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strollerstrike says
Good morning!
Does anyone in the hive have any tips for Paris with a toddler (3 year old boy? Any recs for restaurants, activities etc. would be very much appreciated.
Anon says
Jardin du Luxembourg is amazing for that age. I’d try to stay near there if you can. Bateaux Mouches boat ride on the Seine is fun for the whole family. My daughter did surprisingly well in art museums for brief periods of time at age 3, so don’t be afraid to go to a museum or two (my favorite is Musee D’Orsay). Worst case is your kid throws a tantrum and you leave and have wasted the admission fee. Shopping for kids clothes at Le Bon Marche probably won’t be a highlight for your kid, but was fun for me. I feel like with a 3 year old, if you have more than three or four days in the city it’s probably worth a day trip? The train is super fun for kids that age and some place like Giverny where they could run around and burn energy seems like it would be good. And it’s not Paris-specific, but I love to visit playgrounds when I travel with preschoolers. It’s fun for the kids and helps them burn off energy, and is an interesting way to get a glimpse of local culture.
We were in Paris with a younger kid, but I think this would be an issue for a 3 year old too: our biggest issue was that it was very hard to find decent restaurants open before 7 or even 8 pm. I know in general Europeans eat later than Americans do, but we’ve since been to a number of other European countries with a kid (Spain, Portugal, Italy) and Paris was really the only place where we couldn’t find a decent meal at 6 pm (it may be a big city thing more than a nationality thing? We weren’t in Madrid or Rome). We had some really mediocre meals on our Paris trip for that reason. In hindsight we definitely should have done more grocery store picnics, since even basic ingredients are so tasty there. La Grande Epicerie has great cheese and the best macarons I’ve ever had. I know some people here have luck with late-shifting their kids to accommodate 8 pm dinners, but not every kid can be shifted easily (mine wakes with the sun so she won’t get nearly enough sleep if she goes to bed at 10 pm) and if your kid is able to sleep in, you lose out on the early morning hours, which is my favorite time to explore a European city. Also I don’t want to eat that late myself, lol. I think at this point my 8 pm dinner days are well and truly behind me.
GCA says
I haven’t been to Paris with kids, but I’ve been a couple of times – some observations:
– Instead of restaurants, look for bistros and cafes, they may be more casual and open for meals earlier/ longer hours.
– Definitely do grocery store picnics! you can pick up some lovely bread, cheese and fruit and head to the Tuileries Garden or something like that.
– Not particularly fun for kid, but useful if you have kids — I like Petit Bateau for supersoft cotton clothing for kids.
Aunt Jamesina says
Petit Bateau and Jacadi have really cute clothes!
Anon says
If you want to shop, know that clothes in Paris run really small. I bought my then 14 month old daughter some 3T Jacadi dresses in Paris since she was wearing 2T with room to grow at home, and they were way too small. Apparently vanity sizing is not a thing in France and it extends to children.
NYCer says
It is a bit out of the way (northwest part of Paris), but my kids love Jardin d’Acclimatation. It is close to the Fondation Louis Vuitton if you have interest in visiting that. As an earlier poster recommend, I also highly recommend Jardin du Luxembourg (find the carousel!), as well as the Tuileries. Parc Monseau is also a nice little park that has a playground for kids. Musee Rodin has a quiet garden in the back if you just want to relax a little.
If the weather is bad, Galeries Lafayette is a decent place to pass some indoor time that isn’t a museum. There is also a nice rooftop terrace there.
I also think a trip up the Eiffel Tower is fun at any age. And a boat ride on the Seine.
It is definitely not highbrow, but we generally like to get to-go food at somewhere like Cojean for lunch and then find a place to eat outside. Though YMMV on this depending on the weather when you’re there.
Anon says
Yes Rodin! I suggested Musee D’Orsay above because that’s my personal favorite but Rodin is the best bet with kids because of the large outdoor space.
NYCer says
It is Parc Monceau with a C. Sorry, typo!
Anonymous says
If you are not really a Disney person and want to check it off your list, Paris Disney is worth considering. I took my 6 year old on a solo trip to Paris a few years ago and we took the train to Disney for a day. Super easy, not crazy crowded and we don’t have to do Disney here! The train drops you right at the entrance.
Anonymous says
Yes this. It’s so much cheaper to tack a day at Disney Paris onto a trip than to do a whole 5 day thing in Florida. It’s not as good, but your kids don’t know that.
Anon says
I think this makes more sense with a 6 year old than a 3 year old. I feel like a 3 year old isn’t going to get anything out of Disney and we would be much happier just running around parks and playgrounds in Paris.
NYCer says
+1. I was also considering a recommendation for Disney Paris (it is easy and fun), but I wouldn’t waste my time with a 3yo.
anonymous says
Check out davidlebovitz dot com. There is a Paris category on his site with lots of info. There is one post specifically titled “10 things to do with kids in paris”.
strollerstrike says
Thanks y’all! This community never disappoints!!
Anon says
I’m late to chime in but second the reco for the Jardin d’acclimatation! We spent extended time there with our 3 year old this summer and it was such a hit. Take the bus around vs metro – great for seeing the city at your kid’s eye level. And instead of going up the actual Eiffel Tower consider playing in the enormous champ de mars in front of it. Note that in playgrounds you will typically not find public restrooms (kids often just pee in the bushes). Monoprix has fabulous kids clothes at great (Target-like) prices that have held up well over the years. Also I haven’t done it but weather (wind / visibility) permitting there’s a hot air balloon ride at the Parc André Citroën.
Anon says
how do you know when something is actually a problem vs not? last night kiddo would not go to bed saying that no one says hi to her at school, no one plays with her on the playground, etc. she did not actually have school yesterday (attends a jewish school and we were observing yom kippur) and then this morning made no mention of any of it and happily went off to school. was this a bedtime stall tactic? she almost never stalls bedtime (her twin sister is more prone to that). i also feel totally ill equipped to handle preschool friendship challenges and i know there are many more challenging issues headed my way! whoever said the smaller the kid, the smaller the problem, the bigger the kid, the bigger the problem was totally right.
Anon says
My guess is that something happened that prompted this, but I don’t think it’s a big deal that you need to worry about. Preschoolers really blow things out of proportion, it’s how their brains work. So it may be that one kid didn’t want to play with her at one particular moment, and in her mind that takes on much larger significance – it doesn’t mean she doesn’t have friends or is miserable at school in general. Maybe you could try doing rose and thorn to hear more about your kid’s day? My kid *always* talks about friend stuff when we do that. Last night she said “The best part of my day was playing with [best friend]. The worst part was when [best friend] said she needed a break from playing with me.”
octagon says
Kids are such unreliable narrators. I’d give it a day or two and then fact-check it with the teacher if it’s still an issue.
Spirograph says
This. At various times, two of my kids have said things like this. My 1st grader tells me elaborate stories some evenings about how everyone on the playground is picking on him and fighting him, and then describes kung fu movie-esque fight scenes with how it all goes down… I don’t ignore it, but I give it a couple days and fact-check with an adult before worrying too much. I consider mood at drop-off and pick-up a much more reliable indicator.
Anonymous says
If my kid is overtired or upset about one thing, it will spiral into complaints about every irrelevant thing under the sun. Could that be what was going on?
Anonymous says
THIS. Things that might be a slight annoyance become THE END OF THE WORLD when overtired. It doesn’t mean there is not a nugget of something there bothering them but the scale is way magnified (honestly, this happens to me when I am overtired too).
anonM says
I’ve had a LO unhappy at school, and what I’d look at is consistent feet-dragging about school, consistently saying they have no friends at school/not naming anyone as a friend, and feedback from the teacher that they’re struggling in some way. I wouldn’t think it was a bedtime “tactic,” but we all reflect at the end of our day and maybe something happened that she did need to process. Also, if it IS coming up a lot, I’d ask the teacher in a non-accusatory way. Ex- kids not playing with your LO because LO is hitting is a very different story than LO just preferring to play alone most of the time or wanting to just sit by the teachers, etc.
Anonymous says
Do any of you have a kid who’s been a poor sleeper from day 1, and have you found anything that helps? One of my twins effectively hasn’t slept through the night since he outgrew newborn sleep. He has asthma, which I think is well managed? But every time he gets a tooth he gets sick and then it’s back to multiple night wakings. His room is dark, cool, has a sound machine. He has the same bedtime routine every night. I’ve paid several sleep consultants: they all say “you’re doing everything you can: not sure why he doesn’t sleep.” The pediatrician just kind of shrugs. He will go to sleep fine, but wakes 2-3 times a night screaming. It’s not night terrors: he’s awake and smiles as soon as you go into his room. I’m exhausted and just want him to sleep 6 hours in a row for once.
Ifiknew says
How old is he? My daughter was like this. I hope someone has a better answer for you but she had to just outgrow it with age. About 2.5 years I didn’t sleep thru the night, nothing else has been harder in parenting than that. She’s 5 now and sleeps 11 hours and goes to bed so easily. if she wakes up, she’ll roll around and understands not to wake us unless she’s really not feeling good. Hugs.
GCA says
+1, my first was like this and also had to outgrow it. He woke multiple times at night for well over 2 years. He pretty much outgrew it around age 3-4, with a brief hiccup for night potty training. He’s now 7 and remains a relatively light sleeper with low sleep needs, but sleeps 9.5h and just reads in bed when he wakes up in the morning.
OP says
He’s 20 months. Your post resonates with me a lot, thanks. I’m grumpy/short with all three of my kids from not sleeping and I hate it. Hopefully he will grow out of it.
GCA says
Oh, I am sorry! The night waking at 20 months was so hard for me mentally and physically with kid 1 – I’d just weaned but he was still waking up three times a night, and he was my first so I didn’t even have the ‘this too shall pass’ perspective. It felt endless. Sending strength.
Anon318 says
My son was a horrible sleeper until kindergarten. The whole family got the most sleep when we leaned into it – we made a pallet on the floor next to our bed and told him to come into our bedroom when he woke up at night, but not to wake us up. He still comes into our room at night from time to time, but he doesn’t wake us up and goes right back to sleep.
Anon says
Are you sure the asthma is well managed if he’s getting sick all the time? Constant sickness was the sign that my asthma was NOT well managed and once we got it under control I rarely got sick.
OP says
I mean…no? He’s on albuterol 4x a day and Flovent 2x a day. I honestly don’t know what else we can do but up his dose. He doesn’t always need the albuterol but definitely when he’s teething (which seems constant but it’s probably every 6 weeks for two weeks). The pulmonologist said he’s susceptible to viruses (which…duh) but so far his only advice is to keep him home from day care which I’m not going to do. I’ll bring it up with the pulmonologist again. Thanks!
Anon says
:( I’m sorry, asthma in little ones is so tough. It didn’t hit me hard until third grade and I basically outgrew it when I went through puberty so my time with it was fairly brief, but it still impacted me and my family a lot. I was basically home-schooled for third grade because I missed so much school.
Zennia says
Yes. A good sleep consultant was a lifesaver and well worth the money. We’re still reaping the benefits years later. There is no way we would have figured it out on our own.
OP says
Can you recommend who you used?
Zennia says
Sure – Jessica Vonda at Good Morning Sunshine. Absolute lifesaver. I thought the premium sleep package was well well worth the additional communication.
Zennia says
I’m in mod but search “Good morning sunshine” sleep consultant.
Anonymous says
One of my twins was like this and while it gradually got better – waking once a night by age 4 and not at all around age 7. At 8 he helps through the night and around 7.5 he was able to consistently potty and go back to bed himself without waking us. Before then he would wake and not be able to verbalized what was wrong. He also dreams a lot and talks in his sleep. He’s just a restless sleeper.
DH and I dealt with it by having assigned on and off nights.set schedule so kids know who is coming. If it’s an ‘off night’ I sleep with eye mask and earplugs and can usually sleep through the waking.
Anon says
Did he have a tongue tie? Does he sleep with his mouth open? He may not be getting fully rested. My son is 20 months and we had his tongue tie removed but still has poor oral motor skills (drools a lot, sleeps with mouth open, low tone in his mouth). There are some oral myofacial (spelling?) therapists that help kids learn how to close their mouth and rest their tongue on the top of the roof. I’m still trying to find one in my area for my son who is an open mouth sleeper and clearly not getting a full night’s of rest because his tongue droops.
I would not waste money on another sleep consultant if multiple have told you that you are doing all the right things.
Good luck! Signed, mom of a fellow bad sleeper.
Anon says
Unfortunately, all 3 of mine were bad sleepers. With the older 2, it eventually evened out at 7 and 4/5. But it was so hard. Just suffered through it for 18 months with my youngest. I found an online sleep school – middle of the night sleep deprived desperate google search – and while their claims of getting your child to sleep in 5 min seemed incredible, it worked for us (no crying it out was important for us). It’s called Batelle. They were reviewed in the Financial Times and have great online reviews (and some Reddit threads). It’s crazy expensive but my youngest has slept through the night since day 3 of the program 3 months ago and will also nap at home now (was a champion day care napper but not for us before this).
Anonymous says
Are you sure there are no adenoid issues? I don’t have personal experience but our good friend’s 3 year old had never slept through the night and started doing so after adenoid surgery.
Anon. says
Same with our 5-yr old neighbor
Anon says
Commenting for moral support/solidarity. My third is 18 months old and he is up multiple times per night. He has never slept more than 6 hours in a row – and that only happened a few times in his entire life. Sleep deprivation for 2+ years (taking into account pregnancy insomnia) is a unique, soul-sucking challenge. My older two also still wake up a couple times a week, to boot!
We did ear tubes and adenoids and it barely made a difference. Room is dark, quiet, with a cozy Woolino sack. I suppose SOMEDAY he’ll sleep…
Anon says
My poor sleeper is still regularly waking up in the middle of the night and she’s 5. No advice, just solidarity. Last night she actually made it from 11 to 7 asleep in the sleeping bag on the floor of our room without waking, but mostly because she was up multiple times the night before and was exhausted.
New employees during mat leave says
Reposting from yesterday b/c it was late in the day –
Have any of you had new direct reports start shortly before or while you were on mat leave?
I’m due in the next few months and will have one new direct start about 10 days to 2 weeks prior to my due date (I was induced at 40+1 with my first, so although I could always go into labor early, I’m hoping to make it to 40 again). I’ll also have a large number of people join my team, with several direct reports, about 1/2 way through my leave (due to the closing of an acquisition).
Any tips, pitfalls to watch for, etc? Boss is very supportive so that’s a non-issue.
Anon says
are you involved in hiring all of these people? i’d be concerned about other people doing the hiring for you if you are typically involved, and the onboarding process. make sure you have one that doesn’t involve you.
New employees during mat leave says
I’ve hired the one direct report that will start 10ish days prior to my leave (the long lag time between hiring and start is due to 3 months notice to his current employer).
The other new-to-me direct reports are b/c of an acquisition. So they’re already employed by the company we’re buying, and I’ll be involved in deciding who we keep. I will be on mat leave when the transaction closes.
anonchicago says
It’s about to happen to me. I had someone on my team who was close to being a manager who just resigned to take another role. I’m aggressively trying to hire to backfill the role, but likely the person will start either shortly before I leave or after I leave.
My boss was pretty concerned initially but has given me some support from another team he manages, and that person will backfill some of my work and can onboard the new person. I’m pretty concerned about what I’ll be coming back to, so I’m trying to document and do what I can before I go.
Pogo says
Yes, but they were internal (though somewhat new to the company, and the first employee to be hired by the parent company at an acquisition, so she didn’t feel super close to her coworkers on site and then… pandemic).
Have a good 30/60/90 day plan for them and a big list of all the people they need to meet with to achieve those objectives/go to for help while you’re gone.
Biggest pitfall: Making sure you get them the correct access rights to do their job asap. Particularly if approvals will route to your manager while you are out and they are not great at that kind of thing. In my company we limit certain access by job code as well so in this employee’s case I had to get her a promotion so she could see the correct data.
GCA says
Access rights is huge! we had to ‘promote’ a junior colleague in our resource management system so she could use the right tools to manage a project.
Anonny says
Anyone want to help me decide whether to switch daycares?
We’ve been at current center for two months and don’t love it. The main teachers are fine, but the afternoon ones aren’t great. When we pick up my oldest (K, who is just there for before and aftercare), the teacher often doesn’t look up from her phone or papers. The afternoon teacher for my youngest (2) is often sitting on the table, and I once walked in and saw my son wiping his face with a cleaning wipe (which she didn’t notice). The administration is…less than great – instead of telling us what we need to know, they just wait for us to ask, and they had a hell of a time getting the paperwork processed. The school, however, is super close to our house (8 mins), open until 6:30, provides hot lunch, and very diverse (which I love).
The other daycare is more academically focused and structured. The school is more modern, main teachers have BAs, school seems to be very well run and organized, and from what I could tell on the tour, all of the teachers were very engaged with the kids. The school, however, is less diverse, costs $225 more a month, does not provide meals to the kids, is 10 minutes away, and is only open until 6 pm.
I have an ~1 commute via public transit 3x/week and have a big job, and DH works from home (also with a big job). DH and I split drop off and pick up equally. We can afford the extra financial cost and can suck it up and make another lunch (the K-er insists on taking in her lunch), but my biggest concern with the switch is the closure at 6 pm.
I’m torn – the current school is more convenient, but the other option is of a much higher quality. I wish there were a third option that was open until 6:30, but most of the daycares in my area close at 6 or don’t provide afterschool care for my K-er’s school.
Thoughts?
Three Across says
Any ideas on how to fit three across in a Subaru Ascent? We will have one rear-facing convertible seat (too young to turn around), one front-facing convertible seat, and one infant carrier.
I’m sure we are going to have to buy at least some new carseats. We currently have the Graco Extend2Fit and Britax Advocate. (The Advocate is our favorite for how user friendly it is, but it’s also super wide.) We also have a Nuna Rava in our minivan that we could switch out.
I posted generally about this yesterday but am posting with more specifics as several people suggested!
Anon says
https://thecarseatlady.com/vehicles/3-across/subaru-ascent/
Anonymous says
Wow I love this.
OP says
This is so helpful, thank you!!
Anonymous says
I have 3. You need narrower seats. Clek Fllo for the rear facing, Graco Trazitions for the front facer. Maxi Cosi has good narrow infant seats.
We had three across in a Subaru Outback but it required a seat belt install for one of the seats. Seat belt install works better than latch install sometimes. Order matters as well – like a lot. We had Clek behind driver and clek in middle and Tranzitions behind front passenger.
Pogo says
Can’t you do 2 in the second row and one in the back? Or do you not have the captain’s chairs.
OP says
No, we opted for the Limited version with the bench seat.
TheElms says
The Clek’s that the carseat lady uses are very expensive. You likely can get similar results using the Graco SlimFit3 LX 3 in 1 (needs to be this model I believe to get the narrow width to allow 3 across).
Anonymous says
Also we tried the Clek and found it to be so bizarre and high and bulky that we returned it and got another Rava.
Anonymous says
Did you have the Foonf or the Fllo? The Foonfs are super high but I really liked the Fllos.
Bedtime blowouts says
So my husband does bedtime with our kids, 3 and 5, every night. Which is great, I always appreciate the down time. But lately him and 5 have been butting heads at bedtime and it ends up being just a mess from my outsider observer position. In my view, he’s asking reasonable things – “It’s time to brush your teeth.” – but if 5 doesn’t comply instantly, my husband will discipline and it will just escalate. Once the battle has started, neither of them budge. For me, the kid is tired (first time in full day school) and has been obedient all day, so I’d be cutting them some slack. This ends up being a huge fight between the 2 of them, with 5 ending up staying up late basically to calm themselves down after being discipline and then is tired in the morning, which is my shift with the kids and then 5 is a tired cranky curmudgeon in the morning who is disinclined to cooperate. With me, if I’m just calm, then the calmness seeps into the morning routine and we can get on our way. A couple minutes doesn’t make us late because I’ve built time into the schedule assuming we will have some resistance and I value a peaceful morning. I’m planning to discuss with my spouse this evening, but is there anything concrete you’d suggest? I’m reluctant to tell him he’s doing something “wrong” because I’m not in the arena at bedtime, but honestly, hearing it sucks as do my mornings after these blowouts. To be clear, I think he’s a good parent but I think everyone is tired by bedtime, including me.
Anon says
DH also has less patience than I do with some of this stuff, and his tone of voice tends to set off one of our kids. first of all i think very few kids comply instantly all the time, plus while that might make my life easier in the moment, i’m not trying to raise a robot. i also might approach parenting differently than you as my goal is not necessarily to get my kid to obey and then automatically switch to some punishment if they don’t (definitely not saying that my way is better, i think there are many many ways to be a great parent). if kiddo is tired from all day school, one thing i think can help is starting the bedtime routine earlier and then building in more reading or play time once teeth are brushed and jammies are on. i’ve noticed with one of my kids, that ten minutes later can make a huge difference. it’s been recommended here before, but i found the book ‘how to talk so little kids will listen’ to have a lot of great suggestions. i also always try to approach spouse not in a blameworthy way, but in a collaborative way, like it’s really unpleasant for all of us the way things went down at bedtime…
Anon says
Yeah I agree with absolutely all of this. Also added a nugget for now and in the future — my mom was a yeller, and nothing made me want to comply LESS with her than getting yelled at.
I also think that if the “discipline” is significant enough that your kid needs time to calm down from it to fall asleep, your husband is more than likely over disciplining the 5 year old for normal bedtime interactions. I too get frustrated and snap at my kids when I have to ask them to do something a few times at bedtime, but it’s over and done for both of us in about 5 minutes.
Also, real talk, the only times that my kids have needed to really calm down after I’ve yelled at them during bedtime is when I am absolutely overreacting to something else/taking it out on the kids. For whatever it’s worth, my 8 and 10 year olds have both told me that when that happens, they go to bed with incredible anxiety and fear, and one has told me that it leads to some really negative self-talk. As a result of these very honest conversations, now if I lose my temper at night, I will not let them go to sleep until we’ve all had a chance to repair (I apologize for over-reacting, we usually stay up a bit longer and have some bonding time, etc., which if the goal is to get to bed earlier tells me that you have to figure out how to avoid the big blow ups).
Spirograph says
Yeah, if it makes you feel any better, I think this is really, really normal and part of parenting growing pains. What works for us: My husband and I have a code word so we don’t have to say out loud “you’re not in the right head space to handle the kids anymore, my turn.” We also have had many conversations (in private) over the years about how we need to remember to be the adult and de-escalate. I find it most constructive to do this when everyone’s calm, not in the immediate aftermath of a contentious bedtime.
If the other parent isn’t there to tag in, we try to just put ourselves in time out. I will tell the kid(s) “I’m feeling really frustrated right now and I need to go sit quietly by myself for a minute to calm down. How about you do that too, and then we’ll try again.”
Pogo says
OK this code word thing might be a gamechanger. Often we can sense it in the other person, but not always. I am going to suggest this!
We split bedtime and DH takes the (usually easier) 2yo but it all depends. We both get to that point of “omg, stop stalling, I am going to lose it” with the 5yo at various times, though I am typically better so I handle more of his bedtime. Like you when I hear screaming and pouting I have a hard time not intercepting, especially since I’m like… this could all be avoided if you both de-escalated.
Spirograph says
My husband would get even more angry that I was “undermining his authority in front of the kids” if I tried to intercede when things were in a death spiral. I agree in principle that it’s important for parents to have a united front so the kids can’t play one off the other, but there’s a tipping point (for me) where it’s more important to re-establish peace / get the kids to bed! It was a game-changer for us, I hope it works for you, too
PS. Since there’s a common denominator between you and OP: 5 year olds, especially new kindergarteners, at bedtime are The Worst. It will just naturally get better in a year or so, anyway, at least IME.
Anonymous says
“My husband would get even more angry that I was “undermining his authority in front of the kids” if I tried to intercede when things were in a death spiral.”
OMG! Same here! Are we married to the same person?
Anonymous says
Offer to swap for a week!
Anon says
Is there a way to give the 5 year old more autonomy/independence around bedtime? I feel like this could be part of a larger conversation (privately) with your husband. We have not had specific resistance to toothbrushing, but generally my 4.5 year old reacts better to having independence, and I just read Hunter Gather Parent which reinforced that this is the best path for a lot of kids. It might not work for every kid (and I know it may not always work in the future for us), but currently my daughter has to go into her room at 8 pm to play alone and then she comes and gets us when she’s ready for us to tuck her in for bed, which she usually does by around 8:30 or so. Part of her being ready is brushing her teeth and changing into the next day’s clothes.
octagon says
This too shall pass! In addition to the other comments here, I can share two things that worked for us:
– moving bedtime earlier, even by 20 minutes, seemed to help with the overall level of tiredness. You can move it back after a few months of success, but I think it’s easy for adults to underestimate just how exhausting it is to start full-day school and how long it takes to really get adjusted to the schedule. Add in that their little brains are learning So! Much! All! Day! and the fatigue is real.
– build an incentive into the evening schedule. We read a story before bed and have a firm lights-out time. Our rule is that if kiddo is completely ready for bed by a certain time, we read extra until lights-out. If kiddo isn’t ready for bed with more than 5 minutes for a story, then there’s no story that night (“and you will have another chance tomorrow, good night”). It only took a couple of times of dawdling and losing a story to help kiddo understand that it’s important to get the bedtime routine done without a fuss.
SC says
Sometimes, people just get into ruts in the way they’re interacting with each other, and it’s hard to find a different way. I suggest you and your husband switching bedtime and morning duties for a while to see if things go more smoothly. The novelty of you doing bedtime may lead to some cooperation from your kid, or your way might actually work better, etc.
I empathize. My husband handles the weekday morning routine. I appreciate it, but my appreciation is diminished on mornings that they start yelling at each other.
Boston Legal Eagle says
Bedtime is harder than morning, IMO. Kids are exhausted, we’re exhausted, and I too get triggered when my kids don’t “obey” for the 100th time. Are you able to take a night here and there? And he does mornings? It might give you both a nice break in routine, and some practice at patience on both ends.
As for tangible steps at bedtime, our older kid can stall hard, so we often have to entice him with “you do this or else no videos” (he watches a video on his obsession du jour for a few min each night – right now it’s Titanic). That seems to work.
Walnut says
I’d go out for a walk or be out of listening distance while all of this is going down, personally.
My kids act very differently if they think there’s a chance the other parent will swoop in to “save them.”
anon says
One thing that really helps us get the kids moving when they don’t want to do what we ask is to make it a game. I look over at my husband and say with a big smile on my face, “HooOOOow long do you think so and so will take to get her pajamas on?!” I’ll say it with excitement and slightly exaggerated so the kid can register that it’s a game and get excited too. Then my husband will respond, “I don’t knooOOOoow. Maybe five seconds!?” And then we’ll tell the kids, “Okay, let’s see if you can do it in five seconds!!” Like it’s a race. Then I start counting and the kid will jump into the task wholeheartedly. It sounds super dumb, like kids are too sophisticated to fall for it, but kids love to win, they love to play, and it works 75% of the time with our four year old, and we often use it a couple times a day, and it hasn’t gotten old yet. I started this technique, and now my spouse does it too. I think finding just one or two tactics like this can really change interactions, because you don’t always have to default to threats or anger or having to be super patient/secretly annoyed when your kid isn’t complying. I’m sure this is age-specific and kid-specific, but worth a try.
Anon says
I’m your husband to some degree (I don’t expect instant compliance, but I also expect things to keep moving), but DH takes the “infinite patience” approach at the other end of the spectrum where kid can be allowed to lollygag up to two hours past her bedtime which also drives me batty. So, basically, we stay out of each other’s way at bedtime for whoever is on duty unless there is yelling involved (usually hers or mine) and then the other parent usually tags in.
Anon says
What do you mean by “discipline?” Raising his voice? Time outs?
Anon says
Any recommendations for traveling in Bali, Singapore and Jakarta (with tweens/teens)? Access to the beach in Bali is a priority.
Anon says
No but I’m so jealous!
Anon says
Lots of lovely resorts in Bali. We stayed at the Ayana in Jimbaran for part of it and it does have a private beach (though was kind of too windy the days we tried going), and also lots of pools to choose from and fantastic dining options. It’s not that far from the airport either.
The markets in Ubud would be fun for tweens but it’s inland so you won’t get a beach.
GCA says
I have younger kids and haven’t been a teenager for decades so take these with a pinch of salt, but some Singapore recs:
If you’re going to Bali, skip the Singapore beaches, do the food tours. I think the Betel Box hostel still runs several food tours – you don’t have to stay there.
The zoo and other wildlife parks are really nice open-concept ones, if the family is into that. If they’re into adrenaline rushes, go to Universal Studios.
Shopping (unless it’s truly teen Korean-inspired fast fashion at the Far East Plaza or Bugis+ malls) will not be cheaper than in the US, but all of the quick dopamine-hit junky food that appeals to teens (bubble tea, street-food snacks, Hong Kong-style egg waffles) will!
Vicky Austin says
Minor harrumph: husband doesn’t want me to spend any “extra” money on maternity clothes. Dude, I’m literally busting out of my pants and none of my shirts are long enough, and it happened overnight. I’m not going to clients with my belly hanging out. The budget might have to bend for me.
Anon says
Yes definitely please ignore husband and buy some maternity clothes! You’ll be wearing those clothes for a bit postpartum too. I’d post on local mom groups to see if people are trying to unload their maternity wear.
Anne-on says
What the what? Does he expect your clothing to be made by Edna Mode and magically expand in all directions with you? I’d buy what you need within reason, inform him that having clothing that covers your body is non-negotiable, and move on.
Anonymous says
How is it minor that your husband thinks you need his permission to buy clothes you need and wants to withhold his permission.
anon says
Um, what? I hope he’s not always this ridiculous.
Anonymous says
What!? No. I mean, I did not enjoy spending money on maternity clothes. But you gotta do what you gotta do. One thing that might make it feel like a better investment would be to buy nursing-friendly maternity clothes. Then you’ll get a lot more time in them. Seraphine is good for this. Also, do you have any friends/ family who can pass on their maternity clothes to you? Personally, I can’t wait to give mine away!
Anon says
Is he always so controlling? This anecdote as a standalone story seems like a huge red flag, but I know sometimes people do very out of character things.
Vicky Austin says
No, he isn’t. I think it’s a combination of him genuinely not getting how fast my body has changed just in the last week (I’m surprised too!), and generally having a hard time being flexible about his financial goals. I’ll sit down with him tonight and we’ll discuss it; I just wanted to air my irritation. Thanks for validating me, everyone. :)
Anonymous says
Tell him also “dude. The default position is I know my body and my needs and we aren’t impoverished so I get to meet them. You need to figure out a way to cope with your feelings on this because this? Telling me you don’t want me buying maternity clothes? Is not going to be how our marriage works.”
Anonymous says
Does he have extreme financial anxiety? Parenthood did this to my husband. He never wants to spend any money on anything, even necessities, because COLLEGE.
SC says
Babies and children require flexibility with financial goals. He might as well start now. Maternity clothes are essential, not “extra,” and there should be an appropriate budget for at least a capsule maternity wardrobe.
Anonymous says
Agreed I find it horrifying.
Anon says
Same.
anon says
Right? I mean, the need for maternity clothes are among the lease subjective purchases. What happens when you have to buy every type of bottle or pacifier to see which one baby will take? Trying different diapers? Creams? Baby grows like a week and only wears 6 mo clothes for like 2 months. DH better buckle up!
anonM says
Yes, it will. Is this your first? My DH is frugal too, I get that it is not necessarily controlling. But you get to be comfortable for 9 months. Bonus points for maternity/postpartum/nursing clothes that will last even longer in your wardrobe. Those stretchy pants and various-sized bras for the stages of pregnancy will also work in various post-partum stages as your body fluctuates, especially if you end up nursing. FWIW, I still wear “maternity” tank tops because they’re comfy and I like how long they are. You can skimp on the brand new baby bouncer and buy used for some newborn things, but can’t really avoid your body is changing.
anonchicago says
Based on the follow up comment, my DH had a similar reaction to maternity clothing. Like he wasn’t against it, but we had just bought a new house and he didn’t understand why I suddenly needed a new wardrobe when I wasn’t showing yet. By like 20 weeks he was firmly in the camp of “whatever makes you happy and comfortable through the pregnancy”.
I would caution you to go slow in buying things because everyone shows pregnancy differently and what may fit at 20 weeks doesn’t fit at 30. For example, all of my bras basically stopped fitting by 5 weeks before I was even sure I was pregnant. I’ve gone up more bra sizes than I even thought possible. I’m buying cheaper brand nursing bras from Target or Amazon but it’s still an expense.
Another one is maternity leggings. I bought a few pairs final sale at Old Navy and really don’t like them. Judging by comments on pregnancy forums, many women prefer to wear their preferred leggings and just size up.
We’re going into colder weather but I’m due early December and not planning to buy a maternity coat. I wore DH’s larger jackets for our recent babymoon in Iceland and some of my full zip sweaters still fit so I’m making do with that.
Vicky Austin says
This is super helpful advice; I appreciate it! (And yes, there’s some anxiety at work here; not from a financially insecure childhood, just his GAD crystallizing in the face of Being a Dad, I imagine.)
Anonymous says
What?!? Will he also refuse to spend “extra” money on car seats and diapers and day care? No, you cannot just cram a pregnant belly into non-maternity clothes, even stretchy ones.
Boston Legal Eagle says
Is he an anxious person? It sounds like he’s taking out his anxiety about becoming a parent on this, and that will only get worse once baby is here. Babies/children bring a lot of unexpected expenses, not to mention life changes, so I’d suggest he work on that asap.
Anon says
Yeah…he is prepared for how much a kid costs? I spent less than $500 total on maternity clothes while pregnant. I spent that amount probably biweekly on the baby, even ignoring childcare costs (which are obviously not insignificant). And they don’t get much cheaper as they grow up – childcare costs and costs for very specific “baby items” go down, but costs for food, entertainment, activities, etc all go way up. If a pair of $20 Old Navy maternity pants is straining your budget, or at least his idea of what the budget should be, how are you going to afford a child?
Anon says
Maybe talk to your DH about reframing the expense as a necessary family expense, not a personal vanity expense. DH and I are very budget conscious, and clothes purchases usually come out of our individual “discretionary budgets,” i.e., our fun money we get to spend on coffee, clothes, sports tickets, etc without checking in with each other. But when I was pregnant, we acknowledged that I was doing a “chore” on behalf of the family that needed to be accounted like others. We created a new pool of money called “baby,” which we both spent for baby-related items like carseats, cribs, post-partum takeout, and a portion for my maternity clothes and some recovery goals, like PT sessions. My DH is also obsessed with his financial goals. Creating a “baby” budget was a way to integrate the new expenses into his financial plan instead of feeling like our spending was out of control.
anon says
Don’t even make it a conversation. Just buy the clothes you need. If he has the audacity to question your purchases later, just say, “It’s normal for women to buy maternity clothes. This isn’t a want, it’s a need.” He probably just got triggered and defensive in the moment, because money issues can do that to people, but if he has a chance to think it over, he will come to his senses. No need to take the initial no as a final no.
Anonymous says
Is this “any” maternity clothes or “I have 2 weeks left of pregnancy but nothing fits?” Either way I think the answer is you need to have appropriate clothing for comfort and work/situational appropriateness. But if it’s the former seriously wtf?
anon says
Help me think through this annual dilemma. Should my kid participate in our church’s Christmas musical? This is where my values clash. On one hand, it is important to me for my kids to actively participate in our faith community. On the other: it’s weekly Wednesday night rehearsals from mid-October through early December. It usually comes with extras that I’m never prepared to handle, like tracking down a very specific wardrobe item, or providing cookies for rehearsal, etc., etc. Fall is my family’s busiest season, and adding yet another activity is a big ask, even though our church is close and convenient to home. It’s not one thing, it’s ALL of the things combined. My kid is lukewarm about the experience. Like she’ll do it, but doesn’t love it. And if you ask me, the music pastor really overcomplicates things, and I kind of wish he’d just let the kids sing a few Christmas carols and call it a day (i.e., the programs of my childhood, which had zero mid-week rehearsals).
I guess I’m looking for permission to NOT do this, but I feel really guilty about it. It feels selfish to prioritize a night at home doing nothing vs. being an active participant in church. And I feel sort of obligated to ensure good participation via my kid.
How do you balance these competing priorities?
Anonymous says
You can be active in church and value church and faith as a Christmas priority without doing this one specific thing? Like go to church on Sundays. Have an advent wreath you light every night. Play church Christmas music in your home. Read the Christmas story together.
So many options!
anon says
Very good points, thank you. I feel like we already do quite a bit to celebrate the reason for the season and I need to get over some of my hangups about this particular activity.
Anonymous says
It kind of sounds like you have FOMO? Like you had this vision of seeing your child dressed as an angel with tinsel wings and creating lifelong memories for her that you don’t want to give up on even though the time commitment is out of proportion?
anon says
You’re right, I think there is some of this happening. I want her to have memories of being a Christmas program, and since schools don’t do that anymore (understandably!), this is her only opportunity. I do think the time commitment is pretty onerous for memory-building …
Anonymous says
If she is involved in school music in middle and high school, there will most definitely be “holiday” concerts.
NLD in NYC says
If kid is meh and you’re meh, don’t do it. Jesus still loves you.
Anonymous says
This. My kid does one church activity she really likes and we opt out of the rest. There are plenty of ways for your family to participate and serve. In our congregation, families can sign up to light a candle on the advent wreath during regular Sunday services. We invite children and families to serve as readers throughout the year and especially at the services that are heavy on readings (Evensong, Tenebrae, Lessons & Carols, etc.). Slightly older kids can be acolytes and crucifers. None of these opportunities takes up any time outside of services.
I detest our church’s Christmas pageant. It is truly painful to watch. When they decided to combine the Christmas pageant with the adult and youth choir Christmas concert, which is actually pretty decent, I groaned.
anon says
Ooof, I hope my church doesn’t go this direction. The Christmas cantata is wonderful. The kids’ musical … not nearly as much.
Anon says
For me, the biggest factor is that your kid is lukewarm on it. I would give her preferences weight, and let her not do it.
octagon says
Christmas happens every year. Maybe you don’t participate this year, but does next year. Or doesn’t next year, but the opportunity is not a one-time thing. Especially if your kid isn’t gung-ho for it.
I challenge your view of being an active participant. There are ways to be active without a weekly commitment plus extras. You already go to services, yes? If you feel guilty for not doing more, maybe you can help in another way for the holiday season?
anon says
Yes, we already go to services, and there are probably other ways we can help during the holiday season. I think I’m bringing a lot of baggage into this. Namely, my mom always directed our Christmas programs and would be sort of horrified that I’d “allow” my kids to skip such a thing. I didn’t quite realize that’s where this angst was coming from … damn people-pleasing, again.
Vicky Austin says
PS – if I’m understanding your posts correctly, your mom directed the Christmas programs of your childhood with no mid-week rehearsals? If so, counter her horror with that. Things have clearly changed.
Anonymous says
Well, can your mom take your kids to rehearsals?
anon says
Unfortunately, she doesn’t live close enough to do that! But not a bad idea. :)
NLD in NYC says
I’m working on people-pleasing myself. One scripture that helps: “Am I now trying to win the approval of men, or of God? Or am I trying to please men? If I were still trying to please men, I would not be a servant of Christ.” Gal 1:10.
Anonymous says
Sort of along the same lines, in response to: “It feels selfish to prioritize a night at home doing nothing vs. being an active participant in church. And I feel sort of obligated to ensure good participation via my kid”–remember the stuff in the Bible about the importance of the Sabbath, which is more broadly construed by many Christians as rest.
Vicky Austin says
+1. Rehearsals starting in October for a kids’ Christmas thing is more than “active participation.”
anon says
I appreciate the gut check!
anonM says
That sounds like a lot tbh. Can you sign up for a volunteer shift somewhere meaningful to you instead? People have all kinds of ways of expressing faith/participating and that is a good thing. No one would want me in the church choir, but glad others can worship that way and have that skill! If you really feel torn, maybe see if the music pastor would accommodate some smaller roles that don’t require as many rehearsals because the time commitment is too much for your family this year. I doubt you are the only one thinking this.
anon says
It is too much. I am longing for something much simpler, and more meaningful. I need to think on this some more …
Anonymous says
For instance, on Wednesday evenings instead of running around doing all of this. You could have a practice of turning off the lights and reading by the twinkling lights of the Christmas tree.
NLD in NYC says
You can volunteer to serve the poor as a family, participate in a food/clothing drive, make gift bags, etc. I think serving others is more in the spirit of the seasons than a musical (and I love musicals!).
anon says
Valid points. I think that would be a lot more meaningful to all of us.
SC says
This sounds like a lot, and I probably wouldn’t make my kid participate in anything she was “meh” on for 8-10 weeks. If you want to help out, volunteer to do one thing–make the cookies for rehearsal, track down a specific wardrobe item or prop, etc. You can make life easier by sharing the burden with the parents of kids who are excited about participating.
Anonymous says
Are these Wednesday night rehearsals by chance tied to other Wednesday night programming at the church? Our church tends to put lots of stuff on Wednesday nights on the assumption that it will be so easy for families just to tack on the extra thing when they’re already there for Wednesday night dinner and small groups. Which is super annoying because most working families do not usually come on Wednesday nights because we are too busy.
anon says
Surprisingly, we don’t have a ton of Wednesday-night programming like a lot of congregations do. The church used to host a Wednesday-night dinner for pageant families, but that was cut out because it was a lot of work and there weren’t enough people to take that on. I sure couldn’t, though I appreciated being able to eat before rehearsal.
SC says
I grew up in a church with Wednesday night dinner and programming. My dad was a minister at the church. My mom worked FT as a doctor and got one afternoon off per week (compensates for call). I recently connected the dots that my mom took Wednesday afternoons off and skipped the church programming. I carpooled from school to church, ate dinner there, attended Wednesday night programming, and went home with my dad. My mom had 1 pm – 9 pm off work and by herself, with no homework or dinner or household routine, every Wednesday. I’m so jealous during this stage of my life when I treasure the 30 minutes alone in my house while DH does morning drop-off.
Anonymous says
I would do that for Nutcracker. Not a church Christmas pageant.
ElisaR says
i had the same thought…. but nutcracker rehearsals tend to be way more than this in reality.
good for them, not for me says
I try to treat other people’s love of doing things that take a lot of time and effort as a “good for them, not for me.” My community is awash is activities that some people really enjoy that take loads of time and effort. I absolutely would not sign up for something with this kind of time commitment if my kid wasn’t super enthusiastic.
It’s been awhile since I practiced Christianity, but wouldn’t something like serving the poor be more important and aligned with Christian values? Not that a pageant is bad, but it doesn’t seem like a central tenet of Christianity.
Anonymous says
I learned a long time ago that “a night at home doing nothing” is not, in fact, a night doing nothing. It’s a night when I’m regaining or conserving energy so that I can do other things. I’m an active participant in my church and think that it’s important. I do not think that being an active participant in your church requires you to do a Christmas pageant. Full permission to ditch the thing in favor of simplicity and down time.
Full permission as well to spend some time figuring out why the thought of not having your kid do this is making you feel so guilty, and why that feeling of guilt is distressing enough to make you do something neither you nor your daughter want to do and that is not (I promise) remotely a moral decision of any kind. There is no right/wrong here.
Anon says
It’s really ok to opt out of things that don’t bring you joy. I opted out of taking my kid to dance today (with her permission) because I have a ton of work and DH is giving a night exam and dealing with a ton of student drama and it’s observation night at dance so there was no way I was going to get anything done during the class.
Carseat color? says
Another car seat question! Would you buy a black carseat? I need a new convertible seat and found one on sale for $100 off (!) but only in black. The lighter colors are not on sale. I worry that the black might be too hot? Is that irrational?
It’s hard for me to justify spending $100 more on a lighter color but then again, this is a purchase we will be using for a long time.
Anon says
I think all my carseats have been black? It never occurred to me it would be an issue.
Anonymous says
I’d rather have black because stains will show less.
Anon says
+1
Aunt Jamesina says
They do show mineral sunscreen and spit up stains really easily IME. I like our gray car seats.
NYCer says
Same.
Boston Legal Eagle says
I haven’t noticed any issues with our black carseats, but our cars are parked in the garage mostly. I wouldn’t worry about it though. Black seems like a very common carseat color.
Anonymous says
Aren’t all the high-end ones black? Lighter colors remind me of the old-school Graco seats.
Anon says
The Clek Foonfs are super fancy and they’re white. Or at least my friend’s is white. That seems like a nightmare cleaning-wise but to each their own… And our super budget Cosco travel seats are black. I don’t think the color is very correlated with price.
Seafinch says
I have a black Foonf!
anonny says
All of our are black, BUT since you plan to use for a long time check date of manufacture. I learned in the car seat fbook group posted here that retailers may significantly discount seats over a year old which = fewer years of usage for you. Apparently that should be listed as a sticker on the box – not sure if buying online. So if the seat expires 6 years after expiration but seat was manufactured in 2020….you lose 2 years.
Isabella says
This was definitely an issue with the newborn seat I bought on a significant online sale. I was disappointed the expiration date will probably pass before Kid 2 uses it.
PinkKeyboard says
We’ve had a ton of black (or in the babies case a very dark plum type Nuna) and none of them have seemed to get overly hot.
Anonymous says
You can leave a light colored towel over it when parked if you are concerned.
Anonymous says
We’ve only had black (all black Cleks). This was a feature not a bug in Canadian winters.
I feel like 2010-2020 it was cooler to have all black non-kiddy looking car seats and the trendy has swung towards all white or white with a color print and as the higher end option. Time being a luxury and whites you have time to keep it pristine.
AwayEmily says
the only thing that gets hot in our carseats are the metal buckles.
So Anon says
I know this is late in the day for many, but I need to scream into the void. I am drowning at home and at work with no relief in the next several weeks. At work, I work in-house as a member of a small legal team for a subsidiary of a major international corporation. Our junior attorney left in early September. My boss is on sabbatical for four weeks. While I generally good at juggling multiple priorities, I am beginning to be overwhelmed at work. Our junior attorney handled a specialized area that required a quick response. My boss and I split the substantive work, with me taking a larger share so she could handle all the meetings. Now I am doing the work of the junior, all the meetings and all the substantive work. Drowning. And I’ve just learned that despite stellar reviews (exceeds or strongest performer), I am in the bottom 10% of my pay band.
On the home front, this summer I had reason to believe that my ex was drinking. He promised up and down that it was not true and agreed to remote alcohol monitoring. We put an agreement in place in August. He sees the kids every other Saturday to Sunday. This past weekend, the remote test showed that he had alcohol in his system at 8am on a Saturday, likely left over from Friday night. Per our agreement, he forfeited his time with the kids. I am taking heart in the fact that this shows that my instincts were right, the remote monitoring is working and that my kids are safe. At the same time, it has been a very tough few weeks of parenting. My community lost a local young teen in an unexplained accident (likely hiking), after he was missing for 5 days. The teen’s younger sibling is a friend of my kiddo. The ex did not once ask or check in on the kids. The ex is not talking to my kids about his drinking. I am taking my oldest kiddo to therapy every week so that he has someone to talk to, but the only available spot is in the middle of the work day. I make it work. This past weekend, I ran a half-marathon that I trained so hard for. My ex was supposed to have the kids, so I scrambled to find a place for them to be in the early hours when I had to get up for the race. I am emotionally and physically exhausted.
Anon. says
I have no wisdom to add here but just want to affirm your void screaming – F* that sounds really hard and just the fact that you’re putting one foot in front of the other and doing the next thing is impressive. I want to curl up in a ball in my closet and cry on your behalf.
NYCer says
+1. This must be so incredibly difficult.
CCLA says
That sounds like way more than one person can handle – kudos for not only getting through the days but also still making sure to do the thing for yourself (half marathon) and not throw in the towel on that. Seems like a good time to ask about bumping that pay up (especially with your taking on extra work)? But I know that conversation might be more than you feel like you can handle right now and that’s also okay.
Anne-on says
My lord, you have all of my sympathies and admiration. I’m on the verge of an overstimulated meltdown after a busy home/work week and I have an active partner and sitters. Do you have a faith or school community you can lean on? I would 100% help out another mom in my son’s class if she was going through this.
At work – can you set some very firm expectations – you are ONE person, it is simply not possible for you to do the work of THREE people. I would request an immediate meeting with your bosses boss and lay out what MUST happen, and what will be put on medium hold, and what will be on the back burner until you get more help. Their bad planning is not your problem to solve – if you landed in the hospital tomorrow they would have to figure it out, so they can figure it out now. Also – when your boss is back I would have a serious conversation about bumping your pay up at the same time as dusting off your resume and starting to network for a better role.
Anonymous says
Hire outside counsel in the speciality?
CCLA says
This might be too late in the day so may ask again tomorrow, but for those that have recommended the yoto player (I think I heard about that here), would you say it’s good for a 6yo? My newly 6 yo is having trouble winding down at night. She and 4yo sister share a room and we have for a long time allowed 15-30 minutes after we tuck them in to have low lights with play time (magnatiles, flipping through books, etc). Sometimes they play songs on the echo, too. She has recently expressed boredom with the usual stuff, and while I’m a fan of letting them be bored sometimes, I am sympathetic to not being able to wind down my brain and I want to explore alternatives with her. I think she might appreciate an audio book. We could use the echo in their room but wondering if this might be better.
Marshmallow says
Yes, I think it would be. My 3.5 YO still feels too young for some aspects of it (challenging for her to cycle through “chapters,” for example) and there are plenty of more advanced cards for her to grow into. If you’re willing to spend the time creating your own cards from content that you purchase elsewhere– music, audio books, etc.– it can really grow with your kid. Anything you own outright in digital form, you can burn onto a card.
CCLA says
Hmm interesting. I am not keen on a lot of work to make more cards vs just buying something already made, so I will look into this. Thanks for the feedback!
Cb says
I’d just put audible on an old phone? Or play it from the echo.
rakma says
Our almost 6 yo operates the mini just fine. We signed up for a year of Yoto club, which gets you 2 new cards a month. which helps with novelty. We haven’t done any of the make your own cards, but there’s a lot of variety in the already set up cards.