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When I wanted to switch my son’s usual shampoo last year, I asked what they use at the kids’ salon we go to — and the answer was this product from Amika. I liked it so much that it’s become my shampoo, too.
This makes my hair really shiny and soft — and I love Amika’s “signature scent,” which is apparently “a proprietary blend of orange and grapefruit blossom mixed with sandalwood spice, geranium, and rose.” with “hints of amber, tonka bean and vanilla.” Okay then.
The shampoo also has a ton of “clean” cred: It’s free of sulfates SLS and SLES, parabens, formaldehydes and formaldehyde-releasing agents, phthalates, triclosan, and many more potentially harmful ingredients. It’s also vegan and cruelty-free!
Normcore shampoo is $16 for 8 oz. at Sephora. More sizes are available at loveamika.com: $9 for 2 oz., $16 for 8 oz., and $19 for 10 oz. It’s also available at some salons. (Amika also makes a Normcore conditioner, but I haven’t tried it.) Normcore Sulfate-Free Shampoo
Sales of note for 3.28.24
(See all of the latest workwear sales at Corporette!)
- Ann Taylor – Up to 40% off your full-price purchase; extra 50% off sale
- Banana Republic Factory – 50-70% off everything plus extra 20% off purchase
- Eloquii – 50% off 2+ items; 40% off 1
- J.Crew – 50% off select styles
- Lands’ End – 10% off your order
- Loft – 50% off everything
- Nordstrom: Give $150 in gift cards, earn a $25 promo card (ends 3/31)
- Talbots – 40% off 1 item; 25% off everything else
- Zappos – 37,000+ women’s sale items! (check out these reader-favorite workwear brands on sale, and some of our favorite kids’ shoe brands on sale)
Kid/Family Sales
- Carter’s – 50% off entire site
- Hanna Andersson – 30% off all swim; up to 30% off HannaJams
- J.Crew Crewcuts – 40% off sitewide; 50% off select swim; 50% off kids’ styles
- Old Navy – 50% off Easter deals
- Target – 20% off Easter styles for all; up to 30% off kitchen & dining; BOGO 50% off shoes & slippers for the family;
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And — here are some of our latest threadjacks of interest – working mom questions asked by the commenters!
- If you’re a working parent of an infant with low sleep needs, how do you function at work when you’re in the throes of baby’s sleep regression?
- Should I cut my childcare down to 12 hours a month if I work from home?
- Will my baby have speech delays if we raise her bilingual?
- Has anyone given birth in a teaching hospital?
- My child eats everything, and my friends’ kids do not – how should I handle? In general, what is the best way to handle when your child has some skill/ability and your friend’s child doesn’t have that skill/ability?
- ADHD moms, give me your tips to help with things like behavior in the classroom, attention to detail, etc?
- I think I suffer from mom rage…
- My husband and kids are gone this weekend – how should I enjoy my free time?
- I’m struggling to be compassionate with a SAHM friend who complains she doesn’t have enough hours of childcare.
- If you exclusively formula fed, what tips do you have for in the hospital and coming home?
- Could I take my 4-yo and 8-yo on a 7-8 day trip to Paris, Lyon, and Madrid?
SAT / ACT prep books recommendations says
Good morning!
Would anyone like to recommend books for prepping for the SAT or ACT?
Thank you!
Anon says
I would check out a bunch from the library and see ones ones they like best. They will probably have them all.
Ifiknew says
We live in an urban area of the city and I just have hit my breaking point after 9 months with a 3 yr old and 1 yr old in a townhome without a yard. We’re moving to a small suburban Rental next to both sets of grandparents.
My 3 year old and 1 year old have their rooms offset by a floor currently so they usually don’t wake each up when one cries in the middle of the night or wakes up early etc. In this new house, their rooms will be next to each other. They both have a sound machine currently, is there anything I can do for sleep to help them stay rested? They just don’t both consistently sleep and stay asleep motn so this is a huge concern for me that sleep issues will get even worse.
Spirograph says
Gently, don’t borrow trouble. My kids have shared a room since infant/toddler years and although they weren’t great sleepers and woke ME up a lot more than I preferred, it was very rare for them to wake each other up. I guess their sleep cycles were just offset in a lucky way that one’s wakeup coincided with the other’s deep, log-like sleep phase?
There is very little else you can do aside from keeping doors closed and using a sound machine, but this is probably sufficient.
Good luck with the move, and enjoy your new outdoor space and proximity to grandparents!
Anon says
I think you may be pleasantly surprised this isn’t a big deal at all, especially with separate rooms. Even kids who wake up in the middle of the night for strange reasons or no reason at all can sometimes surprise you by sleeping through way more than you would have expected. My 2 year old sleeps through the dog barking loudly all the time and she’s not generally a heavy sleeper (she quit napping at daycare really early because the room was never dark/quiet enough).
Anonymous says
Don’t borrow trouble. This might not even happen!
Anne says
Natural consequences? My four year old shares a room with my one year old and is VERY careful not to wake her up when she wakes up because the four year old hates listening to crying just as much as we do. The one year old basically never wakes the four year old up with her crying – the four year old sleeps through it.
Anon says
I think they’ll be fine, if not immediately then quickly. My kids are terrible sleepers, but they don’t wake each other up (two share a room, one next door). Wake ME up all the time though.
The exception is morning -they all wake each other up in the morning, but I suspect they’d do that no matter how far apart they were!
Anonymous says
Agreed it may not be an issue if they aren’t sharing rooms.
My kids (5, 3) have shared a room for about six months after a move. One of them is up and crying at some point roughly every other night. Half the time, that crying wakes the other kid. The only times that kid hasn’t been able to go immediately back to sleep is when my younger wakes my older within an hour of their normal wake-up time. Last night, my five year old woke up my three year old at 5:30; 3 year old was back asleep immediately and five year old was back asleep within a half hour.
Op says
Thanks all, so helpful as always. So many good tips.
So depressing that so many of our kids far past the infant stage are waking up so frequently at night :( not sure when it ever gets better!
Anonymous says
1016 anon here. My kids’ poor sleep is largely our fault as parents; we got them into terrible sleep habits. Now that we’ve been able to make headway on those, we’re entering “bad dreams” territory with my older kid.
Anon says
Mine has been a terrible sleeper since birth. Now at 3 she wakes up once a night and is allowed to crawl into our bed as long as she doesn’t wake us up (which I would say 75 percent of the time I sleep through her joining us, and DH sleeps through everything). Most nights she makes it 7 or 8 hours before crawling in with us, other nights it’s only 3 or 4. I figure she won’t still be sleeping with us in college, so it will end eventually and this approach gives us the most sleep for the most number of people.
Anon says
you could always put an extra sound machine right outside each of their rooms
ElisaR says
i had to move my 2 and 4 yr old boys into the same room in June due to construction. I had concerns but really it has been fine. They don’t even always wake up at the same time. They have adjusted and I’m not sure they are going to want to go back to their own rooms when construction is done.
note to selves: construction projects during a pandemic are a pain in the…….
Anonymous says
My advice would be to drop the sound machines when you move. They are such a terrible crutch, and I think build bad habits. Kids learn to sleep just fine without them. But that’s just it–they have to learn. A sleep machine is the easy way out of that process.
AwayEmily says
Really? Is there empirical evidence for them building bad habits? I am willing to believe it, but we haven’t seen anything of the sort. My kids use sound machines because we live in a very small house and they share a room, but they also nap fine at daycare without them, and have never had an issue sleeping without them when they travel. If anything, their loveys are more “crutches” than noise machines in that they need them to sleep…but I don’t think I’d be comfortable taking their loveys away.
Anon says
“Terrible” is overstating it, in my view, but I feel like sleep experts have definitely been talking about potential downsides of them for a while. This article summarizes some of the potential pros and cons. https://www.healthline.com/health/parenting/white-noise-for-babies#importance-of-sleep The point about damaging hearing is a bigger issue for me than that they might potentially be habit-forming. Most people I know use them at levels that I think are potentially damaging for babies’ ears.
Also, if your kids can sleep without it at daycare and on vacation, then why do you need it at home? I don’t really understand why it’s needed unless you can’t fall asleep without it, and if you can’t fall asleep without it then it’s by definition a sleep crutch (but sleep crutches aren’t all bad).
Anon Lawyer says
I’ve seen that study but the recommendations are: “Based on the findings of the AAP, pediatricians recommend that any white noise machines should be placed at least 7 feet away (200 cm) from your baby’s crib. You should also keep the volume on the machine below the maximum volume setting.”
I just put it on the opposite end of the room from the crib and only keep the volume half way up. It doesn’t seem that hard to follow these guidelines.
Anon. says
I want to push back on this respectfully. Is it really a “terrible” crutch and bad habit? I guess in my thinking, it is so easy to create white noise to help a person sleep whether at home, while traveling, or in a strange room at Grandma’s house. A free cell phone app or a portable sound machine ($15) can be available almost anytime anywhere. As an adult I can tell you that adding the noise machine (which we implemented with the first kid) means I sleep much better at my parents’ house because I don’t hear all the weird noises there anymore. A pillow is a sleep crutch too, right? Unlikely that this crutch/habit is harming or stopping anyone else from sleeping. I guess it’s one more thing to forget when traveling, but other than that what’s the downside?
Anon says
A pillow is meant to help support spinal alignment.
Boston Legal Eagle says
Also have to push back on this – I myself sleep with a white noise machine every night because I don’t like the minor house and husband snoring sounds when I sleep. I guess it’s a crutch but so what? It helps me sleep.
Op says
Yeah so disagree with this anon. I am not looking to remove anything that helps my very irrational children sleep. As they get older and can be remotely be reasoned with, we can remove if it is such an issue.
Anonymous says
Need a reality check! My daughter did little kid soccer this summer and really liked it- lots of silly games and drills. She is doing the 4-5 year old class this fall, and still really likes it, although I think the coach is a little out of touch. He treats them like they’re teenagers, and I’m not sure she’s actually learning anything about soccer or team sports- yesterday he had them doing push-ups (!) due to “lack of focus.” The parent next to me said wow that’s a great way to make kids quit sports. Worth emailing the program head to see if the last half can be a little more age-appropriate? Or just let it go because she is still having a good time despite the ridiculous expectations? WWYD?
anne-on says
Any chance there are other programs in your area that are more geared towards play and less towards competition? Otherwise I’d keep your kiddo in if she is otherwise enjoying it.
My son is older, and not super ‘sporty’ and we’re having a REALLY hard time finding any ‘rec league’ type of options – it’s either you play sports with the idea of getting to an elite level (away games, travel teams, off-season coaching all starting very young) or not at all. It’s super frustrating and I really haven’t seen any good options for casual acquisition of skills.
AIMS says
I think it’s worth it. My daughter did soccer with two coaches one year – a man and a woman – and loved it. Then the next class was just one guy and she just didn’t enjoy it as much. I think at this early age it’s as much about how much they like the instructor as he subject so it can’t hurt.
Clementine says
Is it volunteer coaches? With volunteer coaches, I am pretty chill because otherwise, I’m gonna be the one ending up doing it.
I say that if your kid enjoys it, go with it. Ask around and see if there are more chill options if that’s what you’re looking for.
Also, FWIW, as somebody who has coached ages 5-college at various points, sometimes if everything is off the rails, getting them all to do the same activity (e.g, pushups in this case) is a really valid way to get them back on track. I’d be more worried if they were berating them or were nasty or like… correcting their ‘push-ups’. (I would probably have used something else like clapping, but I would focus more on ‘is it punitive or just an activity?’)
NYCer says
I agree with all of this. Doing push-ups isn’t necessarily a bad “reset” if it is used as such. If the coach is screaming at them during the push-up segment (or otherwise), then I would definitely be concerned.
Also, OP if your daughter is still enjoying the class, I would be inclined to just let it go. Maybe she will end up with a different teacher in the next session?
Spirograph says
I agree, too. My kids love to do “push ups” (and they are hilarious to watch). They don’t have the cultural context that drop and give me 20 is a punishment, and might very well see it like just the next random instruction in a game of Simon Says. It totally depends on how the coach is delivering it. The fact that OP is concerned makes me think there might be something about the tone that’s off-putting or inappropriate, but coaching is a skill and not my area of expertise, so I don’t second-guess if my kids are happy.
Anonymous says
I think you should speak to the coach directly instead of complaining behind his back.
Anonymous says
OP- thanks all. To provide more info, it is not volunteer coaches (if it was I definitely wouldn’t complain!), and the coach has made it pretty clear he is not interested in feedback from parents.
Anonymous says
Oh then I would absolutely complain!
Clementine says
With this context, you’re totally in the right to go look for another team/league. I probably wouldn’t pull a kid out mid-season but I’d look for something that was a better fit.
Anon says
I guess I’m in the minority, but that would pretty horrifying to me and I would probably email and/or pull my kid if the email response wasn’t adequate. I have a lot of experience in a sport that’s famous for abusing child athletes though, so I’m probably more sensitive to coach-athlete interactions than most. I think using push-ups as punishment is completely inappropriate for 4-5 year olds. At that age, sports should be play-based and fun and if a child is distracted or disobeying to the point that they’re interfering with the class, the appropriate response is for the kid to wait on the sidelines until they’re ready to rejoin the group.
Anonymous says
+1 although without the personal sports background. I find this totally inappropriate for 4-5 year olds who are there to have fun, and I would be pretty livid. They shouldn’t be punished at all! They’re preschoolers! Imagine if a daycare teacher did this.
Anonymous says
If she still really likes it and hasn’t complained about the structure or push-ups, it might not be an issue. I was surprised at the structure around my 4-5 y.o. t-ball practices this fall, but the coach was fantastic my kids loved him and seemed to like doing the calisthenics with the group. It’s more about how the kids are responding to the coaching than what the asks/activities are.
If your daughter has expressed disappointment or frustration, it’s worth bringing up. My husband recently did this about my son’s 8-and-under hockey team after my son started getting grumbly about practices not being fun this year. DH emailed the coach and suggested that there be more skating games and time set aside each practice for a scrimmage, and less focus on strict drills. The coach was very receptive to the feedback and implemented it at the next practice — the response has been incredibly positive from the parents and kids. If the coaching is age-inappropriate in a way that’s turning the kids off, you’ll be doing everyone a favor by speaking up!
Anonymous says
It’s ridiculous. My husband couches a U6 team of 4/5 year olds and has coached soccer for K and 1 for several years. Nobody focuses!! at those ages they should be focused on ball control and the coach should be keeping them busy so they dont have time to pick daises.
Frankly, it should *all* be silly games and drills with a scrimmage at the end. The U6 league we play in is 25 minutes drills/practice and 30 minute game (15 min halves). And THAT is a lot!
Clementine says
Win for the week. My inlaws are so hard to shop for. I’ve done all the normal things, the outside the box things, the thoughtful things.
Well, my MIL was asking if I watched The Crown because she’d heard it was so good. She was lamenting that she couldn’t get it at the library. I offered to get them Netflix for Christmas.
…She was SO EXCITED. GUYS. I’m DONE shopping for them. I just need to give them their annual picture of the kids and that’s it.
TheElms says
This is genius and congrats on your win!!
Anon says
Ah so good!
anne-on says
Congratulations!
My parents and in-laws are nightmares to shop for (all the SILs have a group chat about gifting and we regularly despair over how hard they are to shop for). It occurred to me to just get both sets a 3-month subscription food box via goldbelly. They get yummy treats that aren’t more ‘stuff’ and I don’t have to wrap or ship anything, win win! My brother chimed in to the text chat to lament that he’s kicking himself for not thinking of this first ;)
Mrs. Jones says
I am happy for you and your inlaws. My MIL is also so hard to shop for.
AnotherAnon says
What kind of gel do you use on your kids’ hair? I just want something that will keep the cow licks at bay but won’t damage his hair.
Anon says
For kiddo’s curly hair, we do this – not sure if it is enough hold for you but definitely helps define her curls: https://www.target.com/p/johnson-39-s-curl-defining-leave-in-conditioner-6-8-fl-oz/-/A-54643331
Anon says
started potty training our 2.5 year old twins over the weekend. it was hilarious and exhausting all at the same time. we are trying the oh crap method. i had not spent that much time in the bathroom since i was pregnant with them. and did anyone have kids who were over zealous. they were so excited, that they just wanted to play in the bathroom all day and wash their hands. obviously sitting on the potty all day doesn’t teach them how to recognize signals from their bodies. how long after you started can you leave the house again like normal people?
ElisaR says
congrats! i’d say it was about a week before we went anywhere…. but we still travel with a to-go potty.
Anonymous says
Why do you need to leave the house? Half kidding, but I feel like the pandemic is the perfect time for potty training because no one is really going anywhere now.
OP says
oh we have no place to go. we are taking covid very seriously and only go to places outside where we can be far away from other people, but we live in the south where now is when the weather is nicest and i am not looking to go anywhere particularly exciting, but would love to take a walk for an hour or drive to look at holiday lights or go to a park or something. we live in an apartment and don’t have our own outdoor space and it’s hard not to go outside all day!
Anonymous says
Get the potette travel potty and hit the road! that’s what we did with our twins. it folds out into a tiny potty and the pee collects into a trash bag with a pee pad at the bottom. a little past three years old, the natural/cultural need for privacy will kick in, along with a little more body awareness that will allow you to find a restroom.
anon says
I didn’t use oh crap, and I know you’re not supposed to use pull ups with it, but this is why I did pull ups.
Anonymous says
It shouldn’t be too long before you can leave the house for an hour or two at a time. For long road trips, I was pretty shameless about using pull-ups, although I think that’s officially a no-no.
Anon says
I’m a big fan of the Oxo travel potty. It makes going out to the park/on walks so much easier!
Sf says
We’ve been potty trained for more than six months and still keep to oxo travel potty in the car. Great way to avoid him touching everything in a public bathroom. And an easy ooo solution for road trips. We also used it for pee on the go until he learned to pee standing up.
CCLA says
Yep we have a few of those and they were crucial – one in each car and another in the main stroller. Our 4yo doesn’t need it any more other than road trips but the 2yo will soon, so we’ve just left it. As far as walks, we were also in an apartment for potty training. After the first few days, we just went out and popped that thing up behind a bush when nature called for our then almost 3yo. The oxo one folds out to go on top of big seats or will stand alone with a bag…bring lots of extra bags, hand sanitizer, and a pack of wipes.
anon says
We’re transitioning my 12 month old from formula to cow’s milk and he’s doing fine with it. But he doesn’t eat very much solid food. I mean, he eats solid food, but I’m worried that if we leave off completely with the formula, he won’t be getting enough nutrients from WCM and the little solid food he does eat. Is this something to be concerned about or will he just work it out on his own?
TheElms says
In theory your kid should drink much less cow’s milk than they drank formula. ( I say theory because well toddlers.) And yes, they will gradually eat more and it will likely happen on its own.
To the extent it helps, this is what I did. I have an 18 month old now. After we transitioned from BM to formula around 9 months, she drank about 30-36 ounces of formula a day (in 5 bottles a day I think). As she ate more solid food that volume decreased without me doing anything until we got to about 24-28 ounces of formula. Around 11 months I recall cutting out a bottle and offering water instead to get it down to around 18-24 ounces a day (3 bottles of 6-8 ounces each). It took us about 2 months to transition from formula to milk and as part of that I cut out one more bottle. So by around 15 months she had just a morning 6 oz bottle and a evening 6 oz bottle. Then we transitioned to cups (we had been offering cups (all different types) since 6 months but made no real progress until around 15 months when all of a sudden it became no big deal and she would just drink from a straw cup). And between 11 and 15 months her food intake increased gradually to compensate for the lower volume of formula/milk. Now at 18 months she drinks anywhere from 12-15 ounces of milk and eats everything in sight (except when she doesn’t because toddler).
Anon says
Usually this works itself out. As they fill up less on liquid, they are hungrier for solids. I’d aim for 16 oz of milk a day (more than that can inhibit iron absorption) and serve him regular meals and snacks of solid food. This is a transition period – don’t worry about nutrition for a few weeks, just see how he’s doing.
LL Bean says
Will LL Bean have a Black Friday sale? I’m looking for an X% off everything situation. Is that going to happen, or should I just order what I want now? Thanks in advance!
Clementine says
It usually does, but my experience is that LLBean has a lot of things that sell out and aren’t restocked until well into January. I might buy it now and then return and buy at the lower price if there’s a sale for that reason.
anon says
In need of advice for a good thank you gift!
Friends threw me a surprise virtual baby shower (someone decorated home while we were out; friends joined on zoom; all attendees received a box of homemade treats/appetizers to enjoy together over zoom) and I’d like to send thank you gifts to the hostess and planners. Budget $50 for hostess and $15-20 for others involved in planning (flexible). Any ideas? Preference is for something practical but also fun.
Anne says
A treat from milk bar?
AwayEmily says
Something consumable (Zingermans?). But you can’t go wrong with just a heartfelt hand-written note to each of them describing your favorite parts of the shower, how surprised you were, what great friends they are, and how much this means to you in the current stressful time we’re all in. And if you want to buy them something, awesome, but I think a card is all that’s really needed here.
Anon says
I agree – a thank you note is plenty (maybe with a holiday treat consumable). I kind of hate getting gifts from friends/hostess gifts/gift culture in general because I feel pressured to reciprocate in the future. Clearly gifts are not my love language.
Dinos says
Any gift ideas for the 4 year old boy who loves dinosaurs? He already has a set of figures.
Anon says
I saw dinosaur taco holders on a couple of gift lists this season, if you guys eat tacos regularly.
Anon says
Oh, and my dino loving daughter has a pair of dinosaur jammies from Hanna Andersson. Hers are orange, but it looks like they have a navy print in big kids sizes now.
AwayEmily says
My 4yo loves the Melissa & Doug “Dinosaur Dawn” floor puzzle. Also, 4 is old enough to handle pop-up books and there are some cool dinosaur ones.
Spirograph says
Ooooh ooh, me! I have a 4 year old boy who loves dinosaurs, too. Some of his favorites:
1. Dinosaur stuffed animals
2. a remote-controlled walking, roaring T rex that breathes smoke
3. A dinosaur park kit : search for “Dinosaur Paradise Play Set Box” (it includes more figurines, but you can’t have too many dinosaurs, from his standpoint)
4. Subscription to ZooDinos (zoobooks magazine)
5. Any of a number of dino books. Some current favorites “A Boy Wants a Dinosaur” “I’m a T-Rex”
6. Wee Sing Dinosaur Songs CD (also available on google play/youtube music, if you subscribe)
7. Dinosaur costumes. We have a zip up PJ like thing with a hood, a fabric velociraptor head hat, and a little costume kit from Michaels that has a velcro tail, some little claw mittens and a headband with spikes on it
Anonymous says
Books? We have about four Dino books out from the library right now. I’d recommend “crunch, the shy dinosaur”, which is really fun to read as a parent. My kids like “Tiny t. Rex and the Impossible hug” too.
Anon says
you could do one of those activity boxes that have themes, from youngwildandfriedman or apopofliteracy. i think they have dinosaur themed ones
Dinos says
Thank you so much, everyone!
octagon says
Sleep help please. Kiddo (5) has had intermittent nightmares that woke him up over the past few months, but has said more recently that all his dreams are “scary.” He has completely given up napping because he’s afraid to go to sleep in the middle of the day. Nighttime is challenging for everyone because he just doesn’t want to go to sleep – he will stay awake really late talking to himself or singing. He says he would like to stay up all night because that way there will be no bad dreams. He’s perpetually exhausted and I just feel so bad for him.
We’ve tried bad dream spray (scented spray), talking about how dreams are just imaginary (which he understands logically, but emotionally can’t get there), one of us sitting in his room until he falls asleep, letting the dog sleep in his room to chase away bad dreams… nothing works.
Is this a normal phase? Suggestions for how to get through it?
Anonymous says
I assume you’re tried a nightlight? I think it’s both common and normal and something worth discussing with the pediatrician since it’s been going on a while and is interfering with sleep.
octagon says
Yes, I should have mentioned that – he has a good nightlight, and a fan runs. We usually play classical piano music when the lights go out. We tried stopping that but he didn’t like no music.
Anonymous says
Focus on what things he should think about. It’s hard to not think about something (scary dream) unless you have something positive to think about. When middle kid went through some nightmare issues we made a habit of talking through 5 nice things to think about. We taught him to touch each finger on one hand as he thinks about them (he picked ice cream, playing trains, going swimming, building sand castles, cupcakes).
blueberry says
I like the thinking about nice things idea, I definitely still use that as an adult.
When I was that age my parents got me a dreamcatcher and told me it would catch the bad dreams and they would get destroyed by the sun’s light the next morning. Probably not the most PC thing anymore but it helped immensely, more than they even know.
Anon says
My parents should have taken me to a sleep neurologist. For me this was an early sign of issues that I didn’t get answers for until I was much older.
Anon says
How do you tactfully suggest specific gifts when you’re asked for suggestions? Last year I sent an Amazon wishlist but I got feedback that it was rude because it was too registry-like. I can think of lots of specific things my preschooler would like, but few “general categories” that are very safe. For example, she loves art but I don’t want to suggest arts and crafts in general and end up with something super messy or that requires a lot of parental involvement. Or aother example is she loves Duplos but has a lot already so I don’t know how to avoid duplication without requesting specific sets. Pretend food for a play kitchen is about the only category I can think of where a gift giver really can’t go wrong, and my parents pretty much have that covered (they saved a lot of stuff from my childhood).
Anonymous says
I’d build yourself an Amazon list as a reference then use it as a base for the email. The link with prices attached was probably too much for some folks. So instead of linking your top three duplo sets, I tend to do more “Jane loves playing with lego duplo (already have a house set but a construction or garden set out be great), she also really likes books by – list favorite authors. Jane loves arts and crafts – she has lots of crayons and paper but extra paints, new beads or other craft supplies would be great. Thanks for thinking of her!”
Basically list the category and mention a couple examples of what would be good and an example of what you have already.
If I got duplicate books – sometimes I kept one copy in the play room and other upstairs in the bedroom or I just regifted the extra without mentioning it – there’s a copy of the book they gave in the house if they happen to come over.
Anonymous says
Exactly this. I have a stock email with the kids’ clothing sizes, favorite colors, and interests. I also warn off things that people know my kids like but I don’t want more of. eg,”[son] has plenty of nerf guns and he’s still going strong with the 100-pack of darts you gave him for his birthday, but dress up accessories to go with them would be welcome.” “We already have a lot of crayons and coloring books, but [daughter] would like basically any kind of craft kit” or whatever.
I have not figured out a polite way to say PLEASE NO MORE STUFFED ANIMALS THEY ARE OVERRUNNING MY HOUSE. If anyone has ideas, I’m all ears.
Anonymous says
I think if someone asks for suggestions and then you give them suggestions and they’re rude about it, they’re the problem and need to stop complaining. I am assuming that it wasn’t all super expensive or something and was reasoanble in that respect.
Anon says
Arts and crafts seems like something where you could look for specific items and then tell people the category – watercolor paints, beading kit, cookie cutters, whatever. Or with duplos you could say she wants a duplo set about camping or outdoor activities. Pajamas and outdoor toys/sports equipment are also good gifts that are hard to get wrong.
Also does it really matter if you get duplicate duplos? If the issue is your kid doesn’t actually need stuff, then that’s a different thing altogether, in which case try to redirect to consumables like play dough and bath bubbles, or a Highlights or other magazine subscription.
anon says
Books and socks! If people are going to be annoyed by a list they asked for they cannot be helped. She is a size 5T in socks and loves books about cats.
Anon says
or you say something like “she loves arts & crafts, but ideally something without too much mess that she can do independently because she doesnt like it when we have to help her with the project. she is also super into stickers” and then if there are a specific brand or type of craft kit you can suggest those.