News Roundup

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Some of the articles of interest to working mothers that we’ve seen around the web recently…

  • The Wall Street Journal [gift link] reported that the battle to ban screens from school now includes Chromebooks and tablets.
  • Meanwhile, Vox explored Gen Alpha’s use of tech — including perspectives from kids themselves.
  • And for one more tech story, Teen Vogue shared what teens think about school phone bans.
  • NPR reported on a new study that links the recent use of personal care products like lotions and hair conditioners to higher levels of endocrine-disrupting chemicals called phthalates in young children.
  • Today’s Parent ran through the basics of a successful school day.
  • The New York Times [gift link] reported on a new study that found that girls’ brains aged far faster during pandemic lockdowns than expected, likely because of social isolation.
  • The Cut looked at how moms are taking over their kids’ dorm room decor.
  • Romper looked at the importance of fathers having dad friends.
  • Your Laugh of the Week comes from Frazzled, with “What the Grandparent Name You’ve Chosen for Yourself Says About You.”

Also, do be sure to check out the news update over at Corporette!

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Our daughter just started her freshman year. Facebook has been feeding me the Dorm Room Mamas posts since the spring and they are insane. They are all about how “WE are moving in” and “OUR room has …” I’ve also seen a lot of dorm move-in photos from my real-life peers and they look nothing like the Dorm Room Mamas rooms. Only one mom in my circle, who has always been a ridiculous steamroller mom, is even half as involved as the Dorm Room Mamas.

We have been very careful to put our daughter in charge of her own college experience. We did set some expectations about what we could afford (we can pay $X and you need to get merit or need-based aid to cover the rest), student loans (not allowed), spending money (she has to earn it), and major (if we are paying you will have one major that results in marketable skills, but you can double in something impractical and fun), and early decision (we couldn’t afford to lock ourselves into paying full freight). We provided the level of support necessary to get her through the application process. We let her choose which schools to visit and were not surprised when of her own accord she realized that characteristics she needed in a school were the same ones we thought she needed. Over the summer, we made it *her* job to get herself ready to leave, scaffolding only as necessary to maximize her independence while ensuring that she got everything done. I have never once communicated with the school and hope I never have to.

I did not design her dorm room; I just reminded her of the limitations on luggage capacity and storage space that she faces because the school is a plane ride away, and asked questions that helped her to realize that some of her ideas were impractical. We did drive a minivan full of stuff all the way there and help her set it up. It all fit neatly in her closet and under her bed. Who knows what the room looks like now. I shipped her a box full of things she had forgotten or refused to pack and later decided she wanted, but have not sent any themed care packages.

I don’t initiate communication. When she texts me all flustered about something I try to make my response as neutral as possible and to guide her to her own solution. There have been a few hiccups but overall she seems to be taking initiative and getting on top of things and I think she’s doing fine. The goal of my parenting for the last 17 years has been to create an independent, happy, successful adult, not to keep her a child for as long as possible. I’m so proud of how she’s settling in to college and just hope she continues on this path.

I just wrote a whole essay that got stuck in mod, but the gist of it is that in my very recent experience the Dorm Room Mamas are not a big thing in real life.