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When I saw this product (here’s how it’s used), it had my husband’s name written all over it, being that he’s an avid snowboarder, into all things new and gadget-y, and recently got a standing desk at work. He’s also a very high-energy person whose leg is always jiggling under the table. I see this being a fun way to listen in on a conference call when you’re not an active participant, or read caselaw or some other usually static activity. I’m sure it fires up those muscles you have to use for balance, and increases core strength. Personally, I am definitely not coordinated enough for it, and just had knee surgery, so count me out — but this seems like a really unique gift for someone with better control over their body than me! It’s $189 and available on FluidStance.com. Scandi DeckSales of note for 4.18.24
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And — here are some of our latest threadjacks of interest – working mom questions asked by the commenters!
- If you’re a working parent of an infant with low sleep needs, how do you function at work when you’re in the throes of baby’s sleep regression?
- Should I cut my childcare down to 12 hours a month if I work from home?
- Will my baby have speech delays if we raise her bilingual?
- Has anyone given birth in a teaching hospital?
- My child eats everything, and my friends’ kids do not – how should I handle? In general, what is the best way to handle when your child has some skill/ability and your friend’s child doesn’t have that skill/ability?
- ADHD moms, give me your tips to help with things like behavior in the classroom, attention to detail, etc?
- I think I suffer from mom rage…
- My husband and kids are gone this weekend – how should I enjoy my free time?
- I’m struggling to be compassionate with a SAHM friend who complains she doesn’t have enough hours of childcare.
- If you exclusively formula fed, what tips do you have for in the hospital and coming home?
- Could I take my 4-yo and 8-yo on a 7-8 day trip to Paris, Lyon, and Madrid?
Cb says
We’re in a small flat and I realized we don’t have any physical activities for my toddler (17 months) to do. The space is too small for a slide etc and we live in Scotland so it can be dark and rainy outside. We got rid of our couch so I can’t even toss the cushions on the floor for him to climb on.
Does anyone have a wobbel board? Any other ideas?
Anonymous says
Around that age we had a lot of dance parties in the living room. Bonus points if you get out scarves to wave around or percussion toys to shake. Acting out kids’ songs and hide and seek were also hits.
Annie says
Eh – he’ll probably initiate a ton of active activities on his own in a few months. For example, our 2 1/2 year old’s favorite thing is to load up her dolly stroller with puzzle pieces and push it around the apartment. We definitely wouldn’t have invented that game but she’ll run around for a long while doing that.
Cb says
Good point. He got a micro-scooter for Christmas and he won’t sit on it but he will happily push it through the house going ‘scoot scoot scoot’
Anonymous says
masking tape and a sharpie. It’s my ‘go to’ when I get stuck inside with the kids all day in a snowstorm. You can tape out an activity trail on the floor. X for hop, diagonal line for hop on one foot, etc. You can use a sharpie to show which direction to go or write down what activitiy. At 17 months, even basic stuff will be fun. You can have him pretend to walk a stuffie through the path as well. Masking tape you can leave down for a couple days and easily pulls up.
Also, I would encourage you to embrace the weather. Get good rainy gear and get outside. Jumping in puddles as a adult with my kids is super fun. Go for a walk around the block with flashlights when you get home.
Cb says
Ooh, masking tape sounds like a great idea. We also bought these jumbo cardboard blocks from Ikea which I think will make for more physical play. We’ve got puddle jumpers, wellies, and snow clothes if it ever snows (apparently the best way to guarantee a mild winter is to buy snow boots and trousers).
rosie says
We once set up a baby ninja warrior course for our young toddler–mostly used our fitness stuff (yoga blocks, foam roller, etc.)–complete with a buzzer at the end (Little People airplane). High entertainment value for all involved.
Mama Llama says
All of these ideas are good, but I would add try to get outside at least a little even if it’s dark and/or rainy. If you have decent rain gear, you can have a good time splashing in puddles or checking out water flowing in gutters. When it’s dark a lantern or flashlight walk can be fun. Just some things to consider if you start to get cabin fever.
Seafinch says
Agreed. We live in Canada and even when we had -20 every day for months, we went outside. Similarly, in Germany where it rained, often miserably, every day, we also went out every day. The Germans have an expression, “There is no bad weather, just bad clothing”. I agree. Get the right rain gear and it is no big deal and my kids start to implode without fresh air. It is non-negotiable.
ElisaR says
haha I always was told it was a Norwegian expression!
Artemis says
Also agreed. At my house, when it’s rainy but not cold, we make our own waterpark–we get in swimsuits and rain jackets and go to the local park with a finished surface (recycled rubber, not a mudpit) and slide on the slides and do everything we would normally do at the park, just getting soaking wet. Obviously not ideal in winter, although I’ve done it with rash guards and long warm pants when it’s a little colder.
One thing we do that would be fun for a toddler is build boats or structures out of duplos (easier to keep track of) and put them in the “rivers” that form along the sides of the street as water runs to the storm drains. This also works with balloons. We live on a non-busy street, watch for cars, and a grownup always stands a few feet in front of the storm drain to stop the toy before the waterfall :).
AwayEmily says
Maybe too late in the day for this question — but you guys who say you take your kids outside every day, even in winter…do you do it in the dark, too? We pick our kids up from school at 4:30 and by the time we are home it is mostly dark. Sometimes we go for a family walk after dinner, but it’s hard to really “play” when it is pitch black. Maybe I should invest in some headlamps? I really like the “outside every day” in theory but in practice it’s tough to make it work when it its dark by 5.
Mama Llama says
I don’t take my kids outside every day, but I try to take them out as much as possible. I agree that darkness is tough. Some things we have done in the dark are jumping on the trampoline by the light of the porch light, exploring with flashlights, and building a fire in a free-standing fire pit. Mostly I try to get home at least at twilight and get the older one to run around in the yard a bit right after daycare before we even go in the house.
AnonToo says
I live in the arctic circle and fully endorse headlamps, or even just reflective gear. It is true that we are often the only ones in the park, but that just makes running straight into one another less likely.
anon. says
bilibo! super cheap and easy to shove under a table. and it grows with the kid – my 24 MO does totally different things on it than his 28 MO cousin!
Pogo says
Baby Pogo got a foldable tunnel for Christmas – it packs up flat so can be stored under something or against the wall, but when unfurled it’s 6 feet. There’s a lot of peekaboo mileage out of it as well as me ‘chasing’ him from one end to the other. I think it was about $25 on Am*zon.
We also have a y-bike inside that he scoots around on, too.
lawsuited says
We have one of those knitted round pouffe/ottomans and my son uses it as a seat, stage, trampoline, climbing structure, hurldle, bowling ball, and so on. It also doubles as a footstool for his mama!
My sons other favourite activities are “vacuuming” (sometimes with his toy vacuum, sometimes with a wrapping paper roll), lugging packs of diapers in and out of the Amazon box, and a game we call hi/bye in which he carries a shopping bag as he runs around the dining table and stops in to say “hi” or “bye” to me periodically.
Anonymous says
How long does the 10-week OB appt last? I think I’m going to get the NIPT, and meet with the doctor (I think I will have to schedule a separate appointment for the ultrasound but I’m not sure on that). Trying to figure out if I can make a meeting scheduled an hour after my appointment.
mascot says
You can call the office and ask. Even then, I found OB appts to be frustratingly unpredictable on wait times. My doctor was apologetic, but said it comes with the territory. Moms have questions that take longer to answer, there are emergencies/ serious situations that pop up without much notice, etc. I went to a large group practice, FWIW.
Walnut says
Between wait time in the office and transit time, I’d almost never plan on making it back to the office in an hour.
I recall the first appt involving a quick ultrasound and a longer discussion with the doctor to baseline.
rosie says
Is it your first OB appt? Only you know how prompt your doctor tends to run & how much they talk. How do the blood draws work in your office, is it a centralized area where you have to wait your turn? I think the first OB appt had lots of bloodwork, so that can take time just do do the draw (and then depending on how you are feeling, you might need to sit for a few min). And there is also a finger prick blooddraw (I think that’s if you’re doing NT testing, I cannot remember).
Anonymous says
I had to allow a half-day for every appointment. You could end up spending an hour in the waiting room and then another half-hour waiting in the exam room.
The Elms says
Mine was about 90 minutes. I had an ultrasound which took about 20 min, I had to leave urine sample and get a blood draw for baseline numbers and do the finger prick for the NT test. That all took about 15-20 minutes as well. Then my practice has you go back to the waiting room before seeing the doctor. So there was a wait and then I saw the doctor for about 30 minutes or so to discuss other prenatal testing, my dates, my history. I’ve been seeing this practice my whole adult life so going through the history seemed odd, since they have it all.
Staying dry overnight says
For those of you who had kids who took a LONG time to stay dry overnight, any tips?
I honestly think that she just can’t do it physically — too deep a sleeper, etc. There is a family history on DH’s side where some people take until they are 10 to be dry overnight (like on their own, no adult intervention like getting them up to go to the bathroom; maybe 8 with adults waking them periodically). I know it’s odd for a girl. We went to a pediatric urologist once who noted no physical problems and thinks that we may likely have to wait it out if there is a family history.
My older daughter was dry overnight with really no prompting on my part from when she was 3 (she woke up dry for a week, we ditched the pullups, and she maybe had 1 accident but we never went back). Her sister is 6 and in school and is nervous about other kids finding out esp. during scouting camping trips.
Anonymous says
My first wasn’t ever really dry overnight. I eventually just took off the diaper (around 3- she’s been day trained since and dry at all naps) and she had 3 accidents and never wet the bed again. I was waiting for her to wake up dry, which she never did because she was in the habit of diaper peeing!
Anonymous says
OP here. I thought of that (especially at first), but even if I get her up at 5 when I get up, she is not dry b/w 11pm and 5am (and it’s not like she’s up and sneaking drinks overnight, so I think it is just is what it is).
In the summer, when we can get away with no real bedding, we experiment a bit more but nothing has had any traction. There may be no hack for this.
Sarabeth says
FWIW, my daughter was never once dry overnight until we took her pullup away at 4.5. I’m sure there are kids who can’t stay dry at that age, and yours may be one of them. But there are also kids who are perfectly capable of it, but will use the pull up if they are wearing it.
RR says
My son was 10. It’s within the range of normal. I just waited until his body was ready, talked to him about how he would know his body was ready, and eventually it was. My youngest was 3 when she was dry overnight. Different kids take different lengths of time.
RR says
I’ll add that the overnight camp my son attended for two years before he was dry at night was really good about it–super matter of fact. He was able to be discreet, but it was also very clear from the paperwork and materials that he was far from the only kid who brought pull ups. It was completely not an issue for him at all.
Elle says
My four and a half year old isn’t consistently dry overnight and I’ve been trying to wait for X number of days of dryness before ditching the pull ups. She’s a really hard sleeper but as someone else mentioned, I do wonder if she’s just in the habit with the pull up and I wonder how she’d do if we tried to cold turkey it? That said, I have an 8 month old who is a poor sleeper so I’m not ready to try our luck just yet.
SC says
As a counterpoint, my 3 yo was definitely in the habit of peeing in his pull-up during the day, and getting him to go to the potty at all has been a challenge. I really feel like the pull-up was not helpful for him/us. (He’s now in underwear but still has accidents a couple times a week because he doesn’t want to stop playing and waits too long to run to the potty.)
Apparently, though, his body is ready for him to stay dry overnight. Even with the pull-up on, he woke up in the mornings dry for weeks. When we stopped using the pull-ups for day-time and night-time a few months ago, he continued to wake up dry, and he hasn’t had any accidents in bed.
So, I really think that night-time dryness is a physical readiness thing. It’s just not something they consciously do.
Elle says
Thanks for this. When we daytime trained, we didn’t use pull ups for this very reason. Our ped has said day and night are different and night time is a physical readiness thing. It’s just one of those things that makes you wonder though.
anon says
I would talk to the scout leaders and just work out a plan, like a small trash can in the bathroom or something like that. I got my second period right before a scout camp trip (I was 11, so with some kids as young as 8 or 9), and I was super nervous, but someone had stuck paper bags in the outhouse so it wasn’t an issue.
Anonymous says
The Mom Hour podcast just did a whole episode about potty training. One of the things I learned was that overnight dryness is completely different from daytime, and it just won’t happen until a certain hormone kicks on in your kid. There’s no use trying to make it happen before then. It comes on in some kids at 3 (very small percent) and a few more percent have it turned on every year.
Artemis says
I’ve said this before recently, but my oldest son was not dry overnight until he was 7.5. He is an incredibly heavy sleeper, the pediatrician said doing anything but waiting him out was training and torturing me and doing nothing for him, and that it was a brain to bladder pathway issue that happens in all kids at different times. He was wearing a pull-up at night for two years after his younger brother was out of them at night! We were always matter of fact with him about it, explained that it would happen eventually, and it just did. We honestly didn’t talk about it much after he turned 5, it was just something he needed. However, caveat that we never ran into the sleepover or campout issue because the scout campouts he went on involved sleeping in a tent with my husband, so they took care of it in privacy together–is that true for your daughter’s campouts? We kept it very private and reiterated to his younger brother that it was a private issue, and to my knowledge, no one at school or in any of his other activities ever found out. His male cousins found out but didn’t even seem to care about it.
More Sleep Would Be Nice says
Talk to me about winter coats and carseats. We live in a large apartment building and have a parking lot where our cars our located. DS haaaaaaaaate getting into his rear facing Britax, but such is life. It’s a new thing, so hoping it gets better. DH has asked me to toy with the idea to switch to front facing since DS is fine weight-wise, but I refuse.
For those of you in colder climates without garages, how do you manage getting your kid in/out of car/carseat? Do you just bundle them in a blanket and then snap them in carseat in their regular clothes? We went to daycare with the straps buckled over his jacket and vest today and then I googled and saw that it was super dangerous an am now in full on freak out mode. :(
Cb says
They make carseat safe jackets but I’m not convinced it’s worth it unless you’re in a very, very cold climate. We park about a 1-2 minute walk from our flat and just bring him in his normal clothes. It’s sometimes a bit below freezing in the am but it’s such a short time that it doesn’t make sense to bundle and unbundle.
OP says
Thanks. I’m in the D.C.-Area so while it gets cold here, nothing like the Midwest and N.E. This is a good tip, as our actual outside time would be no more than a few minutes…although it will take some selling to DH…
Mama Llama says
I’m in DC and we have just done regular clothes, hat, and a blanket so far this winter. We also have one of those shower cap style warm covers that goes over the baby and the seat, but we haven’t used it yet.
Anonanonanon says
DC area as well. I had a blanket think that went over the carseat and then zipped around baby’s feet but she’s VERY long for her age and her feet hang over the edge of the seat so she kicked it off. I gave up and just do normal clothes, a hat, and a blanket for the daycare trek.
megan says
We use a car seat poncho, but now my little one likes to pull that off while we are driving. But still slightly easier than a blanket.
Anonymous says
How old?
I’d probably do a carseat safe fleece jacket (or now we have a lightwight micro puff thing that we like better – Cat & Jack, but Patagonia makes them too – they flatten to nothing), warm hat that straps under the chin, and mittens. If he is really young, carry him with a blanket around him, too. Otherwise, that will be enough. The hat goes a long way, IMO. We also teach kiddo to put her hands in her pockets when it is cold, and that goes over really well. I like to carry kiddo to the car/house in those situations – keeps both of us warmer. But sometimes she prefers to walk. This might just be my child, but she runs way warmer than me and seems impervious to cold.
OP says
14 months! Thank you.
9:51 Anon says
I’d probably skip the blanket then unless it is very cold. But I’d hold him.
Also, boots. We have kiddo wear boots a lot (even faux Ugg boots that she’ll wear all day) instead of sneakers. Or winter boots and then take her sneakers to school in her backpack.
lsw says
As an aside, the new recommendation for rear-facing is “as long as possible” but I thought the law was until 2 years old, regardless of weight? I’m on team rear-facing until his legs are sticking out the sunroof so I don’t remember the exact legislation.
Anon says
The law varies by state. I have a kid that would get carsick and scream the entire drive. I turned to forward facing once kiddo hit the weight criteria around age 1 for their seat and both issues were 100% resolved. I cringe at the thought of kiddo going through horrible motion sickness for another full year if I were in a state with a 2 year mandate.
Also, for the OP, we dressed kid in normal season clothes and used a blanket to transfer to the car seat. We used remote start to get the car toasty before getting in.
Anonymous says
Law vary. When my oldest was born, it was common to rearface until 1 or 18 months (around 2012) but more recently I don’t think I know anyone that switched to forwardfacing before age 2 and most were closer to 2.5 or 3. In Sweden, rear facing is mandatory until age 4 and they have zero child fatalities from car accidents in most years.
lsw says
Gotcha. Must just be Pennsylvania. I know right when our son was born, they made the law two years; I realize now must be a state law.
Pogo says
We do the Patagonia jacket on the way to daycare since the car itself is freezing when we get in and pretty much the whole way to daycare (so the walk to/from the car isn’t relevant imo). However for longer trips (>20min) where the car will warm up, I just bring him out in a blanket, strap him in, and put the blanket back on. He usually pushes the blanket off himself when he’s warm enough.
Anonymous says
One layer of fleece is fine. Add hat and mitts or just use a hooded fleece jacket. If you want to go warmer, Gap and Northface both have primaloft coats that are car seat safe. We leave an extra fleece blanket in the car to tuck around the kids after they get in.
Anonymous says
We had to bring coats to day care for when they went outside (in buggies or to their play area; they go outside 2x/day in my state). I just draped it over them like a blanket.
AwayEmily says
Our baby is 11 months and we live in a fairly cold area (central NY state). We take him to daycare in a lightweight fleece jacket or a hoodie, and then put a blanket over him once he’s in the car. I’d rather he be a little chilly than unsafe in the carseat, and the car warms up pretty fast. For our older one (2.5) we have a thin down (Patagonia).
RR says
I have my daughter bundle up because we walk the older kids to the bus stop. Then we walk back home, and she takes her coat off in the car. I buckle her up, and then she uses the coat as a blanket. She’s 5 1/2, so she’s front facing. We are toying with the right time to move her to a high-backed booster, which will probably be fairly soon. She’s tall, and when she’s ridden in a high-backed booster in a pinch, she’s very mature about sitting appropriately. (Honestly, I can’t wait to finally be at an end of 11 years of 5 point harness seats.)
Anon says
DC area – I carry my 17 MO to the car and sort of tuck my jacket around her as we walk, and then put a blanket over her once she’s in the seat if the car’s really cold. She runs warm and the car seat gets toasty quickly. I always keep her puffer in the diaperbag so we have it if we need it, but I usually only bother if we’re going to be outside or if the walk from the car to the inside is super long.
GCA says
In NE, and we didn’t have an infant seat at all with my son. We were also in an apartment building and parked in an open-air parking lot. That first December he was 7 months, and the second winter he was 1.5 when it got cold. We would either put him in regular clothes + a heavy fleece/ thin puffy jacket (Uniqlo has thin ‘ultra light down’ kids jackets – not the parka but a lighter weight), or carry him out to the car in a blanket then hustle to buckle him in. Or, one parent would go out and start the car so it warmed up a bit, then the other would run him out and pop him into the carseat.
lsw says
We live in Pittsburgh – it’s cold. We’re still rear-facing with my son, who is 33 pounds and 2.5 years old. Since he has been in the non-infant seat, we have been using solely the Patagonia down sweater jacket that the Car Seat Lady says is OK for carseats. We also use a hat. (Gloves/mittens are a no go with my son.) Our car is parked on the street so it’s definitely cold. We try to warm up the car if possible, but it’s not always. We have a bunting from LL Bean for the stroller and I will occasionally, if it’s SUPER cold, shove his legs in it like a sleeping bag, or swaddle his legs in a blanket. Half the time he just flings this stuff off.
OP says
Ladies, y’all are the best. Seriously. So, DS has this jacket: http://gap.com/browse/product.do?pid=358884012&rrec=true&mlink=5050,12413545,PDP_gapproduct2_rr_10&clink=12413545
I’m going to do my own testing, but I think my options are either a) Let him wear the sherpa part (no vest) in carseat; or b) Put him in without and bundle in blanket, etc. as suggested above. Would love to know if anyone has any experience with this style of jacket.
9:51 Anon says
No experience with this one specifically, but I think you’re on the right track. Seems like a typical fleece. However, I will say that we make a point to buy non-hooded jackets for in the carseat. They get bunched up. When kiddo was 14 months, she’d let us just have the hood up, which worked fine. Now that is a no-go (3 YO), so the hood is just a pain.
Anonymous says
This is likely fine without the vest. I’d just leave the vest off and keep a blanket in the car. The vest is likely adding minimal warmth and just adds bulk under the car seat straps.
lawsuited says
We buy the super compressible down jackets for our son so he can wear it in the car seat. It’s more expensive but definitely worth it to us.
Anonymous says
Also in DC and yeah, it got cold all of a sudden! Our 1.5 year old has a 3-in-1 Cat & Jack jacket from Target. For car trips we use the inner layer (which is thin enough to work in a carseat, but still provides some insulation and windblock) plus a hat and mittens. We also keep a blanket in the car that we use after he’s buckled in. We keep the thick outer jacket at daycare during the week and that’s what they use when they take him outside.
For getting in the carseat, have you tried bribery? Our kids know that they get their (special!) car blanket and their (special!) car toy only after they sit down so they can get buckled in and we can’t turn on the car to turn on the heater or play music until everyone is buckled in. There are still struggles, but reminding them of this series of events helps. At your toddlers age, I highly doubt flipping the carseat would help (and it’s not recommended until at least age 2 anway), since it’s mostly a struggle about being confined, rather than facing backwards.
Anonymous says
Husband is getting a vasectomy today! For those who’s significant others have done this- will he be out of commission all weekend? Just today? Just wondering what to expect.
FVNC says
It definitely varies. My husband, who has a very high pain tolerance, took it easy for the rest of the day, and was fine by the next day. My BIL was out of commission all weekend. Enjoy no BC!
ElisaR says
i’m jealous!
Mrs. Jones says
My husband rested and watched TV the day of and then was fine and just took it a little easy the next two days.
Yay for vasectomies!
Anonymous says
Jealous. My husband (divorced, other-birth-control using, never confirmed) husband discovered his latent Catholocism when we were done having children. I think he’s really just not wanting anyone to see his junk in it’s non-turgid state.
mascot says
Definitely today. I set up my husband with several bags of frozen peas, some junk food, and some magazines. He was good with Advil and regular icing for pain control for the first few days. Kiddo was absolutely not allowed to play roughly near him. Recovery took a little longer than advertised. He was fine for day to day activity pretty quickly, but more physical things (like mowing the lawn) were uncomfortable so I encouraged him to take it easy.
HSAL says
My husband got his done in October and he was definitely out of commission on day 1, but mainly fine day 2 (though he still took off work), and he was still using ice in the evenings for two or three nights after that.
Anonymous says
Definitely today, possibly a little sore through the weekend. My husband stayed home from work for 2 days, and took it easy and watched TV with ice in the evenings for a couple more days after that.
Kitchen stools? says
We are in the final stages of a kitchen renovation and are moving from a kitchen table to an island for the first time. Any recs for kid friendly counter-height stools?
RR says
I love our counter height stools from Ikea. They are the GLENN model. I love them because they look sleek and modern in our kitchen, are stable for the kiddos, and they are a smooth plastic that is the easiest thing in the world to clean. They also stack easily to get them out of the way for sweeping/mopping.
anne-on says
If you have a more traditional style, we have these from Restoration Hardware and really like them. We landed on these after having to replace two prior sets (backless stools + kids = NO), and then heavyset relatives cracked the woven rattan set, so I’d keep that in mind if you were thinking of going that route. With kids, I would also never, ever get fabric ones. The fingerprints and general grime on these on a daily basis kind of amaze me, but hey, they’re cleanable.
https://www.restorationhardware.com/catalog/product/product.jsp?productId=prod2110305&categoryId=search
FVNC says
A friend is undergoing breast cancer treatment and I’m signed up to bring her family a meal next week. She’s got two elementary aged boys, plus her husband, and they don’t have food restrictions or strong preferences. Can anyone suggest specific dishes? My ideas so far are: white chicken chili or an Ina Garten sausage lentil soup recipe. Anything else I can add in for her personally, in case her appetite isn’t great?
Mama Llama says
Both of your ideas sound good. I would include a bread item, like rolls or tortillas. If her appetite isn’t great she might just want plain carbs and the rest of the family can have the main dish.
Anonymous says
lentil soup to me is not a crowd pleaser
Anonymous says
+1. Lentil soup is gross.
anon says
I have to say I agree.
FVNC says
Ha, glad I asked! It’s a staple in our house.
Anon says
So funny! Lentils are a staple of my life, and it’s interesting to see them perceived differently, and good to remember when I prep food for others. As an Indian-American, I find daal (lentils prepared Indian style) to be an ultimate comfort food and kichri (split lentils and rice) is something often served while folks are in recovery (especially recovery from childbirth).
Another win would be an enchilada casserole (no rolling of enchiladas needed, but so warm, gooey, and comforting!).
farrleybear says
I love lentil soup!! I ate a ton of the Amy’s canned stuff when I was pregnant, and make it from scratch pretty regularly now. But I also like the suggestions of a casserole (enchiladas or lasagna maybe) paired with salad and tortillas or bread.
AwayEmily says
Weirdly, I adore daal (we eat it weekly) but agree with the commenters above that I can’t stand most lentil soups.
Anon says
Baked mac & cheese or build your own taco “bar” – bring the cooked meat, some tortillas or shells and some pre-chopped toppings. Everyone can build their own, she can eat what she’s feeling up to. And then bring a salad on the side, because having been there as the recipient with my mom’s cancer, they are dying for fresh vegetables and anything not a casserole.
Anon says
Oh, and you probably already know this, but bring stuff over in a disposable container so that they don’t have to worry about washing it or returning it.
Walnut says
I’ve taken many a taco bar or pan of enchiladas with a gajillion fixings on the side. I always include enough lettuce to give the option of a taco salad and it’s been well received.
Anonymous says
In a similar situation my family really loved the person who brought over roasted chicken pieces and vegetables. It was the kind of normal food we were used to eating and didn’t require assembly or a dressing or multiple pans to reheat, just all in the oven. In NJ, fully 80% of meals were baked ziti and it is now my least favorite food.
FP says
My go-to dinner is Giada’s baked penne with roasted vegetables in the winter, or if you’re looking for something lighter – a sandwich platter with a big bag of chips, a dozen fresh baked cookies, and a crudite platter on the side.
Pogo says
I always do casseroles because they’re easiest – so a lasagna or tuna noodle or a ‘pot pie’ (basically a thick hearty stew with biscuit dumplings on top). Made in a foil casserole dish so they don’t have to return it.
anon says
After my kid was born, someone brought a roasted chicken, a baking dish of mashed potatoes, and a salad. The chicken and mashed potatoes reheated really well in the oven. It was nice to have something that wasn’t a casserole.
FVNC says
Thanks for the input, all! Anon @11:54 — during my second mat leave, a friend brought over roast chicken + cooked veggies, AND a ziplock bag with cut raw veggies and a couple cans of chicken stock to make the leftovers into chicken soup. It was the most amazing gift. Unfortunately I’m not an experienced cook and have never made a roast chicken, so I’m not going to use this occasion as my first try :-)
Anonymous says
One of the meals my in-laws brought us after we had our baby was a hot rotisserie chicken from the grocery store, a bag of rolls, and a bagged salad. It was heavenly.
Anonymous says
Our first night home from the hospital (leaving our preemie in the NICU) a coworker dropped off Whole Foods chicken noodle soup, bread, cheese, and chocolate. Nothing fancy, nothing homemade, but after a week of hospital food it tasted amazing and it was so nice to have something easy to eat and ready-made.
anon says
Has anyone been following the $65.5M settlement of the au pair litigation? Our agency has been very cagey with the details, but I pulled the settlement from Law360. It seems that au pairs and families will now be notified that pay is negotiable, but the minimum stipend hasn’t officially changed.
For us, we already pay our au pair above the minimum, but I’m concerned that future au pairs will threaten rematch to force new pay negotiations after they arrive. Unlike most professional jobs, where your reputation would prevent such gamesmanship, there’s nothing to stop au pairs from working the system. It’s families who are left in a lurch if an au pair decides to play that game.
Sarabeth says
In my reading, there’s also no resolution to the question of whether pay has to be higher to comply with state minimum wage laws, right?
anon says
It wasn’t in the settlement. The entire focus was on letting au pairs know that they don’t have to accept the minimum stipend.
Anonymous says
Really? Your concern here is that vulnerable young women who have just moved to a foreign country are suddenly going to turn into extortioners? I find this concern ridiculous and highly unlikely.
anon says
Huh? I have plenty of concerns about how agencies support au pairs, but they also have nothing to do with the court case. The case did not address issues of maltreatment of au pairs. It wasn’t an issue. I can assure you that I would fully support strengthening support and oversight for treatment of au pairs. The agencies are sketchy.
This post was about my concerns about how agencies will relay the information about the settlement to au pairs and how that information will be understood by au pairs. There are already some au pairs that play games with rematch. It is an issue for families, driving some very good families out of the program.
anne-on says
Yup. Honestly I’ve been calling around to agencies today. I could have understood if the suit focused on tougher screening for families/better oversight, but nope, it was all about pay. If the stipend isn’t going to be fixed (and goodness knows the agencies aren’t cutting their fees) it just isn’t worth it for many families to stay in the program. I refuse to pay games with stipend when we already spend so much time/energy/mental load on interviewing, training, and recruiting these girls. I truly truly feel for those who were mistreated, but if they are SO worried about that happening, why not focus on stronger oversight and not just money?
And I say this as someone who regularly works her au pair well under her hours, pays an over-minimum stipend to cover extras, and includes our au pair in travel, family celebrations, etc. etc. It would be SO much easier to employee a career nanny who I don’t have to mom in addition to employing!
Knope says
I’m genuinely curious then….why DON’T you employee a career nanny?
anne-on says
We “only” need about 30-35 hours a week of coverage, and need/want a split shift (help getting kid off to school in the AM and then afternoon care) which is apparently not desirable in our HCOL suburb and couldn’t get any viable candidates. Plus with snow days, school vacation, and no local family we have no backup for my travel or random sick kid days, so once real school started we got an au pair to fill the gap. My husband is in big finance and simply can’t cover beyond a well planned out work trip here or there (and I travel about 10-14 times a year) plus having morning coverage is really really helpful.
Blueberries says
I totally get that a fixed stipend is appealing to families and the program will likely contract once au pairs get paid a market rate that is at least minimum wage.
However, I think it’s perfectly fair to sue a third party for fixing wages at below minimum wage. Being paid at least minimum wage is a fairly basic right of any employee.
anon says
The minimum wage question is complicated because of how au pairs are compensated. Their stipend ends up being pocket money because the host family covers all actual expenses. We cover housing, food, cell phone, car, car insurance, visa fees, her round trip plane ticket to the US, agency fees, au pair events, education stipend, birthday presents, Christmas presents, meals out with the family, all trips/experiences with the host family, etc. If you only look at the stipend, then she makes less than minimum wage. But that doesn’t really consider her entire compensation. Every cent she receives in her stipend is fun money. She has no expenses whatsoever. Not many 19 yos have $800+ in fun money to spend per month.
In the past year and a half our au pair has afforded trips to NYC, Chicago, Nashville, Boston, Baltimore, Atlanta, Philadelphia, Cleveland, Pittsburgh, Niagara Falls, Houston, San Francisco, Atlantic City, a week in Florida at theme parks, a week in Cancun, and a week in Hawaii, a two week trip home to Europe, and I’m sure I’m missing some. All of this was covered by her stipend. She’s planning an upcoming month long tour at the end of the program across the west, covering Arizona, California, Seattle, and Utah. I’m not saying that she’s getting rich, but she’s admittedly having an amazing experience.
Blueberries says
Does the settlement address just the misrepresentation of the agencies to the au pairs or also the failure to pay minimum wage? I wonder if we’ll see a wave of au pairs pursuing claims against families for paying under minimum wage, especially in states with high minimum wages and with regulatory agencies that pursue wage and hour violations (so the au pair doesn’t have to pay counsel).
This would stink for the families that relied on the representations of the agencies, though only be fair for the au pairs. That’s why families thought it’d be legal to pay so much less than minimum wage, right, because the agencies made that representation?
Also, do families tend to pay employer taxes? Or pay the stipend as if it was tax-free? I wonder if taxing authorities might suddenly take an interest.
anon says
The settlement does not decide whether au pairs need to be paid their state’s minimum wage. If an au pair accepts the settlement, however, it does release the agency and host family from all claims related to au pair’s pay. No double dipping. It doesn’t talk about future au pairs who aren’t part of the settlement.
I’d have to refresh my recollection on the details, but our au pair does pay tax on her income. She doesn’t pay Medicare or SS tax because she’s a nonresident alien. Similarly, because most au pairs are nonresident aliens, their host families are exempt from paying federal unemployment taxes on their au pair wages. It’s all above board.
Kids' Table and Chairs says
My daughter is 3. So far her playroom table has been a Step2 picnic table. We’re redoing the playroom, and upgrading to a table and chair set. My question is, how long do the “first” sets last – like the Pottery Barn My First Table and Chairs set and the small Ikea ones (the Sundvik sets)? At about what age will we need to switch over to a bigger set, such as the regular kids Pottery Barn stuff? I’m trying to decide if I can justify buying the Pottery Barn one, which I strongly prefer from an aesthetic perspective. Thank you!!
CHL says
I got a pottery barn one used from a mom group and find it very sturdy. My 6 year old uses it still for coloring, puzzles, lego sets etc. and I could see that lasting another couple years as well. I think there’s two different heights, the taller one might be a little high for her now but soon will be fine.
OP says
Thanks! I’m less worried about it holding up over time and more worried about her outgrowing the smaller set before I feel like I’ve gotten my $200 out of the PB Kids one. I’m wondering if I should just get the Ikea one now even though I think it is ugly and then in a year or two get a big PB Kids one that we’ll have longer. I’m just wondering at what age she’ll need the bigger one (which I realize now I didn’t phrase well in my original post).
Anonymous says
We got the regular PB Kids set at 18 months. It worked fine at that age and still looks great 10 years later.
H13 says
We have a hand-me-down PB table and chairs. They are about 10+ years old, look great and are used by my 2 and 5 years old. I think the 5 yo will use it another year maybe and then be too big. He does most of his “work” (everything from writing, coloring, lego building, etc.) on the ground or at the dining room table anyway.
GCA says
Wise hive – for those of you who have dealt with milk/ soy protein intolerance in your LOs, how did you a) start solids and b) reintroduce dairy and soy into your diet? On ped’s suggestion, I was planning to reintroduce soy, reintroduce dairy and then start solids, in that order. But I’ve been taking small amounts of soy (eg soy sauce in noodles) for a week and baby is spitting up and has blood in poop again. She’s 5 months – I was hoping to do the reintroductions slowly before starting solids in a month. We have an allergist appointment but that’s months away… thank you!
Anonymous says
Hello! My son had milk and wheat intolerances; when we started solids I just stayed away from foods containing such ingredients (5 months). Then around 9 or 10 months I introduced a little bread the. A little yogurt into my diet first (was still nursing); they get less of it that way than eating directly so good as a trial run—he’d outgrown them. I think 5 months is prob too early to outgrow intolerances; circa 9 months is on the early end I’ve been told…some kids have them for a year or two so waiting to start solids until they’ve grown out of it might not be possible
Anonymous says
I’m on my second baby with MSPI. I don’t remember how we introduced them as solids, but I do recall that my first could not handle either until 12 months (dairy) and 15 months (soy). Soy seemed like a harsher irritant than dairy for him. I’ve noticed that soy is tougher for my second kid as well. That makes sense, as I noticed when I started eating dairy and soy again that soy irritated me considerably, but dairy didn’t really.
Walnut says
We re-introduced dairy in small amounts around 18 months and settled into a “dairy-light” routine by about 2.5?
Anonymous says
Start with more processed forms of the foods. At least for dairy, cooking with wheat for at least 20 mins to at least 375F breaks apart the proteins that cause the allergy. Try muffins that have 1/2 cup milk per 12 muffins and work up from there.
Eggos also have a small amount of milk. My daughter passed the baked milk test at the hospital and tolerates eggos fine. Soy sauce is relatively concentrated and uncooked. Try a granola bar with soy lectin as an ingredient. On dairy, regular cow’s milk is most likely to cause a reaction, try milk in baked goods or yoghurt first.
GCA says
Thanks all! We’ve established that soy lecithin and soyabean oil in my diet (she’s currently on a diet of 100% breast milk) are ok, at least, so I was attempting to go a step or two up on the soy ladder (this seems to be more well-known in the UK than the US – a UK friend recommended it). I’ll do the ladder thing for her own diet when she’s older, but it sounds like she’s too young right now to have outgrown the intolerance so we’ll just start her on avocados and squash and such, and try again in a couple of months…
Anonymous says
Is there an actual infographic or similar soy ladder? Could you link? Would love to see if they have something similar for dairy. Our allergist has encouraged us to try more but didn’t give much guidance and kid is old enough to be wary of reactions so looking for ideas on what to try next with less likelihood of causing a reaction.
GCA says
The dairy ones are easier to find if you google around for reputable sources! Here’s one from a UK NHS source: https://allergynorthwest.nhs.uk/resources/allergy-leaflets/cows-milk-reintroduction-milk-ladder/ The soy ones are similar.
Anonymous says
Thanks! This is great.
Cb says
Yeah, the ladder thing was what the dietician recommended here in the UK.
Cb says
We are doing reintroduction now at 17 months. The recommended schedule in the UK is one.week of baked milk or butter (brioche), one of boiled milk, one of hard cheese, and then proper milk. They recommended waiting until 1 year to reintroduce and wait 3 months if there was a reaction.
RR says
My youngest had a milk protein allergy. We did no dairy until 1, when we eased into it and she had grown out of it.
Anonymous says
My oldest was MSPI and I was dairy and soy free from the time she was 2 weeks old until when she was 4.5 months and I had the flu and accidentally drank a 100% soy protein shake. She was fine. I called the ped. Ped said cool, wait a week and try dairy.
Without that accidental trial I’d have waited until 6 months or so.
Flu exposure says
My 4 month old has potentially been exposed to influenza A. I know the flu is common (and going around) but I’m a little freaked out anyway. I should just wait and see if he gets symptoms, right? I’m trying to resist the urge to overreact, but it scares me when they’re too young to have had the shot.
AwayEmily says
It is scary! A maybe reassuring anecdote: Influenza A hit my baby’s classroom a few months ago (some of the first reported cases in our county, actually). He came down with it, as did most of the other babies in the class. They were all just fine and mine was fever-free and back at school in 3 days. It seems like a pretty mild strain this year.
Flu exposure says
Thank you! This is comforting. I’m trying to remember that most cases are not that severe. It’s just scary when they’re so little especially.
Anonymous says
Yes just wait and see!
Everlong says
Call your ped! My husband was a confirmed case last year and they prescribed kids’ version of Tamiflu in a preventative dosage for my then 4 month old and his slightly older brother. I imagine that depends on the circumstance, but it was a huge help for my mental health to know we were doing everything we could.
Anonymous says
I’d call your pediatrician and ask. I think preventive Tamiflu isn’t viewed as positively as it once was, because it has some side effects and is raging expensive. But at that age, and going into the weekend, I’d call and ask what they recommend. We did Tamiflu last year with our then 2 year old who they thought had influenza 6 days before we left for Mexico. We really wanted to do what we could to avoid needing healthcare there and were considering taking advantage of our trip insurance if she wasn’t better before we left. It all worked and we had a great vacation.
Anonymous says
There’s nothing you can do at this point – so sadly, it’s one of those “don’t worry until there’s something to worry about” situations. One thing I didn’t know – I took my daughter in for flu last year, assuming they’d want her on tamiflu of course cause she was like 9 months old (and had been vaccinated). I learned that the side effects for little ones can be very severe (hallucinations) and generally pediatricians don’t want them on it unless they’re hospitalized. In the meantime you can stock up on boogie wipes, Tylenol, and pedialyte just in case.
Anonanonanon says
I’m going to caveat this with I am high-risk (immunocompromised and have severe asthma), my older one has asthma, and we can already tell my 10-month-old will, so I am on team “overract”
BUT I would at least call the pediatrician and let them know, and ask their advice. I don’t think they’ll do prophylactic tamiflu that young (they gave it for my 7-year-old last year, though) but it’s good to check. I’d at least ask them what you should look out for in particular, and what the “trigger point” should be for bringing her in rather than just riding it out.
Anonymous says
How can I get my just-turned-four-year-old to stop sucking his thumb? The dentist has not seemed too worried in the past, so we haven’t really intervened, but we were just at his one-year physical, and the doc thinks it’s affecting his teeth and his speech, and I think she’s right. It’s high time that he stopped, but he gets really stressed out by even talking about how to stop :( He sucks his thumb at night, but also during the day (mostly when he is self-soothing, but not an insignificant amount of time). Anything that has worked for you?
Anonymous says
My experience is with soothers not thumbs but we had success with first limiting it to bed. Not allowing it during daytime, just for falling asleep and then working on getting rid of it at bedtime once reliance was reduced. A friend with a thumb sucker has success by placing an adult sized sock over the kid’s hand after they were asleep. Kid generally fell asleep using thumb but got used to not using it at night and then didn’t need it to fall asleep anymore.
It’s a self soothing mechanism so try and find something to help him replace that self soothing during the day. A cuddle with a stuffie or fav blankie may help.
Anonymous says
Thanks very much for these ideas. I like all of them.
H13 says
My son stopped right around five. I found that anything I did to try and limit it before he was ready just caused a power struggle. When we talked about it and he was ready, we did bandaids on his thumb. He got to pick out a bunch of fun ones and we did a sticker chart too. It took about six weeks for him to say he was ok with going without a bandaid.
One thing I noticed is that he was more prone to sucking his thumb when he had his lovey. I wish I would have started by keeping his lovely in his bed so that we could have tried to eliminate the daytime part sooner.
Good luck. I HATED the thumb sucking and am so glad we are passed it. (Though I have caught him once or twice in the 6ish months since he stopped.)
Anonymous says
So glad to hear a relatively pain-free success story! Interesting about the lovey — my inclination was to try to make sure he had more access to the lovey as a replacement soothing mechanism, but they are certainly correlated for my son too.
Artemis says
My guy didn’t stop thumb sucking until 4. Redirecting to a satin-bordered lovey that he could rub on his lips helped. We also would go in after he fell asleep and pull his thumb out of his mouth, and eventually once we did that it would stay out the rest of the night. When we were really at the peak of needing to break the habit, we got Mavala nail polish on Amazon. It is clear and tastes terrible, but we did it as a cooperative thing, as in “you need help breaking this habit and that’s ok, this is going to help remind you because you can’t do it on your own, that’s what a habit is” and not a shaming thing.
Anonymous says
My mom successfully bribed me with a cabbage patch kid around age 5. I also did sock on the hand for bedtime.