baby-friendly matinees at AFI Silver Spring, I went to several of these!
My hospital had a new-moms group and I really enjoyed the temporary friendships I made there. We did a lot of walks/picnics in various parks, get-togethers at someone’s house, etc. Otherwise, I’d just do whatever you’d want to do without a baby! Infants are very portable. With a good stroller / baby wearing device, just go enjoy the museums, quiet reading at a coffee shop, leisurely errands, etc
DC Urban Moms board has its share of listserv drama, but it can also be a place to connect, so worth checking out.
Anon says
i hope someone from DC chimes in because I know there is a fabulous group there for new moms. if you like going to the movies, go to the movies now, lay in bed and binge watch a show, get a pedicure. if you’re someone who likes to stock your freezer with meals you can do that, get some snacks (granola bars, etc.) that are easy for you to eat with one hand. basically you’ve done much more than i did before bringing home my twins, so you’ll be fine. try to stay calm/patient which is easier said than done.
Anon says
i texted my friend in DC, she said P.A.C.E. is what she did with her first and Petworth Peanuts with her second.
Anon says
+100000000 to PACE. My kid is 5 and I still get together with my group
Anonymous says
Takoma Mamas free newborn support group used to meet at the Takoma DC library . Not sure if it’s still around but it was a total lifesaver for me.
Anona says
It is! There’s a TKPK FB group when they post to get on the list for each new cohort.
Abby says
If possible, stock up on freezer food, pantry items, household items, personal care items. I didn’t want to worry about running out of paper towel or conditioner while PP. If you’re nursing, prep for nursing bras and nursing friendly outfits, (this one completely slipped my mind) sanitize bottles/pump parts, Vitamin D supplements (suggested by our ped). Buy extra thank you cards. PP diapers (for you). Pelvic Floor Therapist if you’re interested – mine had a long wait to get an appointment, I wish I had reached out before baby was born.
I thought I would be out and about with the baby all the time during my leave, and I had a hard time balancing signing up for too much and feeling like my maternity leave was being wasted away. I’d look for things you can do on a whim vs at a scheduled time. It was stressful for me to make a 10 am appointment because of baby napping and feeding schedule, vs knowing I could go do something whenever she was done eating
anon says
Wash/sanitize your pump parts and pack a pumping bra for the hospital.
I didn’t intend to pump until much, much later but DD was born with pretty bad jaundice and had to be formula fed at the hospital and for the first couple days at home to help flush her system. As such, I had to pump immediately and was woefully unprepared. I didn’t even know where I had stashed the pump at the time.
Also, go to some movies – Barbie and Oppenheimer, if those are your jam or you want to know what the fuss is about. Movies were not top of priority list once we brought baby home and also found time for ourselves sans child for…. a lot of years ;)
Anon says
Haircut! Consider a massage if that’s your jam. Would also do ALL the date nights with your partner that you can. The relationship really does change with kids (in amazing ways too! Just would definitely soak up the “two of us” while you can).
Anon says
I wish OP an easy delivery and recovery.
Just writing to say — everyone’s journey is so different, so don’t feel like you “have” to do anything after baby arrives except take care of yourself and baby (and get whatever help you need to so do).
I had DS #1 in the DC-Area and the two BF group meetings at my hospital sent me in huge anxiety spiral – and added to my then-undiagnosed PPA/D. Getting out of the apartment, let alone coordinating with others, often seemed daunting to me. I was on leave from Thanksgiving-Mid March, so I didn’t even feel like taking walks after the early days and then the tail end of my leave.
Anon says
Your local recreation center and library are great places to go with little ones and often have groups and resources for new moms.
What to do now? Don’t put too much pressure on yourself. Just line up some enjoyable activities, take some extra naps or date nights, read a book or watch TV shows, grab brunch with a friend. Fill up your freezer with easy meals.
Anonymous says
Haircut is a great idea. I also got a pedicure because when my feet looked like sausages at least my toes looked nice.
RE: activities, I did a breastfeeding group at GW which was good for getting out of the house a couple of times but stopped going because it ultimately felt really shame-y and not actually that helpful. I still think of the one moderator sometimes and how awful she was. In theory I wanted to meet friends for lunch, but the few times I did it I felt really stressed out about not being late, public transportation, etc. Things that I loved- walks in the neighborhood, baby friendly matinees (check out Angelika), and the “little snugglers” program at the botanic garden if they have brought that back. Smithsonian had some baby programs too called Bring Your Own Baby that is like a mini museum tour that might be worth checking out- the one I did was pretty good. And remember the more you get out of the house, the easier it is, although it can be really daunting at first.
Momofthree says
Yes, PACE is great. I did it with all of my kids. The only downside may be if they’re still totally virtual. You could meet with the group members outside of PACE regardless (they do try to have people who live in similar areas). It’s a meeting for 1st time moms + a social worker to lead the group.
Anjelika movie theaters (Union Market & Mosaic District in VA) used to have Cry Baby Matinees.
Stroller Strides can be a nice way to meet people once you up & about. Circle Yoga has postpartum yoga which is much more about being around other moms & babies than it is yoga. Mr. Mike’s music class has a class for infants- which might be a nice way to meet parents.
There are storytimes at all of the DC libraries. Also, your local listserv can be great for meeting new moms.
I think though it’s more a question of what the purpose of the activity is- if you’re looking to meet other parents, that’s 1 thing. If you’re just trying to get out of the house, I’d focus on doing the things you want to do, whether that’s be in a park, go to an art museum, go to a library, etc. If you’re hoping to do something for baby’s general enrichment, it’s not going to really make a difference at that age, so I wouldn’t worry about this.
Anon Anon says
Since we’re doing pregnant travel today, here’s another thorny Q: I have an in-law family wedding in Texas when I will be almost exactly 20 weeks pregnant. This is my first pregnancy, and my mom had quite a lot of trouble carrying to term so I am on high alert for similar issues. I am worried I won’t be able to get adequate medical care if something happens while I’m there. I’m leaning towards flying in Saturday morning, attending the wedding, then leaving Sunday morning so I’m there for barely 24 hours. Am I crazy to go? Or am I paranoid? Would appreciate input from the group.
Anon says
I would go and probably not try for such a compressed travel schedule unless you’d prefer it anyway – it seems exhausting. Certainly talk to your OB about your concerns, but if they do not think you are high risk I see no reason why you couldn’t fly.
Anon Anon says
FWIW I’m not all that worried about the compressed travel – I live in a hub city with direct flights, and I have status from work travel so I get bigger seats and upgrades. Flying Saturday morning will probably guarantee me an upgrade, actually.
Anon says
I meant it more in terms of maybe you might not want to have to get up early in the morning and rush around, maybe there’s brunch to go to or whatnot. But if you’re a morning person or don’t really want to hang around, then maybe that’s your answer I guess something to think about is that if you’re going to fly there anyway, does it really make a difference if you spend an additional 8 or so hours there?
Anon says
I wouldn’t go to any anti-abortion state while pregnant if I didn’t absolutely have to. It’s not safe and you’re correct that you won’t be able to get adequate medical care if something happens (this is what I call a “low-risk, high-consequence” situation). Use the pregnancy as an excuse to skip the wedding. Family will understand.
Betsy says
After being very black and white about risk during Covid, I am personally trying to be more measured in evaluating risks and rewards now. Do you actually want to go to this wedding? If not, totally use pregnancy as a reason to get out of it. But if you actually want to go, I would put some thought into how you would handle an emergency while there, and absolutely plan on cancelling if your pregnancy becomes riskier between now and then.
Anon says
I love this take on a lot of levels.
This says
This would be my take as well.
Spirograph says
Do you want to go to the wedding, or are you only considering it because you feel obligated to go? If you want to go, I would RSVP yes but reserve final decision until closer to the date, based on your health, in consultation with your OB. If you don’t want to go, politely decline and blame your OB for recommending against it due to your higher-risk pregnancy. Don’t cite concerns about access to health care specifically unless you’re very confident the family will be receptive and understanding. I know a lot of my extended family in TX that would give a hearty eyeroll to that excuse and gossip about it for years afterward. I wouldn’t do your quick-turn trip, that just sounds exhausting and un-fun.
Anon says
yes if you decline blame it on your OB.
Anon says
Counterpoint, it’s good for relatives to be exposed to this natural consequence. There’s no reason this decision-making should hide in the shadows – women who do not feel comfortable traveling to anti-abortion states shouldn’t have to lie about that being the reason. What’s a little gossip compared to the power that is correctly identifying misogyny and speaking the truth about your fears? The experiences and fears of close friends/relatives can actually change minds and voting patterns.
anon says
Agree! I don’t feel comfortable going to TX because of their anti-women, anti-choice laws should an emergency arise with my pregnancy.
Anon says
Just a friendly reminder there are plenty of people in red states (I’m in TX) who are pro-abortion, so I don’t get the “natural consequences” take for the relatives. We’re not all gun-wielding, anti-woman, anti-science folks here.
Our state leadership is all of those things I wrote above, though.
Anon says
Right, but presumably relatives who would gossip and jeer at OP for years to come don’t fall into that category.
Spirograph says
Presumably the hosts live in or have close family ties to TX. They’re having a wedding where they have roots and inviting people in good faith to come and celebrate with them, not choosing an anti-choice locale on purpose. As anon at 12:57 says, there are many people in TX who neither voted for the state leaders nor agree with these laws, and not everyone who disagrees can move away. Wedding planning is often a stressful time, and what you’re proposing could easily be interpreted as criticizing the hosts for choosing that location. It’s not only impolite, it has a good chance of causing a much bigger swirl with lasting impacts on family dynamics than it would if you brought it up at a more neutral time. If it’s close family, you can talk about your experiences and fears with them later. If it’s not close family, I’d take family peace over the slim chance you’ll change anyone’s mind.
Anonymous says
+1 to this answer. I’m 24 weeks pregnant and my mom lives in Dallas. I have not visited her since getting pregnant because I want to make sure I have all the options for my own medical care if something (low chance but bad consequences) were to happen. However it’s been fine because I don’t like visiting Dallas anyway and my mom has been more than happy to just come visit us in Oregon so it’s been totally friction free. She is considering moving to be closer to us and the only grand baby anyway and totally understood why I was leery about visiting. sooo if you are super excited about this wedding, I would go and just keep it to a short trip. If you are meh about the wedding and travel anyway then I’d say use the reason and skip it and have a nice weekend at home to yourself :)
Colette says
I would decline. It just does not seem worth the risk.
anon says
I would not go to TX (or any other anti-choice state) pregnant. Hard line. Especially considering family history. Especially for an in-law wedding.
Anon says
I wouldn’t go.
anon says
I would go as long as it’s proximate to a major city. I’m 28 weeks and headed to Houston at 31 weeks for about 27 hours. My conservative doctor (also in MFM / high risk pregnancy) said it’s fine but go and come right home. Risk isn’t the flight/cabin pressurization, it’s what happens if there’s an issue while you’re there. The shorter the duration of the trip, the less chance something happens when you’re there. I have a friend who delivered at ~26 weeks in rural VA visiting family at Christmas and stayed there until March or April – horrible from a logistics and medical standpoint as she was about 4 hours from the major hospital, so couldn’t even easily crash at her parent’s house overnight. But, theoretically, as long as you’re near a major medical system, you’re medically fine (logistically is another issue). Doctor, on the other hand, did not want me to go to a flyover state’s secondary city to visit my MIL in my third trimester because of lack of medical care.
As far as the abortion issue, at 20 weeks I personally wouldn’t be as concerned as if I was like 5-12 weeks. I have a history of MCs and ectopic, and immediate access to abortion care is critical at that stage because the odds of issues are way, way more elevated. I wouldn’t go see family in FL or GA in my first trimester. My doc said it wasn’t as much of a concern for her at this stage of my current pregnancy, especially with a short in/out type trip.
That all said, everyone’s risk tolerance is different. It’s entirely up to you and whatever you decide is a-ok. Definitely no one right answer.
Anon says
I live in an anti-abortion state (less so than Texas), and I think your concern is fair. I also think of this in the opposite– if I traveled to California or most European countries while pregnant and had some issue come up, I would probably get better medical treatment than I would at home.
Anon says
I’m not sure I agree with your last sentence. I also live in an anti-choice state (though less so than Texas) but I think there’s something to be said for being with your regular health care providers who know you and know your history and will advocate for you. I was nervous traveling while pregnant even to pro-choice places because I didn’t have my regular doctors nearby.
Anonymous says
Regular doctors can’t help much if they don’t have legal authority to provide you with all recommended options.
Anon says
Yes, but not every health issue for a pregnant woman will end in termination even if it’s an option. A very very small percentage of them will, actually. In all the other scenarios you’d be better off with your regular doctor.
anon says
My OB told me that the risk was in the takeoff and landing and to space flights out (she also told me that grapes weren’t safe to eat, so take this with a grain of salt – I chose to believe her on the risk of flight aspect and not on the grapes part). That said, I was flying to a major city (I was 36 weeks pregnant) and fully willing to give birth there, so that’s different from what sounds like a smaller town in Texas.
3T clothes says
I have a 3 year old boy, and at 3T, we’ve just sized out of most of his hand-me-downs. I expect we will still find some here and there, but it seems like kids grow slower and are harder on clothes at this age, so we will inevitably need to buy some new. Any tips for budgeting for seasonal clothes and shoes? Any sales you’re eyeing over Labor Day?
anon says
I love target’s cat & jack line. Very affordable and holds up well. If your kid is like my 3yo, he only wants to wear the same 5 bottoms/tops on repeat so it shouldn’t be too expensive to stock up a basic wardrobe.
I also tend to take a gamble and buy end of season clothes in the next size up. So right now I’m stocking up on 4t summer shorts/tees just in case for next year. Can’t beat $3 shorts
Anon says
Agree with Target Cat & Jack. Very affordable and they hold up well.
Anonie says
A good middle ground between direct hand me downs and brand new IMO is Goodwill. I’ve been able to find plenty of clothes there in like-new condition, or at least acceptable condition, for my kids, and in my area, items on sale are literally $1 each. FB marketplace is also a good place to get hand me downs in decent condition for a buck or two per item. Since little kids destroy their clothes so easily, I can’t quite stomach paying full price, even at Target. (Not to mention the environmental benefits of buying used.)
Anonymous says
Definitely Facebook – there is a neighborhood parents’ group that is more reliable for me than marketplace overall. Buy Nothing as well. I definitely found there weren’t too many good size 4-6 clothes at goodwill bc kids thst age are hard on clothes, but it’s a bit better now again in larger sizes. Otherwise, Target, Children’s Place winter coats, H&M undies and actually just H&M overall.
More Sleep Would Be Nice says
I tuned into Best of Both Worlds recently after a break. Did anyone listen to the ep on ending your workday? If so, what were your thoughts? I know there are a variety of folks here that work different schedules. I thought it was interesting (to me) that they kind of framed it based on a very cut-and-dry 40-hour workweek.
I have to logon after kid bedtime at least a few times a week, and sometimes it’s because I had to attend to personal stuff (e.g. kid appointment, appointment for me, etc.) during the workday, but often it’s just the flow of the day (too many meetings, other deliverables come up, limited heads down time). I know this is a workplace/workload issue, but I also know this situation – logging on outside of “business hours” – is not the exception based on my conversations with all of my friends (kids and childfree).
Momofthree says
I 100% work most nights after I get the kids to bed. It’s probably 3-4 nights each week. Weekends its almost unheard of though I have in the past taken time to pick my kids up from school in the afternoon so hopefully I won’t have to work late as often now that we have someone picking them up.
The reality of having a flexible job is that I can take time in the middle of the day for whatever I need to (including making dinner, doctors appointments, school conferences, etc.) but then I have to make that work up at some point and it’s often in the evening. I’m also more of a night person though, so that may be driving part of it.
GCA says
I haven’t listened to BOBW for a long time, but I definitely work most nights after kid bedtime, or get up very early to get focused work done in the hours when no one else is making demands of any sort of my time. That’s the nature of any job in which workflows and demands aren’t cut-and-dried, I think. (I am all for firm boundaries and regular, predictable schedules for hourly labor!)
Anon says
Pre-kids I would often do some work on nights and weekends, partly because I didn’t have that many demands on my free time and partly because I’d often fritter away time during the workday chatting with co-workers or playing solitaire so there was an element of needing to play catch-up. Post-kids, I’m very protective of my nights and weekends and basically never work outside of normal business hours. I’m more focused on actually working during work hours.
I do feel like it’s pretty rare for exempt white collar workers to never log on after 5 pm, and it’s one of a couple reasons I plan to stay in my otherwise blah job for as long as I can.
Anonymous says
I started a new job a few weeks ago that will offer more opportunities for growth and will be a bit more demanding than my last position. Demanding as in I’ll actually have to be in the office a few days per week instead of nearly fully remote. I’ve now realized that the adjustment period for both me and my family to get in the groove with the new routine is going to take longer than I anticipated. In the meantime, I feel a ton of guilt and like I made a huge mistake. I am stressed and sad. And I just need to tell people who will understand.
Anon says
you made this decision for a reason. sounds like there is some short term pain, for hopefully long term gain.
transitions are hard. especially when there are other people involved. try not to look backwards as that doesn’t really accomplish anything. if in 6 months it feels like a mistake you can reevaluate, but in the meantime thing about what you can do/streamline to make your life easier